jadedanddark
Another Chapter
Part-time yang thief
786 posts
Last active 3 hours ago
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Last Seen Blogs
Text
Before I tell Prime that their subtitles have an error, it is very important to me that you guys get to see it before it is gone forever.
He WOULD fucking say that though.
1 note
·
View note
Text
Childe refers to seltzer as spicy water, which has dug into my vocabulary forever because it's ACCURATE.
the thing they dont tell you about working with little kids is it wrecks your vocabulary. you hear a kid phrase something bizarrely in a way only a 5 year old can and now any time you lose shit youre like "it dissed appear"
77K notes
·
View notes
Text
Why in the Sam Hill did nobody ask me this while I was at a con dressed as Cecil Palmer and working for the radio
I love those "asking cosplayers at a con what their day job is" videos because it's always like
*muffled voice issuing from a huge suit of armor* im a cybersecurity specialist
34K notes
·
View notes
Note
Update, Childe came up to me and asked me to wait while they thought through something, then babbled something at me. When I asked what that meant they said "nevermind, this is boring."
It was "good morning mother," but backward.
I'm so curious now because I saw you leave a comment that your kid may be a chageling and I can not figure out if it's a joke. if it is I feel very silly. if not it would be really cool if you shared some stories (providing ur comfortable)
Changeling, witch, second sighted, whatever word you want to put on it, Childe is spooky. Some incidents in no particular order:
While a baby, cats would follow us around while we went walking in the stroller. TWICE the cats (different cats) just jumped straight into the stroller and went to sleep.
Childe finds treasure. All the time. We have found multiple gold chains, a diamond ring, a fake diamond ring, drugs, and cash.
This story which they related to me with such confidence and casual vibes that they definitely knew the story very well.
Had someone they referred to as "Ghost Friend" for awhile. I thought it was an imaginary friend but details kept popping up like "we should decorate and get a cake, Tyler said he never had a birthday party." When I asked for more about Tyler, Childe pointed to the apartments across from us and said "he's from there." We had never spoken to anyone from that building.
While on that, Childe once woke up and sat up saying, "Who's that?" While looking out the window. We live on the second floor of our building, there is no access to that window from outside.
Repeated my grandmother's dying words to me, which apparently they had heard in a dream. (To confirm I wasn't just trying to make my memory fit what words, I told to my mom, who got really quiet and alarmed looking).
Kid plays 4D gender chess and I cannot keep up. Not necessarily a fairy thing but might as well be.
I tell stories pretty frequently, and was once requested to hear repeated "the one about the girl in her long white dress who wouldn't leave." The story? Janet and Tam Lin.
So they're you have it. We've long ago just accepted our spooky kid gonna spook, and just take it as it comes. I love Childe so much I could pop, and if the Good Neighbors come asking for their baby back, they're not going to like the answer.
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
So, uh. This was up on the wall at the mall. About twelve feet off the ground, behind a big column (I had to stand on tippy toes to get the pic).
To anyone worried about dystopian society, maybe you'll feel better once you've collected the full set of K9 unit trading cards.
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
woke up this morning, rolled over, and very confidently tried to blow out my alarm clock like a candle. absolutely no precedent for that.
129K notes
·
View notes
Text
We can hang out in my room if you--what, the pictures? They're just cool art, they really pull the room toget--uh, maybe I could just turn them to the wall--
being the token horror movie guy in the family is so hard. what do you mean you dont wanna watch the having a bad time movie? What? What do you mean its scary?
19K notes
·
View notes
Text
(VHS home video, REC dot in the corner)
Glad-One: F- A- Q stands for Frequently Asked Questions, not Quick As Flash and backward! It could also stand for Fluoride and Quinine to remind you about water additives!
(Camera scratch)
Glad-One: So you’ve got questions! That’s a good thing!
Sad-One: It means you probably haven’t got brain damage.
Glad-One: And here are the answers to questions that you, a passenger, statistically have!
(Camera scratch)
Glad-One: “How did I get here?”
Sad-One: Ask your parents.
Glad-One: It’s a great question!
(Camera scratch)
Glad-One: “How long will I be here?” Well that depends on you! Just don’t try to leave early, as train security cannot guarantee your safety off the train!
Sad-One: Or on it.
(Camera scratch)
Sad-One: “What are the Randalls?”
Glad-One: They are what kids today refer to as “wet,” or a “sloppy wet meow meow.”
Sad-One: They also say that about the Cat except they don’t.
Glad-One: Randall is wet! A good way to remember is the R stands for Really Damp!
Sad-One: It also stands for Randall.
Glad-One: The R in Really Damp stands for Randall!
(Camera scratch)
Glad-One: “Are those some kind of cockroach wolf?” Yes!
(Camera scratch)
Sad-One: “What am I supposed to do?” What are any of us supposed to do?
Glad-One: You are a passenger, so enjoy the ride! Learn life lessons, partake in some therapy without a therapist, and have some papaya shake!
Sad-One: If you can find the juice bar car.
Glad-One: Remember, when you get around, numbers go down! Probably!
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Shout out to Ginger Snaps (2000) for skidding to a halt in the middle of a gory horror movie to deliver a concise, non-judgemental, compassionate, informative rundown on what to expect from getting your first period. And then going directly back to the shredding. They were so right for that.
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
I've been reading 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea lately
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
I could be your ibuprofriend :).....or your advillain >:)
34K notes
·
View notes
Text
Man, is there anything more disappointing than the scary sound actually being just the wind. Like okay, I thought there might have been a demon or Godzilla or whatever. You got me. Moving air in the chimney. Fuck me I guess. Here I am primed and ready for a ghost and you give me low barometric pressure. I'm going to hunt meteorologists and keep them prisoner in the attic until they become the scary noises. God dammit. God dammit.
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ah, yes, the 28th of February. The last day of February. After which February will be over. No more February for another year. Of that I am certain.
6K notes
·
View notes
Note
I'm so curious now because I saw you leave a comment that your kid may be a chageling and I can not figure out if it's a joke. if it is I feel very silly. if not it would be really cool if you shared some stories (providing ur comfortable)
Changeling, witch, second sighted, whatever word you want to put on it, Childe is spooky. Some incidents in no particular order:
While a baby, cats would follow us around while we went walking in the stroller. TWICE the cats (different cats) just jumped straight into the stroller and went to sleep.
Childe finds treasure. All the time. We have found multiple gold chains, a diamond ring, a fake diamond ring, drugs, and cash.
This story which they related to me with such confidence and casual vibes that they definitely knew the story very well.
Had someone they referred to as "Ghost Friend" for awhile. I thought it was an imaginary friend but details kept popping up like "we should decorate and get a cake, Tyler said he never had a birthday party." When I asked for more about Tyler, Childe pointed to the apartments across from us and said "he's from there." We had never spoken to anyone from that building.
While on that, Childe once woke up and sat up saying, "Who's that?" While looking out the window. We live on the second floor of our building, there is no access to that window from outside.
Repeated my grandmother's dying words to me, which apparently they had heard in a dream. (To confirm I wasn't just trying to make my memory fit what words, I told to my mom, who got really quiet and alarmed looking).
Kid plays 4D gender chess and I cannot keep up. Not necessarily a fairy thing but might as well be.
I tell stories pretty frequently, and was once requested to hear repeated "the one about the girl in her long white dress who wouldn't leave." The story? Janet and Tam Lin.
So they're you have it. We've long ago just accepted our spooky kid gonna spook, and just take it as it comes. I love Childe so much I could pop, and if the Good Neighbors come asking for their baby back, they're not going to like the answer.
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
0 notes