Aight so my fave shockblurr thing is secret conjuxes. Hear me out for a sec. velocitronian operative blurr and decepticon double agent shockwave and when they look at each other they know the other is a spy. But they work so well together bc they’re both fast, blurr physically and shockwave mentally. When blurr speaks, shockwave is the only one who can not only follow his thought process exactly, but completely understand the point he’s trying to make. He doesn’t ask for repetitions and rarely for clarification because /he can keep up/. And shockwave gets someone who can keep up w him in return, bc he thinks fast and makes a lot of intuitive leaps when he talks. Shockwave is a listener, and blurr is a talker, and together they make a rhythm. Theyre foils, and they complete each other and get conjuxed on the sly because even though it’s reckless and dangerous, especially considering their line of work, but they don’t care because holy shit this mech understands me and I can’t let him go bc there will never be another and hnnjskdjak But they’re both spies and their hella good spies and they know they’re not supposed to work together but they work /so well/ together and they can’t help it. They date in secret and no one suspects a fucking thing but after the first few it’s kind of a sham bc blurr’s not stupid he figures out longarm is shockwave p quick but they both know that this is it. It’s love at first sight and it’s fast and they would have it no other way. And after the whole shebang they both go back to their respective bosses, separated indefinitely, and ask the other over the bond if they had a good flight.

Firestarter

Don’t need my health Got my name and got my wealth  Stare at the sun Just for kicks all by myself

He knew, walking into the grandiose hall of justice, how it would all end. But like the failed Warlord and the powerdrunk Prime before him- he would make sure the last words he said to his one-time masters would resonate through the ages.

And when he heard them call his name, he stood up with flame decals bright and wicked and his smile toothy and falsified.

Keep reading

is there a god at the bottom of the bottle?

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Transformers (IDW Generation One), Transformers - All Media Types Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Swerve/Whirl Characters: Swerve (Transformers), Whirl (Transformers) Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Porn with Feelings, Thigh fucking, Frottage, Size Difference, Teasing, Self-Esteem Issues, Porn Watching, Trust Kink, Organ Fondling, It’s cute I promise, Swerve watches weird porn, Whirl is doing his best Summary: Swerve’s loneliness manifests itself as an unusual taste in porn. Whirl validates him, in his own way.

For @dinobotglitch <3

Relationship: Drift/Ratchet

Rating: Mature

Words: 2,058

Kink Bingo: Medical

AO3

You find the… thing by accident. Mostly because you’re being nosy and poking around Ratchet’s office, because he’s busy, but you still want to spend time with him, and meditation isn’t as exciting as he pretends you think it is.

But this is just too funny. You stay sitting where you are in front of the cabinet for a klik, just looking at it. Because this can’t be what it seems like. Right? Or maybe— But here?

You turn around and hold the thing up. “Ratchet, why do you have a spreader bar?”

Keep reading

(EMPURATA!SKIDS!EMPURATA!SKIDS!)

OKAY BEFORE I START, I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE TO NIGHTBEAT’S MUN WHO YELLS AT ME ON DISCORD WHENEVER I MENTION EMPURATA!SKIDS, ILY LINDA!

She yelled at me for this edit.

So, empurata!Skids started as this idea for Functionist Universe when Lost Light revealed where Rodimus as the others landed. I was talking to Nightbeat’s mun about how, if we were to see Skids in Functionist Universe, there was a high chance that he would have been empurata’d because of his status as an outlier (recalling that Functionists have plenty of reason to fear outliers, as they could be a threat to their taxonomy).

Keep reading

Anna Sian

Amazing Stilbite with druzy chalcedony 😍oh the amazing gems we saw at the #tucsongemshow

aromacoutureco

Paterson as a therapist specialized in helping omegas with severe PTSD.  You can head over to twitter to read the nice twitfic that was written based on this idea by Yananiris! 

MTMTE DJD realizes they have fallen in love with shy & sweet human friend? Bonus : they feel the same but don't want to lose their friendship

Irealize this is a newer ask, but I haven’t gotten any on the DJD yet exceptthis one and one other and so like I really wanted to answer this;;; Vos and Tess are kind of more platonic, I’m sorry u^u{MTMTE}TarnA bargaining chip, that’s all you were supposed to be. That’s it. You weren’tsupposed to make it into his good graces with your impeccable tastes in music,your astounding tastes in poetry, and especially not with the fact you seemed sowilling to talk to him about what the meaning behind a certain poem might beand how you could apply it. You’re a fragging organic. You were supposed to beboorish and uncivilized. If he had it in him to be mad at you, he’d yell at youfor having so much couth.He liked having you on his shoulder as he read out loud poetry he foundparticularly staggering. He enjoyed listening to your input when he paused toallow for it. He didn’t get particularly upset if you interrupted him, as longas you made a noise to warn him you were about to speak instead of justspeaking. And, of course, you know you shouldn’t have enjoyed this as much asyou did, but he was so suave and complex. It amazed and enthralled you and youfound that you couldn’t pull away from him long without finding yourself boredand lonely.“So what do you think of this, dear?” He asked after he finished a particularlyhard poem. You thought for a moment before giving your opinion onit, “That is quite an astounding thought, but I don’t think that’s quiteright… But I do enjoy that far more than my own.” He says as you move to leanagainst his helm. Neither of you are particularly sure when you fell intocalling each other nicknames. You found your relationship fairly easy.Your relationship with the DJD leader seemed to put off the other members. Yousuppose you don’t blame them, he is supposed to hate you after all, but youfind that you also don’t care. Their opinions matter little to you and you knowthey won’t say anything to He has been aware of his feelings for sometime, painfully so. You were so smalland everything he should hate. But he doesn’t and he knows his crew is losingsome respect for him, especially Nickel, he doesn’t blame her. However he findsthat he can’t bring himself to prove himself to them and why should he… Whenhe’s got everything right here? He should be disgusted or even scared… But heis merely content.KaonHonestly if it hadn’t been for how much Pet liked you, he probably never wouldhave talked to you. You were merely a bargaining chip, after all. Somethingthey would either kill or toss away when the opportunity presented itself. Heshouldn’t have gotten attached like he did, but that did nothing to deter him.He smiled a bit as he watched you climb over Pet’s head to scratch at thething’s ears.“Careful not too fall.” His voice surprises you a bit and you slip and fallstraight onto your hands and knees on Pet’s neck. You turn your head to glareat him, “Thanks.” Your dry voice has him chuckling and shaking his helm,holding out a servo for you to climb on. “My apologies.”He brings you up to sit on his shoulders, this used to make you nervous, beingso close to those coils. Now you simply sit down and curl your knees up intoyour chest, smiling at him. You couldn’t find what had prompted the suddenconfession, but here you were, mouth forming words you didn’t mean tosay. “I love you.” He’s starring at you, no no no. You’ve fucked up he’s going to kill you. Youfeel your hair start to stand on end and you scramble to your feet, spewingapologies. In your haste your foot slips and you go stumbling off his shoulder.It seems in slow motion for you, the sliding off. However falling was not inslow motion and you close your eyes tight. You hit something hard and it hurts,but not as… Bad as you were thinking? You slowly open one eye before both areblinking up at Kaon. He caught you.“Don’t apologize, stupid.” He said with almost a painful smile. He’s not goingto say it back, but you can tell. And this is a terrible situation for both ofyou.NickelShe’d deny straight to anyone’s face that she even /liked/ you. You’re anorganic for frag sake! If anyone dared to even tell her she’d taken a shiningto you they’d have onlined the next day with the inability to move. They’d alllearned to keep their slaggin mouths /shut/ about her little human helper.However, there was only so long she could deny that she did like you as afriend. That didn’t change that only /you/ were allowed to even hint at beingfriends, just don’t use the word friends she’ll smack you and tell you, you’rebeing dumb. Even if she does smack you she doesn’t do it hard and she does yellat you more often than the others. You feel the need to point it out one day asshe’s checking out what is nothing more than a deep bruise.“Huh?” Of course she pretends not to hear you as she gently presses on you legand decides it doesn’t need an x-ray, it’s clearly not broken. “Why do youyell at me more than the others?” You repeat, she makes despondent sound, she’dclearly hoped you’d just let it go.She stands straight up and glares at you, servos on her hips and the right everso slightly angled out. It made her look sassy… Oh great you were going toget yelled at… Again. “I yell at you more because you’re far more likelyto get hurt! You’re squishy and small and /breakable/. And I couldn’t handle ifI lost you like I lost…” She stopped as her vents hitched. Oh.You get up and move to wrap your arms around her neck. Her arms found themselvesaround your waist. She didn’t even like to admit she was /friends/ with theorganic wrapped tightly in her arms… How… How was she supposed to face thatshe loved you?

VosWhen you first got here he hated you. He wouldn’t look at you and, sometimes,when Tarn needed to make videos with you in them to send to the Autobots, he’dhave actually left the room. You’re assumption that it was simply because youwere organic had been, of course, wholly correct. You wished you couldunderstand the insults he’d thrown your way so, with what *very little*freedoms you had, you learned that /damn impossible/ language. The next time he spoke, after you’d finally learned enough of the language tounderstand, and you heard him call you the Cybertronian equivalent of a /cow/you shot back. His surprised face was /well/ worth the crying and frustrationit had taken to learn how to call someone the equivalent of a walking dick, orin this case spike. He was clearly between impressed and angry. You didn’treally blame him, you’d be mad too if someone called you a dick.“Impressive.” Was what he finally settled on and you could see the smirk in hisfeatures. If you had known /learning fucking primal vernacular/ to get on hisgood side you’d have done it from the fucking beginning.Being on Vos’ good side was apparently a God send. It got you far morefreedoms, a ride on his shoulder occasionally, and the /amazing/ ability totrash talk everyone that didn’t know what the fuck you were saying. It was bestfriends for life and, honestly, neither of you could believe you’d ever hatedeach other.TesarusNeither of you had even known the other existed at first. He was never aroundwhen you were around and they didn’t often ask the guy with the blades for a stomachto watch a squishy human. No one could blame anyone for not passing thefigurative torch over to Tess. So, him finding you had been a complete accidentand a mere happenstance. He’d been bored with his usual duties and had taken towondering the halls and you had /just/ required a little more freedom to roamfreely. You had somehow managed to talk your way through it, you couldn’texactly escape in space. He’d almost stepped on you, but one can’t ignore screaming.That had been something, watching a giant with blades for a tum get flusteredand confused about the human he’d almost stepped on. It was kind of cute. After that he’d found himself finding you somehow interesting. It was farbetter than personal development plans and health checks, that’s for sure. Atfirst you were just something to keep him busy when he got bored and that wasthe only time he was ever handed you. He had to specifically ask. Eventually itturned to where you or he would seek the other out, mostly you, to hang out. Ifanyone asked he was elevating boredom as well as keeping track of you, however.“Hey, hey! Tess, listen!” You shouted and he allowed you to climb up his arm tohalf dangle off his shoulder. “What is it?” He asked, voice a bit deadpanned. “Sexwhile camping is fucking in tents.” You spoke completely seriously, lip noteven twitching up in a smile as your eyes stared in to his optics. You almostthought he wasn’t going to do anything before a smile was cracked and thenturned into a loud laugh, you quickly following suit. “You’re the worst.” He says, still laughing. Through your giggles you manage, “Yeah.”Helex

He really didn’t seem to have an opinion you in the beginning, he was just theone that had to watch you the most. The others didn’t like your presence and hejust didn’t seem to care about you or their opinion on how much time he spentwhere. He did like that you’d play video games with him, what little he couldfind and keep that it is. At first, he had been totally and completely indifferentto you as a person. You were just someone he had to watch and someone whoplayed games with him. Other than that, he hardly ever even talked to you.That seemed to have changed rapidly, however, as playing games soon began todevolve into making jokes at the other expense and trying to mess up the otherduring games. That soon began to devolve into just hanging out and enjoyingeach other, as friends. He liked you, you were funny and you got his humor andyou weren’t absolutely terrified of his… well everything.You were sprawled across the floor after a crushingloss at the hands of Helex, being made fun of for just how much you completely sucked. You grinned a bit asyou turned your head to look into bright red eyes, “Shut up, you nerd.” Helaughed and shook his head, “Not happening, loser.” He grunted back as he smirkeddown at you.He chuckled a bit as he moved to scoop you up into his smaller servos and placeyou on his shoulder. You tended to like how warm he was, like a heating pad, ithelped you relax. You chose to lay on his shoulder more than sit. He smiled abit as he watched you lay back and relax into his plating, thinking to himselfjust how adorable and beautiful you were.Wait… Oh slag. He needed a frikkin miracle.

Hi, Blue! I'm guessing Tumblr ate my ask about a yandere DJD (since it was sent the same evening as the nick name ask and you ain't answered it) I'm gonna send it again. Human gets found by DJD, captured, caged, yada yada yada, and DJD find them selves getting fond of that tiny fleshbag. The human figures out they've gone yandere, and has each of them -well, almost all of them- wrapped around their little finger. Sure, they think, I'm in deep shit, but I'm the most protected human in the galaxy.

I didn’t actually get this earlier, so thank you for resending.  These are going to be waaaay out of character for our resident, murderous organiphobes, but frag it, i’m in the mood for scary robot cuddles!  Enjoy your diet yandere DJD, fam!  XD

You get fought over a lot whenever the DJD decide they’re in a cuddly mood (which is more often than you’d think for a gang of sadistic murderers)  Of course, it’s less like tender, affectionate cuddling and more like creepy, possessive, “I need to physically dominate this human to show how much better I am than them as a species” type petting.

Tarn likes to pull you into his lap a lot whenever he’s working, or just relaxing after a long day.  He strokes your hair like a Bond villain with a cat.  It’s a total power play, not only to show you who’s running the show, but to let everyone one else know as well.  He loves the affect that idly stroking his little “pet” as he talks has on people.  Deathasaurus has lost his train of thought many a time while talking to Tarn simply because he was too distracted by those sharp talons tracing gently along your back.

Vos and Kaon often fight over who gets to hold you.  Kaon sees you as more of a pet (possibly a companion for his prized turbo fox), while Vos just likes to feel bigger than somebody.  (He’s the aft that laughs whenever you get upset or cry.)  You can’t understand a word he says, so you never know if he’s insulting you or sweet talking you, but he always uses the same raspy sounding purr as he murmurs into your ear.  (He also tends to be a bit rough with his “cuddles”.  Expect several bruises and scrapes.)  Kaon is much gentler, but still just as intimidating.  He’s much more affectionate than his team mates so he’s usually the one picking you up for cuddles.  He’ll often have himself sandwiched between you and his turbo fox, stroking the two of you and cooing about how much he loves his sweet little “pets”.

Tesarus for the most part leaves you alone (he’s not a very touchy-feely kind of guy) but he does certainly see why the others obsess over you so often.  I mean, for an organic, you’re not half bad looking.  You catch him watching you frequently out of the corner of his optics (at least, you think you do.  That visor makes it hard to tell.)  He loves to watch you sleep.  Sometimes you’ll drift off in another part of the Peaceful Tyranny, only to awaken in Tesarus’ room, with the menacing bot looming over you.

Helex is the most territorial of the lot.  He likes to have you all to himself and growls at the others if they try to approach (except for Tarn, of course.)  He has a habit of licking things to claim them as his.  (As if being forcibly cuddled by a giant, walking death machine all the time wasn’t bad enough, now you have to deal with alien slobber.) He’ll drag his tongue over your face and your body as you whimper, while softly growling “mine” over and over under his breath.

Ok but in retrospect? This page at the very beginning of MTMTE tells you, immediately, everything you will need to know about Tailgate. Not just that he has anxiety issues and phenomenally low opinion of himself (panels 1 & 2), but look what he’s saying in panel 3:

Without him, the mission is doomed to failure. This is manifestly false. Tailgate’s a sanitation bot (fourth class). If he doesn’t make it to launch, the worst that will happen is Ark 1 takes off with some minor crud in its ducts. Tailgate is confabulating. Here, now, in a lonely dark hole with no audience. Which suggests that he began fabricating heroic backstories for himself before he arrived on the Lost Light, before he had anyone to impress or inveigle. He’s not spinning tales to gain an advantage or make friends; he’s doing it to comfort himself, to give his mishap a sense of real urgency and to give himself a sense of purpose. Tailgate copes with an indifferent, frightening world by living in a fantasy. And it’s not maladaptive. In his fabricated role as hero, he manages to keep his head and solve a very real, very desperate predicament in a rather ingenious way:

It’s a bit of a hail Mary, but the crazy thing is it works, and it’s not the only time Tailgate saves himself (and others) with some spontaneous lateral thinking. He is, after all, the one who stops an onslaught of Legislators with a last-minute rewrite of the Autobot Code. He also had the presence of mind to defeat Tyrest with a strategic poke to the forehead.

My argument? Tailgate is an incredibly bright, imaginative bot whose rich interior life not only props him up when he’s feeling low but gives him critical, life-saving ideas nobody else would have. His imagination, I would argue, is both his comfort and the source of his latent courage and confidence.

And it’s all right here on page 1.

so here is the sound I always pictured Starscream making when I say he “trills” or “clicks”- its the sound of a compsognathus, lower pitched and altered slightly. I did the altering, you can find the original sounds on youtube under “compy sounds” 

Jonathan Crane [Christmas Headcanon]

I like to think Jonathan has a real distaste for the holiday season–and no, not just because Halloween is over. A lot his feelings would stem from his abusive childhood. Growing up with little money, didn’t expect much for Christmas other than a new sunday suit if the previous one had outgrown him. (or the more often than not, the old ensemble was worn out due to punishment)

Imagine a young, curious and intelligent Jonathan Crane, always sneaking behind his Great Grandmother’s back to educate himself on the world around him. Around this time of year he would overhear the other school children recount tales of sugarplums, stockings hung with care, cookies with milk set out by the fireplace, dancing reindeer hoofs on the rooftop, and oh so much more! Jolly St. Nick, he left toys for all the good boys and girls! All except for one….

Why not him? 

Because he was deemed undeserving in the eyes of Great Granny. A sinful devil child such as himself was not allowed such trivial delights. What he needed was to be cleansed and to be free to these selfish desires. He should aspire to be pure in the eyes of the Lord. This meant a lot of forced church sermons and perhaps, extra punishments if she deemed it appropriate. A lump of coal is nothing compared to a flock of wild crows…

                   they molded you into a monster 

                        sharpened your claws

                                         your fangs

                                      ripped out everything good and holy

                                  made you howl until your throat burned

                  maybe it’s time to show them what a mistake they’ve made

                          they should never have given you such a  b i t e 

Seeker Roddy AU

Rodimus missed the sky.

How, one might ask, do you miss something you see every day?

When your wings are torn from your back, and there’s little chance of ever flying again. Missing it - or rather, remembering it for what it had been - was all you could do.

He was told that whoever harvested his spark from the hotspot seriously messed up, and extensive frame modifications had been necessary in order to continue function.

An oversized spoiler that took the place of wings. Speed, a subpar replacement for the elation of flight. Power from foot thrusters converted to exhaust pipes that spit vibrant fire.

But the truth was undeniable: Hot Rod of Nyon had the spark of a seeker. A seeker’s spark, confined to a grounder’s frame. It was almost cruel.

Some days, the sky-sickness was almost unbearable.

Some days, the ragged edges of a lost trine bond still haunted his spark.

So he adapted. The overcharged, unused energy within his spark manifesting as flames, which he boldly painted on his chest. A message to all others: This will not break me.

So he raced. When racing, pushing his engine to the limits, surroundings blurring to a haze, it was easy to forget.

The ache, he theorized, came from an overabundance of energy - so Hot Rod became lively, hyper, almost overly-enthusiastic. A cheerful mask to combat the hollowness he felt inside.

With time, it got better, as most things do.

With time, it was almost possible to forget what he had lost.

But some days, Rodimus turns his optics to a sky that is colored in soft ombres with wispy clouds, an invitation impossible to answer still heard in the liting breeze that flowed around his frame, a cruel reminder of what could have been… and he wants, so badly, to return home.

Relationship: Drift/Ratchet

Rating: Mature

Words: 2,058

Kink Bingo: Medical

AO3

You find the… thing by accident. Mostly because you’re being nosy and poking around Ratchet’s office, because he’s busy, but you still want to spend time with him, and meditation isn’t as exciting as he pretends you think it is.

But this is just too funny. You stay sitting where you are in front of the cabinet for a klik, just looking at it. Because this can’t be what it seems like. Right? Or maybe— But here?

You turn around and hold the thing up. “Ratchet, why do you have a spreader bar?”

Keep reading