fishpunsarelife
La'gaan: Of/fish/ally On Land
A Lagoon Boy RP blog (Fish puns and a grumpy atlantean in abundance) icon by @rose-wilson-worth
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...I both hate this and love this. This looks like something Blubber would try to make.
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“kill them with kindness” WRONG. FISH🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟
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I'm just gonna leave this here.
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You're my favorite grumpy boy 💜
Okay? Thanks? (Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate that some people like me as I am, but I just don’t really know how to respond to this.)
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You are cute! That is all. And don't deny it!
Ha! XD! I love bugging you!
Nope. Lies. Not cute. No way, no how.
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How much crab would it take for you to lovingly stroke a sunfish?
WHAT.
YOU JUST
That is just
NO.
Nnnnnnnnnooooooooooooooo.
Ahr. Ochi. Nein. Nyet. Iie. Non. NOOOOOOOOOOOO.
That is the worst bait-and-switch. EVER. EVER.
You could not PAY ME anywhere NEAR ENOUGH to even THINK about-
UGH. So daekaara gross. I can’t. UUUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!
And AFTER THE CRAB?! Are you TRYING TO MAKE ME NAUSEOUS?!
“Oh yeah, here’s a huge pile of crab, enjoy and eat it to your heart’s content-- BUT! You have to touch a sunfish after!”
NO THANK YOU.
#La'gaan#Lagoon Boy#Aquaman III#Ask Away#crabs#sunfish#the very idea is cruel anon#that's the worst theoretical betrayal#favorite food versus most-disgusting-waste-of-space-to-exist#RUUUUUDE#Atlantean
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Hey La'gaan, how familiar are you with human anatomy? If you need to take a refresher course, you're more than welcome to study me ;)
No. Nope. Nope nope nope nope nope.
I am not doing this today.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Not. Happening.
(Cho ein’niya tzau’esh mou? Seriously. WTF.)
Atlanteans are technically human for Neptune’s sake!!! (Even if our physiology is a lot more varied.)
...Why am I even entertaining a single part of this ask, even though I know that wasn’t what anon meant?! UUUUUUGGGGGGHHHH!
....
......
....
I’m going to go bother my partners and eat some crab.
#La'gaan#Lagoon Boy#Aquaman#Ask Away#Atlantean#I'm not a medic!#yes my sub-focus at the Conservatory was healing magic#so I know more than most people#But! I! Am! Not! A! Doctor! And! I! Never! Want! To! Be!#and trying to make a pass at me LIKE THIS?!#as;lkdjf;sdhf;sjdflj#this is how I die
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Whalermelon sharks 🍉🦈
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this painting is maybe very big
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What fish tastes the worst to you?
Ugh... Coelacanth or dreamfish. Both of which I tried when I was waaaaayyyyy younger and didn't know any better. 0 out of 10, do not recommend.
Coelacanth is just... really gross tasting (and in large enough amounts will make your guts try to purge just about everything). Think oily ammonia. It's gross.
Dreamfish wasn't as bad as far as flavors go, but the hallucinations are not worth it.
#La'gaan#Lagoon Boy#Aquaman III#Ask Away#fish#seriously just steer clear of both#they're not worth it#pretty sure coelacanths are a protected species#at the time I had no idea#kid me made some MISTAKES because I didn't know better#even thinking of it makes me feel nauseous
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89 and 101 from "Ask Me Things"?
Haaaaaaaa old asks again. (Thankfully I have all the old ask prompts tagged under ‘meme’-- so people can send in any of them and I can easily find it if I have to-- so finding [this one] wasn’t as hard as it could have been.)
ANYWAY!
89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?
. . . I don’t even have hair. I’m completely hairless. There is zero hair anywhere on me. Seriously.
I have scales and fins, but that’s it. (I don’t even want to think about what the scale equivalent of ‘curly hair’ would even look like, because the idea is just... nooooooooo. And I am NOT trying to think about twisted scales that things could easily get caught under and cause an infection. NO I don’t care if that was grammatically correct for English because the idea is just gross. Infected scale-roots are nasty.)
101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?
If I had actually answered this one when this ask was first sent in, the answer would have been an emphatic ‘NO’.
Now though... It’s not really a ‘scare’ when it was more of a pleasant surprise, y’know? (Yes, it was Coral being pregnant with the Little Fish. Yes, all of us had talked about the possibility beforehand, but we hadn’t exactly planned on it, but when it happened we were all on board. Even if I had some moments of freaking out because of my own issues.)
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In Atlantis, is there a stigma attached to fuller figures like there is on the surface? What's your opinion on them?
I could answer this straight-forward and point-blank, but I don’t that’ll get the point across as thoroughly as I know I can, so congrats– I’m coming at this sideways and pulling what I pull at my students at the Conservatory sometimes. You’re welcome. lol
So the first thing to know is that Atlantis, at our highest point, is about 200 feet/61-ish meters below the surface of the water, and at our lowest point (or what’s currently considered our lowest point) is about 660 feet/201-ish meters below the surface.
Which means our ‘normal’ temperatures? Glubbing cold.
If it’s 70°F/roughly-21°C at the surface, then it’s about 59°F/15°C at our highest point (in Poseidonis) and roughly-34°F/1°C at our lowest point. That’s in the warm months.
If it’s roughly-55°F/roughly-13°C at the surface, then it’s about 44°F/roughly-7°C in Poseidonis and roughly-19°F/-7.3°C at our lowest point. Which happens to be winter in general.
All of this is to say, being curvy/bulky/fat/whatever-description-of-choice is NOT a bad thing in Atlantis and is generally seen as pretty damned attractive. If you’re bigger, you’re not freezing. And, oh yeah–
‘FROZEN-CHIC’ IS NOT A THING.
Because you know what’s not attractive in Atlantis? Freezing to death.
(The fact that there’s so many of us on the slim side is actually reely damned weird and can probably be put down to the magic that permanently altered all of us when Atlantis was sinking doing weird shark-shit without finesse since the stress was on survival over what would be a better physical result. And if I’m being blunt, I’m practically a gods-damned twig by atlantean standards.)
So, to finally get to your questions directly:
Is there a stigma to fuller figures in Atlantis like there is on the surface? Pfffft NOPE. (If you’re too damned skinny though, people are going to worry about you freezing to death or wonder if you’re eating enough.)
What’s my opinion on them? I’ve seen plenty of bigger people who I think are incredibly hot, but I’ve already got all the partners I can handle. (And I reiterate, I’m a damned TWIG.)
(And in case you were curious, yes the surface’s whole thing with being obsessed with skinniness– skinniness? being skinny? whatever english is WEIRD– is still freaking bizarre to me.)
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You should vacuum under your bed. It's really dusty under here.
No. NOPE. Noooooooooooooo.
1) I’m not on land.
2) That’s creepy.
3) I’m not currently on land.
4) Even if you knew where I was living on land while I’m up there-- which I doubt-- there are better ways to spend your time than creeping under my bed.
5) Did I mention I’m not on land? Because I’m not on land.
6) GET OUT OF MY HOUSE.
#La'gaan#Lagoon Boy#Aquaman III#Ask Away#did I just contradict myself? Yes#do I care? NO#technically it's- no you know what?#I'm not gonna say#because I'm not going to encourage people trying to find out where I live when I'm on land
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i wanna wrap you up in blankets and put you in a corner where nobody can bully you
Ooooookayyyyyyy...
Not that I’m complaining. (This is actually one of the better asks I’ve had kicking around in my inbox.)
My partners have pretty much got it covered at this point at least. Still. Thanks I guess?
Yeah, I have no idea how to respond to this.
#La'gaan#Lagoon Boy#Aquaman III#Ask Away#at least this is a decent way to kick off asks for the day#could be a lot worse
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