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hangovercurse · 3 years

Text

Loveless

Rook realizes he made a major mistake, but is it too late to win you back?

Rook Cappelletty x reader

Warnings: Cursing

A/N: I wrote this while listening to Loveless by PVRIS

Word Count: 2439

You and Rook had been all over each other all night, as per usual. Ever since you’d met a few months ago, you had been attached at the hip. You couldn’t call what you were doing a relationship, because you’d never really talked about it, you were just kind of hooking up… exclusively. And making out at parties, and clubs, and anywhere else where you ended up together. Rook wasn’t exactly the settle down type, and everyone knew it, which was why everyone was shocked when he asked you to join the last leg of their tour with Young Thug.

You didn’t know what to make of it at the time, but you went with it, spending 2 weeks traveling with the crew and spending almost every waking second with Rook. It was a nice fairytale to live in for a little while, and you could almost convince yourself that maybe he harbored the same feelings for you that you felt for him.

You guys were out at a club in LA, celebrating the final show of the tour. Rook had his hands and lips on you almost all night, and you were loving every second of it. “Babe, I gotta pee.” You mumbled as his lips pressed sloppy kisses down your neck. He groaned, continuing his path. “I’ll only be gone for like 2 minutes.”

“Fine.” He stood back up, letting you go, “But hurry up, I’m gonna miss you.” You rolled your eyes, turning to walk towards the hallway when he grabbed your hand and spun you around. His lips moved against yours in a very hot kiss.

You smiled against his lips, reaching your hands to his chest, and gently pushing him away. “I’ll be right back.”

The line ended up being longer than you expected, though you shouldn’t have been surprised. 10 minutes after you left him, you returned to where your date had been standing, only to find him missing. You searched the room, only to find no sign of him anywhere. You did, however, spot the 6’4” lanky giant that was his best friend, so you made your way through the club to him. “Kells, have you seen Rook?” You yelled over the music.

Colson shrugged, looking over the crowd for the brown-haired boy. You saw his eyebrows furrow in confusion and he looked down at you. “It might be better if I tell you I didn’t see him.” Colson shouted back to you.

“What does that mean?” You asked, looking behind you and standing on your tiptoes. Your question was answered when you saw his tongue shoved down another girl’s throat. Suddenly your good mood faded, and your throat went dry. You fought the sting behind your eyes and sighed, turning back to Colson. “Never mind.”

He looked at you with pity in his eyes, “Y/N, I’m so sorry.”

You shrugged, “It’s whatever. I mean it’s not like we’re together.” You tried to hide the fact that you were dying inside.

“Right…” Colson trailed off, obviously not believing you.

“I’m gonna get going, I’ll see you later.” He nodded, pity still in his eyes. You squeezed through the crowd of people and finally got out the door. You ordered an uber while you leaned against the building, taking deep breaths to calm your racing heart. You couldn’t get the image of him with another girl out of your head. You felt so utterly stupid.

The next day you were laying on your couch, watching old TV shows on Netflix and trying to ignore the clawing in your heart. A knock on your door pulled you away from the TV, and you paused the episode. You weren’t expecting JP Cappelletty to be standing at your door, a smile on his face. “I’m bored.”

You tried your best not to scoff and roll your eyes, but the annoyance on your face was obvious. “I’m busy.”

His eyebrows furrowed, arm reaching to grab your waist. “What’s wrong, babe?”

You pushed his arm off of you, moving away from him. “Nothing. Don’t call me babe.” Your hand grabbed the edge of the door. “Look, J, I’m really busy right now.”

“Yeah, really looks like it.” He said, sarcastically, as he looked past you to see the TV. “Y/N what’s up?”

You let out an annoyed sigh as he took another step closer to you. “Why are you here?”

You saw the confusion in his eyes, “because I wanna hang out with you. We haven’t really gotten to be alone in like 2 months, we were on the tour bus whenever you were with us.” His hands reached to grab yours, but you pulled them towards your stomach and out of his reach.

You rolled your eyes, “we could’ve been alone last night but you were busy.” There was definitely venom in your voice, but Rook didn’t seem to understand why.

“Yeah, but I’m not busy right now.” He smiled, and you scoffed in disgust. “What?” He asked as if he couldn’t grasp why you were upset.

“Are you serious right now?” You asked, studying him as he shrugged. “Okay, JP. I need to know what I am to you, because I thought we were one thing but apparently I’ve got it all wrong.”

You really didn’t understand his confusion at the question, “We’re friends? I don’t know. I like messing around with you, I guess.”

You bit your tongue to hide the pained expression on your face. “God I’m such a fucking idiot.” You mumbled under your breath, walking away from him.

“Y/N, come on? You didn’t think this was a serious thing, did you?” He asked, as if you were the one in the wrong.

You turned to look at him, glaring at him. “You think I wouldn’t think this was serious? You brought me on tour for fuck’s sake, Rook! You don’t invite the person you’re screwing around with on tour if you’re not at least a little serious about it.”

“Y/N its really not that big of a deal.” His face was emotionless, and you were convinced that he had no emotions.

“Maybe not for you, Rook, but it was everything for me.” You were trying really hard not to cry.

He let out a dry laugh, shaking his head at your pathetic image. “You know I’m not like that, I don’t do the whole commitment thing.”

“Yeah, clearly.” You ran a hand through your hair. “Just get out.”

“What? Why?”

“Because, you asshole, I fell in love with you and you couldn’t give two shits. I’m done. Go fuck around with someone else.” You pushed him towards the door, tears starting to fall down your face. You felt utterly humiliated.

Rook stood in the doorway, studying you. “What did you think was gonna happen? You’d change me? I was gonna just magically fall in love with you? You’re smarter than that.”

You glared at him, watching as he walked away, closing the door behind him.

A month and a half later you found yourself at a house party thrown by none other than Machine Gun Kelly himself. Even though you hadn’t spoken to Rook, Colson had checked in on you every so often, making sure you were okay.

And you were, surprisingly. You realized that it was probably for the best that you had cut ties with Rook, even if it hurt. You could finally move on with your life and find someone who actually wanted you and only you. It’s a lot easier said than done.

But when Kells invites you to a party, you can’t exactly turn him down. So, there you were, standing in his living room with a drink in your hand talking to a guy you’d just met. He seemed pretty cool, and he wasn’t Rook, so you figured you’d see where it went.

It was going nowhere, but once you felt Rook’s eyes on you, you faked interest in the man, if only to get his attention off of you. You were an hour deep into a conversation at this point, and your glass was empty. “I’m gonna go get a drink.” It was almost like he read your mind. “I’ll grab you another, if you want.”

You nodded, “thanks.” He made his way to the bar, leaving you alone in the middle of the crowded room. Not 3 seconds after he left was he replaced with your ex-fling.

“Y/N, I didn’t know you were gonna be here.” He looked you up and down, taking in every detail of your all too familiar body.

You flashed him an uncomfortable smile, “yeah, Kells invited me.”

“Who’s the guy?” He asked and you rolled your eyes.

“No offense, Rook, but fuck off.” You sighed.

He furrowed his eyebrows. “It was an innocent question, fuck.” You let out a dry, angry, laugh. “Seriously, I was just asking.”

“It’s none of your business anymore.” You really wished you had a drink in your hand right now.

Rook’s face fell, and you almost dropped your cold façade. “I know, I just. I miss you.”

And it came back up again. “You don’t get to miss me. You never wanted me in the first place.” A few weeks ago, you could never had said everything you’d been thinking since that day, but now you realized just how fucked up what he had done was.

“That’s not true.” He muttered, a serious expression on his face.

You rolled your eyes, shaking your head. “Look, it was fun, but I’m over it, I’m over you. You could never give me what I need, anyways.”

You started to turn to walk towards the bar, wanting your drink, but he grabbed your wrist softly. “I did want you. I do want you. I didn’t realize it then because I’m an idiot, but I think I love you.”

You shook your wrist out of his grasp, blowing a quick breath out of your nose. “No, you don’t. Rook, you don’t know how to love.”

“I can learn, I will learn. For you. I’m gonna be better, I swear.”

“You don’t have the capacity to love anyone but yourself. You’re a loveless person.”

Satisfied with that, you turned and left him standing there, gazing after you with a lost look in his eyes.

You realized as soon as you walked away that you didn’t really mean what you said. Truthfully, you were still hurting, and seeing him made it worse. But you couldn’t apologize. You needed him to think you really felt that way, so he wouldn’t chase after you.

That plan didn’t work, which was apparent when JP showed up at your door, a bouquet of flowers in his hand and a butterfly squishmallow.

“I know I majorly fucked things up with you and you have every right to never want to see me again. But I’m not giving up on you. You are the only girl I’ve ever felt this way about. Like, seriously, you make me wanna settle down and be a better person, and I realized last night that I might never feel this again.” He had a whole speech and everything, and you could tell he put a lot of thought into this.

“Come in,” you whispered, leading him inside your house. You pulled out a vase to set the flowers in, placing them in the center of your small living room. You then grabbed his hand and pulled him to sit on your couch, the stuffed animal still in his arms.

“Y/N, I really meant it when I said I’m in love with you.” His voice was soft and he could barely meet your eyes. He was really nervous.

You bit your bottom lip, smiling. “You really planned this out, huh?”

He chuckled, looking down at the small butterfly in his hand and then placing it in your lap. “Yeah. I heard you and Ashleigh talking about these things a while ago. Kinda have had it for a while, but I was scared you would think it’s stupid.”

“It’s not stupid, it’s sweet.” You tilted your head, admiring him.

“You would not believe the stares I got when I was buying this. It was like no one had ever seen a guy with tattoos buying a stuffed animal before.” He chuckled, finally looking up to meet your eyes. “But it was worth it.”

You blushed, you two were quiet for a moment as you tried to sort out your thoughts. “I was really hurt.” You whispered, “when you said that we weren’t serious. And it’s not your fault, I just misread things, but I couldn’t be around you after that.”

He nodded, “It is my fault, though. You were right, people don’t bring other people on tour if they’re not serious about them. I led you on, and you had every right to kick me out.” You let out a soft sigh, relieved he was admitting some responsibility. “But I realized that I was so much better when I was around you, once I couldn’t be around you anymore.”

“I just wish it didn’t take me kicking you out for you to realize that.” You looked down at the blue plushie in your hands.

He was quiet for a while, studying you. “You can flip it inside out and it becomes a different animal.”

You chuckled, “yeah, it becomes an axolotl.”

He nodded, a smile on his face. “You’re amazing, you know that?”

His statement brought a blush to your cheeks. “Shut up.” You giggled, reaching up to push his chest lightly. He grabbed your hand and intertwined your fingers.

“I’m serious. You’re literally perfect.” He pulled you closer to him, leaning towards you so your faces were inches apart. “I never thought I would feel this way about anyone, but I am really, really in love with you.”

You took in a small breath at his words, processing them before you leaned closer to him, closing the gap between you. His lips moved effortlessly against yours, the hand not holding yours reaching up to lightly touch your jaw. When you finally pulled away, you rested your nose against his. “I’m really, really in love with you, too.” You whispered, a smile on your face.

He leaned forward to capture your lips in his again, both of you smiling into each other. “Just because I forgive you doesn’t mean you’re done making this up to me.” You giggled.

“No? And what else could I do to make this better, princess?” He whispered; sarcasm laced in his voice.

“I could think of a few things…” You trailed off, a giggle leaving your lips.

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