Bothering the beast

there are some internet friends where eventually you start calling them by their real name and then there’s times where its like nah son your name is crispy forever

coughing into my elbow in all places (as i should) except the shower where i am free to cough like an ipad toddler playing minecraft

we talk a lot about ohhhh what if my calling is to be the greatest mammoth hunter ever and I'm wasting my talents in the modern era but we never think about what if Thog from 30,000 BCE was the only person ever born who could get a sub-7min Donkey Kong Country any%, and he never got the chance. what about thog

man. the star wars sequel trilogy could have been so good if they hadn't fucked it up

Nothing gives the same kind of random ego boost like managing to finally clean up your home and making it nice. Like ooh look at me, I'm living like people do, I made myself iced tea and I am eating my snack from a real plate. I got floors and shit.

the fact that we need 8 hours of sleep is ridiculous we should only need 4 and the other 4 should be used to be cozy in your bed and rub your legs together like a cricket and listen to music and think about your little scenarios

Girl you need to get out of bed faster than this

the hightown chantry was probably sheltering orphans and refugees et cetera, and you can tell this because the moment your character arrives in kirkwall as a refugee, they get locked in the chantry prison on the orders of the chantry enforcers so that everyone poor can be forced out. this was subtle foreshadowing that the hightown chantry regularly shelters woebegone innocents. you can tell because the chantry is a place the player regularly goes to, where there are never any npcs who could be remotely described as that

what studying literature feels like

man left without meaningful tasks for a week seen walking around with a notepad to critically assess all the wall-ceiling angles in his home with genuine contempt

Nice consequences, did your actions pick them out for you ?

Lmao how is this real, "the ambient sounds of the world were wrong, sir"

I’m chronically offline but Tumblr doesn’t count = I’m California sober.

one day I’ll finally write that ridiculously elaborate fanfiction that I’ve been carefully constructing in my daydreams for months and then you’ll be sorry. you’ll all be sorry.

ilya kaminsky, “we lived happily during the war”