Last Seen Blogs
lands-rover-group
Lands Rover Engineers
grumpyaera
A e r a🌸
miniaturetyrantqueen
Untitled
boredandmedicated
I’m just kind of over it to be honest
richardsikendaily
Richard Siken Quotes
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growing up I was always afraid of being Found Out. not sure what I was hiding. just my whole self I guess
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love having covid and everyone finally starts to care by forcing me to eat
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fuck why is it every time i have to eat at a restaurant, i literally gain 5 pounds. i barely ate most of the meal, yet i have to suffer this much? i just came off a 12 day fast to this shit
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My god I can’t even tell you how thrilling it is to hear my mom ask me if I’m eating because I’m loosing more weight, my coworker looked at me and goes “you’re so TINY omg!!” And my boyfriend is able to wrap his hands around my waist with ease!
I’ve been feeling shitty because I feel like I haven’t been losing more weight but apparently I am, I just haven’t weighed myself in a while…
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08/14/22 progress photo. finally hit 160s today! haven’t noticed the difference since last update until now. i can barely keep my new clothes on me because i drop half a size every two weeks. on a road trip with a friend right now and she noticed the 20 pound loss since i saw her a month ago. people noticing feels weird, especially after not hearing good things about my body for so long. also have gotten comments on how my face bone structure is very prominent now, wonder what i’ll hear after hitting my goal weight. my mom saw this picture and immediately said stop losing weight, i guess i’ll be hearing this for a while now. 50lbs to go! consistency is everything
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self isolating to cope is great until you look up one day and years have passed and you realise no one knew you when you were 18 or 19 or 20 or 21 and now they never will
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I’m already making the call that August will be all of our months. With discipline, self control, and consistency, anything is possible 🧘🏼♀️🌷
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making a list of my reasons to keep going so i don’t chicken out this time
jawline
cheekbones
collarbones
getting piggyback rides
people being able to lift you
being able to share clothes
boys will finally look at me
the lack of face fat will make my nose look skinnier and my eyes/lips look bigger
not being embarrassed to go shopping with my friends
being able to wear makeup and cute clothes without looking like a failure that’s trying too hard
finally suiting my height so i’ll be seen as short and cute instead of stubby and chubby
being prettier than all the other girls in my family
sex
not being scared of yearly doctor’s appointments
bikinis
crop tops
shorts
form fitting clothing in general
jewelry finally looking cute instead of awkward on me
rings fitting without looking like they’re stuck
shaving taking half the time
showers overall being less stressful
being able to look in a mirror
finally being one of the pretty ones at school
being hot by the time i get to college
the idea of people wanting to see me naked
being fucked instead of killed in fuck marry kill for once
or even just married
anything but killed honestly
being able to eat in front of people without looking like a fat pig
people thinking i’m cutely awkward when i’m uncoordinated and bad at sports instead of thinking i’m a lazy fat bitch
getting genuine compliments instead of desperate straight-up-lie compliments girls say to you to be nice when you compliment them
people finally wanting to be my friend instead of being ashamed to be near the ugly fat bitch
finally knowing my clothing size
not getting marks on my stomach from my jeans being too tight
being able to be in photos without looking ugly and disgusting
skinny hands
nail polish actually looking good on me bc my hands won’t be gross looking
going into dressing rooms with friends
not being embarrassed of telling my friends my bra size bc the band number won’t be fucking huge
not looking noticeably bulky when i wear baggy clothes
will be adding to this whenever i think of something new lol
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it’s as simple as not eating.
really, it is.
the only thing that is standing in front of you and finally being able to live your life in a body that you love is completely in your control… so act like it.
if you’re tired of living in a fat person’s body, then stop eating like a fat person.
go take a nap, go read, go scroll. you can do anything you want as long as your are not adding unnecessary calories and fat onto your body.
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Self harm doesn’t always happen when a blade touches skin.
It’s skipping meals because you don’t feel like you deserve to eat today. It’s having sex because you want to be used or abused or defiled. It’s drinking recklessly because you might have the ‘courage’ do something stupid. It’s smoking - not because you need the nicotine - because you know it’s bad for you. It’s banging your head against a wall when you’re angry. It’s crossing the road without looking because you lowkey hope a car might hit you. It’s thinking about all the ways you could break a bone and make it look like an accident. It’s not taking painkillers because you want to suffer. It’s taking painkillers in excess because you know it’s dangerous. It’s walking home the more dangerous way because you’re kind of half hoping you’ll get attacked or raped or stabbed. It’s going for long walks at night and getting chilled to the bone and hoping that you get lost so that you can’t find your way back. It’s seeking out triggering material. It’s all the stupid little ways you punish yourself for existing.
Sometimes self harm happens when you put effort into depriving yourself of things you like or need, and sometimes it happens when you don’t put any effort into doing the things you like or need.
It’s a pattern of self-destructive behaviour, and it doesn’t only happen in one way.
This sort of behavior is classified as “para-suicidal” It’s putting yourself in a situation of danger or destruction with the intention of risking your safety rather than a direct attempt on your life. Kind of, leaving it all to chance? Also doing things to harm yourself or your self worth because you feel you deserve to feel the outcome of those actions.
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my mutuals and i praying that july will be the month we miraculously lose 30 lbs:
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Im starving because....
• I hate the feeling of my thighs touching
• I hate the way my stomach looks
• I hate how my legs look in skirts
• I hate how big my arms look
• I can't look in the mirror without feeling disgusted by what I see
• I hate feeling self conscious about how my body looks when I go out
• I hate how huge my hips look in any style of jeans
• I hate feeling insecure next to my skinny friends
• I hate my every single fat on my body
• I hate that overthink every movement I make, to make sure no one notices how fat I am
• I'm tried of bring fat and gross
• I worry ill never lose weight if I do eat
....
I'm starving because I want to be pretty
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