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#you really can be a high int cleric yall
sleepymccoy · 2 years
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I know I'm meant to be working on my chore list, but I'm still having my coffee so
I like playing, like, false classes in dnd. It makes for fun character structure for me.
So, I've played a wizard who was pretending to be a cleric. I found a way to get a few healing spells and I think it was second game when my party got suspicious that I had all these big damage spells but not greater restoration. Tonnes of fun
Now I'm playing a barbarian pretending to be a wizard or bard, mainly just high int and really focusing on lore keeping. He's writing a book. I managed to get the alarm spell as a race trait, but it all came out when I went into a rage lol. Altho one mate did still think I was multi class! Good win
I want to play a druid pretending to be something else, but druids are pretty specific I'm finding. I don't wanna be ranger cos that's too close. Would love to make her a fighter but druids can barely fight and can't wear solid armour. Does anyone know a little back to druids I could pull that'd get me looking more like a fighter class? Or a race that gives me some weapon proficiency?
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some new(ish) kids
“new” as in they didn’t exist yet when we last posted. so some of them are at least 9 months old. anyway!
list under the cut:
CAS
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- they’re a half-elf monk! but now that i think about it it would be kinda funny if they had a level or two in rogue
- honestly? they’re a frat boy, but one who drinks respect women (and everyone, really) juice
- complete thembo. they have a -1 int, but +5 dex and +3 cha so who’s really winning here
- seriously when i say they’re a thembo i mean it. cas can dodge bullets all day but they don’t know that a tomato is a fruit
- they’re a people person and respectful and are very much work hard play hard. i love them
PUMPKIN
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- now this is a bastard right here
- he/they tiefling rogue. yes they stole that crown what about it
- very much like mollymauk tealeaf i’m not gonna lie. they’ll charm the pants off of you and run away with your whole coin pouch
- smth i love about pumpkin is 1) their last name is pye 2) they have aliases bc in nearly every town they’ve been in there’s a warrant out for his arrest
- pumpkin pye (persona), a flirty rapscallion. if they had to pick one alias to stay as, this would be that one
- apple pye, a quiet sweetheart. kinda country bumpkin-esque
- pecan pye, taciturn but honest (as he can be while using an alias and on the run from the law and generally up to no good) and a hard worker
 - underneath all the layers? he’s kinda sad and lonely, still a flirt and a rapscallion but considerably less, and sometimes he just wants to stay in bed instead of going out and getting into all kinds of trouble
- oh also! he’s self conscious about his freckles, and usually uses some kind of makeup to cover them up if hell brain is acting up/he’s causing trouble
TENJIN
- i’ll be honest i do not remember if i still have their picrew
- i do nvm
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- this is tenjin! iirc they’re a drow enchanter (homebrew class my cousin made) but ig in a legal game they’d be a divination wizard
- he’s such a sweetie, oml
- fun fact he has autism! mostly nonverbal and gets overwhelmed super easily, and has a whole pouch full of trinkets that they fidget and stim with
- baby. baby boy
- really fun to play actually
BEE
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- she’s here to kick names and take ass, and she’s all out of names
- a whole lesbian. most of why she does what she does is to protect pretty girls
- human (shocker, i know) cleric of a storm god that i forgot to write down
- anyway!
- do no harm but take no shit is her motto. her methods may be borderline illegal, but hey, as long as the thing gets done it’s fine
- usually.
- basically her only method is swing a bat around until people talk and if the bat hits anything/anyone, well. that’s not her business
- oh yeah her bat. it’s infused with electricity and deals lightning damage as well as bludgeoning. it’s sick as hell
- she’s pretty rad
RAY
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- everyone needs a weed druid
- okay but seriously. they eat every plant they come across to 1) figure out what they do (they have insanely high con dw) and 2) for magical power
- are they high most of the time? yes. are they really sad actually? also yes
- they aren’t religious, but they do worship the deity their childhood best friend (turned lover, yes) worshipped
- i might talk about that more later :)
- anyway they’re super chill and also one of the few drows i have, iirc
WALKER
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- okay now we’re starting to catch up
- his name isn’t actually walker, but it’s what everyone calls him so that’s what he goes by
- he/they (wow theres a lot of he/theys huh) fallen aasimar gloom stalker ranger
- basically think of the edgiest anime boy you can imagine and go “what if he went to therapy”
- he’s such a good boy! yes they still do the adventuring thing, but make a point of going to therapy every week
- they’re making some great progress :)
- while he’s basically a witcher and gets treated like one (i.e. poorly), he just wants to settle down somewhere quiet when there’s no more evil in the world to grow vegetables where the only one around to judge him for being mute is his crow
- the picrew didn’t have a crow so please pretend that’s what the pigeon is
VAL
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- valor is a tiefling fighter who came into existence bc i rewatched netflix castlevania and was super gay for striga so i made a character inspired by her
- also has autism, but in addition, she has ptsd from her days in the royal army. she’s seen some shit yall
- isn’t very good with social interactions, a lot of stuff goes right over her head and she’s just awkward as hell, but get her talking about her special interest (military tactics) and she will talk for hours. please let her
- fun fact she met her wife bc she was fishing in a bog trying to catch dinner and fished out a wholeass lady instead
- she’s buff as hell. she could use literally anything as a weapon and make it hurt
UNNAMED WIZARD
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- i don’t have a name for them yet BUT i do know that they’re a bitch
- yet another he/they, this time we have a neutral evil wizard who doesn’t care who gets hurt as long as they get results for their experiments
- think albedo genshinimpact but with almost no morals
- yes he’d cast ninth level spells on his party if he was researching something. no he would not feel remorse. probably
- idk i haven’t fleshed him out yet i just know that he’s a bitch
MOUSE
- finally! my favorite character on this list
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- this is maisy, but she’s so tiny that everyone calls her mouse
- when i say tiny i mean she’s a halfling and also seven years old. she’s fucking little
- little human druid girl who basically raised herself in the forest and can & will make friends with literally any animal she comes across
- her arcane focus is her flower crown, which also has berries growing on it. they grow back every time she picks one to give to her friends :)
- she’s so fucking pure oh my god. actual cinnamon roll and everything that’s good in this world
- her rat’s name is rat. he’s her friend :)
- and also dog sized compared to her it’s hilarious. she has a little leash for him made of vines and particularly spry twigs
- have some bonus art bc oh my god cutie
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