eventually you realize you don’t want to die. you just don’t want to live the life you’re living. and slowly you try to create a life you want to live. just gotta start there.

Several Sentences Sunday!!

Tagged by @tizniz @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @thekristen999 @wikiangela @theotherbuckley all of whom shared AMAZING STUFF y'all should show some love! 💜🩵

I think I've finished Eddie's second oh moment. As it stands, it's just going to be a feelings realization and open ending kinda thing. The end feels a little rushed at the moment so some editing is definitely needed. In the meantime, have way more than seven sentences:

“So what you remembered today made you come to some realizations?” Bobby guesses. “A little?” Eddie winces. “It's always been there, I think, I just… didn't know. That was the moment I realized it and I forgot, Bobby.” “Does the moment you realized it have any effect on the feeling?” Bobby asks. Eddie frowns in thought. It doesn't, of course it doesn't, but… “The feeling will always be there. I just… can't do anything about it now.” “Could you have back then? Would you have?” The gears in Eddie's head stop turning. Maybe that's what's bothering him about the whole thing. It's not the realization itself. It's not the fact he loves Buck. It's not the fact almost dying made him realize it. It's the fact he's been loving Buck for years and hasn't ever told him. Not in so many words. He knows he didn't get his point across telling Buck about the will. He knows. But dammit, he was terrified. Still is. That if he takes that chance- if he decides to tell Buck and Buck doesn't feel the same- he knows he'll never recover. When he thought he could never be an option to Buck, it was manageable. He could love Buck in his quiet way, resigned to the fact he'll always be just the best friend. Now it's not impossible. And yet, at the same time, it is. Because Buck wants Tommy. Buck is happy with Tommy. They go on dates and out dancing and Tommy comes along for movie nights and the other day Buck mentioned Tommy has a drawer at the loft and- And Eddie is still standing where he's always been. Just out of reach of what he wants. What he's never allowed himself to have. What he won't ever allow himself to have if it means keeping Buck as happy as he's been since meeting Tommy.

Absolutely no pressure tagging (and let me know if you want to be added/ removed):

@13shadesofanni @lover-of-mine @monsterrae1 @loveyouanyway @kitteneddiediaz

@daffi-990 @exhuastedpigeon @spagheddiediaz @steadfastsaturnsrings @ronordmann

@actuallyitsellie @wildlife4life @fortheloveofbuddie @bidisasterevankinard @rainbow-nerdss @diazsdimples @hippolotamus

@likeamollusconarock @smallandalmosthonest @jshadow01 @shipperqueen6 @idealuk @lunarspark-cos

@lin27 @misshiss727 @weareallstoriesintheend11 @orangeboxfox92 @daniwib and anyone else who wants to share!! 🥰🩷

if we don't get a proper madney kiss this episode, i'm gonna do Something. you have been warned

love me anyway | i love you anyway

@lgbtqcreators // creator bingo – overlay

+

Buck and Tommy | 7x04

@pscentral event 26: minimalism @lgbtqcreators creator bingo: typography

♡ countdown to the madney wedding ♡ (4 days) ↳ 4.08: breaking point

The secret wish is to write a fanfic that someone loves so much they make fan art of it, or to create a drawing that someone creates an entire fic based off of it.

you're my future, baby

bucktommy rating: T words: 7.2k summary: Buck and Tommy have a conversation about their future together.

[read on Ao3]

In Buck's defense, he doesn’t mean to ask this question right then. It just slips out. He's lying in the big, strong arms of his very hot, amazing boyfriend, both sweaty and still breathless. He’s blissed out and fucked out, and so content and still dizzy after a mindblowing orgasm. So he doesn’t have a lot of control over his thoughts and words right now. So he surprises even himself when the question flies out of him. “Do you want to have children?” he asks casually, absentmindedly playing with their intertwined fingers where they’re splayed on his chest, as he lays on his back, Tommy pressed to his side. “What?” Tommy asks, surprise and even shock evident in his voice, and only then Buck realizes what he said, and he feels his eyes widen and face starts to burn, and he stares at the ceiling, but feels Tommy’s gaze on the side of his head. “I- I- I mean, like ever, some day, down the line- not like- I mean, you know, I- I just thought we should talk about it if- if- if it’s going where I hope it’s going- because I- we’ve been together for a while and I hope that- I think I-” he starts rambling and stumbling over his words, panicking just a little bit. Fuck, they’ve been doing so good the past few months, it’s honestly his best relationship he’s been in, and now he goes and screws it up by being too much, too soon, too serious- “Sorry, this is fast, I probably just freaked you out, sorry-” “Evan.” Tommy’s free hand lands on his cheek, and he gently turns Buck’s head towards himself. He meets Tommy’s soft gaze, and relaxes a little instantly. Tommy doesn’t look freaked out, just surprised, but there’s a hint of a smile dancing on his lips. “Hey, it’s okay. You just surprised me a little, that’s all. None of my relationships really got to the stage of talking about it, and if I tried, they freaked out. So I didn’t want to bring it up too soon, but you’re right, it is something to discuss. What spurred this on right now?” he asks, thumb gently moving along Buck’s cheek.

[read on Ao3]

Several Sentence Sunday ⭐️

Tagged by @smilingbuckley, @theotherbuckley, & @perfectlysunny02 🩵

My focus has fully been on Recovery, which just broke 15K, and it's more or less become a self indulgent fic for me (and Maggie), but if anyone is interested, here's some of that!

Cracking the door open, Buck pushes it until he can see the bed. The blankets are rumbled and disturbed, but there’s no one laying there. Panic surges in Buck’s chest for a split second as his eyes dart around the room until he finds Eddie standing over by the window. Buck sags against the doorframe, taking in the way Eddie’s arms are wrapped tightly around himself, gazing out through the blinds and onto the dark and empty street. It reminds Buck of when he had walked out of Christopher’s room after Eddie’s breakdown, when Eddie had stood in a similar stance, fretting over his son. The parallel makes Buck’s heart ache. “He’s gone then?” Eddie’s voice is ragged sounding from almost complete disuse during the day. He doesn’t turn to look at Buck, simply stares out the window. “He’s going to stay with Hen and Karen for a few days.” Buck explains, “But Eddie, he wasn’t scared of you. He’s scared for you.” Eddie shakes his head quickly, pushing himself away from the mall and turning to face Buck. The streetlights cast shadows on his face, emphasizing the haunted expression on Eddie’s face. “He should be scared of me!”

NP tagging: @hippolotamus, @actualalligator, @actuallyitsellie, @bidisasterevankinard, @spotsandsocks, @fortheloveofbuddie, @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove, @daffi-990, @jesuisici33, @cal-daisies-and-briars, @exhuastedpigeon, @theplaceyoustillrememberdreaming, @monsterrae1, @epicbuddieficrecs, @elvensorceress, @eddiebuckley-diaz, @eddiebabygirldiaz, @wildlife4life, @evanbegins, @devirnis, @loveyouanyway, @watchyourbuck, @loserdiaz, @excuseme-greentea, @wikiangela, @scknight05, @dangerpronebuddie, @kitteneddiediaz, @incorrect9-1-1, @underwaterninja13, @bigfootsmom, @evaneds, @thekristen999, & @princessfbi (because I’m needy for your stuff and you’ll also tag Mads and make them right hehe)

Buddie "wish I could carry you in my pocket"

"Wish I could carry you around in my pocket," Buck sighs as he gazes lovingly at Eddie sitting on the kitchen table. He's just a little too short for his legs to touch the ground, so he's got his ankles hooked together as he swings his legs back and forth. That, plus the oversized hoodie he's wearing have the effect of making him look like an overgrown toddler and Buck thinks he is simply adorable.

The minute the words leave his lips, Buck has an idea. A year or so ago, Buck had been messing around with one of Maddie's old spellbooks when he'd come across a Shrinking Spell. Thinking it would be useful if he ever needed to pull someone out of a mound of rubble or remove a crush, Buck had learned the spell, accidentally shrinking Maddie's laptop before figured out the reversing spell and had put it to right.

"Hmm?" Eddie says, lifting his eyes ever so slightly from the cookbook he's studying. "What was that, baby?"

Buck rolls up his sleeves and flexes his fingers a little. "Oh nothing, don't mind me." He clicks his fingers and looks pleased as a small shower of blue sparks rain onto the hardwood floors. There's a very faint smell of sea salt, but hopefully not enough for Eddie to notice. "Hold still."

"Wha-?"

Eddie barely has a moment to register Buck's words before Buck does a series of complicated wiggles with his fingers, mutters "Parvus" under his breath, and Eddie is suddenly shrouded in a cloud of royal blue energy. The room is suddenly filled with the scent of the ocean, as if Buck has suddenly stepped out onto Santa Monica beach.

When the cloud clears Eddie is nowhere to be seen, and Buck's heart is instantly in his throat.

"Eddie?" he calls out, walking towards the table where his boyfriend had been perched moments earlier. "Eddie are you still here?"

I've fucking disappeared my boyfriend, Buck thinks in a moment's panic. He hadn't read anything in the fine print about performing the spell on performing it on human subjects, and he's also not sure how to control the size of the thing he's transforming. There is a very real possibility that he's shrunk Eddie to the size of a dust mite and will never be able to resize him again.

Why the fuck can't he use his brain before acting??

Just before Buck plummets into a proper panic attack, there's a small movement on the table, just behind the cookbook resting on the edge.

"Buck, what the fuck have you done to me?"

The voice is high pitched and quiet but unmistakably Eddie's, and it takes Buck a second to locate it. But there, dusting himself off and looking decidedly unimpressed, is the smallest Eddie Buck has ever seen in his life. He's about the size of Buck's forefinger and leans against the pages of the cookbook as he glares up at his boyfriend.

"Oh my god, you are so tiny!" Buck grins as he takes in Eddie in all his miniscule glory. "I can't believe that worked!"

Buck reaches out and picks Eddie up, his fingers pinching at the back of Eddie's hoodie, and he drops his boyfriend into the palm of his hand. Eddie wobbles unsteadily before gingerly lowering himself down so he's sitting on the edge of Buck's palm with his legs dangling over the edge, no dissimilar to how he was on the table. He crosses his arms across his chest and glares up at Buck. If he wasn't all of 3 inches tall, it would almost be intimidating

"Put me back," he demands, the authoritativeness of his tone lost entirely by the fact that he sounds like he's swallowed a tank of helium. "Put me back or so help me God-"

"Or what?" Buck giggles, "You'll crawl up my nose?"

"I'll squeeze inside your dickhole and cause permanent damage with my teeth and fists," Eddie counters with a huff.

"Don't threaten me with a good time, babe."

"Buck please, we've got a shift in 3 hours. Make me big again," Eddie pleads, and Buck's completely incapable of defying his boyfriend at the best of times, especially when he's perched perfectly in the palm of Buck's hands, looking so tiny and adorable and pleading silently with his big brown eyes.

Buck sighs and holds his palm adjacent to the table so Eddie can walk across it and take up position next to the cookbook.

"Can I at least try fitting you in my pocket?" he asks, giving Eddie his puppy eyes, but it seems Shrunk Eddie is immune to Buck's charms. He shakes his head vehemently, snapping his fingers so a ball of deep green energy appears in the palm of his hands. The mellow, woodsy scent of pine trees cuts through the saltiness of Buck's magic as Eddie juggles the energy ball between his hands.

"Try it, I dare you."

Knowing when he's beaten, Buck relents with a sigh. Buck may be the one that practices magic the most but Eddie comes from a long line of powerful sorcerers, and Buck has no trouble admitting that Eddie is the more skilled magician of the two of them. If Eddie wanted to, he could turn Buck into a cockroach in a matter of seconds.

"Magnus" he mutters, channelling a fraction of his energy towards Eddie, and there's another cloud of rich blue energy and Eddie reappears.

He shakes out his arms and hops off the table. "You have no idea how weird that was," he grimaces. "You looked like a giant!"

"Don't I always?" Buck teases, referencing his slight height advantage against Eddie which was a slight sore point in their relationship.

Eddie takes two steps forward so they're nose to nose, and is about to open his mouth to scold Buck before a look of surprise passes over his face.

"Huh!" he says, stepping back so he's able to look at Buck properly. A grin begins to spread over his face as he looks Buck up and down. "I think that spell made me taller!"

Buck balks. "Absolutely not, that's not possible," he says, shaking his head. "I'm the tall one!"

Eddie steps back into Buck's space and yep, he's definitely grown an inch or two. They're almost completely at eye level, with Eddie a fraction taller, if anything. Buck gulps. Maybe he shouldn't have played around with magic.

"No, baby, you're definitely shorter than me no," he grins, and he tilts Buck's chin up (up!!!) to kiss him. It's soft and sweet, their lips moving in tandem. Eddie's smiling into the kiss and Buck can feel the smugness radiating off him.

"I'll just have to shrink you again," he points out as they break apart, but Eddie merely grins and kisses Buck on the forehead.

"I'd like to see you try."

Send me a ship and a sentence and I'll finish it!!

bi buck fic my beloved 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

Hi, Nolan 💖 Ack! I’m so glad you love Bi Buck. He’s very special to me (as is his internal panic 😅) Your sentences:

The idea of being a bisexual man feels correct and right and good. Like a missing piece that’s slotted into place. The problem, one of them anyway, is expressing that out loud. Being able to actively state who he is instead of passively agreeing when someone asks if he’s bi.

And he knows he doesn’t need a label. Hen, Karen, Tommy and countless forums all remind him he doesn’t have to use one if he doesn’t want to. Except he thinks he would like to. Something to help him make sense of his thoughts, preferences, and feelings. To make him feel settled. Because, despite his recent revelations - more likely because of them - he’s been shaken up inside. Memories have started surfacing, dislodged from mental shelves and opening to precise moments he never gave a second thought to before.

in hindsight (tangled up with you all night)

15.7 | Explicit | Read on AO3

Summary:

“We’re gonna be stuck here for at least 5 months,” Buck said, his fingers tracing the bumps across Eddie’s back, the other man was nearly asleep, spent after going a few rounds in the hotel room, where they could be as loud as they wanted to be, “That’s a long time.” Eddie hummed, sighing as Buck kept touching him, relaxing further into the bed, Buck smiled and leaned over to place a kiss on his shoulder, not trying to start anything again, just a soft point of contact; Eddie smiled softly at the touch. “It is,” Eddie agreed. “Maybe we can keep doing this? Just this, it doesn’t need to be anything more,” Buck offered, he had learnt to not offer more than just sex, he had learnt that people didn’t want him for more than sex, and he was okay with it, he truly was. Especially in cases like this, shooting on site in a foreign country, people were usually just looking for an escape. Buck could offer that to Eddie. “Maybe,” Eddie replied, his hand reaching out to pinch the side of Buck’s hip, “Definitely maybe.” * Or as young actors Buck and Eddie fall into a FWB situation that develops into more, before walking away from the other. Years later they're given a second chance.

mint babybel wrapper rose <3

cookies and frolicking through the woods? yes omg when are u free? and jskdhf hmm maybe i should be a little more mean on here 😇

guess who made one of those ask game things :] yknow cause why not

you know the drill

Safe in your arms 🩷💜💙

Reblog for sample size (pls).

You guys really liked my last poll so