He could hit me with his car going 115mph and I’d still get my ass up and thank him

Danny Devito is lowkey a girlboss

Bitches will be like “my ship just got confirmed” and then show you a single low-res frame of ambiguous origin where the characters walk out of a room together. It’s me. I am bitches.

I’m literally a jacked muscular superhero who gets all the bitches

I may be autistic, depressed, and have a chaotic attachment style but bbg i can be funny as hell about it