Hot take making fun of a whole ass gender no matter who you’re in front of is a bad move

I do think it's more complicated than that; like, I get it when my lesbian friend goes "god men suck why are they like that" after being catcalled for the 5th time that week and like maybe it's not "morally" right to generalize an entire gender in the "quantifying good vs bad and looking at the net cost/benefit" look at ethics but at the end of the day people will make and shouldn't be ashamed to make choices that aren't aligned with pure rationality. She's allowed to express her rightly felt frustration, and it's undeniable that social factors tend to influence a whole gender to act like dicks to women.

HOWEVER, my point and the point of the post is that you should also be aware of how that expression of frustration will affect those around you. For me and a lot of other transmascs, hearing our friends go "all man are terrible" sucks extra than for cis guys because 1) it means that the person you trust probably doesn't see you as a man despite everything you have done to live as one 2) it means that the person you trust thinks that the thing that you've always wanted is a mistake and something to be made fun of (tangent: this is also why I don't like it when people go "ew do you *want* to be a cis man??" Because while I love being trans, most of my pre-teen and teen years were spent being incredibly depressed that I wasn't born as one).

It's complicated because it's trying to balance the effects of two societal traumas. I don't think my friend is wrong for making fun of men, but I do think it's wrong that she does it in front of a trans guy. As for the appearance thing though, I don't think you should make fun of anyone, regardless. I personally think there's a way to be like "haha that incel lacks hygiene and the neckbeard is evidence" that doesn't also catch bystanders in the crossfire because it doesn't make the nrckbeard the focus of the joke, but I'm also not a great judge of if something comes off insensitive lol. Also I don't think that's really a gender thing, more of a "maybe just be careful because physical appearance is a social signal of stuff like health and economic status etc etc" thing

tldr: deprogram yourself from internet purity culture and have some more understanding for everyone, even if it doesn't have to lead to forgiveness.