@fumalsamakah from ————— am i ugly?

They didn't look at Noe, either. The child was an unwelcome reminder of their own live's fragility, and that was before they were strange and wrong and unsettling, too quite by half, no light in their eyes, wandering the streets without a home or a name. It would take years, for them to be made into a real monster — to be made into a tool DESIGNED TO DEVOUR GODS — but the others knew the child was wrong far before their wrongness was true.

At the offered permission, though, Noe shifts closer, scarred hand reaching out once again. Their fingers are gentle when they touch the strands of hair, like this pretty person is very delicate. Like they're something that Noe isn't. ( fellstar / stareater. noe doesn't eat this kind of deity, even if they can feel the oracle cells in their chest and their weapon gnashing their teeth in hunger. ) Soft. Long and pretty. Noe wonders if it would be nice to have long hair.

They don't look away from her hair, lips parted as if a little awed, but they do shake their head no, they don't know how to braid. Maybe Mama would have taught them, had she lived long enough. Their hair was longer, when they were little, but it hadn't taken long, after everyone died, for it to get too ratty for anything other than a razor to their scalp. It's never been allowed to grow longer than this since. Wouldn't be efficient. Can hair this short even be braided? Noe doesn't know.

"Please," they add, to be polite, finally letting go of her hair. Please teach me.

Gina giggles — easy, light, devoid of cruelty but with too much warped affection to be truly comforting — at that, hefting her gun up and over her shoulders; it's larger than she is, and it can EAT MONSTERS, but it won't. Not this monster, at least. "Oh, don't worry. I'm a good dog — I only kill when ordered. And when the target's a real monster — not like us." Her head tilts, lazy smile being replaced with genuine curiosity. If there's one thing she desires more than being the cause of a beautiful death, it's understanding. "You're not a God Eater — I can tell. What's got you full of little beasts? Do yours make you want to swallow everything you see?"

It’s not a threat, Min-chul doesn’t think / not a conventional one, at least / but it’s become easier for him to react first, to show that he doesn’t intend to let his body come to harm, than to wait and see what decision the peanut gallery comes to in his stead. Less complicated that way, he’s learned. Less complicated, too, to not ask why she seems to know he’s keeping something contained. “Wouldn’t know,” he answers honestly. Considering how often he thinks about his demise, actively, and at length, one’d think he would. “No one’s tried it before, with bullets. Um.” He pauses. “...Please don’t do that. I’m not supposed to die.” It’s— clipped. An afterthought. His gaze darts from hers, as it always does when he’s listening to someone else, and settles somewhere off to the side so she's just outside his periphery. It doesn’t really matter if he can see her, anyhow. “Do you have a permit for that?”

thinking abt how gina wants to experience resonance to experience "true empathy" — she loves violence and putting monsters down and would also honestly really enjoy killing people, but she also values other people and wants above all to truly understand them....agh...

even though rue does NOT like livie, and has made that well known, she's incensed at the total disregard for her suffering and her safety from the information team and has made that known, sometimes violently. similarly, on any of their dual missions, despite making it clear that she detests the woman, they still go out of their way to defend her. that's their job as captain.

Their head tilts, doll - like, as if the peg of their neck is loose. Reddish eyes widen. It's not bad, it's just a type of reaction they're unused to. Noe knows they're unsettling, strange; they have good people who love them, would die and kill for them — but it is hard for most who aren't already part of that strange circle to see past the wrongness and reach curiosity. Least of all one who isn't remade to devour gods.

But — finally, there's a fleeting smile. It's nice, to be asked a question that seems less like examining a monster and more like — well, asking a question. "If you touched it, it would eat you because the touching makes it sick. But the eating you makes you into it, and a thing can't make itself sick."

ah.     understanding slots into place like a clean check on a chessboard and min - chul relaxes into the truth he no longer has to skirt around.     he can feel kasha’s voice,   louder than the rest,   always the loudest,   telling him to lie,   there’s no harm in it,   we’re keeping ourselves safer,   avoiding trouble,   like you want us to,   but it’s easier like this    —    when he knows he has no choice but to proceed without maneuvering vague half - truths.     

(something as blatantly on - the - nose as hungry,   like us doesn’t exactly leave much room for deliberation.)

“ gotcha.     alive and hungry.     the dreaded combo.    ”     and if he were the sort of person who cared more and noticed less,   that’d’ve probably served as enough of a cue to take the first exit left... and maybe keep mind of the butterfingers in the future.     instead,   because he isn’t either of those things     (and because he knows kasha will complain about it later),     he settles on a question.     “  could it get sick,   then?     if it ate something bad,   for example.     ”

@fumalsamakah / min - chul & gina!

She adores creatures like this, like him — she can smell the strangeness. He tastes on her mouth the way that the Aragami do, living organisms that aren't living, a facsimile of it, tiny, devouring monsters taking the shape of an animal. She supposes that makes him the animal.

"If I put a bullet through your chest, would the monsters in you turn the flower black?" Somehow, it sounds more like a flirtation than a threat — and it isn't either, really. GINA RARELY THINKS OF SUCH THINGS, too much bloodshed in her skull to make space for romance. But she only hunts monsters, not humans who're close. ( she'd have to blow her own brains out if she did! ) "I'd love to see."

Soma wants to see how your God Arc is tuned.  You feel like you’re seeing a new side to Soma.

it’s a god eat god world

GOD EATER 3 — developed by bandai namco.

noe likes to read! it's not uncommon for a mission to end with them musing about how they can't wait to get back to base and do some reading or finish a novel they're working through. their reading skills at the beginning of the game were far behind others' — their life on the street meant they were only as literate as your average five year old, after all. still, they were happy to have access to books again, and practiced a lot to get better. they approached kota, early on, and asked if he could help them learn to read better, which he was only too happy to help with. eventually alisa caught word of this and joined in on their lessons. even sakaki started lending them simple scientific documents so they could get better at reading that sort of thing.

by the end of resurrection's storyline, they're exceptionally skilled, and have even taken to writing — it began as a journal and sort of morphed into a fictionalized account of their time with the first unit.

the arm bump™

- “i’m sorry that you had to get mixed up in all this.” - “no, you aren’t.” - “huh?” - “what you’re sorry for, lulu, is running off without telling us.” - “that’s right.  no matter what the danger, we face it together.  that’s how it is with friends.”

ren says outright that lindow and noe's minds are merging the longer they spend inside lindow's oracle cells / consciousness / etc. but there's some particular dialogue in the den that i find very interesting:

lindow: go away...now...leave me...alone... ren: [ ... ] but his words...i think the assimilation is progressing. we need to hurry before your minds meld completely

"but his words...the assimilation is progressing" suggests that "go away / leave me alone" are thoughts that noe has, rather than lindow — or at least thoughts that noe shares. i've certainly headcanon'd that noe is increasingly mentally ill during burst's storyline — i mean, that's all but outright stated — and i think the suggestion that underneath their placid expression, underneath the other companions constantly being "you look sick / you seem lonely / are you okay? are you okay?" that noe is doing really, really poorly. is feeling overwhelmed and trapped and afraid. so, even if only at the deepest parts, a part of them is screaming GO AWAY! LEAVE ME ALONE! I'M SCARED AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO! I CAN'T BREATHE! I'M OVERWHELMED!

the meaningful nod™

those who’ve only ever seen ena out of battle are often confused by them in battle, and vice versa.  ena out of battle seems remarkably well - adjusted for someone who grew up in a cell and experiencing horrendous abuse; they’re clearly haunted and a bit unexpressive at a base level, but they smile easily, and when they do emote it’s always sincere.  around hugo, they even seem comfortable and content.

in battle, though, they’re — almost manic, violent, reckless.  they depend on others to act as supports and throw themselves wholly into killing.  they cherish a strong foe because it gives them more space to cut loose.  there’s none of gentle, content ena, its all violence and desperation, desperation, have to get it out now have to get it out havetogetitouthaveto ———

fighting is as close to therapy as ena ever gets.

their existence is a nightmare.  hugo says it will get better, and in their mind they say it fucking better it fucking better IT FUCKING BETTER ITFUCKINGBETTER and outside they just smile.  they are, especially prior to being picked up by hilda’s crawler, living in fucking hell.  the state of the world is a nightmare for anybody, and that’s not even getting into their own specifics.  they are abused, they are caged, they are — everything is bad.  they want to break free, to kill everyone that’s ever hurt them, or hugo, or zeke, or the kids.  if they have any hope at all of remaining steady, or level, or okay, they need to get the violence and the pain out somewhere, somehow.  anything at all, but the hurt has to live someplace other than nestled in their fucking chest.

it worries the others.  ena’s endurance is perpetually wearing thin, and they tend to go down in battle more than the others — even more than glass cannons like phym.  they’re effective, sure, but at great cost to their body.  all that keeps them from going farther is the knowledge that hugo needs them alive.

once we’re out there, you’ll see we’re not your run-of-the mill AGEs.

noe, during the general god eater timeline, is usually fairly upbeat — or, at least, they're level enough that when they're upset it doesn't always show. come the burst timeline, though, and they're breaking fast.

they just lost shio — a child they thought of as a little sister — after also losing their superior and someone they looked up to. ( never mind their backstory, where they lost their parents and the vast majority of their neighbors very young. ) this is where they really start leaning into being a leader, and they get very headstrong to protect others even at the expense of their own health, overworking themself in ways the others notice — the others tell noe that they look sick or lonely a lot! alisa herself says "you seem like you're just rushing to die."

they grab lindow's god arc to protect licca, even knowing that doing so will likely kill them, because they have to do SOMETHING. because they can't lose anyone else, not again! and it does very fucking nearly kill them to do that.

then noe — peaceful, even, strong noe — hears from ren that they might not be able to save lindow, and they SNAP. they slam him into a fucking soda machine for so much as suggesting it. later, when ren asks if they could kill lindow themselves, if they had to, they answer — voice breaking, desperate — "i'll save him, no matter what."

and they do it. but it's still so scary, to be — just to be. to be the leader, to lose anyone else. their major failure as a leader is struggling to depend on others because they're so scared of anyone else being lost to them. soma even calls them on it when they tell him it's okay to depend on others — "you're the only one who takes on more than i do."