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mjlovescm · 29 days

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16- Before everything changes forever let me be yours pt.1

Ongoing, 17/? chapters "Flashing Lights" Spencer Reid x black fem stripper reader Tw: mention of blood, Elle being shot, Nathan being hospitalized

The next morning, everything from the night before felt like a bad dream.

It should have ended when the two of you went to bed, but Spencer’s nightmares had you both shaken up. You tried to comfort your boyfriend or at least make sense of his scared, unconscious rambles. But nothing helped. So instead, Spencer kept himself awake with a book, and you slept on his chest.

In obvious need of a break and with his hand injured, Spencer took a few days away from work. Aware this was a sensitive time, you asked him if he wanted to be alone, to debrief mentally, but Spencer objected. Asking you if you could stay with him at his apartment.

More than happy to know what has been going on inside that big brain, you stayed with Spencer.

“What are we thinking tonight, baby, Italian or Chinese?”

Spencer’s phone rings, and you can already tell it's work. You look at Spencer, who’s already up with his phone in his hands.

“You can choose.” He says before pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I need to take this.”

“I know.” You give him a frown. “Chinese it is.”

Spencer stepped away and picked up the call. Unsurprisingly, being a part of the FBI meant there were no real days off. Even from home, Spencer was helping his team on their current case.

With the food on the way, you set up Spencer’s living room for movie night. First plates and utensils, then water and soda as drinks. You threw two blankets and pillows on his couch and added a few stuffed animals gifted from you. They were usually animals or historic figures, but Spencer adored them nonetheless.

Many minutes pass, and eventually Spencer returns to his living room and joins you on the couch. You’re flipping through options on what to watch when he sits beside you. On instinct, you move into his lap and Spencer wraps his arms around you. He presses a kiss into the back of your head and settles his chin on your shoulder.

“I chose the food, do you wanna choose the movie?” You asked Spencer as you moved to a different streaming platform.

He shakes his head.

“Are you sure? I’m down for a penguin doc if you are. Oh! The one about the two gay dads is so cute. That or we can watch Happy feet.”

Spencer squints his eyes curiously and smiles.

“Happy feet isn't a documentary, it’s a movie.” Spencer states the obvious, not sensing your joke.

It’s cute how literally Spencer takes you, it makes for cute little moments like this.

“I know that, but I like watching those little guys dance. It’s cute.” you imitate dancing legs with your fingers.

His smile grows.

“Baby, we can watch anything you’d like.” Spencer says before he kisses the base of your neck.

He starts with one, but Spencer can’t help but indulge in your soft brown skin. Kisses turn to cuddles, and Spencer’s naughty hands travel down your body. But before things can go any further, there’s a knock at the door.

“F-food.” you struggle to speak with Spencer’s needy lips attached to yours.

“In a second.”

A moment passes and the delivery person knocks again, harder this time.

"Number one Chinese." They announce.

After you and Spencer force yourself apart, you get the warm, sweet smelling brown bag and tip the young man.

When it comes to food, no time is wasted. Your hunger for each other subsides and you quickly fill your plates.

For a good few minutes, Spencer’s apartment is silent besides the sounds of eating. While you happily fill your stomach, Spencer shifts his rice around, taking few bites. He says nothing about the food, no complaints, no compliments.

It goes unnoticed at first, but it doesn't take long for you to pick up on it. After swallowing another spoonful of white rice, you clean the corners of your mouth and carefully question your boyfriend's drop in aura. Ever since the broken glass incident not too long ago, you’d handled Spencer with extra care. Although you wanted to know what he was going through, you knew pressing for more might not be the best way to help Spencer.

“Not feeling the Chinese tonight? We can get some donuts for dessert.”

He shakes his head, flashing you a weak smile.

“No, it’s… it’s not the food.” Spencer sets his spoon down and shifts his body to face yours. “I just have a lot on my mind.”

“I know.” you reply quickly, maybe faster than you should have.

I mean, it was no surprise that Spencer had a lot on his mind, he had a lot going on. With his hand healing and with work invading his “off” days, your boyfriend was being worn thin. Not to mention the things you didn’t know about.

“It's my fault.” I repeat. “Elle was shot because of me, and I couldn't help Nathan.”

Your mind flashes back to that night. The blood on his hands and the fear in his voice.

“You know you can always talk to me about it.” You hesitate. “About them.”

His brown puppy dog eyes drop.

“I know, I just-” He swallows. “I don’t want you to worry.”

Nervous, you scoff and chuckle at the same time.

“Spencer, I'm your girlfriend. I’m always gonna worry, I can’t help it.”

You tilt your head to meet Spencer's dropped gaze.

It was true. Being with him gave you a closer look at the horrors he dealt with on a daily basis. Whether it was overhearing work calls in the quiet of night, accidentally seeing case photos on Spencer’s phone, or worse, your own previous encounter with an unsub. You’d be lying if you said it didn't keep you up sometimes.

But even when those restless nights came, no matter what was keeping you up, Spencer was there to comfort you. So why wouldn't you be there for him?

“I would rather worry and know what I’m worrying about than have you struggle by yourself.”

His brown eyes meet yours, and you gave your boyfriend a hopeful smile. Running your fingers through his soft brown hair, you rested your hand at the back of his head before giving his forehead a kiss.

“You don’t have to tell me in detail, but when you get like that-” your voice shakes as the corners of your eyes fill with what will soon be tears. “When you get like that, just try to tell me. I’ll come over, and we can get food and watch movies or do whatever you need to feel better.”

Seeing your teary eyes moves Spencer’s to follow suit, and soon he’s in your arms crying.

“It was my fault Elle was shot and Nathan, I couldn't- I could'nt help him.”

“Why do you think it’s your fault?”

He’s silent for a moment, searching for the right words within his sorrow.

“I was the one who told my team's secrets to my mom. That’s what led the Fisher king to her. She could’ve died because of me. And now she’s left the BAU. And Nathan he- he needed my help and I-.”

He tells you as much as he can. Considering, there was case confidentiality and personal details that didn’t need to be shared. Spencer didn’t tell you much, but he told you enough for you to know that he felt guilty for Elle leaving and for Nathan being hospitalized. He knew they both needed help and felt that although he'd tried, he hadn't done enough. As if, if Spencer had done more, the two wouldn't be where they are now.

You took a second to take everything in, and thank him for sharing with you, before comforting the now upset Spencer. It was such a relief to finally know what was going on in your boyfriend's big head. And an even bigger one to know that he could let you in.

After many quiet minutes in each other's arms, you and Spencer resume your movie night. He rewarms the food while you go back to choosing tonight's movie. When Spencer returns, he cuddles up next to you. Surrounded by pillows, covered in shared blankets and eating Chinese, the two of you spend the rest of the night on the couch.

A stronger couple now than before.

Next chapter – 17 – Before everything changes forever let me be yours pt.2 All chapters – 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23 My full masterlist

#wmbw #bwwm #spencer reid x black reader #spencer x reader #spencer reid #black fem reader #mjlovescm #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x black!reader #black!reader #criminal minds

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mjlovescm · 1 month

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Date night with Rodrick means getting high and doing arts and crafts 🩷🖤

#mjlovescm #black fem reader #rodrick x reader #rodrick heffley #black!reader #rodrick imagines

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mjlovescm · 1 month

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writing insta page is up !

Okay so I set up the writing instagram page. I only have one post so far so bare with me but I will start to post more soon.

Check it out - https://www.instagram.com/mjlovescm/

#mjlovescm #writing page #writing #fanfic writing #young writer #instagram

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mjlovescm · 1 month

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I have loved reading your Spencer Reid fic! I’m going through a fixation with him right now as I binge the show and I was struggling to find good lengthy stories with him and a black OC. Looking forward to future updates 🩷

omg thank you for enjoying my fic. I remember rediscovering Criminal Minds and bringing watching it too. I hope you enjoy the rest of the fic as it plays out.

#mjlovescm #spencer reid #black fem reader #spencer reid x black!reader

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mjlovescm · 1 month

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BEWARE OF WEIRDO’S AND SCAMMERS.

I’m bored so can yall report this man. thank you 💋

Actually I'm looking for a sugar baby that will talk to me whenever I'm bored and someone whom I can share my thought with

#scammers #scam alert #scam #scam likely #money scams

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mjlovescm · 1 month

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Been thinking about sugar daddy Spencer 🤭🤭

#mjlovescm #black fem reader #spencer reid #criminal minds #spencer reid x reader #sugarbaby #sugardaddy

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mjlovescm · 1 month

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Traces of you on my pillowcase, 🍋

A/n: idk how I feel about this one but I am clearing old one shots out, so enjoy!

Turning in his bed, Rodrick presses his face to his pillow. Snoring, he inhales deeply. A familiar scent fills his nose and your name rings in his mind.

A few minutes pass and Rodrick can’t fight it anymore. His eyes aren't open, but he's definitely awake. And earlier than he needs to be at that. Rodrick groans, glancing at his alarm clock. There's still two hours before he needs to drag himself out of bed.

Eyes still closed, Rodrick stayed in bed in hopes of falling back to sleep naturally. After a few minutes of tossing and turning, he gives up. Annoyed, Rodrick buries his face in a pillow and yells. Once he’s done, though, the scent is back, stronger this time.

Head still submerged in the soft case, the smell of you brought Rodrick back to the night before.

Cuddling in bed together, in matching pajamas, and eating ice cream. That was after Rodrick showed you how much he missed you by burying his fingers in you. But no matter how long you and Rodrick spent together, it was never enough for him. Because after those hours of fun, you’d have to go home, and Rodrick would be left without you again.

His hips shift against his bed, and it's clear Rodrick is more than awake.

“Fuck.” he whispers to himself, growing harder.

Again he turns, laying on his back and clearing the messy brown hair from his face. Slowly, Rodrick lifted his cover and found a great opportunity to be out like a light in only a few minutes. All thanks to you. Well, you and your smell.

He drops the cover, leaving his hand beneath it. Rodrick starts slowly, his palm gently grazing his boxers. The layer of clothes was an added touch to the overall sensations. The feel of the fabric against his sensitive skin sends chills through his body.

His mind as always led to you. Eyes closed, Rodrick uses his dirty memories of you to replace his hands with yours.

He envisions soft brown hands. Palming him with a mischievous smile.

“Already?” you’d question with a needy smile and dangerous eyes.

As if you hadn’t been working him up for an hour and playing innocent.

“Dirty girl.” He whispers to himself.

Quickly freeing himself from the now tight confident of his boxers, Rodrick continues to touch himself to the thought of you.

With a firm grip, Rodrick holds his dick in his hand. He groans at the feeling of his slow up and down pumps. He keeps this pace as pre-cum drips from his tip. With a wet thumb, Rodrick presses slow, deep circles against this sensitive spot.

“I know you like it sloppy.”

His mind plays your previous words back to him, forcing a noise from Rodrick.

“I love it when you moan.”

Sensitive, Rodrick’s hips push back into the bed. But still he continues to tease himself in your honor.

“Mmm, baby j- uh- just like that.”

His thumb leaves his tip, and Rodrick’s hands quicken. The pumps quickly grew faster and faster.

“Ugh-h y-y/n.” He moans. “Just like that baby.”

Wrist speeding up, Rodrick’s change in pace fuels more thoughts and memories of you. Filthy fantasies, either real or not. All of you. His beautiful, loving girlfriend.

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” He says through his teeth.

Again and Again he strokes himself, reaching a desperation he was all too familiar with. And with that desperation and speed comes a certain roughness. In the way he gripped himself, the way his hands moved. Fast and messy.

“Ye-yes.” Rodrick says with a shaky voice. “Keep fucking going ba-bay I- I-”

Rodrick turns himself into a stuttering mess over you. He pushes himself closer and closer to that sweet release. Without a second thought, Rodrick finishes saying your name. Praising the hypothetical you as he does.

Minutes pass, adrenaline dies down and sleep sets in. Rodrick turns to his alarm clock and feels a sudden sense of accomplishment.

“I think that’s a new record.” He tells himself.

Just as before, Rodrick lifts his cover and finds the mess he’s made of himself. Hands, fingers and sheets. Whether it was sweat or cum, he was covered in it nonetheless.

Instead of rolling over and calling it a day, Rodrick exits his room with a towel and makes his way to the shower. For a cleanup and… for round two.

Masterlist Drum Lesson, 🍋 Makeup sex, 🍋

#rodrick heffley #rodrick x reader #rodrick heffley smut #black fem reader #black!reader #black reader smut #mjlovescm #reader insert smut #reader insert

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mjlovescm · 1 month

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First Rodrick oneshot in a while omg

Back on my writing grind so that means feeding y'all with more! Traces of you on my pillowcase out this Saturday !

“I know you like it sloppy.”

His mind plays your previous words back to him, forcing a noise from Rodrick.

“I love it when you moan.”

Sensitive, Rodrick’s hips push back into the bed. But still he continues to tease himself in your honor.

#rodrick heffley #rodrick x reader #rodrick heffley smut #black fem reader #black!reader #black reader smut #mjlovescm #reader insert smut #reader insert #rodr #rodrick imagines

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mjlovescm · 1 month

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15- It's not your fault

Ongoing, 17/? chapters "Flashing Lights" Spencer Reid x black fem stripper reader Spencer's pov Trigger warning: Mentions of cuts, blood, bleeding, Self inflicted wounds, drunk & sad Spencer

The back of y/n's car feels empty without her beside me. I find my eyes drifting to the side, expecting to see her. But when I'm greeted with my reflection in her car window, I'm reminded that Sydney has taken my spot.

I wonder if this is how Sydney feels. As if I've replaced her.

A twinge of guilt stabs me at the thought of being the thing coming between the two.

“Where do you wanna go baby, my place or yours ?” y/n asks as she runs a hand through my hair, pushing the loose pieces behind my ear.

I curl into her hand, smiling at the feeling of her soft fingers and long nails.

We decided on my apartment. The drive feels like nothing, I blink and y/n is parking in front of my apartment. Then we're walking up to it and my legs have never felt so heavy. Suddenly the door is open, and I'm on the couch.

I'm not sure how long I spend sinking into my cold dark brown leather. But the longer I sit, the more aware I become of the pounding in my chest. The beating of my own heart fills my ears, growing louder and louder.

My hands hurry to undo my tie before my fingers do the same, releasing my chest from the confines of the dark blue button up shirt I was wearing. With blurry eyes, I stare at my chest, watching the way it jumps again and again, fuelled by my beating heart.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5… I count the beats in my head.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5… I count up to 60 seconds.

This isn't the first time I've counted my heart beats nor the first time I've done it in fear, yet this one feels more urgent.

I hear the flush of the toilet and turn my head to the sound and suddenly remember y/n was with me.

I shake off this uncomfortable feeling and force myself to stand. The room lags, and I'm up faster than I expected. The room turns as I use a few pillows to steady myself. Once I'm sure I can find my way to the kitchen, I walk the best I can.

Water. That's what I need. I'd love to blame my sensitivity to alcohol on my lack of party invitations during college or high school, but my eating habits are partly to blame. Stressful cases and losing team members has left me with a stomach filled with nothing but bad coffee and sugar.

“Nothing but bad coffee and sugar.”

I chuckle to myself at the thought. Hearing it in y/n's voice instead of my own.

The cup overflows, but I pay it no mind. I bring the unsteady water to my mouth, pressing my lips to the glass before struggling to catch the rocky water. I cautiously sip as the cool liquid flows down the sides of my mouth, neck, and chest. I swallow desperately and breathe as if I'll run out of air.

I turn, and she's standing there in the kitchen behind me. A warm feeling crashes over me as my eyes meet hers. Lazily I smile.

The corner of her lips curl, but the rest of her face is confused.

“I think you spilled some.” she refers to the stream running down my body.

I apologized and rested my glass on the kitchen counter. Ripping a handful of paper towels from the roll, I go to clean up my mess. And instead, I only find myself creating a bigger one.

Crash. The cup hits the ground. Sending pieces of shattered glass and water across the kitchen floor.

We both jumped at the alarming sound. I look up at y/n from my spot below her. That twinge of pain returns in another place. The sharp ache shoots through my hand. Palm and fingers pierced. I lift my free hand and a red print takes its place.

I turn to calm y/n, but she's gone.

I stare at my cut up hand with an all too familiar feeling. The physical pain is something I'm accustomed to.

That's not what turns my stomach upside down, though. It's the blood itself. The dark red slowly seeping from every cut varying in size. Streams finding each other, connecting and dripping down my wrist into a long line down my wrist and arm.

Nathan Harris. My mind reminds me in a harsh flash.

I bring my thumb and index finger together at their tips. The dark red fills my fingerprints in, flooding the many circles.

Elle Greenway. My cruel mind reminds me.

Y/n comes rushing in with a towel. She grabs my hand and hurries me to the bathroom. The alcohol makes me much more mellow and less reactionary. While she panics to clean the blood from my hand and remove the glass, I sit there quietly, but mentally I'm elsewhere.

I watch myself bleed with a numb expression and sick feeling. Drops of red drip into my bathroom sink. Y/n doesn't know what to do, with one of her now bloody hands she turns the water on.

For a few seconds, the cuts sting. It's an overwhelming pain, and then it just stops. I get used to the feeling and then everything goes numb. The pain isn't gone, but I'm almost less aware of it.

I stare off into the distance and y/n becomes a blur. My mind fills with dark thoughts.

Is this how Elle felt? Did Nathan's cuts burn the same way mine do?

Did their pain consume them before it all became too much?

I close my eyes and see Nathan. Laying on that motel bed, bleeding from his self-inflicted wounds. A darkness in his eyes, a black, desperate void. Lacking in light and warmth.

The same eyes Elle had had since she was shot.

The same eyes I see in victims, witnesses, the dead, and the ones who steal the light that was stolen from them.

If they ever had it.

Head spinning, my body falls backward.

Y/n calls my name softly, carefully.

“Baby, what's wrong?” Her voice shakes as she cups my face.

Wiping away the tears I weren't aware were there until now.

“It's- it's” I struggle. “It's all my fault.”

I meet her eyes and my lips quiver. I breath as if I'd been holding my breath all this time.

“It's my fault.” I repeat. “Elle was shot because of me, and I couldn't help Nathan.”

She shakes her head, confused.

“What? Who's Nathan?”

“I knew something was wrong. I tried to talk to her.”

But it was too late. Maybe Elle was destined to leave the BAU the moment she was shot. Or the moment I told my team's secrets to my mother.

I ramble on and on. It's all my fault, I repeat again and again… because it is. Nathan and Elle are where they are because of me.

Y/n tries her best to ease my mental and physical pain. Eventually I tire myself out and we both go quiet.

We're in the bathroom for what feels like forever. With a pair of tweezers and y/n's phone flashlight. I remove the small shards of glass from my hand and carefully discard them. Once my hand is as glass free as it can be, y/n helps me with cleaning it up.

Her mind runs to hydrogen peroxide, but with my professional expertise, we used some gauze with warm water and soap.

I can tell, by the back and forth of her eyes between my hand and my eyes, she wants to ask me about them. But she doesn't. Instead, we wrap my hand and crawl into bed together.

I face away from y/n knowing she's watching me. Her arms wrap around me, and she brushes my hair away from my ear.

“I know you can't help it, but…” She thinks before speaking, cautious of my reaction. “Elle and Nathan wouldn't blame you, so please don't blame yourself, baby. Please.”

I take her words in but drowning in guilt it means nothing.

Next chapter – 16 – Before everything changes forever let me be yours pt.1 All chapters – 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23 My full masterlist

#wmbw #bwwm #spencer reid x black reader #spencer x reader #spencer reid #black fem reader #mjlovescm #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x black!reader #black!reader #criminal minds

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mjlovescm · 2 months

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Writing insta page

Hey yall imma be starting an insta page for my writing. Not only to give you guys insight on when things will be coming out. But also to get to know you all a bit more, share more about my future non fanfic projects and just a general writing page. I will also most likely be posting any fanfic/ writing advice on here as well.

It'll be up in a week or two just give me time. In the mean while don't be afraid to send me any questions, topics or anything that all you might wanna see on my insta and on here as well.

Also check out my main insta Plzzzz

#mjlovescm #fanfic writing #writing #young writer #black writblr #black writers #writing page #instagram #writers on tumblr

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mjlovescm · 2 months

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Bad words, Lo'ak Sully

You remember the day like it was yesterday. When you and your tribe had been introduced to the Sully family. The “disgraced forest Naʼvi” who ran from their home. The great Toruk Makto rider of the last shadow, running to and hiding with your people.

At Least that's what most thought of the strange family when they first arrived. But not you. You were intrigued by them, one of them in particular. Lo’ak was the second son and second to youngest child. With a premade “troublemaker” label slapped on him. Most stayed away from Lo’ak but happy to help him and his family integrate into their new lives, you didn't.

It didn't take long for the two of you to become familiar with each other, and eventually a friendship sprung. Although you were the one doing most of the teaching when it came to swimming, that didn't mean Lo’ak didn't teach you anything.

“Asshole.”

“A-a” You struggle to pronounce the new word.

“Sound it out.”

English words felt odd to your tongue and mind. Before meeting Lo’ak you’d never heard words like asshole or bitch. Which explained why you couldn't pronounce them. But he would teach you anyway.

“Ass-h-h” You continue until the two of you are interrupted.

A group of boys passes by and as always they can’t help but want to start something with Lo’ak. He never started it with them, but the problem was Lo’ak wasn't afraid to finish it.

“Careful hanging out with freaks.” Aonung says, walking up to the two of you.

“Yea, you might turn into one.” One of his friends adds.

They all laugh and the two of you choose to ignore it, unfazed by the childish boys.

“Or maybe she wants that.” The other joins in. “You two freaks belong together.”

Lo’ak stays silent, knowing that engaging would only lead to something worse.

“Asshole.” You spit in frustration before realizing what you’d just said.

The three boys look at you and each other confused.

“See like that.” Lo’ak grins, “You got it.”

“What?” Aonung is only more confused.

“She called you an asshole.” Lo’ak defends you happily.

Aonung glares at the two of you, upset by you and Lo’ak’s shared moment.

“You’re right.” He turns to his friends. “The two freaks belong together.”

When it came to Aonung and Lo’ak it was best to separate them before things went overboard. Which they usually did. So instead of staying in your and Lo’aks teaching spot, you took his hand and started to walk away together.

“Come on, let's go.”

“Did you see Aonung’s face? He has no idea what you said.”

The two of you try to get away, but the boys are persistent in taunting Lo’ak. And when that doesn’t work, they start to do the same to you. Truthfully, Aonung's antics were something you were used to after growing up with him. But as always, whatever Aonung started, Lo’ak finishes.

Letting go of your hand, Lo’ak lets you get some distance ahead of him before grabbing a handful of sand and throwing it in Aonung’s face. A fight breaks out between the four, and you panic. You yell for Neteyam, and he runs over quickly to separate the boys.

Hours pass and the bruises on Aonung make it clear that something had occurred. Disappointed and appalled by the fight, Jake, Neytiri, Tonowari, and Ronal spoke to all of you. After being scolded for your behavior, you were all told to go to bed, but before you could leave, Jake pulled you aside and questioned you on your language after Aonung told him what word you’d called him. He knew Lo’ak was the one who taught you the word, but you persisted in the fact that you said it because you chose to.

Aware of how harsh his father's words can be, Lo’ak snuck past his father to check up on you.

“I told my dad that I said it.” Lo’ak tells you with his head down in defeat.

“You didn’t have to. I told him that I said it, not you.”

The thought of Lo’ak taking the fall for you was a far from pleasant one. You didn’t enjoy being scolded or in trouble at all, but your words pushed Aonung and Lo’ak was just defending you.

“It doesn't matter, I'm already in deep shit.”

You both frown but Lo’ak jokes about his and Neteyam's fight with Aonung and his friends. You laugh together quietly so as not to be heard.

“You’re right.” You look at Lo’ak before leaving to your home. “Aonung is a bitch.”

He looks slightly shocked to hear you say it, but you both laugh it off and say goodnight.

Masterlist - mjlovescm

#avatar way of water #avatar 2009 #lo'ak sully #lo'ak te suli tsyeyk'itan #lo'ak x reader #lo'ak avatar #reader insert

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mjlovescm · 2 months

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Lo'ak oneshot coming soon

Lo'ak teaching you a few scandales English words...

“She called you an asshole.” Lo’ak defends you happily.

Aonung glares at the two of you, upset by you and Lo’ak’s shared moment.

“You’re right.” He turns to his friends. “The two freaks belong together.”

Masterlist - mjlovescm

#avatar way of water #avatar 2009 #lo'ak sully #lo'ak te suli tsyeyk'itan #lo'ak x reader #lo'ak avatar #reader insert

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mjlovescm · 2 months

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14- Drunk words, sober thoughts

Ongoing, 17/? "Flashing Lights" Spencer Reid x black fem stripper reader Spencer's pov

It's going to be a long night, I can tell.

I look over to Elle's empty desk and my stomach turns. I force my head back to the paperwork in front of me and continue writing. The last few days have been hard.

A difficult case, Elle gone and meeting a young man who I couldn't help but see myself in had left me restless. Tossing and turning in uncomfortable hotel beds didn't help.

But being back at Quantico meant being close to you.

My phone vibrates in the corner of my desk

“sorry baby, I'm running late. Syd needed a ride, but I'm On my way!.”

I type a quick reply assuring her it's okay and set my phone aside. Continuing with my paper work, I wait patiently.

…

The parking lot is buzzing with conversation. Derek, Penelope, and JJ planned to go to a bar to relieve the stress of the case. While Hotch, Gideon and I are on our way home.

The sight of a certain car makes me smile. She exits the driver's side and makes her way towards me. Our bodies meet in a warm embrace before our lips do the same.

“There you go, pretty boy.” Derek shouts. “I see you.”

It's not long until Garcia and JJ's confusion at what they'd just seen turns into interest. The two of them with Derek approach us.

Names are exchanged along with excitement and congratulations.

“Oh my god! Where have you been hiding her?” Penelope hits my arm. “You have to come out with us tonight.”

She demands not suggest.

“We can't,” I interrupt.

“Spencer's right. I'm dropping my friend off and-”

“Is that your friend in the car?” Derek asks in a familiar tone and flirtatious wave at Sydney.

“Yea, she's going home on break.”

“College girl.” He exclaims. “If I can get her out with us, would that change your mind ?”

“I-”

He doesn't wait for an answer, convinced he can charm her into agreeing.

With his confident stride and pearly white smile, Derek was a true ladies man. Or a dog… depending on who you ask. So it came as no surprise when Sydney did in fact agree. Well, it came as no surprise to everyone except y/n.

The ride to the bar is tense, quiet too. No one says a word to one another. It's strange compared to previous car rides with y/n. Not, only because Sydney was here, which left me in the back seat. But again because no one was saying anything.

I was prepared to indulge in simple, soft conversation with my girlfriend and go home with her. But this night was turning into something different. With everyone excited to mingle and drink, I decided to keep quiet. Not wanting to sour the mood with my sour thoughts.

But once we all got to the bar, I realized I'm not the only one feeling a bit low.

While Sydney mingles with Derek. JJ and Penelope get drinks for the group. Y/n and I stay close to each other, and she doesn't seem like herself.

“How was your day ?”

She doesn't reply. Eyes set on Sydney across the room, and mind even further away.

“Baby.” I whisper, placing my hand on the bottom of her back.

Immediately, her head turns to me, and she covers her distressed face with a small smile.

“Is everything okay?”

“Of course.” She tells me at first before deciding to be a bit more truthful. “I'm sorry, I just—Syd's been acting weird and I don't know why.”

There's a pause as she glances over to her best friend.

“But don't worry about it, baby, we're here to have fun tonight.”

Y/n tries to quickly move past it, but I can tell there's more. I press lightly to know more on Sydney acting “weird”.

“Weird how?”

“She hasn't been replying or answering my calls.”

She explains that Sydney hadn't been replying or answering her calls recently. Normally, breaks from school were spent together in y/n's apartment, but instead Sydney had called on short notice for a ride home. Which y/n vaguely described as new.

“And then suddenly she wants to get drinks with eyebrows over there. No offense.”

A smile creeps up on my lips at the eyebrow's comment.

“Do you think it's because of me? I could talk to her if you'd like. Use tonight as an opportunity to get on her good side.”

“No,” She disagrees, shaking her head slightly. “I mean the Lilia thing was bad, but that was a while ago and since then we've been nothing but good.” She thought about it for a second. “I mean, friends don't usually like each other's boyfriends, but that's no reason for her to freeze me out.”

Penelope and JJ return with drinks, alcohol for most. Wanting to keep a clear head and as a self-appointed designated driver, you stuck to soda. Drinking is something I've rarely ever done, but oddly enough, JJ buys me a drink regardless.

“You looked like you needed one.”

I accept the thoughtful gesture and sip the dark liquor, hoping it gives me the courage needed when it comes to speaking with Sydney.

Thankfully, y/n and I were able to squeeze in some conversation in between her being pulled away. Whether it was dancing with Penelope, dart throwing with JJ, or being avoided by her best friend.

It hurt to watch y/n follow behind Sydney only to return to me with a defeated, confused expression. Unsure why her friend suddenly wanted nothing to do with her.

Her plump lips press a kiss to my cheek while her hand grips my chin.

“How ya feelin' baby?” She asks genuinely, picking up on my low mood by my lack of interactions with others besides her.

I give her a lazy small smile.

“Good.” It's a half-truth. “And you?”

She smiles, thinking back on the night so far.

“I'm having some fun, yea. Except losing at darts and… Sydney.”

We're silent for a moment, y/n rests her body on mine, and her skin is warm. If we were at home, mine or hers, I'd wrap our bodies together and hold her as if she'd disappear at any moment.

I stare at the small amount of brown liquid left in my hand as I rotate the glass cup. The feeling is odd. I feel out of body in a way, as if I'm merely watching myself from afar. Yet it's comforting thinking slowly. Calmly even. I wonder if this is the “liquid courage” that makes difficult conversations easy. Well, I'd be finding out in a moment.

I ordered a second drink to catch up on the shots Sydney had taken. I want us to be on the same playing field. I'd hate for the alcohol to impair her emotions and cause further damage to their friendship.

I keep in mind that any conflict between the two is to be handled by them. So this talk wasn't to fix whatever was wrong, but was to properly introduce myself.

Derek seems confused when I ask him to bring Sydney over. I tell him it's nothing to worry about, and he tells me, “girlfriend drama is not something you wanna mess with. It might leave you with a nasty scar, pretty boy.”.

I heed his warning.

The drinks she'd had made Sydney unafraid of speaking her mind. Or controlling her facial expressions.

We start with the basics, names, origins, occupation, and education. She's impressed by my Intelligence. Praising me for expanding my knowledge instead of “giving up early” referring to ending your education with a high school diploma. I don't question her choice of words, focusing solely on our shared love of learning. As the conversation continues, my new glass lessons and Sydney has a curious question for me.

“Can I ask you something?” She slurs slightly and asks carefully.

My assumptions are that it's Lilia Archer related, understandably she'd be curious. My mind races at the thought of y/n being hurt by me and Sydney having a vendetta against me for hurting her. I bring the glass to my lips and tilt my head back to prepare me for her questioning.

“What do you see in y/n?” She pauses. “Honestly.”

“Everything.” I answer in my mind, but Sydney continues before I can speak.

“I'm just…” her eyes drift to you in the crowd.

Happily dancing beside a tipsy JJ, Penelope, and Derek.

“Surprised you'd get with someone like y/n. You know you're not her type and I doubt she's yours.”

I take a big swallow as the words leave her mouth. “You know you're not her type.”. The burn of the alcohol feels more present as Sydney's words become more distant.

She cocks her head and continues to ask me questions as I struggle.

“I mean, it's gotta be fucking awkward-” She spits the vulgar word out. “dating a stripper when you have such an important job.”

The fire in my throat spreads.

“I mean, do they even know?” The team, I assume she's referring to.

“Know what?” I struggle to let out.

“That your girlfriend gets paid to dance on the same guys you lock up for a living.”

I couldn't help but cough and excuse myself before running to order some water. The burn in my throat is calmed by overpriced bar water.

Only now do I realize how far away the two drinks have taken me above my body and mind.

Next chapter – 15 – It's not your fault All chapters – 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23 My full masterlist

#wmbw #bwwm #spencer reid x black reader #spencer x reader #spencer reid #black fem reader #mjlovescm #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x black!reader #black!reader #criminal minds

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mjlovescm · 2 months

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Illicit affairs, Spencer Reid

Very old Spencer oneshot inspired by "Illicit affairs" by Taylor Swift.

“Meet me outside in seven minutes. We need to end this now.”

As you read the text, you could feel your stomach turning.

“We need to end this now.”

We, huh? He ended it months ago, so what could he possibly need to talk about. You walk to the gift table and drop your present off. Perfume and cologne. The same ones they wore the first day they met each other. No name signed on that part would hurt too much.

You asked Spencer so you could be exact about what you planned to buy. It's a simple gift, really, but it's the thought that counts. It's sweet with sentimental value. The perfect gift for the perfect couple. The perfect girlfriend and boyfriend, soon to be the perfect husband and wife.

With the gift gone, you walked towards the exit before being stopped by a worried Penelope.

“Y/n have you seen Spencer ?” Your heart drops. “We want to start soon, and the guests are getting anxious.”

You panicked not knowing what to say so you shake your head instead. You were flustered, your face warm in anticipation.

Of course, everyone is anxious. No one wants the groom to be missing on the wedding day. Everyone's looking for him, and he's waiting for you outside. You felt disgusted with yourself. Guilt was written all over your face. And soon tears would be too.

Scanning the parking lot, the only person you could see was a tall man in a large dark coat. You almost didn't want it to be him.

It had been ages since you and Spencer spoke one on one, and you knew this would be just like the last time. He'll tell you it's over, the best thing to do now is to move on. But maybe this time would be different, maybe this time you would say what needed to be said. Maybe this time you'll be the one he wants…

The man turns around, revealing himself, his face covered by the hood on the coat. You smiled seeing him again, all dressed up with his long brown hair gelled back and the bowline glasses that fit his face perfectly. You opened your arms for a hug, any sort of embrace from him. Instead of doing the same, Spencer roughly grabbed you by your arm, pushing you against a car behind him. Making sure no one could see you.

This isn't the time or place to make a scene.

“Why are you here?” He barked.

“What no hi, hello you good y/n.” you attempted to lighten the situation.

Clearly you failed.

“Answer the question,” he demanded.

From this angle you could see his face fully, it was lit up by the moon. Being pressed against the car brought back memories. Memories of him and you, but his face lit by candles, and you were pressed against his bed. Naked.

“Are you gonna answer or not?”

“Surprisingly, I was invited by the bride, Ms. Jennifer Jareau. Well, soon to be Jennifer Reid, but I highly doubt she'll take your last name.”

The tension and anger is visible not just on his face, but also in the way he was holding you. His nails digging into your skin, you still pressed to the car. The only time he was as you was when you threatened to tell her about your relationship. If you could really ever call it that.

“Fine. Then why did you show up.” he hissed.

He lets go of you, he knows remaining calm was the best thing to do. He wouldn't ever hurt you, at least not in a way you wouldn't enjoy.

“Why wouldn't I show up? My friends are getting married.”

You state the obvious.

“You know why you shouldn't show you. We've been over this y/n, it was a lap in my judgment, JJ and I were having issues, and you comforted me when things escalated.”

“A lapse in judgment for almost half a year.” you yelled, pain cracking your voice.

His hands flew over your mouth and Spencer silenced you.

“Y/n, JJ is my best friend, okay she means the world to me. I'm sorry I no longer think about us the same way you do, but the fact is… I am marrying the love of my life today.” He speaks slow and careful, praying you understand. “You telling her we slept together for a few months would break her trust in me, in our relationship, in your friendship with her, but most importantly, it would break her.”

It would. It would absolutely shatter her, you couldn't care less what happens to Spencer in the end. But JJ, she deserves to be happy. She deserves the truth, right?

Spencer calms himself and takes a step away from you as you think.

“Fine, I wasn't planning on telling her anything anyway. But I have to stay for the wedding.” you attempted to stand your ground.

“No.” He demanded. “No, you have to leave. Coming here was one thing, but staying is something else.”

You stood still, frozen in disbelief. He didn't trust you enough to stay.

How did everything crumple so fast ? How did he go from crying in my arms about how much he missed her to coldly forcing me away again ? You could feel the tears in the corners of your eyes. It soon became hard to breathe, but you hold yourself together. Crying in front of Spencer wasn't something you could do, not again. Not now.

“Promise me you won't have any more laps in your judgment, JJ doesn't deserve that, no one does.”

As you began to walk away, you felt Spencer pull you back. His cold hands cup your face. He kisses you, forcing your face into his. His hands shake from the moment, from the cold, from you. Spencer pulled away from you with tears forming in his eyes.

“I love you, y/n.” He whispers it, like the secret it is. “Thank you sincerely.”

He ran back towards the building at the speed of light. Leaving you in shock as you stood alone in the large, dark parking lot. That was the first time he'd said those words.

You walked to your car freezing, your jacket left in the coat check. Silent, you sat in the car for a moment before releasing a large sad sigh. It felt like the first time you'd breathed in months. For too long, you were caught in Spencer's awful chokehold. Without your notice, tears streamed down your face as you looked at the building in your rearview mirror.

You could stay sure, but what would be the point?

This night was painful enough, JJ doesn't need that kind of hurt.

“She deserves happiness and he deserves her. No one else needs to get hurt tonight.” you repeat to yourself as you drive away.

Masterlist - mjlovescm "Flashing Lights" Spencer Reid x black fem stripper reader fic

#spencer x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x black!reader #criminal minds #jennifer jareau #penelope garcia #illicit affairs #taylor swift #folklore #criminal minds imagine

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mjlovescm · 2 months

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New/ old Spencer Reid oneshot coming in two days 🖤

“I love you, y/n.” He whispers it, like the secret it is. “Thank you sincerely.”

He ran back towards the building at the speed of light. Leaving you in shock as you stood alone in the large, dark parking lot. That was the first time he'd said those words.

Masterlist - mjlovescm "Flashing Lights" Spencer Reid x black fem stripper reader fic

#spencer x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x black!reader #criminal minds #jennifer jareau #penelope garcia #illicit affairs #taylor swift #folklore

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mjlovescm · 2 months

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13- Letters to your mama

Ongoing, 17/? "Flashing Lights" Spencer Reid x black fem stripper reader

Somehow, someway, you and Spencer were making this work. Then again, why wouldn't it?

It had been a little over a month since the two of you had made things official. And truthfully, you were almost surprised by how this was Spencer’s first relationship. To you, your boyfriend was a walking daydream. And today would only prove your point further.

Having meals at odd times together wasn't something your relationship was new too. In fact, it was what it was built on. Early mornings like these or late nights together were filled with food, conversation, and smiles.

The dark morning sky is untouched by the light of the sun. The chill is apparent by the fog that leaves your mouth once you see the car pull up. You smile and wait patiently for Spencer, who’s being driven by Derek from the BAU.

Soon you're lost in his embrace. His face is buried in your neck and his arms are around your body. Kisses are planted on lips and cheeks.

“Hi.” You greet each other with cheesy grins before entering the restaurant hand in hand.

The sound of a loud horn stops the two of you in your tracks.

“Forgetting something, pretty boy?” follows it.

You turn your head to find Derek’s car still in the parking lot before looking to Spencer confused. Your brows pull together, and a small smile brightens your face.

“Pretty boy?” You question with a heightened voice.

He looks at you for an unfortunately short-lived moment. Searching your eyes as he questions himself on why hearing that name from your lips felt so different. It was on the better end of the nicknames the BAU’s boy wonder had been given but hearing it from Derek was nothing like hearing it from you.

Again he honks.

“Come on, pretty boy.” You gestured towards the car.

Before the night of Spencer’s birthday, you knew of Derek through various sources. All of them being women. The built, thick browed man was friendly to say the least. But from everything Spencer had told you, that wasn't all he was. Derek Morgan was family focused, hardworking and Spencer’s best friend.

“Look who it is.” He exclaimed, leaving the driver side.

Your name left Derek’s mouth with little to no resistance. Ironic , considering that this was only the third time you’d spoken to the man. Once the night you met Spencer and the other when you’d gotten that postcard.

“Derek Morgan, the man I’ve heard so much about.”

“Oh Spencer, don't tell me you're spending your all time with this dime piece talking about little ol me.” His hands come to his chest, and he looks at Spencer.

“You come up from time to time.” You're quick to say with a shrug, forcing his attention on you.

“I wish I could say the same about you. But you're an everyday topic when it comes to this one.”

Spencer flashes Derek a look before his eyes meet yours.

“Is that so?”

Spencer’s deep brown eyes hold your gaze. Striking it dares him. His lips part yet can't seem to move further than that. Unsure what to say, he’s silent. Scared to confirm, scared to deny.

That's how Spencer stays when you and Derek exchange goodbyes and possibly empty promises of meeting again over drinks.

Inside, Spencer is still quiet while you scan the local dinner menu. Sitting across from each other in the booth window seat, you contemplated what to order. A sub sandwich seemed good, but all day breakfast was hard to pass on. Especially for the dark coffee, heavy sugar addict you called your boyfriend.

When the waitress arrives, you order a platter to less than likely split with Spencer. Who goes with coffee and a donut. His favorite, of course, chocolate icing with sprinkles.

As always, conversation filled the air between Spencer and you. Although it starts light, you had a few things on your mind that could quickly turn it heavy. Questions specifically. Ones that’ve been on your mind for a minute.

You thought back to half an hour ago, Derek saying your name with ease. Telling you how Spencer had turned you into an “everyday topic” at work. Then your mind went to the night at the BAU.

“This is her?”

You remember Diana's voice.

The tall older blonde woman had a mixed expression when she saw you that night. Her face half surprised and half proud almost. A stark contrast to Spencer's concern riddled face.

You tried not to think about it too often, when you did it ended in unnecessary overthinking. Wondering again and again what Spencer could have told his mother. What about other people, coworkers and friends? Maybe Diana was just being nice. Covering up her real opinion because you were there in front of her. What did his mother think of you? What kind of first impression did you make ?

“Can I ask you a question?”

One of the most dangerous things to a relationship is a question. A question asking if you can ask a question, is even worse.

“Of course.”

He sounds so sweet saying it that you feel almost guilty for being scared to ask.

“Do you remember when I got that postcard and that guy with the deep voice called me?”

You hadn’t even gotten to the point, and already concern flairs in Spencer’s eyes. His soft expression turned sour. Knowing far more than you did on the Fisher king case.

What was just a postcard and scary call to you almost ended Elle’s life. As well as putting you and his mother in grave danger.

“When your mom saw me, she-” You smiled. “She called me beautiful.”

“You are.”

With just a blink, Spencer’s hardening work shell is gone. The corners of his lips curl at the sweet moment, regardless of its much darker background.

“She also said that you told her so much about me.”

He hesitates.

“I have.”

There’s a moment of silence. You held back your excitement, staying open to the idea that not all of what he told her was good.

“So…” you cut through the silence. “What did you tell her about me ?”

He's silent again. His cheeks are quick to color. A slight pink started to take over his face.

“Just a few things.” He takes a sip of his coffee. “Your name, what you look like, how we met and… how I feel about you.”

With your lips pressed together, you nod slowly at Spencer’s rather vague answer. You accept his response for now but know that soon you’d be digging for more.

The platter arrives and you waste no time. Cutting up the soft, large pancake syrup covers half the plate. With a plastic fork, you stab a piece and bring it to your mouth. Content, you sigh as you chew.

“Want some?” you offer Spencer, aware you’d be receiving a “No” in exchange.

“No, thank you.”

He attempts to politely decline, but when it came to sharing, “No” isn't an answer you welcomed.

With a new fork, you picked up a cut up piece of pancake and brought it to Spencer’s lips. He doesn't hesitate to open his mouth and take the piece with a small “Thank you.”.

“You're welcome. I need you eating more than bad coffee and sugar.”

“Considering how much syrup I’ve seen you use, I think we both have a sugar problem.”

You scoff playfully before laughing and taking another bite.

“I never said you had a problem with Sugar. I’d just prefer to see you eat more creatively.”

His brows pinch together. Creatively? Spencer questioned what you meant.

“Like what?”

A sly smile corners one end of your mouth.

“I got a few things you could eat.” you joke with an unaware Spencer. “Just come back to mine, and we can have some breakfast in bed.”

He thinks on it for a minute while you eat. Taking a bite from his donut as well.

“That sounds messy. Eating in your bed or where you sleep can attract ants and cockroaches.” Spencer takes a more serious approach to your sexual suggestion.

Giving another piece of your breakfast to him, you use your free hand to caress his hand.

“That’s not what I meant.” your soft voice and lustful eyes clarify.

Spencer's burning cheeks began to glow a brighter pink. He tries to hide his excitement at the thought but fails miserably. Instead, he hides his smile behind sips of coffee.

With a half empty plate turned to go box, you drove the two of you to your home. After long hours at work you were spent and so was Spencer. The two of you share a hot shower, change into pajamas and crawl into bed together.

The perfect time to bring up your previous question. Turning to face Spencer, he looks up from his book to find you staring with a curious expression.

“Hmm?”

“So what exactly did you tell your mom about me ? Like how did the phone call start?”

“It wasn't a call. I write to my mom daily.”

“Daily?” you said, skeptical.

“Yea… she-”

He holds himself back, unsure how much or little to reveal of his mother and her past. Spencer had few people in his close circle, and prior to the fisher king case, the majority of them knew nothing about Diana.

But you weren't a coworker or close friend even. You were his partner now.

He clears his throat and sits more upright. Spencer swallows and begins to speak again.

“My mom, she lives in a home in Vegas. Where I was born and grew up. She enjoys reading and work is complicated, so letters are easier. Especially when it comes to photos.”

You smile.

“That's so sweet.”

Spencer did not agree. In all honesty, the “sweet” gesture wasn’t too sweet. He used writing to her daily as a way to make up for the lack of calls and in person visits. Along with putting her in that home to being with.

Not wanting to dwell on the topic of his mother too long, Spencer got straight to the point.

“Which letter do you want to know about ?”

“All of them! There’s more than one about me ?”

“There’s several.” He admits quietly.

With a shocked smile, you thought hard on whether this was something you really wanted to know. Realistically, it could be anything, but it was unlikely Spencer would tell you the bad things. If there were any.

“Okay, I wanna know about one. You can choose, but I want all the details. I know that big brain remembers, so no excuses.”

Spencer needed no time to prepare, he knows the once you’d like to hear.

“The one I have in mind is rather long.”

“Paraphrase then, pretty boy, and make it good.”

“Okay.” he started. “It was a few days prior to me asking you out. I was nervous, to say the least. Worried about a multitude of things. And she suggested that I think of something I enjoy, then think of you and find a connection. And so I did.”

He recalls the many papers, pages upon pages of awful handwriting and distressed words.

“What connection did you find?”

“I thought of reading, then thought of you, and I was reminded of a quote. “There is no gift so holy as is the gift of love, nor anything so much to be desired as love, for love may gain what it desires.”.” he quotes it perfectly. “I realized my desire to be with you was and is much larger than any worry or fear I might have surrounding… us.”

You were both silent for a minute. You weren't expecting to hear something so heavy. It was strange in a way. Not uncomfortable or uneasy in any way, but new.

“Who’s that quote by?” you asked, curious.

Out of the long names of authors Spencer adored, which one was the maker of such raw words.

“Margery Kempe.” he replied with confidence and a twinkle in his eye. “My mother’s favorite writer.”

Next chapter – 14 – Drunk words, sober thoughts All chapters – 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, My full masterlist

#wmbw #bwwm #spencer reid x black reader #spencer x reader #spencer reid #black fem reader #mjlovescm #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x black!reader #black!reader #criminal minds

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