Shinrei Tantei Yakumo volume 6.5 - Unexpressed Feelings
Shinrei Tantei Yakumo novel translation
Volume 6.5 — Unexpressed Feelings
(JP-EN Translation by @cleverwolfpoetry - Editing & Scans by Zel)
Haruka was on her way to the Movie Research Circle clubroom, her objective none other than to meet Yakumo. However, before she reached the clubroom, Yakumo’s figure caught her eye in an unexpected situation. Distressed by this fact, what would Haruka do...!? (file 02: “Message”), as well as an alternate version of the short story “Repayment”, which depicted the aftermath of the case included at the end of the third volume of the bunko, in a reader-only special edition. Two small episodes from a time when the distance between Yakumo and Haruka was still awkward.
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file 01 - repayment
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It had been a week since that case.
Haruka made her way towards the Movie Research Circle clubroom located in the building behind building B.
Not that there was any trouble to bring. However, today marked the end of all classes for the first semester, and the university was set to begin its summer break the following day. Besides that, she wanted to see Yakumo's sulky face.
“Hey–”
When Haruka opened the door, Yakumo was about to leave the room.
Suddenly finding herself face to face with him, she got flustered for no reason.
“What's up with you?”
Yakumo said, yawning loudly.
“Are you going out?”
“Yeah. I've got some unfinished business from the last case.”
Yakumo was scratching his head as if it was really troublesome.
“By the last case, is it Kamiyama-san's?”
“Yeah.”
“Isn’t that case already closed?”
“Not yet. I have to return this.”
Yakumo raised the diary he’d been holding in his right hand, showing it to Haruka.
“Oh.”
— That is Rika-san's diary.
The one Haruka had borrowed from Rika's father. The sorrowful expression painted on that man’s face came back to her mind. At the same time, Haruka remembered the promise she had made to him.
‘I'm going to find out why Rika died—’ she had told him back then.
“I’m coming too,”
Haruka declared, staring into Yakumo's eyes.
To tell the truth, she didn’t feel comfortable meeting Rika's father again. That man believed that his daughter hadn’t committed suicide. And yet, the truth was different.
I don't know what to say to him when we meet. Any words of comfort would sound meaningless.
Even so, I must meet him — that was how she felt.
“Suit yourself,” said Yakumo, sighing exaggeratedly following a brief annoyance on his face.
* * *
Haruka took the train, got off at the station of the town where Rika's father lived, and walked beside Yakumo along the railway line.
She took a glance at Yakumo's profile, walking with no emotion showing on his face.
Back then, while she had hurt and crumbled apart, Yakumo had gently pulled Haruka's head to his chest.
At that moment, an array of emotions had mixed within her and without knowing why, she had buried her face in his chest and cried. Remembering it now, she suddenly felt embarrassed and blushed all the way to her ears.
“What's wrong?”
Being called out by Yakumo made her heart skip a beat.
“Nothing.”
“It’s fine that you like to eat, but you should be moderate about it.”
— What kind of misunderstanding could have led to that conclusion?
She had thought about saying something back, but there was no way she could say what she was really thinking, so she silently chased Yakumo's back as he swiftly walked.
When they reached the front of the apartment, a doubtful expression appeared on Yakumo’s face.
“What's wrong?”
Yakumo pressed the intercom without answering Haruka's question.
A moment later, Rika's father appeared from inside the house. He looked so exhausted that Haruka wondered if he was still alive.
Yakumo stared at him silently, as if observing him.
“Um…please, excuse me for the other day. I came to return the diary.”
Haruka spoke up with a tense expression.
The man silently entered the room, leaving the door open. She turned her eyes on Yakumo, unsure of what to do. Yakumo took off his shoes and went inside the house, as if this was perfectly normal.
— I wonder if this is okay.
Haruka followed Yakumo's lead, although still hesitant.
She entered the same tatami room as her last visit and sat down facing the old man across the Japanese floor table.
Yakumo entered the room, but instead of sitting down, he kept looking around. It was as if there was something there —
“Yakumo-kun. The diary.” Haruka urged, unable to bear it anymore.
“Yeah.”
Yakumo replied shortly and put the diary on the table.
The old man took the diary with both hands and placed it on his crossed legs like it was his own beloved child.
It was going to be painful, but now that she was involved in it, she had to tell him the truth about Rika's suicide.
“Um...about Rika-san...”
He shook his head, as if to stop Haruka’s words.
“I’ve already heard it.”
His voice sounded as if it was about to fade away at any moment.
“I see…”
“Yesterday, a detective called Gotou-san came to see me.”
— I see, so Gotou-san did.
“That detective said he was sorry and got down on his knees right here to apologise. But even if he did that, Rika won't come back …”
He said in a trembling voice, clawing at the tatami.
She understood Gotou's feelings so much that it hurt. That was the sort of man he was. He would carry everything on his back, even when it wasn’t his responsibility.
But she also understood what Rika's father had said. No matter how much Gotou bowed down, it would be all too late.
“Your death will not bring Rika-san back.”
Yakumo said, turning his sharp gaze on him.
— What is he saying out of nowhere?
Contrary to Haruka's confusion, Rika's father looked up in surprise. His eyes were saying that Yakumo had hit the mark.
“I…”
“You intend to die.”
“What are you talking about?”
“In that case, let me ask you, why is the room window closed? And why is there duct tape on the window frame?”
“What I do is none of your business.”
Rika's father said indifferently.
“It doesn't work like that.”
Rika's father looked up in surprise at Yakumo's words.
“Because of you, there are spirits unable to rest in peace.”
“Because of me…”
Rika's father looked puzzled.
Yakumo nodded firmly and pointed to a corner of the room. Haruka couldn’t see anything, but such wasn’t the case for Yakumo.
“Rika-san and your wife are watching you all the time.”
Yakumo said quietly after a short silence.
“What nonsense…”
Rika's father turned his face away grimly.
“It isn’t nonsense. Yakumo-kun can see them,”
Haruka said without thinking.
She glanced at Yakumo. Yakumo had noticed this and remained silent. Haruka arbitrarily interpreted it as an approval response and continued the conversation.
“It may be hard to believe, but Yakumo-kun can see the spirits of the dead.”
“You can see them?”
“Yes. Otherwise, I wouldn't have been able to uncover the truth behind the case.”
“Are Rika and Satoko really here?”
Rika's father looked around the room restlessly, to which Yakumo replied shortly, “Yes.”
“What are they saying?”
Rika's father asked, clinging to Yakumo.
“It's still too early…”
“Early?”
“Yes. You still have things to do.”
“Things to do…like what?"
“It's something only you can do."
Yakumo said, then narrowed his eyes.
After coming here, Yakumo's true intentions had finally become clear to Haruka. Thanks to their relationship so far, she had thought she knew more about Yakumo than other people. This expression—.
“I have lost my daughter, my wife, and my job. There’s nothing an old man like me can do…”
Rika's father bit his lower lip and hung his head weakly.
“Please, help those who are suffering the same way as Rika-san.”
Haruka pleaded with him.
“I couldn't help my daughter.”
“That's why, this time you can help her. That is something only you can do. And it's also what Rika-san and your wife want.”
Yakumo's tone was detached, but his eyes were full of kindness.
It reminded her of the words Yakumo had said before. Even beyond the pitch-black darkness, a small light could be seen. Perhaps, it was because darkness existed that light could shine.
“They won’t let me die so easily, will they? My wife and daughter are really strict on me …” Rika's father muttered, and let his tears fall onto the tatami mat drop by drop.
Yakumo waited for him to regain his composure before calling out, “Let's go.”
Haruka bowed repeatedly to Rika's father and left the apartment with Yakumo.
On the road along the railway line, while heading towards the station, Haruka turned towards Yakumo's back and began to speak.
“Hey. You lied earlier, didn't you?”
“Don't go around saying disreputable things about people.”
Yakumo also stopped and scratched his head in annoyance.
“Don’t play dumb.”
“I'm not playing dumb. His wife and his daughter Rika-san really were there.”
— Is that so?
She thought she had read the emotions from Yakumo's expression, yet had she been mistaken? But it didn't make any sense.
“Tell me the truth.”
“It's the truth. They both wouldn’t have wanted him to die.”
“Then—”
“However, I just didn't know how to persuade him.”
“There it is, I knew you were lying.”
“Why would you say that?”
“Because, you said…they want him to help people who are suffering the same way as Rika-san…”
“As expected, you're an idiot.” said Yakumo, interrupting Haruka's words.
“What do you mean by idiot!”
“The one who said that wasn’t me. It was you.”
“Ah–” She thought about what Yakumo had said. That was right. Yakumo had only said, ‘You still have things to do.’
It was Haruka herself who had said she wanted him to help others who experienced the same suffering.
“Well, even lying can be the means to an end. We both wanted him not to die, so all is good.”
Yakumo yawned as he walked away.
— Right. Whatever form they took, feelings have been understood, so that's good.
Haruka began to walk after Yakumo's back.
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file 02 - message
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The heat had been oppressive since morning.
Despite this, Haruka made her way to the Movie Research Circle clubroom, located in the building behind university building B.
She was going there to meet Saitou Yakumo.
But to her surprise, upon arriving at the courtyard, she spotted him there.
He was sitting on a bench at the base of an oak tree, eyes fixed on his feet.
Haruka was about to call out to him, but her movement stopped, as if she had been touched by something hot.
Next to him was a young woman.
She was about Haruka's age. She had long chestnut hair and her face was long, but she was a beautiful girl with clear cut features.
Her hands were clenched tightly in her lap. Her shoulders were shaking, and she looked angry.
— Who’s that girl? What are they talking about?
Haruka would have wanted to know, but the air between them was so tense and unapproachable that she couldn't get any closer.
Then Yakumo looked up and said something.
But Haruka could not hear him.
The girl next to Yakumo looked surprised, then stood up, scrubbing her eyes hard with both hands.
Her posture was as rigid as a model's.
“You said you loved me ... you liar!”
Her cries made Haruka's heart clench.
— Is this a love quarrel?
From the circumstances, it seemed that Yakumo had talked about breaking up with the girl. He hadn’t said a single word about this person.
Yakumo had no obligation to tell every single thing to Haruka, yet she felt somewhat betrayed.
Amidst Haruka’s confusion, the girl quickly walked away from Yakumo.
“Are you spying on me again?”
Yakumo raised his head and turned his gaze at Haruka.
At the sudden words, she jumped involuntarily.
Yakumo slowly walked over to Haruka, his face contorted as if he wanted to say, 'good grief'.
This man is pretending to be calm while acting like he’s in a love drama and making a woman cry. That attitude made Haruka somewhat angry.
“Hey, that's just awful.”
Without knowing the circumstances, she protested to Yakumo.
No, I don't need to know the circumstances to understand. It’s obvious that it’s Yakumo's fault.
“It's not my fault.”
“You’re the worst.”
“I don't really care what you think. But you best go and look for her.”
“Why me?”
“You're partly to blame.”
“Me ...”
— Why should I be responsible for Yakumo breaking up with his lover?
“Yeah.”
“Hey, wait a moment!”
Ignoring Haruka’s voice calling out to him, Yakumo ran off quickly.
— What?! What the hell?
“I don't know anything.”
Haruka said to Yakumo's back, but it seemed irresponsible to leave things like that.
— Ugh, this is the worst.
Muttering in her head, Haruka started looking for the girl.
Since she had only seen her for a moment, she wasn't sure if she would be able to find her, but she entered Building B right away and searched the empty classrooms one by one, starting with the ground floor.
—You're partly to blame.
Yakumo's words played over and over in her head. What on earth did that mean?
— Did they break up because of me?
The moment she thought that, her face suddenly became hot.
— No, that’s not it. This must be from the summer heat.
While convincing herself, Haruka continued to search for the girl.
After looking in all the classrooms, she found herself in front of the door leading to the roof of Building B.
This was the place where she had been taken months ago, during the first case she had been involved in with Yakumo. If Yakumo hadn’t come to save her then, Haruka would be dead by now.
Thinking back on this, she opened the door.
There she saw the back of a girl.
Despite only seeing her from behind, there was no mistaking her long, shiny chestnut hair.
She had her arms crossed over the iron railing on the rooftop, her face resting on it, gazing at the cityscape stretching out below her eyes.
A warm breeze ruffled her chestnut hair.
— It's good that I found her, but what am I supposed to do now?
Lost in her thoughts, Haruka slowly walked towards the girl’s back.
“Um ...”
When Haruka called out to her, she turned around in surprise.
Her eyes swollen from crying were red, but she seemed to have regained some of her composure.
“… what is it?”
The girl’s eyes narrowed as if she was trying to get an answer out of Haruka.
“Yakumo-kun told me to come and find you …”
“...I see. I blurted out all of a sudden, didn't I? I've done something awful. He didn't do anything wrong ...”
She looked down in embarrassment and scratched her nose. It was a sad expression that made it even more painful for Haruka to watch.
“You should forget such a blunt person as soon as possible.”
Haruka said without thinking.
The girl looked surprised for a moment, but then she seemed to have guessed something and started laughing out loud.
“Did I say something funny?”
“No, it’s that you've got it completely wrong.”
The girl shrugged.
“Completely wrong?”
“Yes. Saitou-san was just passing me a message.”
“What?”
“The last message from him.”
“The last ...”
“Yes. My boyfriend has gone to a distant place …”
The girl narrowed her eyes and looked up at the sky, where the clouds were rising.
“Ah!”
Haruka unintentionally raised her voice.
It was only at that moment that the situation sank in for Haruka. Yakumo had only told her the words of her dead lover.
Haruka, who had only overheard part of the conversation, seemed to have misunderstood terribly. Her body burned with embarrassment —
“That person ...”
The girl began to speak, leaning against the iron fence.
“He wants me to forget him and be happy. I can't do that. After all, I loved him ...”
Teardrops fell from the girl’s eyes.
I don't know the details of the situation, but I do know a little about how women feel. It's impossible to forget someone you’ve loved.
“That's true. Once you know, you can't forget, can you?”
Haruka said in a whisper.
“Right. I've made up my mind. I will be happy for that person. But, you see ...”
“But?”
“I'll never forget him!”
The girl cried out loudly to the sky.
It was a voice so overwhelmingly full of feelings. The sound of her voice struck a chord in Haruka's heart, and without realising it, she almost burst into tears.
“Ah, I feel better.”
After a moment of silence, the girl said with a cheerful expression.
“I'm sure he heard it.”
There was no proof, but that was Haruka's honest impression.
“Thank you. Thank Saitou-san as well.”
The girl said, walking away with firm steps.
* * *
After watching the girl leave, Haruka made her appearance in the Movie Research Circle clubroom, located in the prefabricated building behind Building B.
Yakumo was sitting in his usual chair, reading a book with a thoughtful expression on his face.
“Did you find her?”
Yakumo said, his eyes remaining fixated on the book.
What a decent attitude to have after you dropped everything on me.
“Yup.”
Haruka let out a sigh and sat down in the chair across Yakumo.
“So?”
Yakumo urged her to continue.
“ ‘I'll be happy for my lover,’ she said. And thank Yakumo-kun as well…”
“I see ...”
Yakumo seemed to have understood everything and nodded in agreement.
But there was still something that Haruka was not convinced of. In the courtyard, Yakumo had said, ‘You're partly to blame’.
At that time, I had a slight misunderstanding, and I did what I was told to look for the girl, but to be honest, I was not convinced.
“Hey, you said I was partly to blame, didn’t you?”
“Yeah.”
Yakumo slammed the book shut and looked up.
“Why am I responsible for this?”
“When I was about to go after her, you strangely got it all wrong, and came on to me. That's why I couldn't go after her."
— What an absurd theory.
“In that case, I don't think you can blame me for the misunderstanding.”
“Why?”
“Because she said you loved her, and she said you were a liar ...”
“I didn’t say those things.”
“But ...”
“Did you think I had a lover?”
Yakumo narrowed his eyes.
It was a somewhat embarrassing question.
“If I asked you, would you tell me?”
“It depends.”
Yakumo said vaguely and slowly got up from his seat.
“Are you going somewhere?”
“To the sea.”
“The sea?”
“The sea was the place where he died. I'll tell him what she said.”
— Oh, I see.
If you convey her words to him, he will be able to rest in peace, even though he has been wandering in this world.
“Hey, can I come too?”
“Suit yourself.”
Yakumo said carelessly and left the room. Haruka nodded vigorously and followed him. When they went outside, the sky was blue as far as the eye could see — .
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Shinrei Tantei Yakumo Another Files - The Dead’s Wish - epilogue
Shinrei Tantei Yakumo novel translation
Another Files - The Dead’s Wish
( first | prev )
epilogue - afterwards
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Haruka sat on the chair with nerves on edge.
Despite having participated in recitals many times, she could never get used to them.
From the stage lit by the spotlight, her eyes wandered across the audience seats.
Lights in the audience seating area had been dimmed, so even if she saw people enter, she wouldn’t be able to tell them apart.
Haruka had informed Yakumo about this recital, yet Yakumo’s response had remained vague to the end.
It wasn’t clear whether he would come.
Considering the Yakumo that Haruka knew, that man likely wouldn’t come to watch her recital. That was Haruka’s thought.
Yet on the other hand, she had hopes that perhaps Yakumo might come.
Rather than feeling uncertain like this, she should’ve forced Yakumo to give a definite answer, but it was too late for regret now.
Haruka turned towards Watanabe, sitting at the end of the same row as her.
While other members were occupied with checking their music scores for the final time, or adjusting their musical instruments, Watanabe was repeatedly checking the audience.
He might have had the same thoughts as Haruka.
The envelope Aki had returned the other day must have contained tickets to today’s recital.
Watanabe appeared concerned, but Aki should be somewhere in the audience. Though she had no basis for it, Haruka felt that way.
While Haruka was lost in her mundane thoughts, the conductor emerged from backstage, welcomed with applause from the audience.
The conductor signalled for everyone to stand up.
Haruka rose from her seat in unison with her fellow orchestra circle members and bowed once towards the audience.
As she sat down, Haruka exhaled deeply.
She couldn’t keep thinking about other matters. Right now, she had to concentrate on the recital.
Throughout the preparation leading to this recital, various things happened that led to Haruka having to excuse herself from a lot of rehearsals, so she honestly had no confidence to perform.
Even so, to the people coming to listen to their performance, such things were unrelated.
Besides, this was an orchestra performance. Things wouldn’t get solved by blaming herself over mistakes she made.
She had to play to the best of her ability.
As if waiting for Haruka to firm her resolve, the conductor then lifted his baton.
Everyone audibly drew their breaths in unison.
While tense, Haruka liked this moment.
The moment when a recital was about to start.
The conductor swung his baton.
With it, the performance began.
***
After the recital was over, from the corner of her eye Haruka could see a few members who had been talking with their instruments on hand began stowing away their equipment.
The recital itself had safely ended without trouble.
However, the dance routine—included due to the fact that this had been a recital on the campus festival—had been a complete disaster.
Haruka wasn’t particularly great at coordinating her body to begin with, and her lack of practice had made it worse.
She had remembered the moves, yet her movement had been so stiff even she herself could tell.
In her panicked attempts of adjusting her tense body, Haruka had ended up tripping on her own foot, falling down spectacularly as a result.
An utter failure.
Laughter exploded from the audience, and Haruka had felt as if her face was spewing fire.
“Ozawa-san, you really stood out back there.”
“What a splendid way to fall down.”
Upon returning backstage, she was teased relentlessly by other members.
Absolutely horrible—
Furthermore, despite being an orchestra circle, they had to perform a mysterious dance popularly seen on a television drama.
Not to mention they had to wear cat ears—
Even though they did this every year, this was the first time Haruka wanted to run away from her responsibilities.
Prior to the recital, she had been curious whether Yakumo had attended. But now, for the first time she hoped that he hadn’t.
“I’ll be on my way,” Having finished packing her belongings, Haruka left the waiting area.
The others had still been mocking her over her falling incident, so she promptly escaped with a bitter laugh.
She glanced at her watch.
There wasn’t much time left.
After this, she was going to watch the theatre circle’s stage play held at the auditorium.
The timing was barely enough.
Haruka began running faster towards the campus auditorium, but stopped her steps in front of the campus courtyard.
She witnessed Aki’s figure, sitting on a bench just like when Haruka had seen her for the first time.
Next to her was Watanabe.
He was still holding onto his musical instrument.
After the recital had ended, he must have ran after Aki who had been watching the performance.
Haruka couldn’t hear what they were talking about, but a smile faintly appeared on Aki’s face.
Haruka felt relieved and smiled as well without realising.
Uh oh, now’s not the time to space out. I’m going to be late.
Haruka quickly headed to the auditorium.
Yakumo had already been waiting for her in front of the entrance.
”You’re slow,” he said with a sigh upon seeing Haruka.
“Sorry,” apologised Haruka sincerely.
At that moment she noticed familiar faces.
Gotou and Ishii were next to Yakumo.
“Hey,” Gotou shouted as he casually waved. On the other hand, Ishii called out to her, purposely dragging out his words, “Haruka-chaaan!”
“So Gotou-san and Ishii-san came along too.”
“That’s right. Since we’ve been dragged to work on this and that, I thought we might as well come to watch.” replied Gotou.
It was true that Gotou and Ishii had been a great help during the theatre circle case. So it would be understandable for them wanting to know how things were going afterwards.
She understood that, yet at the same time, a question she had long since forgotten about resurfaced.
“By the way, what happened to Iida-san afterwards?”
Iida had been the culprit that had deliberately collapsed the set and injured Tomoko.
“He obediently admitted to his actions now. The charges are for bodily harm.”
“That’s a relief to hear.”
“Then, Daichi will soon be handed over to a prosecutor.”
“Is that so...”
Various feelings muddled within Haruka.
Daichi’s lover had practically been murdered. Haruka understood the depths of his resentment and grief. However, Daichi had chosen the wrong path by pursuing revenge.
While he deserved punishment, the whole thing had left an unpleasant taste.
“Also, I think Sakamoto and Fujimoto will be prosecuted for charges of causing death by negligence in duty of care.”
“Eh?”
“Because of testimonies from Daichi and that student named Natsuki, they finally admitted to it as well.”
Haruka’s heart felt lighter after hearing Gotou’s explanation.
They were going to be prosecuted, but most importantly, they had admitted to their actions, a sign that they had the willingness to repent.
Haruka felt it was a salvation that they could at least obtain.
“Just how long are you guys planning to hang around here?” asked Yakumo, returning Haruka to her senses.
If they didn’t hurry, the stage play would soon begin.
All of them quickly entered the auditorium.
It was free seating, but because they had come in late, they had to sit all the way at the back. Luckily, they managed to secure four adjacent empty seats.
Yakumo sat closest to the aisle. Next to him consecutively were Haruka, Ishii, and then Gotou.
“Is Haruka-chan’s circle going to do a recital or the like as well?” asked Ishii when the situation grew calmer.
What Haruka had just forgotten returned to her mind.
“Ah, it was already over.”
“Is that so...I would’ve wanted to go and watch...” Ishii hung his head in regret.
Such a huge disaster wasn’t something Haruka wanted to show.
“Ishii-san, in my opinion, you should be grateful you didn’t go to watch it,” added Yakumo.
“Why?” Ishii asked in return.
“Not only was she wearing cat ears at that age, she also performed a dance that made me wanted to close my eyes, and then fell spectacularly to top it all off—”
So he did come watch after all!
Haruka was happy that Yakumo had come to watch her recital. Yet at the same time, she was embarrassed by the fact that Yakumo had seen her in such a state.
“No…that...”
Haruka wanted to make excuses, but Yakumo held his index finger against his mouth and shushed. “Sshh.”
The audience seat lights had already been dimmed.
Haruka felt troubled by various things, but for now she decided to simply concentrate on the stage play.
Haruka then turned her eyes towards the stage—
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