Stepd*d

The guys are all hanging out after Dr. Rock's fic assignment. Stepdad muses, “Ok. Raid went back to part 1. Can I go like 5-10 years back?”

No one speaks. Off camera, a producer whispers, “Wouldn't she be in high school?” The room explodes in cross talk. “That ain't cool man” “Gross” “BRO” “Are you tryin to get canceled?” “so fucked up” “Someone call Dr rock.”

Stepdad’s face goes white. “Jesus, not--God! I wanna go back and never marry her mom”

Trouble laughs, “I don't think so, marty mcfly.”

"but if I get divorced they'll still call me that.”

“You can't undo the whole premise of your fic, man. No one's gonna read it.”

“So?” Stepdad asks. "This is for ourselves."

Night walks stands up, takes a joint from behind his ear, and mutters, “you should get reader pregnant,” as he walks off. Vampire and Slasher look at each other like, where did that come from? Then Slasher remembers, “OH–Step, you got mail, buddy."

Stepdad sighs. “Probably just a load inquiry.”

Slasher opens the mail. "Uh, yeah. Big Daddy. He wants your whole meal plan”

Raider (Joel's Version)

2. Going with Joel

"No warnings". Prev: Day 1 - the raid.

You look at the body on the floor, and raider Joel gently gently turns your face back toward him.

“I'm taking you with me,” he announces. “It's for your own good," then under his breath, "so it's not kidnapping.”

Your eyes widen. “You're taking me?”

“Don't be scared, sweet pea. I'll protect you, take care of you, and make you cum a lot. If ya want.”

Joel drags Jack's body out of the room. Some guy shows up at the door and looks at you. “She's mine,” Joel says, then punches him in the throat. The guy chokes and stumbles away, and Joel says "Wait. Take this body with you.”

For the van ride, Joel blindfolds you and puts you on his lap. When you feel his huge dick getting hard, you bite your lip and do the slightest wiggle of your hips. He whispers, "Give it to ya later, baby. If ya want."

Raider (Joel’s Version)

Raider really wishes he never hurt sweet pea and he's doing his own fic of his fic now 🥺

1. Day 1 - at the raid

A group of bad guys is pulling you away with them on the hill, planning to hurt you and be mean with you. Joel yells, “Drop her.” They invite him to join, but Joel mows them down with his gun instead. You cover your ears and when all the guys are dead around you, Joel puts his gun around his back and jogs up the hill to you. You start to run away and he says “ain't gonna hurt ya sweet pea,” then he never does. He crouches down to check you for injuries. You hug your arms around his neck and he picks you up. He takes you inside and introduces you to Carter. Then he puts you in a room and says you can take a nap on the mattress while he gets rid of the bodies. He also says, “if you feel like sucking my dick later, I understand. there will be plenty of time for that, but only if you really want.”

A bratty little boy named jack comes to the house and demands to see you. Joel takes him to you and says, “what do you think, sweet pea? Is he still your boyfriend?” You hesitate and Joel says, “Just kidding,” and shoots jack. “I would never make you choose.” You frown, and for a moment Joel wonders if he should feel bad. “I'm sorry, sweet pea” he says, “I should've made you close your ears.”

dr. rock's fic exercise

Dr. Rock caught wind of the name change conversation. He acted like he was casually joining for dinner but they were all suspicious. Then lo and behold he swallowed a mouthful of spaghetti then blurted out, "who here feels like their name doesn't fairly reflect them?"

Vampire raised his hand and the men were supportive. Stepdad hesitantly raised his hand. Night walks stifled a laugh, and Dr. Rock shot him a cautionary look.

Next, Dr. Rock asked, "Anyone feel their warnings make them look bad?" Several men nodded, including raider. Dr. rock suggested they do some writing to cope with their guilt or identity crises. "Write your own version, and see how it makes you feel."

Raider (Joel’s Version)

Raider really wishes he never hurt sweet pea and he's doing his own fic of his fic now 🥺

1. Day 1 - at the raid

A group of bad guys is pulling you away with them on the hill, planning to hurt you and be mean with you. Joel yells, “Drop her.” They invite him to join, but Joel mows them down with his gun instead. You cover your ears and when all the guys are dead around you, Joel puts his gun around his back and jogs up the hill to you. You start to run away and he says “ain't gonna hurt ya sweet pea,” then he never does. He crouches down to check you for injuries. You hug your arms around his neck and he picks you up. He takes you inside and introduces you to Carter. Then he puts you in a room and says you can take a nap on the mattress while he gets rid of the bodies. He also says, “if you feel like sucking my dick later, I understand. there will be plenty of time for that, but only if you really want.”

A bratty boy named jack demands to see you. Joel takes him to you and says, “what do you think, sweet pea? Is he still your boyfriend?” You hesitate and Joel says, “Just kidding,” and shoots jack. “I would never make you choose.” You frown, and for a moment Joel wonders if he should feel bad. “I'm sorry, sweet pea” he says, “I should've made you close your ears.”

Part 2: Going with Joel

How would Kitten react if Slasher got this tattoo?👀🤭

If he suddenly got it, she might be like "is she okay??" And he'd be reassuring you like "oh, don't worry, she's fine. Sorry to scare you." And maybe he actually got it to reassure Ma she's the main woman in his life no matter what 🥲

Now that he "knows a guy," what if slasher wanted kitten to get a tattoo of his art one day 💀💀💀 like he takes it to the artist and makes sure he can do it and gets a quote and he can pay it. All before he even gives her the art. So he gives her his art and for the first time he watches her reaction rather than just leaving it for her. and of course she's enthusiastic like "ohh my gosh.. wow..." And he's like, 'you like it?" .And she really does lol but not because it's good. Because it must be a l*ve language or something. But when she says "yeah, thank you" with a smile. He's like. "good news," and tells her his tattoo parlor has an opening 💀

this is amazing ♥️

name change

The boys are meeting. Vampire wants to change his name. He doesn’t like the connotations.

"That word isn't even in the fic," he explains. “They picture some bad, aggressive guy in a cape."

Slasher starts to say something. Night Walks cuts him off. “I get it, man. But I like the name. It’s a nice surprise what a cool trendy guy you are.”

Vampire is pensive. “But with the warnings, it looks so dark.” He lists them, “Kidnapping?? Dubcon by captivity? I sound like a monster.”

“No ya don't,” Raider offers. “Sounds like ya got a happy reader.”

The men murmur in agreement, then Slasher blurts out, “Ya did kidnap her, didn't ya?”

Vampire looks distressed. The heels of his palms come to his temples. "That makes it sound so violent.”

“i thought you chloroformed her and put her in the back of your station wagon with your superstrength,” Slasher says. “And it was badass.”

Vampire takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, then opens them and mutters, “I had to.”

“I know ya did,” Raider says. “But we ain't gonna shake that warning, brother.”

“Yeah, he tried that,” Night Walks recalls. “Wanted it to at least say, for her own good."

name change

The boys are meeting. Vampire wants to change his name. He doesn’t like the connotations.

"That word isn't even in the fic," he explains. “They picture some bad, aggressive guy in a cape."

Slasher starts to say something. Night Walks cuts him off. “I get it, man. But I like the name. It’s a nice surprise what a cool trendy guy you are.”

Vampire is pensive. “But with the warnings, it looks so dark.” He lists them, “Kidnapping?? Dubcon by captivity? I sound like a monster.”

“No ya don't,” Raider offers. “Sounds like ya got a happy reader.”

The men murmur in agreement, then Slasher blurts out, “Ya did kidnap her, didn't ya?”

Vampire looks distressed. The heels of his palms come to his temples. "That makes it sound so violent.”

“i thought you chloroformed her and put her in the back of your station wagon with your superstrength,” Slasher says. “And it was badass.”

Vampire takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, then opens them and mutters, “I had to.”

“I know ya did,” Raider says. “But we ain't gonna shake that warning, brother.”

“Yeah, he tried that,” Night Walks recalls. “Wanted it to at least say, for her own good."

Reblog if you're okay with your followers sending memes to your ask box that remind them of you.

I saw this pic on Pinterest and thought ‘awww Sweet pea😍 and … Carter?’👀🤭

Uh oh.

She got stung on both her nipples this time 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

POV

this is not in the night walks AU. this pic is from the stash of prior asks 🖤

You haven't known Billy long, and haven't hooked up. You're his date to a beach wedding, and he gets too high. He needs to lie down, so you go to his house since it's close. You get him some water and get him situated on his bed. You're sitting on the edge of it. He's catatonic and closes his eyes. You feel weird watching him, plus you've never been in or on his bed, so you start to leave his bedroom, but he says, "no, stay." You pause for a moment and he adds, "please."

You come back to the bed and sit down. He turns on his side facing you, glassy eyes barely open, and wraps an arm around your waist. "Lay with me," he mumbles.

@not-a-unique-snowflake-blog got my wheels turning with her FMK. These three guys exist in the same AU. And for the purpose of this poll, you get to determine who does or doesn't find out what you do.

Raider = Joel in the last 2 oops 🤦‍♂️

Edit: Heck, you can even be in the river of dreams au if you want. See comments for Q&A

you can boop the fuck out of these guys (but they can't boop back)

@nightwalksjoel @raiderjoel @slasherjoel @thighsoutjoel @gilfjoel @raidersweetpea @vampirejoel @stepdadjoel @nightwalksbilly @bigdickstevemurphy @bigdaddyjoel @raiderjavip @nightwalksbilly @joeljojomiller @lincolnjoel @troublejoel @raidercarter @drrockmd

you can boop the fuck out of these guys (but they can't boop back)

@nightwalksjoel @raiderjoel @slasherjoel @thighsoutjoel @gilfjoel @raidersweetpea @vampirejoel @stepdadjoel @beachwalksbilly @bigdickstevemurphy @bigdaddyjoel @raiderjavip @nightwalksbilly @joeljojomiller @lincolnjoel @troublejoel @raidercarter @drrockmd @uncletommymiller @tommybhewitt

*knocking desperately on the door* HEY GUYS!! ANYONE HERE WHO CAN HELP A DAMSEL IN DISTRESS??!!

Can they ever! Vampire is already getting ready before you knock. Your delicious scent has roused him from his "very restful state." He puts on his cardigan and alerts the groundskeepers to prepare the menstrual spa. There's a hot tub, infrared sauna, and aromatherapy. 🌹

guest appearance pt. 3

vampire and slasher are playing checkers. slasher is trying to wrap his head around beach walks. "damn, I didn't think pumpkin would whore around like that."

Vampire bristles at the language "it's not--don't say that, it's not like that."

"no, I'm impressed," slasher admits. "Specially if night walks wasnt slangin it. When a lady needs her gash stuffed--" Vampire covers his ears.

"sorry buddy," slasher smirks. "When she needs a big cock in her vagina. She's gotta find one somewhere."

"We don't know what all happened," vampire clarifies. "You should read it and come to our next book club."

Slasher puts a checker down at a side edge and wrongly demands, "king me." vampire kings him anyway.

"ya know, one time a Harold got cucked by a Boyd."

guest appearances pt. 3

guest appearance pt. 2

stepdad is annoyed to have a harold in his fic.

Lincoln says, "better Harold than someone from the Boyd bungalow, right?"

"why?" slasher asks. a hush falls over the room.

Lincoln: "they're dangerous. Carter's got his own fan club. And Billy? Mr. steal-your-reader?"

The men tense, and night walks says, "you dunno what you're talkin' about. Go plant some strawberries, old man."

Lincoln raises his eyebrows smugly.

"what's he talkin' about," slasher asks night walks. Night walks shakes his head.

Stepdad is like, "they were on a break."

Night walks sighs, takes the joint from behind his ear, and stands up.

Vampire, the most avid reader of them all, whispers to slasher, "I'll tell you later."

Lincoln walks away, and stepdad lowers his voice. "say what you will about him. . .he keeps a pretty trim cast."