Happy self insert day!

I hope self insert day becomes a regular thing! It's so important that people can put themselves in the stories they love without being made fun of for it or fearing that they'll be put into cringe compilations. Fiction exists for enjoyment above all else. Even if I'm more of a writer than an illustrator, and even if I know this could be much better, it's nice to see myself with the characters who mean the world to me. Let people have fun! By some divine chance, this also coincides with the 10th anniversary of the theatrical release of Wall.E. There are so, somany things I could say about what this movie has done to my life. So many people say "I can't imagine what I'd be without _______," and I guess I'm just another one of those saps. There is no part of me that would be remotely the same in a world without this movie. It became a core part of my being the moment I saw it when I was a piddly little ten-year-old (well, as piddly as a five-foot-something, 150 pound kid can be). I'm pretty much convinced I was put on this planet to love this movie. Plus, as the years have gone on, I've only fallen harder and harder for EVE Probes. Roll call under the cut!

From left to right:

Top row: Eve Four (Wall.E, personality and story of my own design); Willow Earthclass (OC, daughter of Wall.E and One); Darwin Harley (OC, obviously still of Bn'L build)

Middle row: Eve One (Wall.E); Fletcher Harley (OC, my dearest child, son of Nos and Two); Nos-4-a2 (Buzz Lightyear of Star Command, redemption arc of my design)

Bottom row: Wall.E (Wall.E, my first sweetheart); me (this bitch of an Earth); Eve Two (Wall.E, personality and story of my own design)

Happy mole day! I’m caught up with Inktober~

Ficlet: Fathers’ Day

:0 Day late Fathers’ Day short.

deviantART | Archive of Our Own | FanFiction.net

“You doing alright?” Two asked in a low voice, putting her hand on Nos’s elbow.

“Oh, yes, I’m fine. Just came out to enjoy a bit of quiet,” the Energy Vampire smiled. They were hovering on the patio outside the Earthclasses’ living room, looking out at the city lights sparkling off the lake. Small boats slipped over the glassy surface, emanating distant music and laughter.

Wall.E and One had built their house on the same spot that the truck once stood, perched at the top of a fortified bridge extending over the water. It was made with a similar style to the towering residential buildings on the shore, with pale stucco walls, red tile roofs, and high, arched windows. The inside was decorated with the best of Wall.E’s collection, flowers growing out of anything that could hold dirt, with even more plant life spilling out of hanging planters. Somehow, as eclectic as it was, the place could never be called “messy.” The Earthclasses managed to maintain enough order to host parties such as the one currently underway, a celebration of the third Sunday of June, Fathers’ Day. The patio where Nos and Two stood was floored with tiles made to look like wood, a glass table with six chairs to one side and a couple overstuffed sofas under an awning to the other, fairy lights illuminating the whole area from above. The coffee table between the sofas was littered with glasses and plates from the human guests who had been out to watch the sunset, some detritus even sitting on the edges of planters filled with colorful succulents.

“You don’t always have to follow me when I disappear at parties, you know. I’d rather you catch up with your friends than sit alone with me.”

“Has it ever occurred to you that I might be disappearing as well?” Two chuckled, leaning against his side. “It always gets a little crazy after Mary’s third glass of wine, anyway.”

Nos gave a short hiss of amusement, putting his arm around her shoulders. “I thought that was half the fun of having parties with humans!”

“I mean, sure, but some of the ‘bots from the Axiom get a little too into it. You should’ve seen the look on poor Michael’s face when Mary started singing and L-T let her use them as a microphone!”

“Oh, is that why everyone went inside?” Nos smirked.

“No, no, I think they started opening presents. That’s actually part of why I came out here... I figured it was a good time to slip away without anyone noticing.”

“Well, shouldn’t at least one of us be there to see Wall.E open the gift we got him?”

“Eh,” Two shrugged, “we’ll get a thank you note either way. I was thinking we might go home soon, anyway... I’m beat.”

Nos-4-a2 hummed and squeezed her side, his hand trailing down to the front of her containment chamber. “You are feeling a bit low. We need to be more careful. It’s not good for your energy to fluctuate now that we have a third party to consider.”

Two smiled and laced her fingers with his. She had only been pregnant for a month and hadn’t started to show it yet, but things were already changing. The nanobots were hard at work processing information and starting to build components; she wasn’t used to how fast it sapped her energy. “The baby’s probably just a speck at this point... I don’t know how it’s managing to drain me like this!”

Nos grinned and kissed the top of Two’s head. “We must have a little vampire on our hands.”

Two’s eyeforms swelled. “Oh wow, I never thought of that...”

“Well, it would make sense. You only became pregnant after you turned.”

“Wow...” Two whispered again, “I wonder if Patrick’s thought of that.”

“Something tells me he would have talked to us about it by now if he had. The man’s a fanatic... I’m sure he’d have some input about it if we asked him at your next check-up, though.”

Two grumbled and pressed her head into Nos’s chest. “I can practically hear the excitement in his voice now. Honestly... just thinking about his high energy is exhausting.”

“Well, we don’t need to worry about that now. Let’s enjoy the view for a bit, just until they’re done with presents. We can say goodbye to everyone after that, and then I’ll carry you home.”

“Really?” Two beamed.

“Of course,” Nos smiled back, “we can’t have you exerting yourself too much! You always make it a race, and I don’t think high speed chases are good for the baby’s development.”

“I only make it a race because you constantly drag behind,” Two scoffed.

“Oh, is that so?” the tall robot drawled, “Then maybe it would be faster to fly yourself home after all!”

“No! I mean ‒ I guess I can put up with it for now.”

Nos laughed and rolled his optic, leaning forward against the railing and rubbing the dip in Two’s side. It was truly a spectacular view, and the cool breeze rolling off the water made the scene all the nicer. Two relaxed against him and watched the patterns in the water, the waves far below lapping steadily towards the shore. Sometimes it moved as the wake of a boat or the ripples from a fish breaching the surface, but it still seemed regular, mathematical. Two had to catch herself to stop from drifting off, so comfortable under her husband’s touch, surrounded by the muffled sound of celebration and chattering behind them and distant music from passing boats. She fantasized about the soft bed waiting for them at home, cuddling into Nos-4-a2’s metal and sleeping the night away. Two actually started to doze off when one of the french doors that led to the patio opened wide, bursting with the sound of the party.

“Oh! Dad, I found him!”

Nos and Two looked back to greet Willow, who floated over the threshold with her father making his way through the crowd behind her. Some people watched Wall.E curiously, but most were so invested in their current conversations that they just squeezed out of the way to let him through. He had to turn sideways and shuffle on his treads to make it past some of the tighter spots, but he eventually made it through the door and out to the patio.

“Thanks, Willow. Could you tell Momma we need her out here?”

Willow nodded and darted off, hovering over the crowd to find One.

“Sorry, were you looking for me? I didn’t mean to be hard to find,” Nos turned fully away from the railing to face Wall.E. The short compactor sported a fresh coat of yellow paint and a vividly patterned bowtie around his neck, gifts from his wife and daughter respectively.

“No, it’s fine! Better that we’re outside,” Wall.E looked back over his shoulder to make sure they weren’t being listened to, dropping his voice, “We know you haven’t told everybody you’re expecting yet, but we got you something for Fathers’ Day.”

“What? You really didn’t have to, we ‒ we hardly told you a week ago! How’d you have the time? Besides, I’m not a father yet,” Nos-4-a2 stammered.

Wall.E’s optics lifted, the covers of his lenses conveying a grin. “Then happy ‘Almost-a-Father’s Day.’ Come sit down, nobody will be able to see us over here...”

Nos and Two followed Wall.E to the sofas, taking seats across from him. One came outside almost immediately after with a package in her hands, Willow following and making sure the door shut behind them.

“Oh, good! I was worried you’d left,” One smiled.

“Without saying goodbye? Come on,” Two laughed, shaking her head.

“I’ve been distracted! But it doesn’t matter. Here,” she handed the package to Nos before hovering back to lean on the sofa, absentmindedly taking Wall.E’s hand while Willow bounced onto the cushion next to her dad.

“This is really too kind. What could you possibly have gotten me though?”

“The point is to open it and find out,” Willow snickered.

Nos smirked, “All right, smart aleck.”

The package didn’t have a bow, simply wrapped in blue and white striped paper. Nos used his talons to tear it away and reveal a book with hard-backed binding in a featureless, deep green. The book was light and wider than it was tall, a silk ribbon lining the spine.

“It’s beautiful,” Two murmured, leaning over Nos’s side.

“Open it up!” One gestured, giddy.

Nos lifted the cover, still not sure what to expect, and found it was a scrapbook entirely empty besides a single, official looking image of white coding on a black backdrop with a date stamp along the bottom from the previous month. The Energy Vampire’s expressive optic opened as wide as it could. Under the picture was a handwritten caption: “Baby’s first line of code.”

His voice was hardly louder than a whisper. “Is this...?”

“It’s a baby book,” Wall.E answered.

With Nos and Two still staring, awestruck, One continued, “I visited Patrick at work the day after you told us the news. When I asked him if he could give us anything we could put into a baby book for you, he printed this off right away and told me it was the first sign he had that Two was pregnant. What do you think?”

Nos-4-a2’s smile stretched all the way across his face, his silver fangs glittering under the fairy lights. “I... this is the most thoughtful gift I’ve ever received... thank you!”

Two nodded vigorously, covering the base of her visor in her hands, keeping herself from speaking in case she started to cry.

“Oh, I’m so glad you like it!” One chirped.

“Of course,” Nos traced the jumble of characters on the paper with the pad of his finger, trying to hide the fact that he had oil building in his optic.

“We know your baby isn’t here yet, but that doesn’t make them any less real. If you ever need anything, advice, planning, whatever you can think of, we hope you’ll come to us,” Wall.E nodded.

Nos could only bring himself to say “thank you” again, lacing his arm around Two and hugging her to his side. One, unable to contain herself at having elicited an emotional response from Nos-4-a2, hovered forward to hug him as well.

“Happy Fathers’ Day, Nos!”

Obviously, I would have preferred to post this yesterday, but I was distracted at a huge Fathers’ Day celebration with my own clan! I probably could have had it done if I had just written what I had originally planned, a super short story where Two woke Nos up with a fancy power cell and a kiss for Nos’s “first” Fathers’ Day after she’s pregnant, but I’m trying to expand my scenery a little. I don’t know if it’s as obvious to you guys as it is to me, but a LOT of my stories happen while the characters are either waking up or getting into bed. I guess one of my greatest fantasies is just being cozy... Headcanon: The rogue robots, the Ratzenbergers (John, Mary, and their immediate families), the Earthclasses, and the Energy Vampires are all basically one big family who gets together for every little occasion. Others, including but not limited to the McCreas and the Henrys, are considered part of the extended family and always make it to at least one gathering a year, usually Christmas. Also, for the Earthclasses’ house, I decided to create a description based on this shot. I know it shows the truck on the end of the bridge, but this is already a crossover AU... so I don’t feel too bad twisting the canon a little. Wall.E and One are grown adults with a growing family who need a roomy house! They keep all the knick-knacks they couldn’t fit into the decor in a storage unit and the truck itself is kept as a historical monument in a local museum.

Lost Cause

Savy has earned the right to confront her biggest adversary... or at least, she would be able to if anything made sense. deviantART | Archive of Our Own | FanFiction.net

Savy SL2 braced herself for landing as her space cruiser approached solid Earth...

...Outside, she saw nothing but sprawling grass fields painted gray by the moonless night. This was the place... at least, she hoped it was. Ever since she first joined the Junior Rangers, Savy had dreamed of this moment. This time, she had a plan to bring Nos-4-a2 down. Of course, she had worked through a lot of the plan already. It had taken her years to get this far ‒ everything concerning the Energy Vampire seemed to be shrouded in several layers of classification. If this didn’t work out, she was facing serious consequences. That had made things much more difficult, since she had originally wanted to find Nos-4-a2 with her whole team beside her, but wasn’t willing to endanger the rest of their careers. It had been a tough decision considering how confident Savy felt. After reviewing everything, she was certain that Nos-4-a2 had somehow managed to trick the system into registering him as a reformed villain. It would give the slippery Energy Vampire the perfect chance to run away to the edge of galactic nowhere and run his base of operations undisturbed. Knowing him like she did, Savy knew there couldn’t be any way his case file was correct. How could the monster responsible for so much terror be reformed? She’d fought him herself ‒ in fact, she’d come pretty close to finishing him off. Now he was supposed to be under planet arrest on good behavior? During her years in the academy, the only thing that got her through the grueling training was the thought of bringing villains like Nos-4-a2 to justice. From the moment she gained rookie status, she scoured every database she could to find information on the Energy Vampire’s whereabouts, always coming up empty. She had been promoted to a full Ranger before she uncovered the high-security Shiv Katall files, and though she doubted he would actually be living at whatever location he fed to the system, it was her only lead. She packed her bag with high-tech stealth gear so the Energy Vampire wouldn’t be able to sense her if he was around. Savy lept out of the cruiser’s hatch and into the waist-high grass. She left her helmet up, a shock of her navy blue hair resting on her forehead. She couldn’t afford to take time acclimating to Earth’s thick atmosphere, but she could feel the breeze through her form-fitting Pulsar suit. She opened a panel on her right wrist to check her positioning system. The reported address was just over the crest of the hill before her. Chills ran up her spine as she walked, her eyes shining, her breath becoming quick and heavy. As she hiked up the slope, a spire gradually came into view atop a ghostly white tower. Her heart jumped into her throat ‒ maybe he lived here after all. It only seemed more likely as she drew closer and closer, more of the mansion coming into her view. As she reached the top of the hill, the only thing that gave her pause for thought were the elaborate gardens making a wide circle around the base of the structure. Nos-4-a2 was notorious for hating plant life, but she wouldn’t let that stop her. In fact, it only made her more sure he was inside: the gardens were probably meant to throw off anyone who got this close to finding him. Passing through a gap in the outer wall of hedges, she silenced her steps in the grass next to the gravel path and wound closer and closer to the outer wall of the mansion. As quietly as she could, she took a tablet out of her pack and activated the radar, skirting the footpath against the wall. Her heart pounded. Nos-4-a2 was certainly there. It took a moment for her vision to clear enough to notice that he wasn’t alone. The scanner registered at least six other robots and a powerful security system. Savy picked up her pace a bit without thinking. Were they prisoners, slaves, or allies? She couldn’t shake the thought that whoever they were, they hadn’t been with him to begin with. They could be somebody’s friends, or siblings, or parents... She broke into a jog beside the path, her eyes trained on her radar, making sure that she stopped to duck under the windows as she came close to the room Nos-4-a2 occupied. Hands trembling, she slipped her bag off her shoulder, taking out a set of sensory equipment. Savy was sitting in a flower bed not thirty feet from the Energy Vampire. She picked out the microphone and gingerly reached up to press it against the glass, waiting until the blood stopped rushing in her ears before she put on the headset. His voice still made her veins turn to ice. The accent of the strange, overlapping tones hadn’t changed since the last time she heard it. “Come closer, little one.” Her gut lurched. Was she listening to a feeding? Savy made sure she was recording, determined to take back enough evidence to make up for the fact that she broke the law in order to get it. “No.” Savy’s heart skipped a beat. What? Was that whoever Nos-4-a2 had been addressing? It sounded like a robot, but how could that be possible? What robot could have opposed the creature responsible for overpowering and destroying so many machines before it? Nos-4-a2’s voice came again, “Really, you’re taking up most of the couch, and the movie’s starting soon. There’s hardly any room.” “You’re going to have to move me, then.” Savy stared, unseeing, at the white wall in front of her. She heard a gentle scraping and clinking of fabric and metal, laughter, and a short sigh. “There, and isn’t this more comfortable?” Savy couldn’t help herself. What the hell could possibly be going on? That couldn’t really be Nos-4-a2, could it? She chanced a peek over the windowsill, keeping her faith in the cover of darkness. It looked like a living room, which didn’t help her make any more sense of the situation. She saw the Energy Vampire sitting in an overstuffed sofa, holding a white probe in his lap and facing a large holographic projection of a movie’s opening credits. As if on cue, the other robots she’d registered on her scanner started to come into the room, but they couldn’t have looked any less like prisoners or slaves. There was one robot identical to the one in Nos-4-a2's lap with blue eyeforms; a yellow unit on treads with optics like a pair of polished silver binoculars; a smaller, white, cube-shaped robot with treads and glowing blue lenses in its binocular optics; a humanoid robot with yellow eyeforms in its black visor; and a short, hovering probe frighteningly similar to Nos-4-a2. It looked like... a family. The last robot made a face at Nos-4-a2 and the probe in his lap. “Can you not be gross tonight?” “That depends. Does this count?” the Energy Vampire turned the robot in his lap to place an overdramatic kiss on her visor, drawing laughter from the other probe and the yellow unit, while the three smaller robots gagged and sat as far away as possible. Savy gaped like a fish out of water, a million thoughts going through her head and none of them quite connecting. Her mind flooded with memories of Nos-4-a2 during their last encounter, a personification of feral and mechanical fury. Had somebody taken the empty shell of Nos-4-a2 and programmed another personality into it as some sort of divine prank? She had to do something... talk to someone... suddenly, her feet were carrying her back to her cruiser as fast as she could go. There was only one person she could think of who might know something, or at least sympathize with her, someone who had enough experience with Nos-4-a2 to understand why she had risked so much to find him. Savy stumbled into her cruiser and activated the communication panel, punching a code into the board. There were only a few tones before a robot with a cylindrical, golden head and optics like purple goggles answered, a stiff, silver mustache bolted to his face. “Savy? Where have you been? Your crew hasn’t seen you in days!” The young ranger was still catching her breath as the words tumbled from her mouth. “What do you know about Nos-4-a2? Like, where he is right now?” XR’s face contorted into a scowl. “Knowing anything about him is too much for my taste. Why do you ask?” “Do you know a-anything about Shiv Katall?” “...Savy, I don’t know where you heard that name, but you’d be much better off forgetting about it. It’s way above your paygrade. I know you have a history with Nos-4-a2, but we don’t know anything about his current whereabouts. Is that clear?” “Sir, please, I ‒ I found him, I’m on Earth, I don’t understand!” Something in the robotic ranger’s expression softened at the tone of her voice. “I know. Now, listen... if you swear to me that you’ll leave that planet right away and never tell anyone what you’ve found out, I’ll tell you whatever you want to know. For now, keep in mind that there haven’t been any reports concerning Nos-4-a2 in years. As far as the Galactic Alliance is concerned, he’s dead. Make your way back out as soon as possible.” “That’s ‒ that’s it?” “For now, yes. It’s not hard to guess what you went out there to find, but you won’t have any luck. You’re risking a lot more than you know just by being out there.” “...Yes, sir. I’m sorry.” “Fine, but I expect you to report back as soon as possible. Captain out.” Savy, numb, activated the ship and turned on the autopilot. She collapsed into the chair at the main controls and buried her face in her hands, wondering blankly at the tears that pooled in her palms.

What do you think is more likely? 1) Savy was so careful and well prepared that she managed to avoid super-security-system Quinn’s detection, or 2) Quinn was watching Savy very carefully the whole time and just wanted to see what would happen next.

I’m low-key obsessed with the idea of someone seeing/hearing Nos-4-a2 and assuming the worst only to find out he’s a major domestic dork. I’ve thought and written about a similar scenario many times, but this is the one I’ll give you. At the same time, I struggle a little with trying to make sense of Nos-4-a2’s situation and how people he used to know would respond to him now. In the cartoon, he’s a villain. It’s funny. You know he’s not going to win, you’re just there to hear his one-liners and banter before the good guys take him down. My problem is trying to translate that to the real world. Even if his acts were taken relatively lightly in the show, he was the robot equivalent of a serial killer. I have to specify “robot equivalent” because though they are widely treated as equals, robots are subject to different laws, and Nos-4-a2 never caused permanent harm to an organic creature. If any of his victims were found (and many were), they could be restored, but that doesn’t erase the fact that he killed them. He made Savy an orphan (again), even if it was only temporary. That’s not something she’ll ever forget, and though Nos is able to adjust to domestic life with the help of Two, his past life haunts him to the end of his days.

On a lighter note, I wanted to pay homage to that one episode where Zurg tricks Buzz into thinking he was worm-holed into the future, where he sees a plaque in memoriam of Commander Booster, President Nova, and XR... with a mustache. Like, Zurg probably didn’t think Buzz would believe XR would amount to anything more than just getting a mustache tacked onto his face. I can’t for the life of me get a screencap, but it’s basically the same one Commander Nebula has.

Vampirism Chapter 6

deviantART | Archive of Our Own | FanFiction

Rating: General Words: ~1,900

*sheepishly shuffles in and posts this a year and a half after chapter 5* This chapter was originally going to have another scene, and I’ve been hanging onto it for months trying to figure it out. I finally figured it would make more sense to have the last scene be the first scene of the next chapter, so it’s finally here! Nos continues to take a mental and emotional beating, and we get to see some familiar faces.  ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

With his sensors dulled to ignore the rest of the hospital, Nos-4-a2 felt like the entire universe was limited to his immediate surroundings. In front of him sat the long, low nanotherapy chamber, its contents swirling silver under the artificial light, unchanging over the passing hours. Across from that sat the heavy door, muffling the sound of people moving through the halls. Behind him, the curtains covered the world outside, blocking the progress of the storm. Even his thoughts seemed to come to a grinding halt, numb with waiting, tired of imagining every possible scenario. The day had completely wasted away before the outside world came crashing in.

A quiet knock was his only warning before a star-struck Morgan opened the door. “You have some visitors!” Nos leapt from his seat as if it had thrown him. “What ‒ how did you? What are you doing here?!” Coming over the threshold were none other than Wall.E and One. Without a beat of hesitation, One dashed across the room, gave Nos a quick hug, and started looking him over appraisingly. The Energy Vampire could hardly believe what he was seeing. “We called a car right after you hung up.” Nos’s jaw dropped. “You’ve been on the road for... for seven hours?” Wall.E nodded. “The weather’s still too bad to fly in.” “Of course it is! I wasn’t expecting to see you for days!” “What, and not be here when Two came around?” One shook her head. “But you’ve even beaten Darickson! And... and what about Willow?” “Willow’s staying with a friend for a while, and she can stay longer if she needs to,” One assured. “Patrick, on the other hand, we haven’t heard from.” At this point, the only person who looked more stunned than Nos-4-a2 was Morgan. They still had enough of their wits about them to chime in, “Dr. Darickson should be here within the hour, he called right before you arrived, M-Mr. and Mrs. Earthclass.” Nos-4-a2 hardly reacted, his heart sinking like a stone, as Wall.E finally made his way around to clasping his hand in greeting. All he could think was that now, if something were to go wrong, he’d have to face the devastation of the only other people in the world who might love Two as much as him. At least that would take the pressure off of him having to be the one to deliver any bad news... but the twinge of relief that afforded him was immediately flooded out by cold guilt. “Nos?” Wall.E tilted his optics down, peering up with perceptive lenses. “...Sorry,” Nos blinked and shook his head to clear his mind. “I just can’t believe you’re here.” The yellow unit gave him an understanding look that somehow conveyed the world. They hadn’t just come for Two. They were here for him as well. One was already in action, though judging by how strained her signal felt, she hadn’t been at rest in a long time. “Excuse me, while you’re here... Morgan, right?” The human’s eyes swelled. “Yes. Yes! Is there anything I can do for you? It’s, it’s such an honor to meet you, I ‒ ” “Please, it’s nice to meet you too, but my sister...” the look in One’s eyeforms made something inside Nos churn. He dropped his gaze while Morgan spluttered, trying to compose themself and properly explain how Two’s injuries had been repaired. He tuned the conversation out before they started to explain the... remaining concerns. Nos took his seat again and ran his hand over his face, willing that no one noticed the tremor in his motors. For all the things he hadn’t expected, Wall.E and One showing up out of nowhere ranked high on the list. “I-I’ll go get another chair for you, alright? Is there anything else you need? It’s no trouble; anything to make you more comfortable,” Morgan went on after briefing One. “Just the chair would be nice, thanks.” “I’ll be right back! If you think of anything else, let me know right away!” One gave a vague smile and a tone of affirmation. When Morgan backed out of the room, a small group of staff scattered, pretending they hadn’t been waiting at the door. A robot in the group giddily grabbed Morgan and dragged them off while another human nurse held the door, slowly easing it closed. He nodded in an attempt at passive greeting, but he couldn’t conceal the stars in his eyes. Wall.E waved back as he always did while One turned away. Wall.E’s attention went to One as soon as the door closed. He pulled the armchair from the corner so that it was next to Nos at the side of the nanotherapy chamber, gesturing for her to take it. Nos kept his gaze forward, scrutinizing the same spot he thought Two’s visor might be under the silver gel. One was looking at him ‒ he didn’t need to sense it. Due to the shapes of their frames, the way an EVE Probe sat put their head at roughly the same level as Nos’s when he sat relaxed. As slouched as he was under his stress, his elbows on the arms of the chair and his hands folded in front of his face, she’d have to be looking down at him. “Nos-4-a2,” her voice was soft... practiced. “How are you?” He met her eyeforms then, if only for a moment. She shared Two’s natural talent of evading his sensors without trying, a serious inconvenience in his effort to make heads or tails of what she was thinking. Nos could only shrug, shaking his head. “Probably not much different than you’d expect a man to feel when his wife has a brush with death.” “...She really would have died?” He turned his head, holding her gaze this time. “You think I would have done this if it weren’t a matter life or death?” “O-of course not,” One shuddered. Wall.E put his hand on her side. “I... there’s something else, though. Something you don’t want to talk about, but something that only you know. Morgan said they expect Two should be fine, but you look like you’re expecting... worse.” “Anyone would look terrible after the night I’ve had.” Her eyeforms became more narrow. “I know this is hard, but,” she had to collect herself, scrounging for words. “That’s my sister, Nos-4-a2. My only sister... the only sister I have left ‒ ” “Please,” Nos interrupted. His voice was hoarse. “It’s been a long night, but she’s out of the woods now. Dr. Darickson will be here soon.” Wall.E put his hand on One’s side, giving Nos another perceptive look. “But... you’re lying.” A heavy silence passed that added even more weight to Nos’s shoulders. He wanted something to happen, anything to take the attention off him. He struggled to find something that would convince them that he was just tired, just stressed, just in shock, but he must have already shown something on his face. Wall.E, in stark contrast to EVE Probes, was as easy to read as a robot could be. Nos could feel that there wouldn’t be anything he could say to change the unit’s mind. “I... can’t.” “You can’t what?” One asked. Nos paused, looking at the silver gel beneath the glass. “I can’t know. There’s so much that could happen, but I can’t... think of all of it. What if she’s fine, but she wants to change back? There’s no way... what if she can’t stand it? What if she wakes up with no will of her own? What if she only acts the way I expect her to while she’s really trapped in her own mind? How will we be able to tell? I can’t predict what will happen, and I feel... I just,” he held his head in his hands, “I might go mad, I don’t know what I’ll do if ‒ what if she would rather have died?” His voice had thinned to a whisper as he lost the ability to stop himself. Wall.E and One had every right to know ‒ they were the only other people in the world who had as much to lose as he did, but he couldn’t even look at them. He didn’t have a life without Two, he wouldn’t consider it, not until there was no going back. When he spoke again, his voice was thick with static. “I just know too much. Thinking too hard. She’ll... she’s fine.” One didn’t say anything. Nos hadn’t noticed the sound of the room before, but now, the low thrumming of the nanotherapy chamber, the clicking of their own machinery, and the foot traffic in the hall were crushing. The sound of Wall.E’s treads as he moved to Nos’s side could have been heard from two rooms over. The Energy Vampire didn’t look up when the compactor’s silver hand touched his forearm. “...You’ve done everything you can.” Nos-4-a2 clamped his hands harder over his face, trying to hear nothing but the straining of his own motors. He wanted to blink out of existence, unable to stop sensing the other’s feelings ‒ there was a lot to it, many shades of understanding and his own pain, but mixed in was something almost like pity. The situation all but defused when the door opened. Morgan, more flustered than ever, had an armchair on a dolly and a mousy-haired man following close behind them. Nos-4-a2 looked up, his arm falling away from his brother-in-law’s. “Patrick,” he sighed. The doctor flashed a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, fixing his thick glasses on the bridge of his nose. He was short and gangly, his white coat hanging from his too-broad shoulders, the lines under his eyes nearly meeting the early wrinkles at the corners of his mouth. Nos stood, crossing the room in a flash and bending down a bit to clasp Darickson’s hand and shoulder. “I can’t thank you enough for rushing up here.” “Don’t worry about it,” the human clapped Nos’s shoulder in return. “How are you holding up?” Nos’s hands tensed and he pulled away. “Seeing you is certainly a relief.” Darickson’s eyes had hardly left Nos-4-a2’s face when he caught sight of the Earthclasses and his mouth fell agape. “Wall.E, One! How long have you been here?” “Not long at all, actually,” One spoke. She sounded... distant. Darickson laughed half-heartedly. “You’ll make me look bad, beating me to my own patient,” he turned to Morgan, “But I have you and Dr. Watanabe to thank for allowing me the time to travel up here. Considering the circumstances, I think you’ve given Two the best possible chance for recovery.” “Dr. Watanabe?” Nos-4-a2 asked. “Yes, she’s been with other patients from the storm since they started coming in, but she’s the head of the nanorobotic reconstruction ward. She gave Two clearance for treatment before I had the chance to contact her about the urgency of the situation – there are only five of these rooms on location.” Nos grimaced. That explained why this ward felt like the hospital’s epicenter of devastation. “We actually do have people waiting for these rooms, so if you would confirm Two’s readings for me, Doctor, we’ll be able to move her into another room and bring her online.” Darickson started scanning a tablet of Two’s system diagnostics before Nos could decide how he felt about bringing her online. The time had finally come to see if it had worked and Nos-4-a2 couldn’t feel anything.

To this day, Vampirism remains my longest plot-important piece in terms of Nos and Two’s relationship. I think this may have been the first story I ever started writing for this couple, back when I was in seventh grade. :’> It’s nothing like the original draft, of course, and I have yet to write its ending. There’s still a ways to go! Here’s hoping I get the next chapter done before February 2020.

Ficlet: Crabby

Word count: 423

deviantART | Archive of Our Own | FanFiction.net

“Hey, uh, Wall.E? Could you get that?” One called as a tone rang from the video console. She was arranging an elaborate bouquet on the coffee table in the middle of their living room, fluttering around to straighten things out. She was in preparation mode and had even coaxed Willow into helping.

Wall.E smiled and nodded, treading across the room to answer it. The screen flickered to life with a video feed of a tall, angular robot in a deep purple cloak. “Nos-4-a2! How are you?” “I am well, thank you, but I’m afraid I have bad news. We’re not going to be able to make it to the party tonight.” One looked up from her flowers. “Is everything alright?” “No need to worry, Two’s just feeling a bit under the weather.” “That’s one way to put it, asshole.” Nos-4-a2 gave a nervous laugh. “Willow is in the room, love.” The short hybrid turned to the screen, realizing she was in the shot. She shuffled to the side and giggled, “I don’t mind, Aunt Two!” One gave her a pointed look and Willow put up her hands in surrender. “So what happened?” “Well, despite the fact that Eve ‒ sorry, Two ‒ has been given a doctor’s order to take it easy until the baby comes, she insists on working in the garden. She’s simply overexerted herself.” “This is your fault! Admit it, coward!” “Quinn is taking care of her repairs, but she needs to rest and run diagnostics tonight.” “I’m fine you dick!” Nos winced and turned around. “Eve, please! Language.” “That’s not what you said last night ‒ ” “OKAY!” Nos whipped back toward the screen, a frantic smile on his face. “Terribly sorry to have to cancel at the last second, give everyone the best from us, we’ll see you again soon!” The video feed cut out. Wall.E blinked, shook his head and laughed. “Would it be terrible to say I’m relieved?” One laughed as well. “I remember being where Two is now. I’d move heaven and Earth for her, but I can hardly stand being around her like this! I was never that bad when I was carrying Willow.” Wall.E made a noise almost like a cough. Willow looked between them before skirting out of the room. “What does that mean?” “No, Evah, it’s nothing...” “Wall.E.” “I have nothing but respect for you bringing our child into this world and have vowed to stand by every death threat you made during your pregnancy, including the ones against me.” “Wall.E!”

...He's not wrong. The prototypical versions of the reproductive program were far from perfect, taking over a year to complete and containing many bugs. In One's defense, she was essentially a test subject as one of the pioneering users. Two, on the other hand, has no excuse for not educating herself and getting pregnant while she still had the old, faulty programming.