Pool. Dead.

How I eat popcorn at the movies. 🔊

THE ENTIRE SHARKBOY AND LAVAGIRL SCRIPT WITH EVERY INSTANCE OF “DREAM” REPLACED WITH “MEME” YOU ARE WELCOME

Sharkboy was not always half shark, half boy. He was a marine biologist - or, at least, in training. His father studied great white sharks and called his son “Sharkboy” because of how much he loved to care for the sharks. He made them sushi and had given them all names: Goodmilk, Peggy, Eggbat… and Crackett. But one day an incredible, mysterious storm appeared. It swept away the entire laboratory. Sharkboy! Thanks to their life rafts, Sharkboy and his father survived. But they survived on different sides of the wreckage, each floating off in a different direction. Sharkboy! Sharkboy was completely alone. Almost completely. But one of the sharks recognized him. Hey, it’s Sharkboy. Don’t take a bite outta him, boys - he’s a friend. They took Sharkboy to their cave home , where he’d be safe and dry. His new family were sharks. Hundreds of sharks. The sharks raised him as one of their own, training him in the ways of the shark. You must keep moving to survive. Always go forward, never back. To live by instinct and instinct alone. Eventually he grew gills, and sharp talons for claws. His teeth sharpened themselves to a point. He grew fins - all sorts of fins. But that was years ago. I first met Sharkboy while fishing on the dock this summer. He seemed lost. - You have to get a job! - No, I have a job! So I snuck him home… Then maybe you should just leave. when my parents were too busy to notice. I kept him fed and in water. He had been traveling the universe in search of his father. He told me of his latest adventures on a planet so cool it makes you drool. He said I too could go to Planet Drool someday. Then one night I was visited by a glowing light. An amazing girl with purple flames for hair and skin of molten lava rock appeared. I called her… Lavagirl. She smiled at me, for that seemed to be her name. She told me she needed Sharkboy to return to Planet Drool with her, for a great crisis was developing. She asked if I could go with them. I told her, “I have school tomorrow. ” She gave me a sad look and flamed away, taking Sharkboy with her. I haven’t seen Sharkboy or Lavagirl since then. And that’s what I did this summer. Enough! Someone is picking that up. And it’s not gonna be me! We were supposed to tell true stories. That is a true story. - Does Lavagirl have special powers? - There’s no such thing as Lavagirl. She can… She can shoot lava out of her hands. Cool. How many people think Max’s story is true? - Not true. - Made up. - Not true. - It’s just a made-up story. If it’s true, why don’t you bring Sharkboy and Lavagirl to class tomorrow? They went away. I don’t know where they went. Have a seat, Max. Linus, you’re next. This summer, I met a new friend… who was half dork, half boy. I called him Dorkboy. But his real name was Max. We had him for dinner, but he stunk so bad that we all blew chunks. That’s enough, Linus. Linus, Max, stay. Come on, Mr. E! Class, what’s my name? Mr. Electricidad. Mr. Electricidad, exactly. Not Mr. Electric, not Mr. Electrici-tha-tha-tha-tha. Linus, you just earned a minus for your behavior today. This is a new year. Do you think you can be friends? No. Then it’s been decided: You’ll be the best of friends. Which means no more picking on Max, Linus. Max. You’re in the fourth grade. There are some good kids in this class. Find them. Make friends with them. Memeing keeps you from seeing what’s right here in front of you. This isn’t a meme. This is the real world. Lost my train of thought. No memeing. Got it. I’ll try harder. What do you have there? It’s my meme journal. It has all of my most precious memes in it. I’ll never part with it for as long as I live. You’re a good kid, Max. Max! Let’s be imaginary friends. You can try and hang with us… and we’ll pretend you don’t exist! Check it out. Sharkboy gets shocked by electric eels, and then they feed on his cooked flesh. Wow, Linus. Your skills are… weak. Ohh… I’m gonna burst your bubble, Meme Boy. You’re dead! Get the book! Give me the book. Hand over the book, or you’ll visit the meme world! Ooh… Agh-haa… All right! Got it! I’ll bring you a revised edition tomorrow. - Max, wake up! - Meme, Max. - Open your eyes, Max. - Eyes open, and meme. Stay memeing. Wake up! Sharkboy! And Lavagirl! Hyah! Max! My cookies! My giant cookies! What are you doing baking sweets? You know what happens when he eats sugar. I baked them for his class. So you could make friends at school, and now you’ve eaten all of them. No, it was Sharkboy and Lavagirl! Look - this one has shark bites, and this one is singed. There’s no such thing as Sharkboy and Lavagirl. Well, I believe him. Your mother’s right. When you go to sleep and close your eyes, they may come back. But when you open ‘em again, Sharkgirl and Lavaboy’ll be… outta here. - But… - Shh. Mouth closed, eyes closed. - Now? - Yes, now. You can wait till you’re in bed to close your eyes, Max. Kids need their memes. Kids… need to grow up! He’s not making any friends with these cookies! There’s no such thing as Sharkboy and Lavagirl. There’s no such thing as Sharkboy and Lavagirl. Yes, there is. Stupid plugs! Please don’t let me have to go to school. They’ll make fun of me, I know it! I wish I could just escape this loser world and go to Planet Drool. Games and toys and laughs and fun… May there be terrible storms, rain, sleet, snow, tornadoes… so I can lay here all day tomorrow and meme of Drool. Guess I didn’t meme hard enough. There are plenty of good opportunities. You just need to look. Ooh, traffic engineer! Hey. I was cleaning out my closet and look what I found. Remember Tobor? The robot you tried to build? Why were you cleaning out your closet? I had to find one of these. - Is Mom making you get a real job again? - Writing is a real job. - When it pays. - Max, I’m walking you to school today. So what do you say? Wanna finish making Tobor? It won’t work. - Well, how do you know? - 'Cause you told me it wouldn’t. I did? I’m sorry. I should’ve never said that. It’s OK. You were right. Dumb idea. How did these happen? The grass was dead anyway. Why are you so morbid? I just wish anything could happen so I wouldn’t have to go to school today. That’s not realistic, Max. It’s bad enough your father’s head is in the clouds, but not you too, OK? Just push that meme aside and move on. Like with your meme? The one about you and Dad and me? Well, I do have a meme about us, but, as I’m sure you’ve been noticing lately, your father and I are just… Well, we’re… not compatible. Sorry. I don’t mean to dump all this on you right before you have to go to school, but… school’s waiting. Did we have to move so close to school? Your father thought we’d save money on gas. Come right home after school today, 'cause there’s some things we need to talk about. I love you. I wish anything could happen so I wouldn’t have to come home today. Hey, look, it’s Meme Boy! Who knows where tornadoes come from? Well, when cold air mixes with hot air, it can form a tornado, as the hot and cold chase each other around and around and around. I memet of a story kind of like Sharkboy and Lavagirl - Ice Girl and Meme Boy. Her powers come from her crystal heart. No more fairy tales. Piranha Girl and Beluga Boy. Plastic Boy and Metal Girl. Barf Boy and Vomit Girl. Does everyone hear me? I’m a teacher, right? Wrong. I’m an awakener. Only I’m finding it more and more difficult to keep my class… awake. No recess again for you, Marissa - too many allergies. There are more boogers on your work than there is work. I’m just cold. I’ll be happy to change places with you. It’s a lot warmer back there in my spot. But I… have to sit up front. It’s just that you’re sitting right under the vent. - It’s August and you’re sneezing. - You’re gonna get me in trouble. Max. Are you… trying to make real friends? Trying, like you told me to. That’s good. Just not with my daughter, OK? No! It wasn’t like that. It’s just… Sit down, Max. - Give me back my journal! - Class has begun. Everyone in your seats. - Linus took my journal! - I did not! Minus! I mean, Linus. You get a minus for misconduct. Give Max back his journal. One more time, Linus, and we’ll have to change your name to Minus. He ruined my meme journal! I did not! Mr. Electric, send him to the principal’s office and have him expelled! You’re in my class, not the other way around! I know everything and you know nothing! At the end of class, both of you report to the principal’s office! With your parents! Everybody down! It’s them! I’m looking for Max. She’s hot! Whoa! We need your help, Max. Come with us. What do I have to do? Go with us to Planet Drool. We’ll explain on the way. We’re going to Planet Drool? It’s my home planet. Just outside our solar system. You should know, Max - you made it up. - I can’t go with you. - Why not? Because you’re not real. Both of you are just a meme. And when I open my eyes, you’ll be gone. We’re still here, Max. If you wanna stop the darkness from destroying our worlds, come with us. You better go with them. OK… I’ll go. Everyone follow me and we’ll find shelter. I can’t believe I’m finally getting to ditch this place and go to Planet Drool! How are we getting there? Put these on, everybody. Blue goggles for the boys, pink for the girls. Do you have another pair of boy goggles? Uh-uh. So, how do you fly it? - You don’t know? - Duh! That’s sort of been the whole problem! You press go. - Now, how do you fly it? - It’s got an autopilot. You just thought of everything, didn’t you, Max? Not exactly. - How do we land it? - That’s the part I never thought of! Jupiter… Saturn… Neptune… You might wanna hold on to something. Recognize your meme world, Max? Not really. I feel like I should, but I just don’t. It’s affecting him too. I thought he would just remember. - Remember what? - Your memes. This planet? Us. Your powers. - I have powers? - More than any of us. Don’t you know that? Everything that is or was, began with a meme. And you memet us, Max. Us and this whole place. I did? Every meme you ever had landed right here on Planet Drool. Why is it so dark? The planet is dying. It began yesterday. What’s the calculation, Sharkboy? 45 minutes till the darkness destroys Planet Drool. We didn’t go to Earth to save you, Max. We need you to save Planet Drool. But how? The Meme Lair is on the other side of the planet. That’s where your memes are going bad. We have to go there and reverse it. We have to travel through the Passage of Time, catch the Train of Thought, swim down the Stream of Consciousness and skate across the Sea of Confusion - now covered in ice. Why’d you do that, Max? Why’d you freeze the ocean? I… Ouch! Max didn’t mean to do it. Did you, Max? Max is a good boy, otherwise you and I would be evil, and we’re not evil. I’m not evil, am I, Max? I don’t think so. That’s why we brought you here - to put things back in order. We just have to stay positive. It’s not the end of the world. Not yet, it’s not. The darkness! Run! This is like a bad meme! Oh, yeah? Just wait till you meet Mr. Electric! He’s the worst bad meme yet! Where is everyone? - Mostly trapped on Mount Neverrest. - By Mr. Electric. But Planet Drool’s a place for kids to meme and have endless fun! It’s endless fun, all right. Once you get on… you can’t get off. Kids aren’t allowed to rest, 'cause if they rest, they sleep, and if they sleep, they meme. - And if they meme… - It takes power away from Mr. Electric. But we’re gonna stop him with our secret weapon. Shouldn’t we save those kids first? Why can’t I do that? Lavagirl! Hooray! Who knows where Mr. Electric is hiding? Everyone? They’re not raising their hands. You’re all upside down. Ah. Who is stopping my unstoppable coasters? - Back in your seats! - Go! Run! Hide! - Let’s get outta here! - Everyone back in your seats! Who’s Mr. Electric? He’s supposed to provide light to the planet, but all he brings now is darkness. Fun has begun! He’s taking us up! My home! At half its normal power. He’s taking us down. Show time! Keep playing! Never stop! Games and toys and laughs… hey-hey-hey… and fun! Well, well, well. If it isn’t Sharkboy and Lavagirl. What are you doing halting my endless-fun coaster and infiltrating my lair? We don’t need permission from you. Fiery! I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Mr. Electric! Why are you bringing misery to our planet? You’re supposed to be running it. You’re supposed to be running it. I am running it - right into the ground. - Those are my orders. - Who ordered that? No school, no discipline, no rules. And, most important, no memes. Memes can destroy you, can’t they? - My instincts tell me that is so. - Really? - That’s why we have to stop you. - You and what army? - Now? - Now. Ha-ha-ha-haa! Pee-pee-pee-pee… Feel the burn! Agh… Not for real. Aaah! Ha-ha! Internal radar, shark-like reflexes… You’re amazing! But is it enough to defeat Mr. Electric? We have our secret weapon, remember? Did you really believe you could stop me? Oh… Ah… I know we can’t. But he can. Take it away, Max. - Show him what you’re made of, Max. - What am I supposed to do? - I told you this would happen. - I thought he would just remember. Remember what?! The meme. Remember the meme. I don’t remember half my memes. That’s why I write them in my meme journal. What half of your memes do you remember? This one I remember. Where are you taking us? Where all useless memes go - to the Meme Graveyard! Whoa! Ploop! Cuckoo! Well, at least we’re on the Passage of Time. Maybe it’ll take us to the Meme Lair. It’s going in the wrong direction. The Meme Lair’s that way. What’s in the Meme Lair? It’s where all the memes that fuel Planet Drool are stored. But they’re being destroyed. - How? - That’s what we have to find out. Soon even Sharkboy and I will cease to exist. Duck! Max, where is your meme journal? Great thinking, Sharkie! We can read his memes out loud and turn everything back to the way it was. I may even realize my true identity. I threw it away. My journal’s back on Earth. We really thought you were the answer, Max. Don’t listen to him. He’s just upset because you didn’t show up and make him king of the ocean, with a giant fish army to back him up. Look who’s talking! You thought you’d find a great use for your powers and heal the planet. Max thought his meme world would be a happy place. We’ve all been duped. Ohh! I think you broke my fin. Sorry. Hey, you! I see you hiding! Come back here! I was awakened! I’m sorry. Did all the children from Mount Neverrest escape? It was Sharkboy and Lavagirl. But I took care of it - see? Someone was with them? Just another child afraid of his own shadow. No threat to us. I banished him to the Meme Graveyard. Where old memes lie? He could find an ally! I told you, every meme must be smashed, every child captured! You want him back, we’ll simply track him when he falls asleep. Fool! He’s the Daymemeer. And the moment he realizes it will be the moment of our doom! Now what do you want me to do? Bring me the boy before he discovers his true powers and tears my new kingdom apart! Plugs, redirect the darkness. And… bring me the Plughounds! We’ll never find our way out of this graveyard. Darkness! Headed this way! Sit down, Max. - What for? - Close your eyes and meme. If Max can’t remember his memes, maybe he can rememe them. He could meme us out of here. Meme, Max. Now, what do you see? I see a… giant… chocolate-chunk marshmallow cookie… with lots of warm milk. - Sorry. I’m starving. - Here’s some food. - You’re not gonna like that. - I’m so hungry I could eat lava rocks. What is that?! Lava rocks. Here, have some real food. Fresh sushi. - It’ll knock you right out. - That’s not fresh. I’m not even sure that’s sushi anymore. - It’s just a few weeks old. - I’ll cook it for you. Oops. It’s OK. I’m not that hungry anymore. Let me just rest a moment. Maybe I can sleep. It’s getting closer. Get outta here! Max, I know you’ve got a lot to figure out, but if you happen to meme about who I am and how I fit into this world, it would really be helpful for me… No distractions. You steer him off course, we could be lost in a sea of memes. - I’m sorry. I’m desperate. - Focus on the problem at hand. Max needs to meme us out of here, so how about I put him to sleep? - No, Sharkboy. - Just one punch. He’ll be out like a light. I’ve seen this before. It’s on the tip of my… finger. It’s a hand! It is a hand. A hand? Another hand. Yep? - It’s Tobor! - Who? Tobor! I memet him up when I was a kid… a robot that could help me with my homework. I tried to build him once. Everyone kept telling me he would never work. So here he is - a forgotten meme in the Meme Graveyard. Maybe he can help us. He’s supposed to be very smart. Tobor, awake! Yes? He works! - We can ask him anything now. - Let me, let me! Tell me something about me. I’m clueless. Actually, you are extremely bright. Am I king of the ocean, or what? No. Sorry. How do I save Planet Drool? The answer is in your memes. You mean if I put him to sleep, he’ll meme us out of this mess? No. At least, not here. Darkness is falling. Any meme of his would become a nightmare… and you don’t want those becoming a reality. But if you go to the Land of Milk and Cookies… Of course! that’s where the good memes are. Where the answers are. It’s perfect, Max. The Land of Milk and Cookies is a safe, sweet place. You’ll be able to meme easily there. Can you take us? I have no body. I can’t move. You can move your eyes and your mouth. Why didn’t you work back on Earth, Tobor? Some memes are so powerful they become real - like Sharkboy and Lavagirl. I, on the other hand, am still only a meme. Oh… - What’s wrong? - Train of Thought… I’m losing it. You were taking us to the Land of Milk and Cookies, remember? I mean I’m literally losing the Train of Thought. It’s down there. That’s the Train of Thought? How do I keep it on track? With your mind. The Train of Thought gets easily distracted. Stay focused, and it’ll speed you directly to the Land of Milk and Cookies. The rest is up to you. Sorry I forgot about you, Tobor. Are you kidding? You just saved me. I’m free! Max, get down here! - What’s wrong? - We can’t control it. All you have to do is keep it on track. How can you keep it on track if there is no track? Looks like another meme gone bad! What do we do? Yell? Scream? Jump. It’ll be all right. What does it mean when your Train of Thought… wrecks? Well… It can’t be good, buddy. How much time do we have, Sharkboy? 20 minutes. Eww! Stick to rotten fish, please! Chocolate! I stepped in chocolate! We’re here. The Land of Milk and Cookies! Oh, yeah! The milk is warm. He’ll be out in no time. Lay down. Here’s a marshmallow pillow. How about memeing us into the Meme Lair? The ground is thumping too much. My highly trained ears hear it too. Boom, boom, boom. - Let me hear it. - I wouldn’t. Hothead. When you memet up these giant cookies, who did you expect to be able to eat them? I really didn’t think about it. 'Cause if you meme giant cookies, something has to be created to consume giant cookies. Cookie giants! Ohh… Frosting. Those giants almost look like my parents. They seem happy together. Is that your meme? We had a meme we’re family. It hasn’t been coming true lately. Most memes don’t come true on their own. You have to make them true. It takes a lot of work. Not easy. But not impossible either. Stinking fresh air! Blinding sunlight! Oh, how I long for a sky of fluorescent lights! Ahh… Better stand back. All right, that was me. - Still empty-handed, I see. - If you’re so powerful, you find him. That’s your job! Do it, or I’ll have you discharged! Shh… Someone is memeing in here. All right, Max, you’ve had your cookies and milk. Now go to sleep. I’ll try. Go to sleep! Not like that. Sing him a lullaby. Your turn. It’s working! Keep it up, Sharkboy. Meme about me next, Max. I need to know who I am. Not just destruction or a simple flame. Meme of me as something good. He’s having a nightmare! Wake up, Max! Wake up! Stop that racket, Sharkboy - you’re giving him nightmares! Sorry, Max. Argh! Ow! Ohh… What was that for? Your nightmare was about me, wasn’t it? I don’t remember. But I did meme about one thing… Plughounds! This may come as a shock to you. Feel the power! It’s empty! Fudge. I forgot to meme of gas. Max! My powers are weakening. Watch the power lines - very dangerous. Yaaarrhh! Yaaarrhh! Sharkboy, get me down from here! Can’t you see I’m busy? Hot lava… Hot lava… I don’t got much fight left in me, Max. Where’s Lavagirl? It’s up to you now, Max. Meme us out of here. We believe in you, Max. Shark boat with turbo boosters! Shark boat with turbo boosters! A banana split?! Still hungry, Max? How about a knuckle sandwich? No, look! It’s a banana-split boat! Then let’s split! Ow! Huh? Catch you later. All memeers must meme. This is great, Max. You’re starting to daymeme. Keep that up, and they’ll never get us. Why not? Learn to meme with your eyes open, and you won’t have to be asleep to meme. You’ll be able to make anything happen at any time. Sugar will give you nightmares. - How much time do we have? - Don’t ask. The Meme Lair’s across the Ocean of Ice. We’ll have to travel there by foot. What was it you saw in your meme, Max? I saw an object shaped like… Give me something to draw with. The Crystal Heart! That’s the treasure of the Land of Ice! In the Ice Castle. It can freeze anything - even time. I’ve always memet of freezing a moment in time. And the Ice Castle’s ruled by the Ice Princess. I hear she’s the most beautiful girl on the planet. Ouch! She is not! She’s cold and cruel and cares for nobody but herself. She’s just saying that, Max. - Have you met her? - No. But I know we don’t get along. - How do you know that? - I’m fire. She’s ice. We must be enemies. We need that Crystal Heart. But I need you both to get it. I just hope this isn’t a trap. Whoa! If we freeze time with the Crystal Heart, we’ll be able to make it to the Meme Lair and save the planet. That’s the plan. Behold the Ice Castle! Home to the Princess of the Land of Ice. - The Crystal Heart’s inside the castle? - So they say. Let’s go. It’s no use! I’ll melt the bridge. This place inflames me. Can you cool down enough to get across? I’d have to be asleep to do that. Can you try sleepwalking? My meme is to live on Earth - but someplace warm… and that Earth will accept me, even… if I… destroy… everything I… touch! No, Lavagirl! Don’t sneeze! Aaa-tchoo! Aarghh… Look. She’s sleeping. - They’ve found us again! Lavagirl! - Shh! If you wake her up, she’ll reheat. She can make it. Lavagirl, they’re behind you! - Let’s go. Hurry! - Argh! It’s a trap! You can almost feel the electricity in the air, can’t you? This is all wrong. Someone else’s memes are in here. Lights out! Welcome to the Meme Lair! I am the ruler of Planet Drool. No, you’re not! Max is! Max may have memeed it originally… but I am much… cooler. I… am Minus. How’d you get so powerful? I do a lot of reading. My book of memes! That’s why everything’s so messed up - he’s changing it! Electric eels. Shocking, isn’t it, Sharkboy? Reminds me of the time that electrical storm blew apart your father’s laboratory. - Where is my father? - Hm. Let’s see. Check the bottom of the ocean. And Lavagirl… Once I figure out how to freeze this planet’s core, all of your powers will disappear. Powers? What powers? And last but least, Max. You thought you could escape fear by running away to memeland. But fear exists in the one place you can never escape! Your mind! I will show you the true meaning of fear. When darkness falls, the rest of your memes will be destroyed and I will rule Planet Drool. Blah-blah-blah, threat-threat-threat… You must all leave now. I have some memeing to do. Whoa! If I could just get my meme journal, I could turn everything back to the way it was. My fire’s dimming. I can’t melt the bars. My strength is failing me as well. How much time do we have, Sharkboy? Who cares? We’re never getting out of here. La La’s. They like you. - I don’t feel distracted right now. - I do! This song is driving me crazy! Don’t worry about him. He’s a cold fish. I’m serious! They’re singing at a frequency… my highly trained ears find… disturbing! Sing louder. Sing higher. You don’t wanna be too close to him when he explodes. Aaargghh! Shark frenzy! Nice job channeling your anger, Sharkie. Huh. First things first. Transportation out of here. My memes. Lavagirl, you have a lava bike! I do? I do! This is so exciting! Cool it, Lavagirl. Everything we need is right here in this book. Sharkboy… your father really is at the bottom of the ocean. He’s in a submarine. Looking for you! He’s over the hydrothermal vents, Mid-Atlantic Ridge, 42 degrees west by 14 north. Depth: 1800 meters. Near a snake pit! I need to get back to Earth. - What’s it say about me? - I’m not sure what this is. I can figure it out. Maybe there’s a section on my true identity. Lavagirl, no! Oh, no. What have I done? That’s terrific, LG! It’s OK, Lavagirl. It was an accident. Why did you make me out of lava?! Why, Max? Just let her cool down. She’s just blowing off steam. I know I can be good. I can feel it. But everything I touch, I destroy. Why did you make me like that? I have more potential. I’m sure you do. And why’d you make us a team? We’re nothing alike. When I’m near water, I fizzle out. When he’s near heat, he shrivels. We’re not compatible. Your… hair’s on fire. Yeah, it does that. Thanks, Sharkie. Maybe I really am evil. So far everything else you’ve memeed has been correct. Maybe I just need to learn to accept it. That’s it! Everything I’ve memet so far has been correct. The Crystal Heart! Yeah, we were captured, but that’s 'cause Minus doesn’t want me to get it. We have to get back to the Ice Castle. 10 minutes left. We’ll never make it! - We can do it! - How? You’re Sharkboy and Lavagirl. You can do anything. Wake up! What? He escaped. And he’s getting the Crystal Heart. Shut it down. Shut it all down now! I did. It’s on a grid system. It takes time for the darkness to travel. - How soon? - Not soon enough. - Then destroy him. - How? By smashing his most precious meme: Sharkboy and Lavagirl. Is that what you saw, Max? Yes. You’ll have to climb the ice pillar and get it. It’s as delicate as a snowflake, so don’t drop it. And don’t touch it with your hands either - you’ll freeze. Use your claws. Aaarrhh… Lava, can you…? Never mind. Chew on some ice. It’ll keep you cool. Hm. Great job, Max. I got it! She’s frozen solid! Kneel before the Ice Princess. You tried to steal the Crystal Heart. Why? We believe it can freeze time. Long enough for us to defeat Minus. My Crystal Heart cannot help you. Only I have the power to use it. - Then come with us. - She can never leave this castle. The crystal is the only thing that protects our kingdom. Please, Princess. We’re running out of time. Perhaps I could give it to you. - Not without my blessing. - Father, you’re smothering me again. But are you worthy to wield it? Yes. The crystal you stole was a decoy. The true Crystal Heart is somewhere in this room. Choose the correct one, and you may carry it before you. Pick that one. It’s around your neck. - How’d you know? - I saw it in my meme. Usually, if you snooze, you lose. With Max, you snooze, you win. But be warned, Max, if anything happens to my Crystal Heart, my entire kingdom will be destroyed. Do you, Max, take this Crystal Heart to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, till death do you part? I do. - Do you trust him with your heart? - I do. Do you mean what you say? Yes. I mean, I do. The crystal will now work - but my daughter must stay here. Off with you, then! Good luck. We’re almost at the Meme Lair! If we’re gonna do this, we gotta do it now! - How much time? - We’re out of time! 10 seconds! What? I can’t hear you. - Five seconds. - Here it goes. Three, two, one… We’re out of time. - What happened? - It didn’t work. How could it not work? I was trying to tell you! Whoa… Only the Ice Princess can use it. It’s not her fault her father won’t let her leave her castle. Boo-hoo. No underwater readings. No anything! I’ll rip your sockets to shreds! Calm down, Sharkboy. Mr. Electric’s baiting you. I can’t… fight… my instincts! No, Sharkboy! Hey! Watts… up? You know - watts. As in a measure of electrical power. The 60-watt bulb? Watts up? What? Electric eels. That’s what’s up. Swim away, Sharkboy! Swim away! Can he survive down there? He can hold his breath, but not forever. - He’ll drown if I don’t go get him. - I can’t let you go. You’ll die too. He’s my best friend. Come on, Sharkboy. Come on, Sharkboy! Sharkboy! Wake up, Sharkboy! Lavagirl! Lavagirl! Lavagirl, please! Lavagirl… What am I gonna do now? What do you think you should do? Meme a better meme. Interesting. Explain. I wanted all my memes to come true, but I only memet for myself. I wanted to escape my real world, when the world needed my help to make it a better place. Selfish memes shouldn’t come true. You’re becoming a very good memeer, Max. A very good memeer indeed. What do you do when your memes have been destroyed? Meme a better meme. An unselfish meme. She knew this would happen if she saved you. But I couldn’t stop her. Look! Lava. We have to get her to that volcano. I’ll go. I’m stronger and faster. You’ll burn up. - Sure this will save her? - It’ll do more than save her. I know who you are, Lavagirl. You are not fire, or a simple flame. You are greater than that. Something more important, and so necessary. It is why you must live. You are not destruction. You are not evil. Stand back. You are… light. Who turned on the lights?! Oh! Power, everywhere! Whoa! How’d you get here so fast? Hold off Mr. Electric while I deal with Minus. I’ll need my fish army. I’ll unfreeze the ocean. Good luck. I’ve become what you feared most… Minus. How did you get in here? I’m the Daymemeer, able to meme with my eyes open. Hate to burst your bubble, Meme Boy, but I read your book. There’s not one meme you’ve got that I haven’t already seen. So what do you say? Let’s blow the roof off this place. May the best meme win! Wait! Brainstorm! Eugh! Brain… freeze! Brain… fart! Oh… Get ready for the ultimate power outage. And who are you to believe that you can defeat me now? No one special. Just… king of the ocean. Ooh… Shark frenzy. Aaarhh… Aaarhh… Aaarhh… A- ha! You’re afraid of me, aren’t you? I used to be. Someone smashed your memes once… now all you can do is smash everyone else’s. We can create a better meme than this. A better world. Don’t you see? What do you say… Linus? Hurry! No! Don’t let me fall! Wouldn’t meme of it. Don’t smash people’s memes, Linus, because you’ll smash your own as well. And you too will stop believing. Max! I am light. Thank you. You were always that. It had nothing to do with me. But now I know. So thank you. OK, so she’s a light. Big deal. The real news is… what I am. Annoying? King of the ocean. Thanks for saving me. Ouch. Everything will return to being the way it was. You will be able to travel to Earth and back again as you wish. You can search for your father. You can rule Earth’s lava world. And what am I to do, now that you’re all buddy-buddy? Mr. Electric can go back to being the good electrician of the planet. Oh, really? Plugging in power cords? Keeping this loud, obnoxious world a happy place? You’re memeing! I memet you up, and I can unmeme you. You think you can just snap your eyes open and make me vanish? Not so easy. I am the danger of memeing. For every person who memes up the electric light bulb, there’s the one who memes up the atom bomb. This is one meme you won’t be waking up from. I’m gonna put an end to this ridiculous tangent at its source! Where did he go? He’s headed to Earth. He’s going to try and destroy you in your sleep. In my sleep? You mean I’m asleep? All this time I’ve been asleep? No. You’re memeing, Max. With your eyes open. Make the meme real. You can live out your memes on Earth. Just like you made us real. Make it real. Blink your eyes three times. One… Wait. What happens when…? Two… Will I ever see you again? Three. Everyone follow me, I said! We’ve got to find shelter! Max, get up! There’s a tornado heading our way! It’s not a tornado. It’s much worse than that. Linus, wake up! Look! Charge! It’s Mr. Electric from Planet Drool! The one from my memes! You mean… this is real? Your meme is real? Some memes are so powerful they become real. I don’t believe it. - It’s right there in front of you! - I can see that! What I can’t believe is you memet me as a big round bad guy! I’m not bad! Sorry. Kinda took on a life of its own. - Max is in Building C. - No, he’s not. He’s in Building W. That was the other school! Aaarhh! Help! Find Max! Tell him I love him! - Don’t leave me! - I thought you wanted me to leave. No, I don’t. You’re my best friend. I love you. I love you too. Aaargh! Come back! Please, come back. I’m not going anywhere. Neither am I. Aah… Aargh! Uh-oh. Aaargghh! OK, class. I’m just a teacher, and I’m here to inspire the answers from you. And I think that’s some pretty good inspiration outside. So this is now a pop quiz. We need to defeat that guy. Any ideas? Wow, Linus. You get a plus for being the first hand in the air. I can take him. Linus, watch out! - Poop. - Aaargh! Ohh… Nice try. Sorry, Max. Your journal. It’s OK. It was an accident. Plenty more memes where those came from. OK, kids, who’s next? Remember, there are no dumb ideas. - Maybe we can freeze his circuits. - That’s the dumbest idea I ever heard. We’re in the middle of Texas in August! Next idea? Anyone but Linus. Wait - that’s a great idea! Thanks, Linus. Come here, Marissa. Is this yours? How’d you find it? So you’ve seen this? Yes, but… only in a meme. - It can freeze anything. - Even time. What are you doing? You’re not sending my daughter out there. Let her out. Electrical storm headed your way! - Do you know what to do? - I believe so. Stand back. Oh, who do we have here? Get ready for the mega-hurts! Get it? Hertz? As in the unit of electrical frequency? You’re just not paying attention in class, are you? Ooh! Whoa! Awesome! He’s unplugged. Yeah! - You made me a great teacher today. - How did I do that? A great teacher learns as much from his students as they do from him. You have… awakened me. Thank you, Max. Max. Your report, please. The following story is true. It might have started as a meme, but, as we saw yesterday, when we make our memes a reality… reality becomes a meme. Sharkboy lives his meme as king of the ocean, where he cares for all its creatures. He searches for his father’s submarine where there is no light… except in one place, where light shines almost as bright as the sun. It’s where Lavagirl lives her meme, as queen of Earth’s volcanoes that boil at the bottom of the sea, a force of life for all living things. Sharkboy and Lavagirl don’t visit me anymore. But I can visit them - in my memes. So meme a better meme… then work to make it real. Yes?

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