things that take time:

- loving yourself

- meaningful relationships

- accepting who you are

- recovery

- healing from heartbreak

- changing habits

- improving at a skill

- achieving your goals

- :)

High functioning Depression Problem #39

You know these moments when you really want to scream and cry your eyes out, but you physically can’t, because you are dead inside.

Я плакал в день моей крови Там не было ничего, что я Может держать��я Только линия могла бы помочь Напомни мне о тебе, о тебе Я кричал, пока не пришла кровь Я жил в облаке надежды Поцелуй любовника, тогда они загадывают желание До конца они притворяются Каждый день болит немного больше Каждый день болит немного больше И я сделаю все Да я все сделаю Принадлежать Быть сильным Сказать, что нет ничего плохого Каждый день болит немного больше Каждый день болит немного больше И я сделаю все Да я все сделаю Принадлежать Быть сильным Сказать, что нет ничего плохого Каждый день болит Я плакала на солнце Буду ли я притворяться, что любил тебя Просто чтобы сыграть в игру с тобой С тобой Мне нужно верить тебе Пожертвовал всей ложью, которую мы составили Как мы поцеловались, то загадали желание до конца, до конца Каждый день болит немного больше Каждый день болит немного больше И я сделаю все Да я все сделаю Принадлежать Быть сильным Сказать, что нет ничего плохого Каждый день болит немного больше Каждый день болит немного больше И я сделаю все Да я все сделаю Принадлежать Быть сильным Сказать, что нет ничего плохого Каждый день болит Время заставило меня довериться тебе Слова, которые вы мне продали, были надуманными Теперь ничто не может проглотить Чувство так мелко внутри

- :)

Espero quedarme dormido lentamente y nunca despertar

- :)

Heaven’s Gate This group was founded in 1974 by Marshall Applewhite and Bonnie Nettles. They met in 1972 and believed that they were “The Two” from Revelation 11. They began to recruit followers in 1975, arranging gatherings in Oregon and California. Those that decided to follow them would detach themselves from society, and ultimately their family and friends, and prepare to transition to a “higher level” of life. In 1985, Bonnie died leaving the responsibilities up to Marshall. The group lived in Texas to learn disciplines and other teachings to help them for when they moved on to the “higher level”. In 1996 the group moved to San Diego, California where they further spread their teachings by sharing them on the Web. Marshall concluded that on March 19, 1997 that the earth was going to end, so he rented a mansion in San Diego for him and his 38 followers to spend their last day on Earth. He told them that these UFOs would come down and take their bodies home so the Aliens would put life into them. He gave all his followers applesauce with poison mixed in and they all wrapped plastic bags over their heads to make sure they didn’t wake up. They all lied down with purple cloth draped over them, police finding all 39 dead the next day. Los Narcosatánicos Adolfo Constanzo, nicknamed “The Godfather”, lead his cult of cartels on a ranch in Matamoros. This cult used a form of Black Magic known as Palo Mayombe because they believed it would give them supernatural powers like keeping them hidden from the police. They would do sacrificial killings in a shed on the ranch where they would suck the blood of the victims, gutted them, and sawtimize them with a machete. On April 1, 1989, police found Adolfo and his cartels on their ranch. They thought they wouldn’t find anything and just arrest them, but after searching the ranch the police found the shed and the sight was unsettling. Inside they found melted candles and dried garlic hanging from the ceiling, people’s skin that looked worn, and four cauldrons filled with body parts and blood. It was discovered that the group had killed fifteen people and had eaten their insides. After this, Adolfo and four of his followers escaped to Mexico city where later police found Adolfo and one of his followers dead but the other three were arrested. Overall fourten cult members were arrested with murder, drug-running, and obstructing the course of justice. Ten Commandments Joseph Kibweteere founded Ten Commandments with other ex-priests, ex-nuns, and a former escort. In 1989 he began spreading the word of his teachings in Uganda and since he was wealthy compared to others in the country, he built a place for fo his religion. He prophesied that the earth would end on December 31, 1999 and he could help those who joined his religion. People that did join his cult had to give Joseph and land and resources they owned while in return they got two meals a day, security, and promise of eternal glory in heaven. You also had to give up speaking and if you were to break any rules you could be beaten or seperated from you family. If anyone were to question Joseph’s teachings they would be sentenced to death. Now when December 31 came the world didn’t end- people were confused, mad, and questioned Joseph. He then told his followers that he received a new prophecy- the Virgin Mary would come to earth on March 17, 2000 and start the apocalypse. Secretly though, Joseph and some of the other founders planned to kill the followers on that day. The day came and Joseph gathered his 778 followers in a church and splattered them with gasoline but told them it was holy water. The church was set on fire and everyone was charred beyond recognition, all 778 people died and so did Joseph Kibweteere. However the other founders went under the radar and were never seen since.

- :)

And this is how it starts

You take your shoes off in the back of my van

My shirt looks so good

When it's just hanging off your back

And she said use your hands and my spare time

We've got one thing in common it's this tongue of mine

She said she's got a boyfriend anyway

There's only minutes before I drop you off

And all we seem to do it talk about sex

She's got a boyfriend anyway

She's got a boyfriend anyway

I love your friend when I saw his film

He's got a funny face but I like that because he still looks cool

She's got a boyfriend anyway

She's got a boyfriend anyway

Now we are on the bed in my room

And I'm about to fill his shoes

But you say no

But do you say no

Does he take care of you

Or could I easily fill his shoes

Do you say no

Do you say no

And now we're just outside of town

And you're making your way down

She's got a boyfriend anyway

She's got a boyfriend anyway

And I'm not trying to stop you love

But if we're gonna do anything we might as well just fuck

She's got a boyfriend anyway

She's got a boyfriend anyway

You've got your tongue pierced anyway

You in your hightops anyway

You in your skinny jeans anyway

You and your fit friends anyway

I'd take them all out any day

They've all got back combs anyway

You've all got boyfriends anyway

- :)

i’ve been swallowing cigarettes with coffee for breakfast

and i can’t remember the last time someone told me they loved me.

i went from humming in the shower to crouching on the tiled floor heaving my lungs out

not knowing where my tears began and the water ended.

i always say goodbye to my loved ones as if that’s the last time i’m gonna see them

because

i forget to look either ways before crossing the road nowadays and

find myself almost wishing to never make it to my destination

while i’m inside a car or a plane.

i read somewhere that “you never know when the bus is coming”

so i think since then a part of me has been living in a way

as if i’m always expecting for the bus to hit

some days it’s

‘i better do everything that makes me happy and

tell everyone i love them before it hits me’

but

more often than not

it’s

‘why hasn’t it hit me yet.’

- :)

Step out into the Indian dust

I can feel the cracks in my spirit

They're starting to bust

Drive by your house, nobody's home

I'm trying to tell myself that I'm better off alone

All of my friends say I should move on

She's just another girl, don't let her stick it to your heart so hard

And of all my friends say it wasn't meant to be

And it's a great big world, she's just another girl

I went to see a fortuneteller, that was a trip

Maybe this confusion's got me losing my grip

I can't believe you're out there flying with somebody else

Now Jason's getting married in the blink of an eye

I got an invitation but I didn't reply

Tell your little brother that we put down the gloves

And give him all of my love

All of my friends say I should move on

She's just another girl, don't let her stick it to your heart so hard

And all of my friends say it wasn't meant to be

And it's a great big world, she's just another girl

I could be reeling them in left and right

Something's got a hold on me, tonight

Well maybe all of my friends should confront

The fact that I don't want another girl

All of my friends say I should move on

All of my friends say

All of my friends say

All of my friends say

She's just another girl

Then why can't I sleep at night

And why don't the moon look right

The sounds up, the TV's on

And it's a great big world

She's just another girl,

Don't let her stick it to your heart, boy

She's just another girl

All of my friends say she's just another girl

Another girl

- :)

If only.

- :)

I sometimes wonder why we are here is there a reason at all Everytime I tried/try to think of what the meaning of it all could possibly be a strange image would come to mind and it would always be an old dark brown ship at sea the sails would be blowing in the wind and the rain would be pouring down and it would be dark so and morbid nobody was present on this ship there was no land in sight no light no people and no sound a soundless ship being thrown around at sea I've never known what it meant and have always wondered why or what it could be maybe I should Google it or ask a professional to see what they think maybe it's common maybe it's odd but I know that I do not want to be alive anymore...

- :)

Kill Humans Save The Animals

- :)

Why do we continue to live if we don't have to what insentives are there to living other than an occasional hit of dopamine.

#Sociallyacceptabledrugaddict

#Dopamine

#Letsbothendit

- :)