I just read your post about how easily Bella was able to adjust to vampirism, and do you think it was has something to do with she had already tasted human blood before she turned?

like if we go for the eternal damnation angle, where after you're turned you're supposed to drain the life of the kind you belonged to but that doesn't happen to Bella nor does she suffer through it as she had already tasted Blood and thus had already damned herself therefore making her immune???

I mean I know Smeyer didn't go for that angle but this adds an added layer of depth and darkness to the whole "Eww Bella drank Human Blood and LIKED IT" and " Wow, Bella has adjusted so well to being a vampire" like i feel like it ties the whole thing up in a neat lil bow

I could get behind this! She's already tasted human blood, "screwed her total," as she said, before she even becomes a vampire, and so she's primed for it, she's already doomed. There's no angst because the vampire essence had already taken root. I could also accept that the James bite did something to her, or even the pregnancy had changed her in a way that made the adjustment to vampirism less of a shock to the system.

I still wouldn't love that it was such an easy, non-event though. I don't, personally, feel like becoming a supernatural creature with an insatiable blood thirst is something you can really "mentally prepare" for. Like sure, making the choice beforehand and being informed might take the edge off; it could remove a few of the layers of chaos and fear, and that could help. She's not waking up in a strange world surrounded by strange people like the others were. But it should still be hard. You're still dealing with all-new senses, all-new instincts, all-new painful bloodthirst. "I just thought about it and made up my mind not to eat people!" is such a boring explanation.

And also, for me, the whole thing I found compelling was this sort of impossibly difficult and painful self-denial the Cullens had going on. It's only interesting if it's difficult. Newborn!Carlisle banishing himself to the woods and trying to starve himself for months and then spending centuries perfecting his self-control enough to be a doctor is just WAY more interesting to me than Bella hanging out with her human dad on day 2 of vampirism. Alice wandering alone and trying to make sense of her visions and having only "sporadic success" at not eating people is a hundred times more interesting to me than newborn!Bella dressing up all sexy and going to meet a lawyer. The mental image of Carlisle, Edward, Esme and Rosalie ALL having to tackle newborn!Emmett to try and keep him from eating someone because he's so outrageously strong is way more compelling (and scary! and sad!) than Bella just getting "distracted" by Edward and not eating the hikers. Jasper still struggling with the bad habits he picked up in the vampire wars; Rosalie killing her attackers without spilling a drop of blood because she knew she wouldn't be able to resist that; lovely gentle Esme slipping up and killing people and having to come home to Dr. Perfect Record with red eyes. Edward going on his rebellion because he didn't want to be in pain any more. THAT's the stuff I find compelling, that's the stuff that sucked me into this series.

But totally! At least explain her success with some actual lore. She's already tasted blood, she's already been bitten, she's been somehow changed by the nightmare pregnancy. All of that is better than "mentally prepared." Or at the very very very least really make it clear her success was about her circumstances. It was easier for her because she was informed and supported, not because she's innately magic or unusually self-controlled.

vegans make peace with honey

no shut up do it

Hurt myself by thinking about Andrew Minyard— who absolutely hates the word please. Refuses to say it or let anyone else say it around him.

Finally whispering it as a last resort after Neil has been in some horrific accident and they don’t know if he’ll ever wake up. And Andrew is just sitting in the room with Neil. It’s been months and everyone is tired and out of hope and Andrew just… kind of breaks. He knows the word doesn’t work— it never has before. But still. Some small part of him wants it to this time. He wants it to make up for all the times it never worked before.

So he just holds Neil’s hand, and whispers it. And it makes him ANGRY because he hasn’t said that awful word since he was a kid. And now there’s Neil who isnt making him say it but who he wants to say it for because Neil can’t. Neil’s trapped in his own mind and can’t fend or protect himself.

No one has ever respected that word when it came to Andrew before but if there’s anyone in the world that would… it would be Neil.

Neil doesn’t wake up. Not for several more months. But when he does he tells Andrew that he heard him.

Thinking about how Andrew choked Kevin when he realised Neil was missing.

Andrew who would kill anyone who looked at Kevin the wrong way. Andrew who would stab whomever if it meant Kevin was safe. Andrew who saw a broken raven and said I’ll protect you and meant it and kept that promise like his life depended on it.

Andrew who nearly killed Allison because of a promise. Andrew who would’ve never talked to Neil again because of a promise.

Yet when there was ambulances and injured foxes and you were amazing before Neil’s gear with his phone, with a 0 on screen and a Baltimore caller ID, Andrew turned on Kevin.

Can you imagine being the other foxes and watching that happen? Knowing what Andrew would do to them for so much as breathing at Kevin in the wrong direction, now Neil was missing and Andrew was hurting Kevin and something is happening here.

Andrew and Kevin don’t have the luxury of a second language to talk to each other in, either. Whereas secrets were usually shared in French and German so the others couldn’t understand, now there’s nothing to hide behind, and Andrew doesn’t care either. Where is Neil, who is he, who’s taken him, is he safe? Is he alive?

Then picture being Kevin, knowing Andrew, knowing what this means, that Neil is more important to Andrew than he is now, so much so that he would hurt him for Neil. Not only does he know that; but he knows there’s a good chance that Neil is dead. If it’s his father, it’s not the Moriyama’s; he is the butchers son, after all, and the butcher was never keen to spare a life.

So the foxes know nothing and everything at the same time on that bus journey out to wait for his return. They know they’re hurt, that something is very wrong. They know Kevin has bruises around his neck, and Andrew can’t look him in the eye. They think they understand now why Neil got everything he asked for from Andrew; and Andrew thinks he might never see him again.

I’d say it was the quietest bus journey of their lives.

Aaron Minyard in the foxhole court specifically, character of all time. moisturized unbothered in his lane etc etc. he's got like two and a half lines and pops off with each one. serves cunt on the court. serves cunt on the dancefloor. he's hardly present so he's at his least aggressive out of all three books, in his unproblematic era. doesn't care about anyone's drama but best believe he's paying attention. mans is in the kitchen doing dishes while the others are throwing fits and acting out. king shit.

i wanna talk about this scene because its one of my favourite character moments for both aaron and neil. theyve just gotten to the cabin, only a handful of days after nathans death, and aaron gets neil alone and says this:

now listen. maybe what aaron is doing here is exactly what it looks like. maybe he is concerned that neil is exploiting andrew, and this is him being a protective brother. and i do think theres a part of him that is. he could also be reacting badly due to homophobia, and maybe a part of him is too. but mostly -

he's testing neil.

see, aarons not totally heartless. in that moment in baltimore, when neil was bloody and beaten to shit - aaron was horrified with the rest of them. he might not like neil particularly much, but when you see someone you moderately dislike tortured past the point of human endurance, youre going to put aside your dislike for a second. youre going to take their side, and aaron does. when the foxes claim neil, aaron is right up there with them.

but unlike neil and andrew, who spend the next few days in the emotional wringer with the feds, aaron had several days to process. to really process what allison pointed out to them.

and he realized he could use it.

maybe thats callous of him, but mostly its inevitable; this is how the twins have learned to communicate, to leverage each other with bribes and threats. he watched andrew nearly kill kevin, pick a fight with the feds, grip neils hoodie like he might disappear if he didnt hold on tight enough, and he understood that there was nothing andrew wouldnt do for neil.

meanwhile, neil is still coming off of weeks of telling himself, gritted teeth, its fine so long as andrew doesnt care about me, its fine so long as andrew doesnt care about me, its fine so long as andrew doesnt care about me...

hes barely begun to acknowledge the much less dangerous fact that he has feelings for andrew. less dangerous because if andrew doesnt care about him, then neils death wont hurt him, and neils feelings cant be hurt if hes the one that dies. but if andrew has feelings for him, then this whole time hes been risking that his death would break andrew - break the very person he most wants to protect.

so neil denies it. hes made the first wobbly step towards freedom, but he hasnt yet dealt with the moriyamas. he could still die at any moment. wrapping his head around his fathers death hasnt given him enough time to break those weeks of conditioning himself in the dark. andrew doesnt care about me. andrew cant care about me. neil will go to war for andrew but the idea that the converse is true is too dangerous to look at directly. to protect andrew, to protect himself, he denies it.

but when aaron asks neil if andrew will fight for him, he's not really asking. we can see it in the casual way he shrugs off neils denial. he doesnt care what neil says. he wants to see what neil does. he already knows - or has a pretty strong bet - what andrew will do. what he needs to know is if neil is serious.

listen, i am personally of the belief that if andrew released aaron from his deal for neils sake and then things went sour with neil, andrew would respect the broken deal anyway. but i dont think aaron sees that - he hasnt yet fully internalized that andrew does things out of his own brand of fairness, and not out of malice. so he needs to know; andrew will fight for this. will neil?

so he lobs a grenade at neil, a loaded accusation, and neil comes back swinging. and theres aarons answer. neil isnt exploiting andrew, hes not just playing around. hes as viciously protective of andrew as andrew is of him and those two repressed assholes might not be saying it with words, but aarons not stupid. andrew gave himself away when neil went missing and now neils showed his hand too.

neils right. he has been had, and hes just lucky that what aaron wants is exactly what neil wanted anyway.

Hey so Canada is apparently erasing "Palestine" from people's documents. If you apply for a new document to be issued, you have to say you have no place of birth, with Palestine not being an actual option you can use

World's most moral army's most noble soldiers...

I won't lie, as an aroace person myself I am so fucking sick of people drawing CANONICALLY AROACE CHARACTERS in sexual/romantic relationships and saying "well aroace people can still have sex and be in relationships."

Like YES that IS POSSIBLE!! But also we can be fucking sex repulsed and have NO romantic desires and we have a right to be upset when all of the characters that we are supposed to be able to relate to have these labels ignored!!!

ONE AROACE CHARACTER THAT ISNT ROMANTICISED OR SEXUALISED IS ALL I WANT!!!! O N E !!!!

Repost of Instagram post by alessandra_sanguinetti:

“In 2004 I worked as an intern in Newsweek and had to go through the wires coming in from the Middle East.

The Iraq war was raging. Israel was committing its routine violations and killings.

The images were devastating and unequivocally condemning of both the USA and Israel, but I remember the editors would reject all my picks and demand images of burnt cars or vague images of destruction.

So I brought a hard drive and collected everything they didn't publish.

It was my first live glimpse of the lack of ethics or integrity in most US media.

Not the journalists on the ground, but of the senior editors making the calls - in their self important glass cubicles.

And no, to the cynics out there..it's not all too complicated to discuss on social media.

Social media is the only reason we know what's happening in Palestine.

And the only reason mainstream news has to keep up and sprinkle some actual news now and then.

Meanwhile we are seeing much less footage coming out of Gaza - Israel has been killing off all the journalists.

This is terrifying.”

Photo credits: Nasser Ishtayeh, Yossi Alon, Saif Dahlah, Jaafar Ashtiyeh, Musa Al-Shaer, Abed Onar Qusini

My heart breaks just by looking at it. Those animals are robbing their childhood, their innocence, their families, their lives.

This isn't the first time. Last year, the IDF would leave behind explosives disguised to look like toys (they did this in Lebanon as well)