some people think writers are so eloquent and good with words, but the reality is that we can sit there with our fingers on the keyboard going, “what’s the word for non-sunlight lighting? Like, fake lighting?” and for ten minutes, all our brain will supply is “unofficial”, and we know that’s not the right word, but it’s the only word we can come up with…until finally it’s like our face got smashed into a brick wall and we remember the word we want is “artificial”.

guess who spent 8 straight fucking hours on this

yeah it was me

i regret hyperfocus

anyway have the gif and plain image

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oof! it’s been a good long while since i posted anything.

anyway this is kind of a vent piece? it’s more to do with the feeling that your art is never good enough and that you’re always just scrapping things because they never seem right, and eventually just getting frustrated and giving up. i’ve been feeling a lot of that recently, but i managed to break through my art block a little while ago!

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posting this here to see if tumblr will stop being a prick for five seconds

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these are andelore and daetatis, who are technically the same character. andelore is the angel of grief, while daetatis is the demon of freedom. i drew these a while back but yknow,,, art,

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a design for a suit of armour that i doodled up a little while ago

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this is the MATRIARK, one of my newer homestuck ocs! i’ll throw some info about her under the cut.

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before you start reading, there is a trigger warning for gratuitous use of chucklevoodoos, cults, cult ideals, deification, direct mind control, dream influencing, brainwashing and general disregard for life.

The Matriark is a purpleblood who essentially made a cult around herself, which came to be known as the Ark of Joy. In this, she promised to her followers (known as Mirthless Lambs, the Lambs of the Ark, or Grubs of the Ark) that she would bring them to a paradise known only as the Ark to escape the insane heretics around them.

This was a ruse seeing as at first she had started the cult because she desired to be worshipped almost as a deity. Her Lambs in the beginning were not particularly voluntary, since the primary ranks usually consisted of unwilling trolls who had been hypnotised via her chucklevoodoos, assuming that they belonged to a caste that she could breach them psychically. At this time, she only used bruteforce chucklevoodoos, to keep them in her control constantly and not release them until they had been thoroughly brainwashed. However, later, her chucklevoodoos also manifested in her target's dreams, which played into her desire to be seen as a deity. She would also steal grubs from the brooding caverns to raise as her Lambs, and slaughter lusii so orphaned trolls would have to either come to her for protection, or be culled.

Later though, she ended up falling for her own con and genuinely believed in the mission that she had been selling to her followers and genuinely started caring for the Lambs under her wing. Around this point she stopped needing to hypnotise trolls to become her lambs since many joined willingly, though a lot of them requested that she use her powers on them in order to cleanse them of certain emotions, memories or just to bring them peace in the moment - almost in a healing manner. Her fierce protectiveness of her Lambs would also mean that any who taunted a Lamb would end up being brutally murdered - either by other Lambs, or by the Matriark herself. Any who opposed the Ark would be slaughtered, and Lambs who attempted to leave would be decimated.

The spreading of knowledge about the Ark of Joy caused a lot of controversy among the Church of the Dark Carnival, especially since it believed in things directly contradictory to what they believed in, and that it was almost a new religion. However, due to the massive growth of the church, and the sheer amount of followers that it had garnered, it was impossible to shut it down due to the fact that it could literally cause a revolution. As much as the Empress despised how much the Matriark considered herself a better leader than herself, she also kind of didn't give a shit seeing as the Matriark wasn't planning to overthrow her. So the higher ups seethed as more of the troll population on Alternia drew towards the Matriark and her cult, incapable of doing anything about it. Fortunately, the Matriark was finally realising a way to get to the Ark.

She claimed to her Lambs that they were so close to the Ark that they could almost feel it. She would preach to them that they would be able to walk fearlessly in the sun, to live without fear of culling due to caste, without the feuding of seadwellers versus landdwellers. The Ark turned out to be a real planet a few galaxies away, and with the assistance of all of the castes within the cult, they managed to commandeer a ship or three and escape Alternia with a Matriorb of their own. This new life on a planet called Arkalant - or the Ark, as most of the Lambs know it as - fulfilled everything that she had promised. The sun wasn't as harsh as the Alternian, and due to her influence, castes were no longer a hierarchy but more of a way to see which jobs you'd be most suited for. Higher castes were considered protectors, and lower castes would work the land.

In a very backwards way, she actually achieved what she set out to do in the beginning: she became revered and adored, and even worshipped after her death despite no longer desiring for that to happen. Even after they migrated to Arkalant, the Matriark continued to be the leading figure of the Ark of Joy, and once there the Lambs would become Mirthful instead of Mirthless. Stragglers of the Cult would remain on Alternia, spreading the word of the Ark of Joy, and one day desiring to reach Arkalant themselves. The presence of the Ark on Alternia would slowly fade, instead kept to internet forums and bold word of mouth. It would quickly become a cullable offense to talk about it or belong to the cult, but that wouldn't stop hopeful lowbloods, scared midbloods and tired highbloods from following the teachings of the Ark. Usually these adolescents would live out their 10 sweeps on Alternian, spending the entire time preparing themselves for and dreaming about a life on Arkalant.

Before the Migration, Lambs would wear thick bands of any metal that they could get their hands on that would cover half of their forearms. The band on their dominant arm would be engraved with their own sign, whilst the other would hold the sign of the Matriark. However, after the Migration, the bands would be downgraded to a simple bracelet of metal that stayed on their dominant wrist. The outside would be engraved with their own sign, whilst the inside would hold an engraving of the Matriark's sign. Sometimes this could be swapped out for a ring or a necklace with the same pattern for discretion.

so there’s the information about the Matriark herself, and the cult called the Ark of Joy! if you want to make an oc who follows the teachings of the Matriark, feel free to do so! make sure to tag me if you end up making a post about it

i drew this a little while ago but i’m still pretty proud of it. it's a reworked design of one of my ocs given the new light on goldblood designs

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these actually were drawn before the last picture i posted but who the fuck gives a shit about chronological order

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god this actually took a lot of time and effort and is probably the most adventurous piece i’ve done thus far. however! i love it and i’m very proud of myself

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made a new icon for my main blog for spooktober

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got inspired and drew. surprisingly, doing the whole process at all, let alone in one sitting, is an achievement

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uhhh vriska in dave’s suit for the @homestuckartists outfit swap event!

some gay mermaid / mersona shit that i did a while back... like 3 months ago lmao

oof i haven’t posted here in like a hot minute but next time i make something that i can be Vaguely proud of maybe i’ll throw it in here

a vent piece

depression can go fuck itself royally

some sprites for the HADS sprite pile! my two favs, both underappreciated