Simon is the type to wake you up on a precious day off together and spend an hour rearranging your guts, your feet around his ears, bed frame banging the wall till the plaster chips, bedding pulled off the mattress and soaked with gods know what, whispering filth and depravity between groans and grunts… then make you the best bacon and eggs you’ve ever had. It’s a shame your hands shake too much to lift your fork though.
I don’t understand why Master Chief isn’t being simped for as much as other characters. He’s literally one of the og masked characters and people seem to love those. He’s also huge and the strong silent type. He’s the whole package. 💚