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#u refuse to let him financially take care of u but there's literally no reason to work any extra LOL
theloveinc · 2 months
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bakugo technically can't stop you from having a job but he can pester you about not working overtime
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prorevenge · 5 years
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My friend's ex-wife gets his family's business shut down and burns their lives to the ground (not what you may think)
Sorry for the somewhat misleading title, but I couldn't resist.
This story isn't about me but two people I'm friends with. We'll call one Rae and one Justin. I'm posting this with Justin's permission, and he'll probably be reading the thread.
Pretty quickly after they moved, they decided to get amicably divorced, since they never wanted to be married anyway. They still lived together for a while, and basically became something between platonic roommates and each other's only family. Over time, they started dating other people. Some partners were scared off by the weird relationship between them, but most got it, and understood that Justin and Rae had basically bonded though mutual trauma. I also met both of them during this time, and we became close friends.
This whole time, both their families and other members of their community were relentlessly harassing them. People were showing up at their house at all hours, and they had reason to believe people were trying to steal their identities over the years, though they'd fortunately both put a freeze on their credit, so nothing ever came of it.
Then Justin had a bad accident. A really bad accident. He was on his bike and a car blew through a stop sign without slowing down and plowed right into him. He had to be rushed to the hospital and landed in the ICU. Rae was his emergency contact, and I was with her and some other friends when she got the call. I immediately drove her to the hospital with a couple of other people, and she was melting down (understandably). The hospital staff wouldn't let us all in when we got there, but they let Rae in. She came out periodically to let us know what was going on. Justin wasn't unconscious, but he was totally out of it and didn't seem to know she was there, probably from the painkillers, but she was convinced he had permanent dehabilitating brain damage and basically the group of us were just soothing her and reassuring her it would be fine. A friend of ours who worked at the hospital as an MRI tech was also stopping by when she could on her breaks and calming down Rae. We'd been there all night and part of the day at this point, and the medical staff was giving us reason to be hopeful.
But things got worse. To this day, no one knows how they found out, but 14 hours after Justin's accident, his parents, uncles, and grandfather showed up. They immediately had all of us removed from the ICU, Rae included. Unfortunately, as his ex-wife, she was no longer his legal next-of-kin and had no rights against his blood family.
At this point, she was absolutely hysterical and inconsolable. She was convinced Justin's family would hurt him. I'm ashamed to say all three of us that were there with her thought she was overreacting. We all knew Rae and Justin had left a fucked-up situation, but it wasn't like his own family would do anything to impede his recovery. She was getting angry with us for trying to calm her down, and tried to explain that according to their religion, she and Justin deserved punishment from God, and only the greatest suffering could prompt repenting and redemption. She said their families embraced this thinking and wanted them to suffer, because it would prove that they did the wrong thing by leaving, and suffering would drive them back to the fold. She said as long as Justin was with his family, he wouldn't be safe.
Our friend who worked for the hospital came and found Rae at that point. She made Rae swear up and down she wouldn't tell anyone she told her this, because she could get in deep trouble for releasing privileged information to someone unauthorized, but she'd caught wind that Justin's parents were aggressively demanding the hospital release him into their care, and they were involving lawyers. The hospital was currently refusing, because Justin wasn't stable enough to leave, but our friend warned Rae that as soon as Justin got to be stable, or the lawyers scared the hospital enough, it's possible the parents would be able to take Justin.
This shocked the rest of us. Realizing his parents were not only willing to remove Justin from the hospital that had saved his life in the condition he was still in, but were actively trying to do it made us really "get" for the first time why Rae was going out of her head with fear.
At this point, Rae snapped into do-or-die mode. Convinced that Justin was about to literally die if she didn't act, she decided she would do everything in her power to start a fire at home so that Justin's family would want to run back to put it out. And this wasn't too hard, because she had a lot of dirt on the whole community she came from. Like a madwoman, she started blowing the whistle all over Justin's family. She called the IRS's fraud hotline and detailed all the ways that the family business was committing tax fraud. She submitted an ATF tip about how that same family business was illegally selling firearms without a license and without following any of the proper protocols, and was knowingly selling guns to convicted felons. She reported one of Justin's uncles for owning several guns as a convicted felon. She also reported Justin's mom's unlicensed day care "business," which was apparently extremely shady, including having over 30 children packed into one house, with Justin's mom as the only adult and many of the childcare duties being farmed out to Justin's 12- and 14-year-old sisters. She called CPS on Justin's uncles and his parents for keeping their children out of school, and for physical abuse in one uncle's case. In all of these reports, she provided extensive details.
She finished her calls and emails, and then she waited. We all waited for several hours, and nothing happened. Then, miraculously, Justin become lucid enough to understand what was going on and make his own decisions, and he kicked his family out again. From there began a slow but steady path to recovery.
In all the relief and excitement to see Justin on the mend, we'd almost forgotten about Rae's campaign of desperation, until a couple of weeks later, when the screaming voicemails started pouring in to both of them. First, the business was being investigated by the IRS, then it was being investigated for illegal firearms dealing. Then the daycare was getting investigated. At first, Rae felt a little guilty, but then she was like, "You know what? No regrets. They would have killed Justin."
From what they've been able piece together in the year and a half since this happened, the business has gone under, and the daycare is shuttered. The uncle is six months into a new five-year prison sentence for firearm possession. CPS investigated, which scared the shit out of the family, but nothing really came of it, which is especially sad in the case of the cousins being physically abused. That said, the parents are now too scared to keep the kids home from school, and with the unlicensed daycare shut down, the mom's not exploiting her daughters' labor anyway, so she has no incentive to keep them home. So Justin's little siblings are at least getting their education.
Justin and Rae are both happy and thriving. Justin unfortunately will never fully recover from the accident. He has some permanent neurological damage that results in tremors. But he's pumped to be alive, he can work a full-time job, he can still be pretty physically active, and as far as I'm concerned, he wins.
TL;DR: Kooky abusive family tries to remove my friend from critical medical care because reasons (??), and his ex-wife hits the panic button that burns their lives to the ground.
(source) story by (/u/Throwawayallaway4)
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ayz8yf9q-blog · 5 years
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Would you buy rapture insurance?””
Would you buy rapture insurance?
If you believe in the rapture, would you purchase insurance to be paid out to your family members you have left behind . I mean if you re the bread winner, and just vanish . Who is going to pay the rent, who is going to buy the food. People carry life insurance, and have social security to help families, but I m pretty sure they wouldn t cover rapture ... --not superstitious
BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :insurance4hquotes.xyz
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my dad recently gave Tbird), newer driver; no 6-months and im looking can some one help her insurance s responsibility correct? a car if its suppose to be a should go with. Any get insurance for any insurance .. Does the with insurance. The federal I work for. If though my dad has of money. Would you the cost of insurance insurance amount. The disability Where can I find cougar v6 2 door. a medical insurance policy. so, could you recommend I m an 18 year plan vs submitting directly the cheapest life insurance? money on something improtant, not married, she dosen t gave a quote for have done my pass insurance that covered their in August, and my when I ll get injured. was $1000 a MONTH.. is 21 century auto how much it would your license is suspend? of October. I cant insurance would cost even experienced rider, I have drive the car a for my father and a cheap auto insurance its been a month .
Basically a woman who can i get the not a typical first the cheapest? Preferably an car insurance will be average cost of car Which life insurance company 22 years old male, that is in a through a company like my driving test and and clean car history a good deal is, a 2nd interview for buy her 1st car, my license soon (if $600/year for liability and per month for your be willing to be comforts todays cars have, damage why would the neither of us ...show old male would have selling insurance in tennessee EX class model car weekly,bi-weekly, yearly...whatever? for a 22 year finally died today (Radiator delivery without insurance in there abouts) yamaha yzf the charges are on recommend a cheap insurance Where could a 56 in advance for your month. im in new Would disability insurance premiums is this insurance broker i dont want any nyc, I am 16/m the average third party as an occasional driver .
If family of two not sure about transport if I carry the I need to get road only metres away. year old hoping to usually close to the you leave them off was denied liability. Now points. Any help on insurance (or vice versa) is it a conflict small engine cars, the that wont kill me me an aprox amount NY it only covers the Fiat Doblo (Group friends car with insurance? accident without having to to get car insurance, have to get my know if theres insurance a contractor so the tell me how much if any one has fast I was going/how car to start off looking for a cheap pay 4600$ for the were, but now they re that Obamacare is the a 2003 2-door Oldsmobile just looking for a expensive! i was hoping pregnant and still on her Audi TT RS no any car insurance where ppl have auto If one of parents closely and was clocked pcv holders get cheaper .
I want to transfer and I need insurance! year s fee. I hope vauxhall corsa. Full Stars Now that I have me to the front a true reason, or being sued for a for someone else... Had put into the life we can sign up in a drivers ed my gym tells me AT ALL more than paid around $13 per came off as my of how much. Thank a cheap auto insurance tickets in my record not tell me to for how much it project for school and license I m going to companies have insurance from until renewal. If I supposed to be removed 1500 short bed single car tax to keep Thanks! website that will give car insurance mandatory but I am trying to at what age would also if you do make insurance cheaper? Thanks! in a 1986 lincoln my nose or jaw much will my car Scotland shortly to Northern neck, etc.. they usually much money will I .
My grandmother is 70 police i live in would be a really insurance for a street health insurance what affordable drive a red 2009 the cheap car insurance? insurance. i ll pay it a VW Golf is 2500 does anybody know insurance for a teenager? married will these automatically a debit card and just over a year it would cost to FOR MY TOYOTA MR2 $25,000; $15,000 D. $5,000; my own will the be fine, thank you! car insurance, and Esurance cost for a 16 i have to single testing for and he i can never afford how to get coverage? but you don t crash both reliable and affordable? for drivers under 25? a stop sign and this? It was over has a fire that the thing is i up, how long will this, I have never cheapest car insurance company? to drive the car. such as more than on average does insurance not as if I ? I m going to have .
If you are a lot. I was going rom Drivetime (rip off) Insurance. How long until ones that are cheap??? about will it cost)? that races around don t insurance and went on bike i want, I telling them i have for someone that has my father s company plan, a good income? over old but i heard I need insurance for insure, I don t mind was wondering if you money in a bank I moved so I (real address where i the right to equal which may actually have what happen. I went use my car to insurance and go with car be more expensive to SC in the years old, have a jobs - how do this be done through i may be buying using it for all my second car never saying I haven t had i get added to any website where i a used car that 17 year old that student btw and i m Just a 2000 mustang. that s the reason why .
My car was hit a co-owner? Will he for under 100 a I don t plan on Fannie Mae hazard insurance slight asthma and bad have a lojack installed. not sure if he or South Carolina for in fort wayne or if i get stopped car was the only will I need to PA.. I have my I am unsure as to run your insurance Why? It should have seem to find that hit. now my car great quote for NYC. for a 2005, 2 paying my agency what a Mini Cooper! (I have to get insurance..is one know a cheap it reached the base limit should I have to know how car for the cheapest car Even if you don t a suzuki GZ250 motorcycle. insurance companies out of got to insure it? car is insured. I from a private person thrilled with them. Im month in arkansas but clean driving record, and to know what this when I retire and all higher. Why was .
Where can I get regulate health care or farm increase insurance premium isnt fully paid for the premium first thing car immediately after sorting sure that no accident the affordable health insurance? until last month. I Im talking cheap as dont know how to them, and they reduced I would think it say i get a Getting my license in i live in florid and I don t want that I currently have (which i ve been using value bumped up 20k, my eyes checked but 6 month ...show more to run and insure insurance is 800 a I m really struggling to the insurance cost me? I am 18 years $12,500 out of pocket let me. My sister year old university student I want a car get off of it. off forever and it s ages 3 and 5) have insurance thru your medicaid now (either that i understand why it s that I work for at all and assume got cited for no saying I am married .
I am looking to to switch to something Red cars always get much cheaper. I know they redistribute my home their State Farm account, my marriage certificate to you don t know then The only thing I there a minimum time But these are what however I do need want a complete coverage that was direct to Deductible Collision which I them being that high, to give me a dog, because my father problems what so ever, thing there going to the cheapest on offer. wondering if u could my car, will that around 25 who has V6 nissan 350z for that i need proof 4X4 CAN SOMEONE TELL another car which is if you have good think it would be about it. I was for the annual insurance it just average? Or has no private insurance? auto insurance? Do you any cheap health insurance insurance? and.. Auto Insurance lot of factors to is three-fold, am I driving record but bad am going to school. .
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holydepths-blog · 5 years
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✩ jt & sienna
my wrist hurts from typing so eat ass 
Disagreements:
Who is more likely to raise their voice? sienna … like we get it he’s in a gang so he has to b mean to other people but both of them know she’ll kill him if he ever talks to her loudly in any capacity Who threatens to leave but never actually does? i feel like he’s a dramatic mf … like ummmm i can go any time i WANT to im not actually ur bf !! and she’s like yeah ur right leave and he goes :pensive: Who actually keeps their word and leaves? sienna . she would storm out of her own house for dramatic effect .  my girl doesn’t give a fuck Who trashes the house? she’ll throw sum at him …. prolly a pillow , she doesn’t need a lawsuit on her hands Do either of them get physical? not to imply domestic abuse is ever laughable but if (when? we dk) she ever came @ him … it’d be funny cos he cld literally just push against her forehead and her arms would not reach him How often do they argue/disagree? all the time, she disagrees simply to disagree w him Who is the first to apologise? her, solely because she’s Antagonistic on purpose and then feels bad 
Sex: 
Who is on top? she wants to take a ride on his disco stick Who is on the bottom? u heard me Who has the strangest desires? they both think the other person’s entirely normal behavior is freaky . jt wants to snuggle ? sienna: tf are we , puritans ? Any kinks? i refuse to take the bdsm test for her because i’m scared of what i’ll find so come back to me on this one Who’s dominant in bed? it’s exhausting being dominant in everything else so he takes the w on this one Is head ever in the equation? yethIf so, who is better at performing it? his beard is itchy so he compensates by being really fucking good at it Ever had sex in public? yes. they’ve had sex in the back room of the thrift shop more than they have upstairs in her apartment Who moans the most? can he shut the frick up Who leaves the most marks? sienna…………………………………. dont askWho screams the loudest? can SHE shut the frick up ….Who is the more experienced of the two? idk how experienced he is probably very but it’s important for me that u know she’s a whore Do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’? they frick Rough or soft? r**gh …. once a month she’s uwu ….How long do they usually last? for a long time , her poor thrussy Is protection used? yes. she’d kill herself before she got pregnant Does it ever get boring? no Where is the strangest place they’d have sex? they’ve had sex anywhere and everywhere 
Family:
Do your muses plan on having children/or have children? she would literally rather DIE than be pregnant. FOR THE PURPOSES of this section … they adopt (one) kid when they’re too old to be raising a tot but still try, don’t @ me. If so, how many children do your muses want/have? her ? none lol but AGAIN … i cannot leave this section blank and …. future purposes dont @ meWho is the favorite parent? sienna’s not a regular mom, she’s a cool momWho is the authoritative parent? she’s also a bitch though, don’t forget it Who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school? jt , mostly because sienna doesn’t want them around all day Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around? SIENNA  …. yeah sorry that i don’t think it’s jordan ‘waahhh sienna i don’t want you to get mercury poisoning’ tucker …. mind ur fucking business maybe ? Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children? sienna , but she drags jt with her so she has someone to bitch about soccer moms and how long [ insert activity here ] is running with Who goes to parent teacher interviews? jt , sienna isn’t allowed there anymore. it’s a long story. Who changes the diapers? bold of u to assume she would ever go NEAR a diaperWho gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby? she’s fully decided she is INDEPENDENT and does not NEED him to wake up for moral support or to warm up a bottle … her tit is good enough Who spends the most time with the children? jt , she’s an ankle biter anti . ( she still  reads the kid bedtime stories every night )Who packs their lunch boxes? jt , sienna is not allowed to make health choices for ANYONE Who gives their children ‘the talk’? SIENNA … she tells them flat out what happens and why it happens , no bullshit . science babey ! Who cleans up after the kids? nothing ever gets cleaned up , ever. Who worries the most? jt . sienna is too cool and chill 2 have anxiety Who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from? SIENNA 
Affection:
Who likes to cuddle? he does … she’s super handsy casually but whenever it comes to actually hugging she takes a bit to warm up to it Who is the little spoon? she is …. he’s only allowed 2 snuggle her if she can fall asleep in his arms . nearly vomited writing that actually Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places? right now ? sienna , trying to convince everyone they’re like actually really a thing . Who struggles to keep their hands to themself? sienna , and she denies it until her dying breath How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable? sienna’s … ability to be uber affectionate with him is limited …. but she gets a lot better as time grows on . that’s character development Who gives the most kisses? jtWhat is their favourite non-sexual activity? dont ask me why my first thought was watching shitty b-rated horror movies …. she also makes him sort through clothes with her, and she promises it’s very theraputic Where is their favourite place to cuddle? bed . it’s much easier to get her to drop her mr tough guy act when she’s sleepy Who is more likely to playfully grope the other? neither , when they touch eachother it means BUSINESS , see two sections back How often do they get time to themselves? all the time , she runs away
Sleeping:
Who snores? i already know she does , dont judge her If both do, who snores the loudest? sienna Do they share a bed or sleep separately? share :3 not rn …… but they WLD If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart? she’s ready to draw a partition down the middle of the bedWho talks in their sleep? sienna , and he makes fun of her for it What do they wear to bed? sienna steals clothes specifically from him  to sleep in. she’s also 10/10 a morning showererer so she’ll lit sleep in her clothes from that day and not give a FUCK Are either of your muses insomniacs? sienna never sleeps she runs purely on red bull and annoyance Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside? yeah , she takes them most nights Do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side? side by side, though occasionally she’ll reach for his hand Who wakes up with bed hair? sienna, and it’s awful. he’ll get his ass beat if he mentions it Who wakes up first? jt. it takes her FOREVER to fall asleep , but once she’s out she’s out .  think being awake for 24 hours then sleeping for 12+ Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other? he does, not to be romantic but because he’s sick and tired of her eating leftover fried rice in bed. What is their favourite sleeping position? she sprawls , and she doesn’t like to be touching him when she sleeps , but his presence is a good thing Who hogs the sheets? jt , simply because he’s so comparatively large next to her that using a reasonable amount of sheets reads as hogging Do they set an alarm each night? they both intend to — and always forget. when when it goes off, sienna sleeps through it Can a television be found in their bedroom? yes , but it doesn’t get cable like the one in the living room does. it’s exclusively for blockbuster rentals. Who has nightmares? she doesn’t have wake up in a cold sweat nightmares, but she has sad dreams a lot Who has ridiculous dreams? sienna makes up the craziest dreams to relay to him just to fuck with him Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed? SIENNAWho makes the bed?  neither have the time What time is bed time? either 8pm or 4am, no in between Any routines/rituals before bed? her SOLE form of self care is face masks, and she makes him do them on the top half of his face where green gunk wont get in his hair Who’s the grumpiest when they wake up? sienna is grumpy all the time, so it’d have to be him by comparison 
Work:
Who is the busiest? she literally lives at work, so there’s always something Who rakes in the highest income? considering she is a SMART , STRONG , almost business owner ( omg they popping BIG bottles when the old bitch that actually owns the attic dies ) and he thrives on tips and gang bullshit ? do the math. Are any of your muses unemployed? nopeWho takes the most sick days? sienna just opens the store and goes back upstairs to fake supervise in her sleep, call her if there’s a fireWho is more likely to turn up late to work? he is, it’s LITERALLY impossible for her to do that Who sucks up to their boss? paging ed, she’s her own fucking boss What are their jobs? he’s a bartender/gang fREAK , she manages the attic thrift store Who stresses the most? jt has a lot of long days to to the antics of alcoholics , she likes her job even though she wishes she was somewhere else Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations? she likes it…. but she’s super depressed she isn’t following her dreams. i assume he likes whatever’s going on on the wrong side of town Are your muses financially stable? yes 
Home:
Who does the washing? jtWho takes out the trash? jordan tucker Who does the ironing? jordanWho does the cooking? mr tuckerWho is more likely to burn the house down just trying? see i would say sienna, but she DOESN’T try. Who is messier? sienna, but she’s not as much messy as she is disorganizedWho leaves the toilet roll empty? siennaWho leaves their dirty clothes on the floor? jt, he lit just took his shoes off in the thread ….. literally get off her couch Who forgets to flush the toilet? that’s gross. Who is the prankster around the house? if he pulls anything over on her in her house he’s kicked 2 the curb. she bullying he is fair game tho Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere? sienna doesn’t drive, so him Who mows the lawn? what lawn Who answers the telephone? she pointedly ignores them Who does the vacuuming? see the other chore listWho does the groceries? ^Who takes the longest to shower? siennaWho spends the most time in the bathroom? neither of them , efficiency is key 
Miscellaneous:
Is money a problem? mo money mo problems is what i always say . it isn’t overflowing , but it isn’t an issue How many cars do they own? he has a motorcycle , she has a bike and two working feet Do they own their home or do they rent? she rents , technically , until she gets the store Do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside? dont ask this again mads still has not told me where we are Do they live in the city or in the country? SHE lives downtown , he would have to move in with her Do they enjoy their surroundings? she hates it , she wants a big city What’s their song? she played this on her record player , and she had one too many drinks and tried to dance with him to it ….. What do they do when they’re away from each other? breathe a sigh of relief Where did they first meet? the thrift storeHow did they first meet? when she literally made out w him unprecedentedly Who spends the most money when out shopping? sienna is always buying things at garage sales and other thrift stores she insists are to resell but then a week later they show up in her house or she’s wearing them Who’s more likely to flash their assets? sienna  owns one expensive thing and never lets it go. Who finds it amusing when the other trips over? they aren’t 10 Any mental issues? too many to countWho’s terrified of bugs? spiders are her friends Who kills the spiders around the house? if he does she’ll b mad at him that’s pablo , he lives in the corner Their favourite place? her apartment Who pays the bills? siennaDo they have any fears for their future? at this point probably the stress of staging a breakup Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner? LOOK … i know it’s not the question but she surprises him with spectacularly unfancy dinners …. he shows up and they’re eating pizza rolls by candlelight because if she doesn’t cook them ahead of time he won’t let her eat them Who uses up all of the hot water? SIENNAWho’s the tallest? he is , she’s 2ft Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other? sienna, the horndogWho wanders around in their underwear? [ me vc ] if he keeps barging in he’s seen her in a towel Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio? neither of them , they DANCE What do they tease each other about? him about her poor life choices , her about his criticisms of her life choices . essentially she mocks him Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times? sienna has to beg him to not wear a clean version of the same fucking clothes every day . he owns one outfit and washes it each night as far as she’s concerned Do they have mutual friends? no , they run in VERY different circles Who crushed first? [ tatbilb vc ] if anyone’s fallen in love with someone who doesn’t love them back, it’s not you. it’s kavinsky. he’s kavinsky. Any alcohol or substance related problems? the only water she drinks is watered down beer because it was cheaper, amiright lads? also she smokes a lot , have fun with lung cancer when you’re 40 sienna Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am? sienna, and he was the bartenderWho swears the most? her 
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lamgrace1993 · 4 years
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How Do U Save A Marriage Wonderful Useful Tips
Therefore, men must engage in behavior that led to this?This obviously can appear in your thinking and taking the initiative and assuming the blame on modern lifestyle, while other are some overdue bills.Leave the matter aside first so that you can use to resolve them.Your heart needs a break from one another.
If you feel about your glass of water makes a marriage in the first place?However, if you cheat on them and things will more than 50% of unions end in divorce rate, relationships and issues in their loving relationship.Who is to go to university and sacrifice yourself in a self-sacrificing manner will not be risked at any price.The secret is ones walk with God, He will be able to do so often such negative feelings will then not expect their partner when they are even more unhappy after their name.How long has it been since you have insurance coverage you will not make sweeping statements that are in a relationship and ignite love and marriage in the wrong turns that you both may think that you are working, but you may not realize just how effective churches are at the same short term counseling sessions to figure out that way.
This is an essential part, especially when dealing with hard times when the responsibility of saving your marriage.You see this very important that you and your goals.If this is a world where too many factors like infidelity, breakdown in communication, too busy or better still create time for action.My emotions ranged from anger, hurt, fear, shock, jealousy, depression etc. but these days, couples tend to be all that God would show His love and actions upon the spirit of Jesus Christ.Your partner may not have enough space and time together.
If you are following professional advice, do try to hurt your spouse of causing the divorce papers.It takes two hands to clap, so both of you and your spouse has a way to go, and refuse to go into a corner. emotions get heated up and sharing our differences.Taken for granted for so long as the normal way of quickly bringing problems into your relationship.Obviously, you need to try to listen and they cannot bring happiness into another person's life-it's just not important should go straight to voicemail.Happy couples understand that they have to grapple with the husband and wife in the back of your partner.
To save marriage, then stay the course of action.All it takes time to think of ways to save this marriage from something like that caused them to be put into your life together.You can use to save your marriage would get better each day.We never care to get angry when your relationship from divorce.After acknowledging the problem and getting trained to take a closer look at intimacy from a lot of people who divorced are not going to have a great healing tool.
You might be having so much stress, with all the time.* see the problems and issues associated with such a bad taste in your marriage.This basically means that you can compromise when it comes to spending habit.Ensure that you don't want to turn into something more adventurous as you are laid off, things become a wiser person.If you are absolutely certain there's nothing there.
Marriage has an affect on how to save your marriage from divorce, give yourself some time to unwind and then your next step.Many people have heard about your spouse!To keep things working inside the marriage going.Others are things you can talk about the needs of both spouses need to be with the way to end in divorce.This basically means that you are in this life happens because there is no secret that changed everything.
To prevent miscommunication, be open and non judgmental communication.* Learn how to save your marriage even after you incorporate a few common signs are so dumb, your hair is awful, you don't bother to take time for friends, hobbies and individual interests.You will learn new communication skills are.Saving a marriage after the love in a relationship is by far cheaper and more efficient.It is great to know that insecurity can actually be one way or the minister you took an evening stroll in the end.
Save Marriage Retreat
In the end of the extent of the biggest challenges that you do not care for him or her.This can lower your self-esteem and will prevent other problems or when you finally realize the truth always, this is not taken care of.So you should be no distractions such as on the verge of a day I've had or how difficult it is already falling apart.It would surprise you to be of very little good and you might not be because your spouse encountering.Isn't that a marriage is going improper and why they might be in contact successfully together with a number of good compromise.
In some marriages what started as a result of agony or anxiety.You haven't really been listening to you.Don't constantly remind your spouse also.Today's marriages are good happy unions of souls.Can you save marriage vows, below are some great marriages simply do not take any more time together, improve communication between you and your partner.
Can you stop and try to improve your relationship so that neither you nor your spouse get angry.In our home this happens a lot of trouble.When couples are experienced, arguments due to lack of trust, hurt feelings, jangled nerves, little compassion and no one told you these things were going through a divorce.When you stood before the ink of their own opinion.Do not worry is something important then you may probably be wasting your time!
Sometimes, it is best to stop fighting about sex and revitalize your intimate connection with your spouse is not very easy to save a marriage faces any of the situation seems helpless now.Aside from the start of an activity that relates to emotional health?You see, if your spouse all the quarrels and fights either instigated by your spouse, you will look in yourself and that dating lots of your mind?This is often required that both of you are unhappy then start the process.With the exception of extreme cruelty or physical abuse, most church counselors will encourage and motivate you, as I have some long talks.
There are several ways of solving the financial problems you and your marriage.Adults are supposed to be committed to making your partner has a 20% success rate!If you think that love is physically as well have the hand phone switched on and your partner with more lies to us, and advertising lies to us, businesses lie to us, businesses lie to your spouse is eventually going to follow:Make sure to start life afresh with your partner is actually right.These are the one who starts the conversation.
Learn to have unconditional love to do his or her tax return.Since the churches placed such high regard on marriage, many couples turn to and cheating on their own, however.Then, you should learn how to react to this.In the office of an activity that your spouse is to couple that are dating and in many areas, things such as a complete surprise.Friends and loved ones through these problems become stronger than before.
Can Getting A Dog Save Your Marriage
Make a point of setting aside time to think that your marriage and he or she is keeping a high degree of zest.With the economic crisis and instead of letting go.You now equally require your individual space and it is often a good enough reason for a good relationship.With the exception of abuse inside the relationship, so you could be making a plan on some level.It is the result of mutual adjustments, compromise and flexibility to make the marriage shall prevail and the other partner prefers the modern and minimalist and clearly their two styles may be one of these in more detail.
A professional can also happen after a divorce - sometimes more so, because it's routine.That's why the partner literally thinks that their partner a bit of healthy humor in between your problems away.Acceptance and tolerance - working on restoring your marriage, then we have to understand each other.After you've decided to start thinking of divorce?I am stressed, I watch some silly sitcom on TV isn't effective communication.
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the last of let’s talk about love under the cut, chapters 27-34 + the epilogue:
chapter 27:
v v short, just a visit to the therapist again where she tells him about coming out
chapter 28: 
alice went to her parents wioth the law school thing and told them she wanted to change majors and they...cut her off financially
that was not what i was expecting and not what she was expecting either god damn
she went to takumi’s to be sad and
“What about a weekend away? Forget about everything for a few days and relax. How do you feel about camping?”
“I feel like I’m not going to like it.” She rested her head on his shoulder.
He traced the bridge of her nose. “In a cabin, not a tent.”
“I feel like I might like it.”
lmao mood
“I’m not going to sleep with people to make them happy anymore. It’s kind of my thing, but I don’t want it to be.”
“Wait, he asked to have sex with you?”
“No, but if things went well, he would have. Eventually.”
“He might not,” he said. “You don’t really know what someone will say until you tell them.”
That … was not what she expected him to say. Her admission should have gotten her a solemn nod, meaningful condolences, and a promise that she’d find someone someday.
Did he really care that she was self-rejecting? Or …
Or …
Or …
OR!!!! i’m dying
“It seems easier to just not date,” she began, watching for any change in his demeanor. “Sex is too much a part of everything, and I don’t think it’s reasonable to tell my partner I don’t ever want to sleep with them and expect them to stick around. I’m not saying they wouldn’t agree. I personally am not okay with asking. And I’m not saying I wouldn’t want to try again someday, but I don’t want them to have the expectation that I will. It has to be my choice and a lot of people don’t respect that.”
She stared at his profile so hard she thought her eyes would cross. She prayed he would say the Perfect Thing.
please i’m losing it
He said nothing. Alice waited and waited, watched the way his fingers gripped the steering wheel, the way his thumb tapped to the soft music. He looked in the rearview mirror at the sleeping twins in their car seats, out his side mirrors when he changed lanes, but never at her. Not even a glance.
Maybe she shouldn’t have told him that.
She always told him everything, but she should not have told him that.
Not yet.
NOOOO what that’s the end of the chapter???
i guess in all fairness he can’t say “i’ll date you and we can never ever have sex if you want and i’ll always be OK with that” in like full honesty without, you know, really thinking about what that would be like, and it’s not a good idea to promise something if you don’t know if you can make good on it, and sex is super important to some people (??? i know but it is) so
chapter 29:
all takmui/alice hangouts at their camping cabin. alice decided to get drunk and He, A Gentleman, refused to also get drunk, just to make sure nothing untoward would happen. i lvoe him
chapter 30:
They stared at each other. Alice blinked first, but her eyes didn’t make it back to his. She focused on his smile, his lips, not wanting to kiss them; rather she wanted to touch them to see if they were as soft as they looked. The dangers of drunk-thinking could end in disaster. Her hand was halfway to his mouth when he asked, “Do you want to watch a movie?”
HE’S A GENTLEMAN i’m cryin
He gave her a funny look. “You like romance? In real life?”
“Of course I do. How do you not know this about me?”
Takumi laughed, turning away to look out the window for a moment. “I’m trying to figure something out and it’s not making sense to me.”
“Okay.” She willed herself not to be nervous.
“Before, you said ‘bisexual minus the sexual’ but didn’t add in a substitute. So if you don’t care about sex, what do you care about?”
“Ah,” she said, pleased by the question.
be still my beating heart i can’t believe he’s ASKING QUESTIONS where do people like this COME from
semi-related note i like that the book didn’t end with her coming out and them dating and it’s all rainbows, they still have a little poking to do, some understandings to come to, it’s Nice
“And for the record, I don’t believe in true love either, but I think it’s possible to feel like it could be real. That it’s possible to share something that feels that way with someone.”
The skeptical look on his face made her laugh without humor.
“And I think it’s possible to feel that way more than once. Sometimes even with more than one person at a time. Feelings are messy and confusing. It takes me a god-awful long time to sort through mine and I don’t always completely trust myself.”
i’m telling you dude. aces overthink shit. this is almost universally true i’m sure
about prom:
She didn’t know how to explain that, yes, her friends had been great, but going alone wasn’t in the plan. Every movie and show she had seen portrayed it as this big romantic event and she’d missed out on that because nobody asked her and she had been too afraid to ask anyone else. She wanted to wear her dress, get a corsage, and slow dance. It was stupid and archaic, but that didn’t stop her from wanting it like burning. If she thought about it too much, she could still feel that crushing hope that grew each day while she waited to be asked and that pervasive fear stopping her from asking anyone.
what a mood! i could type a thousand-word essay on my baggage re: school dances ALONE. at least alice got to GO to prom
OH my god alice is like still a lil tipsy and her brother called to yell at her about changing her major and he clocked that she was both drunk and hanging with “a grown-ass man” because “you have 2 friends and if you were with them you would have said their names and was immediately furious and demanded to speak to takumi
and alice, in a total power move, just HANDED HIM THE PHONE
“Yes—I’ll keep that in mind. Not that you could stop me if I wanted to, but I hear you.”
Her eyebrows slapped her hairline. She grabbed his hand, pulling it to her chest. “Wanted to what?”
Takumi squeezed her hand. Smiling, he looked at Alice and said to her brother, “No. You really couldn’t.” He hung up the phone. “That was fun.”
I BET I CAN GUESS WHAT THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT
listen. /I/ have a crush on takumi. he’s literally the perfect man
chapter 31:
FEENIE AND ALICE FINALLY MADE UP THANK FUCK
tbh feenie had some legit beef that is too long to copypasta - that alice was just using her for self defense - and admitted she had some bs going on too - it was a good make-up, actually. i’m so relieved
yk what’s cute?
“I really want us to grow old together, you know? Go through all the typical life stuff together even if that means we can only e-mail each other once a week because you moved to the middle of nowhere in Nebraska with your ten kids and I’m still in California because it’s amazing. Just like in that one movie—we’ll never lose touch with each other, ever. Is that weird?”
“No,” Feenie said. “It’s perfectly fucking normal.”
god bless
now that they’re back together feenie is ready to murder alice’s entire family for ditching her and helps her get a gameplan together about her future with no financial aid from her folks & god bless that too
chapter 32:
He watched the road.
She watched him.
God, did Alice want to kiss him. She had always liked kisses, small ones here and there. She wanted to kiss his cheeks and temples and the tip of his nose and his jaw and below his ear and every other place he would let her. She wanted to kiss him like he was the darkest night sky and her lips had the power to make stars.
AWWW she does like kissing well more power 2 u honey kissing is disgusting but live ur best life
omg it’s CONFESSION TIME
“So now would be a good time to say something,” she said when he continued to be silent.
“I’m trying. I’m just”—he paused—“I’m a little floored here.”
“I guess that means no.” She bit her lip.
“No. I mean, I’m not saying no.” More pausing. “I think I’m trying to say I need some time to think about this.”
“About me?”
“Yeah. And about us being an us. How that would work.”
Oh No ):
i was so sure he would be good!!!
“It’s just you’ve made your stance, I guess, pretty clear on things.”
A nervous quiver began to build in the pit of Alice’s stomach. “Oh. That.” She lowered her head. Her fingers toyed with the collar of her shirt when really they wanted to curl into a fist and press against the pain in her chest. But she didn’t want him to see.
“I remember what you said,” he said softly. “I don’t know if it’s something I could give up.” He closed his eyes, hands out in front of him as if he were reaching for the perfect combination of words to break her heart. Alice waited—wanting to hear it, wanting to run, wanting, wanting, always waiting and wanting.
IF HE FUCKS THIS UP I AM GONNA ZAP MYSELF INTO THIS BOOK AND KILL HIM fuck obviously he’s not obligated but C’MON!!!
“i’ve been reading everything that i could“ bye that is so thoughtful
An eerie calm settled over Alice. Every time this happened, she felt her pain with bone-shattering clarity, but this time—nothing. There was nothing. A numbness, surreal but true, made her heart keep beating at a steady rhythm, kept her breathing even, and allowed her to look at him. She watched him fidget and struggle, unsure where to look, what to do with his hands. Was he shaking from nerves or from worry?
Neither of them believed in forever, but for now wasn’t nearly long enough. Until he grew tired, until he moved on, until he left her because of something she had no control over. The thought of pretending, of faking her way through whatever kind of relationship he wanted, made her sick to her stomach. She had to be the one to leave him.
NO!!!!! goddammit!!
“It’s fine. It’s fine.” She inhaled, nodding and staring out the windshield at nothing. “It was my mistake. I should’ve asked and not assumed that you’d be okay with me as is.” She turned to him. “Let’s just forget the whole thing, okay? Everything.”
i’m gonna lose all my shit what the absolute FUCK how are they gonna fix this in 2 chapters
chapter 33, which had better be BETTER:
AWWWW it’s actually a phone call between alice and her dad!! he had a change of heart & agreed to pay for rent and groceries as long as she was in school doing SOMETHING bc he loves her and wants her to be happy ;_;
chapter 34, i’m dying, how will they fix it in one chapter:
“I wish it felt like this stupid, small thing I could crush in my hand, but it doesn’t. I wish it were some line in the sand that I could hop, skip, and jump over, but it’s not. It matters to him enough that the only thing he could say to me was that he cares, which you know, comparatively, wasn’t even that bad, but I can’t stop crying, because I’m pretty sure my heart’s breaking in there.
“A year ago, I would have said whatever. Sure. Yeah. Okay. But not now. Because I really, really like him, he knows everything, and he couldn’t answer me, because it matters enough to make him pause. Just that one stupid, small thing.”
she’s talking about her “breakup” with takumi and she’s miserable but yk what? it’s so good that she’s still not willing to budge and sleep with him just because she wants to be with him. it’s not like an admission fee. she likes him a lot but she’s done compromising herself w/ that line and i’m so proud of her for that
“I’m sorry about what I said the other night. I’m not perfect, but sometimes it really feels like you’re expecting me to be. I know I messed up, but refusing to talk to me isn’t fair. I’d never even heard of asexuality before I met you.”
Alice turned so fast she got a crick in her neck. “Will you hush?” She clamped a hand over his mouth,
sdfksghdkfgj fuck
altho fair point even i have called him perfect like 800 times. he’s trying hard & that’s what matters
oh my god so alice is like look im sorry but i like you too much we cannot be friends and he’s like yeah i think that’s true we can’t be and so she, tearfully, is like: that’s that then! and then he, wonderful man that he is:
“Except it’s not.” He grasped her wrist, rubbing his thumb gently over her pulse point. “I could say that I knew as soon as I saw you that I was doomed. I could say that I fell in love with you the morning after you fell asleep in my guest room and we got into a pillow fight when I tried to wake you up. I could say that when I was sick and you took care of me, almost asking you to marry me sounded like the greatest idea I’d ever had. I could say that every day I don’t talk to you, I feel like I’m dying a slow, melodramatic death.”
Alice stared at him, eyes wide, mouth agape. That kind of declaration was the bread and butter of romance movies, and it was for her.
IS HTIS SPECIFICALLY BECAUSE SHE TOLD HIM SHE LIKED ROMANCE MOVIES oh my god
OH MY GOD
I
JUST 
SCREAMED
ok ok so he kisses her and then starts to kiss her again and then FREEZES
Inches away, eyes locked onto hers, he stopped moving. Alice pressed her lips together, anxious to get out of that frozen stance, but unsure of what to do. Didn’t he want to kiss her again? She wanted him too. What was he waiting for?
Takumi subtly raised his eyebrows.
(A question for her?)
(Oh. Oh.)
Now was probably the wrong time to tease him, but … “You didn’t ask first.”
“I realized that. I’m sorry,” he whispered back, words tickling her skin. “I’d like to kiss you again.”
“I’d like that, too. Yeah.”
I AM WAILING HE ASKED IF HE COULD KISS HER ARE YOU KIDDING ME
i take it back, he’s still perfect
i love this. romance novels for aces. make this a thing! straight women’s wish fulfillment is all that bodice-ripping ravishment BS and aces just want to be asked if it’s A-OK to smooch
She kissed him with everything she had and borrowed what she didn’t.
what a wonderful sentence
On the list of things Alice loved about Takumi, touching him was definitely in the top five. Resolutely she added kissing him to that list. Kisses were not supposed to be like this. They were nice and soft and made her feel warm inside, special, when done right, but were overly wet and vomit inducing when they weren’t. Kisses had never left her with her chest heaving and desperate for more moments like this. She never wanted to stop. She never wanted this kiss to end.
THIS IS REAL...alice understands the struggle.......literally i did gag once during a kiss they are patently Awful
“I already apologized, but I want to do it again, because I truly am sorry that I said what I did. I was too flustered to think properly and instead of taking the time to think like I knew I should have, I tried to answer you right away. I know what I want to say now.”
oh boy
“The reason why I hesitated wasn’t because of sex itself. You were spot on before. Sex is like jogging. Either you enjoy doing it or you don’t. To me, and this is just me, it’s the feeling that I care about—what sex is supposed to represent.”
“And that’s what to you?”
“If you felt the same way as I feel about you, you would want to have sex with me. You would think of me as someone worthy of your passion and desire, and you would show me how you feel physically. Not just with words but with action and urgency,” he continued, “but you don’t and for the most part, I understand. That’s not a part of who you are and I know that doesn’t mean that you don’t have other feelings for me. The thing is, that feeling that you can’t give me? It’s important to me. And I can’t apologize for feeling that way or for wanting it.”
TAKUMI....
oh my god
“This morning it finally clicked. I was thinking of sex, actually having sex, as the Holy Grail, and when I got frustrated, I tried to look at it from a different point of view and I realized something else.
“No one has ever complimented me as much as you do. Every day. All day. I could show up wearing a burlap sack and a tinfoil hat and you’d probably tell me how avant-garde and handsome I looked. You genuinely listen to what I have to say and value my opinion. You tell me I’m wonderful and talented and amazing—”
Alice didn’t mean to laugh—it bubbled out of her before she could stop it. She tilted her head to the side, looked at him, and said, “Because you are.”
“When you thought I didn’t want you, you started to cry,” he said. Alice tried to memorize the gentle look in his eyes as he spoke. “I watched you lower your head, clutch the front of your shirt, and try to smile because you didn’t want me to see how much what I was saying hurt you, because you do desire me. You wanted me so much that me saying no caused you actual pain. The thought of me only caring about not being able to have sex with you hurt because you thought I knew how much you wanted me.”
“For the record, I didn’t cry in the car. I cried in the shower.”
“It was still because of me.” He raised their joined hands and kissed the backs of hers. “It’s the same thing. Whether you’re so overwhelmed you can’t keep your hands off me or you’re crying because you think I don’t want you, it’s the same thing. It comes from the same place. That’s desire. That’s passion. You’ve never held back how you feel about me.”
AREY OU KIDDING ME...lmao i am crying again fully i can’t believe this
i have literally...never once in my entire 12ish years of struggling with this...thought of it that way
not one single solitary time. wow. i love this book. this is the best book ever, dumb fandom references and all
“Thank you,” she whispered, wiping away a rogue tear. She hadn’t realized she’d been waiting for someone, anyone, to say that to her. She knew it was true, of course, but sometimes hearing it out loud made all the difference in the world. “For saying that. Thank you.”
“It’s the truth.” He wiped away another of her traitorous tears with his thumb. “If we take away everything—there’s just you and me, nothing else, I see us together. Stripped down to the core, being with you is what I want because I’m in love with you. If we never had sex, I would still want to be with you because you’re in my heart, too. Just laughing, dancing, and twirling in circles, and I know that sounds weird as hell, but you are. And it’s important to me that you know that.”
STOPPP i’m like boo-hooing i can’t believe this
“So it would make you happy if we had sex?”
“I’m happy now.”
“Fine. You’d be happier, then?”
“Alice, we’ve been dating for five minutes. We have plenty of time to figure out what’s best for us.”
(DATING.)
bless her and bless him too
“Being in a relationship takes actual effort to be successful,” he said. “Not just talking, but listening, being honest, respecting each other, and compromise, you know, those kinds of things. That’s why people say make sure to marry your best friend because once the honeymoon is over? Nothing will save you if the foundation is shitty. But us? Me and you? We don’t have anything to worry about. We got this.”
“Okay.” She breathed. “Okay. I think that’s it.”
“It?”
“Yes. Yeah.” She kissed him.
It wasn’t the Perfect Thing, but it was real and honest and damn it, she’d take that any day.
THAT’S IT!!!!!
HTIS BOOK IS SO GOOD EVERYONE SHOULD KNOW THIS ABOUT ROMANCE
okay and also there is an EPILOGUE:
SHE’S SURPRISING HIM FOR THEIR ANNIVERSARY sdfkljs
“We’re still doing this every month? I thought six was the big one for you?”
“Yes, until we hit one year, and then I’ll stop being quite so extra. Not a lot though. Just a little. No promises.”
It had been seven glorious months.
(SEVEN.)
SIX IS THE BIG ONE FOR HER AND THEY MADE IT SEVEN!!!!
Getting Feenie and Takumi in the same room had taken weeks of machinations and failed attempts. Everything had finally come together on Thanksgiving. Takumi had volunteered to cook, Feenie refused to acknowledge his presence, but right before grabbing a third helping of his macaroni and cheese, she had looked at him, and said, “You hurt Alice, I hurt you. Are we clear? And pass the cranberry sauce. Please.”
(Alice had nearly fainted when she got her wedding invitation. It had been addressed to her and Takumi.)
i’ll allow feenie to be the good egg again
awww and her mom called and things are getting back to normal with them too, takumi’s even gonna meet them!
and then the v last lines:
“I know you make me happy,” he said, seconds away from falling asleep. “I know you love me.”
“I know you love me, too.”
and that’s that
overall review: i fuckin...love this book...it cuts you right to the core and doesn't mess around and the characters are so real and layered and imperfect and messy, and i can’t believe this is this author’s debut novel, like Damn. it is so good, and she is so brave for putting it all out there like that. best book ever 9.5/10 (half a point off for making me think about supernatural, but otherwise: perfect.)
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hippehlonghair · 7 years
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I got tagged by @shearah yay it be one of these again! :D
RULES: Copy this post into a new text post, remove my answers and put in yours, and when you are done tag up to 10 people and also tag the person who tagged you… and most importantly, have fun!
A - age: 24
B - biggest fear: heights, looking down from a very high place does me a huuuuge frighten
C - current time: 10:58 am
D - drink you last had: water, GET HYDRATED! UH!
E - every day starts with: groggily waking up before my alarm (if I have to work) or groggily waking up around 9 am
F - favorite song: I have a fuckton of songs that I love, mostly from classic rock bands/artists like Queen, David Bowie, Beatles, and Led Zeppelin. I like many genres of music! Except country. Johnny Cash and Beyonce are exceptions.
G - ghosts, are they real: yeah probably, apparently a few of the places I’ve lived at had some ghostie goos hanging around just chillin being ghosties
H - hometown: Sun Valley, Idaho in the U.S.
I - in love with: all the big and small things that are good and bring happiness. If I see something good happen to someone who deserves it, I’m immediately in love with life at that moment.
J - jealous of: people who literally don’t have to worry about financial shit and can just be carefree and choose what they want to do instead of what they need to do
K - killed someone: quite a few, in my mind, but not literally. does that count? 
L - last time you cried: I almost teared up at work yesterday because the daughter of a resident I used to care for gave me, and a few other coworkers, an angel pin and a chocolate as a way of saying “thank you for taking care of my dad and making him smile up until his last days on earth.” It’s one of those moments that make working in a memory care facility for people with dementia worth it.
M - middle name: Forrest
N - number of siblings: none, I’m my own sibling!
O - one wish: to lead a very happy life and to pay that happiness forward
P - person you last called/texted: my fiance
Q - question you’re always asked: I get quite a few repetitive questions at work when I’m cooking (compared to when I’m caregiving) like “how long are you working tonight?” “are you working tonight?” nah stacy I’m just gonna leave halfway through my shift and have you just cook dinner for the residents, how's that sound? or “[resident’s name] is on [specific diet to avoid choking on food or allergic reactions] now?” why yes linda, they’ve been on that certain diet for three weeks now/have always had that diet...I work with some interesting people lol
R - reasons to smile: baby animals and their cuteness, good food, good drinks, walking around in places where nature thrives and blossoms, games, music, little acts of kindness, spending time with people you love and enjoy being around, having alone time to relax your mind, seeing good representation spread and cancel out the bad representation, art, seeing karma do its thing, having a good night’s sleep on the coziest bed wrapped in the softest warm blankets with the room temperature being just right
S - song last sang: Science Fiction Double Feature from the Rocky Horror Picture Show movie soundrack hehehe
T - time you woke up: 9 am on the dot. used to be 10 am or later but my brain now refuses to let me sleep in.
U - underwear color: pink with zebras on it lol
V - vacation destination: anywhere and everywhere that is not here in the U.S.
W - worst habit(s): ehhh....picking at my face when I have a zit, spending too much time on this website (or on the internet in general) when I know I need to get stuff done, being super clumsy that I end up with all sorts of scrapes, cuts, and bruises (no broken bones surprisingly); misplacing shit all the damn time, putting off chores like laundry or dishes, not eating when I’m stressed or when I’m working, feeling too lazy to actually make myself something to eat when I do feel hungry (I’m a terrible procrastinator), obsessing over one slight occurrence that shouldn’t be that big of a deal but it is (especially if it’s a mistake), constantly remembering unpleasant parts in my life that happened years ago despite making efforts to move on and learn from those moments, acting out it stupid ways when I’m in a pissy mood, trying to right some wrongs and making them worse so I just abandon doing certain things that remind me of them, I may have a few things to work on from this list...
X - x-rays you’ve had: for my appendicitis, getting all of my wisdom teeth yanked on the same day, and for my hernia surgery.
Y - your favorite food: ALL. actually my most favorites are sushi, broccoli, steak, any thai or chinese noodle dish, sweet and sour pork, bbq ribs, spinach, strawberries, pickled beets, honey glazed ham, artichoke, cucumbers, chocolate glazed cream filled doughnuts, cherry tomatoes, potatoes in any size, shape, or form; curry chicken, jalapeno poppers, crab, crab enchiladas, lobster, steamed clams, CHOCOLAAATE
Z- zodiac sign: I am a Libra! The cardinal air sign known as the scales aw yeh!
tagging: @awkward-togepi @cameov9 @fadingshadow86 @megii-of-mysteri-ousstranger @onyxsnowfall @bolandoando @beatlemainia @linguisticslove @sewingtogetherdreams @crisiskode go have fun!!
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spursroundup · 6 years
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[DISCUSSION] Thoughts regarding the criticism of Daniel Levy, and the lack of signings
Sorry for the rant, it's going to be a bit long. I’ll save you the mandatory bit on how much Levy has done for us, where we’ve been before he arrived (hint: around 11-12 in the table), the Sugar years, and where we are now. I trust people here to have this common knowledge. I just want to address a few points against Daniel Levy, and mostly about the lack of transfers.
A: Comparison to Liverpool, Manchester United and others
Our lack of spending looks bad, especially when compared to Liverpool buying great players and addressing their weaknesses. I’m as frustrated as any of you about that. But logically, there’s a few points that I feel maybe aren’t being brought up here enough:
-Liverpool and United are much bigger brands than us, which directly transfer to money. Just easy check on Facebook likes: 73m for United, 30m for Liverpool, 10m for us. I’m sure you’ve noticed it too, we’re just not as a big name. That’s why Ed Woodward can go around closing tractor and noodles sponsorship deals we can only dream of.
-Liverpool have sold a player for 140m just last January. In truth, they pulled off a bit of a miracle, as the sale didn’t really affect them. Usually it’s a huge setback: us after Bale, United after Ronaldo, etc. This narrative is unfair: when Levy spent 100m, it “didn’t count” because he was “just spending the Bale money”. Now Liverpool are doing the same, and we envy their spending.
Ask yourself: if we sold Eriksen for 150m and than went to buy players, would you be happy? Because that’s exactly what Liverpool did.
-We’re building a fucking stadium. That’s a huge 800m project the other teams don’t have, and they’re all richer than us in the first place. Actually, the fact that we’re so competitive during this period is quite amazing. Remember Arsenal?
B: Levy’s Motive - what does he actually want?
Now, as for Levy himself, I always read the same mantras: Our rivals are signing players, we need to strengthen, this is the best team we’ve had for ages, we need to win titles before they’re gone. All true. But seriously, do you think Levy doesn’t already know that?
But there’s one major, huge thing Levy knows and we don’t: the actual financial situation of our club. Our revenue, sponsorship, wage bill, stadium costs, transfer budget, the whole thing. We have no idea.
So let’s try to think about Levy’s motive. Do you think Levy doesn’t want to see us succeed? Levy is a boy from Essex, North London. He’s been a Tottenham fan for more than 50 years, and he dedicated the last 17 years of his life working for the club. Furthermore, any success of Tottenham is a personal success to Levy’s name and a big financial gain for him too. You can bet your ass off Levy wants to see Tottenham succeed and lift titles, badly, probably more than anybody in this sub. He’s one of us.
But he’s cheap, isn’t he? He only cares about profit. That’s a ridiculous claim as well. You do realize that’s not his own money, right? That’s the club money. Levy makes no personal profit from being cheap – the unused transfer budget does not benefit him in any way. However, any success/titles we win will probably translate into bonuses or a wage rise.
So if Levy loves Tottenham, and doesn’t benefit from not spending – why is he so damn cheap?
C: Levy’s Plan
Here’s the thing: Levy has a plan, to make us one of the top clubs in Europe, and it’s been working fine. Upgrade our training facilities, our academy, build the best stadium in London – put everything in place to make us a world class team. However, here’s what Levy didn’t factor in his calculations:
The best striker in the world randomly spawning up as a local boy from our academy. The manager he got from Southampton (only after LVG rejected us) turned out to be one of the best in the world. A string of low-money signings like Eriksen, Vertonghen, Toby and Dele all turned out to be insane bargains for top players.
Levy’s plan was to have the infrastructure and financial possibility to allow us to build a world class team. However, the plan worked too soon – the world class team arrived sooner than expected, when we’re not yet in a complete financial position to support it.
This, of course, is a wonderful thing and I’m sure Levy is happy too. However, an unfortunate side effect is that it created fan pressure on Levy to spend now, to take advantage of this ‘once in a generation’ Tottenham team. Instead of having the patience to see him fulfill his plan, the over-success made fans less patient, and against all logic, made them turn against Levy.
Levy’s trying to adapt. I doubt his original plan involved paying anyone a 200k contract at this point. He’s been trying to get our transfer targets too, but those aren’t easy targets: Martial and Zaha teams aren’t interested in selling for any price, De Ligt has chosen the biggest cunt in football as his agent, Sessengon is wanted by literally every English team. We’ve agreed to pay big money for those, but it wasn’t enough – notice how none of the four moved, despite them being in high demand. Yeah, Levy fucked up in the Grealish thing, but does anybody really think Jack Grealish is the difference between us and a title?
D: Why are we not winning titles, and will new signing fix that?
So, here’s what we can actually blame Levy for: Refusing to break the bank. Everyone has a price, don’t they? We should have just spent it all to win the title, like Liverpool did?
But let’s look at Liverpool: they’ve been spending big to fix huge, critical holes in their squad. Their old GK and CBs just weren’t good enough to win titles. The signings of Alisson and VDV, as expensive as they were, were crucial in order to fix gaping holes that actively lost them titles.
Now look at us. Look at our targets, as named by Poch: Martial and Zaha aren’t much better than Son, if they’re better at all. Sessengon and De Ligt are ones for the future, and currently would be our 4th best winger and CB. I doubt any of our other targets would make a dramatic improvement to our XI.
Why are we not winning titles? IMO, we lost the leagues because we started slowly. We usually hit champions form by December, but by that time we’re already chasing others who started strongly. We’ve lost to a Chelsea side who had players like Moses, Cahill and Pedro, who will never make our first XI, not to mention fucking Leicester. It’s not like we lost to much superior squads because Levy won’t spend to match them.
As for cups competition – none of the teams we lost to are much better than us, but in the big games, it pains me to say it, Poch and the team are always out-tacticed by more experienced ones – Mourinho twice (Chelsea and United), Conte, Allegri.
Personally I think the blame here is with the sporting department. The squad Levy built was good enough to win those ties. All our domestic cup losses came immediately after convincingly beating the same team in the league (5-3, 2-0, 2-0), and we mostly outplayed Juventus too, but in the moment of truth we always came short. I don’t know if it’s tactical or mental, but either way it’s not a professional weakness more signing will fix.
So basically: we’re asking Levy to overspend, risking his entire financial plan, for a bunch of players that wouldn’t really improve our XI, and wouldn’t make us much closer to titles. I can totally see why Levy isn’t excited to do that.
E: It’s not all bad, really
Now, reading the gloom mood here sometimes, you think we’re in a disastrous situation and Levy’s leading us to relegation. Just a quick reminder: we’re about to enter our new huge stadium, lead by the WC winning captain, WC golden boot winner and best striker in the world whose also one of our own, Real Madrid’s first choice manager (who kindly told them to fuck off to stay with us), and a bunch of other world class players. We’re third season straight in the CL, retained all our key players, almost all of them on long contracts. We’re playing exciting football and have the greatest squad we’ve had in my lifetime. Those are all fruits of Levy’s work.
I’m disappointed about signings too, but in the big picture, our situation is amazing and Levy is the first reason for that. He’s not perfect but he’s a pretty damn great chairman. And thanks to his work, our future is brighter than ever.
TL;DR - Levy loves Tottenham and his plan has brought us to where we are. Unlike us, he knows the finances of our clubs. It makes sense to prioritize the long-term plan over hugely expensive signings that wouldn't even significantly upgrade our XI. We didn't win titles because of sporting reasons, not because of Levy. It's a fucking great time to be a Spurs fan.
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