english-history-trip
A Trip Through English History
Facts, pictures, and musing from the history of England.
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I regret to inform you that we have the answer to that, courtesy of Henry VIII:
hey can we uhhhhhhhhh get rid of boob armor?
and i mean in every fictional setting like fantasy, scifi, etc but here are two prime examples:
these are both………… pretty weird. i get that wonder woman’s outfit has been the same since 1941 but she still serves as a good example, and idek what’s going on with valkyrie. a lot of people praise this for being “feminine but functional” but this still means there’s some armor smith out there carefully molding breastplates to fit each individual boob (as per that one tumblr post going around that i don’t have the link to).
here’s an example of real life armor on women:
there you go. some real women wearing real armor made for real combat situations. now listen, i’ve worn this and yeah—– this shit’s functional. and no, it doesn’t squish your boobs in, no matter what you’re doing. it actually fits quite snugly despite how it looks. see how no effort was made to have individual boobs poke through? that’s because that shit ain’t necessary. in fact the breast molding would be pretty terrible for your rib cage but i’m sure you’ve all seen that post.
at least star wars got this one right:
#there is no way in hell that had any functional use#and neither did the armor heyooo anne boleyn knows what I'm talking about#more naughty bits#tudors
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hey can we uhhhhhhhhh get rid of boob armor?
and i mean in every fictional setting like fantasy, scifi, etc but here are two prime examples:
these are both………… pretty weird. i get that wonder woman’s outfit has been the same since 1941 but she still serves as a good example, and idek what’s going on with valkyrie. a lot of people praise this for being “feminine but functional” but this still means there’s some armor smith out there carefully molding breastplates to fit each individual boob (as per that one tumblr post going around that i don’t have the link to).
here’s an example of real life armor on women:
there you go. some real women wearing real armor made for real combat situations. now listen, i’ve worn this and yeah—– this shit’s functional. and no, it doesn’t squish your boobs in, no matter what you’re doing. it actually fits quite snugly despite how it looks. see how no effort was made to have individual boobs poke through? that’s because that shit ain’t necessary. in fact the breast molding would be pretty terrible for your rib cage but i’m sure you’ve all seen that post.
at least star wars got this one right:
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Black Satin Brocade Bodice with Yellow Flowers and Green Velvet Bows
c.1890
made by American designer Miss Foley
brocaded silk satin, cotton net, and beads
Phoenix Art Museum
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Salamander Brooch
late 16th century-early 17th century
Museum of London
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Silk brocade sack back gown, 1776 – 1778. © The Olive Matthews Collection, Chertsey Museum. Photo by John Chase Photography.
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Hey ! Tell me the no of generations of the Plantaganets participated in wars of the roses
Uhhhhhhhhhh
Depends whether you count it kicking off with the deposition of Richard II or Henry VI. If the latter, about three: the claimants, their parents, and their children.
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hello????
#second instance I know of an english king naming his kid after his blorbo#the other being henry iii naming his son for edward the confessor#if there are any others pls lmk#I'd love there to be enough for like a masterpost#plantagenets#arthurian legend
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... the Lord is testing me.
(Specifically, the Getty Museum shop is testing me)
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#charles tripped over his own foot and is out cold while frank and hank slappyslapp it out#tudors#nonsense#hot takes#charles died of incest poisoning
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“The wheel has come full circle. I am here.”
– King Lear, Act V, Scene iii
William Shakespeare is believed to have both been born and died on this day (April 23) in 1564 and 1616, respectively. His astonishing body of work has become one of the most enduring legacies of England and its language.
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[Un]conscionably, Tolkien's works have been severely underrepresented in the world of Tumblr sexymen. Now is[n't] the time to change that.
On a related note, did you know there is a Sexypedia Wiki? The research I do for these polls continues to surprise.
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I don't know what paddington is doing on that list, but it made me think of the time someone drew a picture of the queen with paddington after she died, and we had scores of people losing their minds at the idea that paddington bear wasn't the same kind of communist as them
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Happy Passover, here's the oldest illustrated Haggadah, which in keeping with the Middle Ages, makes the obvious choice of giving everyone bird's heads.
One theory is that it was a way to obey the commandment against graven images, specifically of humans. The pointed hats were used as a device by Jewish and Christian illustrators alike to denote Jewish characters; some parts of Europe mandated that Jews wear these hats to distinguish themselves from their gentile neighbors.
Girls don’t want boys, girls want a facsimile edition of the “Birds’ Head Haggadah” (Southern Germany, c. 1300)
Image from the Israel Museum: https://www.imj.org.il/en/collections/199815-0
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Its armor and weapons or massive bling - there's no in between with this kid. She finally approves of the dress.
Tunic is linen from armstreet. Dress is made from bargain bin knit fabic with a fulled appearance to conceal the weave. Panel is cotton with brocaded trim, and beads are plastic so I won't regret if they break. Is it a bit overboard? Yeah, but if it gets her to play then cool beans. Now I need to make something for the wife to complete a full family outfit in norse theme. I look forward to being finished so we can maybe pay a visit to to the land of liripipes next
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