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longrangearcher · 6 days
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the ghost of one specific homosexual cowboy regularly possesses Tumblr gays
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longrangearcher · 8 days
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I Hate Oranges
I hate oranges
The tough peel, the sticky juice
I hate that white pulp inside you have to remove to be able eat.
I hate how I need to dig my nails into the peel to open them
And how that stains my nail an almost yellow color
How the smell that sticks around no matter how many times I wash my hands.
And It's not even that I hate how oranges smell
it's just the fact that everything I try to eat after that smells just like oranges.
I don't know how someone could ever bring them every day
But still I sit here
Eating my orange scented sandwich
hoping you never learn to peel them
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longrangearcher · 9 days
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How are you?
How are you feeling?
As if sorrow himself hath thrown his poor self apon mine own heart and sobbed
Like I should stumble under the weight of this creature that squeezes around the tender and beating amalgamation of my life's blood, straining to keep me afloat
That's what I would say if I really tried to describe this weight in my chest
But it's not your fault nor your problem I'm so dramatic
I'm doing fine thanks for asking
How are you this fine day?
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longrangearcher · 10 days
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By LabradoriteKing on Pinterest
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longrangearcher · 13 days
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In this world it's just us, you know it's not the same as it was..
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longrangearcher · 13 days
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you’re my best friend.
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longrangearcher · 13 days
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Beautiful. Majestic. BAM!
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longrangearcher · 14 days
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Blimey.
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longrangearcher · 14 days
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ITS THE LAST STAND BABY!!!!!!!!
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longrangearcher · 14 days
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Beautiful. Majestic. BAM!
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longrangearcher · 19 days
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In Elias Hodge's mind, his attention (Anastasia Tension) is wasted on menial mundane tasks he doesn't care about, their potential wasted, while his impulses (Imelda Pulse) guides his hand for better or worse.
His curiosity (Hunch Curio) is stuck on the small things in life, craving money and questions. His conscience (Conrad Shintz) is considered childish, every other part of him trying to squash it down, framed as an inconvenience.
His hyperfixations (The Fix) keep straying to everything he abandoned in his childhood (the Orphanage), which he hates and refuses to treat those memories with any sort of kindness- bar one part of his mind which longs for kidness on the child he used to be.
His lust (Daniel Fucks) and pleasures are supressed, believing himself unworthy, and every time he is close to gratification he self destructs, punishing himself for not being enough.
Now there are little thoughts, tiny intrusions, that used to be quiet growing louder. He doesn't want to do bad, not really, but what does it matter anymore? If he can't let himself be happy, why not be malicious? He's not listening to his conscious anymore, his impulses and... something else has a control over him. His 'mental switchboard' is broken, so to speak, and certain parts of his brain are no longer able to communicate.
There is no predicting what that man, that horrifically smart man, might do.
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longrangearcher · 19 days
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me rn:
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longrangearcher · 20 days
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if Aabria Iyengar has 1000 fans I'm one of them
if Aabria Iyengar has 100 fans I'm one of them
if Aabria Iyengar has 10 fans I'm one of them
if Aabria Iyengar has 1 fan brennan lee mulligan has killed me.
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longrangearcher · 22 days
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the rat grinders timeline
after this last episode i feel like i need to clarify all of this so i can get an idea of what the scheme actually is. anyway:
pre-high school:
porter is a scion of the house of cliffbreaker, formerly the house of sunstone, who sought to take the name of ankarna and shift her divine domain from dawn and justice to war and conquest. the house expressed frustration with ankarna for not being willing to strike ruvina or cassandra and after the sundering of the cliffs of calcoth, went into hiding as the cliffbreakers.
porter is nominally a paladin of ankarna, but wishes to take her place as a deity of war and conquest, to be able to strike down cassandra and ruvina.
freshman year:
the high 5 heroes form on the first day of school: kipperlilly copperkettle, lucy frostblade, oisin hakinvar, ivy embra, ruben hopclap, mary ann skuttle.
that same day, the bad kids get detention and face down the corn cuties in the cafeteria. kristen and gorgug die and get brought back by aguefort. jace and porter are the first teachers on the scene; they are established as a duo. may have been attempting to install the rage crystals in kristen and gorgug.
kipperlilly notably doesn't like riz, and feels that the bad kids are getting special treatment. all of the rat grinders have animosity towards the mad kids in some manner.
the high 5 heroes take easy quests that they know they will succeed at.
kalina enters the spy's tongue curse with jace and porter, and is only able to talk about ragh because he was tangential
prompocalypse: kalvaxus falls. yes! is borne in the gym. crown of the nightmare king is stolen. ragh sees arianwen with kalina, then jace and porter and gets kalina transferred into his body via a lay on hands from porter.
sophomore year:
at some point, the high 5 heroes are brought in by jace and porter and start facing high level monsters after they are defeated by porter/jace, thus grinding them for xp.
name change from high 5 heroes to rat grinders--ivy, oisin, ruben, and mary ann for, kipperlilly and lucy against.
lucy is given an mcat for paladin classes so that she might become the champion of ankarna (old)
porter kills "lydia barkrock", likely seeking to release and/or destroy bakur
kalina splits off to raise the nightmare king again, with assistance from angwyn and arianwen abernant. she is defeated and thus unable to work with jace and porter for a time. the nightmare king is apparently integral to the raising of porter as a fetal deity; perhaps as an associated deity, the nightmare king would guide his ascension.
nightmare king is reconstituted as cassandra, championed by kristen applebees.
the rat grinders go on their own spring break quest to the mountains of chaos, presumably to visit the temple of the fallen sun. they are accompanied by jace stardiamond. they do not find the name of ankarna, but likely start establishing the teleportation circle.
after the quest, they are all implanted with the rage crystals and start manifesting more power and anger. this is presumably because they died. and were resurrected.
lucy goes back on the agreement and reaffirms her commitment to ruvina. she withdraws her change of deity paperwork. the rat grinders + porter kill her and bury her in the far haven woods.
porter has correspondence with bobby dawn about collaboration and the potential uses of devil's honey.
mazey phaedra is elected student body president and is given a faculty request to remove the inaugural period of following student body president from the bylaws
summer of the night yorb:
night yorb is released; the bad kids spend the summer chasing down the cult of the night yorb and building the solar lasso. they are out of elmville and generally focused on the red waste
church of sol/helioic church loses followers due to the long night
kipperlilly prepares to run for student body president
the rat grinders request buddy dawn as their replacement cleric
kipperlilly tracks down eugenia shadow and threatens to dig up her grave, after waiting until the first moment of her junior year
ruben writes “in space no one can hear you scream” and it becomes the song of the summer, outcompeting fig and the cig figs. he later writes "get mad!" with porter's advice
the loam family faces embezzlement charges wrt frosty fair and the location of frosty fair (the festival of frost) moves to the thistlespring tree
thistlespring tree is established as a root warden for elmville
the soil is laced with rage crystals
kvx bank changes from red to blue, signaling the presence of oisin's ancestor as their backer
junior year:
aguefort goes on holiday with ayda to the dawn of time (time quangle). gilear goes on holiday with hallariel. this leaves the school in the hands of grix, who was intended to eliminate threats to the school, and jace stardiamond as vice principal. the existing magical protections on the school are still present--they cannot kill mazey and elmville cannot be plane shifted while the AAA is in session.
kipperlilly begins campaigning only to be faced with the ineffable kristen applebees and her campaign manager, the ball
porter refuses gorgug's initial mcat request, hoping to incite rage in him
porter starts taking ambrosia to prepare his body for ascension, using rage to contain himself and not proceed to the afterlife.
the loam family is murdered and their case is dropped
cassandra comes to the astral plane and is trapped and killed. she remains in stasis, surrounding and protecting ankarna
fabian hosts the first party of the year: oisin starts setting his ping-pong ball traps and steals adaine's mephits in order to alter the cloud rider engine. ivy sees fig, transformed as lucy. the bad kids interact with buddy. ankarna pushes yes! through to kristen. gertie, who has been supplying the devil's honey, becomes nemeses with fabian
fig multiclasses as a paladin and is taught by porter--she is encouraged to rage, and pushed away from being a paladin of cassandra.
buddy is also encouraged to become a paladin and gets mcat paperwork
ruben performs at frosty faire and starts the ritual at the thistlespring tree--grix shows up to stop him and is defeated by the bad kids
yolanda badgood follows up with jace about lucy's death--she is brought to the far haven woods and killed. the bad kids find the bodies
the bad kids go to fallinel and find the name of ankarna on the ancient menhirs, and are faced with divine intervention from cassandra and galicaea, unbeknownst to the rat grinders.
they eliminate the curse of the armor of pride and remove bakur from lydia barkrock
fig writes dawn of justice and takes dominion of ankarna's original domain
bobby dawn fails kristen and sends the bad kids to the last stand
kristen catches kipperlilly killing buddy dawn during the last stand
buddy is raised by porter using a rage crystal
rat grinders go to ground, and prepare to go back to the temple of the fallen sun. constant nondetection from ruben, oisin, and possibly ivy
adaine catches jace stardiamond with a scrying into his office
bad kids do teacher evaluations: fig does porter & zara as one instead of two--this gives them the sacred scroll with the name of the intended deity written by the previous deity's champion. zara tells fig one was never submitted for her.
fig writes righteous rebel, makes her oath to ankarna, and releases both songs as singles that rocket up the charts
ruben sees wanda childa die
bad kids go to the temple of the fallen sun and investigate. fig is vindicated about porter.
fig gives the false name (bacharath) to porter and he stuns her in the hall
riz gets into his office and figures out the ascension scheme
the bad kids go to ruben's house and go through the rat grinders' plans
election night: the storm is triggered, the plans for seacaster manor are triggered; cloud rider engine is set and the enchanted ping-pong balls go off. they plan to have oisin's ancestor strike down the bad kids as they make ready to transport elmville during graduation.
the ritual
the ritual is centered on aguefort adventuring academy and requires certain things:
the location where a god was borne (the gym)
the ascending deity (porter), who is a champion of the new domain and has a body prepared for ascension
mortal followers seeking to change the domain/raise ankarna (the rat grinders + jace)
divine attributes of the deity (hammer, armor, etc.)
the writing of the name of the fetal deity on sacred scrolls by the champion of the old deity (fig)
the physical divine domain (elmville, suffused with rage crystals and transported to the astral realm), which requires the removal of the protections on the town that were cast by aguefort
the metaphorical divine domain (ruben's song get mad)
the nightmare king, as an associated deity and the one who would nurture the new deity
and the name of the old deity (ankarna) that they might sunder it and in her image make a new god
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longrangearcher · 24 days
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The "if she's the Elven Oracle why didn't she see this coming" joke constantly coming back to bite Adaine in the ass might be the evilest thing Brennan has ever done.
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