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hellithides · 5 months

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#made me giggle and kick my feet

12:03 pm — gojo satoru

synopsis. gojo tries to convince his first years that he was able to pull you.

contents. fluff, crack??, whipped!gojo, mentions of having a kid, he is SO in love with his wife it's disgusting, the first years are sick of their teacher

“[name] sensei is a good looking woman, isn’t she?” yuji remarked, nonchalantly propping his feet up on the desk. “you think so too, right gojo sensei?”

a sly smile played on the corners of gojo's lips, eventually blossoming into a wide, dreamy grin. “good eye yuji! she's undeniably the most beautiful woman on this planet.”

megumi, seated at the desk beside yuji, couldn't hide his grimace.

nobara's expression mirrored that of a disgruntled sea urchin. “dream big, you two. she’s way outta both of your leagues.”

“she is, isn’t she?” gojo sighs dreamily, his gaze far away. a dopey grin settles over his face; like a man walking on air. it was deeply unsettling to the first years to see a grown man behave this way.

megumi rolled his eyes and muttered his disapproval, choosing to ignore his sensei, who had casually seated himself backwards on a chair.

gojo propped his chin with both of his palms, leaning closer into the first years students. “do you think i’d stand a chance with a woman like her?”

megumi buried his face in his hands, audibly groaning in response.

“a sensible woman like that and you? fat chance.” nobara deadpanned, squinting disapprovingly at her teacher. her negative comments elicit a grunt from the snow-haired man.

yuji’s eyes flit nervously from kugisaki to gojo.

“sensei! i think you have a chance with [name] sensei!” yuji tried to reassure his white haired teacher, offering a thumbs-up. gojo responded by affectionately ruffling yuji’s hair.

megumi couldn’t help but speak up. “she’s a married woman, you know,” he mutters to his friend.

yuji’s eyes widened, “you’re kidding! who do you think got the honor?”

“but she’s so young!” kugisaki exclaimed, slamming her hand on the table.

their discussion is cut short when the shoji doors of the classroom slide open abruptly.

with hands on your hips, you stood sternly before your first year students and their teacher, an air of authority about you.

satoru couldn't help but gulp; you were indeed captivating when you were upset. it’s not his fault that you look so cute when your eyebrows furrow and you puff up in anger.

“i waited for half an hour in the courtyard to start today’s lesson and yet here i find my students, along with their sensei who should be in kyoto for a meeting.” a wry smile graced your lips, sending a chill down everyone’s spine. the three first years bowed their heads in shame.

yuji thinks this is the first time he’s seen his teacher nervous. a bead of sweat appears on the side of gojo’s face.

“honey!” he quickly stands up and walks towards you. with every step he takes, nobara’s face scrunches up at his disgusting conduct.

“don’t.” you warned, raising a finger up to keep satoru at an arm’s length. he respected your wishes to some extent, grasping your hand and placing it within the hold of his own. the diamond on your ring finger glistened as satoru toyed with it.

gasps filled the room as yuji and nobara observed the display of affection. just how inappropriate could their sensei get, and why were you allowing it? what would your husband think?

satoru tenderly caressed your hand in his, cradling it as he leaned in closer. “please forgive me; it was an honest mistake.”

“honest mistake my ass. yaga told me that this is the second meeting you’ve skipped out this month,” you stated, peering fiercely into his blindfolded eyes. satoru’s cocky demeanor wavered, replaced by a nervous chuckle.

“the first time was when i took you to naha, remember?” he wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. “and if i remember correctly, you enjoyed our night out,” your eyes widened, recalling the romantic trip satoru had organized.

feeling the heat rise to your cheeks, you attempted to pull away, but his grip on your hand tightened.

“forgive me?” his voice softened, lips curving downward, giving him the appearance of a dejected kitten.

a sigh escapes your lips. he was going to be the death of you.

“fine. but this is the last time,” you warned, “and you owe me for covering for you.”

satoru straightened up, nodding fervently. “have i mentioned how much i love you?” wrapping an arm around you, he placed a kiss on the top of your head, despite your futile attempts to stop him.

“this is…” yuji’s jaw dropped.

“so inappropriate! shame on you!” nobara’s chair makes a harsh screech with how fast she leaves it to come to your aid.

“kugisaki–” you attempted to calm her down, but she clung to your elbow, desperately trying to pry you from satoru’s embrace.

satoru’s hold on you tightened as he wrapped his other arm around your frame, pulling you close. he plops his chin on top of your head and resists nobara’s attempts to free you. like hell he’s letting anybody take his girl, not even his own student.

“crushing on a married woman is one thing, but to openly flirt with her– ” kugisaki struggled. you tilt your head in confusion.

satoru’s strong arms flexed as he fought to maintain his hold on you. he nuzzled your neck. “’m fine right here,” he inhaled deeply, as if trying to take in as much of you as possible.

“[name] sensei! how can you stand there and let this man disrespect your marriage?!” nobara implored, wide-eyed, disregarding all respect she had for her teacher. “how will your husband react when he finds how gojo sensei behaves around you?” she looks desperate, and you want to laugh at the sincerity behind her actions. you get it now.

only your idiot husband would pull a stunt like this.

“i hope your husband can fight because i’m willing to fight him to the death for your hand,” satoru mutters from your neck. you take your hand from nobara’s shoulders to shove the six-foot-three giant away.

“you seriously didn’t tell them, satoru?” you ignored his whiney protests as you created distance between the two of you.

“tell us what?” kugisaki demanded. yuji was on the edge of his seat, nervously watching the unfolding scene, while megumi put his head down in embarrassment.

satoru looks at you with a deep frown on his face. uncertainty clouds your mind as his silence forebodes something. wetting his lips with his tongue, he quickly closed the gap between you, too fast for you to escape. a secure hand rested on your lower waist as your husband dipped you down to deepen the kiss.

had you not been so absorbed into the kiss, you would have heard the scandalized gasps from your students.

you managed to place a hand on his chest to separate yourselves, “satoru, stop.” his eyes remained fixed on your lips, but he complied.

“yuji, nobara.. satoru and i are–” you hold up your ring finger for display.

“happily married!” your husband finished for you, a triumphant smile on his face. he squeezed you close, throwing up a peace sign. “been madly in love since i met her!”

“what– no way! you pulled her?!” nobara spluttered, head whipping from satoru to you, unable to wrap her mind around the revelation.

yuji’s jaw is still on the floor, “megumi, you knew about this?!”

the sea urchin looks the other direction, avoiding his friends’ judgemental gazes.

“they… raised me.. sorta..” he mumbles under his breath. your heart melts at his confession. unlike you, the other first years don't take too kindly to his comment, as they start shaking him by the shoulder and starting their own interrogation.

“and we did a good job too! don’t you think we’re ready for our own?” satoru smiles down at you jokingly, his hands snaking around your waist and his hands sneaking onto your stomach. he leaves a couple of soft pats.

“you’re cuter when you’re quiet, y’know?” you whispered. taking advantage of your students' attention on megumi, you place a single finger on his lips, hoping your husband does not notice the way your face feels like it is on fire.

he does.

“no need to be shy now,” satoru said, grinning wolfishly, “we’ll continue this at home.”

your face flushes even deeper.

unbeknownst to you, the first years had fallen silent, observing how gojo whispered in your ear, successfully turning you into a flustered mess. perhaps they should give more credit to their sensei.

notes. not proof read (oh no). this was just a random scenario that has been plaguing my mind during halloweekend so i typed it on my phone at a party LOL this is me desperately trying to get out of my writing slump

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hellithides · 5 months

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MY HEART!!

If Gojo, Shoko and Geto had adopted Tsumiki and Megumi

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hellithides · 6 months

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First time posting on tumblr dont be mean to me pls. I just couldn’t get this soft scara scenario off my mind.

Synopsis: scara gets pissy with work, good thing you’re there to soothe him. Pure fluff. Tooth-rotting fluff.

Scaramouche x GN!Reader Fluff

It’s one of those days. You’re sitting in his office reading a book while he works across you. It’s his request, really. Saying that your presence in the same room calms him enough so he doesn’t lose his mind. He never wanted you to stray too far from him, preferring to keep you within his sights at all times. Nevertheless, it’s been a few hours of silence and your eyes have become strained from reading for so long. Your gaze lands on him, observing him for a moment.

“Love.”

You call, turning his attention away from the pile of documents on his desk to you. He spares you a glance before returning to his work.

“What?”

Slight irritation present is in his voice when response comes. You know it’s not because of you though, instead it’s simply him tense from the tedious work in front of him.

“I’m bored.”

His eyes flit back up to you, pressing you with a gaze that basically screams ‘are you serious?’. Still, he sighs, putting the documents aside to give you the attention you’re obviously seeking from him. The sound of his chair being pushed back rings through his office, a silent invitation that leads you to stand up and make your way towards him with your book clutched. You smile as he begrudgingly(not really) wraps his arms around your waist with a grunt. You settle yourself onto his lap, your legs on either side of his waist with both of your chests pressed together. He huffs before speaking.

“Just sit there quietly. I have work to do so you better entertain yourself.”

His tone is harsh as it usually is but you know how to read between the lines this far into your relationship with him. All he really means is for you to keep him company as he works. You press your cheek against his shoulder, closing your eyes for a few minutes to rest before going back to reading.

The both of you stay like that for a while, hours bleeding into each other in silence. He works quietly, unbothered by the frequent sound of pages flipping and your occasional humming each time there’s an interesting scene in the chapter. Your proximity is not lost on him, and your presence is calming rather than distracting.

As the sun sets, he leans back against his seat, sighing with frustration. You take notice of his tense demeanor and close the book to turn your focus on him.

“What’s wrong? Am I too heavy?”

“No, you're fine. I'm just irritated with this... stupid job for being such a pain in the ass.”

He sighs again, pinching the bridge of his nose. You acknowledge this with a hum, leaning back to look at him properly. His brows knitted together in a deep frown.

“What’s it about?”

You question, putting your book on your lap before poking him in the cheek. He huffs, grabbing your wrist to stop you.

“Some boring bureaucratic mess. I just need to sign a few documents, but I have to meet with the most insufferable person for it.”

“Who?”

He rolls his eyes and lets go of your wrists. The opportunity presents itself to you and you place your hands on his face, pinching his cheek and trying to smooth the wrinkles on his forehead. He lets you.

“It's the most arrogant woman on Teyvat, and I'm surprised she'd even bother meeting me. Yae Miko.”

His scowl deepens.

“Just having to be in the same room as that woman makes my skin crawl.”

He shudders with disgust at the thought of it. You pat him lightly on the head.

“You wanna take a break?”

He closes his eyes and nod, leaning into the gesture without hesitation.

“Yeah. I need a rest. The Fatui has been exhausting lately. Let me just...”

Leaning further forward, he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you as close as possible. In an effort to soothe him, you rest your head on his shoulder and run your hand up and down his back. He groans at the relaxing gesture, a tense sigh escaping his lips.

“Mmm... I'm sorry I'm not in a better mood today. This work is so tedious.”

“It’s fine, I don’t mind. I’m glad I can at least offer you some comfort.”

You sink into the comfortable position. Your bodies pressed together, feeling the steady heartbeats in each other’s chest. It's... soothing. His breathing becomes slow and even, as he relaxes with you in his embrace. He feels his stress melting away with every minute, simply enjoying the silence together.

A sudden thought occurs to him.

“...Hey, Love. You're never going to leave me... are you?”

You perk up at the question, leaning backwards and raising your brow at him.

“Hm? Of course not. Why do you ask?”

“If everything about our life stayed exactly as it is right now, without anything changing... You wouldn't get bored, and you wouldn't fall out of love with me... would you?”

The words come in a small whisper, barely audible. If the wind hadn't been still silent, you might not have heard them. You close your eyes and sink deeper into his embrace.

“No. Even monotony with you is enjoyable. Even just this, sitting on your lap and holding each other… it’s everything I could ever want.”

You nuzzle closer, bringing home your point. He stays quiet for a while, relishing the contact with you. A small smile creeps across his face. His tone is genuine, as he opens his eyes to look up towards you.

“You're the best, you know that?”

“Mm. Of course I do. Only the best would be worthy to be your lover.”

You smirk at him, eyes twinkling with slight mischief making him shake his head at you. He rolls his eyes slightly before he leans forward to plant a soft kiss on your lips. Your heart flutters as you exchange this gentle and affectionate gesture. When you pull back, his eyes are filled with a smugness as he regards you.

“Yeah... that's right. Only you’re allowed to be with a god like me.”

He snickers before wrapping his arms around your waist tighter.

“I love you. So I'm keeping you. You’re stuck with me forever.”

His words makes you chuckle and you return the gesture with a kiss on the cheek.

“I love you too.”

You sink further into his warm embrace with a smile, relishing the tender moment between the two of you.

#genshin impact #genshin smut #scaramouche #genshin scara #scarameow #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche fluff #scaramouche smut #kunikuzushi #wanderer #kunikuzushi fluff #wanderer fluff #tooth rotting fluff #pure fluff #gn reader

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hellithides · 6 months

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Scaramocuhe drabble

Writing mean, "bully", and angry characters being vulnerable, soft, gentle and sweet. >>>

Like, I deadass will stand by the fact Scaramouche would 100% make soft sex with you, kissing your neck, biting your lips in a desperate attempt to silence his own moans and whimpers.

Hell, he would manhandle you in a very soft way, pushing your hips into the mattress to reach deeper inside. Pulling your legs over his shoulders and mumbling how gorgeous you are, how much he loves you, how pretty/handsome you are, pulling your arms away from your face/body, placing your palms on his chest/face.

He would love seeing your face when your orgasm came, his own would follow and he'd repeat your name as if it was a prayer, kissing and whimpering against open mouthed kisses, holding your hips so close to his, it looked impossible. His voice would shake and crack into a high pitched moan, his body would shudder and jolt as he came inside. His hand caressing your face as his hips twitched and jolted, a broken sob escaped his throat as he filled you up, it felt so good he was going to lose his mind.

His pretty violet eyes would meet yours and there would be no malice, no attitude, no intimidating facade... It'd just be drowsy, full of love, pupils blown. He's basically putty in your arms, catching his breath he'd place his head onto your chest, listening to your heartbeat slow, and become steady, the gentle brushing of your fingers through his hair as his arms wrap around your frame would make him melt and become lovestruck even further.

raah. Anyway, I'm just sayin—

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hellithides · 7 months

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★ Birds of a Feather ★

The Wanderer x Reader | ~ 4k words

Warnings: The Wanderer is… the way he is- he’s just generally very antagonizing. Has absolutely no grasp on how to healthily interpret or express his own feelings; TL;DR he’s emotionally messy but it’s mostly internal. Gets very introspective, brief mentions of body horror (not intensely descriptive but it’s there). Gets a little suggestive at the end bc apparently I’m nothing if not existential and vaguely homoerotic. Vague worship??? Idk you can tell I have religious trauma.

Info: GN Reader who is also in Vahumana (specialty of study is not specified) has been recruited by Nahida to collaborate with the Wanderer. The reader knows Kaveh and is stated to be around his age. No physical descriptors used. Heavily inspired by his birthday letter from last year where he mentions his inability to connect with his peers but how he is admittedly kind of lonely/doesn’t believe he’s capable of connection.

——————————————————————————

Sumeru was a strange nation; nearly as strange as its archon. At least that’s what The Wanderer had decided over the course of his self imposed imprisonment. But in a competition of peculiarity, you’d always take the cake.

In all his years of traversing Teyvat, he’d amassed quite the collection of experiences and stories he liked to chew on until they lost their bite. Much like the bitter tea leaves he enjoyed so much, he’d sit and mull over whatever memory struck his fancy until it started to come apart at the seams. He’d steep in it over and over until it lost its taste- then he’d give that one a break and move on to the next, only to inevitably repeat the process again some other time. He knew it wasn’t productive, of course. But it was a not so guilty pleasure of his, one he intended to indulge in as long as it kept his interest. Nahida would have none of it though, much to his chagrin. She’d given him some shpiel about not spending all his time in his head, something or another about a “self affirming echo chamber leading to stagnation”. A valid criticism, sure, but he thought he deserved a little stagnation every once in a while! If anyone had experienced periods of dynamic and continuous change it was him. He had three iterations already, and he most certainly was not aiming for a fourth any time soon. He figured she’d let it go and let him continue on with his innocuous hobby, lest he be unleashed onto her citizens in any greater capacity than his academic pursuits.

Of course he should’ve known better than that.

When she called for him a few days later, it shouldn’t have been a surprise that she wasn’t alone. There you were, standing at her side as if it was the most natural thing for you to do. Immediately he had a sinking feeling.

When you introduced yourself it only worsened- great, you were going to be around enough for him to need to know your name? What was Nahida planning? You weren’t entirely unfamiliar- he was pretty sure you were also in the Vahumana Darshan. At the very least you were bright enough for him to vaguely recognize; that was more than could be said for most of his peers.

“They’re going to be accompanying you for a while,” Nahida told him simply, as if that one sentence didn’t obliterate his established day to day routine.

He cut his eyes at you, then the Dendro Archon. “Goodness, well. I had no idea my social performance was so abysmal that you’d try hiring friends for me.”

The tiny god just shook her head, hands on her hips. “Now don’t be like that. I just want you to get a different perspective on things. That includes Sumeru and its people at large.”

“Ah, so you’ve booked me a tour guide then.” He bit back, clearly uneasy with this direction Nahida’s lessons were taking.

He certainly wasn’t expecting to hear you laugh at his attempt to retaliate. As much as he wanted to snarl, he didn’t detect an ounce of pity or mockery in your tone. “I’m maybe the worst person you could’ve picked if that’s the case.” The way you met his gaze so easily was enough to make him nauseous.

“It’s not that either. I just think you two would get along well, that’s all.” Nahida still had the same soft expression, one he still couldn’t read but knew it meant trouble.

And so his new routine began. At first he tried to ignore you, but Nahida would have none of that. It didn’t take long before his avoidant tactics were worn down by her valid criticisms and patient lecturing, and soon he found himself in your company whether he wanted to be or not. His new problem, however, was that he was beginning to not mind the arrangement. He wasn’t sure when it happened, but as weeks turned into months of awkward conversation and biting sarcasm, he grew used to your presence. He had to admit that Nahida’s plan worked far too well. He hardly had the time or need for his little hobby.

There were logical reasons as to why he didn’t mind your presence, of course. You were wickedly smart (for a mortal, he told himself) and observant to a fault, and your brutal honesty was oddly refreshing. There was no pity or malice in the way you talked to him- he was just like everyone else for once, something he didn’t know he’d find so thrilling until you were lazily telling him to fuck off like anyone else who dared to disturb your work. You listened to him- even though you didn’t agree with his personal philosophy, he felt strangely validated by the way you’d think about it before refuting his arguments. And the way you made note of the things he liked and responded accordingly, like bringing him teas or research papers that you’d thought he’d enjoy, made him keenly aware of the fact that you did acknowledge him outside of your allotted time together. He didn’t cease to exist to you once he was out of sight- something he couldn’t quite wrap his head around. And yet there was something else that he enjoyed about you even more than any of those logical, reasonable attributes.

It was the way you handled him.

When he got mouthy, or went just a little too low, you had a way of putting him right back in his place. Whether it was an equally sharp remark back or a silent stare that made his spine tingle, you seemed to have no qualms with biting back. It was strangely exhilarating, and each time he found himself wanting you to do it again. Frequently he’d wind up intentionally pushing your buttons in the hopes that you’d respond. At times it was a destructive self defense mechanism, as if to try and push you away when you got just a little too under his skin, but sometimes it was something else. Something he’d never admit to a solitary soul, himself or otherwise. Sometimes, he did it to see if you’d get tired of him. He was sure you had an end to your patience, your companionship archon appointed or not. There was something that made his chest tighten when you’d return fire without fail. Not only that, but sometimes it felt like he needed you to handle him because he couldn’t handle himself.

You couldn’t physically overpower him if you tried, neither could anyone else really, but it wasn’t about that. It was the way you’d laugh at him when he said something meant to rub you the wrong way, as if it was so stupid it didn’t deserve a reaction. Or how you’d respond with something equally pointed, as if it was all one big game- and it was. It had become a conspiratory back and forth that put everyone around you on edge. Even Nahida would sometimes appear put off by your complicated dynamic- if there was one time she truly felt that she didn’t understand humans, it would be while watching you two go at each other as you combed through the respective materials you’d brought to exchange. Despite being downright verbally aggressive towards one another, your actions were the complete opposite. You’d show up with two drinks any time you expected to meet, even if he always undercut the gesture with some comment about transactions and ‘owing you’. He’d edit your work without warning, handing over a copy of your most recent piece with a vague wave of his hand as if he hadn’t stayed up all night reviewing it. It was a dance of sorts- neither of you could sufficiently say you trusted the other. How could you when you rarely made it a point to get personal? Even if you were to try, he wasn’t exactly keen on explaining a lifetime's worth of unbelievable events without proof. Besides, he was a wanderer, destined to pass through and eventually leave Sumeru. What point was there in cementing a bond that was already too sturdy for its own good? You saw him, or perhaps saw through him, and shouldn’t that be enough? Despite that, he sometimes found himself testing the waters. It was sort of an experiment- he wanted to see how far he could push it, how much you could really handle him for all he was worth.

When you invited him into your home for the first time, he knew you were just as curious.

Sitting there side by side in your living room, surrounded by research materials of all kinds, he felt that familiar itch to pester you overcome him. The way you’d methodically skimmed the same page for the past half hour was beginning to make him feel weirdly exposed.

“You’ve been reading that passage for a while,” he began, leaning in to get a better look at your face as you hunched over the manuscript.

“Mhm.”

“Ah, a response. I was beginning to think I’d finally bored you to death. But it looks like I’m not that lucky.”

“Mhm.”

“What’s got you so focused? I thought this passage was relatively straightforward. Maybe I just overestimated you,” he sighed rather dramatically.

You didn’t reply that time, his insult falling on deaf ears.

“If something like this is your limit, then perhaps I should find someone else to edit my work.”

Silence.

“Or I’ll just do it myself- it’s not like anyone else in Vahumana could do any better. I’d had hope for you, but I-“

You finally tore your gaze away from the papers in front of you, instead locking onto him. When you hissed his name- not his title but his name, the one he’d only recently acquired- he knew he’d finally get what he was so desperately seeking.

“You wanna know what has me so focused? Trying to make this publishable,” you snipped back.

When he laughed at your outburst you pressed forward. “The information is solid, but it’s full of jargon that most people would find hard to stomach. Syntactically you could do well with having the comma taken away from you until you learned to use it appropriately. It’s not used incorrectly per se, but archons, I’m begging you to use any other form of punctuation. A semicolon, even a dash, anything to create variation. When your sentences are all structured the same way, it makes for a dry read and wastes otherwise good writing. But the biggest problem is that all of this,” you took up your pen and bracketed roughly half the page. “This is purely conjecture, no matter how sound it may look. And while I personally enjoy your theoreticals about Inazuman political history, I cannot think of a single source to back some of these arguments. A hypothesis is not publishable unless presented as such, but the framework of your thesis hinges on these claims as proven fact. I could maybe swing it if it were possible to prove them in the future, but half of these don’t even meet that criteria. So yes, I’m stuck. I’ve been racking my brain for sources I could offer you for citations. And if you could give me just fifteen minutes of silence that do not involve you staring at me like there’s a countdown until you vivisect me on my coffee table, I might be able to get somewhere.”

He took a second to recover- he often needed to when you’d sink your teeth into him like that- before cocking his head at you with an absolutely infuriating grin. “Well I’ve published papers before with my so-called conjecture. Why is it a problem now? Last time I checked my ‘hypotheticals’ were called groundbreaking.”

“There’s a fine line between groundbreaking and unfounded. Look, if I had to believe anyone on this subject it’d be you. I can’t think of anybody else who could put together work like this. But if I’m editing, I want to actually fine tune it. Even if it’s passable at this stage, I know it can be better. Something this interesting should be perfected.”

“How flattering, I had no idea you were such a fan of my work. Even if it is a ‘dry read’. But fine, if you’re so inclined then go ahead. I don’t really care either way. At least give me something to do in the meantime.” He leaned in again to ensure he had your full and undivided attention. “And by the way, I wouldn’t vivisect you. That’s excessive even for me. I’d at least have the decency to kill you first before I went prodding around.”

When you met his gaze without hesitation, he felt that familiar prickle run along his spine.

“How sweet of you. Anyway, I don’t really have much for you to do. You’ve already finished editing my most recent arguments. If you want to go home I’m fine with that. I can give this to you tomorrow if so. If not, I’m happy to have company. I mean you could help yourself to my bookshelf, but other than that your options are limited.” You returned to the task at hand, combing over the text just as thoroughly as before.

Now it was his turn to look perplexed.

“Well that’s stupid. Then you’d be doing this for free.”

“I already do it for free,” you sighed, knowing exactly where he was going.

“You do it as a part of an exchange. If I didn’t do the same for you, it would be for free. And right now, your labor isn’t being reciprocated. So what exactly do you get out of this?”

“I don’t want anything in return. I’m doing this because I like your work, and because you’re you. I wouldn’t do it otherwise.”

“What, because Lesser Lord Kusanali says you have to?” He sat with his arms crossed firmly over his chest, far too motionless to resemble anything human. “More than that, you could get anybody to edit your work. You’re established enough. So why do you still agree to this?”

“Oh don’t be dense. You’re the only person I’d ever let near my research aside from the Dendro Archon herself. Anybody else would try to rip off my work or make a quick buck as a ‘ghost contributor’ or some other bullshit.” You still didn’t look up from his writing despite how candidly you spoke. “You see my work for what it is, and criticize it accordingly. You don’t want anything else from me, and I don’t want anything else from you. That’s what I get out of this. And yes I know that’s paradoxical, but you’re smart enough to know what I’m getting at.”

When you finally did look back at him he noticed just how exhausted you looked. He almost felt bad for pushing your buttons. Almost. Your answer had been… strangely enlightening. He’d never believed a net zero transaction between two people was possible, and yet if he took your words at face value that’s what he had. And so he needed to push it further.

“And what if I do want something from you? What then?” He half expected you to burst into tears, or at least kick him out. But you simply pinched the bridge of your nose, letting out a long sigh.

“Well, then I’ve got no idea what it is. It seems like the only thing you want is to drive me fucking insane.” There was no bite to your remark, only a kind of resignation. “Or maybe you just want me to talk to you. It’s gotta be lonely, being the most pompous asshole around.” You paused, leaning back against the cushions of your couch to stare at the ceiling tiles. “Maybe you’ve got a little crush on me or something.”

Now it was his turn to sigh. You’d never gone that direction with your taunting before. He figured he’d take the safest route out of whatever web you were building. “I could say the same for you, you know. Of course we both know better than that, so don’t trouble yourself with that train of thought. That pretty little head of yours is already at capacity as it is.” He tapped a finger on the manuscript you’d ceased editing.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He realized you were looking right at him once more, clearly tired of his never ending vague statements.

“I mean it’s obvious you’d have eyes for somebody else.” He decided to drive his point home- he wanted to embarrass you away from the subject because now he felt quite exposed. You were right, of course. But that was unthinkable. All those years spent without genuine connection and now that he’d found it, something inside of him wanted to squander it for a chance at more? For a creature born without a heart, he sure was greedy. He wasn’t equipped to admit that to himself, much less to you. No way, he’d have to end the conversation and never let it resurface.

“You’re awfully close with that blonde from Kshahrewar. It wouldn’t surprise me if you two were… involved with one another. He’s a bit of a mess but- well, that makes it even more fitting.”

“Kaveh? Nah. I mean we’re close, but not like that. He’s got a lot going on that he needs to sort out before he tries dating anybody, especially me. It would never work.” You didn’t seem flustered, which made him even more uncomfortable than he was before.

“Oh? Too much baggage? I see.” Why did he feel a little wounded by that? He’d ignore it for the moment.

“No, I don’t think there’s such a thing. It’s more so how he chooses to deal with his problems- or really how he refuses to. We work through things differently. He makes a great friend, but we’re fundamentally different people when you get down to brass tacks.”

Why did you have to be so reasonable? It was getting on his nerves. “Really now? But don’t opposites attract? And he’s easy on the eyes, I’ll give him that. And he’s your age, right?”

“Gods, why don’t you date him then? Sounds like you’ve got a whole lot to say about him. I can even set you two up, my treat. And back up, what do you mean he’s ‘around my age’? So are you, I don’t see how that’s a differentiating factor. Unless you aren’t- how old are you anyway?” You fully faced him then, illuminated in the orangey glow of your desk lamp.

“Wouldn’t you like to know? Older than the two of you, for certain.” He smiled placidly. “Anyway, he’s not my type. He’s too… kind. Being around him would make anybody feel awful. But again, you two-“

“Drop it already,” you cut him off decidedly. “It feels like you’re deflecting. If you’re going to fish for something, at least be direct.”

“I’m only pointing out the obvious. What, you think I’d tell him? I mean-“

“I said drop it. You’ve already beaten the subject to death and back, can you please just let it-“

“Make me.” The phrase had escaped him before he registered it. Something about seeing you so irritated with him made his pulse quicken. The look on your face was one he was well acquainted with- you were ready to bite back. There was a moment of pause, the two of you locked in a tense silence that filled every corner of the room.

“So that’s what you want. Huh.” He watched something in your eyes change as you mulled over your thoughts. In a second you were even closer- the image of a rishboland tiger crossed his mind for a moment. He began to wonder if he really had messed up this time, if he’d completely ruined your net zero relationship with such a silly little outburst, if you’d finally tell Nahida you were done and-

Your hands were so warm against his skin. How you murmured his name carried the same heat. “May I?” It was an odd question, but the way your fingers brushed any loose strands of hair away from his face had him nodding without a thought to the contrary. He wasn’t used to someone asking him for permission for anything- hell, he didn’t know what you were asking for. All the same, he knew he lwanted whatever you were offering.

The kiss that ensued was bruising. While he was accustomed to others being rough with him, something about this was different. When you brushed your thumbs over his cheekbones soothingly before carding through his choppy bangs, he felt nothing short of delight. You were handling him as you always did. For someone who didn’t need to breathe, he seemed to have the wind knocked out of him. After a short while he realized he’d grabbed onto your shoulders so tightly his fingertips ached- he had no idea when he’d taken hold of you, but you made no effort to pull away from his harsh grasp. His efforts at reciprocating were very clearly unpracticed, but by the gods did he ever have enthusiasm. He was all teeth and nails; he had no idea if he was even capable of gentleness after so many years. Even so he tried desperately, pulling at you, pushing you into him, doing everything in his power to convey just how badly he wanted whatever this was.

“Hey, hey. Relax. I’m right here. I’ve got you,” your words nearly made him keel over, each one spoken against his skin as you worked your way down the column of his throat. You treated him like he was something to be revered by virtue of his very existence. Is this what it felt like to be worshiped as a god? No, he knew better than that nowadays. This was something sweeter, even more devout- and he would’ve died right that second had you asked him to. “Is this alright?” Once again he nodded without hesitation, afraid that his voice might betray just how badly he needed you to keep going. He wanted to scream, to maintain his composure enough to insult you and save face, but any attempts at that were a lost cause.

When you sank your teeth into his skin he thought maybe he’d died already. Physical pain was an old acquaintance of his, a familiar companion he took a sort of sick comfort in. This time though the sensation had him teetering on an edge he’d never conceived of. You’d made quick work of his hat already, and with nothing left to hide behind he knew he had to look so pathetic. But you didn’t laugh at him; for all your previous sharp words and pointed jabs, in that moment you were so good to him it made him ache. It was humiliating. He wanted to hide, to crawl back into his own skin and recompose himself. Simultaneously he could only think of chasing after you for more.

You took your time marking along his neck, glancing up at him for silent permission before beginning each new bruise. He figured you had to be some variety of insane to want him this way (or in any way for that matter), but he couldn’t find the strength to tell you so. He felt weak, and for that he loathed you. At the same time he wished he could crack open his ribs and house you in the hollow space where his heart should’ve been. The way he ceaselessly pulled at you only made that more and more apparent. He wasn’t alone in his desire, though. Your methodical pace and mumbled string of praises told him that you may even agree to be enshrined within him- of course he’d never say so, instead resigning himself to breathless sighs and noises he’d only ever describe as pitiful.

When you finally backed off he attempted to chase after your touch. He was a mess and he knew it; with mussed hair and bruised lips, he looked every bit as weak as he felt but he couldn’t be bothered to care. He’d endure the humiliation of being perceived so long as you’d show him you wanted him.

“I have to finish editing your paper,” you murmured, brushing down the mess you’d made of his bangs.

“Wha- who cares about the paper?” It wasn’t as much of a quip as he’d intended, but it would have to suffice.

“I care about it. I want your work to do well. You deserve it.”

He opened his mouth to protest, but no sound escaped.

“Give me that fifteen minutes, that’s all. Deal?”

For once, he couldn’t bring himself to argue with you.

——————————————————————————

So uh. Idk what happened here. I am unwell over him I will not lie. I’m currently stoned out of my mind enjoy this tho

Tag list: @v-anrouge @vtoriacore @phoneymedic @gum-gum-time @heatofmyexoheart (DM to be added or to be removed ! <3)

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