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An Apology.
*meek wave* Hi guys, I know that it has been so so so long since this account was even active and I feel as though I owe you guys a major apology and a little bit of explanation.
The time between now and my last posts has been extremely difficult for me. I don’t want to go into specifics but I want you to know that I really really did not want to stop writing for all my wonderful followers. But sometimes life just gets in the way and throws things at you that require all of your time, attention and investment - things that really break you down and make it hard for you to really invest time in anything you enjoy.
I took a very long break from writing all together, it took up so much time and I just couldn’t seem to find any inspiration and everything I did end up writing was a bit meh - I didn’t want to write anything half assed or mediocre for you guys!
Over time things have calmed down, my life is a lot less chaotic - with fewer life altering bombshells being dropped - and despite some set backs I feel I’ve grown stronger for it and am feeling much more optimistic about everything. And, while I’ve been feeling better for a little while now, I didn’t want to jump into writing anything - be it on tumblr or any other platform - until I knew I could fully commit and carry on with stories - so as not to leave loyal followers hanging once again.
To make sure I was up for it I wrote a story - intending it to be a short and simple fanfic that no one would ever read - something to get me back in the swing of things! It turned into a very very long story that I’m still writing and decided to actually share on fanfiction.net. And, while updates aren’t as regular as I would like - life is still busy, as you all know -there are still updates!
I loved every single part of running this blog; the writing, the ideas and inspiration you guys gave me and even just some of the lovely lovely messages that you left me - and continued to leave me after I left! Reading those messages always really picked me up and I want to really thank you guys for that. I never intended on leaving you guys for so long and I know that some of you have been genuinely worried about me - so this is partly a message to reassure you all that I’m okay!
I feel like I’ve really let you all down and for that I feel absolutely terrible! I would be honoured if you would allow me to start writing for you again but I can understand if that’s not the case.
Whatever happens from now I want you all to know that I love you all and I am so very sorry for leaving you all so suddenly.
Love, HC98
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You deserve all the happiness in the world ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you lovely! You deserve everything and anything :) xx
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Please continue losing it
I promise I will! It should be the next thing I upload - if not it will be the second thing I’ll upload! xxx
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Hope you're doing well chum! ❤️💙❤️
Thanks for this message! I’m doing much better now thankyou :) xx
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Familiar Faces Pt.12
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A/N: Look at me! Actually uploading something! Anywho, not much to say about this one except that I used this gif because it sort of fits with the storyline! Anyway, let me know what you think! xx 
“Alby!” Minho’s yell was filled with such startling fear that you couldn’t stop the same emotion from sweeping through your racing heart.
You could understand his desperate yell, it seemed as though Alby had been entirely consumed by the Griever - the slimy, mechanical body covered him completely in a flurry of writhing, metalic limbs. 
Despite Minho’s exclamation the Griever paid the pair of you no mind, as though it had been programmed to focus solely on Alby. Thankfully, you weren’t forced to watch the horror for much longer as the Griever suddenly stopped. 
There was a moment where your muscles tensed, your breath held fast and your mind stuttered to a stop as you waited for the Griever’s next action. A screeching whirring noise erupted from the beast before it scuttled away. 
Finally allowing yourself a shaking breath, you didn’t move. Your mind could barely comprehend the things that had just happened and you could sense that Minho was still standing, in a state of motionless shock, beside you. 
“Alby.” The muttered name served to remind you both that you needed to act - you had no inkling which of you had even spoken the name but the two of you quickly sprung back into action. 
As Minho quickly fell to his knees beside Alby’s figure - hoping to asses the damage - you skidded to a stop beside his head. His features were disturbingly contorted into a clear expression of tortured pain - there was almost no point in Minho checking Alby over; he had almost certainly been stung. 
“Shit.” The quiet curse word was enough to confirm that Minho had found the site of the sting. 
Following his gaze you cringed at the sight of black, raised veins rapidly spreading from the gruesome sting. “What do we do?” You breathed the question into the air, unable to lift your eyes from the wound upon Alby’s slick skin. 
A flicker of movement to your right indicated that Minho had gotten swiftly to his feet. “We gotta go.” 
He was right, the light was fading already, the Doors would be closing soon. 
Gritting your teeth against the impossibility of the situation and attempting to block out the impending mental image of a large ticking clock, you finally looked up at him. “Okay. Help me with him.” 
Minho gaped at your instruction. “No, no, no.” Confused, you raised your eyebrows at him. Surely he wasn’t planning on just leaving Alby here. “You-” he punctuated the word with a harsh pointed finger in your direction “-are getting out of here. I’ll get Alby out but you’ve gotta go.” 
“What? Minho no, I’m not going anywhere!” Subconsciously, you knew you should probably keep your voice down, another Griever could easily be skulking around.
“This isn’t a joke!” Clearly extremely frustrated with both your stubborn attitude and the current situation, Minho apparently hadn’t noticed that he was pulling harshly at his hair. 
“We don’t have time to argue about this Minho, are you going to help me carry him or what?” 
You knew Minho was unlikely to waste your dwindling time and your suspicions were confirmed when he simply muttered “shit” and moved to help you lift Alby.
To begin with, you had held onto hope - sure Alby was heavy and you were pretty sure Minho was taking a lot of the weight, but the dwindling light was almost a perfect metaphor for your declining sense of optimism. 
Rounding the last corner of the Maze your optimism wasn’t helped one bit by the array of panicked and greatly worried faces gathered around the entrance. A cacophony of unintelligible yells and screeched instructions were flung into the abyss of space between you and your exit. 
Why the two of you were still even trying to escape you didn’t know. The Doors were already shuddering closed and it was clear that neither of you would be freed from the impending walls of the Maze. 
It seemed that the two of you gave up at the same time, your arms gave way leaving Alby’s body to tumble unceremoniously to the floor while the two of you fell to the ground - breathing hard and exhausted.
“Greenie,” Your head shot up and Minho’s words - he had to be addressing you, there was no way any of the Glader’s would be idiotic enough to run into the Maze. 
“If you think that was brave comin’ out here, listen up.” And yet, there he was - Thomas - standing before you. What was he thinking? “You’re the shuckiest shuck-faced shuck there ever was.”
Despite the almost crestfallen look upon Thomas’ face you couldn’t help but agree with Minho - no matter how valiant Tom’s actions may have been they were still stupid. 
“You’re as good as dead, just like us.” Cheery, you though solemnly. 
Thomas looked over to you, as though praying for some positive feedback. 
Unable to even muster a grimace, let alone a smile, you sighed and made your way over to him. “Thanks for the gesture Tom, but... Minho’s got a point.”
“Nobody survives a night in the Maze.” Minho’s hushed statement settled over the three of you like a thick mist of fear. 
Standing, staring blankly at the closed doors, Newt didn’t know what to do - or what to think. In fact he was afraid to think too much, scared that his mind would conjure up gruesome images of skulking creatures beyond the wall. 
The Glade was hushed, no one seemed quite sure what to say and a quick glance around confirmed his suspicions that each and every Glader was looking to him for some sort of instruction. 
Realizing that having a quiet emotional breakdown was perhaps unwise at the current moment he opened his mouth to speak but stopped short as it became clear that his mouth had become immeasurably dry. 
Taking a moment, and a much needed breath, Newt swallowed thickly. “In the morning-”
“The morning?” Gally cut him off, almost angrily, arms crossed defiantly over his chest. “Newt, no one survives -”
“I know!” He hadn’t meant to yell. He needed to relax, to breathe - as if that was possible. “I bloody know,” the strained and angry quality of his voice had retreated somewhat, “but nothing’s official until the morning. Got it?” 
Strangely Gally didn’t bother with an angry reply - Newt guessed that his expression must have been tortured enough to give the other boy pause. 
As Gally walked away, Newt could see the other boys leave the maze entrance - leaving him alone with nothing but his own desperate thoughts and the thick stone walls of the Maze. 
Masterlist.
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I just read through your entire blog gah you're amazing
Wow! At this point that is a lot of reading so thank you! I’m so glad you feel that way and am pleased to say that there’s more on the way xx
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Roses are red, violets are blue, your blog is great, some guy does Kung fu
I have to say this poem gave me a little giggle and a big smile for the rest of the day! Thank you for this quirky, lovely little message :) xx
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Don't worry yourself over not having been posting as much as you would've liked, I'm just so glad you're back and well! Love seeing you and your writing pop up on my dash haha! 💕
Thank you so much! It means so much to hear this when I’ve been feeling sooo terrible for not uploading anything at all! You guys continue to be the absolute best followers that a girl could ask for and if anything will keep me motivated it’s definitely you guys! xx
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Apologies!
Hi everyone! As promised I’m writing this just to briefly explain my absence to you guys because if anybody deserves it, my followers deserve it (because you guys are honestly the loveliest, most amazing people). 
Basically as everyone knows the exam period came upon us all and that obviously took up all of my time. After exams a few personal and family issues popped up (things that I’m not going to share) and it all really took a lot out of me and hence, I lost a lot of motivation. 
At the moment I’m feeling much much better, I’ve actually moved away from home for university and although it’s challenging; I’m honestly having the time of my life! And now I have more motivation than ever and so now I would like to promise that this blog will be more active! 
Thanks so much to all of you and all of your lovely messages while I was away - I will reply to them all in time :) 
Lots of Love to all my followers out there!
P.S. If anyone, like myself, has read The Fever Code and would like a place to vent or someone to gush with about it I am certainly your girl. 
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Cracks.
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Request: I heard this song I hadn’t listened to in years that used to be on the radio all the time when I was younger and I thought it might make an interesting Gally AU? It’s called Foundations by Kate Nash and it’s a bit weird but quite catchy! Maybe they have a fight that they don’t properly resolve so it causes this rough patch where they’re always trying to get at/piss each other off or one up each other etc? And they’re both too stubborn to be the one to try to fix it first? But one day something reminds them of how things were at the start of the relationship and they both face up to what they've been doing and where they might be headed if they don't at least try to fix it? Or something sort of like that? The song has a few different plot points and stuff! But don't worry about it if you don't want to write it! Also sorry if I'm not making much sense or rambling! :) x by anon.
A/N: *Sheepish wave* Hi guys! I just wanna briefly say that I am soo sorry! I am going to post something soon just to briefly explain and apologize for my absence - thankyou for sticking with me! And I hope my writing will start to make it up to all my beautiful followers. I really enjoyed writing this so I hope you enjoy reading it! There will be a part two to come! 
That Bastard. You thought venomously, as you stared at the mess left in the kitchen.  He knew you had been at work all day, he knew that you hated having to clean up after him and he certainly knew how tired you would be at this time of the evening. 
Deciding not to waste your energy on yelling at him, choosing to be childish and petty instead, you began tidying the kitchen. You made sure that your huffs and sighs were exaggerated, whilst you placed things in the cupboard with extra exuberance in the petty hope that the endless clanging would awaken him. 
You felt a bitter victory course through your veins when he walked, sullenly, into your kitchen. Not even bothering to hide your smirk, you showed an obvious fake concern. “Oh sorry, did I wake you?” The glare he fixed you with was indication enough that he was aware of the subtle lie in your words. “Or maybe you just came to help me clean up your fucking mess.” 
Shaking his head at you with a gaze filled with disappointment he lazily replied. “It’s your fucking kitchen.” 
Scoffing angrily, you swiftly retorted. “ Oh well that’s funny, seeing as we both paid towards this shitty apartment.” You ensured that your tone was bathed in a fake uncertainty, as though you were seriously considering the situation. 
He said nothing, there was nothing to be said. Almost every heated interaction between the two of you over the past months had ended this way, the two of you running out of energy - neither one of you bothering to even indulge in pettiness anymore - and falling silent. 
For what felt like the thousandth time you merely stood and stared each-other down, eyes darting across the others features as though desperately searching for the one thing you fell in love with in the beginning. 
Opening his mouth to speak, Gally raised a hand to point almost accusingly towards you, but after a moment he thought better. Closing his mouth, he looked away, shaking his head in aggravation. 
As you watched him walk away, out of the apartment with an angry slam of the door, you weren’t entirely sure how to feel. Relieved that he was gone for now? Upset that things had gotten so bad, so suddenly? Reminiscent of the sparse good memories you held of him? Sad that yet another argument had ended without a drop of closure?
Forgetting the mess of the kitchen altogether, despite how it had just caused an argument, you slowly lowered yourself into the nearest chair. In a strange twist of reality, your mind was both racing and entirely still all at once - as though you were aware of the solution to your problems with Gally and yet, you couldn’t stop thinking of an alternative. 
You should let go. 
But you just couldn’t.
Gally hadn’t come back that night, you assumed that he had stayed with one of his few friends but, strangely, you didn’t give much thought to where he had been. He had walked in the morning after, supplied you with a clipped ‘morning’ and then proceeded to clumsily tidy the still messed kitchen. 
You had watched him with curiosity - questions that you couldn’t quite articulate running through your mind. 
Currently, you were both sat on the dingy couch - paying each other no mind. Gally was watching something loud and brash on the television while you flipped through an uninteresting book. Getting bored of scanning the words with abject disinterest, your eyes flickered up to his face. 
You felt your eyebrows raise just slightly as your gaze met his, he had already been watching you. The expression he held never once changed and you felt yourself grow uncomfortable, uncertain - but, as had become the norm, you covered these emotions in a defensive outpouring of aggravation. 
“What?” The snapping word was likely unfair, he had done nothing wrong, but you felt like you were slowly breaking in two and anger was the only way to hide it. 
A chirping sound beside you saved him from having to reply, saved you both from another screaming argument. Thankful for an excuse to break eye contact you swiftly snatched the phone up from the coffee table. 
“It’s Brenda, they wanna have a get together tonight. Like a reunion.” When he made no attempt to reply to that information, you glanced over and pushed him to reply. “Gally?”
“Yeah?” He sounded tired, defeated, finished. 
“Can we go?” 
Keeping your hope hidden away, you waited patiently for a reply. You sincerely doubted that his answer would be yes, these were your friends - not his - and there seemed to be at least some level of mutual dislike between them. 
“Yeah..” The word was spoken in an almost cautious manner, as though he wasn’t quite sure whether it was the right response. 
Failing miserably to hide the surprise from your widening eyes, you smiled at him - for the first time in what felt like years. “Thanks...” You told him, feeling odd. “I’ll let her know.” 
 “You came!” Brenda’s exclamation was surprisingly loud as she pulled you into the apartment. 
Sheepish, you attempted a smile. “I told you we would.”
Something about those words, or perhaps the way you had said them, seem to sit strangely with Brenda. “Yeah, but...” Seeming to think better than to explain herself, Brenda shook her head and muttered “don’t worry” before leading you and Gally into the living room. 
“Shit! You guys actually came!” As usual, Minho employed more cursing than was actually necessary but his burst of speech and surprise gave you pause. 
They clearly had not expected you to come, despite your reassurances. 
Deciding not to question them, having grown weary of confrontation and disagreement, you smiled and accepted his embrace. After a friendly pat on the back Minho let you go, his eyes sliding past you and towards your companion. 
“Gally.” He greeted, curt. 
Nodding in response, Gally shifted just slightly towards your figure. Why did he do that? As soon as the thought flashed through your mind you found yourself pondering when exactly it was that you had begun questioning his every action. 
Sensing the slight awkwardness in the room, Newt spoke up next. “You two gonna sit down or what?” Thankful for the humor in his tone you shot him a smile and sat beside him - Gally coming to claim the seat on your other side. 
About an hour into the night, any lingering discomfort in the air had dissipated like smoke, and you were honestly enjoying yourself. As usual Minho had been the main talker but none of you really minded, their group dynamic had always worked strangely well. 
Gally didn’t say much, unsurprisingly, but you found that you didn’t mind so much - you still felt grateful that he had even agreed to come. 
In fact the entire night had made you strangely reminiscent - remembering times long forgotten. Memories of when you and Gally had first met, your first date, your first kiss, your relationship back when it had been shiny and new and happy. 
You missed it. 
The drive home had been silent, but not heavy. For the entire journey your mind had been preoccupied, thinking about Gally and how everything could have possibly gotten so bad. 
In a daze you had walked with him from the car to the apartment, silence still hanging in the air. Before Gally could retreat into the bedroom, you gripped his arm. “Gally, wait.” 
He seemed nervous to turn and face you, probably worried that you would say something to spark an argument. Unfortunately, you doubted that the night would end without an argument however, you were hoping that it would lack the pettiness of your previous screaming matches. 
“We need to talk.”
Masterlist. 
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Losing It. Pt 11.
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Requests:
Will there be Losing it part 11? pleasee by always-and-foreeveer
Please continue the "Losing It" Pan series? I just read all of it and it's ridiculously good. Thank you :3 by evelynfaervel
A/N: Hey guys! The long awaited 11th installment is finally here! I’ll admit it is a little short but I feel like it’s an important one that really sets the stage - considering I’m getting close to the end now :/ Also, you may have noticed the gif is just a cool shot of trees - this is mostly down to the fact that I feel I’ve used the same gifs all through this series so I thought I’d change it up! Anywho, please let me know what you guys think!! xx
Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10
“Dad, I...” You cut yourself off quickly. Should you really ask him about all this? 
You had been debating for a long while as to whether you should even bring it up, the one question that had been plaguing your confused mind ever since your father’s incident in the water; why am I so inexplicably afraid of water?
For a brief second, you had considered whether it was simply just some random phobia, without any feasible source, but you had quickly dismissed that notion. ‘Afraid’ perhaps wasn’t even the right word to use - it wasn’t as though you saw water and would instantly fall into the throes of terrors - it was more of a.. reasonable avoidance. 
Stuck between wanting to avoid any and all conversations with your father, still uncertain as to where the two of you stood amidst the recent and painful revelations, and desperately needing answers, you remained contemplative for a few more steps. 
Unfortunately, your father wasn’t so oblivious that your few words had gone unnoticed. “What is it?” He asked offhandedly, glancing suspiciously through the trees - as he had been doing for the entirety of the walk.  
Biting your lip, deciding that your thirst for answers overwhelmed any of the awkwardness with your father, you mumbled out a question. “Dad, is there.... is there a reason I’m afraid of water?” 
Had your eyes not been nervously cast downwards, avoiding any form of eye contact, you would have noticed the panicked widening of his eyes or even the almost violent clenching of his jaw. 
Deflecting, your father hit back with a confrontational question, not the answers you so craved.  “What makes you think you’re afraid of water?” You could hear the defensive tone dripping from his question, but you were too uncertain about his response to the entire truth to bother exploiting it.
“Well... scared isn’t really the right word. More like....” Your hands were subtly moving through the air before you, as though you were physically searching for the right wording. “I feel like I need to avoid it?” You voiced this description like a question, hoping to prompt him into giving you any form of answers. 
Blankly staring at you for a moment, you could see your father absentmindedly fiddling with the loose button on his coat - he was weighing his response, you had seen the action enough times to know what it meant. 
“Where’s this even come from?” The fiddling hand stilled as he asked, your father avoiding your gaze as he masked his frustration with disinterest. 
Stopping short, mouth fallen open as though to reply, you begrudgingly realized that you were going to have to start being at least partially honest - if only to get him to do the same. “I... when you were in the water... I couldn’t...” Your hands were clasped before you awkwardly, your thumbs awkwardly interlocking as you attempted to contain your discomfort. “I just couldn’t go in and get you.” 
With bated breath you waited for his surprise, for him to ask how you managed to retrieve him from the water, but his masked expression never faltered. Feeling your eyebrows raise in surprise, a question quickly springing to your lips, you opened your mouth to speak. 
Cutting you off, your father spoke in hushed tones. “Now is not the time.” 
Feeling somewhat insulted and belittled by his condescending tone, you repeated his words. “Now is not the time?” You ensured that your voice was raised, as it had become clear that he was ridiculously paranoid about the possibility of an eavesdropper - you, on the other hand, were unconcerned. 
Looking entirely put out, he grumbled out a response. “Here is not the place.” 
As much as you desperately wished to disagree with him, more due to your own frustration than anything else, you knew he had a point. Here, where it felt like you were all cogs in some master plan, was certainly not the place. 
Huffing angrily, knowing there wasn’t much you could reasonably say in response, you childishly kicked at a loose rock.
“I have a question.” Looking up, almost nervously to your father, you raised your eyebrows. Taking the small change in your expression as indication to carry on, he took a few steps towards your figure as he spoke once more. “How did you get me out of the water?” 
The accusatory tone of his voice revealed that his suspicion on the subject had been brewing for a while and the angry set of his shoulders were indication that he already knew the answer. 
Feeling entirely put on the spot, you quickly crossed your arms over your chest - suddenly feeling the need to be defensive. Pressing your lips together, you remained silent.
He didn’t like that. 
“He clearly didn’t do it.” Following the wild gesture of his hand you glanced to the sorcerer, grinning maniacally while collecting leaves from the forest floor, and silently agreed. “You’ve almost admitted that you didn’t.” Daring to glance at him, you found suspicion clouding his eyes. “So who did?”
Breathing deep, ineffectively forcing yourself to calm, you quietly answered his question. “I think you know.” 
Your small sentence was all the conformation he needed. Knotting a hand in his hair, almost entirely in panic, you heard him curse under his breath. He looked almost distraught, as though you had just told him that the Jolly Roger had been sunk. 
“We need to get off this bloody island.” 
As though the indecision and uncertainty you had already faced on this Island hadn’t been difficult enough, you now couldn’t decide whether you agreed with his statement or not. 
Your silence seemed to further panic him, as he took yet another step towards you.  “This isn’t a good place.” 
“I know.” 
He gave a dry chuckle. “Do you?” 
Listening from the trees, Peter was intrigued, and incredibly irritated all at once. The aggravation had mostly sprung from the annoying lack of answers he had managed to overhear.. 
The conversation had still been an interesting one to listen to however, both you and your father had kept certain things to yourselves. Part of him was immeasurably pleased, he had successfully shaken up the trust between you and your father, but he couldn’t help feeling disappointed at the lack of answers. 
He had hoped, perhaps mistakenly, that in his apparent absence your father would be honest with you - would tell you what was going on. He had almost interrupted, almost jumped into the conversation and made your father provide answers - but he held himself back, preferring the sly approach.
But, even as he anxiously awaited answers, he was pleased at the heavy tension that was starkly apparent in the strained conversation. It was clear that neither of you fully trusted each-other anymore - something which played perfectly into his hands. 
In a way he was pleased by your somewhat surprising show of dishonesty - you clearly weren’t comfortable telling your father anything to do with Peter himself - meaning you were perhaps feeling more for him than you cared to admit.
Returning to his Lost Boys, Peter couldn’t help but smirk - devilishly. Everything was working perfectly.
Masterlist.
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YOUR WRITING IS THE BEST ILY
ILY too! You guys are all the absolute BEST!
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Not a question but.... I just found your blog and let me tell a you!! YOU IS JESUS!! I love your writing. xxx❤️
Haha, thank you! I never realized I was Jesus ;P Thanks for all the love! xxx
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Love all the things you've written so far on this blog! 💙
I’m so glad! Loving all the amazing followers I have! xx
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:)
Hi guys, just a quick note to say to whoever sent in requests today - don’t worry about it, it’s totally fine and I honestly don’t mind. I’m going to leave the requests in my inbox just until requests are reopened and then I’ll add them to the list and get started on them! I didn’t reply to the messages directly because I somehow accidentally deleted them (?) but this is my reply and, to recap, don’t worry about it - it’s totally fine :) xxx 
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Thank you so much for the Stiles imagine! It was absolutely amazing and better than I could have ever imagined. You are such a talented writer and I really admire you! Thank you again❤️
I’m glad you liked it! I stayed up until about two in the morning finishing it - I was majorly in the zone! Thanks for the awesome request! xx
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Yey! And I'm fine with waiting, this one time I waited like two years for an update.
Wow! That is patient - well done! I’m hoping it won’t take quite that long :) xxx
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