#tortoise jelly cookie | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

shimikonde · 4 years

Text

Romeo and Juliet and the Prisoner of Azkaban: Return of the King pt. 3 (4th light novel, pg 96-107)

thank you so much to all the people who very gently cyber bullied me into writing this. i am very busy and very very scatter-brained so if i’m not reminded of things i forget them easily.

sorry again for the wait!! and thank you to @rachiebird for proof reading this!! you were a lot of helpppp

part 1 | part 2

For a moment, the audience gaped at the person who had just shouted at such a loud volume after making his first appearance on stage. Even the people in the wings gaped. Honenuki held a hand to his face in exasperation.

Although according to the staging he was supposed to have made a quiet, eerie first appearance, Tetsutetsu seemed to be letting loose all his frustration at being forced to speak quietly at once.

“Well, well, well! If it isn’t Gondor’s prince, Romeo!!”

“…You’re Count Paris?! Why in heaven’s… Give Juliet back!”

Monoma turned his back to the audience, looking furious as he whispered, “What’s with that performance?! You sound like an over-enthusiastic merchant! Control yourself!!”

Tetsutetsu made a face like, “ah, crap!” at his words, and then did his best to make a scary face.

“…I’ll be seeing you…”

This time, he was too self-conscious, and he ended up speaking in the same quiet voice as he used in the wings. The venue buzzed a bit with mutters of, “Huh? What did he say?” Everybody watching from the wings held their hands to their faces in exasperation. As Honenuki calmly signaled “now” to Juurouta, on standby in the catwalk over the stage, Tetsutetsu grabbed on a rope so that the audience wouldn’t be able to see. Still holding onto Kodai, he flew off.

In response to Tetsutetsu’s line, Monoma exclaimed, “You’ll be seeing me?! What do you mean…? Juliet!!”

Tetsutetsu returned with a dejected, “Sorry, guys…” and everyone responded with encouraging comments like, “Don’t worry about it!” and “Next! Next!” On stage, a scene was playing of Romeo, wanting to chase after Juliet, opposing Sam and Frodo, who said they must search for the king immediately.

“Is this what Master Obi-Wan was warning me about? But to think that Count Paris would kidnap Juliet… There’s no time for this, we must go save Juliet at once!”

“I understand how you feel, my prince! However, it is your duty as the prince to search for the king?!”

“I know that! But, before I’m a prince, I’m a man! There’s no way I could abandon the girl that I love!! Once I get Juliet back, I’ll definitely search for the king… I won’t ask you to understand. …Farewell! From here on, I go alone!”

Monoma exited stage right, Nirengeki and Awase crying out as he ran off.

“My prince!”

Immediately afterward, Nirengeki became aware of a sound coming from the wing on stage left. He thought it was strange, but he was still on stage and focused back on the performance.

“And so it was that Romeo followed after his love, Juliet, alone…”

While listening to Monoma’s narration, Nirengeki and Awase exited into the stage left wing. From here on, they wouldn’t make another appearance until the climax.

“They’re pretty much useless like this…”

The two had just finished letting out relieved sighs when they heard Honenuki’s flustered voice and their faces went wooden. “Did something happen?” Nirengeki asked as he approached them, where he saw Kuroiro with a wad of something in his hand. Silver fragments were scattered here and there in the middle of a shapeless, white mass.

“What’s that?”

In response to Awase’s inquiry, Kaibara explained, “The remains of what were once broken prop swords…”

An upcoming scene would feature Tokage-as-Rey and Rin the soldier. Apparently, the swords they were planning to use had been broken, so they’d attempted to reinforce them using Bondo’s quirk “Cementine,” whereupon he’d unfortunately sneezed and let out a huge amount of cementine along with it. Trying to help, Tetsutetsu had accidentally tripped over some of the cementine on the floor and, while activating his quirk, “Steel,” had crashed into the cementine-covered swords. The avant-garde art they’d produced was a result of everyone trying to kneed them back into something usable. If Bakugou, Kirishima, or Kaminari from Class A had been there, it would have probably reminded them of Meat-senpai’s, in other words Shiketsu High School’s Shishikura Seiji’s, quirk “Meatball.” No matter how you looked at it, there was no saving swords that had become this messed up. To make matters worse, they didn’t have any spares.

“What do we do? Maybe we can do it without swords…” Tokage said hurriedly.

Calmly, Honenuki responded, “No, there’s going to be a sword fight, too. All we can do is substitute them for something that can pass as a sword.”

“Got it, I’ll go look for something,” said Kaibara, and he and Kuroiro rushed outside.

Incidentally, there was a substitute for the swords strapped to Nirengeki’s hip, but in all the chaos not a single person realized it. There was no helping that they’d be a little freaked out at their first performance.

“Juliet… Where are you, Juliet…?!”

Tokage would be appearing in the scene before long. But she wasn’t coming out. Feeling something was wrong, Monoma looked over to the wings to see Honenuki gesturing to him, “Buy us some time!”

Something must have happened… Well, it’s not as if I can’t easily buy time.

Thinking this, Monoma began to adlib.

“Juliet… Just by saying this name, I feel my power overflowing. I haven’t eaten anything in three days, but with one word even my stomach can be filled… Love is a food—is life itself, it would seem. I don’t need anything else in life. Not even Gondor’s world-famous taro with yolk jelly, or a banana-wrapped river banana, or divine beef with goblin sauce, or boiled kamaitachi, or naked giant tortoise with naked turtle oyakodon, or captive jaguar katsudon, or mirin-dried long-eared giraffe, or deep-fried shaggy lion tail, or proud-kneed baby elephant shadow cookies, or black-stomached bat ink pasta, or short-reigned sluggish giant hare soup. As I am now, as long as I have love…”

Is it just about time?

However, Honenuki gave him an apologetic look as he gestured, “a little bit more.” Without so much as a hint to the fact that he was stalling for time, Monoma continued his adlibbing.

“That’s right, Juliet’s hometown, the country of Rohan, was famous for their seafood, wasn’t it? Certainly, they’re able to get all kinds of seafood thanks to their vast subterranean lakes, or such… Lockbox crab innards, for instance… I’ve heard that one taste and you’re unable to stop laughing. Fufu, just thinking about it is making me laugh. I suppose Juliet must have eaten it before, too? I would love to eat it and laugh together with her one day… Oh, yes, and you can’t talk about the country of Rohan without mentioning realtuna. If you make a sandwich with white rice between two fillets of the tuna, then spend three days quietly eating it where no one can see you, apparently your lifespan increases by three years. If that’s true, I would like if I could give some to my father…”

…Hm? Finally… Really, what happened back there?

Monoma, noticing Honenuki’s “we’re good now” gesture, went over the setup in his head.

After this, Tokage and Rin will make their appearance as survivors of the Galactic Liberation Allied Forces…

Monoma looked up, shocked, and he shouted, “Wha-what’s that?!”

With a metallic sliding noise, a UFO crash landed. As Monoma timidly approached it, the set doors to the UFO blew open, and Tokage and Rin came flying out.

“Are you okay, Rey?!” asked Rin, dressed as a soldier.

Tokage-as-Rey answered, “Yeah…” Then, noticing Monoma, she startled. “You… A minion of the Imperial Army! For how long do you intend to get in our way…!”

“You dog of the Empire!”

“Wait a second, what is this all about…?”

As he gave his panicked response, Monoma prepared himself for his next moves. They would engage in a battle with their swords. It was an important fight that was meant to show the growth of the prince, who had before fought and lost over the dried meat. They’d practiced the fierce exchange of swords over and over again countless times, and thanks to that they’d managed to make it look really good.

“Silence! Glory to Democracy!”

First, Tokage comes at me, and then Rin immediately after, and then after I narrowly avoid that… Huh?

Setsuna and Rin made ghastly, frightening figures as they approached, and Monoma’s eyes turned to dots as they drew what they had strapped to their backs.

Forgetting for a second that he was still on stage, Monoma shot out, “Why bats?!”

Tokage and Rin held them as if they were swords, but there was no changing the fact that they were a pair of metal bats. The audience in the front began to take notice, too, and the sound of them muttering, “Hey, is that a bat?” snapped Monoma back into himself.

From the wings, Honenuki made an apologetic face as he gestured, “Continue!” The thing that Kuroiro and the rest brought back after their search was pair of bats, which had been borrowed from a different class that was putting on a batting center.

“The sword broke and this is all we had!”

“We just have to fool them.”

In response to Tokage and Rin’s frantic whispers, Monoma accepted his fate with a, “I guess there’s no choice…!” and drew his own sword. As they crossed sword and bat, the metal clanged together, and Monoma occasionally made a show of falling to the ground.

“That sword is massive, unlike any I’ve ever seen…! So these are the swords they use in space!”

By the brute force of Monoma’s acting ability, what would have looked like a delinquent couple attacking with bats was transformed into a scene in which members of the Galactic Liberation Allied Forces fought with space-swords that happened to look like bats. In response to the crisis on the stage, Fukidashi on sound increased the volume, and Kamakiri on lighting changed to a narrower light to help draw the audience’s eyes.

“It looks like we’ve managed to fool them…”

At Honenuki’s words, all of the people watching nervously from the wings seemed to grow listless with relief.

“Leave it to Monoma…”

“Monoma… I offer a banquet of blessings for your sheer guts…”

While he was still onstage, Kaibara and Kuroiro sent Monoma words of gratitude that they would surely never say to his face. It seemed that the fight was going to reach its climax as the battle bean to exude desperation.

“Kuroiro, do you happen to know where the ring I put here might be?”

“Huh? I left that ring over there.”

As he answered Shiozaki’s question, Kuroiro hurried over to the table where the props were set out. Apparently unable to find it, Kuroiro muttered, “It should be right here…” as he searched the area.

“What happened?” Honenuki and some others asked as they approached.

“I put the ring we’re going to be using next down on this prop table, but…”

By that, he meant the ring that they would be using after this, when Shiozaki made her appearance as the spirit of the ring. They’d upgraded it a bit, making it so that it was a bit bigger and stood out better compared to the one that Monoma had.

Shiozaki and company’s turn was coming up. Everyone searched the area, but there was no hint of it.

Incidentally, the ring in question had fallen in the commotion over the swords before, and had managed to roll its way into the space below the stage, in the underground closet usually used to store the chairs. Unfortunately, they would only discover the ring there later, when they were cleaning up the stage after the performance ended.

“Ah… Why must god give us such trials…” Shiozaki clasped her hands together, looking to be at her wit’s end. Pony and Juurouta also made worried expressions.

“Again?! What do we do?”

In the chaos, Kaibara looked to Honenuki. Honenuki thought for a moment, and then opened his mouth.

“If we can’t find it, we’ll have to find a replacement again. That, or make one…”

However, it seemed there wouldn’t be time to go out and search this time.

“Does anyone here have something round with a hole in the middle that looks like a ring?!”

Kaibara circled the area as he looked around. As the others also searched around, too, Tetsutetsu suddenly held out something in his hand.

“Can we use this as a replacement…?!”

What he held was a long, tube-like thing with a soft, uneven exterior. It appeared to be a fish cake made by turning fish into paste, wrapping it around a cane, and then cooking it. Chikuwa. Tetsutetsu had brought it along as a snack for when he started to feel hungry.

“…we can work with this.” Saying this, Kuroiro used the box cutter he’d been holding to cut off a slice. He showed it to everyone. “See?”

“It looks like a ring!” they agreed.

“I’ve got some gold eye shadow.” Komori offered him some eye shadow, which Kuroiro took from her.

“Th… Thanks,” he said, then quickly painted it on, turning it into what looked to be a peculiar ring.

“Alright, this should be good!”

Kaibara beamed and gave Shiozaki a thumbs-up. As Kuroiro handed her the ring, Shiozaki made an anguished face as if she’d been crucified. “…with this I’m going to be the spirit of the chikuwa…”

As she began to pale, trying to figure out how on earth fish paste might feel, Pony and Juurouda tried to help.

“Since you’re getting made into paste it’s gonna be really ouchy?”

“No, from the moment it became chikuwa, surely it would have already been called up to heaven.”

To the flabbergasted Shiozaki, Honenuki calmly said, “It’s not chikuwa. Because this is a ring. This is a ring that looks like chikuwa.”

On the stage, the sword fight had ended, and Monoma-as-Romeo had completely resolved the misunderstanding with Rey and the soldier of the Galactic Liberation Allied Forces, played by Tokage and Rin.

“If it’s you two, you’ll definitely be able to liberate the galaxy! I’m sure that my own country of Gondor will eventually advance into space, too. Rey, when that day comes, I’d like if you could help us out with things.”

“Sure, Romeo. Let’s build a peaceful galaxy together!”

“Rey, we must be on our way.”

“…don’t die. Live so that we may meet again someday.”

“I promise. When that time comes, I’ll be sure to treat you to Gondor’s specialty, northern tanuki treasure pouch hotpot!”

Rin called her from within the UFO, and Tokage stopped and turned back to him right as she was about to return to it.

“Hahaha, I look forward to it. Also to meeting your Juliet, too… Speaking of which, when we were falling, we happened to see something mysterious.”

“What?”

“A ways north of here, there was an eerie castle. It looked as if an eerie man and a girl were having a dispute over something…”

“Could it be? Perhaps that suspicious man and the girl were Count Paris and Juliet…”

“Rey! Quickly!”

“Well then, Romeo. May the force be with you.”

Having said that, the UFO raised up to the ceiling, where it disappeared. Monoma slowly walked to the middle of the stage as he began to talk.

“North… Juliet might be over there. But who on earth is this Count Paris, anyway? He said that Juliet was his possession… Could it be that Juliet had been trying to escape from that man? If so, it’s possible that he’s Juliet’s fiancé… No, Juliet promised to marry me! Her heart is with me. However, it would not be strange for a country to marry their princess off to another country in order to strengthen the bonds with them. Which would mean that that man would be the king of some country, and Juliet’s fiancé? …Ahh, if that’s truly the case, then what am I to do…!”

Anguishing over his love, Monoma-as-Romeo’s suffering soon became more than his body could take. As he fell to the ground, a ray of light shined straight down from the ceiling.

“Romeo… Romeo…”

Monoma looked around in shock at the sound of Shiozaki’s echoing voice.

“Who’s there?!”

“Romeo… I am inside your pocket…”

Part 4

#bnha #bnha light novel #class 1b #juzo honenuki #monoma neito #tetsutetsu tetsutetsu #shihai kuroiro #sen kaibara #setsuna tokage #i think they were all the ones that appeared most frequently this time #god this entire section was pure chaos #monoma and honenuki were the real mvps tho i'm so proud of both of them #such a pain to translate tho LMAO #some things as you might notice are extremely literal because i just did not know what to do with them #anyway i'll try to get the rest out in a more timely manner but don't be shy about bullying me it rly does help #translations

36 notes · View notes

droo216 · 5 years

Text

Ravenclaw: old records and Indie music, telescopes, Wreck This Journal, buying three new books but just rereading your favorites, worn-out Chuck Taylors covered in Sharpie doodles, chasing rain paths down windows, bare hanging lightbulbs, Rubik's cubes, typewriters and ballpoint pens, watercolor stains, dreamcatchers, philosophical discussions at 2:00 am, peacoats and woolen scarves, hunching over a glowing laptop and typing furiously, world maps and globes, interpretive dance, magnifying glasses, chess, unorganized bookshops and hushed libraries, the Dewey Decimal system, astrology, the neverending stream of paint when you're trying to wash the brush, tortoise shell glasses, crunching autumn leaves under your shoes, dictionaries, classical architecture, Leonardo da Vinci

Gryffindor: combat boots, flannel sheets and plaid shirts, burnt matches, the bite in your chest after running really hard, hot showers, fireworks in the backyard, manbuns, leather jackets, cross necklaces, smokey eyeshadow, Arya Stark, skinny dipping, the Grand Canyon, passionate sports fans painted in their teams' colors, heavy quilts, bandaged hands, Cards Against Humanity, firebreathing, red solo cups, “We Didn’t Start the Fire” by Billy Joel, pepperoni pizza, double exposed photography, lip rings and septum piercings, fire escapes, superhero T-shirts, Poe Dameron, the smell of incense, double-sided sequin patterns, haunted houses, vintage Coca-Cola bottle

Hufflepuff: flower crowns, gooey chocolate chip cookies, the smell of laundry just coming out of the dryer, heavy sweaters in pastel colors, potted plants, mismatched picture frames, soup and sandwich combos, flour all over your hands and face, wooden bunk beds, Leslie Knope, The Brady Bunch reruns, the smell of freshly mown grass, dirt under your fingernails, fields of wheat, Swedish massages, the funnies, embroidery, dusty chalkboards, bees and honeycomb, fairy lights, suspenders, toes peeking out from under the covers, dried flowers pressed between the pages of a book, overstuffed chairs, Princess Tiana, coffee shops, dried herbs tied up and hanging in rows, hide and seek, saddle shoes, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, thrift stores, henna tattoos, Chapstick, knitting projects, smiley face umbrellas, LUSH bath bombs, shelves of assorted mugs, picket fences, Peter Pan collars, picking out fresh fruit at the grocery

Slytherin: French manicures, red lipstick, stilettos, antique gilded mirrors, crystal chandeliers, expensive perfume, Mac computers, foggy mornings, cuff links, American Horror Story, black cats, white cats, neon signs, satin sheets, Grey Goose vodka, tuxedos and black evening gowns, the first frost of the year, Tony Stark, lacy black lingerie, lipstick stains on white dress shirt collars, Lamborghinis and limousines, designer sunglasses, Paris, New York City, wing-tipped eyeliner, coffee black, velvet furniture, Venus fly traps, The Devil Wears Prada, succulents, crossing your fingers behind your back, "Royals" by Lorde, albino peacocks, fur coats, black chokers, Chandler Bing, hair dyed silver, marble sculptures, vintage cards, family heirlooms, gothic architecture

#hp #hp aesthetic #hogwarts #hogwarts houses #harry potter #idk i’ve had this in my notes on my phone for literally years #so i thought i would post it

164 notes · View notes

fimawari · 4 years

Text

Aight Imma do this shit all at once so I don't spam post

1. Coffee

2. Probably have to be Sakuramochi, persevering through all the hate to try and heal people's woes. She keeps going regardless.

3. Spaghetti, Peking Duck, and Chocolate are near the top for me

4. Coffee again, I loved Ice coffee, but for an actual dish, Steak. I'm a basic bitch.

5. Tiramisu, love the food soul but the actual stuff is way to sweet and rich for me

6. Tortoise Jelly, would whip my ass into shape

7. Guess what it's coffee again!

8. Some weird abomination of Cheese, Tiramisu, Hotdog, and Cookie

9. Braised Noodles and Matsutake Dobinmushi, felt like they just barely glided over her with one summon event

10. Huangshan Maofeng Tea, bastard has always out manuevered me. Orange Juice and Nasi Lemak also somehow managed to avoid me for almost a year.

11. Idek think it was Spicy Gluten

12. Cold Rice Shrimp my baby

13. Idk I kept milk for a long time, might've been spicy.

14. Toso Queen

15. B-52, summoned him first week and I was so happy.

16. Canele

17. Milk

18. Eggette

19. All of them, even you too Whisky, you bitch

20. Mooncake

21. Raindrop baby

22. Tequila

23. Black Pudding

24. Steak

25. Spaghetti

26. Durga

27. Spectra, I think he's Milk's past attendent.

28. Queen Conch

29. Mithra

30. Calamari, Sponge Candy, French Fries, Hot Chocolate, Lemonade, Fettuccini Alfredo, Lasagna, Gumball, Chicken Wings (cool if they looked like Turkey a bit), Taco, Burrito, Butterscotch, White Wine, Funnel Cake, Deep Fried Butter (Just to make everyone cringe horribly), Strawberry Cheesecake, Strawberry Shortcake, Strawberry Lemonade, Creme du leche, french onion soup, alphabet soup (for the lols), Gold Cake, Baked Potato, Mac and Cheese, Grilled Cheese, Pb and I, Peanut Butter by itself, Sub Sandwich, Honey literal Honey and the better have a pet badger and a giant chubby bee, Pineapple Pizza cus I wanna make people mad, Green Apple, Bacon, Grape Juice and I want them to be a kid drinking grape juice out of a wine glass, Horse Radish, Caesar Salad and they better be impaled with a knife, Sponge Cake, SPAM, Haggis, Tripe, Hakarl, Stinkheads, Shiokara (to really get some people throwing up here), Fugu, Balut and I want them to be a sociopath, Dragon in the flame of desire (sounds cool but look it up), Shirako, Casu Marzu and they should be a mummy, Civet Coffee, Iced Coffee, Cream, Rhubarb Pie, Miracle Berry, Poutine, Salo, Lamprey, Ackee.

1 note · View note

differenttriumphdragon · 5 years

Text

WHAT'S UP, EVERYBODY!?

Season 4 has arrived, and with it a multitude of changes to the game's framework.

We can't actually talk about all of 'em cause of the image limit, so check out the in-game announcements for yourself.

First, of course, we need to announce the Showdown results!

You know, the one we couldn't talk about 'cause Tumblr sucks? Anyways, I'm pretty confident that my team'll-

WHAT!? ARE YOU SERIOUS!? We even won the Twitter poll!!!

It pays to not slack off, Devil. You can't waste an early lead. Haven't you ever heard of The Tortoise and the Hare?

Since when do tortoises grow hair!? Aren't they reptiles or something? And what does that have to do with slacking off, anyway?

...

Still, almost 2 and a half billion obstacles, each...I'd kill for the kind of power you'd need for that.

It's definitely impressive to think about. You likely won't run into more than a few hundred obstacles in a run, and yet, you've all managed to break nearly five billion...

It really shows how dedicated both sides are to the game. We really couldn't ask for a better playerbase.

Yeah, so let's make this Season the best one yet!!!

Speaking of, it's time to introduce the new Breakout Episode!

Introducing the far off land of Yogurca: a thriving desert town loomed over by icy mountains and a Yeti rumored to be bent on freezing the continent.

So you're saying...it's a Desert Paradise?

Not if it freezes over, of course. It's said that Yogurca has mountains of hidden treasure waiting on its shores, as well as the secrets of the origin of Alchemy.

...Wait, Alchemist is getting a Magic Candy before ME!? But she's the WORST CHARACTER!!!

I didn't say that.

Hey, Vamp! If you're watching? GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN!!!

Also, so you're aware, Treasures can now only be used once in Breakout, just like Cookies and Pets.

Wait, what!? Even aside from the obvious, the Treasure Gatcha really hates giving you new Treasures! How are we even supposed to get enough!?

Actually, the new event might help!

The Special Treasure Draw has been slightly reworked; Now, you can select five different Epic Treasures to increase the chances of, instead of just one!

Five different Treasures? Kay. So, what if I don't know what I want?

You could always just set ones you haven't maxed. Or, you know, just keep drawing repeats forever.

You also have quadruple the chance of drawing an Epic Treasure. It's much easier to get them all!

So, hey, who's the guy in the corner?

That's Yogurt Cream Cookie! The son of a merchant, he collects vast hordes of treasures with the help of his three spirit companions. His power is similar to Alchemist's; whenever he slides up until his meter is full, the spirit he'll summon changes.

They're genies, right? Can we just call them genies?

His companion is Magic Lamp. No one knows for sure exactly why this Lamp is following him, or what it could be thinking.

I'll bet you a pound of Royal Dough it wants to curse him to be the fourth genie.

Yogurt Cream also has a Costume!

Huh. Is this what Yogurcan fashion is like? It looks like his coat is covered in ninja stars.

I'd assume this outfit is for the icy side of the country. Or at least, for those cold desert nights.

There's also a new Treasure!

...WAIT, I'VE GOT IT!!! If Peach is Sun Wukong, and Plum is Momotaro...Yogurt Cream must be Ali Baba!

Devil, not everyone is a mythological character. We've been over this.

So you want me to be more low-key about it?

*sigh*

By the way, there's one more big update!

Daily Quests have been changed!

By which you mean Cinnamon hijacked them, right?

Er...you're not wrong, per se...each day, he'll give you cards with tasks on them. Completing these tasks gives you valuable prizes, including lots of Rainbow Cubes!

Sweet! I might not have to use all my money on 'em anymore!

Anyway, that's all for-

Hold up!!! You're not even gonna show the new Jelly Set?

Which new Jelly Set, Devil?

My Again Set!!! Put the picture up!

Look at 'em! Look at how cute they are! They're perfect!!! The red one tastes like sweet potato fries, the black one tastes like cola, and the big one's the best ketchup you ever had!!! I top it off with the Red Dragon Bead Basic Jelly for that feeling of power I deserve!

...You don't have your own Basic Jelly yet, do you?

Look, it's weird giving myself virtual gifts, okay!?

Hehe...Well, until next time, everyone...

Heaven or Hell, let's rock!

...So, aside from a Magic Candy, what do you want from this Season, Devil?

Someone at Devsis to give a damn about me.

#cookie run #heaven n' hell #yogurt cream cookie #angel cookie #devil cookie #hero cookie #splatfest

21 notes · View notes

sayumia · 5 years

Text

Food Fantasy Headcanons 2: Electric Boogaloo

Dumb facts and stuff ahead based off food facts, animal facts, and my 3 am brain.

If Toast gets wet and isn't dried almost immediately he will develop spots similar to mold. They won't go away unless he spends a long time in the ice arena. The same can happen to Sandwich or any other bread food soul.

Sweet and Salty's heights are exactly the same as the amount of calories in a block of tofu.

Due to tofu's ability to be a substitute for a myriad of food options, both Sweet and Salty have an almost disturbing ability to mimic other food soul's voices and handwriting. They usually use this to pull pranks.

Yogurt, Milk, Cheese, Milk Tea and basically any other dairy based souls are incredibly sensitive to heat, it is NOT a good idea to send them outside when it's hot.

Raindrop Cake has an uncanny ability to cause rainstorms when his mood gets particularly bad. During his rare bouts of happiness flowers tend to bloom especially well in his presence.

Alcohol food souls are naturally buzzed, the level of drunkenness will naturally go up depending on mood. They will get drunker the more irritated they get.

No one knows whether Vodka came first or Andre. Popular opinion is the first thing Vodka did when coming into existence was make a bird and then immediately start drinking.

Eggette has a suprising amount of magical ability but since he can't control it, most of the time it leads to accidents and neverending hens.

Sweet Tofu is banned from all Jello events, don't ask why, just know he's banned and Pudding will most like demand he's removed from the area immediately.

Omurice is banned from all Mango Pudding events.

You can cook food on Boston Lobster, Steak, Hotpot, basically any food soul that exudes high heat. Boston Lobster will however probably bisect you if you use him as a stove.

While Boston Lobster doesn't like Peking Duck he does stupid stuff to get his attention just to cause a fight. Peking humors him just because he doesn't like to be rude.

Spicy Gluten is actually cute if you catch her off guard enough to break her dominatrix personality.

Spicy Gluten is actually great with kids despite well everything about she talks.

Cloud Tea almost always has no idea what she's talking about but everyone besides Tortoise Jelly seems to believe all of it.

Jello secretly drinks because being an idol is stressful as hell despite her cheery outlook

Red Wine and Steak do get annoyed that everyone seems to think they're dating but sometimes the misunderstandings get them free food, so it's fine.

Gingerbread's shield is actually made of cookies, and is edible but no one has the strength to bite through it.

Gingerbread's shield only retains it's strength if she's using however, if anyone else used it in battle it would be as effective as using an actual cookie shield.

One winter it got so cold that Escargot once fell asleep for three years straight and nothing anyone did could wake him up. He was still fully able to defend himself however.

Staring into Chocolate's eyes for too long actually causes the human/elf/cat/fish/etc. brain to release dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphin, which causes the falling in love sensation. Imperial scientists have no idea what caused this but they really won't risk trying to fix it.

Spaghetti and Boston Lobster often argue about who has the most enticing scent.

Milk Tea still doesn't understand Hot Dog, and no amount of explaining seems to help.

Since Pretzel won't leave Bloody Mary alone, he tends to do whatever offputting thing he can do to make him pause long enough for a getaway.

Considering people can turn into fallen if they enter a state of despair large enough, no one has ever seen a cattendant, teapot, or fish turn into a fallen in this way.

The Sweet Tofu panty raid? Yes those still happen.

The Sweet Talk podcast is good for giving you bad advice.

"How do you know if a girl likes you?"

"If you have to ask she doesn't like you."

Stuff like that.

I could probably add more to this but I'll save that for Food Fantasy Headcanons 3: 33 and a 3rd.

78 notes · View notes

ninawritesastory · 6 years

Note

Your creek farmer au? Love it, im gay for it, its the best and i am w e a k

Oh, thank you! Here, have a little farmboy Tweek snippet!

“He’s baaaaack,” Nina teased, singsonging the words into his ear.

The he in question was one of Tweek’s classmates. Craig, he thought his name was. The boy always wore blue and kept that blue and yellow hat on at all times, even in gym class. He was silent, for the most part, and if he said anything it was said in a dry, sarcastic sort of tone. And he always had this sort of intense look in his eyes, like he was thinking about snapping Tweek’s neck or something equally as sinister.

He had also been stalking their booth at the farmers’ market every Saturday for going on two months now. He never said anything, he never came within more than five feet of Tweek, and he only bought a few small things—usually rock candy or one of the small sample-sized jars of jelly or jam. Today, he seemed pretty invested in the basket of mewling kittens. Nina’s tortoise shell cat had recently had a litter, and they were finally old enough to find new homes for. Snickers, the proud mama, stood guard by the basket, making sure none of the kittens were successful in their attempts to go out and explore the crowded marketplace.

“You should go talk to him,” she whispered, bagging up a few jars of jam for an elderly lady.

“No way,” Tweek hissed back. “He always looks like he wants to kill me!”

“Maybe he just wants to get to know you, and he’s too shy to do it himself,” she replied, offering a bright smile and a cheerful thank-you to her customer as she handed her the bag and the change. “Snickers seems to like him well enough.”

The cat seemed to really like Craig, purring loudly and weaving in and out of his hands as he pet her. The kittens seemed to like him, too; one of the more rambunctious ones had decided Craig would make an excellent jungle gym, crawling up his jacket sleeve and exploring a bit more of the world.

“Snickers likes everyone.”

“Just go talk to him,” Nina insisted. “David and Henry will be here in ten minutes. Vivienne and I can manage without you for that long.”

Tweek groaned. Nina wasn’t gonna let him worm his way out of this one; she was annoyingly persistent in getting him to go out and make friends. Not everyone was as naturally charismatic as her; Tweek had had enough trouble back in Wisconsin, when his tics and spasms were still frequent and strong. He’d gotten more control over them, but sometimes a muscle spasm still caught him off guard and sometimes he couldn’t swallow the overwhelmed shrieks. And they tended to make a comeback when he was nervous.

“Fine,” he relented, making it clear he wasn’t in love with the idea. “I’ll talk to him for ten minutes. But once David and Henry get here, I’m getting back to work. Okay?”

“That works for me,” she replied, that infuriating knowing smile on her face. “Just make an effort, okay, little brother?”

With a hard swallow, Tweek made his way out from behind the table.

“Do you like cats?”

He bit back a wince; that was a stupid way to start a conversation. Obviously Craig didn’t mind cats; he didn’t seem to have a problem with the kittens climbing all over him. Craig looked like he’d been caught with his hand in the cookie jar, eyes wide and mouth slack as though he never thought in a million years that Tweek would talk to him. After a moment, though, he seemed to recover, features schooled back into that familiar neutral expression.

“They’re okay,” he replied. “I like guinea pigs better, though.”

“Guinea pigs are cool,” Tweek offered, and it still sounded so lame to him. “I, uh, I’ve never had one.”

“I’ve got one. Her name’s Stripe.”

“Aren’t they social animals, though? Isn’t it bad for them to be alone?”

Craig shrugged. “I had a second one, but she died a few weeks ago. I’m saving up for a new one, though. They’re kind of expensive.”

Tweek nodded. “Yeah. Um, mind if I sit with you?”

“Isn’t this your booth?”

“Uh, my family’s, yeah, but it’s still good to ask.”

Again, Craig just shrugged. “It’s fine. I don’t mind.”

Tweek dropped onto the ground, folding his legs and scooping up a couple of the kittens who had decided to climb up Craig’s back and onto his hat. His favorite was the one long-haired kitten in the bunch. She looked pudgier than the others, but that was all fur and she had a very sweet face. She must’ve gotten her coloring from her father, though, because she was mostly white with a large dappled brown patch from her ears all the way down to her tail.

“Do they have names,” Craig asked, pulling Tweek back into the real world.

“Uh, not really. Mama says not to name the kittens because then we’ll get attached. Nina’s already smuggled three in, and between her and our grandma, we’ve got four running around the house.”

“Your sister?”

Tweek nodded. “Yeah. Do you have any siblings?”

“A little sister. Her name’s Tricia. She’s annoying as hell.”

He snickered a little at that, and Craig smiled a bit. It was a nice look on him. It made his eyes a little brighter, and made him look less like he was plotting murder. Maybe…maybe Craig wasn’t as scary as he thought. Maybe Nina was right.

#nina answers asks #anon #sp creek #tweek as a farm kid #thank you so much for your kind words #i love this au too #maybe i'll write more for it later

28 notes · View notes

teethlabyrinth · 2 years

Photo

Who said you have to pick between magical and physical ability? Tortoise Jelly Cookie is a young magician who has been cultivating the ultimate combination of destructive magic with physical combat, to protect her hometown of Lotus Pond Village from the ceaseless incursions of beasts that have threatened it as long as she’s been alive. Her personality can generously be described as “intense,” and can more accurately be described as “extremely intense!” If this cookie just cultivated her strength for one hundred straight years, she would definitely ascend as some sort of war god — and then come straight back down, because all the important fights are here.

this cookie was made for punching, and that’s just what she’ll- ah fuck i’m being attacked

Rating: Epic, Class: Charge, thought i haven’t figured out her ability in depth... it definitely involves her jiǔjiébiān though.

Relationships:

Plum Cookie: My regular sparring partner! When he next comes by, I’ll challenge him again! (friendly) ↔ We are sparring partners. She takes her training very seriously! (friendly)

Peach Cookie: She does not take her training seriously enough! How can she hope to win a serious fight like that?! (rival) ↔ She’s Plum Cookie’s sparring partner, right? She seems nice! (friendly)

Ginseng Cookie: Ginseng-yisheng comes by my village occasionally to heal our wounded. He’s old and weak, but very talented! (admiration)

Bellflower Cookie: She’s visited Lotus Pond Village a few times! She’s no good in a fight, but skilled at medicine. (friendly) ↔ We meet whenever I visit her village. It’s so lovely! She’s such an enthusiastic person. (friendly)

Almond Cookie: He’s taken me in chains several times! Unjust! And cowardly!! Fight me like a man, officer!! (rival) ↔ I’ve had to arrest her for destructive public magic use a few times. I don’t think she means any harm, but… Well, she’s a fighter. (rival)

Espresso Cookie: My former professor has never taken good enough care of his body! How is he meant to be a great mage like that, huh?! Sleep more, laoshi! (rival)

Latte Cookie: She was my teacher once upon a time! I’ve moved on, but I still really respect her! (admiration)

Quotes:

I’m pursuing the perfect mix of magic and martial.

I’m creating my own style! Martial? Magic? Both!

Don’t ask me what I’m cultivating! Ask me how you can cultivate better!

There’s no fight I won’t learn from!

Are we sparring? We’re sparring?! Prepare yourself!!!

Form one! Form two! Form three! Hyah!

The spell exploded again, but I’m getting closer! I can feel it!

If I can just figure this out, we’ll never lose again!

It feels like I’m only partway through heaven’s tribulations… How many more are there?

Do you know what happens when you achieve perfection?! Ascension, of course!

#cookie run #cookie run kingdom #cookie run oc #fancookie #tortoise jelly cookie #my art

6 notes · View notes

riendorizos-blog · 7 years

Text

Lesbian ask 2

Lesbian ask game part 2 People liked my other one so much I thought I should make another 1. Wake her up with kisses lesbian or play with her hair while you wait for her to wake up lesbian - play with her hair 2. X files lesbian or twin peaks lesbian - x files. Are you fucking kidding me? 3. Pit Bull lesbian or corgi lesbian? Pit bull. Always. 4. Sweet tooth lesbian or saturates-everything-in-hot sauce lesbian- uhm. Both? 5. Sunflower lesbian or white lily lesbian- both. All the flowers and plants. 6. Rose gold lesbian or white gold lesbian. White gold. 7. Dunkin’ donuts/Starbucks lesbian or strictly local cafe lesbian. Only Starbucks and local. No DD shit. 8. Sunrise lesbian or sunset lesbian- always the sunsets. 9. Emily Dickinson lesbian or maya Angelou lesbian. Emily 10. Dark sexy ball gown or cute bright ball gown lesbian. Dark dark dark. 11. Strawberry lesbian or watermelon lesbian/ strawberry. 12. High waisted shorts lesbian or loose rolled up jeans lesbian- jeans. 13. 60s chic lesbian or 60s hippie lesbian- forever a hippy. 14. Band lesbian or orchestra lesbian. None! 15. Choir lesbian or garage band lesbian. None! 16. Twirl her around lesbian or get twirled lesbian/ I don't twirl. 17. Sit com lesbian or artsy independent dramatic romance film from France lesbian- artsy fartsy 18. Bicycle lesbian or bus lesbian/ peddles 19. Jelly fish lesbian or dolphin lesbian- jelly 20. Biology lesbian or physics lesbian- biology 21. Studio Ghibli lesbian or Cartoon Network lesbian/ um what? 22. Take the spider outside lesbian or scream at her to take the spider outside lesbian- the spiders live here. 23. Serena Williams lesbian or Ronda Rousey lesbian -the goddess Serena. 24. Prismacolor lesbian or faber castell lesbian - Prisma 25. “Campers are for the weak” lesbian or “I will die before sleeping on the ground” lesbian- depends on the mood and where we are 26. Calling every female character they see their girlfriend lesbian or “Dana Scully isn’t your girlfriend, I am” lesbian/ fuck everyone. Dana scully is mine. 27. Roller skate lesbian or ice skate lesbian - roller 28. “Christmas carols are dumb and over played” lesbian or belting out all I want for Christmas is you at the top of their lungs lesbian - I'm Jewish 29. Buy her something lesbian or make her something lesbian - both!!! 30. Cherry mojitos lesbian or cherry flavored vodka lesbian - uhhhh 31. Write her poems lesbian or bake her cookies lesbian- bake bake bake 32. Tummy kisses lesbian or thigh kisses lesbian - none. Don't touch me 33. I’ll fight anyone that makes my girl cry lesbian or I’ll psychologically destroy anyone that makes my girl cry lesbian - mind games 34. Fall asleep in her arms lesbian or rub her back until she falls asleep in your arms lesbian- rub her back 35. Floral pattern lesbian or tie dye lesbian- does tie dye come in black? 36. Snake lesbian or frog lesbian- tortoise 37. Send her memes lesbian or “if you call me the rarest Pepe one more time I swear to god”- fuck this idiotic shit 38. Star Wars lesbian or lord of the rings lesbian- lord of the rings 39. Spice girls lesbian or 5th harmony lesbian- spicy 40. Pink hair lesbian or blue hair lesbian - will keep my black and white 41. Maple syrup lesbian or berry syrup lesbian - maple!! 42. Vinyl lesbian or cassette lesbian- vinyl 43. Paris lesbian or Amsterdam lesbian- both. Duh 44. Jazz lesbian or swing lesbian - again. Both. 45. Pin stripes lesbian or plaid lesbian- pin fucking stripes 46. Mini golf date lesbian or bowling date lesbian/ eewww 47. D E S T R O Y her at Mario kart lesbian or let her win lesbian - none of this 48. Pullover hoodie lesbian or zip up hoodie lesbian- pull over 49. Band tshirt lesbian or fandom tshirt lesbian- BOTH. ALWAYS SHARE THE LOVE 50. Love her with your entire heart lesbian or lover her with your entire soul lesbian- soul lasts forever

#lesbian asks

5 notes · View notes