My facade

Not all people have the luxury to be happy and loved. I'm........just one of those unlucky people that don't have the luxury. I'm just there to be used then thrown away for people's selfish desires. To be forever their puppet and forced to always be alone. Even if I had the option to love or be loved, all I can do is sit there in pain and force them away. To never let them see past the face I put up on display. Even so all I can do is say "I'm okay." but honestly I feel like a cracked vase on the verge of collapsing and spilling out every thing held inside. The funny thing is all I feel I can do is try and rely on my store bought super glue to hold me together. Do you know what the super glue is? Its me telling myself everyday that its going to be okay. That people need you. It takes everything out of me to not break my composure and just let it all go. I go to bed exhausted and wake every morning with less in me then the day before, but just to turn around to the mirror next to my bed and apply my face. Not the normal kind of let me put on my makeup, but the take a breath and plaster a worn down and deceiving smile on my ugly and overly tired face. I do this but in reality I know that this facade wont keep up for long and all the glue just won't hold out anymore. Till that day comes I will patiently wait for that moment I can let go of my worries and fears, and just be the true me before everything went downhill. To for once be all 100% of me instead of the constant 2% that I show. Just to finally be free and just..........let go.