i'm gonna make this very clear:

ABSOLUTELY NO PROANA BLOGS WILL BE TOLERATED ON THIS BLOG.

i'm 4 years into recovery and seeing that sort of content risks me relapsing.

i love taking care of my body by eating food, i love the fat on my body that protects my organs, i love the stretch marks on my body that show how much i've grown, i love how a full stomach feels, i love myself AND my body.

fatness is not a bad thing, it's important to have fat on your body, it keeps you safe and protects you. having fat on your body and being a fat person is beautiful.

the nasty impact of media and capitalism villainizing having fat on your body is the real issue, not our bodies that work so hard to keep us alive.

no matter the weight of my body, i deserve food and so do you.

︻̷┻̿═━一

˅ɞ♡⃛ʚ˅

you aren't just like a god to me, you ARE my god. i am at your beck and call, your words are my scripture and i live to serve you.

i would sacrifice everything to show you my devotion, i give all i have to you, my time, my wealth, my soul, all of them are yours for the taking.

you are the light that guides me, i ascend when i am in your presence for to me, being with you is my heaven.

i will give you my all until it consumes me, until you consume me, until there is nothing left.

˖◛⁺⑅♡

i hear your heart beating under the floorboards

the walls are bleeding your blood

i love living inside of you

we're slowly becoming one

˖◛⁺⑅♡

Random af but i cam across ur page after seeing lots of yanderecore n i really appreciate ur kinda sober/realistic look on it and making sure ur partner isnt uncomfortable, i have bipolar and am feeling v obsessive rn but this help kinda consolidate being realistic n feeling this way greatly appreciated :D

aw, i'm so glad you feel that way! thank you :)

i know i don't post often anymore, but i still feel these intense kind of feelings and i think it's really important to acknowledge that obsessive tendencies are a real thing that real people experience and not just fictional characters, or worse, just a fetish.

i know a lot of people who identify with the term "yandere" are typically people who have suffered from a lot of trauma and/or are dealing with harsh mental disorders much like myself, so despite this blog being a place to vent my intrusive thoughts, i felt it was still important to share the healthier and more realistic side of how i was feeling!

there's ways to both express these intense feeling and also respect those around you, and im glad that's the message i've been able to share in this community :)

cannibalism is the deepest (craziest) form of romance imo. like you're experiencing such an all consuming love for someone that you lose yourself completely, disregarding your entire code of ethics because you're overcome with desperation and raw urge. you need your lover to be a part of you, to be inside of you, to be closer to you than they could ever be otherwise. you need to sink your teeth into their tender flesh and know what they smell like, what they taste like, because you need all of your senses to be overwhelmed by your love for them. you cannot live without them to the point where you cannot live alongside them either; the two of you must join together as one, regardless of the cost. it's not enough to hear their heart beating through their chest, you have to feel it against your tongue.

Any advice for worrying that your obsession with your partner(s) is starting to affect them negatively?

my best advice i can give is to communicate your concerns directly!

ask them if your behavior or the way you've been expressing your feelings for them has been harmful to them; and if it has been discuss other ways you can show your love for them and obsession with them that are more uplifting to them!

ask questions about their love language and what things you could do that would bring them more joy and occupy your time in a way that you also find enjoyable!

sometimes your partner(s) may need space away from you, which i understand can be really difficult. however, maybe during those times you can focus on what things you can do for them during the time that they're gone so that you still feel close to them and they also get something nice out of it, making them even happier to see you every time they've been away!

all in all, being vulnerable and sharing your concerns with your partner(s), while also being willing to accept criticism and come to a compromise, is the best way you can go about it, even if it's scary

i hope this helps and everything goes well! i know how scary it can be to worry that your love is overbearing... you have so much that you want to give to them and there's nothing wrong with you for that. you deserve the same love you put out.

im the anon from before, your post was very insightful and it's interesting.

to add on, i can't imagine hating my darling, to be honest. the people around him though? ive definitely had violent thoughts and been very nasty. i try to keep these in the lowdown but sometimes it feels like ill explode if i don't find something to calm down.

in those times i often find, at the very least, i want to tie him up somewhere. i want to find a way to make him think of nothing but me, and ill use some kind of manipulation for that end. and if he ever dared to think of someone else... actually, that thought does make me very violent.

hmm, am i weird?

i might approach this topic with a professional, but considering my already bad history with them im.. reluctant. i don't know, we'll see.

thank you for answering these by the way, it is very much appreciated. 💙

i don't think you're weird! the kind of jealous and possessive thoughts you described aren't very abnormal, they're just usually not talked about openly because they're socially unacceptable.

in my opinion, they could easily stem from unresolved trauma, abandonment issues, and/or BPD, they're also common symptoms in cPTSD once you've found someone that you feel safe around

it's good that you never feel like you hate your partner! that's something i unfortunately struggle with, but it's something i can easily communicate with him and once i'm financially able to ill be heading back to therapy.

i know it's difficult to find professionals that work for you, you might have to go through a lot in order to find one who listens and understands what you're feeling, but i promise that there are good therapists and psychiatrists out there! you'll just have to work to find the right one.

i know it can feel scary and isolating having these kinds of thoughts and feelings, but i promise you aren't alone in this! you can find communities to help you find support and coping mechanisms when getting professional help isn't an option! you've got this, and remember that communication is a huge part of regulating your feelings :]

im questioning if i might have o.l.d, but i feel very separate from the community — i don't experience those violent nor gory urges towards my darling, but it seems everyone else does? im just lovey dovey unless someone tries to get close or i feel i have to be stern. is this on par?

he feels the same way towards me, which i feel very lucky about.

please take what i say with a grain of salt, i'm not a psychiatrist and cannot diagnose you.

my experiences with having o.l.d does make me feel like the violent intrusive thoughts are an important symptom. they're compulsive thoughts of causing harm to your loved one or yourself, whatever it takes to make them stay.

the urges don't have to be physical violence, sometimes they're the intense urge to control and manipulate your loved one, and honestly it sometimes makes you hate them, even though you still love them.

o.l.d isn't just being possessive and obsessive over your partner, lots of people feel that way! o.l.d is debilitating, to the point where even if your partner is a horrible person you cannot and will not leave them. you'll destroy yourself for them until there's nothing left. you'll neglect your own needs for them to the point that it makes you want to kill them.

i'm lucky enough to be in a very healthy relationship right now, but i wasn't so lucky in past relationships. but even with how good things are in this relationship, i still have thoughts about harming my partner.

if you identify with a lot of the symptoms of o.l.d, but not the violent urges, you should still talk to a professional, but i personally wouldn't think you have o.l.d if it isn't debilitating for you

hi everyone! i know i've been inactive but i have some news!

i am officially one day on testosterone!

i literally can't vent anywhere to anyone because i don't want anyone to hate him.

gentle reminder that my requests are currently closed

i'll do everything that's currently in my inbox once i'm feeling better, but any new requests starting now will be deleted

remember to check my pinned post before making requests, thanks!

yandere sero x bakusquad for anon!!

uhm - yandere board .. sero hanta ,,, bakusquad ? where he likes all of them and is obsessed with keeping them all happy and safe with an underlying threat of suicide if they aren't because they have become the very reason he's happy ?

this one was a little tough but i think i did okay! posting now