when you realize cas never got a chance to see dean mourn him. to see what his death did to dean. how it broke him completely. SHATTERED. he never saw dean's utter despair. anger. complete hopelessness. he only ever saw dean's joy when he came back. and so cas figured that his death simply didn't affect dean all that much. that dean could be happy with Cas gone. that Dean could go on. Move on. cas never understood that this joy, this hope, this smile on dean's face after he came back was ONLY BECAUSE HE CAME BACK. CAME BACK TO DEAN.

Cas was the REASON.

season one of supernatual is so funny to me. sam and dean will literally show up to the crime scene in some fuck ass flannels and dean is in his leather jacket and the cops are like "who the hell are you?" and dean will be like "oh, us? well we are obviously from the us fish and wildlife service who else could we possibly be???" 

meanwhile theyre in the craziest outfits known to mankind with no badge or anything, so the cops will ask for their IDs and they'll hand them the most unconvincing fake id you'll ever see. the thing will be crumpled to no return and look like it was all hand written by a toddler and SOMEHOW THE COPS STILL BELIEVE THEM??

and then, they'll start questioning the victims family like "aw man :( I'm so sad for you :( that must be really hard :( so like what happened? and on a completely separate note, did you see anything? feel a temp drop? did you feel a cold spot? did you see something weird? like a creature mayhaps? like a ghost? did you see a ghost? do you believe in ghosts? please tell me it's a ghost?" like that's a totally normal line of questioning for a random drowning from two members of the us fish and wildlife service.

Companion piece to this Castiel (Sam & Jack: in progress!) :D

My art tag

Ask me a question/say hi/make a request

Rob: We got this question that we’ve been avoiding because it’s a lot of words. When Castiel is talking  to Dean in a truck about being human, the line that was aired is a different line that the script reads.

Ben Edlund: Sure.

Rob: So the line that aired is, Castiel says “I used to belong to much better club and now I’m powerless, I’m hapless , I’m hopeless, I mean, why the hell not bury myself in women and in decadence, right? It’s the end, baby, that’s what decadence is for. Why not bang a few gongs before the lights go out. But then, that’s just how I roll.” But the script reads “But instead we become this. The only thing, I think,  we have left, Dean and me, is each other. If Dean says it’s time to get out in the blaze of glory, win or loose, so be it. I’m in, but then, that’s just how I roll.” It’s just an interesting little difference.

Rich: Well somebody had to rewrite that, right?

Ben Edlund: Sure, I mean, like that was either a rewrite based on a note or something that- it’s possible that there was a shift in language that came from a pass through Kripke. To me that feels like a rewrite based on “ Ok, we know what the subtext is, bury is a little bit.” 

Rob: Gotcha.

Ben Edlund: Because, you know, it’s more interesting to know that an then have language kind of be less to the core. I mean, maybe not, sometimes you really want to go to that core.  But it didn’t seem necessary in that moment because look at the larger context. This guy is still hanging around. He’s going on a mission. And previously in the prior scene when he’s kind of like, when we used the word insouciant for the first and last time in Supernatural’s history. I believe, unless it gets quoted later in 15 seasons and I missed that. At that point he is totally ride or die with Dean. He’s basically “You say we a going on a suicide mission and there’s no hope or whatever” and Dean’s going “Yes, that’s what I’m saying” and he goes “Okay, let me go get the truck.” And so, in a sense, it was like- I would’ve done the same thing today. If that makes sense. Looking at the whole. 

Rob: I like the idea of burying it more and not serving it on a platter. Letting people- 

Ben Edlund: Mainly because all the other aspects of that story tell us that. Show us that, actually. That’s the whole thing. Show us, not tell us. I’ve heard that at some kind of seminar.

-Supernatural Then and Now podcast. BONUS CLIP: Ben Edlund Talks

art made for @mitskinaturalbang

I tried to capture the vibes of pink fluorescence on a hot summer night. The fic is a wonderful combination of sweet and sultry in its descriptions and I was hoping to capture that as well.

Read it here

Dean screaming at Sam: now you might be able to forget about that BUT I CAN'T!!!!!!!! is absolutely insane actually. because what was the reason other than to show how Dean's grief over Cas is DIFFERENT from Sam's???? what was the reason other than to highlight that Sam might be able to forget about it - because he lost a friend. While Dean CAN'T forget about it because he lost the love of his li -- [gunshots]

you know what really gets my goat?

13.6: Tombstone, done in charcoal for @stevebcks

Friend, knowing you this past year has actually genuinely changed me. I'm so grateful for your friendship I could go on about it forever (and will, for the rest of eternity) but for now, here's this piece art I'll give to you in September. Thank you for loving these idiots as much as I do, and for loving me as much as you do. I love you too much to say. I always say that all the fic I write is certainly in part for you, and that's true, but I don't do nearly as much art so this one's a touch more special.

I've been watching spn since high school but for some reason it took me this long to make actual art for it.

Hey……

(psychopomps)

big win for the girlies (gn) who like beelover!cas despite the haters

”Free will is a length of rope and God wants you to hang yourself with it” is such a RAW line for Cas to say like whoever wrote that sentence needs a Nobel prize for literature

Pornbots are so annoying like I’m not gonna fall for this I’m not an idiot I know sex isn’t real and its just something made up for destiel fanfiction

castiel came on the show balls and cock forward is the thing. his autistic swag and lustful eyes made him stare at dean 2 seconds too long and immediately the writers Understood

they had this poor hunter man stare at castiel's luscious lips for 12 damn years and in the end didnt even allow him to kiss those lips stupid 🙄 😒 😒