leal-love-lace
Life n Shit
Bi.
Not putting up with any shit.
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Poetry Sprouts In April
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eye contact with someone you find attractive is so ungodly like you have no idea what you've done to me you bastard
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"ao3 should have an algorithm" ao3 should continue only giving me exactly what I ask for which happens because I know how to use the search, sort, and filter functions
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weird unprompted opinion but i think out of all the storytelling mediums.....theatre best portrays loneliness
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i just wanna within a cave with my friends and read poetry. is that too much to ask for?
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I made my 'little' gambler's page doll now I've prepared his blog for summer ! :^3
Also did this comparison size for fun (160cm - 200cm - 170cm)
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My parents are both pastors and once I was fucking this one dude who’s dad was the pastor of the rival church and he whispered ‘talk biblical to me’ so i started reciting Psalms 23 and we ended up getting into a competition of who could recite the most bible versus before they cummed
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Bruce, sitting at the dining room table, surprised and happy all his kids are there for dinner, bursting with love: Hn.
His kids: :)
Bruce goes to take a bite of his chicken. When he cuts into it, a great burst of Cheeto dust blows out into his face.
Bruce:
His kids: :)
Bruce: Okay. I see that it's time for retaliation.
—
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Bruce, sitting down to dinner a week later: Good evening, family.
His kids: >:-(
Bruce, cutting into his nicely cooked chicken: :)
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*Batkids being kidnaped (as civilians) and threatened with death*
Tim: I see you have only dug three graves, yet there more of us
Random Goon: Obviously you guys are going to share
Jason: I'm not sharing
Damian: If Todd doesn’t have to share neither do I
Dick: Nope. You're staying with me. So me and Dami, Jay, and Timmy and Cass, then we’ll have to dig another one-
Steph: Nope, I'm sharing with Cass
Duke: I think it's only fair if we get our own graves
Random Goon who is not paid enough to deal with the Wayne kids’ shit: *rubbing their temple* Forget it, we only need one grave and it's for me. Someone put me out of my misery
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[ After the Batkids destroyed the manor. ]
Jason: Anyone else have the weird urge to lecture themselves?
Jason, as Bruce: Jason, what are you doing?
Bruce, appearing from behind Jason: Jason, what are you doing?
Jason: I conjured him.
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the apples didn’t fall far from the trees or whatever
Super Sons #5
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No but let's talk about Bruce using gen-z slang in retaliation bc his kids thought it'd be funny to speak in codes around him. It horrifies everyone
Prime examples:
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Diana, explaining a battle strategy:
Bruce, nodding in agreement: So true, bestie
The JL, silent and disturbed:
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Dick, desperately trying to move Batcow away from his door: Why do you NEVER ground Damian?!
Bruce, sipping his coffee: He's my special baby girl
Dick, crying: STOP-
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Batman landing Tim his black card for his date with Bernard because he lost his: Don't let me catch you simping again
Tim:
Tim: I wish I was un-adopted
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Bruce, hand on Jason's shoulder, speaking sincerely and lovingly: I'm proud of the absolute sigma male, giga chad you've become
Jason:
Jason: *aiming a gun at Bruce with a trembling hand, Visibly holding back tears*
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Bruce: So, when you and Jason eventually get married-
Roy: We’re not dating?
Bruce:
Bruce: When the two of you get married, how likely do you think it is that you will change your last name to Wayne?
Roy: Jay doesn’t even use Wayne.
Bruce: *prolonged sigh*
Bruce: Yes, but have you considered how much it will annoy Ollie?
Roy:
Roy: Go on…
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Victor: Did you know Batman had contingency plans for every hero in the world?
Dick: …Yeah, I helped with some and have my own.
Teen Titans: WHAT!?
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Roy: I can’t believe both Bruce and Dick have contingency plans for us heroes, talk about mistrust, right Jay.
Jason: …
Outlaws: YOU DICK!
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Bart: I just heard Batman, Nightwing and Red Hood has contingency plans for all of us. Tim you gotta tell them that’s not right.
Tim: But I have the same plans and some extra if the first don’t work.
Young Justice: WHAT!?
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Birds of Prey: I’m glad you’re not part of Batman’s inner circle Oracle, turns out they have contingency plans for all of us. How can we trust someone who doesn’t trust us.
Oracle: But you trust me.
BoP: ARE YOU KIDDING US!?
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Jon: So you have plans I guess?
Damian: To take you all down? Of course, doesn’t everybody?
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Dick: Let’s just hug it out. Come on, hug it out.
The batkids: *struggle into a group hug*
Tim: Who took my wallet?
Jason: Sorry.
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Doodled a creecher at work today
#batfam#me n my sons#as tho tim isn't a pain in lexs ass anyways#n that jayson wont just shoot the guy#n dami wont stab him#dicks already crying tho so atleast a few heros n villains n assassins r already plotting his demise
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pov: you’re bruce wayne and you just allowed them to take the batmobile for a ride
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