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spatialwave · 29 days

Note

i am LOVING your angus tully content 💕 would you please write an angus tully x reader where the reader meets angus in boston while they’re ice skating and then they get to know each other as they explore the city, sort of ‘before sunrise’ style and hunham gives them the space to do so? if you don’t like this idea though that’s totally okay!! have a lovely day regardless :)

𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐫

pairing: angus tully x fem!reader word count: 4k notes: reader is very nervous & dorky! thank u for sending 🤎

the chilly december air stung your cheeks, leaving them reddened and sore, but that didn’t stop you from braving the weather and heading to the public skating rink. your friends had cancelled on you last minute, one of them falling sick with a nasty cold and the other deciding that her boyfriend was more important than a night with you during the festivities that boston had to offer. you couldn't be angry at her, though, you were a hopeless romantic at heart and would do the same if you had a boyfriend. you were happy that your best friend found someone so perfect for her, you dreamed of finding him too—the perfect boy.

though, you usually just giggled in your bed at night when you imagined yourself spending the rest of your life with david cassidy. that was much easier than finding real love.

so, alone you were as you willed your way ahead through the boston streets where your father had dropped you off. you promised yourself you'd start getting out of your nervous shell and what better way to test it than being alone at a skating rink? especially when you were notoriously clumsy and horrendous at skating.

if you could do this, you could do anything.

as you approached the skating rink you felt an overwhelming sense of anxiety flooding you. there were a lot of people, too many people, a lot of friends giggling with each other, children learning how to skate with their parents and partners holding hands as they stared into each other's eyes lovingly. you sorely missed your friends, but you shoved that thought as deeply into your consciousness as you could because you promised yourself you wouldn't wallow in your loneliness.

and you were here, weren’t you? successfully making do without them. all you needed to do was get the skates on and make your way onto the ice—that’s all. getting here was half the battle.

comfort warmed you as you fit yourself into the hand-me-down skates your older sister had given you. you tried so hard not to think about the negatives because even if you slipped and fell, it’s not like anyone here knew you. there was not a single person on the rink that looked even the slightest bit familiar and you thanked god you lived in a busy city.

of course, you were unsuccessful in ridding those thoughts because all you could think about was that there was a likely chance you could embarrass yourself in front of a cute boy. you were too boy-crazy for your own good, your mother blamed david cassidy for it.

as you let out a shaky exhale, you darted your eyes around the exterior of the rink as you shrugged off your bag and held your winter boots in your hand. you had ran into your first problem of the evening; there was no one to watch your belongings.

that’s when you noticed an older man just to the left of you, smoking out of a pipe and watching the rink, smiling to himself. he seemed friendly enough, reminding you a lot of your grandpa. there was no better person to watch your things!

“excuse me sir,” you said to him, smiling as you approached him cautiously, “is it alright if i leave my things here next to you? i’m not skating for long… i just don’t want to take them onto the rink with me.”

the man hadn’t realized you were talking to him at first as he pulled the pipe out of his mouth and looked between you and someone on the skating rink. he smacked his lips together a few times in thought, “okay. sure, i don’t mind.” he mumbled, though you could tell that he minded.

he was grumpier than you pegged him to be.

“thank you so much! i won’t be long!” you smiled, happy that you had some form of success, but again you had to ward off the image in your head of him running off with your things. at least he’d only have stolen a woman’s snow boots and three dollars from your wallet.

as you waddled away, you hadn’t noticed that a boy on the rink had skated up to the older man, you were much too focused on not toppling over. your ankles were already wobbling back and forth as you navigated through the snow, unaware of the set of eyes that lingered on you with each step you took.

“you got this,” you breathed to yourself as you made it to the entrance, taking a long and deep breath that caught in your throat. you froze in your spot, feeling frigid as you watched the tens of people skating along the rink so seemingly expert in their ways.

a woman cleared her throat behind you and you jolted up, looking over your shoulder and seeing a mother and her two children waiting to step into the rink, “sorry!” you squealed as you hurried onto the ice and clung to the railing for dear life.

the sounds of the young kids snickering made your cheeks burn red, so you kept your eyes downward and stared at your mitten-covered hands as they gripped onto the rail. then you focused on your feet, slowly moving them back and forth on the ice as you got used to the feeling of the skates gliding across the frozen surface.

with a triumphant huff, you straightened up and slowly started to skate with your hand keeping balance on the edge, much like a learning child. at least they usually had a helper.

you had focused on this for a bit, getting into the swing of things. you looked around with a content smile, slowly moving and breathing in the crisp air as you focused on the sounds of laughter. the christmas spirit was high and you were happier than ever to be experiencing this alone, you couldn’t wait to go home and gush to your sister about your first solo adventure as a young woman.

satisfaction wasn’t fully met, however. you needed to challenge yourself further before calling it a night.

carefully, you let your hand off of the rail and moved carefully away from the edge. your eyes darted around your immediate surroundings, making sure you had enough of a clearing to start skating without bumping into anyone. a big smile grew on your face, you were by no means quick, but at least you were moving!

you focused your eyes back down on your feet, watching closely as you moved one in front of the other with intention. you were getting the hang of it, muscle memory coming back from when you skated as a kid. with your attention far from the outside world, you didn’t notice a duo of young girls coming right for you—too busy laughing amongst each other to notice you drifting in front of them.

one of the girls bumped hard into your shoulder and yelped out a sincere ‘sorry’ as you lost your balance on your feet. you almost kept yourself upright, but you quickly fell back.

you expected to crash down onto the ice with a hard thump, but two arms caught you, hooking underneath your armpits and hoisting you back upright onto your skates. you didn’t have the means to turn around all that quickly, but the person who saved you seemed to realize that, so he skated in front of you and turned to look at you. he made it seem so easy to skate backward.

“you okay?” he asked, but you hardly heard the words because you were so fascinated with how beautiful he was. he had the biggest brown eyes you’d ever seen and a head full of wild curls that he obviously tried to tame. he was also taller than you, making you feel so small under his gaze, but not threatening in the slightest. all you could do was smile at him like a dork.

your knight in shining armour.

a few moments pass and the realization hit that you had been completely silent, “thank you!” you blurted out, your eyes widening in horror because of how you were staring at him like a goddamned fool, "i'm not very good at this."

"you were doing fine until you got bulldozed over," the boy smiled, unabashedly looking you up and down. he cleared his throat and held out two of his gloved hands, "hang on."

you obeyed with no hesitation, your arms extending so you could take his gloved hands in your own. you felt your mouth go dry and you had to force your hands to stop shaking. you were always so much more anxious around boys.

"oh, god," you groaned in anticipation as he started skating backward, pulling you along and forcing you to focus on keeping balance, "you really don't have to spend your time here teaching me how to skate." you looked up at him, feeling like a burden.

"i know," he replied, grinning at you as he kept pulling you along the ice, his gaze only breaking to make sure he wasn't about to skate back into anyone. those brown eyes fell back on you, watching you with a soft gaze as you kept moving with one foot gliding in front of the other, "i'm angus."

"hi, angus," you smiled, chewing on the inside of your lip after you returned the introduction. you could feel your cheeks blushing. you looked down and at your feet again, but your lack of focus got the best of you, "ah, shit!"

just as you lost your footing and balance, nearly flying forward, angus wrapped an arm around you and laughed aloud, pulling you against him so you couldn't tip over. you could've stayed like that forever, nuzzled against this boy's chest and forgetting about the outside world.

"you're clumsy," he teased, flickering his gaze down at you as he led you both to the railing for a rest.

"you only just noticed?" you retorted playfully as you leaned against the support, letting yourself exhale in relief once you could rest the entirety of your weight against it. shyly, you looked back over to angus after a few beats of silence, "you're not here with anyone else?"

angus scrunched his nose in response, shrugging, "it's a long story."

"i like stories," you mused, not ready to let this end. whatever this was.

a breathy laugh came from him as he glanced away to look at something, you hadn't been able to follow his gaze before he was looking at you again. there was something about him that kept your attention, likely the fact that he genuinely seemed to enjoy your presence. it made you giddy and your stomach swirled with butterflies.

"well, i came here with my history teacher," he said, almost sheepishly. you looked at him with slightly furrowed brows, uncertain where this would be going, "i go to a boarding school out of town, north of here. i, uh, didn't get to spend christmas with my family and so i've been stuck at school with him as my chaperone. guess i'm good at convincing people to take me places," he chuckled, his gaze looking anywhere but at you.

"i don't think i would've guessed that story in a million years," you giggled, a smile reaching your eyes as you looked over angus' face, "sorry about your family, though. must be hard around the holidays."

"it's fine," he quipped quickly, you figured it best to not bring up his family anymore.

you fell silent for a bit, thinning your lips as you looked around and focused on your surroundings to pass the time and try to ignore the awkward silence. you watched a group of kids skating together, playfully shoving each other and laughing when one of them wiped out.

"did you want to skate again?" angus' voice broke the silence and you met his eyes. with a small nod, he smiled and gave you his hands again.

the two of you had spent another twenty minutes on the skating rink, laughing together as he taught you how to keep yourself upright. you were happy to report that you'd only fallen on your ass twice, and even when he laughed at you, you felt your heart soaring.

there must've been some good karma you stored up over the year because you weren't sure why you were blessed to run into angus on a night like this. he was cute, funny and just as awkward as you were.

once you two were tired and ready to hang the skates up, you ventured out of the rink and stood at the exit. you had to catch your breath after laughing over some joke angus had made about his time at barton, something stupid that wouldn't have made you laugh in another other situation. angus was just... nice. funny, but in an endearingly dorky way.

as you bent down to untie your skates, you straightened up with a panicked look on your face. "my stuff!" you said, looking up at angus and then around the exterior of the rink, trying to spot the man you'd left your things with. that's where the bad karma came in, leaving you with nothing.

"are you looking for these?" a third voice spoke, your eyes landing on the pipe-smoking man that angus seemed to recognize. you put the pieces together.

"yes! thank you so much!" you smiled as you took the boots from him and your bag, quickly changing into the shoes that allowed you to stand steady. you sighed softly with a smile and looked between the two men, "i, uh, thank you again, sir, for keeping an eye on my things. and thanks, angus, i'm sure by next winter i'll be an olympic figure skater," you smiled, not quite ready to leave without spending more time with the boy, but you weren't sure you'd have the choice.

as luck would have it, though, his teacher, mr. hunham, seemed to have a soft spot for the boy.

"mr. tully, i'm calling it an evening and will be heading to the hotel room, i'm rather tired this evening," the older man explained. you could see the pleading look on angus's face, "i expect to see you there within a few hours or lest you deal with multiple detentions when we're back at barton," he continued with a satisfied look on his face when angus smile, "keep an eye on him for me." he turned to you, letting out a huffy sigh as he looked between the two of you once more before turning on his heels and leaving.

angus was speechless.

"he seems like a nice man," you said in awe as you watched him, growing nervous for other reasons now.

"trust me. he's usually not," angus replied, his hands shoved into the pockets of his coat as he looked down at you, "you look cold. i think i saw i coffee shop near here. they probably have hot chocolate or something."

"okay," you smiled, forcing yourself not to let your boy-crazy giddiness get the best of you again.

as you two ventured away from the skating rink, you found yourself feeling more comfortable with each passing second and talking about yourself like an open book. you spoke about everything and nothing, his favourite band was pink floyd and he was currently halfway through reading the novel dune. you shared your own love for the partridge family show, though, you kept your lips tight about your obsession with david cassidy.

you made a mental note to rip the poster of david off your wall if something were to ever come out of this night with you and angus, like hell he'd ever be in your room.

"what do you like so much about boston?" you asked angus as you two walked through one of the downtown streets in boston, your mittens shoved in your pocket as your hands cupped around the hot chocolate you sipped on. the heat emanated from the paper cup and warmed your hands. you two had been walking and talking for a while now and your drink was half-empty.

"you like long-winded answers, don't you?" angus said playfully, bumping himself against your side as you walked together. it caused a laugh to bubble up from you, your cheeks turning red at the closeness.

"what's so long about this answer?" you wondered aloud, glancing up at him.

"my dad is here," he said after taking a moment to think over his words, "he's uh, in the sanitorium," he murmured, not quite meeting your gaze, "not doing well mentally."

"you don't have to say anymore," you urged him, regretful that you asked the question in the first place.

"it's fine, i like you. you're not... judging me." angus admitted, flickering his eyes to you and smiling.

oh, god. that smile made your stomach do flips.

"why would i judge you?" you asked rhetorically, "you've been nothing but kind to me tonight. you didn't even know me and you caught me before i fell on my ass, i mean, that's the most any guy has ever done for me... and you bought me hot chocolate!" you were animated in your words as you spoke, not noticing how you lit up angus' facial expressions.

"like i said, it's because i like you." his lips twitched into a smile before he lifted his cup and downed the rest of his drink. you followed in suit, though, mostly to cover the way you had a smile stuck on your face like a lovesick puppy.

you two found an outdoor garbage bin and tossed your empty cups in, standing on a corner of the street that was near the courtyard with the skating rink. it was quiet there now, only then noticing how late it had gotten.

"so, what's your story?" angus interrupted your thoughts as he kept walking, you needing to take a few quick steps to meet his pace as he led you to a bench to sit down on. the perfect spot to watch the christmas lights flicker around the rink and people watch the last remaining people who were skating.

"it's hardly a story," you laughed, fidgeting with your fingers as you looked up to the night sky, the stars hidden because of the city lights, "i'm just crawling my way to graduation so i can get out of my parent's house and go to college," you look over at him, "are you graduating, too?"

he shook his head, "i was expelled a few times," he admitted with an amused look on his face, "should be graduating, but stuck as a junior because of my atrocious behaviour," he teased with a click of his tongue.

"expelled?" you laughed, "wow, i didn't expect such a gentleman like you to be so fond of troublemaking."

that got a laugh out of him, the smile reaching his eyes as he turned ever-so-slightly to better look at you while you two sat together, "yep, i'm the absolute worst. though, i plead my case as i've been wrongly accused of blowing up a toilet once when it was obviously not true."

"uh-huh," you smirked, "are you certain about the wrongly accused part?" you snorted a laugh.

the night was perfect. the two of you sharing so many laughs that your cheeks were hurting and you were beginning to feel like you knew angus for years and this was simply a reunion of friends. you knew at some point it would end, but you didn't want to think about it. not yet, it was too painful of a thought.

your laughter settled and you couldn't break your gaze from angus, the silence looming, but not overwhelming. as you admired him, you caught the way his brown eyes flickered down to your lips and you inhaled sharply, the breath catching.

"i, uh—can i kiss you?" his words were gentle, but they rang through your ears loudly, causing chaos and mayhem that left you feeling like a nervous wreck, "unless i'm reading this wrong."

you parted your lips to speak but nothing came out. all you could do was look down at his lips and nod, hoping that your movements spoke volumes. thankfully, they did.

angus leaned forward, hesitating for a second, but if you could will your way forward to adventuring boston alone, then you could sure as hell will your way forward to meet him halfway. you leaned forward bravely and closed your eyes just as your lips met his, a tingling sensation rolling waves over your skin.

it was a simple kiss, one that made your lips numb when you pulled away and looked up into his eyes. but it wasn’t enough for angus because you were soon pulled into another as his hand lifted and cupped your jaw, keeping you against him as your lips moved together at a gentle, easy pace. he parted your lips with his own, which gave him the space to slip his tongue into your mouth and cause a soft sound to escape your lips. you were fully entranced by him, completely malleable under his touch as you tasted his tongue on your own—sweet like chocolate.

this went on for a few minutes, maybe longer. you two indulging in the kiss you both were anticipating the moment you set eyes on each other.

“this sucks,” you murmured when the kiss finally broke, you two parting to breathe.

“why?” angus furrowed his brows slightly, his hand still on your jaw.

“because i really like you,” you said, pursing your lips into a pout, “and at some point i’m going to have to say goodbye.”

angus shared the sentiment, frowning slightly, “i’ll come to boston again, okay?” he said, just as passionate about you as you were to him, “and if you give me your number i promise to call you.”

you nodded, sighing and watching the way your warm breath fogged up in the cold air. the city was so silent and you’d never been able to experience it quite like this, let alone with a boy you kissed. knowing that it was getting late, though, left you nervous. you had told your parents you wouldn’t be out long and would go to your sister's apartment downtown for a ride back home—leave it up to a boy like angus tully to make it fun to break the rules.

“when do you go back to barton?” you asked him quietly like you didn’t want to hear the answer.

“the day after tomorrow,” angus murmured, his thumb stroking along the skin over your cheek, “i’m gonna’ try visit my dad tomorrow,” he said, “that’s the whole reason i convinced mr. hunham to bring me here, he doesn’t even know.”

you widened your eyes in surprise, “do you think he’ll let you go?”

“probably not, but i’ll find a way.” he said, but not quite fully convinced.

“it’ll work out, angus,” you said, a shiver running up his spine as you said his name, “just like you and me. i’m sure we’ll see each other again.”

he was glad that you managed to see the bright side in all of this, as the night was coming to an end he was beginning to let his negative thoughts pull through. already he could tell that you were going to be a big part of his life, even if it ended up being fleeting and short.

“come on,” angus breathed out, removing his hand from your cheek and standing up. he offered his hand for you to take.

“where are we going?” you asked him, blinking a few times as you took his hand, no mittens or gloves in the way as his fingers interlaced with yours.

“nowhere in particular,” he said, keeping you close as you walked through the quiet boston streets in the early morning hours and spending the last bit of freedom together that you two could muster.

when all was said and done, you found yourself exhausted as you curled up in your bed with the first bit of sunrise spilling through your curtains. it was a bittersweet end to your night with angus, leaving you uncertain about what the future would hold. all you knew was that you’d be waiting for that phone call he promised you.

and taking down your poster of david cassidy.

#angus tully #angus tully x reader #the holdovers #dominic sessa #angus tully fic #the holdovers fic #wordsbyspatial #spatialanswers

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spatialwave · 24 days

Text

𝐝𝐚𝐳𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝. 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐧𝐞.

“𝐀𝐈𝐑 𝐑𝐀𝐈𝐃”

pairing: angus tully x fem!reader word count: 8.9k summary: school is out and you’re looking to make the best out of your time while stuck in a small town. with summer in the air, you find yourself wrapped in a whirlwind of a day full of rookie hazing, warm beer and a budding romance with a certain football quarterback. warnings: underage drug use, bullying, name-calling, cheating. notes: not beta'd, so bare with me on any grammatical errors. also apologies for the wall of text LOL.

(a03 vers)

chapter two. ->

Moving to a small Texan town during Christmas of 1975 was far from ideal, especially as a high school junior. You’d left so much behind in California, your best friends, your boyfriend (who broke up with you because of the distance) and your part-time job as a beach lifeguard on the weekends. Maybe it was shallow, but you had the perfect life! A life that every girl your age dreamed of because you got away with whatever you wanted.

You weren’t queen bee, but you were well-liked and adored by many at your previous school, and being a popular girl at a large Californian high school was basically like being the Queen of England.

Your royal kingdom came crumbling down the day your parents, the banes of your existence, decided to move out to the Texan town where your mother was born and raised–before she escaped to the beautiful West Coast. You’d only been there twice in your life to visit your grandparents, but after your grandfather passed and left your grandmother to live the rest of her days alone… well, your parents couldn’t let her go off to a retirement home all by her lonesome.

They were too compassionate to let that happen.

Your father, a pediatrician, was happily welcomed into the small town where the number of citizens far outweighed the amount of healthcare workers. Your mother, a stay-at-home wife, took care of your grandmother during the days, kept the house clean from top-to-bottom and fed every mouth that came in the door.

There was very little you could complain about because you had all the essentials that every human needs—a roof over your head, food and clothes—and although you missed indulging in what the gorgeous city of Santa Barbara had to offer, you were far from a pouty and ungrateful person. You were a teenage girl, full of emotions and dramatics, so that’s why you spent a lot of your time complaining about it. It was valid to miss the lifestyle you had gotten used to and the worst part was that it took you at least two weeks to get over your lousy boyfriend who told you that it would take too much effort calling you and sending letters.

Goodbye, loser!

On your first day at Lee High School, you had so many unknown eyes on you that you were beginning to think that your days of being atop the social ladder were gone, leaving you at the bottom begging for scraps just to get up a peg. You were met with the opposite—a pretty girl from California like you turned heads for all the right reasons, and you found yourself being swarmed by peers wanting to get to know you. Particularly by two girls in your year, Kaye and Shavonne, who you’d clicked with like Dorothy’s heels on The Wizard of Oz.

So long to your Californian friends, and hello to your new Texan best friends, who were nothing short of young partiers who favoured cigarettes, beers and driving around late at night because there was fuck-all to do. They were the two realest girls you ever met.

It was an abrupt change of lifestyle, and while it was nerve-wracking at first, you’d welcomed it because you could focus less on how others perceived you and more on enjoying the good times. You learned to enjoy the taste of cheap beer, how to hustle people while playing pool, and the best places to park your car for a well-hidden make out session. By May, you’d smoked enough reefer that you could indulge in a couple of joints without spending the entirety of your evening with a bucket and your friends holding back your hair while they try to stifle laughs.

The only downside to the move? Two girls who you could never tell if they hated you, liked you or were jealous of you—Elise Crane and Darla Marks. Elise was a kind girl, at least on the surface, but Darla was a monster who wanted nothing more than to be envied by others. Shavonne was close with them, the type of girl to jump between the friend groups and report on each other. You came into the picture late, so you couldn’t complain about her two-sided nature to her face, but you did with Kaye.

You did your best to keep your lips tight on speaking badly around them when Shavonne was around, but calling Darla a bitch slipped the tongue once, and you could see the way your blonde friend’s eyes sparkled. It was only time until Darla called you out about saying she was a bitch behind her back.

That was the supposed life of growing up in a small town, you couldn’t say a goddamned thing to even your closest friends without everyone knowing eventually. Gossiping was healthier than ever, and you found that out, especially when you told Shavonne you thought a boy was cute.

Angus Tully.

He was the dreamiest boy you’d ever seen, well, the dreamiest boy in Texas. He was tall and lanky, a bit lean under the clothes from what you’d seen, with wild brown curls that grew around his ears and brown eyes that you could spend hours getting lost in. It was so cliché, but he gave you butterflies, and you felt like the luckiest girl alive being in the same social circle as him.

Over a few weeks of admiring him from afar, you saw that he was one of the few genuinely nice boys at school, nicer than Jason Smith and hundreds of times nicer than Teddy Kountze. He was like an angel compared to them, a boy who was friends with anyone and everyone and the type to check on the younger freshman who’d get tossed around by the seniors on the regular. Though, that didn’t stop him from being a conniving little shit with his friends when provoked–you’d seen firsthand their bad habit of driving around knocking mailboxes over when they got bored.

It was the culmination of everything of Angus Tully that drew you in. His charm, his uncaring attitude, and the fact that he enjoyed flirting with you when the chance arose.

Only issue? Elise Crane.

You knew nothing of their history as a ‘couple’, so you did your best to not let yourself get involved, or worse, between them. Shavonne, the gossip machine, told you everything you needed to know about their relationship—they were kind of together. You had no idea what that meant, but the fact that Angus had started spending more of his free time with you, you imagined that meant things were going south.

Elise Crane seemed so believably nice to you, but you couldn’t trust people who hung around Darla Marks. You sometimes kept Shavonne at arm’s length for that very reason. It didn’t take much to convince yourself to keep your nose out of other people’s business, especially when it revolved around teenage love—hell hath no fury like a jealous girlfriend.

Why did he have to be so cute, though?

You had been thinking this to yourself as you sat in class, mindlessly twirling a pencil in your fingers as you stared outside into the empty hallway. This was your second-last class, devastatingly close to freedom and the promised party at Pickford’s where you could get drunk, stoned and maybe find a boy to make out with. Maybe Benny—he was your usual go-to.

Normally, you were more active in conversation, but today you found yourself half-listening to everything happening around you. You’d heard Mike mention something about a pledge that the football players were asked to sign, though, you hadn’t really been paying much attention to what came with it. Pledge this, pledge that, you were hardly concerned with their issues.

As your eyes glazed over while you stared into the empty hall from your spot at the table, you saw two other football players, Jason and Benny, come to the doorway, beckoning Angus. Curious eyes watched as he got up from his seat and jogged out of class to go meet with them, and you perked up in your seat.

A small smirk played on your lips as you sat in anticipation, juggling the idea in your head until you slipped out of your seat and disappeared out of the classroom, looking to your right and seeing the boys walking down the hall together. Benny swung the paddle around as if hitting invisible freshmen, the trio chuckling to each other about god knows what.

“Hey, boys, wait up!” You called, arms crossing over the striped-cropped shirt you wore. You gazed amongst the three boys, Benny, Angus and Jason—they always looked like they were up to no good. They usually weren’t.

Benny’s eyes fixated on you, a boy you’d gotten to know decently well, but not through conversation. Instead of fixing on him, your eyes settled nicely onto the brunette who stood between them.

Lips thinned into a small smile for a moment before speaking again, “Too good for class?” you asked, looking between the boys with slightly narrowed eyes.

“No,” Jason said, cocking an eyebrow at you before smiling and confessing, “Yes.”

“Where are you going?” You asked curiously, nodding your head at Angus for him to answer.

“What is this? Are you going to lecture us about skipping class? Didn't realize you were a self-appointed hall monitor.” He retorted with a teasing look in his eyes, hands shoved into the pockets of his blue jeans as he took a step backward with a coy shrug, “Benny wants to head to the middle school, you know, see how the soon-to-be-freshman are holding up and give them a little announcement.”

“Well, that’s exactly what I came for,” you said, turning to Benny, meeting his eyes and feeling so small under it. He was a little intimidating.

“Anything you need,” He grinned, looking down at you like a piece of meat as he continued to swing the paddle.

You sighed, tapping your hand against the wood a couple of times to get his attention, “Do me a favour and don’t go too hard on my brother this summer, alright?” You plead, “he’s still getting used to the place and this is all new to him. He’s probably scared out of his mind.”

Benny’s eyes grew big at your statement, and he laughed loudly at the mere mention of going easy on the kid, “Don’t worry, I’ll give him a beating he’ll never forget!” He laughed with a loud slap of his hand against the paddle, causing the boys to laugh at his childish antics and you to roll your eyes in disgust.

“Fine, just don’t give him any more than you would the other kids, okay? Promise me,” you look between the boys, who all nodded in agreement.

“Sure,” Angus mused, tilting his head, “Your little brother will be okay, you got our word,” he reassured you, those brown eyes scanning over your body shamelessly and confidently. He always acted tougher around those boys.

You hadn’t believed a single word coming from any of them, but you still smiled up at Angus, because at least he was kind about it. Chewing on your bottom lip, you gave the boys a little nod before turning on your heel to head back to class—not before you felt a hard smack on your ass from the paddle.

“Ow—Benny!” You yelped loudly, jumping as you turned back to the three boys with an embarrassed smile on your lips, your hands rubbing over the stinging cheek that felt like fire under the fabric of your bell-bottoms.

“You liked it,” Benny said to you, offering a wink that made your stomach flip. You really needed to stop letting male attention get to you.

“Tell them to screw off!” Shavonne’s voice came from the classroom as her head peeked out of the door, her eyes landing on Jason before pulling away sharply. Your friend pulled you toward the girl’s bathroom before you could even say your goodbyes, meeting in the room to smoke a cigarette with Kaye and gossip before the next class. Though it wasn’t much gossiping, as Kaye decided to use the time to psychoanalyze Gilligan’s Island, and its link to the male gaze—she had some fair points, but Shavonne wasn’t convinced.

The final period of the day dragged on in History class, and you seated yourself at one of the desks near the back. Your head leaning back against the cool wall as you tried your best to relax, maybe even indulge in a nap to make time go by quicker. Although nearly successful, your attempts were cut short when you felt someone landing into the desk in front of you with a loud huff. Opening your eyes, they landed on the individual you’d been daydreaming about all day—a toothy grin on his lips.

“What are you doing here?” You asked as you stretched your arms up and sighed, nestling back into the seat afterwards.

“Oh, you know, figured I’d make an appearance,” Angus said to you, leaning forward so he could cross his arms and lean over your desk, “Did you miss me?”

“Yeah, right,” you snorted a laugh, lifting a hand to tuck back some stray hairs that fell into your face as you sat forward. You mimicked his position, leaning forward on your desk and resting your chin on your arms. It left your faces only a few inches apart, “How’d it go with Benny and Jason? Did you boys manage to scare the freshman into fleeing the country?”

“Totally,” he snickered, lip twitching as he dropped his gaze briefly, eyes looking over your lips then back up, “What’s up with you and Benny? He’s been complaining about you not wanting to see him lately, it’s all he talks about. It’s annoying.”

“Wow, that is totally none of your business,” you laughed through your breath and a flicker of amusement in your eyes, “Does this mean I allowed to ask what’s up with you and Elise?”

“Mm, touché,” Angus murmured, moving to sit up straight again, though his gaze not once wavering as he leaned against the metal bar behind him that connected the seat to the desk, “Do you actually care?”

“I’m allowed to be curious. It hasn’t killed me yet,” you remained in your position, eyes fluttering up to look the boy over, noticing the way his hair looked a little more unruly than most days. It was cute.

Angus chuckled, looking down at his hands for a moment, fidgeting with them as you saw him thinking over his next sentence carefully, avoiding word vomit. It was a tough topic, you figured that as much because if everything were fine then it would be an easy response. The truth can always be found in the reactions of others, a joyous day for a perceptive girl.

Those doe brown eyes met your gaze, “Things are… they’re okay.”

Your eyes soften in concern, “Just okay?”

“Let it go, alright? I’m trying to have a good last class of junior year,” he smiled at you, avoiding the topic as he bravely let one of his hands rest over your desk, so his fingers could play with the thin bracelet around your wrist, “Spending it with you makes it a pretty good last class.” He mused quietly, his voice a bit awkward.

Why did he always have to say shit like that? Shit that made you want to giggle and twirl your hair around your finger so you could appease him into saying more.

You hadn’t known Angus Tully for very long, but you often wondered where on earth his charisma had come from. He reminded you of a boy who would have a hard time talking to women, much like his friends Mike and Tony, yet here he was making your cheeks hurt with how much he made you smile. You chalked it up to him being a football player, even back in California you knew that any boy on the team was seen as the ‘Gods’ of school and their ego always got to their head—much like with you.

Cheeks shone crimson, and you attempted to remain chill, which wasn’t very chill at all. “Come on, Tully,” you chuckled nervously, “save that energy for graduation next year. No need to get sappy on me this early.”

That smile of his grew wider, his fingers not once pulling away from you as they continued to fiddle with the dainty chain, “What? You don’t like it?” He teased, knowing very well the reaction he was getting out of you.

“You’re so annoying, I hope you know that.” You beamed, the look on your face showcasing anything but annoyance.

The two of you were lucky that everyone else in the class was so preoccupied with themselves. If you kept this up, Elise would be waiting for you outside the classroom door with her fists balled up and ready to pick a fight. It was laughable imagery, neither you nor Elise would ever make for a good visual fight. One slap, and you’d both be crying back to your friends for soothing comfort.

“Did Benny get you this bracelet?” Angus’ lips curled at the corners, and you yanked your hand away with an irritated scoff, earning a proud laugh from the quarterback.

“What’s your obsession with Benny? If you’re jealous, that’s all you have to say,” You prodded in return, feeling your stomach do flips as you ventured into questionably flirtatious territory. The question caused Angus to crinkle his nose, not answering you. “What if he did get it for me?” You furthered, knowing very well the truth behind the jewellery—a gift from your Auntie on your sixteenth birthday.

Angus took another look at the bracelet, getting a good eye over it and causing you to shift uncomfortably in your seat. He took a few seconds to really admire it, looking over the multicoloured gems that tied into the golden chain, his thumb running along it and subsequently against your skin.

As you sat there, eyes fixated on the curly-haired boy, you delved deep into your mind and wondered what life would be like if you were able to call Angus your boyfriend. You knew of his sincere kindness toward his peers and inclination to stick it to the man, but was he a good partner? Would he be the type of boy to remember the date of when you started dating, or would he compliment you on your beauty when you’ve just woken up, hair wild and eyes small and tired? There was so much of him that you didn’t know, and you were desperate to figure it all out.

It made you wonder how on earth Elise didn’t appreciate him with all of her heart and soul. You would give anything to get a chance for it. A hopeless romantic, through and through.

“Benny couldn’t pull off this type of romance,” his voice pulled you back down from the clouds you had been dreaming in, calling you out on your bluff, “But let’s say he did… I want you to know that I could buy you a better one than this,” he replied with a self-satisfied look on his face, and like it was timed perfectly, the bell rang loudly in your ears as you stared at Angus with wide eyes and parted lips, breath caught in your throat, “Catch you later.”

You were the last student to leave the classroom, frozen in place out of pure shock over Angus’ words that flooded you with mixed signals. Flushed cheeks and a rapid heartbeat were a common occurrence when he was around, but things were different these past few weeks. The two of you had been finding yourself hanging out together more than usual, whether it was driving around or grabbing a bit to eat at Top Notch, you’d been freeing up a lot more evenings for him. There was an unspoken agreement to keep these meet-ups tight-lipped, considering you both wanted to keep your heads.

It was easy to get lost in the mixed signals that he threw at you, but you could almost swear that Angus had started behaving differently around you lately, less like just a friend. He acted similarly in which you act around boys that you crushed on, a bit flustered and awkward. You wanted so badly to call him out on it, but your guilt over hurting Elise won each time.

The last thing you needed before summer break was to read into it the wrong way and be pulled into that shit-show, so you shoved those thoughts deep from the gutters of your mind and hurried off—there were freshmen to haze, after all.

With Kaye driving the truck, you sat in the middle with Shavonne to your right. You’d just finished pulling off your top to replace it with the white jersey that displayed ‘SENIOR’ in big letters over the chest and ‘77 on the back. You thought it was corny, but you knew you’d be tucking it away in your drawer after the day’s end and keeping it as a memory to look back on fondly. Not too fondly, though, these were not going to be the best years you’ve ever lived.

“What’s up with you and Benny these days?” Shavonne questioned, smoking a cigarette with her window rolled down, flicking the ash as she turned to you.

“God, why does everyone keep asking me that?” You grumbled as you put your striped shirt down on the seat between you and Kaye, sitting forward so you could adjust the jersey over your body and tuck it into the high-waisted jean shorts you’d changed into.

“Everyone?” Kaye laughed, “You’re telling me there’s something else other than us who cares about you and Benny’s biweekly hook-ups? I have a hard time believing that.” She always thought your ‘relationship’ with Benny was laughable, naming him one of the biggest jerks of school. You wholeheartedly agreed that he was an asshole through and through, but he was at least kind to you—and you were both young and hormonal. It was basic math.

“Who is it?” Shavonne’s eyes lit up, once against seeing the gears turning in her head—your beloved friend, the rumour mill.

“Don’t you dare tell anyone,” you warned, “Angus was pestering me about it,” you shrugged as you stole the cigarette from where it rested snugly between two of her fingers. Taking a long drag, you exhaled, “Not sure why.”

“Don’t play dumb, you know exactly why,” Shavonne quipped in return, stealing back the half-smoked cigarette and holding it in her hand away from you.

“How does it feel to be so loved by the male gaze?” Kaye teased you, her eyes focusing ahead as the middle school came into view, “every boy wants you, and you keep egging them all on.”

“Firstly, I am not egging anyone on. Secondly, if you are trying to insinuate that something is going on between Angus and me, then you’re dead wrong,” you mumbled, lips twitching as you reached your hand forward and lowered the volume of the radio that had been blaring the Rolling Stones.

“All I’m saying is that I’ve known him for a lot longer than you have, alright?” Shavonne said as she flickered the cigarette out of the window, watching as it landed on the pavement, “Trust me when I say that boy likes you, I’ve never seen him so attached to anyone and that’s including Elise. I’m your friend,” she put a hand on your shoulder, “Why would I lie to you?”

Your eyes landed on Shavonne, quirking a humoured eyebrow, “Because you like getting reactions out of people.”

“You know me well,” she laughed, shoving you playfully as you pulled into the middle school parking lot, where you could see the other senior girls parked with their trucks and already wrangling girls in.

Most of the freshman girls stood by the fence, anxiously waiting to be picked one-by-one for the hazing rituals. Meanwhile, the freshman boys were running away from the school like it had been infested by the plague, nothing but fear in their eyes as they prayed for their asses to remain safe from the wrath of a senior with a paddle. You swore you could hear Teddy Kountze’s laugh from here, the poor bastard who flunked senior year and was back to paddle for another year. Embarrassing.

You then thought back to the promise Angus made with you and hoped that your brother had made it home safely.

Kaye parked the truck along the fence, and you followed the girls out, finding solace under the warm summer sun that was able to distract you from the craziness that was your mind. Focusing on the present, you reminded yourself to breathe slowly and evenly as you felt yourself falling out of place very quickly.

These rituals were new to you, you’ve experienced bullying first hand, both against you and toward others, but this was unknown territory, and you worried that someone would take things too far. Could this be considering bullying, and why did teachers condone it? For crying out loud, you were right in the parking lot of the middle school, watching the teachers leave as kids scattered like it was their last day on earth.

You’d gone up to Darla, offering a fake-sincere greeting as she gave you a handful of soothers, a way to infantilize the girls and embarrass them.

But as much as you wanted to hate this entire thing, you found yourself getting a bit too invested as you walked up to the young teens, beckoning them to you and pushing the soothers between their lips. It was interesting, you could see how a few of the girls were almost waiting in excitement to be included, while others were hoping you’d skip over them and let them go home. You figured the ones who were excited were the girls that would be climbing the social ladders much faster than the rest, being a pushover for the seniors was a sure-fire way to succeed.

After successfully gathering three girls into the truck, Kaye and Shavonne having grabbed two each, you saw an empty spot in the back of the truck waiting to be filled.

A soother, which was attached to a ribbon, was swung around by you playfully as you eyed up three girls that were leaning against the fence. You kept your feet planted on the cement, leaning against the open door on the truck bed, and looked over the girl in front, long brown curly hair and big, wide brown eyes.

She reminded you of Angus, more innocent—and a freshman girl, of course.

“Hey you… come here,” you said to her with a smile and a motioning hand, your energy toward her far from malicious, “Who are you?”

“I, uh,” the girl stuttered, clutching the textbooks against her chest tighter as she flickered her eyes from the girls in the truck to you, curiously stepping forward, “I’m nobody. I mean, I’m not in the truck.”

The girl was so endearing, you almost didn’t want to invite her for the sake of keeping her innocence, but you could tell she was interested. You sucked up your own worries and smiled.

“Well, are you a freshman?” You tilted your head, a sweet smile playing on your lips.

“Yeah.”

“Okay, are you in, or you out?”

There was a look of hesitation on the girl, her eyes flickering between the truck full of her peers and you, “I’m in.”

Once more, you were settled in between Shavonne and Kaye as you drove back to the high school with the brand-new freshman in tow. Life was feeling great again now that summer was here, the sun felt hotter than it did before school was out, everyone was smiling more—well, not the freshmen. The seniors, though, this was their last summer before they would be heading off into the real world.

This was the last summer you’d be blessed with pure teenage freedom, you weren’t going to let anyone get in the way of that. Not Benny, not Elise and as much as you wanted to say not Angus, you hoped that he’d weasel himself into your life over the course of the next three months. He’s the one person you’d let flip your world upside down if he was so willing.

As you watched the girls file out of the trucks and stand in a large group, with Darla in the centre, you began to feel nervous again. Stuffing soothers in their mouths was far from the worst thing that would be happening to them, so as you watched as she started screaming at them, you had to look away from second-hand embarrassment.

“All right, you little freshman bitches! Air raid!” Darla screamed as one of the other seniors blew into a whistle, commanding the girls to lay flat down on the hot pavement on their stomachs. You watched as the sea of freshmen dropped to the ground like their life depended on it, only for Darla to scream the opposite, “That was pitiful. On your feet,” they all scrambled up, “AIR RAID!”

It was like a skipping record, you felt sorry for the girls and sorrier for the one you’d dragged in at the very end. A miserable start to their high school experience.

You stood between Shavonne and Elise as you three watched over Darla, who was taking this far more seriously than anyone else. She reminded you a lot of Teddy Kountze in that aspect, ready to live and breathe for torturing the new meat.

“This is horrible,” you groaned as you looked amongst the girls with red faces. They were all tired and getting slower by the minute.

“I feel for them,” Elise spoke up, a smile on her face as her brown eyes looked over the girls who were starting to look worse for wear, “but we all had to go through this and one day they’ll be in our shoes doing the same thing. So, they have to pay for it.”

“That’s worse,” you shuddered quietly, hands shoved into your back pockets as you leaned your weight on one leg as your eyes scanned your surroundings.

There were other seniors parked around the ‘festivity’, either watching with grins on their faces, or looks of disgust. It was 50/50. You’d immediately noticed Angus sitting nearby on the back of Jason’s truck, nestled in between him and Slater, shades resting over the bridge of his nose and a big smile on his face as he watched Darla screaming at the girls.

He tilted his head forward, looking over his shades and in your direction. You glanced away, assuming that the look was meant for Elise, who lifted a dainty hand and waved in his direction. It was rare that you felt anger, but there was something about this moment that made you want to turn to her and throw her to the ground like a primal animal fighting for a mate. You desperately needed the party to start, so you could drink the night away and hopefully have your attention on someone else.

Just as you focused back on the girls, Darla’s voice marked a cue.

“Well, we tried to give you a chance,” she started, pursing her lips as she walked around the girls who were lying on their stomachs, “But because you little prick teases can’t follow instructions, we’re going to have to try something else,” she turned to you, Shavonne, Kaye and Elise, using her finger to beckon you all, “Come on, girls.” She said, licking over her teeth as she commanded the freshman to roll onto their backs.

“This is so bad,” you whined to Kaye as you walked to Darla’s truck and grabbed one of the bags of flour, holding it against your hip.

“Oh, come on, have a little fun. You’re throwing flour on ‘em, it’s not like you're bruising their asses until they can’t sit for weeks,” Shavonne jumped into the conversation as she grabbed a bottle of ketchup and mustard in her hands, “You’ve earned the right to be a bitchy senior, remember that.”

With a heavy exhale, you let your lips spread into a faux smile. As much as you were hesitant, you were still having fun, in some weird, twisted way.

You allowed yourself to enjoy this—as much as you could—giggling with your friends as you watched them squirt condiments on the girls who covered their faces with their hands. Likewise, you took handfuls of flour, sprinkling it over the freshman and adding in gentle words once in a while, “Welcome to high school,” you’d say with a smile, while carefully avoiding their faces as you packed the flour over them in heaps.

Once the girls were rightfully covered with food, oil and sauces, you all spread out and began showing off the girls to the surrounding boys that watched. Kaye had taken the new freshman over to Tony and Mike, smoking a cigarette and chatting with them as she egged the freshman on to ‘propose’. You’d watched how Tony spoke to her kindly, most of the boys finding the situation awkward.

So, you decided to suck up your hesitation once and for all and took one of the girls over to Jason, Angus and Slater. Maybe you were doing it solely so you could chat with the curly haired brunette again, but you were only human! Elise was too busy, anyway. It wasn’t illegal to talk.

“Okay, freshie,” you said as you walked up to them, your hands resting over the girl’s shoulders, “I want you to propose to Angus.”

Even behind the sunglasses, you could see him squint his eyes in embarrassment, having greatly preferred watching from the sidelines rather than being involved. You already knew he wouldn’t let this go so easily, but they were the ones who came to park and watch. They could’ve gone anywhere else but here.

“On your knees,” you said to the girl, voice far from stern.

“Christ,” Angus groaned, lifting a hand to push his shades back up over his hair, pushing the curls out of his face as he looked down at the young girl, then back up at you.

“Will you marry me?”

Angus sighed as he looked down, fighting off a smirk as Jason shoved him playfully with his shoulder, “C’mon, Tully, the poor thing wants to marry you, don’t leave the girl hanging. Imagine everything you could do to her—I mean with her.”

You kept a hand on the girl’s shoulder, hoping that Jason would shut his mouth.

“Fine,” Angus spoke, putting his hands on his thighs and sighing at the circumstance that he knew he couldn’t get out of, “What will you do for me?”

“Anything,” she answered, her voice as confident as she could muster, and you started to regret your actions when you saw Jason smile wide. He was usually a nice guy, but he wasn’t very smart and didn’t think before speaking—the sole reason Shavonne was always made at him. You also noted the empty beer bottle behind him, rolling your eyes.

“Open your mouth like this,” Jason said, opening his in an o-shape, which the girl followed. Angus groaned and turned his head away, stifling laughter, “Uh-huh, yeah. That’s a good one for the memory bank.”

“That is so degrading, man,” Slater said through a laugh that exposed how high he was, his red eyes hardly open as he looked over at Jason in a mixture of disgust and admiration.

The young girl immediately pulled herself up to her feet, cheeks red and looking up at you after Jason’s words. You wrapped an arm around her in comfort as you narrowed your eyes at the blonde boy, “You can be a real asshole, Jason,” you muttered at him, not even looking at Angus as you walked away. That was a mistake you’d be regretting for the rest of the evening.

“Don’t get mad at me, you brought her here!” Jason called after, the two beers in his system not doing wonders for his filter.

“Look at what you did you pervert,” Angus shoved at him playfully, putting his shades back over his eyes as he watched you walk away. Unbeknownst to you, he’d been thinking about you a lot too, more than you could comprehend.

“Those guys are jerks,” you had been telling the girl, “Watch out for boys like those, okay? You deserve someone who will treat you like the lady you are.”

The words were soothing, you could see it in her eyes, and you promised yourself that you’d stay far, far away from the senior’s celebrations next year.

Just as you had started herding the girls back into the truck, preparing to go through a car wash to clean the girls up in the most humiliating way ever, someone came running up behind you.

“What do you want?” You asked when the figure came into your peripheral vision, having assumed it was Jason coming back with an apology—that was wishful thinking. Lifting the truck bed up with a click, your eyes flickered to Angus, watching you through his shades and a smile on his lips.

“Ouch, didn’t realize you were mad at me,” he smirked, your eyes looking up and down at him with a quirked eyebrow. You noticed the puka shell necklace poking out from underneath his t-shirt—you’d given that to him as a gift just over a month ago. It made your cheeks warm.

“Sorry, thought you were Jason,” you admitted as you wiped your hands clear of flour on the denim that covered your hips. You glanced around, noticing that your truck was the last to leave, the other seniors pulling out of the lot as you two spoke, “I gotta’ get going. Duty calls.” You said, taking a few steps back.

“You should skip out, Kaye and Shavonne don’t need you to drive through a car wash,” he said, glancing up at the freshman that were sitting in the back and listening in because they had nothing better to do except wait for the next phase of hazing.

“I don’t know, Angus,” you sighed, placing your hands over your hips as you looked over to the side view mirror where you met Shavonne’s gaze. She motioned for you to go, your heart leaping in your chest, “Where are we going?”

“Slater wants to head over to Pickford’s place, you know, get some stuff and hang out for a bit.”

“You really want me there?”

“Well, I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t want you around,” he smiled, a hand reaching forward so he could hook his finger into one of your belt loops. That alone made you want to throw your arms around him then and there, forcing your lips together in a heavy kiss so he could taste your cherry chapstick.

“Yeah, whatever. Sounds cool,” you returned with a bashful smile, looking over at the freshmen as you smacked the side of the truck a few times to alert Kaye that they were ready. Both you and Angus waved the girls away, but you couldn’t keep your focus on anything except where his finger kept you tugged close to him.

“Man, I called shotgun before you,” Slater complained from the back seat in Angus’ car.

“It’s the shortest drive to Pickford’s,” you told the long-haired stoner, sitting sideways in your seat so you could look back at him.

“Yeah, but it all has to do with the morals of it,” he continued.

A laugh bubbled up, and you sat back in the passenger seat, looking out the open window and listening to the rock music playing from Angus’ radio, Aerosmith. You nodded your head along to the sound, one hand resting over where the window rolled down, the other on your thigh with fingers tapping along your skin. It was in moments like these you felt at peace, your hair blowing in the wind and a big smile on your face as the sun warmed you, hot enough that you could close your eyes and pretend you were on a coastal beach.

“You’re going to the party, right?” Angus asked, slowly your attention settling on him.

“Wouldn’t dream of missing it,” you smiled, the excitement buzzing inside of you.

“You going there with the girls?”

“No, I’m going with Benny,” you answered, lips spreading into a big grin when you saw the expression that fell over his face, “I’m kidding. God, you’re gullible.”

“You suck,” he rolled his eyes, reaching a hand to gently push at you. The same hand falling down so it could rest over your thigh—your bare thigh.

There was no willpower in you to push his hand away, to bring up Elise and say that if he wanted to act this way with you, he had to put an end to whatever was going on with them. The guilt would gnaw away at you later, for now you would allow yourself to enjoy the intimacy.

“What about you?” You asked, “who are you going with?”

“Just some of the football guys,” he replied, his thumb drawing circles over your thigh as he focused ahead on the road, “Why? Are you trying to go together?”

“You wish,” you laughed at his suggestion, “I’ll see you there. Maybe.”

Once at Pickford’s you lagged behind Slater and Angus, letting them talk with their parents as they packed away for what looked like a trip. That answered your question about how Pickford managed to pull off a big senior party at his house.

With your hands clasped in front of you, you smiled at the two older adults and kept your mouth tight–you’d never met them before, and you weren’t going to say anything to give them the wrong impression. They already seemed weary around Slater.

“Michelle is inside,” Pickford’s mother said to you with a sweet voice as she shoved some suitcases into the trunk of their vehicle, under the assumption you were there to meet with the only other girl there.

“Okay, yeah. Thanks.” you piped up, forcing a smile, unmoving until Angus wrapped an arm around your shoulder and tugged you toward the house.

“It was nice seeing you, have fun on your trip!” He called out to them once more, his charismatic nature taking the forefront, “Why are you being awkward with them?” he asked through a breathy chuckle, looking down at you as Slater led the way inside.

“I’m not awkward, I just like to make a good first impression,” you said, pulling away from his touch so you could shut the front door, “And what about you? You’re like… a chameleon.”

“What the hell does that mean?” Angus turned around to look at you with a raised eyebrow, paired with a curious smile.

You shrugged, walking past him as you followed Slater up the stairs, “You have this uncanny ability to blend into whatever social situation you want. It’s chameleon-like,” you explain, “Have you never noticed it before?”

“She’s totally right man,” Slater spoke from ahead of you, reaching the top of the stairs and turning around, “You know how to make friends with everybody and fit right in, you could totally be a CIA spy, man,” he spoke with his hands, eyes focusing on Angus as the two of you made up the stairs, “You’re not a spy are you?”

“Aw, shit, Slater,” Angus groaned, “You caught me. Guess I gotta’ assassinate you like they asked me to.” He abruptly fake punched Slater’s gut, making the stoner jump back.

“Not funny, man,” he said, causing you to laugh as you walked past him, “That’s, like, my worst fear.”

“Being assassinated?” You looked over your shoulder at Slater, giving him a look that screamed, ‘what the fuck?’.

“Yeah, exactly! Just like JFK, man. I’m driving around one day and BOOM, bullet right into my skull and killing me instantly.” He emphasized the word, pretending to shoot you with a fake sniper.

“Sorry to break it to you, Slate-man, but most stoner teens from small town America aren’t on any hit lists.” Angus said as he knocked on Pickford’s bedroom door, the boy needing to come up and unlock it for them all, “You don’t drive, either.”

“JFK wasn’t driving either, man, that’s some scary stuff.” Slater said, pointing a finger at him as he did.

“Be careful, Slater, if you think too hard about it, you might manifest it into reality,” you snickered as you followed Angus into Pickford’s bedroom.

“So, not funny.”

You’d all settled into the large bedroom room, with you sitting next to Angus on the bed and Slater on the floor just to your left. For the first few minutes, while Pickford had dug around in his stash, you talked with Michelle and looked at her in awe—to you, she was way cooler than Darla could ever be.

“Sample of the goods,” Pickford smiled as he sat in front of Michelle, the girl wrapping her legs and arms around him as he lit up the joint, passing it over to Slater, who was here for business.

The long-haired teen took a drag from the expertly-rolled joint, and you watched as he held the smoke in for a few seconds and narrowed his eyes. If there was anything that impressed you about Slater, it was the fact that the kid could be high 24/7 without getting sick from it. You were also sure that he could do a blind test and know what kind of strains he was smoking from memory.

“Fifteen bucks,” Pickford spoke up, handing the bag of loose flower to Slater, who then handed the joint to you.

With ease, you brought the end up to your lips and inhaled, the smoke moving deep into your lungs as you pulled away and exhaled. It wasn’t an instant high, but you could feel your shoulders relaxing as you passed it to Angus, his fingers brushing against yours.

“Hey man,” Slater leaned forward, looking between both of you, “Can you spot me a ten?”

Michelle and Pickford chuckled as both of you snapped your eyes at him, Angus humming in question as he hit the joint. “I’ll pay you, like, Tuesday and shit.” He said, smoking still coming out of his mouth, as he looked down at the five dollar bill he pulled out of his pocket.

“You owe me ten and a shake from Top Notch,” you told him as you pulled out a ten dollar bill from your pocket, a permanent smile on your face as you slipped the bill to Pickford.

“Thank you,” Slater grinned, “I’ll definitely get you a shake, man, one of this big chocolate ones, but we gotta’ share it, alright? Those are my favourite.”

“Deal,” you giggled, having not realized how you’d settled nicely against Angus’ side, his left arm wrapping around you with his hand placed over your hip.

As the five of you started chatting about the party plans and passed around the joint once more, leaving your eyes half-lidded and glossy, there was a knock on Pickford’s bedroom door. You smacked your lips a couple of times, feeling the dryness accumulate in your mouth and desperately wishing you had a big glass of water with you.

“Hide this,” Angus passed the joint to you, which made you realize the knock was coming from his parents. A bit panicked, you looked down at the joint in your hands, then passed onto Michelle as Pickford rushed up and began hiding his paraphernalia into the depths of his dresser drawers.

“Who is it?” Pickford called out, his mother answering and explaining that he’d best come out there.

The entire situation left you feeling paranoid, rubbing a hand over your eyes as if that would hide the redness—you’d left your purse with Visine in Kaye’s truck. Angus got up and helped Pickford, spraying some air freshener around the room as you all adjusted yourselves into different areas. Michelle moved to the window ledge, Slater leaned back into the rounded chair and once Angus was back to sitting on the bed, you found yourself laying back on him with his arms wrapped around your waist and hands clasped on your stomach.

“Kevin, open the door.” His father’s voice boomed, making you shudder.

“It’s okay,” Angus’ deep voice murmured into your ear, leaving you shivering and feeling nervous for an entirely different reason now.

You sighed shakily, doing your best to relax as Pickford opened the door, his father looking miserable and furious. Quickly, you flickered your gaze away and tried not to listen in on the conversation, turning your head enough so you could look up at Angus. Slowly, you lifted a hand up, so your fingers could play with a couple of the curls that hung over his ears. The two of you stayed like that, smiling at each other like you were in love and acting like nothing was out of the ordinary.

Pickford dealt with the situation, which had to do with the delivery driver bringing kegs of beer to his house much earlier than the teen had anticipated. He was playing it off as coolly as he could, but when you glanced over, his father looked like he was about to explode any second. You so wished you were sober right now.

You smacked your dry again as the teen left the room, looking up at his father, who hadn’t moved. He looked over everyone, hands on his hips, “You guys know anything about a party here tonight?” He asked, flaring his nostrils as he waited for someone to confess.

There was a collective ‘no’ amongst all of you, shrugging it off as if that was a preposterous idea. You all sighed in relief when he left, Slater especially as he pulled out the baggy of weed he’d hidden in his shirt and tossed it onto the round table in front of him.

“Pickford is so dead,” you said aloud, looking at everyone.

“Fucking delivery driver. Never in my life have I seen those bastards arrive early,” Angus replied, shifting behind you as you all tried to listen in to the sound of Pickford’s father trudging down the stairs.

“You think the party is a bust?” Slater asked, his gaze flickering to Michelle.

The girl let out a sigh as she looked out the window and saw her boyfriend coming back inside as the delivery driver start putting the kegs back in his truck. The front door slammed, echoing within the house as if confirming everyone’s worst fears, “yeah.”

As the car pulled away from Pickford's house, you settled into the backseat, eyes closed, feeling the wind from the open windows cool your skin. Angus and Slater talked over their plans for the evening, but all you could think about was the warmth of Angus's arms wrapped around you earlier. It made you feel comforted, safe, and strangely excited. You wanted to go back to that moment, to tilt your head back and look into his eyes again and note the small details on his face that you’d never paid attention to before. To touch his curls again, letting your fingers get caught as you pull him into a kiss—

"Am I taking you home?" Angus's voice broke through your thoughts, and you met his gaze in the rearview mirror.

"Yes, please," you replied softly, sitting forward and feeling like everything around you was moving slower than reality, "so what's up for tonight?"

"Don’t know yet," Angus said, turning onto your block, "we're going to meet up with Pickford and Michelle, figure things out now that his parents are staying back from the trip. You sure you don’t want to come along?"

You hesitated, chewing on your bottom lip. It was a tempting offer to spend more time with them, but you had other plans. "No, I'm good," you sighed, looking out onto the street as your house came into view, "Kaye is picking me up around eight, so I should go get ready. I’ll see you around, though?"

"Yeah, I'll be around," Angus replied with a smile that sent a shiver down your spine.

"Cool," you smiled back, reaching over to tousle his curls before sliding to the edge of the car. Slater jumped out to push the seat forward for you, and as you stepped out, you leaned forward against the door, looking through the open window.

"Bye, Angus," you said, a hint of playfulness in your voice, "See you later, Slater."

As you walked towards your house, you couldn't shake the excitement bubbling inside you. The night was full of possibilities, and you wondered what it would bring. But through the anticipation, a nagging thought lingered—the growing attraction between you and Angus.

Two sets of eyes watched as you walked to your house, disappearing through the front door.

“She’s so into you, man, I’ve never seen her act like that around Benny,” Slater spoke, nodding to himself as he glanced at Angus, “What are you gonna’ do?”

The teen sat there for a moment, thinking over the words as he shifted the car back into drive and sped down the street, hand gripping at the steering wheel as his mind filled with complications over the situation, “I don’t know.”

#angus tully #angus tully x reader #the holdovers #the holdovers au #dazed and confused #angus tully fic #the holdovers fic #dominic sessa #wordsbyspatial

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spatialwave · 1 month

Note

I can’t stop thinking about Angus with a childhood best friend!reader. (I imagine she would go to a different private school so they could only see each other over the summer and talk through letters and calls)

oh my god this is soooo good! you, my dear anon, have a beautiful mind. 🤍

𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐧𝐨 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝, 𝐧𝐨 𝐡𝐨𝐰.

notes: angus tully x fem!reader || 3.1k words || dividers by @cafekitsune

you and angus had been best friends since kindergarten, inseparable through hundreds of playdates from the ages of five to fifteen. you two were attached to the hip and anyone could see the bond that blossomed between the two of you. he was everything to you and you were everything to him.

you remember the first day you met, early november and a chilly day on the playground. you were bundled up with a big coat and mittens while poking and prodding at some flowers that were slowly dying—signalling the freezing weather that would arrive at any moment.

"my mom told me those kinds of flowers are weeds." a voice spoke from beside you, a boy your age with wildly, curly hair and big brown eyes. he wasn't looking at you, but at the wilting flower.

"pretty weeds," you murmured as your gaze turned back to the same flower.

"yup," he replied, the two of you kneeling there in silence as the school bell rang. neither of you moved until one of the teachers found you both and ushered you inside—you sat next to each other for the rest of the year; the history of your friendship.

angus was there when you were twelve years old and experienced your first adolescent heartbreak. a boy one year older who had kissed you and told you he loved you; then kissed one of your other so-called friends the same day with the same words. back then it shattered your entire being and angus was there to help you pick up the pieces and put your poor little heart back together until it was beating again.

and whenever he was feeling sad, which happened a lot after his dad was put in a sanitarium, you were there at his house with some popcorn and ready to watch whatever movie would air that evening. sometimes you two would listen to a record and simply exist together—being near each other made him feel better.

hell, he was even there when you got your first period when you were visiting his family. you remember how both of you started screaming when you told him you were bleeding, crying as you convinced yourself you were dying until his mom came to the rescue. she had to explain biology more thoroughly than your health teacher did, which only embarrassed you and made angus start asking a flurry of questions about it. from then on, once a month, he'd be there with whatever you needed; junk food, chocolate, and a hot water bottle.

your lives were so intertwined that you knew every little detail about each other. well, mostly. there was one moment that you kept from him in the vastness of your relationship, how his first kiss made you boil with jealousy.

you pushed that feeling far away and focused on the positives of your friendship as years passed and life slowly felt more and more complicated.

it was in your freshman year of high school when he first started acting out, even when you offered all the support you could muster up. he was kicked out of your school at fifteen, then another in the same year. the following year he almost made it the entire schooling term before he was finally sent off to a private boarding school—completely uprooted from the friendship you two had together.

that was your first real heartbreak.

his too.

angus beat himself up about it during the sleepless nights at barton, devastated that he couldn't even see you on weekends like he used to. knowing that you were in your senior year and he was lagging behind as a junior because of his expulsions. there was a drift happening in your friendship and it was because of him. all because he couldn't keep his emotions in check.

you couldn't blame him and you wouldn't, you made that apparent with the letters you sent him. making sure he never once felt alone in his struggles.

"𝙷𝚒 𝙰𝚗𝚐𝚞𝚜,

𝙸 𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚎 𝙱𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚘𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚎𝚕𝚕. 𝙼𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚂𝚌𝚘𝚝𝚝 𝚒𝚜 𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚊𝚜 𝚗𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚢 𝚊𝚜 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚍𝚎𝚌𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚜𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚛𝚞𝚒𝚗 𝚖𝚢 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚏𝚊𝚒𝚕 𝚖𝚎 𝚒𝚗 𝚑𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢. 𝙳𝚒𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚗 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝙿𝚎𝚕𝚘𝚙𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚒𝚊𝚗 𝚠𝚊𝚛 𝚢𝚎𝚝? 𝙸𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚎𝚡𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚗 𝚒𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚊 𝚌𝚛𝚞𝚜𝚝𝚢 𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚠𝚘𝚖𝚊𝚗 𝚌𝚊𝚗, 𝚒𝚝 𝚖𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚙 𝚖𝚎 𝚐𝚎𝚝 𝚊 𝙲+. 𝙸 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊 𝚕𝚘𝚝, 𝙸 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚛𝚎 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚂𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚝 𝙺𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚜 𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝙲𝚑𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚖𝚊𝚜 𝚋𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚔, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚎 𝚖𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚕𝚕 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚙 𝚊𝚝 𝚖𝚢 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚘𝚔𝚊𝚢?

𝙻𝚘𝚟𝚎, 𝚈/𝙽."

it was these letters that kept him afloat during those days in the week that made him want to give up and run away, or worse, get expelled and sent to fork union. he kept every single letter from you and hid them underneath his mattress. if kountze were to see them that would be the end of it, so he made sure to read them only when everyone was asleep—he always had the best dreams after.

"𝙷𝚒, 𝚈/𝙽,

𝙸 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚗'𝚝 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚎𝚍 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚢𝚎𝚝, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝙸 𝚍𝚒𝚍 𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚝𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚒𝚜 𝚌𝚛𝚞𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝙼𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚂𝚌𝚘𝚝𝚝, 𝚜𝚘 𝙸 𝚊𝚖 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝚒𝚏 𝚒𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚙. 𝙱𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚘𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝙾𝙺, 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚋𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚜𝚎, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚋𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚒𝚏 𝙸 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚋𝚎 𝚊𝚝 𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚘𝚘𝚕 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚐𝚊𝚒𝚗. 𝙸 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚎 𝙸 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚟𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞, 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚢𝚎𝚝 𝙸'𝚕𝚕 𝚋𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚂𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚝 𝙺𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚜. 𝙼𝚢 𝚖𝚘𝚖 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚕𝚎𝚢 𝚜𝚊𝚒𝚍 𝚠𝚎'𝚕𝚕 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚊 𝚏𝚎𝚠 𝚍𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚕𝚢 𝚜𝚘 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚋𝚎𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚝𝚘 𝙱𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚘𝚗, 𝙸'𝚖 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚟𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚊 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚙𝚕𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚍𝚊𝚢𝚜. 𝙸 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚘𝚘.

𝙻𝚘𝚟𝚎, 𝙰𝚗𝚐𝚞𝚜."

hearing from him always made your stomach flutter and left your heart aching deeply for him. it was melancholic, wishing more than he could be back by your side while trying to be content with a letter from your love... your love?

those feelings had been building up inside you for months—years.

it left you awake at night, wondering if angus felt the same or if you would remain nothing more than friends for the rest of your life. you couldn't be upset with the latter, angus was your best friend and you would never let yourself lose that.

yet, you yearned for him. for the possibility of something more. you dreamt of what it would be like to kiss him, but those thoughts diminished quickly because you felt guilty. you shouldn't have those feelings for a boy who's only your best friend.

a few weeks had passed and you hadn't written a letter back because school was hectic and the gloominess of winter had left you with little energy. you and angus could sometimes go weeks without hearing from each other, but it was never intentional. it wasn't until your first night home during the christmas holidays that you realized you'd never written him back. you had only started scribbling a letter when the phone rang.

"it's angus!" your mother called from the kitchen on the first floor. that's when you remembered the promise he made in your letters. he'd be visiting soon!

"coming!" you called back as you rushed down the stairs so fast your mother had chastised you for nearly running your little brother over. you pressed the phone against your ear, lips curved into a big smile as you caught your breath, "angus, when are yo—"

"i won't be visiting," his voice said quietly, a bit crackly through the phone and deeper than you remembered it being when you last spoke. your brows furrowed together at his words and you were filled with nothing short of confusion and disappointment, hand clutching tight the phone in your hand as your other absently fidgeted with the cord.

"what do you mean? you promised me you would, angus." you said to him, your voice sharper than you meant for it to sound, "is saint kitts really that much more important?"

silence.

"my mom and stanley are going without me," he replied and it was then you could hear in his voice that he was fighting back tears. his heart was broken and you weren't there to pick up the pieces. you filled with dread and guilt for your snappy words, feeling the aching of his heart in your own.

"what?" you questioned, leaning back against the wall and tilting your head up, eyes fixating on the ceiling where you could see a water spot forming from the old piping in your home.

"yeah, they decided now was the fucking time to take their honeymoon. can you believe that? they ditched me and went to saint kitts without me and left me at barton," he said, his voice growing angrier with each passing second, "the worst part is that i didn't care about saint kitts, i just needed to see you," his voice cracked again.

tears pricked at your eyes and your mom, who had been eavesdropping, had decided to let you have privacy in the kitchen as she escorted your brother to the playroom. you sniffled and wiped away the tears with the sleeve of your sweater, shaking your head in disbelief.

"i miss you so much, angus, it physically hurts," you whimpered into the phone and it was then you couldn't help but start crying. the sounds made his heart ache.

"i know, i'm so sorry."

the two of you were only on the phone for a few more minutes because angus had heard one of the other holdovers coming down the hall. you didn't question it, a school full of boys meant that crying around others was asking for a death wish.

when all you could was hear the dial tone, a quiet 'i love you' escaped your lips.

pathetic.

four days passed and tomorrow was christmas eve; you'd never felt so empty in your entire life. you hadn't heard from angus since your last phone call and it was like all joy and happiness had been sucked out of your soul. your mother, who often liked to call you dramatic, didn't dare say a peep.

you had been laying in bed all morning, doing nothing except falling back asleep or staring out your bedroom window and watching a soft flurry of snow falling. you promised yourself to write angus a letter today, but you weren't entirely sure that you would be able to without breaking down and sobbing. your eyes were already puffy from crying yourself to sleep, you couldn't risk them hurting anymore.

"sweetie?" the voice came with a knock on your door. your mother, her voice as sweet as cinnamon. you didn't answer as the door creaked open.

"i'd like for you to come for a drive with me, if that's alright."

"no."

"i'm not leaving until you come with me."

"fine."

you were bundled up in a big coat as you sat in the passenger seat of your mother's station wagon, your forehead pressed against the window as you watched the snowfall. you hadn't really been paying much attention to where you two were going or how long you'd been driving, figuring that sooner or later your mother would pipe up and ask about you. this was always her way of understanding your emotions, it always worked. you always managed to spill your guts to her while in the passenger seat.

"do you love him?" she asked quietly, her eyes flickering toward you.

"what?" you became defensive, sitting upright and glaring daggers at her, "no. i mean yeah. of course i love him he's my best friend. just... nothing more. nothing like that!"

"so you do." she smiled, admiring you as she focused her attention back ahead, fingers gently tapping against the steering wheel as she hummed softly, "i'm taking you to barton."

"what?!" you screeched, your heart pounding hard in your chest, "you're telling me that now? you should've let me get ready! god, he's going to think i'm a mess!" you grumbled as you pulled down the visor and looked into the mirror, trying desperately to make your hair behave and wipe away the tiredness from your eyes.

"he's not going to care what you look like, darling." your mother said with a sigh.

"okay, well i care what i look like!"

"stop being so dramatic."

—

on the way to barton, your mother told you what she had planned behind your back, she called the school and managed to speak with a lady named miss lamb and explained the situation. according to your mother she sounded very excited that you would be visiting angus—it was likely that he was being just as pouty and sad as you were, if not more.

it made you wonder how lonely he'd been. should you have called more?

your hands were shaking as you pulled up to the school, your entire body nearly vibrating as you stepped out of the car and did one more fix on your hair. you were excited to see him, but why were you nervous? you had never been nervous about seeing him, why was this different?

an older woman who you could only presume was miss lamb greeted you at the main entrance, ushering you in quickly. you sighed softly when the cold air was no longer nipping at your skin, but instead, you were filled with that familiar feeling of nervousness once again.

"i think angus is up in one of the classrooms right now. he's been hiding himself away since he's been here with just me and mr. hunham. the poor boy got left behind here while the other boys were able to go spend the holidays at a ski hill," she said, glancing at you a few times as you followed her, fidgeting with your hands nervously. you hadn't realized until now that your mother had stayed in the foyer. miss lamb spoke up again, disturbing your thoughts, "he mentioned you the other day at dinner. was complaining to us about his situation and how he was supposed to visit his best friend... you know, i expected you to be a boy."

"yeah," you murmur as you ascend a staircase, "people always say that. a girl and a boy could never be just friends."

"mhm, it's hard for people to think that when they know what young love looks like," she hummed, avoiding your piercing gaze as she led you through the halls, "angus!" she called out as you two reached a hallway on the second floor, "where are you?"

"what do you need, mary?" his voice echoed from the last classroom on the right, his voice whiny and pouty.

you hadn’t moved so fast in your life. your legs picked up speed and mary turned the other way, satisfied with what she'd seen so far. she wasn't going to impose on a special moment. this was the happiest she'd felt in a long time, too.

"angus!" you called out as you sprinted ahead, nearly missing the door as you made a full stop under the door frame. you watched him as he turned his gaze, eyes moving from the window he'd been peering out of and over at you. you were blessed with the sight of seeing his big brown eyes soften and how a weight eased on his shoulders. he was gorgeous, the most beautiful man in the world and you weren’t going to leave barton until he knew that.

"what the hell are you doing here?" he asked, blinking a few times, as though he was hallucinating and afraid you weren't real, "christ–get over here."

he met you halfway as you bolted toward him, arms outstretched and wrapping around his waist as you buried your face into his chest. “i missed you so fucking much,” you whimpered, fingers tightening into fists as they gripped the back of his jacket. he smelled nice, like the cheap cologne you bought him last christmas; musk, cedar & notes of vanilla.

his own arms were around your shoulders, his face nuzzling against the top of your head as you two relished in each other’s presence.

it had been months. months that felt like a millennium.

“i missed you too,” he whispered against your hair, arms tightening around you briefly before easing up, “you look so pretty.”

you tilted your head back to look at him, your eyes glossy from the tears that spilled down your cheeks. you had parted your lips to say something back as your cheeks reddened from his compliment, but he didn’t give you the chance—rightly shutting you up with his lips.

it was then you fully understood how much you loved angus tully, less as a friend and more as a partner. a soulmate.

your lips moved together in desperation and need, kissing each other like you were lovers that had been separated for years. one of his hands had moved up to the back of your hair, fingers tangling, while the other gripped at your hip. both of your arms snaked around he neck, pulling him down so you didn’t have to stand on the tips of your toes to meet his lips.

this lasted for awhile, stopping only when you two had ran out of breath and were panting together.

“i love you,” you said first, your forehead pressing against angus’ as you looked deep into his brown eyes, “i’ve loved you for a very long time... too long.”

“me too,” he murmured in returned, the hand that was on your hip now caressing your cheek, his thumb gently grazing over your soft skin, “you’re the only reason it’s lonely here. seriously, i think i’m going mad without you,” he laughed breathily, bumping his nose playfully against yours.

“then i’ll make sure you don’t have to go without me too long,” your voice was soft as you spoke, unable to rid yourself of the big smile that plastered your lips, “maybe we can convince your teacher to let me stay for a night… or maybe you can spend christmas with us.”

“i want to go to boston with you,” he said quick, like he’d been waiting to say it.

you knew exactly what he meant. you knew everything about boston—you knew who was waiting in boston.

“okay,” you murmured, “let’s go to boston.”

you couldn’t promise that it would actually happen, how on earth would a chaperone let their student travel miles away to a city without them? you didn’t care about that right now. all you cared about was making sure that angus knew he had your support. that’s how being best friends worked.

you were there for each other. you were always going to help pick up each other’s pieces.

“kiss me again, angus.”

#angus tully #angus tully x reader #dominic sessa #the holdovers #angus tully fic #the holdovers fic #wordsbyspatial #spatialanswers

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spatialwave · 30 days

Text

❝𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞?❞

notes: angus tully x fem!reader || college au word count: 2.2k warnings: slight nsfw, angst, arguing & name-calling

you loved angus tully. you loved him so goddamn much, but sometimes he made you want to rip your hair out and scream. the two of you were heading into your final year of university and had been dating since your second year. neither of you bit the bullet on moving in yet, but things were getting serious and you wanted to take that next step with him over the summer.

except you weren't sure if that was in his own plans. the moment you mentioned it, you felt him grow distant and cold. it was hard not to take it personally, to feel like you were taking things too fast.

was he not as interested as you? was he planning on breaking up with you? did he fall out of love with you?

these were the questions that haunted you day and night, even in those intimate moments when the two of you were hanging out at your apartment.

he was looking over a history textbook, face scrunched up as he scoured the pages as he hunched over your small kitchen table. you were sitting on the couch, a book in your hand with your eyes peering right over it and watching your boyfriend. he looked so cute when he was focused, his lips slightly pursed and fingers tapping along the wooden surface of your table.

he was so hard to be mad at, but it had been nearly three weeks since you brought up your... idea. three weeks of him distancing himself in the smallest of ways. choosing to study with his classmates or wanting to stay at his dorm over the weekend rather than with you.

you were usually a good communicator, but this worried you.

"you're staring," angus' voice broke the silence, you hadn't realized he'd been looking back at you.

your eyes narrowed further, the swarming of negative thoughts in your head keeping you on the brink of anger. it was easy to get like this when you were stressed, so looming finals were of no help.

keeping silent, you pulled your gaze onto the words on the page. however, the stepford wives was doing a horrible job at actually keeping you engaged. with a quick sigh, you snapped the book closed and your sharp gaze shifted back to your boyfriend.

god, you hated the way he was staring at you like he did nothing wrong–after weeks of feeling worried over the state of your relationship. your anger was palpable.

"did i do something wrong?" you asked, keeping cool on your tone of voice as you sat upright on the couch, soon moving to your feet. arms crossed over your chest and you kept your gaze firm.

"what?" he looked at you with a face of confusion, you could see his own guard coming up as he stood.

he overpowered you in height, but you weren't scared. you knew he would never intimidate you physically, but emotionally he was tearing you to pieces. whether he knew it or not. it wasn't your fault that you loved him with all your being.

"you've been distant for like a month now. this is the first time you've come to study at my place in over a week and you're not even sitting with me," you explained, one of your arms moving from your chest and animating your words as you spoke, "i feel like every chance you get you choose to be away from me. why?"

"listen, you're getting ahead of yourself," he warned, taking a step toward you.

"am i? it's a simple question, angus." you are steady in your voice, though, you can feel your hands beginning to shake.

"it's really not," he let out an exasperated laugh and it's that moment that sets you off. it's one of your worst flaws, when someone acts differently than your expectations it's enough to make you blow up.

"oh, come on. just tell me the truth," you groaned, pinching the bridge of your nose in frustration, "you don't like being around me anymore and that's okay, but don't lead me on like this."

"i never said that," he pushed ahead, taking another step as his voice rose. he hated your assumptions.

"well, that's what it feels like! if you had a phone in your dorm i highly doubt you'd answer it if you knew it was me! i've been with you all day and you haven't even kissed me!" you rambled and vented, your voice wavering as your emotions spilled.

he blinked at you a few times, but you couldn't tell what was going on in his head. you didn't give him a chance to speak.

"i just need to know what's wrong, what am i doing wrong? what can i do to fix this or is it too late?" you asked, "i'm starting to get scared about us, angus... is there someone else? another woman that caught your eye? i need you to tell me what your problem is so i can move on instead of living ever single day worried that you’re loving someone else!”

all you were doing was prying for an answer, something to ease your emotions that had begun to eat your alive. you needed to mend your breaking heart and the truth was needed to begin the process. you watched angus carefully to see his reaction, you noticed the way his brows furrowed. how his hands moved to his hips and his cheeks were red in anger.

you knew throwing that assumption at him wasn’t a healthy and communicative way to reach am answer, but these feelings had been bubbling for a long time now. you didn’t have the means to keep your bottle lid tight anymore.

a sharp exhale came from him, "oh, that's fucking rich coming from you," he spat at you loud and dramatically with a forced laugh, his arms crossing as he stared at you in a mix of fury and amusement.

"what does that mean?" you questioned defensively, you hadn't realized how loud your voice had gotten until someone banged on the wall, an annoyed neighbour. you lowered your voice and hissed in a stage whisper, "i've never done anything that should make you assume anything like that. you're being a prick right now."

"uh-huh," he breathed, unconvinced, "so when i saw you practically crawling over that douchebag from your statistics class in the library that was nothing?" you widened your eyes as he spoke, "i'm surprised you weren't fucking him then and there, so forgive me if i've been distant. i suppose i had a hard time swallowing down the fact that i've fallen in love with a girl who thinks it's okay to entertain other men behind my back!"

he had been stepping closer toward you as he ranted, his words sharp and leaving you stinging raw. his patronizing tone was hard to listen to and tears stung your eyes.

both of you were clouded over with stress and anger, riddled with worst case scenarios simply because neither of you could stomach a civil conversation. it was fear holding you two back, both of you assuming that the end of your relationship was near. that you both found love in another, someone better, smarter—more attractive.

"i need you to get out of my apartment." you tell him, sniffling as your nose got runny as you fought back tears, "i don't let men in my home who accuse me of being a slut."

"i didn't call you that–" he said, voice softening, but the frustration still noticeable.

"you implied it and that's enough, angus," your voice wasn't loud anymore as you settled into temporary silence, "i have no intention of leaving you and when i asked if you wanted to move in with you it's because you are the only person i imagine spending the rest of my life with," you say, losing your fight against the tears, "and since then, you've been avoiding me like the fucking plague!"

"i'm sorry, you know i didn't mean to," he stepped closer and you took a step back.

“out!” you hissed, pointing to your apartment door and unmoving until angus had started backing his belongings into his side satchel. you couldn’t even look at him.

you knew very well that you were both wrong with your assumptions of infidelity, there was no one involved in your lives but each other. though, you were far from the appropriate headspace to have a productive conversation and the last thing you needed was for this to end with more tears.

angus’ hand was on the doorknob when he paused, those big brown eyes of his wide and apologetic. his mouth parted to say something, but then he frowned and shoved his apology down his throat before leaving.

the sound of the door slamming echoed and you were left with a heart so fragile that it would break from a slight breeze. your apartment was quiet. you were alone and empty.

you’d only realized now that you and angus had never had an argument before. at least, not like this.

avoiding angus was difficult. anytime something came up, you had the urge to find him and tell him only to remember you were supposed to be mad at him! what kind of a boyfriend accuses you of being with another man just because you laugh at his jokes? but what kind of girlfriend accuses their boyfriend of cheating without even a morsel of evidence?

the entire situation reeked of insecurity and as much as you’d love to wait for an apology, you weren’t certain that the weight of it should be left entirely to angus. you were hurt by him, but so was he.

a week had passed and you'd just finished writing your first final exam, certain you aced it even though you'd been spending most nights crying versus actually studying. the fresh spring air soothed you when you made the trek back to your apartment, your textbooks clutched against your chest and angus' jean jacket shielding your body from the wind.

on the way home you had started creating scenarios in your head, trying to plan out your words for when you finally spoke to angus. you were so lost in your head that you hadn't heard the sounds of someone sneaking passed the front door of your apartment complex before it locked shut.

your finger pushed the 'up' button on the elevator passed the foyer and a voice coming from behind you nearly made you shriek.

you spun on your heels and saw your boyfriend, cheeks red and out of breath.

"what the hell, angus. did you run here?"

"i'm sorry," he cut you off, speaking through laboured breaths, "but yeah, i ran her, but that's beside the point," he rambled as you watched him, your eyes full of awe and heart full. you had been yearning to see him for so long now–you couldn't stay mad at him, "i was a dick to accuse you and i was an even bigger dick for not telling you what's been going on."

you let out a soft breath, "it's okay, angus, you don't have to apologize."

"i do, actually," he cut you off again, swallowing down a nervous lump in his throat as he focused on speaking between heavy breaths, "when you accused me of finding love in someone else i retaliated because it was easier to give up and end things there instead of putting everything into this relationship just for you to take my heart and smash it up into a bunch of fucking pieces," as he spoke, you could see the way the tension gave up in his shoulders, "i have trust issues if you can't tell." he let out an awkward laugh, feeling pathetic in front of you.

your eyes stung with tears again, but now for a reason that filled your heart with relief and love. the weight of the world lifted and you decided then and there that angus would be the man you would be spending the rest of your life with.

"you can trust me."

"i'll try."

when the elevator doors opened you pulled him in, arms snaking around his neck as your lips crashed into a kiss full of need and hunger. you'd never gone so long without his touch and you missed it, the way he tasted like cigarettes and coca-cola, or the way his hands always went straight to your back, hands sliding underneath your clothing because he loved the way your skin felt smooth against his hands.

"angus," you whimpered as your body rocked over his, straddling his hips as your head tilted back and exhausted eyes fixated on the ceiling. you were full of him, your body weak and tired but not yet giving in to release because you'd be damned if you'd let this moment go too soon, "i love you."

hands caressed every surface of your skin, fingertips tracing circles on your bare hips, hands massaging your breasts or wrapping around your neck.

"i love you too," angus groaned from beneath you, reaching a hand up so he could put his thumb on your chin and force your gaze down at him.

you moved slowly and effortlessly on top of him, relishing in the slowness of this moment and how perfectly your bodies moulded together. you'd never been so certain about love before as you stared down and smiled, looking into those brown eyes that pulled you in the first time you saw him two years prior.

"i trust you," he breathed out and you let euphoria consume you.

– @thekid-ofsteel sent me the best drabble ideas, though this one turned into a fic LOL. i'm not sure if i do angst well enough, but i tried. :')

#angus tully #angus tully x reader #the holdovers #the holdovers fic #angus tully fic #wordsbyspatial #dominic sessa

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spatialwave · 6 months

Text

jordan is the type of person to realize that marie didn’t get to have a ‘typical’ teenage experience, so they make sure she does.

they take her on an awkward, first date where they watch a cheesy romcom at a theatre and hold hands in the most uncomfortable position.

they make a fake promposal sign for her so she can experience being asked to the prom.

they sneak them both out past curfew and go find an empty playground so they can go on the swings together and talk until it’s nearly dawn.

jordan always thinks about the little things.

#muse: jordan #gen v #limoreau #marie moreau #jordan li #wordsbyspatial

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spatialwave · 1 month

Note

Can you do an Angus Tully NSFW alphabet?

𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐔𝐒 𝐓𝐔𝐋𝐋𝐘 – 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐬𝐟𝐰 𝐚𝐥𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐭.

notes: 18+. fem!reader/college au. 18+ characters. thank you for asking me to do this. <3

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

angus tully is a darling with aftercare, something that comes naturally to him. he loves to pepper your face with chaste kisses and coo gentle praises in your ear as you cuddle. if you don’t use a condom he’ll make sure to get a towel to clean you up, or you two will sneak to the showers together.

he’s so fucking kind with you—always making sure you know how loved you are after he’s made ruins of you.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

he loves your tits, they’re his favourite thing in the entire world. he’ll touch them any chance he gets and will constantly ask you to wear something low-cut. it makes him so incredibly hard when you don’t wear a bra, his cock twitching in excitement anytime he can see your hard nipples pressing through your shirt.

his own favourite body part is his cock. he’s well endowed and you were the one to tell him that. angus thought he was very average, but when you dropped your jaw the first time you saw him hard and naked he grew very smug and not-so-humble. his ego was never the same.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

angus cums a lot and he likes to see it on you. he loves cumming on your face with your tongue sticking out, seeing how it decorates you. he thinks you look so pretty when it dribbles down your chin.

his favourite place to cum is inside you, though. he ruts into you as he finishes, slowly rocking until he pulls back and watches how it drips out of your pussy. he’ll use his fingers to push it back inside of you, fucking you with them until your reach your peak.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

angus likes stealing your panties after you fuck. he'll keep them to jerk off with, sometimes putting them in his mouth to bite them. when you find out he's embarrassed as hell, but when you suggest that he can use them to cover your moans that becomes his new favourite thing.

anytime you get too loud, he'll bundle up your panties and shove them between your lips as a makeshift gag.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

angus tully has little experience—he’s had his first kiss & made out with girls before. nothing serious, especially since graduating from an all-boys school. when he met you he was lacking in recent experience and was still a virgin. though, after reading enough porno mags, he had a general idea of how to please a woman, but he learned the most from you.

he listens to your soft sounds and whimpers when his fingers curl inside you, how your moans choke in your throat when his tongue circles your clit. he’s a perceptive person, you hardly have to show him a thing and by your third time sleeping together he has you writhing on the bedsheets crying out his name.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

he loves when you ride him because he has the perfect view of your tits bouncing. he likes holding onto your hips and helping you bounce up and down on his cock. however, he greatly prefers when you grind on him and fucking yourself on him, his eyes staying focused on you as you moan and mewl as you feel him hit deep inside your pussy.

he also loves the hook position because sometimes he needs to control the pace and fuck you like crazy. your thighs pressed against your chest and calves resting over his shoulders, giving him perfect access to thrust into you as deep and hard as you both crave.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

it depends on the situation. if you’re high, he’s always laughing, especially when you two are kissing—he just feels so elated and happy to be with you. effortlessly pleased and madly in love. early in your relationship, he was goofy too, mostly out of inexperience as you two learned each other’s bodies and made mistakes.

he’s mostly serious now, concentrating on how his cock penetrates you just right and making sure you get nothing less than euphoria.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

angus doesn't groom that much, mostly thanks to hippie culture. he will give himself a good trim if you request it. he also has a happy trail that he's very proud of.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

this is something that depends on your 'style' during the act. if the two of you are feeling desperate and needy, there's little romance and a ton of heady passion. if you're more vanilla and gentle, he'll whisper in your ear how much he loves you, how lucky he is, etc.

he's a romantic at heart, so sometimes he prefers to have those gentler moments with you to remind you of his love.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

he masturbates so much. it started with porno mags, but now all he needs is to picture your tits and he’s hard and ready to go. he jerks off any chance he gets when he’s alone, which is a lot more now that he has his own dorm room.

he loves watching you masturbate too, his eyes fixated on you while your fingers push inside your pussy and circle your clit. he’ll oftentimes stroke himself when watching, licking his lips as you toy with yourself under his gaze.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

teasing, biting, mild exhibitionism, giving praise, edging/orgasm control, watching you beg for his cock.

angus is a kinky man, but like many others, it comes with the more experience he gets. when he learns about edging, you can say goodbye to the times when you were able to cum as freely as you wanted as he fucks you. now he prefers to tease you and watch you beg for him to put his cock back inside your aching pussy.

(he also has a breeding kink that he's embarrassed about.)

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

his bed, by far. it's private and away from the other college students, the only downside is having to try to be quiet so the r.a. doesn't knock on his door mid-orgasm again.

angus likes the showers, too. they're not co-ed, but that doesn't stop him from sneaking you into the men's washrooms so you two can fuck in one of the shower stalls. to the boys that pass by, they usually try to ignore the muffled moans coming from the stall with two sets of feet visible from where the curtain ends.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

his biggest turn-on is when you're flirty and touchy with him, especially in public. he likes it when you bat your lashes at him and chew on your lip coyly, or when you're walking through campus together and your fingers brush along his hand slowly and softly–making his skin tingle.

when he's extra sensitive, sometimes he'll need to pull you aside somewhere private so you can get on your knees and take care of the problem you created for him. most of the time you two will decide to skip class and head to his dorm.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

he doesn't like being called daddy... for personal reasons.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

he loves when you suck his cock, seeing the way you look up at him with your mouth and throat full of him. his hands in your hair, tugging as he pushes himself deeper and seeing how tears prick your eyes when he cums.

his preference is eating you out. he wasn't as skillful at first as he is now, so expert in his skills that oftentimes he can make you cum in a few minutes with just his tongue and fingers. he loves how you taste, swirling his tongue around your clit and licking you up and down until his mouth and chin are dripping with your juices. he especially loves when you ride his face because he gets the perfect view of your bouncing tits while indulging in your heat.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

angus usually leans more toward fast and rough with his movements, he isn't sure where exactly he gets his energy from, but lord knows he uses it well. he loves seeing how big of a mess you turn into when he's fucking you from behind with quick, hard thrusts–fingers digging into your hips as you cry out his name with your face shoved into the pillows.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

angus loves quickies, especially the ones that could potentially lead to you two being caught. quick fucks in the showers, a janitor's closet, or hidden in the quietest section of the library. you two don't do them often, but when life gets busy around midterms and finals, you two find yourselves needing those bursts of release.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

the biggest risk angus takes with you is not using condoms. he loves filling your pussy with his come and watching how it spills out of you and he never wants to change that. when you told him you were on the pill it was like all his wildest fantasies came true.

he also likes to experiment with semi-public sex. you giving him head in the back of a dark movie theatre or going shopping and fucking in a changing room.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

he can go for a looong time because he's learned how to pace himself. there was one time you realized that you'd be fucking for nearly two hours, your bodies were so sore that the next day you both had to skip class because there was no way your legs weren't giving out.

he usually has enough energy to go out at least two rounds, at the very least enough to make sure you still cum after he does.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

angus doesn't own any toys himself, but is curious about them when you mention it. the only toy that you two purchase together is the hitachi magic wand after spotting it in a sex shop. it becomes a staple in your sexual escapades. he loves using it on you, watching how your hips twitch when the vibrations overstimulate you while he fucks you slowly and steadily.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

oh, how angus loves teasing you. it all started when you two were just friends, he'd notice how his teasing remarks about you would make your cheeks and ears turn red. then, when you two became sexual with each other, he wondered how that would translate into sex.

it worked wonders on him, loving the way you'd blush underneath him when he teases you. "you want my cock so bad, don't you?" he says as he just barely pushes the head of his cock inside of you, smiling when you pout and whine for him to keep going.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

he isn't that loud, usually groaning and grunting in your ear with each snap of his hips. his words are breathy and heavy when he talks to you while fucking, his warm breath tickling your ear and neck.

when he cums, though, he'll moan loud enough that you're certain the other students could hear from their dorms. he loves when you're riding on top of him and your hand covers his mouth when he cums, enjoying the bit of dominance you get over him.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

if there is one way to get dominance over angus it's to kiss and bite at his neck and ears, it'll leave him melting and begging you to keep going. when you bite and suck at his skin he'll let out the most pitiful, whiny moans and can be convinced to do almost anything.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

angus is a thin and lanky guy, muscle mass isn't his friend and it never will be. you love that about him.

he also has a bigger-than-average dick, that's what you love about him even more. it's around 7.5" and it's decently girthy, but not crazy. the best part about him is that he can actually use it well–lucky you.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

angus has a high sex drive and it surprised you. it can even be a little annoying sometimes, especially when you are stressed with homework and he's sitting next to you in the library with his hand trying to find its way into your skirt while hidden under the table. you can't hide the fact that you love the attention and whenever you're in the mood he's ready and waiting patiently.

he always says how he's so lucky to have the hottest girlfriend, so can you blame him for being constantly horny around you?

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

he's a heavy sleeper. seriously, the dude is like a rock when he falls asleep and he falls asleep fast. one second he'll be cleaning you up with a towel and the next his face is buried into your neck and hair, snoring gently into your ear. it's very cute.

#angus tully #angus tully x reader #dominic sessa #the holdovers #wordsbyspatial #spatialanswers

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spatialwave · 24 days

Note

What if Barton and reader's all girls school had like a formal together??? And Angus had a crush on reader for the longest time and finally asks her to the formal?

please, this is sooo cute! this was so fun to write. 🥺❤️

st. hilda’s all-girls boarding school had a tight-knit relationship with the nearby all-boys school, barton academy. they often came together for large church services and holiday dinners, but most importantly for the students—it was the events that struck their attention.

being stuck at these schools meant that time for love and relationships were hard to come by, you rarely had enough time to spend together if you wanted to date. most of the older students resorted to sneaking out at nights or on the weekends to see each other. getting caught meant too many detentions to count on one hand.

that’s why it surprised you that angus tully was so keen on visiting you when he could. the two of you had met earlier in your junior year at the first formal dance they held in early september, a dance to kick off the school year and to allow the students to mingle.

it’s often where most relationships began.

you and angus had hit it off, he was hilarious and awkward, his jokes either making you roll your eyes or your stomach hurt from laughing. you two clicked together well, and had slowly become inseparable, mostly because angus always ventured away from barton to find you.

you’d had a crush on angus for awhile now, pretty much since the day you had met him. it was his smile and big brown eyes that lured you in like fish bait—you were hooked.

it was a week until the final formal of the school years in which all students could attend, unlike prom, which was only for the seniors. you’d been sitting in your dorm room, reading a novel for your english class when you heard a soft tapping sound against your window. looking up, you saw angus peering in, though mostly covered from the curtains.

“christ!” you laughed, moving to the window and unlatching the locks to slide it up, “what are you doing here?”

angus’ cheeks were red, the chilly march air stinging them, “can i come in?”

you nodded, backing up and making room for angus to pull himself up and into the dorm. he was far from graceful, nearly knocking over the alarm clock on your nightstand as he landed in with a hard thud. you giggled at his horrible performance and closed the window behind him, “are you going to tell me why you’re here?”

“am i not allowed to visit you?” he questioned as he moved to sit on your bed, getting comfortable and shrugging his coat off of his shoulders.

“no, no, it’s fine,” you smiled, sitting across from him on your desk chair, tilting your head curiously, “something’s on your mind, what is it?”

you could read angus like a book these days, it was easy to spot when he was mulling something over. it made you uneasy now, though, because he was avoiding your gaze. you also didn’t want to jump to conclusions, but there was a part of you that wondered… did this have to do with the formal? did he find a girl to take? did he want to take you?

“i just wanted to come see you, that’s all, seriously,” he said, swallowing a lump down his throat as he stared at you. angus tully had a crush on you the moment he set eyes on you several months ago, currently battling butterflies in his stomach that made him want to double over and shoo them away.

narrowed eyes focused on him as you crossed one leg over the other, deciding to bite the bullet, “does this have to do with the formal?”

“what? no,” angus scoffed it off as something laughable, but then his lips twitched and expressions dropped as he flickered his gaze back and forth on yours, “…yes.”

you asked the question and hadn’t prepared yourself for what the answer might be, leaving you in a state of shock with bright red cheeks as you two stared at each other in silence. you then prepared yourself for the worst, for him to admit he asked another girl and that there was nothing between you. devastating news.

“well, go on,” you told him, chewing on the inside of your cheek.

“i, uh, well—“ he stuttered, “it’s not that simple.”

your eyebrows furrowed, “why not?”

“i had this whole speech prepared,” he said, shifting over his spot on the bed and fidgeting with his hands, “and i forgot most of it.”

in silence again, you stared at angus with anxiety filling your stomach. you didn’t dare say anything more, instead just keeping your gaze fixed on him as you waited.

“do you want to go to the formal with me?” angus couldn’t hold it back anymore, his hands on his knees now and nails digging at the corduroy fabric.

“oh—“

“and not as a friend, like, actually go with me. like a date,” he cut you off, his cheeks growing pink as he forced himself to keep talking, “i’ve liked you for a while now and i needed to ask you before someone else did. so, um,” he glanced down at his hands shyly, “i know this isn’t the most romantic admission in history and i totally understand if you say no, but would you go with me?”

he tilted his head up to look at you again, eyes widening when he saw the big grin on your face.

you nodded wildly, lips parting to speak but nothing came out. instead you threw yourself off of your chair and wrapped your arms around angus’ neck, pushing him back on the bed with you on top. without even thinking you pressed your lips against his, feeling his body tense for a moment until he relaxed and placed his hands on your hips.

“of course i’ll go with you, you dork,” you smiled against his lips, pulling back and looking down at him, “have you gotten better at dancing yet?”

“not in the slightest,” he laughed, pulling you back down for another long-awaited kiss.

#angus tully #angus tully x reader #the holdovers #angus tully fic #the holdovers fic #wordsbyspatial #spatialanswers

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spatialwave · 6 months

Text

jordan and marie at the club is everything to me. molly, coke, alcohol — mostly consumed by jordan.

they’re possessive when they’re out with marie, dancing on the light up floor with their hips rolling together. dirty dancing.

surprisingly, jordan is most possessive in their female form, gentle hands holding marie’s waist with a vice grip and keeping them together. they like to look over her shoulder while they’re in their male form, glaring at anyone who’s looking at her while kissing her neck.

meanwhile, marie doesn’t notice and is just having the best night of her life with her partner. 🩵

#gen v #limoreau #mariejordan #jordan li #marie moreau #jordan li x marie moreau #wordsbyspatial

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spatialwave · 13 days

Note

just read your pre calc fic please write another omg it was soooooo good

eek, i'm so happy you liked it! i thought i'd use this ask as a way to continue the story. 🤍

𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐬 𝐭𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐲, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐨𝐧 𝐛𝐨𝐲 𝐭𝐮𝐭𝐨𝐫. 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐. notes: fem!reader <- prev.

—

being tutored by angus tully had become far less tutoring and more learning about each other, and not through conversation. you knew it was becoming an issue when your grades hardly budged, moving up to a c-minus, which wasn’t horrible, but far from ivy league worthy. there was only one month left in your junior year, meaning one month left to make a good impact on your grades and head into senior year with a head start on calculus.

it wasn’t looking good for you.

even if you couldn’t muster an a-minus, you hoped that your extra curriculars would stand out on your applications. you could only put so much time in theatre, community volunteering and chess club—was pre-calculus really all that important?

especially when there were better things to worry about than math, such as the way angus’ hand on your thigh sent shivers up your spine. his brown eyes glued to the pages of the textbook, looking through his lashes as his thumb grazed over your bare skin absently. this closeness became your comfort, the library at your school often quiet enough in the evenings that you two could relish in each other.

it’s not like your peers would rat you out anyway, you had started to notice how many secretive relationships were had between the two schools. you became truly aware of the fact when you’d been looking for a history textbook one night and heard the sounds of soft breathing and moaning coming from an aisle over… though, you couldn’t be certain that it was a girl and a boy.

as you looked down at your homework, able to comprehend it better than the month prior, you found yourself wanting to focus on anything but the coursework due the following day.

“i think my teacher is getting curious of why my grades aren’t improving fast enough,” you murmured, dropping your pencil onto the textbook as you aired a concern that had been eating you away, “why can’t i get the hang of it?”

“maybe if you paid attention,” angus was quick to react, those eyes flickering to you as he straightened up slightly with his hand still glued to your thigh.

“wow, that is totally not my fault,” you breathed, annoyed at his lack of empathy over your situation.

“it’s my fault?” he asked, lips curving into a grin that exposed his teeth.

you blinked a few times, gazing into his eyes before you looked down at his hand and hoping he’d followed your gaze. when you looked back up, you saw the way he chewed on his lip, biting back a cheeky smile as he kept his hand there.

“fine,” he said, removing his hand, “i’ll be good.”

“thank you,” you said, straightening up and adjusting your skirt. you already missed his touch, but you knew this was for the better—you two had plenty of other opportunities to use your free time to get handsy. right now, you needed to focus on what was important.

the air was tense between you two as angus moved on with the content, keeping his distance as he explained equations that managed to stick. you knew it wasn’t like magic, you wouldn’t wake up tomorrow a pre-calculus genius, but it was quite magical to see the wonders that concentration could bring.

when the clock struck nine o’clock in the evening, it was curfew for all students. with a soft sigh you started packing your things into a pile so you could take them back to your room.

“sorry for being bossy,” your voice was soft, “i’m just getting worried about college.”

you looked over at angus, surprised to see the boy sitting there with a smile. admiring you.

“what?” you asked, feeling self conscious under his eyes.

“nothing,” he chuckled, “am i not allowed to look at you either? you are bossy.”

“i’m not in the mood for being teased,” you huffed, though your worries were immediately gone when angus leaned over and pressed his lips against yours. something you’d gotten used to.

the kiss was quick, but he didn’t pull back too far from you, his arm now extended over the back of your chair to keep you close.

“i’ll be careful at our next tutoring session, alright? i guess it’s hard to keep my hands from you. don’t realize i’m doing it,” angus admitted, his cheeks just the tiniest bit rosy.

“it’s okay,” you murmured in return, smiling at the awkwardness radiating from the boy you’d been crushing on—hard, “if it’s any consolation, if i had the willpower to concentrate i’d rather you kept doing it.”

a smile spread on angus’ lips as he laughed softly, leaning forward and pressing a kiss on your cheek. a domestic action that made your stomach swirl, mostly because you two still hadn’t talked about what was happening between you. though, you didn’t really mind, the uncertainty made you giddy, rather than nervous, like you were each other’s secret.

“well, i should go,” angus sighed as he pulled away from you, but you were quick to reach for him.

“wait,” you squeaked, grabbing his wrist, “maybe you can stay for a bit. i mean, i feel like i deserve a reward.” you spotted the way the boy’s eyes lit in excitement, eager to see where you were going with this, “what do you think?”

a confident smile spread on his lips as you dropped your hand from him, those brown eyes of his flickering around the library to make sure that it was empty enough. you were filled with that excited uncertainty again, thankful that instead of putting his things away he whisked you far in the depths of the library shelves. a place the two of you had grown familiar with, a place where your hands had found spots up in the shelves to keep you upright while angus explored every inch of you that he could.

while you wondered what it would be like to decide on a title of what you two ‘were’, those thoughts were easily dismissed when his lips were on your neck. angus was good at making a mess out of you, hair wild and skirt pushed up to your waist as his lips and hands made quick work of leaving you breathless.

but you had enough breath to utter a few words that made you wish you could dig a grave for yourself.

“what are we?” you asked through a satisfied sigh as you focused on the feeling of his lips against your skin. it was cut short when angus’ face quickly pulled away from your collarbones where he’d popped open most of the buttons of your school-issued shirt.

“what?” he asked, curls wild and out of place, cheeks red.

“i—“ you stuttered, “i don’t know. i didn’t mean to ask. ignore that.”

angus swallowed, his adam’s apple bobbing as he cleared his throat and pulled himself back enough to give you two some room.

“i don’t—“

“please, let’s not talk about it,” you whined, the silence between the two of you eating you alive.

nearly out of breath, angus laughed, lifting a hand to brush his curls out of his face, “let me talk.”

you didn’t answer, instead deciding to button up your shirt and fix your hair; you knew you’d be saying your goodbyes quickly. then, the boy’s hand grabbed at your chin and tilted your head so you were forced to look at him, your hands gripping at your half-buttoned shirt.

you saw how angus was trying desperately to be confident, but his twitching lips and pink cheeks spoke volumes on how nervous his was. you still wished you could turn back time and keep your mouth shut.

“do you want to know how i really feel about you?” he asked, and you prepared for the worst. you always did.

nodding slowly, you shuddered as his hand moved to cup your cheek.

“i… i really like you,” he murmured, “a lot… and i’m scared to mess it up. that’s why i keep my mouth shut about anything between us, i feel like if i decide to make this real then i’ll find a way to screw it up like everything else.”

the honesty was palpable, angus was wearing his heart on his sleeve as he aired everything out to you. you empathized fully, a smile breaking on your lips as you felt seen, and most of all—loved.

“i really like you too. like a lot… if you can’t tell.” you blushed, finding it hard to keep your eyes locked on his.

“i can tell,” he teased, rubbing his thumb along your cheek as the two of you allowed yourself the space to take pleasure in your admissions of romantic interest. he took in a deep breath and exhaled out, obviously doing his best to keep himself calm, “would you, uh… say yes if i asked you to be my girlfriend?”

elated. you were so elated to hear that question fall from his lips and you wanted to jump into his arms and laugh loudly with joy. though, you kept quiet lest you wanted your library rendezvous to end in detention.

a big, toothy grin spread on your lips and you spoke coyly, “sure. i’ll be your girlfriend.”

#angus tully #angus tully x reader #the holdovers #angus tully fic #the holdovers fic #wordsbyspatial #spatialanswers

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spatialwave · 6 months

Text

jordan li is so insufferable when they start officially dating marie.

cate has something to say? sorry, jordan will go “hm?” five times while texting marie furiously before she gives up and walks away.

they obnoxiously like to bring up “having a girlfriend” whenever they can in a conversation, even though the entire student body knows.

pda isn’t their strong suit but once they notice eyes on marie — oh, they are all over her. hand holding, hand tucked into her jean’s back pocket. kissing her in the middle of the busy halls and getting in everyone’s way. desperately needing to make it known to others that marie is off-limits.

“you know you don’t have to prove we’re together, right?” marie murmurs, jordan’s arm around her waist and fingers brushing against the skin exposed between her shirt and pants, “pretty sure everyone knows.” she glanced momentarily at her partner, watching how confident they look with their sunglasses on and a smirk on their lips.

they walk outside through the crowds of students as godolkin’s newest power couple. so many eyes on them. it’s a first for marie, not used to this level of attention.

all jordan can do is snort out a laugh, “is that what you think i’m doing?” they murmur, their voice loud in marie’s ear as they lean close and speak, “can’t i just publicly appreciate you?” they press a kiss to her temple as they tug her impossibly closer, simply unable to keep their hands away.

“you’re so embarrassing,” marie whines, but there’s a sparkle of enjoyment in her eyes.

she loves it & jordan knows it.

#limoreau #jordan li #marie moreau #jordan li x marie moreau #gen v #tell me why i’m imagining that scene with edward cullen and bella walking through the school together for the first time #slay moment #wordsbyspatial

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spatialwave · 18 days

Text

𝐝𝐚𝐳𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝. 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐰𝐨.

“𝐋𝐎𝐕�� 𝐇𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐒”

pairing: angus tully x fem!reader | benny o’donnell x fem!reader word count: 10.6k summary: school is out, and you’re free of the shackles of education, an entire summer in the horizon. after pickford’s end-of-school party gets busted, boredom and uncertainty strikes. instead of drinking and partying, you find yourself falling deeper and deeper into a love triangle you hadn’t meant to get yourself caught in — what will you do? who will you choose? warnings/tags: underage drinking and drug use, use of homophobic slurs, bullying, verbal assault, jealousy, love triangle. notes: not me writing this and actually getting obsessed with benny (cole hauser). still not beta'd, so apologies for grammatical/pacing errors!

(ao3 vers.) <- chapter one.

Sharing a joint before coming home was not the smartest decision you’d made in your career as a high school student. The haziness had left your limbs heavy and your mind up in the clouds, your bed so incredibly inviting. In fact, so inviting that the moment you stepped into your room, you had curled up into your bed and nuzzled into the blankets.

Your body was heavy, but floating. All you could think about was Angus Tully, a smile spreading as your fingers pressed against your lips. You were lost in your imagination, mind stuck on wondering what it would feel like with his lips pressed against yours. How his body would feel pressed over yours, hands in his wild curls, legs wrapped around his hips so he’s flush against you. Heavy breaths and the taste of weed on your lips as your tongues brushed together.

Soon, you were far in a dreamless nap until you heard the clanking of pots and pans from the kitchen—your mother cooking dinner. The sleep had left you disoriented, your hair in a mess and arms achy from passing out in an uncomfortable position. You wished to fall asleep again.

With the evening sun moving down into the horizon and the night sky daring to take over, you couldn’t will yourself to get out of bed. All your mind could focus on was the day you’d just had, and you were nearly content with laying back down and imagining it all over again. The afternoon you’d spent with Angus and how you couldn’t wait to see him again, even with the plans of a party falling through.

You would see him at some point, but when and where?

Without the effects of weed, you were left with a knot in your stomach, a reminder of how nervous you were about the situation. It was easier to be inebriated and forget about the harsh reality of Angus being a ‘taken’ man, versus you being sober and seeing Elise’s face burned into your head every time you closed your eyes.

Eventually, after a few minutes of fighting off the urge to sleep and reminding yourself you wasted precious time, you forced yourself up in your bed and rubbed away the tiredness in your eyes. It took a forceful push for you to crawl out of bed and placing your feet on your carpeted floor, wiggling your toes as you slowly woke up and came back into your consciousness.

You wobbled over to your dresser and reached to your record player, putting the tonearm down and placing the needle onto the record–Dreamboat Annie by Heart. Your all-time favourite record.

The best decision you made since coming home was a hot shower that nearly burned your skin, ending it off with a quick rinse of cold water to jolt you awake from the grogginess that had consumed you. Music played through the closed door of your adjoined bathroom, lucky enough to score a better bedroom than Mitch, your younger brother. Softly singing along to the muffled sounds of Crazy on You, you dried off your body and let your wet hair cling to your damp skin, eyes looking over your body in the foggy mirror. You often tried not to look at yourself too much in mirrors, a practice that was ingrained into you as a young child from your mother reprimanding you from being ‘too vain’–ah, the joys of living in a catholic household.

Then, before you could act in vain, the pounding of someone knocking on your bedroom door furiously took your attention, and you wondered if your mother found out about you smoking with Angus and Slater. You hurriedly finished drying your body and moved back into your bedroom with the towel wrapped around you, body shivering at the difference in air temperature.

“What?” You snapped at the bothersome knocking, pressing your ear against the door, expecting your mother’s voice and the imminent disapproval of your actions.

“Angus is outside,” your brother’s voice spoke. He sounded tired, but you remembered he’d just gotten home from his baseball game–meaning you hardly had anytime before Kaye would be showing up.

And here you were, in a towel, and the boy you’d been dreaming about waiting for you outside.

“Fuck,” you whined, hearing the footsteps of your brother move away, “thanks for letting me know!”

You panicked in your room, looking around as you dropped the towel and quickly dug in your dresser for clothes, anything remotely decent for the party. It was hard to slip on with your damp skin, but you’d eventually managed to get into high-waisted denim bell-bottoms and a cropped, flower-print halter top that exposed your belly. It even managed to make you look bustier than normal, you wouldn’t complain about that.

Your hair was still wet as you unlocked your bedroom door and made way for the front, spotting a shadowy figure through the small window on the door. Taking a calming, deep breath, you reached for the door handle and slowly opened it, peaking out of it first before committing to stepping outside.

Immediately, your eyes settled on Angus, the tall, lanky boy leaning against the column that held up the awning over the front door. Those brown eyes flickered up to look at you, a delighted smile adorning his lips as he pushed off the column and shoved his hands into his pockets. With a breathy, nervous laugh, you fully stepped outside and closed the door behind you, pressing your weight back against it as you forced yourself to meet his piercing gaze.

“What are you doing here?” You asked, hands tucked behind your body and fidgeting with them as you kept steady breaths.

“I brought Mitch back from his ball game and wanted to see what you were up to,” he replied, still grinning shyly, “I know it’s only been a couple of hours, but I was here already. So, yeah… just wanted to pop-in.”

There was that awkward side of him again, a part of him you saw when no one else was around. A shy, awkward kid that you could only imagine was most of his personality when he was younger and far before he’d made it as a popular football player. Though, it was all speculation, you still hadn’t known much about his younger self—you’d love to know.

“Thanks for bringing him back… Did they get him?” You asked, cringing at the mere thought of your younger brother getting caught by the senior boys, exposed to harsh paddling.

“Uh, yeah, unfortunately.” Angus pulled his eyes away, “Kountze is such a prick, I told your brother to ice up for a bit or else he’d be having a hard time sitting for a few weeks.”

“At least he’s home now,” you sighed, arms crossed over your body as you sympathized with your brother’s pain.

Silence rose between you two, and you found yourself unable to look up at Angus. You could see out of your peripheral that it was the same for him, his eyes dropping to look at his feet.

“Don’t you have somewhere else to be?” You asked quietly, an amused expression on your face as you two connected eyes again.

“What? This doesn’t count as something?” He chided in return, stepping closer to you, and you almost wanted to ask if he could reach forward and slip his finger into your belt loop like he did earlier. Tug your hips together and talk some more, shameless flirting. You lived for his attention like it was a drug.

Craved it.

“It is something, but I’m not sure how productive it is,” you laughed, reaching for the door handle behind you, “do you know if anything is happening tonight?”

Angus crinkled his face, signifying that plans were still a bust, “Not really sure yet. Probably going to drive around and see what’s up I guess, maybe go to the Emporium. I just gotta’ go home and change.”

Silence filled the space between you both again, leaving you dumbfounded and chewing on your lip as you racked your brain with something to say that wouldn’t sound stupid. You were drawing a blank, feeling like a young girl talking to a cute boy for the first time. It was easy for that feeling to come back when you were alone with Angus, a testament to how badly you were crushing on him.

“I should, uh-–” you murmured, clearing your throat as you twisted the knob, “go back in and get ready. Kaye will be here any second, and I haven’t even dried my hair.”

That roused a laugh from Angus, his eyes flicking up to your hair that had started to dry at the roots, a bit all over the place, but he liked the authenticity you displayed. He liked you at your best and at your worst, but this was far from your worst. He found himself wanting to stay put, to ask to go inside and spend the rest of his night hanging out with you instead of out driving around and drinking with the boys. Angus could already imagine what you two could get up to if you were alone—it filled him with excitement.

“I’ll see you later, then?” Angus asked, getting his mind out of the gutter, but not yet moving from his spot. He towered over you with that stupid smile, the one that made you want to wipe it away with your lips.

“Maybe,” you couldn’t help but tease, your hand pressing against his chest and pushing him back playfully, fingers relishing in the brief contact, “go on, I’m sure your boys are missing you.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re right. My boys.” he chuckled, moving down the front steps and walking backward to keep his eyes on you, “Don’t you go missing me too much, alright?”

“I never do!” You called out to him through a big smile, watching as he slipped around the other side of his car and clutched his heart, as though you shot him. So dramatic.

Your feet had stayed firmly planted on the ground, eyes watching as he waved at you through his passenger side window before driving off down your block. You stayed there for a few minutes, watching the setting sun, before realization hit, and you ran back inside to finish getting ready.

Makeup and hair was your focus as you raced the clock, fingers careful as you applied colour to your lips and cheeks, coating your lashes in mascara to brighten the eyes and make you look alive. Those same careful hands moved to your hair, styling it several ways before you settled on something that kept it out of your eyes—nothing fancy.

As your finger patted on one final layer of colour to your cheeks, after accidentally smudging your face with mascara and needing a fix, you heard the sound of a car honking outside. Quickly, you did one final look over of yourself in your full-length mirror, sucking in a deep breath and smiling. You looked fucking incredible. You were confident. There was nothing that could ruin your night.

“Goodbye, mom! I’ll see you later!” You called you as you slipped out from your bedroom, waltzing down the hallway excitedly. You had hardly seen her today, only at breakfast and a ten minutes earlier when you snuck into the kitchen and grabbed a small plate of food to settle your stomach before the night began.

“Try not to stay out all night, alright?” She called back, you could hear the sound of her doing the dishes, porcelain clinging together as she stacked the drying rack full, “And don’t be loud, you’ll wake up your grandmother.”

“I promise.” You said, peaking your head into the kitchen to spot your mother, flashing her a smile that simply couldn’t let her be grumpy with you.

“Have fun,” she said to you, rolling her eyes as she put away the last of the dry dishes and watched you slip on your sandals and run out the door, feeling nothing short but free. The two of you always had a great relationship, but as you got older, you could tell that her emotions were starting to get the best of her. Soon, you’d be gone to college and off living your own adult life, she wasn’t ready to let that go yet, and sometimes you had to fight for a night with your friends.

Thankfully, she understood the importance of tonight. She was a senior at Lee High School once.

“Hey! Sabrina!” You cheered, spotting the freshman sitting in the back of Kaye’s Volkswagen Convertible as you jogged out of your front door, eager to get the night started. You slid easily into the passenger seat, settling in and turning on your side to look at the two girls, “how was the car wash?” You asked, a mischievous smile on your lips—thankful you weren’t there to watch the madness.

“Cold,” the freshman chuckled, playing with the ends of her hair as Kaye hit the pedal and the car lurched forward as you made way for a night of driving with the girls, “but I was cleaned off at least. I was starting to feel sick from the smell of mustard. I don’t know if I’ll be able to go to any summer barbecues this year.”

“Hope the other girls weren’t too hard on you,” you hummed in thought, leaning against the seat and watching over the brunette, who seemed much too sweet for her own good. You could already see the heads she’d be turning at school in the fall, you wondered how Darla would make do with it. She reeked of insecurity, the type of girls to get jealous over fresh meat coming in and whisking attention away.

“No, they were good,” she assured, “Then after Kaye dropped me off and invited me along tonight.”

“Wow, she does have a heart,” you spoke in feigned awe, earning a playful shove from Kaye, who glared at you from the driver’s seat.

After the sun fully set beyond the horizon, and you and Kaye had smoked a couple cigarettes and assaulted Sabrina with questions about the upcoming school year, you found yourself watching the scenery that passed by. You’d also mentioned to them how Pickford’s party was busted, unsurprised was that they’d heard about it already. New travelled sickeningly fast.

You smiled to yourself as you enjoyed the cool breeze on your skin from the top of the car being down, relief from the hot sun earlier that afternoon.

“So, you left with Angus early,” Kaye said, looking in the rearview and connecting her gaze with Sabrina, who wasn’t looped into the entirety of the drama, “Right, to get you up to speed, Miss Freshman, your favourite senior here is a conniving, two-timing woman.”

“I am not conniving!” You gasped, swatting at Kaye.

“Kidding! Kidding! I would never accuse you of anything bad. You’re allowed to have options,” She laughed, eyes on the road as you three cruised down random neighbourhood roads, navigating your way downtown to stop at Top Notch. You rolled your eyes, but did not interrupt, allowing Kaye her space to go on. She cleared her throat, “So, to sum it up into one sentence, she’s in a casual, steamy relationship with Benny, but has the hots for Angus, a certified popular quarterback who is already dating Elise… Saying it out loud makes it sound like a cringe-worthy romance movie plot. You are now a walking cliché, I hope you know that.”

Sabrina’s eyes narrowed slightly as she tried to keep up with the information that was being thrown at her, names she’d never heard of and scandals she didn’t quite understand.

“Okay, I would not consider me and Benny to be in a relationship, like, at all. Also, calling Angus a popular quarterback does not do him justice,” you butted in, looking over at Kaye with a quirked brow, “he’s a really sweet guy. He’s kind to me. Not just some popular boy. You know, he doesn’t even like being popular.” Kaye rolled her eyes at your comment, always having another opinion than your own, especially when it came to societal issues.

“That’s the curly haired boy you were talking to, right?” The freshman spoke up, tucking hair behind her ear that was blowing wildly in the wind.

“Yep, that’s him,” you smiled back at Sabrina.

“He likes you,” she smiled, a bit uncertain if her advice was warranted, “I mean, if I were a boy… I’d probably stare at a girl like that if I liked her.”

Redness filled your cheeks at the girl's words of wisdom, which left your stomach in knots.

“But he’s with Elise!” You groaned, letting your head fall back against the seat as you stared up at the night sky, “Love is so complicated. It’s like, does he want me or not? If he does, why won’t he break up with her? I feel so goddamn guilty because of her.”

“Easy, cowgirl,” Kaye chuckled, glancing back at Sabrina and clicking her tongue, “I don’t see why you’ve got your panties in a twist, you don’t even like Elise. I’d go as far as to say you probably hate her.”

“I do not hate her,” you lift a finger, not needing your words to get twisted, “And even if she was the world’s worst person, I would still feel guilty because I’m not a bad person.”

Kaye smirked to herself, fingers gripping the wheel a bit tighter as she listened to your concerns, “So… she does have a heart.” She returned the earlier sentiment.

“You’re an ass,” you groaned, lips twitching into a smile, “What do I do? Sabrina, what would you do?”

You turned in your seat again, eyes locking onto the younger girl and waiting to see what advice she would give. Sure, young teens were inexperienced in all sorts of ways, especially compared to your own, but they always said shit exactly like it was. Wiser than most adults gave them credit for.

The girl thought about it, weighing options in her head, “I would confront him about it,” she advised, “if he does really like you then he’d do something about it… right?”

You kept your eyes on Sabrina, pointing at her with a small smile on your face as you admired her intelligence and common sense, “You’re really smart, kid. You make sure that boys treat you good, okay? And if they don’t, you come and find me.”

“And find a boy that’s not dumb like Benny or Angus.” Kaye jumped in, earning yet another playful swat from you that had Sabrina laughing.

As you all drove down the emptying streets, you felt relief. Sabrina’s words kept repeating in your mind, knowing that the only way through the situation was with confrontation, how was Angus supposed to understand your concerns if he didn’t know what they were? Of course, you hoped that he would break up with her regardless before even attempting to flirt with you, but it’s not like you were the poster child for good morals. In the depths of your mind you kept thinking about Benny—you two were far from dating, having several discussions about keeping it casual, but you feared you two were far closer than what had been said aloud.

It had you thinking of his feelings, knowing that if you wanted to play your cards right and be moral well, you’d have to end things with him. Yet, like the fiend you were, you didn’t want to lose out on your back-up if it all fell through with Angus.

At least Benny was good in bed.

Could things get any worse?

For distraction, you found yourself singing along to the radio, Black Sabbath, one of Kaye’s favourite bands that you’d grown to like. Hard rock wasn’t your forte, but you’d enjoyed the way you’d grown adept at liking things far out of your comfort zone. So long to the girl who only listened to pop albums, now your mother was concerned you were getting into the wrong crowd when you asked her to buy you an AC/DC record for your seventeenth birthday.

Kaye turned on the road, slowing down as you pulled into the drive-thru, pulling up behind a car full of some soon-to-be junior girls–ordering drinks and snacks for you all to share. That’s when you heard the familiar sound of a truck, your eyes pulling away from the chili cheese fries and toward the rumbling of an engine. None other than Darla and Elise, Shavonne having slipped out of the vehicle and running over to jump into the back beside Sabrina, saying her hellos to you all. She focused on properly introducing herself to the new girl as they indulged in some fries together in the backseat.

You, though, couldn’t pull your gaze away and found yourself in a staring match with Elise. With a clenched jaw, you felt anger course through your veins, a rush of jealousy taking over as your mind swirled with all those ugly thoughts of her and Angus together. Envy. You were morphing into a green-eyed monster.

There was so much pent-up energy in you that you wanted to get out of the car and march on over to confront her. To reveal that even though she appeared so naive and innocent on the outside, she was far from it. Elise was a secret mean girl—at least Darla was a bitch to your face.

“Hey!”

You jumped in your seat and turned to look between the three girls, eyes widening as Kaye took a sip of her Coke and looked between you and the truck that had pulled away from Top Notch. Your short-haired friend was too perceiving for her own good, having witness the entirety of your glaring match with the girls.

“Sorry,” you murmured, looking down at the basket of fries in your hands and deciding to calm yourself with a few bites of the greasy food. You needed to get a grip. You hadn’t even had a sip of alcohol yet, and you were already fearing that tonight you’d be an angry drunk.

“Elise and Darla hate you,” Shavonne said, stealing the large coke from Kaye’s hands, her energy so calm that you wouldn’t have been able to tell that she dropped big news on you two.

“What?” You snapped, spinning in your seat so you were on your knees and facing the two in the back. “What did she say? Shavonne, tell us.”

“I don’t know… you have to promise me you won’t get mad,” Shavonne murmured, blue eyes flickering between everyone, “They said something about both of you,” the blonde shot her gaze over to Kaye, who furrowed her brows in a mix of confusion and semi-offence. Mostly curiosity.

“So, you’re all talking about us behind our backs? I would have never guessed.” Kaye grumbled, though the smile on her lips proved how uncaring she was.

“I’m not saying anything until you promise me that neither of you will get mad,” Shavonne said from her spot, looking between her two best friends.

“I won’t get mad, I don’t care what they think,” you reassured her, eagerly leaning forward to hear the gossip. Kaye agreed quietly, eyes flickering into the rearview mirror.

Shavonne held off on her words for a few moments, slowly sipping from the Coke until she was satisfied and let out a long exhale, “Okay, fine. She said you’re a slut,” she pointed to you, “and she called you a dyke,” ending off her words toward Kaye.

The three of you all stared at each other for a few moments, Sabrina looking rather uncomfortable as she feared that you’d all erupt into anger and this would get worse than it already was. The silence was deafening, the sounds of others at the drive-thru somehow seeming quiet and muffled as the words settled in.

Then, you and Kaye busted into a loud fit of laughter, following shortly by Shavonne and an uncertain Sabrina, who chuckled nervously. She seriously didn’t understand high school drama, and she was already growing afraid at the prospect of it. If someone called her a slut, she’d cry about it for days!

“God, they’re so annoying,” you breathed out through a laugh as you settled back into your seat, only feeling the slightest tinge of anger. Mostly, this relieved you because any ounce of sympathy you had over Elise was gone like the wind.

Sure, it was far from having good morals, but you certainly hoped that you’d be finding yourself with Angus somewhere tonight. Alone, and not so quiet. It’s what you both deserved.

“Did you see how Jason didn’t even say hi to me in class earlier?” Shavonne’s voice was loud over the wind as you girls drove down main street, the radio lowered, “I mean, he walked up to the door and saw me inside and didn’t even acknowledge my existence. He’s such a prick.”

“And here Kaye is trying to tell me that Benny is the worst in school,” you chuckled, glancing back to look at Shavonne, “Jason is a prick, though, he always tries to play hard to get as if you two haven’t been seeing each other all year, like, what’s his deal?”

“Right!” Shavonne exclaimed, taking another drink of the coke that was nearly gone, “And honestly, I’m doing him a favour by sleeping with him. I’m so out of his league.”

“He’s such a weirdo. He thinks being a football player makes him the most popular boy in the school,” you huffed.

“Well, it kind of does,” Shavonne sighed as she deflated into her seat for a moment, only a few seconds later puffing out her chest and sitting up straighter, “Screw him!” She exclaimed, lifting her hands in the air and shedding all worries as she forced herself to cheer out into the night sky. An easy way to uplift her energy. If there was one thing you admired about Shavonne, it was her ability of keeping herself out of the gutter. There was very little that could hold her down, and if it did, it never lasted.

“You tell him,” Kaye chimed in with a big smile, glancing in her rearview when she heard an engine roaring behind–the smile immediately faltering, “Speak of the fucking devil.”

All of you shifted in your seats to look back, seeing Pickford’s car rev up until they reached the same speed as Kaye’s. Inside sat Pickford, Jason, and some boy you didn’t quite recognize that was passing a bong back and forth with Slater in the back seat. Your eyes stared at Jason, narrowing slightly in solidarity with Shavonne’s disappointment.

Jason, who was sitting in the passenger seat, leaned forward to look past Pickford, “Hey, what’s going on?” He asked your group, a smile spread on his lips and completely unaware of the complaining that was going on between you four.

Your eyes lingered on Jason, a brow quirked—severely unimpressed.

“What are you up to?” Shavonne called over, leaning against her door and locking eyes with Jason, a small smile on her lips. You caught her behaviour, holding back the urge to roll your eyes at how coy she was being after just talking bad about him—she was only human.

“Oh, you know, smoking a little weed. Driving around,” he said casually, licking his lips as he focused those eyes on the blonde sitting in the backseat of Kaye’s car, “There might be a beer bust later on, just thought you’d want to know.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Cool,” Shavonne was trying so hard to hide that smile, but it was impossible. Again, you couldn’t blame her, Jason was a really cute guy. Why stay mad, especially on a night like this?

“Do you know where Angus is?” You called over, eyes flickering between Jason and Slater, figuring they were the last to see him. That was enough to garner everyone’s attention, even Pickford removed his eyes from the road to glance at you.

You hadn’t realized that your affairs were so public.

“He’s back at the Emporium, man,” Slater said from his spot in the backseat, hardly able to keep his eyes fully opened and a goofy smile tainting his lips, “Hanging with Wooderson… I like that guy, man.”

You felt your cheeks warm up at the mere mention of his whereabouts, feeling the stare of Kaye from behind you. Couldn’t you have any peace? If Shavonne could immediately forgive Jason for being a bad not-so-boyfriend, then you should be able to lust after Angus freely! She did say you’re allowed to have options.

“Elise better watch her boy,” Jason said through a grin, wiggling his eyebrows at you. Just as he turned to look at Shavonne, his mouth opening to say his goodbyes—

“Check you later!” Slater said in a dorky tone as he snapped his fingers into guns, a big, toothy smile on his lips. Kaye sped up and down the street, you girls all laughing together as you barely heard Jason chastising Slater for ruining it.

“They’re such dorks,” Kaye shook her head, lifting a hand to adjust her rearview mirror, catching Sabrina in it, “How are you like it so far, Freshie?” She asked, both you and Shavonne’s attention landing on her.

“It’s fun,” Sabrina smiled, “I’ve uh, never had a night like this before. Do you drive around like this a lot?”

“Pretty much,” you answered, turning ahead in your seat as you looked down at your nails, too dark to properly inspects your cuticles, “There’s not much to do in the evenings unless there’s a party, so this is better than nothing.”

“We know this whole city like this back of our hand,” Shavonne said, grinning, “Do your best to keep an eye on it all, yeah? Someday, I’m sure you’ll be driving around with a cute boy looking for a place to park for some… alone time.” She nudged the younger girl, Sabrina blushing at the insinuation.

“Shavonne, do not inflict your teenage horniness on this poor freshman.” Kaye reprimanded playfully, turning down a quiet street.

“What? I’m allowed!” Shavonne snarked, smirking over at the younger girl, “Have you even had your first kiss yet?”

Those words caught your attention as you snuck a glance over your shoulder, smiling when you saw how Sabrina’s cheeks were bright red. That alone was enough admission of the truth, and you could only hope that her high school career was less dramatic than your own.

“We meant what we said earlier,” you said as you adjusted yourself, “Make sure you find a nice boy.”

“She was chatting with Tony earlier, asked her to propose to him.” Kaye chewed on her bottom lip, pulling the car through the neighbourhoods that were quiet and still. Families tucked away in their homes after dinner, porch lights flicking off and on to silently beckon their children away from their evening playtime and back inside.

“Tony?” You smiled brightly, knowing that the blonde boy was a friend of Angus’. You’d been invited to play poker with them a couple of times before, only having made it there once, “Now he is a nice boy. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a vulgar word coming from his mouth, you know.”

“Yeah, he seems nice,” Sabrina giggled shyly, tucking some of her curly hair behind her ear, “He’s just… older, though. Do seniors even like freshman?”

You and Shavonne laughed together, finding her words too innocent. She knew absolutely nothing of high school culture, and you were almost certain she didn’t have an older sister. To be this clueless was a nightmare and a half—you experienced it firsthand as the eldest sibling in your family.

“You have no fucking idea,” the blonde snickered, “I’m so glad you’re with us, Sabrina, you have so much to learn.”

The freshman was wide-eyed and looking between you all, “So… they do like freshman girls?”

“Yes, and it’s sickening,” Kaye said, “I might complain about Jason and Benny every day of my life, but at least they date girls their age,” she said, slowing down as she pulled back onto main street and pulled over on the side of the road where a garbage can was–shifting the car into park, “But Tony is actually a decent guy, so I’ll let that slide.”

Shavonne silently knew her assigned task, scooping up the garbage you girls collected over the past hour and hopping out of the vehicle to throw it away. Once back, she lit up a cigarette, settling back into the seat beside Sabrina and exhaling the smoke up into the night sky.

“Yeah, he’s not a pig like Teddy Kountze. You watch out for him, he flunked senior year, so he’s eighteen now and will still be trying to get with the freshman girls,” you warned her carefully, “and he’s a douchebag. There’s nothing good about him.”

Shavonne nodded to your words, passing the cigarette to you, “You know, my dad was twenty-two when he started dating my mom at sixteen,” she looked between you all, “Now that I’m seventeen it gives me the creeps. My dad was Wooderson’s age when they met, that’s messed up.”

“Do you think he’ll be still hitting on the girls when Sabrina is a senior?” Kaye piped up through a laugh, taking the cigarette from you and inhaling.

The freshman, again, look wide-eyed and nervous. It was endearing.

“Don’t worry,” you said to her through a chuckle, “trust me when I tell you that you’ll know who he is when you see him, and you’ll be rightly turned off. I don’t trust the girls that get with him.”

“Didn’t you sleep with him?” Shavonne kicked your seat.

“What? No! I said I thought about it when he asked,” you grumbled, “I have morals.”

“Obviously not enough to stay away from dudes that have girlfriends,” Kaye rebuked, an impish look on her face.

“I resent that baseless accusation,” you snorted, reaching down to put your hand on the gear shift, “Start driving.”

“Shit, I almost forgot to tell you!” Shavonne squealed, sitting forward so she could lean herself between you and Kaye, falling back slightly as the car sped back onto the road, “I heard from a little bird that Elise is thinking of breaking up with Angus.”

“Really?” You murmured, looking over your shoulder at Shavonne, “don’t lie.”

“I swear to god, she told me herself. She said that she’s getting bored, and she feels like she could do better for senior year,” your friend continued, delighted to see your interest, “But I don’t know if she’ll go through with it.”

“Why not?” Kaye piped up, brows furrowing as she listened to the gossip.

“Because she knows that miss love triangle over here has been hanging out with him,” Shavonne smiled, “Darla saw you two driving around last weekend and Elise is pissed.”

“What? There’s nothing illegal about driving around. We’re friends,” you complained, offended.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself, sweetheart, everyone knows that you and Angus have the hots for each other,” Shavonne grinned, “But just know that your little rendezvous are the reason that Elise has decided to hold off on breaking up with him. If you two waited just a few more weeks before spending all the free time you could muster up with each other, he’d probably be all yours for the taking.”

A heavy breath came from you, feeling regret pool inside your stomach and leaving it in a sour pit.

“What a spiteful bitch,” you mumbled under your breath.

“Well, look at it this way,” Kaye started, “if things were getting so boring between them that Elise was wanting to break up with him, then you could probably confront him about it, and he’d break up with her. The only question is, will you?”

Much like a whiny toddler, you pouted in your seat and forced your gaze away from your friends, “Yeah, whatever. I’ll think about it… we need to find some fucking alcohol.”

Kaye pulled onto a road that led past the Recreation Centre, where the freshman were having their own summer kick-off party. Not much of a party than it was a dance being chaperoned by a few parents and teachers, you could even hear the song “Love Hurts” by Nazareth being played loudly from the open doors—poor kids.

Your eyes flickered ahead as Kaye started slowing down, further down the street you saw a vehicle pulled over on the side of the road with its headlights on and the sound of yelling. “What the hell,” you murmured, leaning over the side of your door to look past the windshield. It was Teddy Kountze’s car, cringing when you heard the cries of the boy as a paddle smacked against him.

Jason came walking from around the front of the car where the boy was pushed against a chain link fence, a smile on his face when he saw Shavonne sitting up and looking over at him. However, everyone's attention was faced over to Kountze, who was relentless with his paddling.

“Go easy on him, would you?” You called out, feeling your heart skip a beat when you realized it was Benny holding the other paddle. He turned over to look at you from afar, a smirk on his lips as you tugged your eyes away.

Jason only smiled wider as he walked closer, “Ladies,” he mused, opening the trunk of the car to reveal a sea of beer bottles and cans. He grabbed one of the glass bottles and a bottle cap opener, leaning back against the trunk, just about to open it until you spoke.

“Who’s the kid?” You asked, sitting up in your seat until you were nearly standing and looking overtop the windshield, cringing slightly as you saw Kountze paddling him a few more times, relentless in doing so. You could hear the cracks of the wood against the denim echo, pained cries coming from the kid.

“Oh, the kid there?” Jason hummed, smirking, “Some kid we saw walking around the rec centre that shouldn’t have been there,” Jason bit down on his bottom lip as his eyes focused on the blonde.

You were focused on Benny, who was walking around the car and standing next to Jason, grabbing one of the beers for himself. He was far from the hottest guy you’d ever seen, but you had grown attached to him, whether you realized it or not. That’s why you grinned when he looked at you, biting down onto your lip coquettishly as he returned with a smile of his own. Okay, maybe he was one of the hottest guys you’d ever seen.

There was something about these small town Texan boys that had you flustered.

It was easy to forget about your troubles when you had boys at your disposal, boys who could make you feel good for a night. So the looming responsibilities ahead were far from your mind and instead focused on the pleasure they gave you. That’s what you and Benny were good for each other.

And that’s how it started. A bit of flirting here and there within your first few weeks of arriving at Lee High School, until one day before a football game he came crawling to you with so much pent-up stress. You two had spent the entire night together, not falling asleep until the birds started chirping. That’s why you had to fight the urge to saunter toward him and forget about your worries of Angus, to indulge in what was comfortable for you. Ignoring your future, ignoring how the unknowing scared you.

“Can you give us some of those beers?” Shavonne called out to Jason, a smile on her lips.

“Why?” He grinned, teasing.

“Just give me a beer,” she groaned, her and Sabrina now sitting up on the backs of their seat, looking above you and Kaye.

“Get the fuck out of here!” Kountze’s voice was loud, the paddle smacking against the chain link fence loudly as the kid scurried off toward the cars. He was finally done playing with his food.

As Jason toyed with tossing over a beer to Shavonne, playing with her, he instead turned to the freshman walking past, “Here, catch, kid.” He said, tossing the beer bottle to him and smiling contentedly—it wasn’t by much, but Jason was one of the kinder boys. Not as kind as Angus.

“What did you give him a beer for? You’re wasting beers,” Benny grumbled, cracking open one of the white cans and taking a sip of the foam that nearly spilled out of the opening. His eyes flickered over to you again, smirking from behind his drink as both of you silently agreed on the fact that you’d be seeing each other later.

Far from your thoughts was Angus and the idea of breaking things off with Benny.

Was it so bad to see where things went first?

“This fuckin’ sucks,” Kountze whined, dropping his paddle into the open car door before walking over and picking up a bottle, “Last fuckin’ day of school, no fuckin’ party. No nothin’. Fuck,” as he spoke, his words grew angrier as he tried to open the bottle in his hand. When the cap wouldn’t budge, he huffed and tossed the beer, the glass shattering on the gravel road.

“You just wasted another fucking bee-”

“Shut up.”

In his hands, Jason scooped up four cans of beer, one falling out of his grasp, which Benny managed to catch. As Kountze pouted and drank his beer, leaning up against the trunk of his car, Jason and Benny bringing the rest of you each a drink.

Coming up to the passenger side, Benny leaned against the door and gave you the beer he’d been dangling in his hand, smirking down at you and making you shift in your seat to look at him better. “You’ll be at the Emporium later?” He asked, his hands lifting to adjust the ball cap he wore, fitting it snug over his hair.

“Maybe,” you hummed, cracking the beer open and taking a sip.

“Don’t act like that. Will you be there?” Benny smiled, a low chuckle rumbling from deep in his chest, his hand reaching forward to play with your hair, something he’s never done before. It almost felt… domestic. Like you two were an exclusive item. You were certain he was only acting this way because you’d been distant lately, likely wanting to see more of you, and that treating you this way would make you go crawling right back to him. There was also the thought of jealousy, if others were already talking about you and Angus, you were one hundred percent certain that those rumours would have found their way to Benny.

You wondered if there was a rift in their friendship lately, from what you knew, Angus and Benny were close. They weren’t best friends, but they had spent years growing up together. That alone made you nervous.

“Okay, yeah. Fine. I’ll see you there.” You bit back a smile, setting your beer down into the cupholder between you and Kaye, thankful that the other three were being entertained by Jason the entire time. The last thing you wanted was for your friend to call you out about shamelessly flirting with two boys in one day. Like Shavonne would say—you’re allowed!

“So, who bought you the beer this time?” Your blonde friend asked Jason, only to be rudely interrupted by a car of freshly-graduated boys driving by with music blaring obnoxiously loud.

“Hey, Benny, you idiot!” A voice slurred loudly, one of the boys from the car, “You know I slept with your girl before you did! Sloppy seconds!” They shouted as they tossed a beer can that hit the side of Kaye’s car.

It happened so fast, everyone turning their heads to look at the culprits driving by, eyes wide and in shook.

They were lying, of course, the words spewed only because those boys were drunk and jealous of the football players. Why they were jealous of someone younger, you couldn’t comprehend—boys were weird. You were unfortunately caught in the crossfire, an easy target with Benny’s attention all over you. The words still stung you, though, your cheeks reddening in embarrassment. You felt a hand, Benny’s, press over your shoulder and gently squeeze it. Reassuring and protective.

It was unlike anything you’d experienced with him, and for the first time he’d grounded you. Weirdly, you felt like you could get used to that feeling.

“Bite me!” Kountze yelled out at the boys protectively, earning a ‘fuck you’ as they sped down the road, “Yeah, you wish, asshole!” Kaye chimed in right after, everyone angry and red-faced on yours and Benny’s behalf.

That was something you could check off—Kountze and Kaye standing up for you at the same time. Two sides of very different coins.

Shyly, you reached a hand up to rest over Benny’s, tilting your head back to look at him as you squeezed his fingers, noting the anger that was swirling in his eyes. The anger he tried to control for your sake. This moment was intimate, leaving you a bit breathless and with butterflies swirling around in your stomach.

You were now fully caught in a mess of boys and blossoming love, certain this night wouldn’t end well for one of you. Hell, maybe none.

“Why are guys such pigs?” Shavonne sneered from her seat, looking over her shoulder to where the car had sped off, now only a layer of dust in the air.

“Let’s get out of here.” Kaye murmured, shifting back in her seat and glancing over at you and Benny, motioning for him to move his hand from you, “You okay?”

You nodded at Kaye, swallowing a lump down your throat and shoving away your bruised pride, “I, uh, I’ll see you later, then,” your words were directed to Benny. The mood deflated as you settled into your seat, feeling the boy’s gaze on you as he stepped back. You already yearned for his touch again, but you didn’t dare look over at him because you were pulled back into reality now, much too sober. Likewise, you grabbed your beer and took a long chug.

“Bye, boys!” Shavonne waved the football players off as Kaye pulled away, a smirk on her face as she gave a wink to Jason. Though, Sabrina and her were quick to ask if you were okay, leaving you to smile and nod, wanting nothing more now than to get wasted and forget about everything.

You left it up to Kaye to head to your next destination, can of beer in hand, as you sipped on it and listened to your friends chat amongst each other. Like usual, you had found yourself staring off into the scenery, your mind far from the present and up in the clouds.

Closing your eyes and listening to the radio, you tried to keep your mind from wandering. You focused on your breathing, or how the small bit of alcohol in you had started warming your cheeks. Soon you would be at the Emporium, hopefully able to score some more beer and spend the rest of the night actually having a good time.

This was the last time you would ever let words affect you this much, you promised yourself that.

After driving around for another ten minutes and being overcome with a frustrating amount of boredom, Kaye and Shavonne decided that the Emporium would have better luck. You had forgotten all about Angus being there.

The four of you found yourself standing outside the building while Kaye had a cigarette and the rest of you practiced shooting bottle caps with a snap. Trying to show Sabrina how to do it so it would hit your shoulder. There was a shared feeling of ennui in the air, even radiating out from the inside of the Emporium. Nearly the entire student body had been waiting for Pickford’s party the last month, his house the perfect host for a night of wild teens needing to find relief after a brutal school year.

And there was only so much driving you girls could do in a night and so much beer you could get your hands—you were running out of things to do.

You, especially, could use a party. Somewhere to drink up cups of alcohol and shrug off those nasty words that stuck with you, even after Shavonne berated you for letting it bother you. You were stronger than this, but with your heart confused on what it wanted, and your brain stuck on morals, you were vulnerable.

“This is stupid,” you groaned, tossing the bottle cap in your hand onto the concrete sidewalk and leaning back against the exterior of the building, “Should we go for another drive?”

“I’m sick of driving. Let’s go see if we could score a pool table.” Kaye said, dropping her cigarette to the ground and butting it out with the heel of her shoe.

“And maybe a few more beers,” Shavonne said with a bright smile, likely the only girl in your group that was optimistic about what the night would bring.

As you turned to make your way into the Emporium, none other than Angus Tully stepped out, a cigarette fit nicely between his lips. You looked at his clothing, a purple button up triple his size that was tucked nicely into some white bell-bottoms. The familiar fluttering with your stomach made its appearance again, and long gone were those thoughts of Benny—not when the boy you’d been falling in love with was standing right in front of you.

“Hey,” you grinned, walking over to him and pressing a hand against the wall, “Fancy seeing you here.”

You swore you noticed Angus’ eyes brighten when he saw you, smiling as he pulled the cigarette from between his lips and walked right next to you, followed closely by Wooderson, and surprisingly, your younger brother. Obviously, Kaye and Shavonne weren’t the only girls who invited a freshman. You watched with a smile as he ran past you, eager to see a familiar face in Sabrina.

“You nearly convinced me that I wouldn’t see you tonight,” Angus snickered, leaning against the wall and looking you up and down slowly and with intent, “So, you did end up having the time to finish drying your hair. You, uh, look nice.”

“Thanks, you too,” you breathed out through a giggle, your entire spirit lifting now that he was around, “Did you hear anything more about a beer bust? We’re getting bored.” You motioned a hand back to Kaye and Shavonne, who were standing behind you and focused mostly on Wooderson.

“Ask this man right here,” he smiled, pointing his thumb to the older blonde, who was smiling at you with heavy lidded eyes and a permanent lopsided grin.

“Patience, darlin’, patience.” He hummed, smoking a near-finished joint in his hands, as he took a few steps away and returned the interest in Kaye and Shavonne.

“So, what have you been up to?” Angus asked, looking down at you as he held up the cigarette and a lighter, giving you the first drag if you so pleased. The gesture was small, but it made you so fucking giddy that you had to try to hide your dorky little smile.

“Mostly driving,” you said, putting the cigarette between your lips and lighting in, inhaling the smoke that burned into your lungs, “we ended up running into Kountze, Jason and Benny,” you said, noticing the way he straightened a bit at the mention of the boy you’d been linked with recently, “They were beating on a kid so hard, that one seriously won’t be sitting for weeks.”

“Christ,” Angus chuckled, taking the cigarette you passed to him and inhaling the nicotine he’d been needing, “I feel bad for the freshman boys, you know? Not saying you girls don’t have it bad, but after today they’re all free. All those boys that went running will be hunted for the rest of summer.”

“Aw, did poor Angus get paddled as a freshman boy?” You teased him, seeing the way he empathized, finding it rather sweet.

“Fuck yeah, and it hurt like hell.” He laughed, “I was an idiot and went running on the last day of school. If I could go back and tell myself to suck it up and get paddled on the first day, I would’ve taken ten lickings like a champ.”

You watched Angus with a big smile, chewing absentmindedly on your bottom lip as you stayed attentive, thinking back and wondering what kind of boy he was like when he was young.

“Well, thanks for not being the kind of guy to take this so seriously,” you said, “You’re a nice guy, Angus. Far nicer than those stupid pricks that yelled at me today,” you huffed, “Can’t even enjoy a beer in peace.”

“What happened?” Angus questioned, and you could feel his energy change, like he cared about you—like he was worried.

You found yourself getting shameful about admitting it, though, your cheeks warming up against as you cleared your throat and shrugged, “It wasn’t anything serious.”

“Tell me,” he urged, a serious look on his face, “Who said something? Was it Benny?”

“What? No. It was actually directed at him,” you cleared the confusion, but it didn’t seem to help, Angus’ face contorted in uncertainty, “Jason was giving us some beers after Kountze let the kid go, and Benny and I were chatting then some dudes drove past, drunk as hell, and yelled about how they’d slept with me before Benny did. Or something along those lines, I don’t know, it was really fast, and they were just being douchebags trying to get under his skin. It was a complete lie, I haven’t slept with anyone except Benny–” you were poisoned with rambling, it seemed.

“Are you okay?” Angus interjected, his eyes softening as he noticed your discomfort over the situation. His compassion made you tense up, almost half-expecting him to focus less on the verbal attack that insinuated you were sleeping around, but instead he was worried about how you felt.

“Yeah… I mean, it was pretty insulting, but I’m okay.” You nodded your head, feeling so incredibly small under Angus’ gaze, but safe.

“Some dudes are total pigs,” he huffed, giving you the cigarette that you obviously needed, “hopefully that’s the last time they bother you like that.”

“Thanks,” you said quietly, taking a few much-needed drags from the cigarette, “I won’t let it get to me next time.”

“Good,” Angus smiled, watching you with a look of awe and love on his face, but you couldn’t quite make that out. You were far too oblivious for your own good, “I bet Benny was happy to see you.”

And there it was. You knew it was too good to be true—a night where Angus would forget all about your own ‘relationship’. You were kind at least, keeping your lips tight about his own situation.

“I wouldn’t say he was necessarily any happier to see me than usual,” you chuckled, awkwardly dropping your gaze, “We just hang out from time to time. It’s nothing serious.”

“Are you being honest?”

You looked up, meeting those brown eyes, “What do you mean?”

“Is it nothing serious?” He questioned you, making you feel like there was no one else around you as he fixated on those words. You grew tense, the first time being questioned so analytically by him.

This would have been the perfect time to explain everything, to bring up your feelings for him, and to let him know that you’d call things off with Benny as long as he did the same with Elise. But you could never do things that easily, could you?

“Uh, no. Nothing serious.” Is all you said, shrugging. In the back of your mind, you remembered the way you had grabbed onto Benny’s hand, holding it for reassurance as he was silently there for you. To you, it was nothing serious. To him? Well, you couldn’t be so certain what his intentions were, so technically, you weren’t lying.

“That’s cool,” Angus replied, his eyes dropping as he continued smoking–his mind elsewhere, and you wondered if any of your words actually stuck in his mind. You followed his gaze, looking down at your chest, which was manipulated perfectly by the halter top.

A laugh bubbled up from your throat, “are you staring at my fucking tits?”

“Huh?” Angus was caught off-guard, looking up at you, cheeks pink, “No, not at all,” he was adamant in his answer, exhaling smoke from deep in his lungs as his expression faltered sheepishly, “…yes.”

“Yeah, some dudes are pigs,” you teased, earning a smile and gentle shove against your shoulder from Angus.

Things were cut short, though, your eyes slowly moving past him when you saw two familiar figures walking up toward the doors of the Emporium, your stomach twisting into knots. Darla smiled at Wooderson, giving him a wink as they walked past, Elise, however, was staring daggers at both you and Angus. Whatever nice girl facade she’d managed to play these past few months had completely vanished, you saw her exactly for what she was.

You swallowed a lump down your throat, pulling your eyes away from Elise as she took a drag from her cigarette and walked inside the Emporium slowly, leaving you and Angus standing outside awkwardly. Neither of you dared to bring up the elephant in the room, you were instead waving goodbyes to Kaye and Shavonne as they went inside, following Elise and Darla.

Soon, you, Wooderson and Angus were standing outside, your brother having went in with Sabrina to mingle with their peers. It wasn’t so awkward anymore, having taken up small conversation with the older man.

“So, you lived in California, right?” Wooderson asked you, putting a joint between his lips and inhaling.

“Yeah, Santa Barbara,” you replied, staying close to Angus’ side. You didn’t know Wooderson all that well, but you’d met him twice before today—all you knew was that he was an older guy who loved younger girls. And, he bought you beer once, so you owed him.

“California dreamin’,” he smiled, “bet you miss it, huh?”

“Every day,” you sighed, closing your eyes for a moment and able to instantly take yourself back to the coastal beaches.

You were rudely interrupted by the sound of squealing tires against pavement, opening your eyes to see Teddy’s car come speeding into the parking lot and stopping right in front. You met Benny’s gaze immediately as he stepped out of the car to let Jason out of the back. Though, you were far more perceptive than usual, catching the way his eyes flickered between you and Angus, unimpressed.

“Hey, Slater, you fuckin’ hippie! Give me some drugs, man!” Kountze called from the driver’s seat, his voice making a shiver run down your spine. Even though he’d kind of stood up for you earlier, he was still your least favourite human on this planet.

Slater had been sitting sideways outside of Pickford’s car, the two of them sharing a joint without a care in the world. Until Teddy showed up.

“Get some from your mother, man,” Slater returned wittily. You could see the irritation on his face, it was hard to get a guy like Slater upset.

“We just bagged your mother,” Kountze laughed loudly as Benny got back in the car. He hadn’t acknowledged you other than the lingering stare, and you knew that you’d be confronted by him sooner or later–you tried to ignore it.

“Okay. Fuck you, dick head,” Slater said, waving his hand at them as Kountze pulled out of the parking lot, the smell of rubber on pavement making you nauseous.

“Man of the woods, what’s going on? I haven’t seen you in so long.” Jason grinned, happy to see Wooderson as he ran up to him, greeting him in a way that made you crinkle your nose at their vulgar behaviour.

As you watched the two men catching up, you almost didn’t notice the way Angus’ hand had moved to the small of your back. You snapped your head to look at him, a knowing smile on his face as he looked past you and over to Wooderson. You chewed on the inside of your cheek and leaned into his touch, letting out a content sigh. This felt much too good, like this was normal. You wanted him to be your normal.

“I think I might head inside,” you murmured to Angus, looking up at him and ignoring Wooderson’s rant about younger women—loving the way he got older, and how they stayed the same age. You wished Kaye was outside to hear this, she would’ve jumped at the opportunity to argue with Wooderson about his predatory behaviour, but he would've taken it with stride.

“You sure?” Angus asked, keeping his voice low as he looked over you.

Though, just as you were about to nod to his words, Pickford spoke up, “You guys wanna’ go for a spin?”

“Fuck yeah, shotgun!” Jason quickly snapped his fingers, grinning as he pointed at Wooderson and Angus, “Woods?”

“I’m here, man.” Wooderson replied, content with sticking around the Emporium, likely now that the girls were inside and ready to be flirted with. If you weren’t so disgusted in the twenty-year old’s behaviour, you likely would’ve been right with them and hoping he’d give you the light of day.

This was the best opportunity to usher a quick goodbye to Angus before disappearing and finding your friends, but you were looped right into the action.

“You want to come along?” Angus pulled himself from you, stepping toward the car and grinning, trying his best to entice.

You let out another long exhale, trying to act cool, but you were crazy excited. You hadn’t wanted to go inside to get away from Angus, rather, you were getting bored with standing around and doing a whole lot of nothing. Spending time with Angus? Yeah, you’d say yes to that any day.

“Yeah, why not?” You agreed, stepping alongside Angus and walking toward the car.

“Listen, I’m gonna’ give you shotgun,” Slater said to Jason as he got out of the passenger seat and motioned for the blonde boy to take his spot, eyes so small that you could barely see them. You could tell how red they were, though, “But I want you to know it’s only ‘cause I’m goin’ inside. You keep that in mind.”

Jason smirked, “Okay. Got it, Slate.”

As they spoke, you slipped into the back of the car, sliding into the seat behind Pickford, with Angus settling in right next to you.

You weren’t sure what to expect, this being your first time hanging out with this group of boys, but you were certain that it wouldn’t be short of entertaining. You settled into your seat, sighing quietly as you felt Angus’ hand rest on your thigh, wishing there was no fabric blocking his touch from your bare thigh.

As you felt your heart doing flips in your chest, eyes locked in Angus’ brown ones, you wondered if he felt the same.

#angus tully x reader #angus tully #dazed and confused #the holdovers #dominic sessa #angus tully fic #the holdovers fic #the holdovers au #dazed and confused au #wordsbyspatial

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