They swear they don’t wanna lose you but act like they ain’t tryna keep you either.

getting treated right is scary because like, are you fr?!??!?!??!?????!?!!

there should be a hotline for me to call autistic people with specific hyperfixations every time i have a question

One of the most dangerous things in the world is not being able to say no to people because you don't want to upset them or dissapoint them. This will completely ruin your life in every way possible, at work, in your private life, your sex life and your friendships. It's a way of removing your own consent in your own decisions and go against your wishes, it is always a crime against yourself. Let yourself have a say. Upsetting people is better than traumatizing yourself.

Sometimes I don't wanna be rough. Sometimes I just wanna get under thick blankets with you and lie between your legs and slowly grind my hips in so you gently feel it moving deep inside, scraping your walls. Slowly building up to a big orgasm that'll make you cry. Kissing you on your lips, gently biting them, making eye contact. Softly whispering in your ear how much I adore you, and how tight and warm your cunt feels as I move my hips

Signs of Autistic Burnout

Neurodivergent_lou

Witch bees!

she’s addictive because she has a pure heart and a dirty mind

Reblog if you support squishy bellies, have a squishy belly, or have the desire to summon satan

Touching grass isn't enough I need to move to the shire and live in a hobbit hole

@Galaxibrain444

MASKING MYTHS BUSTED: “Masking = Acting NT.”

FALSE.

Autistic masking does not necessarily mean “pretending to be allistic/neurotypical," although you’d definitely be forgiven for thinking it does.

Non-autistic researchers have been referring to it as “camouflaging” for years, framing it as an intentional choice to suppress autistic traits and replace them with allistic ones in order to “blend in.” Doing an internet search on the term will return several similar results.

But now, Autistic researchers are in the game, and their take is much more nuanced and comprehensive than that. (Funny how that happens, isn’t it?)

They’ve found that:

- It CAN be intentional but is often subconscious and involuntary 

- It is a protective response to trauma and feeling unsafe 

- It is often about suppressing more than just autistic traits 

- It is about identity management and being able to predict how people will treat you, not just “blending in”

Some people will lean into being “the bad kid” because they know that’s what people expect of them. Some people will even act “more autistic” because they know that’s what people expect of them. Others still will do things to attract attention in controllable, more “acceptable” ways to avoid attracting attention in unsafe, more stigmatizing ways. Not because they WANT to be that way, but because it lets them predict people’s responses better, which feels safer.

Also, there are Autistic people who can’t “pass” for non-autistic no matter how hard they try. That doesn’t mean they’re not masking. They may actually be working hard to suppress A LOT, they just can’t do everything to neuronormative standards.

None of these people will be accused of “blending in,” yet they are still masking their hearts out. When we assume they are not, we miss all the harm that masking is causing them. But they are suppressing themselves and suffering the consequences of that just as much as any Autistic person whose mask successfully says, “Hey, I’m just like you!”

(For more on this, please see the work of Dr. Amy Pearson and Kieran Rose.)

I don't really go to clubs or parties, but I love concerts. If I'm not careful, i can fully shut down the next day or even possibly during the event. Here is how I minimize any negative effects of these events!

For me, it MUST be an artist that I love and am really excited to see. The autistic joy actually helps me to handle more in the moment. I do, however, have to be aware of the fact that this short-term resilience can have a rebound effect. Just like how taking a steroid based medication makes you feel really good for a bit but then you might feel worse the next day, I can have this rebound from autistic joy with loud/social contexts.

So, how do I mediate this? I plan ahead.

I make sure I have plenty of opportunity for rest beforehand so that I have more true energy and lower chances of overdoing it. I spend this time putting extra effort into making sure my body, brain, and nervous system are regulated. I make sure to eat a healthy meal that fuels me right before and that I am well hydrated to ensure I don't face a crash from not taking care of my body.

I schedule time after the event (or the next day if it is a late night) to do things that help me re-regulate and re-charge. I plan this well ahead of time. Sometimes this means taking the next morning off of work so I can re-regulate and re-charge before having an afternoon at work. Sometimes this is making sure I don't have any plans or time sensative projects to attend to the next day. I also make sure I have sensory safe food in the house that fuels me well without too much effort.

For the actual event: I make sure to go extra early to eliminate the anxiety and emotional stress of rushing to something important to me. This also helps to limit my anxiety in long lines and allows me extra time to locate bathrooms and a safe space to go to if I get overwhelmed. I take a small purse with a sensory safe snack, a sensory safe electrolyte powder for if I need something more than just water (especially if I plan to drink), a couple stim toys, both "experience" earplugs (made for concerts and such) and complete block out earplugs (for if I'm really overwhelmed), and something that provides a positive sensory experience to help calm myself if needed. I have also learned my alcohol limits: 2 drinks all night max. If I get tipsy, my ability to handle the lights and sounds can easily go down hill. It doesn't happen everytime, but it happens enough. Additionally, vodka gives me social/sensory processing energy (lessening the chances of a negative reaction) while other alcohols make me tired, less resilient, or moody in these loud chaotic contexts.

I always communicate any concerns, safe phrases/signs, and boundaries before the event with those I am going with. This helps them to support me and understand the effects of my condition in these environments. It also helps them to understand that I might have a verbal shutdown or retreat into my own mind afterwards which, for me at least, is not necessarily bad (it means I'm too tired to communicate or interact, but I might still be vibin and having a good time experiencing the moment with them).

I hope this gives you some insight and helps you prepare for these events you want to attend!

questions for people on the autism spectrum, re: clubbing/parties

do you ever go clubbing/to parties?

if so, do you generally enjoy it? do you get overwhelmed?

if you get overwhelmed, does it happen immediately, after a while or do you feel it the next day? and how do you cope?

i lost my spark because i take care of everyone else before myself