The sound of waves is the only thing keeping the silence from clamping its sharp jaws upon them, chewing them to bits. The water sloshing softly against the cave's small underwater opening continues its perpetual motion blissfully oblivious to the thoughts that weigh heavy on eleven minds.
The words of their previous conversation dangle in the air like knives held by rotting ropes.
Maybe, if none of them speak, everything will dissipate.
Maybe everything will go and just undo itself.
Maybe everything will be normal again.
Quiet.
"I can't," Hewkii croaks.
Takanuva's fingers keep ghosting over his pained wrists, expression vacant, breathing imperceptibly, almost shell-shocked; his ankles are similarly wounded. Jaller and Nuparu flank him, working to at least somewhat fix the dents in the once constricted joints to give their friend a little physical relief, but they're distracted.
"I can't," Hewkii repeats, and his face disappears in his hands. "I can't fight him."
"None of us want to," Onua's voice rumbles kindly.
Lewa is trying to wrap around all five of his remaining siblings simultaneously after having pulled Kongu in close in an attempt to stop himself from shaking too hard. The former captain of the Gukko Force has not complained about it.
"I can't," Hewkii insists: "I can't, I can't..."
"None of us want to," Gali assures him softly.
"He's my brother," the Toa of Stone sobs. One of Hahli's fins carefully lays on his back. "He leaped in to save Hafu from the Tahnok, and he helped us escape when we were sieged, and he promised he would make me feel better when I was sick from the Comets and defeated the Nui-Jaga with Takanuva, and he - he - I can't, I can't..."
"None of us want to." Tahu says.
"You don't understand," red eyes rise to meet theirs, shining with an almost liquid sheen: "I am his little brother. He looked me in the eyes and promised he would protect me with his life. I can't fight him. Even if I tried, even if I wanted to more than anything, even if I could manage to disown him, I could never fight him. I wouldn't manage to lay a finger on him. He's... He's still Pohatu. He's still Pohatu, so I can't. I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't..."
His voice quiets, quiets, quiets, until his heartbroken rambles are drowned by the calm waves as he trembles balled up on himself.
Takanuva continues to stare vacantly at the ground.
They both look so vulnerable, like this.
So lost.
"It's not him," Jaller says. His tone lacks confidence. He turns to Tahu: "It's not really him, isn't it? It's a mimic of sorts."
Tahu does not answer.
Gali picks up the words his closed up throat can't let out with a slow, mournful shake of her head: "Mimics cannot copy memories."
"Then he's mindcontrolled," Kongu's voice is muffled by the armor of his Air brother. His position isn't the most comfortable, but he does not move to face the other Toa. "Like us under the krana, or when Takadox eyestares and braincleanses catchpreys or foolallies. Makuta is evercrafty - I'd be nonesurprised if he could do that."
Lewa's hold on him tightens only a little. Talking eludes him, but his message is clear: He wasn't. He couldn't be. I know how it feels, how it looks in someone's mind, how it reflects in their bodies; I did not see that in him.
"He still has plenty of kraata," Hahli intervenes mildly, without conviction, "He could have..."
"His mask was unmarred," Onua cuts her off - although her voice was already trailing into silence again, already fully doubting her own hopeful hypothesis.
"Antidermis, then," Nuparu offers. He is still working on Takanuva's ankle, or at least trying to. Effectively, all he's done for the past few minutes is stare at it, at the deep bruises the stone constrictions have left to make sure he could not escape even if he'd come to before the tide did (which is what happened, as Hewkii recalled hearing the now eerily silent Toa of Light's screams for help before he even found the cave's entrance). "We saw with the Zamor spheres. He's gaseous. He could have slipped in at some point. Maybe after the first time you fought. Worked his way into his head slowly."
Silence.
"We did leave him." Tahu murmurs. His soft voice sounds so awfully loud in the quiet when he corrects himself: "I did leave him, when I thought we would have had no time to go after him."
Hewkii's sobs continue to melt in the waves.
Takanuva remains perfectly immoble.
It would make it so much easier if it wasn't Pohatu.
It would explain everything so well, so painlessly. It would make all of it a lie, a ploy, yet another unnecessarily cruel scheme Teridax has orchestrated in the nick of time, another plot to beat them down: replacing their brother, so comfortably warm, with a cold imperfect hateful replica.
It would let them hold out hope that the real Pohatu is out there, maybe dead, hopefully alive, and that he is struggling but resisting just like they are; and with that conviction they would be able to leave this hiding place and fight off his doppelganger.
It would make every single word he said a dastardly attempt at destroying their spirit. Falsehoods constructed to hurt with a semblance of truth that cannot be real.
It would make his anger less genuine, his devotion less agonizing, his bitterness less cancerous.
But it is Pohatu.
It always was.
They know it.
They know it.
They know it.
None of them want to fight him.
None of them want to hurt him.
Kopaka stands with great difficulty, rising slowly to his feet.
"I'll bring him back."
"Don't start this," Gali snaps angrier than she wants to be, pleading eyes churning like whirlpools dragging ships to the bottom of the sea: "Please, Mata Nui protect us, do not start this."
"I will."
"Don't," Lewa calls for him with a thin voice, the first thing he's managed to say in hours: "Don't go."
"It is my own fault any of this was allowed to happen. I will fix it."
"Your own fault?" Tahu speaks. Fire builds up in his throat as his volume rises: "Your own fault?"
"If I hadn't conveyed the situation so badly, he would be here now."
"Then it's his own fault for not letting you explain!" his Fire brother roars, jumping upright, armor glowing hot with anger, sizzling, steaming, singing the muscles beneath it.
His younger siblings pull themselves back.
His sister snarls his name in a warning tone.
His Air brother wraps tighter around Kongu.
Onua watches.
The Toa of Fire continues his rampage, stepping all the way up to Kopaka's mask until their chests almost touch, and the difference in temperature between their rapidly cooling and heating bodies almost causes strings of steam to erupt from them: "Or for not dying in the storm, or for deciding to remain with the Makuta, or for trusting them because they welcomed him, or for falling for whatever Teridax did to him because he was alone and vulnerable, or for figuring out something was amiss! Or maybe it's their fault for not doing the same!" and his hand points at the other three Mata before going back to his heartlight: "It's my fault for not telling any of them! It's our fault for deciding to keep this to ourselves! It's our fault, all six of us, for not being able to work as a team! Or maybe it's Helryx's fault for not telling everything to all of us herself, Hydraxon's fault for raising us as he did, the Order's fault for being so secretive, Artakha's fault for making us, Mata Nui's fault for needing us to be made in the first place! Maybe it's even the Great Beings' fault somehow!"
His Ice brother stares him down, brows furrowed, mouth scowling, and for a split second everybody is back on Mata Nui on those first days of their second life and they're going to bring out their swords and try to cleave each other in half.
But Tahu slightly deflates as he breathes hard and tilts his head to better meet the other's eyes when he averts them.
"It's either nobody's fault or everybody's fault," he says with a growl in his voice but no aggression: "There are too many steps that led to where we are now to pin the blame on only one person."
Kopaka does not reply.
He clenches his hand hard; then releases it.
"I won't hurt him."
"I know that. But he is going to hurt you, because he wants to. And you won't manage to defend yourself, because none of us can."
It's the truth.
They all know it's the truth.
Because despite everything that being is still Pohatu, and they love him more than he may hate them.
Even the waves are quiet now.
They're all at a stall.
Softly, very softly, it's Takanuva who breaks the silence.
"When the darkness was taking over me, and I was mad with anger," he says slowly, hands still ghosting over his bruises, "Kopaka stopped me - he spoke to me, forced me to calm down and return to my senses. And Lewa once confided that, when he was almost made delirious by the krana's voices, it was Kopaka who managed to soothe him and send them away."
He raises his shining eyes to his two older brothers.
Maskless and still painfully numbed as he is, he looks so tired.
So small, despite his height.
Jaller gently wraps a hand around his arm as if to steady him. It seems to work - at least a little, as Takanuva shuffles imperceptibly in his seat.
"And when... Against the Bohrok-kal, the Vahi..." he speaks quietly, gaze locked onto Tahu's: "I could see. Through Gali, I could see. They were all trying to reach out to you, but the only voice that stirred you was Kopaka's."
He hushes again.
There is no need to make his argument explicit: it's not hard to read through the lines he draws with an unsteady hand.
The Toa Mata of Fire sighs deeply, eyes closed before he looks to the ground in a grim kind of agreement; his siblings make no sound, but do the same.
The Toa Mahri remain as they are, curled on the ground like Matoran - eager to do something for them, to be of help, any help, but unable to provide it, just like Matoran. Their size, weapons, masks and elemental powers feel useless, pointless, their steadfast heroism vain as their determination crumbles beneath an indescribable fear.
They hate their paralysis. They hate it, and they want to break out of it, they need to break out of it.
But to do so is to stand before their brother who smiled at them so fondly like they were his whole world once, when they were small and so much weaker, and they know they cannot do that.
Takanuva inhales a shaky breath.
He feels like he has done nothing but being saved, even now.
His wrists and ankles flare up with pain as something deep and uncomfortable twists and turns in his chest, like a dozen leeches squirming within it.
Pohatu still loves him.
What Hewkii said... How he tried to bargain with Makuta to let him live... Pohatu still loves him.
Maybe he just had a moment of weakness. Maybe he was so shaken that Teridax managed to worm himself in his brain and convince him, and that's why he...
Maybe - maybe, if he can stop panicking, he can finall save someone.
Maybe he can finally, properly help.
His voice trembles a little: "I will come with you."
"No." Kopaka shuts him down immediately. "I cannot ask you to and I do not want you to."
His hand is almost soft as it sits for a moment on Takanuva's head, apologizing silently for his harsh tone; its gentle chill pulsing against the protodermis skull distracts the Toa of Light from his thoughts and insecurity and phantom pains for a while, barely a few seconds, but it's enough to make it all hurt a little less.
He knows he couldn't have helped him anyways.
Not while he's like this.
The Toa of Ice breathes.
He faces his siblings, solemn: "I will bring him back," he promises.
"Those are loaded words," Onua only says softly.
All eyes turn to him.
He does not move yet, for a short time: he times the length of his exhales and inhales, steadying his heartlight and mind before his own thoughts crush them both with their weight.
At last his green gaze rises until it locks onto Kopaka's blue irises.
"I need you to promise us something," he speaks slowly, carefully. "In place of your own vow."
The following silence awaits his request.
"Promise to bring yourself back."
No answer.
His Ice brother's momentary confusion clears in the blink of an eye; his shoulder freeze slightly, his jaw sets itself a little tighter.
Onua begins another sentence, but stops himself. His eyelids fall to allow him the respite of a tunnel's lack of light after a terrible day beneath the blinding sun, so that he may be able to construct himself properly before he falls apart.
"If millenia of hatred and bitterness have taken Pohatu so far from us that we cannot hope to reach him anymore," he finally continues, ever so slow, ever so careful, "We will have to accept as much, as painful as it may be to do so, and mourn him as loudly as we would any fallen sibling. But I do not think any of us could bear to lose two brothers at once."
No other Toa speaks.
The waves keep rocking quietly.
Hewkii has hushed in his sister's hold.
"I will do everything I can," Kopaka promises.
"That is not what I asked of you," Onua replies.
His eyes are so very soft.
So very tired.
"Promise you will come back," he begs him. "With or without Pohatu."
His brother stiffens.
Eighteen eyes stare at him.
Pleading him without words.
Thery can only survive so much grief.
His heartlight pulses as he struggles to breathe deeply.
He walks to Hewkii, kneels before him; it's not quite a hug what he gives him, but it's close enough, just as gentle, and not that cold.
Kopaka sinks into the waters as his armor shifts accordingly.
After he's gone, the waves return to their soft motion.
(the examples of Kopaka being weirdly good at calming troubled minds are taken from this post by @whiteheartlight, which periodically peeks through my memories like a whale through the waves and makes me look out the window thoughtfully)
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