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#we’ve both had many a hopeless romantic rant with each other so i’m happy to see her find someone
mars-ipan · 11 months
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hehe my friends are cute :3
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auror-lovie · 4 years
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I Won’t Say (I’m in Love) (Theseus Scamander)
━━━•✦.✧. Author’s Note.✧.✦•━
Second writing challenge??? LET’S GO.
Also, I’m trying out a new editing thing. So may be I’ll be using a mix of moodboards and character banners??? I don’t know, tell me how the aesthetic feels.
Congrats Haley ( @wand3ringr0s3​ )!!! To one of my lovely motivators, you deserve all the followers and so much more! Sending all the love and support!
A big thanks to @weasleysflowr​ and her fic for this challenge! Thanks to your fic, it gave me the motivation to bust my butt off and finish this AT 2 AM. Love ya, Ayli!!!
━━━━━•✦.✧. About .✧.✦•━
(Y/N) didn’t mean to fall in love with him- she was only doing her job.
━━━━━•✦.✧. Add- Ons .✧.✦•━
It’s about time I start sharing my man with the readers (Sorry I’m such a simp for Theseus-)
Preface: Theseus and Leta are not engaged in this universe.
Angst, but what’s new?
Dialogue heavy
Character death :)
(Okay, I REALLY LOVE WRITING ANGSTY THETORIA CONTENT, HUH. WHETHER IT BE PLATONIC OR ROMANTIC-)
I usually write Theseus and Victoria with perfect personalities… I hope this fic will change that and I can start writing more of their ugly sides.
━━━━━━•✦.✧.☾.✧.✦•━━━━━
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Haley’s 1.9K Writing Challenge:
I Won’t Say (I’m in Love): Theseus Scamander x Reader
━━━━━━•✦.✧.☾.✧.✦•━━━━━
“You’re so pretty, why don’t you have a boyfriend?”
Was the question that (Y/N) received on a near day to day basis. Some from colleagues, some from distant relatives, and some from random people who tried to ask her out on a date.
To answer that question would take a whole other story, but to keep it short: She was hurt by first love. (Y/N) loved him with all her heart and he repaid her by falling in love and running away with another woman.
(Y/N) was a hopeless romantic and she was aware of that. All the romance novels that the muggles always talked about- she read them. All the romance films- she watched them. When her fellow Aurors were in relationships, she felt joy and happiness swell in her heart.
Though she desperately wanted a boyfriend, she was afraid. Afraid that one day, he’d leave her. So she kept her heart locked away. Besides, there was no time for romance- not in the midst of a war. Rumors of Grindelwald gathering more members for his “organization” spread through the Auror department like wildfire.
Under the temporary direction of Head Auror Victoria Howard, missions were successful. Despite feeling anxious, she led her fellow Aurors with confidence and determination. Yes, there were casualties, but that was the price of any mission.
Victoria always had a weird feeling about (Y/N). (Y/N) was sweet, nurturing, and quite intelligent. She was a great Auror, but something didn’t sit right with her. These feelings amplified when War Hero, Theseus Scamander, came into the picture.
Theseus walked into the room full of Aurors behind Victoria and Travers. “As you all know, the Head Auror Howard will be stepping down and Theseus Scamander will be taking her place.”
Declarations of distress echoed throughout the room. “But sir, Miss Howard was leading us just fine!” An Auror argued.
Before Travers could stupidly respond, Victoria took a step forward. “I know some of you may not agree with the changes, but Mister Scamander is a great leader. I think he’ll bring us farther than I ever could.”
Theseus nodded and patted Victoria’s shoulder. “One of the reasons why I’m a great leader is because of her. She’s always pushing me to be the best. So I hope I can lead you all to victory to the best of my abilities.”
After the formalities, Victoria had led Theseus around the room to get to know his fellow partners. He got along with most of them. The ones he didn’t get along with were the ones still slightly upset about the change, but he paid no mind to it. Then they got to (Y/N).
“Hello, Mr. Scamander. I’m (Y/N) (L/N) and I’m looking forward to working under your direction.” (Y/N) greeted happily.
Victoria felt her stomach twist up in knots, but didn’t let it show. Was she jealous? No- something didn’t feel right about (Y/N) and she was determined to find out.
“Well, Miss (L/N), I’m looking forward to working with you as well. Victoria has said amazing things about you.” Theseus replied.
•✦.✧.☾.✧.✦•
It had only been three months and he asked (Y/N) out on a date.
Victoria was in Leta’s office, pacing back and forth.
“Three months. Three months, Leta! And he’s already made his move on her!” Victoria ranted.
Leta sighed, rubbing her temples. “From what I’m hearing, I’m assuming you’re… jealous.”
Victoria stopped pacing and glared at her friend. “I’m not jealous, Leta. I’m over-protective. I trust my intuition and I know that (Y/N) girl is up to no good.”
“Have you talked to Theseus about it?”
“W-Well… No…” She trailed off.
“Then that’s your problem, Vi.”
Victoria sighed and plopped herself on a chair. “I swear… That girl’s got something to hide…”
~*~*~
To say he had a crush was an understatement. No- Theseus was in love with her.
“Wow. What a day. First that restaurant and then a nice walk in the park?” Theseus started as he and (Y/N) walked into a nearby park.
They both chuckled, Theseus shoving his hands in his pockets. “I didn't know that playing hooky could be so much fun.”
(Y/N) smiled. “Yeah. Neither did I.”
“Thanks, (Y/N).”
“Oh, don't thank me just yet. Oh!” She exclaimed, tripping on a crack in the pavement, falling into Theseus’ arms.
“Careful. I guess being quick and light on your feet only applies to the mission field, huh?” Theseus teased.
“Sorry,” (Y/N) laughed nervously. “I’m a klutz.”
“Oh? Well, maybe you better sit down for a while.” He said, carrying her to a nearby bench and they sat down.
(Y/N) cleared her throat, ignoring the blush rising to her cheeks. “So, uh, do you have any problems with things like… this?”
Theseus cocked his head to the side in confusion. “Uh…”
“Klutzes, I mean.”
“Oh. Uh, no. Not really.” He shrugged.
(Y/N) moved closer to him. “No weaknesses whatsoever? No mundane worries?”
“What are you getting at, (Y/N)?”
(Y/N), moving even closer to him. “No… insecurities?”
“E-Everyone has insecurities and worries. I worry about losing the people I care most about. My parents, my brother, Victoria, Leta…” He paused. “You.” He mumbled.
“What was that?” She asked.
“Nothing!” Theseus cleared his throat. “It was nothing.” He said, finally stood up from the bench. “Let’s just get back before people notice that we’ve been gone for most of the afternoon.”
~*~*~
Theseus and (Y/N) quickly made their way into the Ministry Headquarters, making sure to stay out of sight. They ran up to the Auror department without causing a scene.
When they reached the door to (Y/N)’s office, they stopped outside to catch their breath.
“Pretty Boy… You are... perfect.” (Y/N) said between breaths.
“Thanks…” Theseus paused. “You know, as a kid, I was expected to set high standards. I was Quidditch captain, Head Boy, and took as many NEWT level classes as I could. I think that’s why my brother dislikes me so much.” He chuckled, resting his head against the wall. “I just… I just wanted to be like every other guy.”
She scoffed. “You wanted to be petty and dishonest?”
“Not everyone is like that.”
“Yes, they are.” (Y/N) said softly.
Theseus turned his gaze to her. “You're not like that.”
“How do you know what I'm like?” She spat.
Theseus took her tone as a defense mechanism. “All I know is... You're the most amazing person I've ever met. (Y/N), when I'm with you I don't feel so... alone.”
“Sometimes it's better to be alone.” She said, rubbing her upper arms.
“What makes you say that?” He asked, pushing himself off the wall.
“Nobody can hurt you.” (Y/N) said, trying her best to not look at him.
“I would never ever hurt you.” Theseus quickly replied.
(Y/N) turned to face him, not realizing how close they were to each other. “And I don't wanna hurt you, so... let's both do ourselves a favor and stop this before we-”
Their lips moved in close for a kiss, but the moment before it happened, a voice interrupted them.
“All right, break it up! I’ve been looking all over the Ministry for you.” Victoria said as she came into view.
(Y/N) groaned in annoyance once she realized who it was. “Calm down, Victoria. It was all my fault.”
“I already have a bone to pick with you, so don't make it worse,” Victoria said, glaring at (Y/N).
“And as for you,” She looked at Theseus. Theseus looked at her before quickly avoiding her stare. “You’re lucky I saved your arse from Travers. We had a meeting today and you were supposed to lead it, but no. You decided to play hooky.”
“Okay, okay…” Theseus said, feeling like a child being reprimanded by their parent. As much as he deserved it, he hated it when she scolded him.
“I'm sorry.” (Y/N) said softly.
He let out a half-hearted chuckle. “Ah, she'll get over it,” Theseus said, facing her. He tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear and kissed her cheek.
“Come on, Theseus. We have work to do.” Victoria said, crossing her arms over her chest.
Theseus gave (Y/N) a smile before walking off with Victoria.
(Y/N) was left alone, her hand touching the cheek he’d kissed minutes ago. “Oh, what's the matter with me? You'd think a girl would learn.”
“(Y/N)! You’re finally here! I have things to discuss with you.”
(Y/N) quickly turned around to see Leta. “L-Leta!”
Leta smiled. “Don’t worry. Unlike Victoria, I won’t go all Mama Bear on you. Shall we discuss this in your office?” She asked, gesturing to the door.
She nodded. “Of course!”
Once inside, Leta and (Y/N) sat on the chairs. “So, tell me everything! How was your date?”
(Y/N) blushed lightly. “I-It was hardly a date. It was more of an… extended lunch.”
“Come on, spill the details! Do you like him?” Leta asked excitedly.
“What? O-Of course not.” She sighed, reminiscing on her first love. She would not fall victim to love- not again. “If there's a prize for rotten judgment, I guess I've already won that. No man is worth the aggravation. That's ancient history been there, done that.”
“Are you kidding? He’s the Earth and Heaven to you! You may try to keep it hidden, but honey, I can see right through you.” Leta replied.
“Oh, no. That’s preposterous! I can’t possibly be-”
“I know how you feel. I can see it in your eyes, (Y/N). You’re in lo-”
“No way. It's too cliche,” (Y/N) quickly interrupted.
“(Y/N), just listen-” Leta started again.
“Get off my case, Leta…” She trailed off.
Leta sighed, patting (Y/N)’s shoulder. “It's okay if you're in love…”
(Y/N) looked at Leta and smiled, relaxing in her chair. “At least at loud, I won't say I'm in love.”
After a while, Leta had left and (Y/N) sat at her desk to complete her piling paperwork. All was silent until-
“Hey, what's the buzz, huh, (Y/N)? What is the weak link in the Pretty Boy's chain?” A voice asked.
“Get yourself another girl, I'm through.” (Y/N) replied, exhausted.
“I'm sorry. Do you mind running that by me again? I must have had a chunk of stone wedged in my ear or something.” said Grindelwald as he came into view from the shadows.
“Then read my lips! Forget it!” She said, slamming her hands on her desk and glaring at him.
Grindelwald chuckled darkly. “(Y/N), (Y/N), (Y/N), my sweet deluded little minion. Aren't we forgetting one teensy-weensy, but ever so crucial little, tiny detail? I own you!”
“I’ll just apologize for snapping at them and not considering their relationship… Whatever they are…” Victoria mumbled to herself as she walked to (Y/N)’s office.
Grindelwald continued, “You work for me! If I say, "sing", you say, "Hey, name that tune" If I say, "I want Pretty Boy’s head on a platter," you say-”
“Medium or well done,” (Y/N) sassed back.
Victoria gasped softly as she heard a snippet of their argument from the opposite side of the door. “Oh! I knew that girl was trouble. This is gonna break Theseus’ heart.”
“I'll work on that.” (Y/N) mumbled.
Victoria quietly ran back to Theseus’ office to give him the news.
“I'm sorry... You hear that sound? That's the sound of your freedom fluttering out the window forever.” Grindelwald continued, his hand moving in a shoo-ing motion.
“I don't care. I'm not gonna help you hurt him.” (Y/N) said, her voice cracking.
“I can't believe you're getting so worked up about some guy.” He said nonchalantly.
“This one is different. He's honest, and-and he's sweet. He would never do anything to hurt me.”
“He's a guy!” Grindelwald said, making a last attempt to get it through her head.
“Besides, you can't beat him. He has no weaknesses-”
Grindelwald walked into her line of view and smirked. “I think... he does, (Y/N). I truly think... he does.”
~*~*~
Theseus sat in his chair, spinning around. “After Victoria and (Y/N) make up, we can put this all behind us.”
Victoria walked sad, slowly closing the door behind her. She whispered a silencing charm on the room before trying to figure out what to say.
“Hey, Victoria! What happened? Did you do it?”
Victoria cleared her throat. “Thes, we gotta talk.”
“Oh, Victoria, I just had the greatest day of my life! I can't stop thinking about (Y/N). She's something else.”
“Theseus! I'm trying to talk to you! Will you stop spinning in that stupid chair, calm down, and listen?”
He stopped spinning in his chair before trying to look at her- his head adjusting to the sudden stop in motion. “Aw, how can I calm down when I'm feeling so up?”
“What I'm trying to say is-”
Theseus grinned. “If it wasn't for you, I never would have met her. Oh, I owe you big time.”
“Will you just knock it off for a couple of seconds?” Victoria said, a bit agitated.
“Come on, Victoria, live a little! I’ve finally found happiness during this stupid war.”
“Listen to me! (Y/N)'s-” She started, moving closer to his desk.
“A dream come true?” Theseus quipped.
Victoria rolled her eyes. “Not exactly.”
“Absolutely beautiful?” He said, dreamily.
“Aside from that!” Victoria sighed, rubbing her temples.
“The most wonderful-” Theseus began.
“She's a fraud! She’s been playing with your feelings!”
“I know you're upset about today, but that's no reason to-”
She ran her fingers through her hair. “You're missing the point.”
“The point is - I love her.” He said, standing up from his chair.
Victoria crossed her arms over her chest. “She doesn't love you, Thes. She's nothing but a two-timing,”
“Stop it!” He moved around his desk.
“No-good, lying, scheming-”
“Shut up!” He yelled, shoving Victoria towards the bookshelf.
She lost her footing and her back slammed against the bookshelf, causing some of the books to fall. She yelped as her back made contact.
Theseus’ eyes widened at his actions. He looked down at his hands, which were twitching, before looking back at her. “Victoria, I- Oh, I'm, I'm sorry.”
Victoria hissed in pain as one of her arms reached over to rub the spot of impact. “You need to control your temper, Theseus, but besides the point. You don’t want to face the truth? Fine.” She winced as she slowly shoved herself off the bookcase and walked towards the door, not caring about the books on the floor.
“Victoria, wait. W-Where are you going?” He stammered.
“I'm going home.” She replied, wincing once again.
“What? Why? You can’t go home until you’ve been checked. I can take you to the Healer-”
“You know… You came home a War Hero and became the highly respected Auror that you are…” Victoria trailed off, stopping in her tracks. He took a step towards her. She turned her head slightly, Theseus now able to see the small, sad smile on her face. “But you’re not the Theseus that left me all those years ago.”
Theseus sighed. “Victoria, you can’t keep living in the past!”
Victoria turned around- quickly regretting her actions as her muscles ached. “So was our friendship nothing? All these years, since we were eleven- nothing?!”
“You’re making a big deal out of nothing! I thought you were my friend!”
“Of course I’m your friend! You’re just not seeing that… that (Y/N) is working for the other side!” She said, flailing her arms around to make her point, no longer caring about the pain it caused.
“She wouldn’t-”
Victoria grumbled. “Here we are again. Don’t believe me? So be it… But remember this: when the truth reveals itself? Don’t come crying to me.”
“Fine! It’s not like I needed you anyway!” He said angrily, but instantly regretted his choice of words.
Victoria gasped, her hands covering her mouth.
Now he’d done it. Theseus made his way to her. “V-Victoria, I didn’t mean that- I was just-”
Victoria put up her hand to stop him mid-sentence and mid-walk. “It’s okay. Just finish signing the paperwork and you can leave.”
“Victoria-” He called out, a pathetic attempt to keep her there.
“I’ve saved your arse time and time again- since the beginning. Years ago, that was schoolboy stupidity. Now? Hell, I don’t know what this is. I don’t even know who you are anymore. I’ll see you tomorrow, Mister Scamander.” She said before leaving his office.
•✦.✧.☾.✧.✦•
Months after their argument, things were back to normal- sort of. Auror duo, Howard-Scamander, had split apart. Even though it was odd not to see them on missions together, no one dared to question it or ask either person about it.
Then Victoria’s claim about (Y/N) working with Grindelwald had been proven. Theseus, Victoria, and (Y/N) gathered in Travers’ office. After a long interrogation, Travers had decided (Y/N)’s fate.
“Due to your affiliation with Gellert Grindelwald, you are therefore guilty of a treasonous-”
“You know I didn’t hurt anyone, you know that! You’ve seen me in the field! Or are you in such a high position where being deployed on missions is not in your job description?”
“You are therefore guilty of a treasonous betrayal of your fellow wizards and are sentenced to death.” Travers finished.
Two executioners step forward. They calmly, intrusively, press the tips of their wands into (Y/N)’s neck. (Y/N) was so overcome with shock and fear that she could barely speak.
“Just do it immediately. I will inform Minister Fawley myself.” Travers said to the executioners.
Victoria opened her mouth to speak, but no words could come out. 
“Travers, she doesn’t deserve this!” Theseus yelled.
Travers placed a finger to his lips. “That’s enough. Miss Howard, please escort Mister Scamander out of here.”
~*~*~
A long, black, metallic corridor led into a pure white cell, which consisted of a chair suspended magically over a square pool of rippling potion. (Y/N) was forced into this room by the executioners. A guard stood at the door.
“Don’t do this. Nicole, please-” (Y/N) pleaded.
“It won’t hurt.” Nicole cooed softly.
(Y/N) was led to the edge of the pool. She began panicking, her breathing heavy and erratic.
The other executioner raised their wand and carefully extracted (Y/N)’s happy memories from her head. (Y/N) instantly calmed down, her expression now vacant. The executioner cast the memories into the potion, which rippled, coming alive with scenes from (Y/N)’s life.
A young (Y/N) smiled up as her mother called, “(Y/N)... (Y/N)... Come on, dearie, time for bed. Are you ready? You’re headed off to Hogwarts tomorrow.”
“I’m ready, mum…”
(Y/N) watched, smiling down at the scene.
“Doesn’t that look good? You wanna go to the chair?” Nicole asked calmly. (Y/N) nodded vacantly as she was guided onto the chair.
She now sat in the execution chair. She gazed down and beneath her swirled happy images of her at Hogwarts.
“(Y/N) (L/N)!”
(Y/N) hesitantly walked to the stool and sat down. She felt the hat being placed on top of her head.
“Difficult! Very difficult… Decisions, decisions…"
A small moment passed before the hat roared, “RAVENCLAW!”
(Y/N), still gazing into the pool, smiled wistfully. A small bubble started to form around the chair,
“(Y/N)!” Theseus’ voice echoed throughout the room.
A spell fired, hitting Nicole, who dropped to the floor, her wand falling into the pool. As it fell, the liquid rose up in viscous black bubbles, instantly engulfing the wand. In reaction, (Y/N)’s memories turned from good to bad: The memory of Grindelwald’s plan to use (Y/N) was displayed.
“See, he's gotta have a weakness, because everybody's got a weakness I mean for what? Pandora, it was the box thing, for the Trojans, hey, they bet on the wrong horse, okay? We simply need to find out Pretty Boy's.” Grindelwald said, walking around the room.
(Y/N) sat on the cushion of the bay view window. “I've done my part. Get your other imps-”
“They couldn't handle him as a soldier. I need someone who can... handle him as a man.”
“Hey, I've sworn off manhandling.” She replied.
“Well, you know, that's good because that's what got you into the jam in the first place, isn't it? You swore your allegiance to me to save your boyfriend's life. And how does that jerk thank you? By running off with some babe. He hurt you real bad, didn't he, (Y/N)? Huh?” He taunted.
(Y/N) rolled her eyes. “Look, I learned my lesson, okay?”
Grindelwald circled around the room before stopping at her side. “Which is exactly why I got a feeling you're gonna leap at my new offer. You give me the key to bringing down that War Hero and I give you the thing that you crave most in the entire Wizarding World,” He stopped next to her and bent down. “Your freedom.” He whispered in her ear.
(Y/N), still enraptured by the pool, looked increasingly terrified. Her stool lowered closer and closer to the liquid.
Theseus managed to disarm and bind up Nicole, the other executioner, and the guard. He was about to save (Y/N) until
“Expelliarmus!” A voice shouted from the door.
Theseus’ wand was knocked from his hand. He turned around to Victoria standing at the door, catching her breath. She muttered the summoning charm before his wand was summoned to her hand.
Victoria quickly got hold of his wand before Theseus could reach it.
Theseus looked at her. “Victoria, I know we’re not on speaking terms, but please… My wand…”
She stared at him. A year ago, she’d give in, but not now. “No, I can’t let you save her Mister Scamander.”
“If you can’t beat them… then join them, right?” He let out a sad laugh. “If this is the last thing I tell you, I want you to know that even after this, you’re still my best friend. And you’re one hell of an Auror.” He said before making his way toward the edge of the pool.
Victoria gasped. “Damn it, Theseus!” She walked into the room and pointed her wand at him, “Incarcerous!”
Theseus was then bound by thick cords that came out of thin air, causing him to fall on his side. He hissed at the pain, but Victoria paid no mind. At least her friend was safe.
Victoria pointed her wand at the executioners and guard, unbinding them from their restraints. “Now get out of here.” The three of them nodded before shuffling out of the room.
Theseus looked at the memory pool, watching the last of (Y/N) memories. Victoria looked up at (Y/N), seeing the tears running down her cheeks. She almost felt pity for her- almost.
“Victoria, please…” Theseus pleaded for probably the last time.
Victoria then looked at the memory pool. It changed to the day where she and Theseus played hooky. She could see how happy they were together.
(Y/N) let out a sad laugh, causing Victoria and Theseus to look up at her. “I love you, Theseus… Sorry I didn’t tell you that day…” (Y/N) cried before the potion fully consumed her.
Theseus choked a sob as he held onto Victoria, hugging her torso, hiding his face in her shoulder. Victoria felt the tears building up before reality caught up to her. She gasped softly, tears running down her face.
Victoria was responsible for the execution of a fellow Auror. She was worried about her standings with Theseus, but that didn’t matter at the moment.
At that moment, she needed to comfort and be there for her friend. For her friend was mourning the loss of the one he loved the most.
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lenawin4 · 7 years
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Urgh, lost my draft and had to start this again.
So it’s time to do that tag game thing @easkyrah and @winged-defender-of-deltora asked me to do. Thanks friends/mom~~~
relationship status: Single, with my husbands Sherlock Holmes, Dr. John Watson, Tobias Eaton, James T. Kirk, Anthony DiNozzo, also plenty of other fictional characters---you know the drill.
last song listened to: I had to make up an essay and was sleepy, so I chose mY FAVORITE PIECE OF ALL TIME ALSO BY MY HUSBAND, SERGEI RACHMANINOFF. That’s right---Piano Concerto No. 2. Did you know that Sergei was depressed for quite some time after many criticized his previous symphony and he felt lost after his role model, Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky passed away? Did you know that he wrote his way out with music, out of the dumps and into the light? Did you know he blew the audience away with this concerto, and showed them all what music is, with its swells and excitement and anger and disappointment and dreams? Sergei is me, I am Sergei---we are such grand dreamers, travelling to a distant world that only exists for ourselves, then coming back down to Earth and attempting to explain it in words---but, this is not possible. The only way to describe the ethereal, captivating magic that is true to us is through music.
last book read: The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald (cries because for @easkyrah and @winged-defender-of-deltora, it’s also The Great Gatsby because school). We are all Gatsby, reaching out to that distant dream, fingers almost grasping it as we realize dreams never come true, not the way we over-romanticized it with our wild imaginations. Lost Generation and hopelessness feels are strong.
favorite color: Purple, mainly because of the Lakers ever since I was a child, but also because dark purple is aesthetically pleasing to me.
top 3 ships:
Oh.
Oh my.
@easkyrah, @winged-defender-of-deltora, you knew this was coming.
~~~~BEWARE: TIVA RANT ALERT~~~
1)Anthony DiNozzo/Ziva David, Tiva, NCIS.
I marathoned NCIS in the summer of 2009 and began watching it live every Tuesday (that’s right, before I got a DVR and could record stuff) at quite a young age. I remember it distinctly---my favorite episode to this day is that one. 
That’s right Tiva shippers.
That one.
Truth or Consequences, Season 7, Episode 1. 
“Are you alright, McGee?”
“I’m just glad you’re still alive.”
“You thought...I was dead?”
“Oh...Oh yeah. Huh.”
“Then why are you here?”
“Well...McGee didn’t think you were dead...McGee...”
“Tony. Why are you here?”
“Couldn’t live without you, I guess.”
So I grew up shipping Tiva, majorly. As I grew older, I could see why these characters were so compelling: they are both so amazingly complex and their chemistry is so special that it is impossible not for them to love each other. They choose not to, to obey Rule 12 (which was broken by Bishop with her just simply asking, which made me quite mad, but that is a different subject). But in the end, they chose each other in that orange grove, Ziva so deep in self-hatred, guilt, disgust, and exhaustion, Tony so deep in love, desperation, and need. Ziva is so lost in herself and blinded by the belief that she will never be enough, that she will never do enough good to balance her sins and the blood on her hands; Tony is so loving, patient, kind, and desperate for a woman to stay with him like she has---brought back by a terrorist who kept her in his camp for months, brought back by finding her over and over again (Cobb, the elevator, the post-elevator us, Tali and the opera). Who loves him as she has---someone who understands fatherly issues, someone who understands dead mothers, someone who understands choices that were made to put them on their path they are right now (Tony’s college basketball injury, the fire where he saved the little boy but couldn’t save his sister; Ziva’s choices to please her father, Tali’s death, Ari’s murderous fall, dead from her finger).
They are also defying the stereotypical role: Tony may be the playboy who went to boarding school and loves movies, but there are reasons behind his fears of commitment (Wendy, Paula, Kate, Jeanne---all the women who leave him or die) and unending love for film (his mother). Ziva may look like the badass woman, heartless assassin---but she has such a large heart for NCIS, for Gibbs, for Abby, for McGee, for everyone; for her sister, her mother, her father, her brother, as well as a strong sense of individuality and justice. Her father left her to die in the desert---and yet she forgave him, and loved him. His death broke her. Her brother was a terrorist, and she forced herself to kill him---to protect the innocent (Gibbs).
My point is: Tony and Ziva complement each other so well that over 8 years, they became dependent on the presence of their partner. We’ve seen what happens when one leaves the other: both of them fall into disarray (of course, not with Tali, their daughter).
They’ve done so much for the other---he jeopardized his entire career, and for what? For you.; he went to desert to die for vengeance, no, for love; she went to the desert to die for guilt, penance at what she did to him, to Michael. He was willing to fight for her---he was fighting for you, Ziva; she couldn’t let him in because---the ones who get too close always end up dead. These two have been through everything together and they always come back to each other to strengthen the other, to love the other.
And they deserved SO MUCH BETTER. I really, really don’t like that Ziva didn’t tell Tony about their child----I thought that was very inaccurate of her character. Nevertheless, I wanted to see them happy, not matter what fan theories say. I think Ziva David deserved so much more than just one episode concerning her death, and more than just a few clips to remember her---because she was so much more than just a regular Jewish female character.
But, I am extremely happy that it is finally, finally canon.
“I loved her , Tim.”
“I know you did.”
They are just THE ULTIMATE, PERFECT SHIP.
Anyway. Moving on.
~~~TIVA RANT OVER~~~
2)Sherlock Holmes/Irene Adler, Adlock, A Scandal in Bohemia, The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle.
I mean, what can I say? Irene Adler is the only person in the entire Holmes universe who outsmarts him. The dialogue, the choreography in Sherlock, the legendary strong, feminine, sneaky traits of Adler---Sherlock is intrigued by her, and obviously is interested in her, romantic or not.
These two, in my opinion, are as iconic as Watson and Holmes are because of the dynamic and the chemistry between them. I think BBC Sherlock portrayed their relationship the best---the need to impress her, the desire to play this cat-like game, pouncing on each other with each chance. The acting was amazing---Lara Pulver and Benedict Cumberbatch, thank you very much. It’s golden, and I love it.
3)Jyn Erso/Cassian Andor, RebelCaptain, Rogue One: A Star Wars Story.
I fell in love with these two halfway into the movie, and I still am (as of right now, stuck in a RebelCaptain fanfiction overload). The chemistry between Diego Luna (isn’t he adorable?) and Felicity Jones was on fire (as they soon were---too soon?).
They also have similar childhoods---having to fend for themselves at a very young age, putting walls upon walls up, but only needing a few days with each other to make a connection, to see themselves in each other, and make a choice to trust the other despite their reservations, their anger, their fears.
What other ship has one of them climb up an elevator, shot, to make sure the other is okay? What other ship has an intense scene in an elevator, descending toward their doom (Well...see #1.)? What other ship dies in each other’s arms, turning into Stardust?
“Your father would have been proud of you, Jyn.” 
(You could hear me screaming in the movie theatre.)
So there you have it. I don’t have anyone to tag, so, oops. Thanks again for tagging me so I could Tiva rant randomly @easkyrah and @winged-defender-of-deltora!
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ireneisdacoolest · 5 years
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Blog Post #4: Social Mirrors
Chosen person: Lorenzo Lagamon
How I think they see me
In hindsight, Enzo and I are relatively new friends. We met because of the Ateneo Debate Society (ADS), an organization that only accepted me midway through the 1st semester. Although we had met by that time, we only really started talking in November, when the topic of crushes was brought about. I think those contexts, debate and crushes, really reflect in how Enzo thinks of me.
I think Enzo thinks I’m happy. Although I have been upset and express my sadness to him, I normally show a very enthusiastic disposition to the ADS. By extension, he sees that side of me as well.
However, in my lamenting about my crush he sees a hopeless romantic. Someone who loves very quickly and very hard.
I’d like to believe that he sees me as someone who is loving and caring, not only to my crush of course, but to my friends. I feel like I sacrifice and listen to my friends, and I give them kind acts of service. So in summary, a good friend.
I hope he sees me as a shoulder to lean on or the go-to person when talking about his day, because that’s definitely how I see him!
I also think he would see me as his best friend in the ADS, as in the short time we’ve known each other, we’ve been through a lot. Through numerous debate tournaments, training and meals out, we’ve become a lot closer. I think he thinks of me this way, because that’s how I think of him.
The more I write, the more I realize that my relationship with Enzo is one of reciprocity. I would like to believe that the way he views me is the way I view him.
And honestly if that’s the case, I should not be afraid of what he has to say.
What Enzo actually thinks of me
Irene asked me to write about her. I accepted without flinching, of course; but the immediate question I had to ask was not what is this for? Or why? But rather: well, where do I begin? After much introspection, I begin with the first time I met her. She knows this story too well, saying it again might intoxicate her. I met her in PSDC 2017. PSDC or Philippine Schools Debate Championship is an annual and national high school tournament organized by the Ateneo Debate Society. She was from Miriam College and I? A lowly and quiet school from Northern Mindanao. We were already in the knockout rounds of said competition when Irene — well, knocked me out. I remembered her face. In my head back then, she was a fierce woman with an undying fighting spirit tamed in a small stature. I feared her but at the same time I was angry at her. But by the blessings of the mysterious mechanisms of this universe, two different people from two very distant places now find themselves friends in the Ateneo. I always believed I would know her only as the girl who knocked me out of a tournament — but as a student of the Social Sciences, I should know better and remember that people are more than your first impressions. Over the course of our Freshman year in Ateneo, I’ve come to know Irene not just as a strong and powerful lady — but one who is too human as well. I have seen her cry because of love and the absence thereof. I have seen her laugh at the perfect moment and in the face of adversity. I have seen her dress up really well on many days. I have seen her wear shorts and a shirt too big on most. I have seen the rigour and the brilliance that make up the flames of her fierceness. I have seen the child and the longing that comprise her incessant: I want kiss (but only from a specific person, of course — whose name shall be forever redacted). Irene is brave but she is human. She is loving and thoughtful but she is human. She can sing really well — but she is human. Why do I have to make this caveat? Because oftentimes, plenty around her forget that in all her talents and amidst her commanding presence — Irene is still human too. She is brave, she is a fortress — but every once in a while, she allows herself to fall like Jericho. She is loving and thoughtful, she is patient — but sometimes she will fight you with aggression if you step out of line. She can sing really well, and she plays instruments too — but sometimes she goes off-key and her chords are played at the wrong tempo. I make these important caveats not out of spite but as a reminder that we oft neglect the humanity in heroes. They are heroes but they are human (and yet they are heroes still). I write of Irene’s strengths and I write of her imperfections not because I hate her, quite the opposite: but because truly loving someone means you see them for the human that that they are. Watch her walk the sacred halls of Schmitt, brave the torrential crowd at SecWalk, or eat her homemade vegetarian meal at Gonzaga Up, or wait for someone (a specific someone) in Matteo Ricci. Listen to her light up as she tells you how her day has been, taste the joy she pours on her poetry, and see her tears dry as she picks herself up. I sometimes catch myself writing in hyperbole or with one too many metaphors. I am in perpetual search for adverbs and synonyms. Today, I do not end that search. I could not find a prettier word to replace: very strong. She is very strong? Well, she is; but I do not want to end with that. Perhaps the closest approximate right now is: she is Irene — the toughest, most loving, most caring soul that knocked me out.
Reflection
I know Enzo to be a poetic person. So, I expected a level of flair from his write-up. What I didn’t expect is a full PDF with a header and all. Admittedly, the way we wrote our respective texts is very different, and the word choice is contrasting as well. While I expected words like, hopeless romantic, or good friend, he chose the word ‘strong’ as his motif.
Enzo even went back further than I did. It’s true that we interacted for the first time in a high school debate tournament a few years before college started, and I understand why that’s his first impression of me.
He gives no mention of me being a generally happy person.
I’m unsure if this means he doesn’t think I’m a happy person or if it’s a detail he simply chose to omit. Now that I think about it, perhaps I have ranted too many times to him for me to be seen as a definitively happy individual.
He does however, imply my hopeless romantic nature. He’s not very direct, and uses inside jokes to refer to my woes of my crush.
And, almost with relief as I read it, he does agree that I am loving and caring. For vain reasons, I’m glad this is the case. I quite honestly try very hard to make sure people think this way of me. That’s not to say it’s disingenuous, but it’s definitely crafted.
I think after comparing both of our outputs, only the words used differ but the essence stays rather the same. I’m glad this is the case because it means I know Enzo well enough, and he knows me too.
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