You seem really new to tumblr, so as one person with daily chronic pain to another, please don't blaze your posts about it. Blaze puts it on completely random people's dashboards, and many tumblr users are unthinkingly hostile to blazed posts no matter what they're about. You could end up getting some really nasty ableists on your posts and in your asks. Search tags for things relevant to you and follow blogs from there. And for the love of god, turn off anonymous asks in your settings.

Thank you for the advice! I appreciate it.

Hey I saw your post because of blaze or whatever and you remind me of one of my friends who had cripplingly painful arthritis in her knees and was in the scenario you’re in and I know it’s probably not worth a lot but I care and I’m sorry for your pain

Thank you, it means a lot.

Dealing with Pain

How does one get through a day when all they feel is physical pain which leads to emotional pain. Each day is a challenge. Each day is like hell. Somedays are better than others. Not that there is a day without pain, just some days are less torturous than others. I smoke to try to ease the pain but then I start to feel useless because I can don't much when I am high. If I try, it is usually messed up. So that means more physical pain from trying, and emotional from failing. Sometimes, more often than not, I feel like this is Hell. The doctors can't figure out what's causing it, but for a blessing, they found at least one way to take away the pain for a few weeks, but then I can't get another shot for 6 months, so 4 months of torture. Some days I am so depressed that I don't even want to get out of bed because I know how much it is going to hurt. I feel like no one around me really understands what I am going through, how it effects me. Those I love try their best to help, but I know they don't understand, their bodies aren't fighting against them. Is there anyone out there who knows how it feels to want to give up each day but are too damn stubborn to quiet so they keep on going, battling through everyday until finally, finally, peaceful sleep comes and everything disappears for too short of a time, but at least there is no pain. It's like cold water on a sunburn. Yeah, it will help it for a little while, but the pain is going to come back and worse. That's how the treatment, rather it be shots, weed or sleep, feels like. I feel like I am battling my way through Hell until the day He calls me Home.