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monsoonblooms12 · 3 years

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Priyotomo (Ethan Ramsey x f!MC)

Summary: The Last Day at Amazon and Ethan's first day back at Boston from Ethan and Pooja's POV

Priyotom(o/a): (Bengali) Dearest, Most Beloved

A/N: Time for another hopeless attempt at poetry!! Anyway, this is my take on Dr Ethan Ramsey running to the Amazons. I really hope that this is not absolute crap and makes so sense🧡

Thank you so much to Simone for Pre-reading! Love you Gurl🧡

If you enjoyed the story, please like it, leave a comment or reblog. Your feedback keeps me going🤎

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey X f!MC (Pooja Sharma)

Word Count: around 1.8K

Rating: General

Category: Angst

Warnings: (Very Brief) Mentions of blood, fainting and drinking

Title Inspo: Priyotomo Hai - Rabindra Sangeet (Rabindranath Tagore's composition)

OTHER WORKS

Pooja

16 years.

The date was displayed with vivid eloquence by the woody beige cubes that adorned the desk, posing a match with the minimalism of the room.

It was a preposterous fact.

Glassy ambers switched perspective in a progressive motion, and they interpreted the solitary shine of the table lamp on the transparent surface.

Four glowing smiles, two tiny toddlers sat on their parents' lap.

It does not feel surreal. Neither a tale of a bygone era.

It was not her past. It was her present, her life's gears were turned by this very photograph.

Her bracelet adorned hand held it close to her heart, which beat in a meteoric rhythm.

The cacophonous tunes from the fiesta painfully pierced through her reverie, cajoling her to close the mahogany doors that lead to her cocoon.

The flamboyant kantha stitched lehenga proved to be burdensome to carry.

With ponderous steps, Pooja settled down on the couch, pulling her feet to herself.

She wanted to be ten again. Not eleven.

Terminate the time when she could be that blithe girl, rolling dices with her mother.

But there was a specific reason why the reminisces came back stronger than any usual day.

Somewhere in the remote land, in a cholera-stricken district, a summery blue-eyed man spent his days in seclusion.

And occupied the chambers of her cerebral hemispheres.

What was the pain of being left alone with only emotions as a companion without as much as a message?

She wiped her cheek, only to discover the black of her eyeliner now adorning her fingers.

She had been crying.

When? She could not feel the tears that left smokey meanders on the map of her face.

The heartbreak and the circumstances had numbed her feelings. All she wanted was an embrace.

Why did his peach lips mark her as his if this was the end in sight?

She refused to accept it. The end.

She placed her foot down, not feeling the pierce of a pin fallen down against her skin.

Drops of scarlet marked her track as she retouched the smear of her face.

Time to go and socialize.

Ethan

Of everything to look at in the shiny cellular, his eyes now traced the pristine form of the lady who now inhabited every one of his senses.

The comely picture made her look ravishing and the adamant neurons started pulling out manila folders with her memories kept in them.

No. He cannot.

The fiery golden liquid disappeared faster than it had been poured.

He had found himself on the crossroad of whether to type out the words that played in a loop in his mind or not.

I miss you!

He always chose the latter.

He had already given her a false hope.

Of a future of them.

He did not want to do it again.

Only now he realizes that it was a hope he had given himself as well when he first took that sacred form of hers into his arms.

And that he ran away. Like a coward.

Ethan Ramsey the coward.

Who could not fight for them.

Who could not fight for her.

Who could not fight for Lo-

No.

He did not let the word complete. The very thought was dangerous.

Throwing the classy cylinder he had been holding with a deathly grip, he poured the last bit of that glass bottle in him.

And walked over hurriedly, the tiny glass pieces stabbing him, to again begin the reset.

One which would never complete.

Next Day

Pooja

The ethereal moon spread out the beams of serenity all over the ceremonious night.

It was a lively affair. Merrymaking and cultural programs went on, as she stood amidst the cheery atmosphere with a sombre expression.

In front of Pooja, was the masterfully sculpted idol of the Mother Goddess, standing majestically as the centrepiece of the celebration. She was the epitome of power, the Mahisasura Mardini.

The recollections of an unforgettable past come as paper-planes drifting in a gentle air, carrying the playfulness, a child's happy smiles. A time when her mother would take Pooja to the mythological lands through her words, and they would get lost like flying butterflies in fairytale land.

The tunes of Bengali music float in the gentle air, and she hums along. The first song her mom had taught her, also for a Durga Puja function. Her mom was deeply rooted in all of them, the culture of Bengal kept alive by her. She was the reason why Pooja could become a part of a community she takes pride in.

Even now, so many years later, things don't change. They hold on to these roots like they are holding onto their life, not letting them disappear.

It feels like holding onto her, keeping her alive.

Recreating a small piece of her favourite Kolkata in Bhopal.

But the aura of calm hid like the clouds covering the sun's shine. The piercing pain of heartbreak came back, the wound untreated.

The soft sand of her life's hourglass prickles, solitary grains floating to join their siblings. The wish of them defying gravity and going back to bring the 10th year of her life had never been so strong as it was now.

The heavy jewellery tugged at her ears, letting her know their presence and the styled hair gave her a throbbing headache.

Her tiredness and exhaustion, now fuelling back in her veins refusing to let her bring back that sense of peace she experienced moments ago.

Around her people wore phoney smiles. All they cared about was unimportant Tommy rot. Not a single one of them stepped back from criticizing the others behind their backs.

It was a saga of inflated egos, of constant competition, to make the next person look inferior.

She was tired.

Of people running away, Of abandonment, Of hopes getting dashed.

Why did his thoughts keep coming back? After all, he did make it clear, didn't he?

But did he really succeed? Did his efforts head? Did his heart finally give in to his relentless demand?

Did he really forget her?

All the messages that lay not replied, unheard voicemails, she was sure he had.

But that colour of his he left on her?

The piece of his heart that was protected by her?

Would he be able to forget them?

An earthen lamp flickered in front of her, bud she did no rush to save it.

If it goes out, then let it.

Just like the never-ending load shedding of her life.

But it didn't.

It was a wish, a hope that kept it alive.

The sweet nothings he had whispered to her, the gentle kisses he lined on her forehead.

They had promised her forever.

His being enveloped her, she doubted if it would ever break.

The hope of him & her flickers every now and then, just like the earthen lamp.

But did it go off?

It couldn't.

Because there was no wind strong enough to extinguish it.

The possibility of him and her.

The realization and a blackness hit her at the same time.

And as she fell, her mind held on to only it.

The possibility of him and her.

Ethan

If the Great Thinkers from BCs before were asked if going to a beer garden after spending 2 months in another continent and a 13hr long flight was a sensible thing to do, they would have watched the questioner in bewilderment.

And he agreed. He was not being sensible, not even 1%.

The urge to see her, to gaze at her moonly face, to know that she okay.

It had never been so strong. He felt his mind would give up on him if he could not locate her today.

Not that he had stopped the forgetting process, absolutely not.

It was just a solace, a bandage to the scars he had given himself.

That she would be okay even if he was not there with her.

Focus fixed on keeping his gaze as unhurried as possible, he looked around, putting the well-trained ears and eyes to work.

And then he saw them.

All her friends clustered at a table, merrily clinking beer bottles and sharing happy glances. His eyes pierced into the scene, but he could not locate her.

A step or two brought him close, the desperateness making his heart go crazy.

But the conclusion shattered every bit of sense and calm, dissipated the hope of getting to see here.

She was not here.

His face fell like someone who had lost the thing they hold the closest to their heart.

She, really, was not here.

He really wanted to ask the residents sitting at the table in question, to get some, any, news on her.

But his rational mind still existed, and it was the only thing that stopped him from going haywire.

She was not here.

He took out the notorious cuboid chiming in his pocket, full of satirical typed phrases his cerebrum refused to decrypt.

But it was adamant to get his attention.

A scoff escaped like a habit.

As if anyone could be powerful enough to take his attention away from her.

He was caught in a maze of her memories, his time in the continent thousands of kilometres away and the ghoul of feelings chasing him deeper into it, making him yearn for her solace, the moistness of a forlorn kiss on his forehead, the gentle swipe of a thumb to take his tears away.

His way was lost in there, every turn making him end up more challenged. But even if he did not want to, he had to find the way out.

His soul was like a thorn who could only hurt the tender flower that she was.

What he did not realize was that she was a rose, her being was amidst thorns.

She had the power to beautify them.

The click of the turn-on sound, brought him back to the piece of work his fingers were creating on the light emanating screen.

And in seconds that passed too fast, he saw his heart's treasure,

She was here.

Not in footsteps & whispers.

She was here.

Not in touches and kisses.

She was here.

Not in muscle and bone.

But in labyrinths of his heart, in filmstrips of his memory, in sensations that made him go wild,

She was here.

(With him forever, she was not the one to leave his side)

PS: I HC the end of 1st year of their residency being in Sept-Oct, which is the time of Durga Puja in India. And since Poo is half Bengali, and she never misses any tradition involving her mom's side of the fam, so she would not have been at Boston then. (Or take it as an excuse to increase angst potential) Anyway, Thank you so much for reading and I hope you have a great day ahead! Love, Manamee🧡.

Tags (Please let me know if you want to be added or removed or if I forgot you I feel like my brain has short-circuited and I forgot someone):

Perma: @gkittylove99 @neotericthemis @udishaman @aestheticartsx @twinkleallnight @schnitzelbutterfingers @sophxwithers @sweatyrysconnoisseur @nikki-2406 @choicesfanaf @trrfanaddict @starrystarrytrouble @gardeningourmet @parkbarks @mvalentine @lovablegranny @mercury84choices @helloayz

Open Heart (All fics and edit): @lucy-268 @maurine07 @bellcat2010

Ethan x Pooja (fics): @aleynareads @stygianflood @choicesaddict5 @mysticaurathings @jamespotterthefirst @ilikemenbutonlyethanramsey

@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

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katsutomos · 5 years

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hello, i’m kosmo (she/her) and i’m v excited to be here hehehe! thank u for having me! ;; also i didn’t realise that both kosmo and tomo end the with the same letters & now i wanna d*e but oh well pls ignore that! (: anyw, i’m here introduce TOMO!! there’s probably some stuff i left out here but it ended up having a word count of almost 2.5k so i’m just going to stop myself while i’m ahead! i’ll finish off my stats & bio pages soon and then i’ll try to think up some plots but here’s all this for now!

(tw: suicide mention, brief drug mentions)

BASIC STATS

NAME / tomo katsumura; his full name is tomohiko but nobody calls him that except his mum & grandparents like literally everybody else knows him as tomo NICKNAMES / technically, tomo IS a nickname but he’s so used it that not using a nickname with him is :knife emoji: -- also katsutomo but that one’s more of fan-title-nickname rather than one he actually uses (as much as he came up with it himself tweeting it out like ‘you guys can call me katsutomo from now on if you like ^^’ before changing all his handles to that exact name). other than that, he’s a bit iffy about nicknames. he likes them if HE came up with them but giving him a nickname is usually Yikes City (unless he decides it’s cute and lets u do it, i guess) AGE & DOB / twenty-three & 6th november 1995 BIRTHPLACE / LA, USA ETHNICITY / japanese OCCUPATION / actor! he dabbles in modelling but it’s more of an ‘i got asked to model this thing bc i’m famous and they’re paying me (:’ type deal than it being something he’s actually personally into. whereas acting is his PASSION.

EARLY LIFE

to start with, let’s talk about his parents; his dad, born and raised in america, was an actor who eventually made a move into directing but ultimately committed suicide at age 38 & his mother, born and raised in japan, is a socialite who had started off as a teen idol in the 80s. his parents had also divorced when tomo was still young, a few years before his dad’s death, so he uses his mother’s surname. tomo does not get on with her but, thanks to the sense of guilt she’s raised into him, he can’t bring himself to cut her out of his life completely.

basically, she’s got hang ups about the way her idol career ended so she kind of pushed tomo into the spotlight (which was fine for him because he wanted to act) but she grew envious of him after he got out of his teens and doesn’t like the decisions he makes. it’s a mutual issue. they mostly don’t get on because they can’t see eye to eye or really speak to each other at length without arguing.

his mum actually wanted him to break into acting when he was about nine because he’d already taken an interest in it by then. because her career had ended early, she took the approach of ‘he won’t be cute forever, what if we wait too long and he loses his chance?’ but his father, who had his own issues with the industry, strongly disagreed. this disagreement was one small contributing factor for their divorce; they had plenty of other issues as well but this didn’t help. their compromise was that tomo could wait until he was in his teens and this deal was mostly held up because tomo thought it was wrong to break a promise with a dead guy.

to be clear though, he’d probably have issues with his dad too if he were still alive (and he’s not exactly super fond of him as it is; he doesn’t hate him but he doesn’t like being asked about being his son). he was kind of a shit husband and, if it weren’t for the fact he didn’t see tomo as often as he’d like, he’d probably be a pretty distant father as well. his work was pretty much his main priority and he had a lot of personal issues that he took out on other people.

tomo grew up in LA for the most part but also spent a lot of time in japan, mostly jumping between osaka, where his mother’s family lived, and tokyo, where his mother’s friends and connections & his father’s extended family lived. the family stopped travelling quite as much after his father’s death and tomo’s reaching high school age. he grew up bilingual.

CAREER

he started acting professional when he was 16, mostly with a few smaller tv roles but he had good connections and was able to get a small but still substantial role in the film directed by a friend of his dad. his big break came at age 18 when he landed a leaded a role in the main cast of high school drama. it was exciting at first, being on tv and being famous, but he hated both the show and his character so the whole thing got tired fast. he wasn’t allowed to quick so he went out of his way to get himself fired. there’s a whole story behind that but i’ll leave that for the bio hehehe! (he wanted his character to get killed off bc he thought it’d be fun to act out but they wouldn’t let him do that ): boooo)

one of his biggest issues with the tv show was that he didn’t like being sold as a product / character that wasn’t anything like him. he hated being shown off as this squeaky clean teen heartthrob type and not being allowed to have his own emotions & tastes. he found it mentally exhausting and, since then, he’s had a lot of issues dealing with the contrast between how he is as a person and how he’s seen by the media. he tries not to admit it but he’s terrified of being swallowed up by what other people think of of him and losing track of himself in the process. it’s made him a little paranoid.

since then, he’s avoided tv as much as possible. he prefers working on films in general but he finds the idea of playing the same character for too long incredibly unappealing. he enjoys taking on new roles and absorbing himself in that character & sometimes to the point of bordering on obsession so playing the same role not only plays into his fears of people seeing him as someone he’s not (i.e; whatever character it is) but he’s also scared of seeing HIMSELF the wrong way. he needs the separation.

tomo likes working on indie films or more artistic/niche studio films most of all. the promotion cycle isn’t as intensive and the characters tend to appeal to him more. he has appeared in a few blockbuster-type films but mostly because his bosses have pushed him into it or he’s had to taken on a multiple film contract with a studio in order to land a role he really wanted. (he once got int trouble for calling his own character in a blockbuster a ‘dumb bitch’ on twitter)

the bratpack article had a pretty heavy impact on him. it kinda just spoke to all of his worst fears of not really being a Real Person or being Sold A Certain Way. he wanted to get away from it without having to actually stop working because it’s the one thing that really keeps him stable. his eventual means of escape was a role in a japanese film. he’s been living in japan since then, having moved there to specifically hunt out a film to work on, to get used to the japanese industry/prepare himself and then get to filming. he’s come to milan straight from tokyo, not having seen any of the other brats in person during that time, but he’s had time to relax. sort of.

PERSONALITY

for the most part, tomo’s a friendly and energetic guy! (living up to his name a lil bit here bc tomo can mean ‘friend’ in japanese hehehe) when he’s at his best, he’s great company. he likes to stand out in a crowd, has a winning smile and enjoys a little bit of attention but also knows when to step back and look out for other people. he likes to play as hard as he works. the trouble is that, when things aren’t going well and he’s distressed, he tends to collapse in on himself. behaviour that seemed playful before looks straight up stupid and reckless instead. he’ll avoid attention but get frustrated because he craves it and do more reckless shit for attention. yet he’s pretty good at pretending shit’s fine, he’s still weirdly positive for a guy who feels all messed up — maybe he gets away with it because he’s a good actor. tomo has good days and bad days but there’s little warning as to which is which. it wasn’t always this way; it’s like something has broken his spirit. (i copied this from my app but asdghgsdf)

that’s why his archetype is The Contradiction,,,bc he doesn’t make any fuckin sense, woooeee! he’s this very bouncy, upbeat person and he likes having fun but he’s not really a very positive person in terms of outlook. he’s too high energy! his general vibe is everything’s going to shit but i’m going to have a good time anyway :D

actually, on that note...he IS :D

he doesn’t like crying in front of people which is rough bc he’s v emotional all the time. he’s a total crybaby when he’s drunk. if you drink with him, there WILL be a point at which you have to scoop him up off the floor because he’s found something over which to start weeping. OR he’ll end up calling you to panic about how he can’t find his way home, only for him to realise like 5 minutes later he’s phoning you from the steps outside his apartment building.

the kind of guy who can have a full-on breakdown in his room by himself and then just reappear & ask u if u wanna go for ice cream or smth bc he’s bored. like ok that’s done with, that already happened. it’s over.

anyw he’s always willing to give ppl advice if they’re feeling stuck. it’s not always great advice bc he’s basically shit at dealing with stuff himself. he’s not one of these ppl who gives great advice but can’t follow it himself, he’s more...he gives advice bc he’d feel bad if he didn’t TRY so the advice itself definitely varies in quality. he means well though.

don’t watch funny films with him because he will do one of either things; 1) not find it funny and sit through the whole thing like : | or 2) he’ll find it so funny that he’ll end up on the floor at some point. there’s no in between. it’s all or nothing with this fucker.

he really likes cute shit. he’s rich so there’s nothing stopping him from buying those overpriced limited edition hello kitty goods.

let’s not talk about how he enjoys acting bc it’s an escape where he can be Somebody Else but he can’t cope with himself being promoted as something that doesn’t feel like Tomo. that’s its own mess. i’m p sure he’d just unravel if anybody said anything about it.

OTHER STUFF

his hair is currently bright red. it’s a recent change but he was like ‘uhhhh if i’m going on this trip, i’m making a visual statement’ and that was that. he likes to go for more interesting colours when he’s not filming anything because it’s the only time he really gets to. i mean, he still has dyed hair in a lot of his films but it’ll usually be brown or blonde or something else more ‘realistic’.

tomo cares a LOT about the way he dresses and styles himself. he’ll probably complain if he has to do a promo/magazine shoot and he doesn’t like the outfit he’s been given. it doesn’t actually help him half the time and he just gets told to shut up but it’s the PRINCIPLE of it !!!!!!!!

he posts on his finsta probably way too often but that’s because his public social media is pretty filtered, given that he’s caused fusses on social media before. there have been multiple cases of him having to delete tweets and instagram posts because somebody in charge decided he was pushing the limit just a little too much and, granted, most of it wouldn’t be seen as risky (bc it’s mostly utterly pointless stuff that gets flagged up as risky, e.g; ‘i need to pee and i can’t find a bathroom. death is coming for me.’) if he hadn’t publicly complained about the tv show that made him famous several times on twitter but he did do that so, y’know, he’s seen as a liability. the unfortunate outcome of this is that his finsta story is often littered with fairly inane thoughts.

he’s not very good at watching himself in films. it depends on the film and he can do it but uhhhh let’s just say he once watched the one horror film he was in at the cinema (and didn’t like most of it bc he’s a wuss about that sort of thing) but he laughed during his own death scene. there were tears in his eyes. real tears.

he doesn’t like dating because...well, he likes the IDEA of it but he’s the type to really fall for someone and BASICALLY? he’s scared of being dumped! he’s a bright & appealing personality with just enough edge to balance it out but he’s a bit of an emotional screwball and getting people interested is easier than keeping them interested, leading to mixed experiences with dating so he’s settled for sleeping around a little instead. oh well, whatever works! (does it actually work? shhhh it’s a secret...)

he’s very much involved in the party scene, whatever country he’s in. it’s not something he talks about much (privately, i mean, bc DUH he doesn’t say it publicly) but he doesn’t exactly avoid drugs in anyway (code for...yeah, he’s done stuff). it’s all casual, he says, but he still does it. he does smoke cigarettes though and he’s a little dependent on that.

also i guess he got involved in that kinda thing deliberately because he wants to distance himself from the clean-cut, shiny heartthrob pretty boy image as much as possible. eventually, it just became a natural way of de-stressing and dealing with the constant frustration of his career. the unfortunate consequence of that is that he’s now got a bit of a Bad Boy/Wild Child image and he’s not entirely sure he likes that either. (the shift in image also means that some journalists will talk about him as though he’s ‘gone off the rails’ and, yeah, he hates that as well)

#bratsintro #ok i kept trying to review this to make sure everything's in order but iM...SICK OF READING IT SO hopefully it's fine as is ASDFGHGF #i feel like my eyeballs are gonna fall out if i look at this any longer so im just gonna hit post and tell myself to shut upASDFGHG #i think there's some stuff i forgot to put in here that WAS in the app so i might just put a link to it on my blog somewhere #except i forgot to save the final version of the app i actually sent so i CAN'T REMEMBER

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blue-dream-rhapsody · 5 years

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kugo-centric brave souls CFYOW campaign screaming

bc like what do you guys expect from me at this point

So with the first part of the campaign coming out in brave souls, likely more or less serving as the “official” translation, we’ve already got some interesting bits, both new things I’ve noticed and variances from the fan translations we’ve gotten so far (huge credit to missstormcaller for her work!! what’s been put out, she’s already translated wonderfully)

[any differences I point out between Brave Souls and fan translations are NOT criticisms/insults to the fan translators’ efforts. The BBS team likely has access to the original intentions of any line they put in, which means they could know for sure if they were presenting lines accurately. BBS also cuts text and minor scenes, so while it’s good for getting the basics across, there is also a lot of nuance that it will miss. Even if you play Brave Souls, read the fan translations. They’re much more in-depth.]

-oh real quick, Aizen at the start was interesting, when he talks about Tosen with Hisagi. Because there’s far less of his usual derision or condescension when he talks about Tosen. And even though what he says is incendiary to Hisagi by its very nature, his intention doesn’t come across as goading so much as a sign of respect. At first I thought I might’ve been seeing things differently without surrounding context and nuance (since BBS doesn’t describe things like facial expression or tone and uses stock expressions). But one of the very last chapters of the actual novel actually confirms this—Tosen held a genuinely special place in Aizen’s esteem, and was the only person he could ever confide in even remotely (like, keep in mind who we’re talking about here). He calls killing him an act of mercy not because it’ll get under Hisagi’s skin, but because that’s truly what it was, particularly in the mind of Tosen himself. It doesn’t make Aizen anything close to an uwu innocent babby but what it does do is make a character with no attachment to anything infinitely more interesting. After all, what fun is a stagnant god?

-And about the event story, it seems like Grimmjow and Nel’s second stages were supposed to be drawn out by Aura? Tokinada talks about her “puppets” being effective, and while she had a part in Hikone’s creation I think Hikone acts on their own here and isn’t being strung by her, so I don’t think they’re the puppet. Don’t know if I’m misunderstanding it, and if I’m not I don’t know if this implies the other Espada’s second stages will be her doing, too. And maybe she’s not drawing out the power itself and is just making them appear and disappear, and the Kyogoku/Valley of Screams makes them go into second stage somehow. (or it’s just an event story and means absolutely nothing??)

-Kukaku just casually called Shuhei’s eyes handsome and idk why that’s so funny to me

-Okay yeah there’s this thing, which could have some implications depending. The fan translations have Shuhei say he heard Kugo didn’t go to Hell, but Brave Souls has him say he’d heard Kugo had escaped from Hell. And uh, big difference. Like listen I love my boy but even I don’t think he’s powerful enough to rip himself out of HELL and crawl back to the Soul Society. It’s not that I don’t think there was reason enough to send him there, but I had always been under the impression that he had been spared from it deliberately, thanks to Ichigo and/or Ukitake (or perhaps Hell’s Sinner Detector™ knowing how fucked over he was and just not taking him).

-You know thinking about it, Shuhei does call this a rumor. And there are a metric fuckton of Soul Reapers who would be pretty pissed off if they found out Kugo Ginjo, Soul Reaper Hunter, was just hangin’ out in Rukongai. They’d probably go nuts trying to kill him, and tear down Kukaku’s house in the process. I wouldn’t be surprised Kugo’s identity and presence in the Soul Society has been kept very secret among a few Captains (at the very least Yamamoto, Kyoraku and Ukitake, and Kurotsuchi who can find out fucking anything), or at the whole Captain level. Everybody else who asks just gets told he’s in Hell where he belongs. There was probably a sighting at some point which started rumors he got out.

-“Shu... Shu... SHOOT, IT’S BEEN A WHILE HUH LIEUTENANT?” Ganju stop covering your tracks it’s okay we know you forgot

-Ganju says he won’t allow bad blood between Soul Reapers and the Shiba family (not “friends of”) and thereby kind of implies that the Fullbringers are members of the Shiba family. Kukaku says she accepts Kugo and co. for who they are, and calls him “our freeloader” (not “the”). Considering Kugo’s apparent lifelong lack of a place to belong, this little kind of thing hits me dead in the kokoro.

-It also sounds like Kugo makes a differentiation between a half Soul Reaper and a Substitute Soul Reaper, the first being a “biological” state one is born with and the second meaning someone given Soul Reaper powers while alive. This would mean Substitute and Deputy aren’t interchangeable: “deputy” is solely a rank for a sanctioned non-pure Soul Reaper, and they have to either be half or Substitute before they can have the “deputy” title. Both Ichigo and Kugo became Deputies specifically when they were given official passes. Kugo seems to say he was always a Substitute, as in someone given Soul Reaper powers while alive, whereas Ichigo’s Substitute powers were cut off by Byakuya early in the series and the ones he then regains are entirely his own from his father’s ancestry. So between his first Hollowfication and his getting the badge, Ichigo was neither a Substitute nor a Deputy. He was a half (or third or quarter or however it works out), and remains as much through the end with his Deputy status tacked on. (And presumably Kugo has lost his Deputy status, but I’m fairly certain he still remains a Substitute.)

-Use of the word “friends” instead of “comrades” or “allies” makes the masscre story sting worse. I consider this permission to use it in all my commentary now and spread the pain.

-Also, he makes it sound like they were killed by more than one Soul Reaper. Meaning he could’ve been outnumbered when they attacked, or they might’ve been scattered around targeting Fullbringers and he was only able to catch up to the one that he killed. Like, thanks! I hate it!

-Here he seems to say he learned about the pass at the point this happened, as opposed to figuring it out before and then surmising that that was how he was found. Literally I just wrote a part about this, why do you gotta play me this way.

-I should’ve realized this like forever ago but HE SAYS UKITAKE DIDN’T TRUST HIM FROM THE BEGINNING. BUT HE’S GONNA FIND OUT HE TRUSTED HIM LONGER THAN ANYBODY. KILL ME.

-Also oof, “But aside from me, why did my Fullbringer friends have to die, too?” Like, implying if he had to be killed because they didn’t trust him, then fine. Plus he was willing to die killing Ukitake if that’s what it took—because it’s not about himself, or him winning, or him being more powerful. It’s purely retribution for the lives taken, whatever the personal cost. You look me in the eyes and tell me this isn’t a man with a lot of guilt inside him.

-I’m mad they didn’t have Kugo and Shu’s little exchange (or Ganju and Kukaku’s) after Hisagi leaves, since there were like five story-free chapters while Shuhei bikes back to the barracks that they could’ve put something into. but fine I get it I know that’s not why most people are here it’s fine

-but you know what I do appreciate? They really kept true to Giriko’s role in this adaptation, very carefully portrayed him with as much weight as he has in the proper novel. I don’t feel like I’ve missed a thing where he’s concerned. So yeah if you need me I’ll be over here bleeding out in the corner

#bleach #bleach brave souls #can't fear your own world #ginjou kuugo #im hoping thisll be the longest one #except maybe for the reveal toward the climax #BUT YALL KNOW ME RIP

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brianna-lei · 7 years

Text

Butterfly Soup Asks #16

This time including the squad as DnD characters, Liz facts, Noelle getting her yaoi education, and more

I’ve only played Dungeons & Dragons once (1) in my life so I’m no expert! I’d consider my thoughts suggestions (like with my takes on the charaters’ MBTI types, which I’m not an expert of either):

Noelle as a Wizard sounds right, since she definitely can’t do anything reliant on physical strength. She would be an asshole and attempt things like building a Clone Army

AKARSHA THE BARD. Rogue sounds too cool for her

Diya: I actually want to say she’s a Ranger because the Wiki on 5th edition says “The Beast Master archetype forges a connection between civilization and beasts, allowing the character to interact with animals in certain ways including gaining an animal companion to control.“ Fighter and Knight also sound plausible though!

Min: Barbarian with high Strength and no Intelligence and Wisdom

I don’t want to say too much because I want to save things for the sequel, but here’s some stuff:

She actually played against Diya in youth leagues before she transitioned. That’s why she recognizes Diya+specifically approached her to sign the baseball club form while Diya doesn’t recognize her. At the first club meeting Liz tells her “I was at one of your games when you were little” -- This is purposefully ambiguous/misleading (sounds like Liz was just watching) because she passes and doesn’t want to out herself to a bunch of club members she doesn’t know well

After transitioning she quit baseball and switched to softball. It was weird being the one trans girl on a team of cis dudes, and additionally when she was younger she sort of felt like she had to prove she was a girl; she naturally has feminine taste, but she’d overperform it by 25%. It wasn’t until she got close to Chryssa and found out she also liked baseball that she reclaimed her interest in it

She has a nice resting face so strangers tend to ask her for directions

Sunburns easily

Yesss check the FAQ guys! Fangames are fine as long as you explicitly say it’s a fangame!!

I’m almost mad I didn’t think of this myself. I’m one of those people who overuses “spoopy”

All art in the game (including the title screen) can be downloaded here!

NO!!!

Noelle. The day the others find out will be the End of her

Akarsha was reading some yaoi so it came up in conversation, and since Noelle had never heard of it Akarsha gleefully educated her (to Noelle’s horror). Noelle was extremely scandalized that Akarsha kept sending her inappropriate images, and Akarsha was like “i’m doing this out of the kindness of my heart! it’s for ur education!! me: Master Teacher. call me sensei”

Following this Akarsha changed her chat name to YAOI SEME as seen at the beginning of the game

Diya and Noelle: Never tried it

Min: Has tried it

Akarsha: She constantly makes weed jokes but actually only does it rarely

Yes, I’m planning on exploring this more in the sequel!

Diya; Dee-ya. Rhymes with “See ya”

Min-seo: Korean way, but most characters like Diya pronounce it like Min-so, with the “Min” rhyming with “win” (not like “mean”). The “so” is one syllable (not like “see oh”)

Akarsha: uh-KAR-sha

Noelle: No L

I was planning on making the sprites blink! I’m still a bit sad I didn’t end up doing it

It’s supposed to be fall 2008 when they’re in high school, but I took a LOT of artistic liberties when it came to the references. For example, Akarsha makes a Durarara reference even though the anime didn’t come out until 2010, and there’s a lot of modern memes that ended up in there too...I couldn’t hold back...

The IGF trailer video is especially modern-day meme-wise -- since it broke the 4th wall, it was like, all bets are off. Don’t think too hard about it!

I wanted to put a lot of 90s and early 00s hits in the game for the nostalgia factor, like Complicated, Rock Your Body, Dilemma, etc. I think it would’ve made the experience even more surreal for players who are around my age!

I don’t own the rights to all the music so I can’t distribute it around for people to download! Here’s where you can find everything:

Thought Projection by Ketsa

Holding Your Breath by Ketsa

Thoughts of You by Ketsa

2011-13 by Ketsa

Miyauchi Yuri/110515 (miltata remix) by Miltata

Night Tourist by Miltata

Sound413_Images(short) by Miltata

Sound429_Floating Cloud (draft) by Miltata

Side by Side by Miltata

Blooming by Miltata

Romaras by Miltata

Little Circle by Miltata

Daydream by Miltata

Calling Project 2 by .que

Flame of Love by YOSHI

Valar Morghulis by Bloodgod

Overflowing by Tatsuya Kato

My Heart Will Go On - Recorder By Candlelight by Matt Mulholland

At one point Diya finds out what it means on her own. After she finds out, she uses it for the actual meaning :) (added this to the FAQ now)

I can totally relate to all of them, but I’d say Diya! (added this to the FAQ now)

that sounds a bit alarming

(I added this to the FAQ page now, thanks for reminding me) I’m fine with people shipping whatever!! The only thing I can think of that’d make me uncomfortable is incest and shipping Diya and Min with male characters – other than that, go nuts

Oh noo im sorry, that must’ve been stressful! For those who don’t know, I chatted about my game for a few minutes last week with MEGA (a USC club I used to be in!). I’ve adapted them here with what I assume what the questions were:

1. Is that your cat on your Skype icon?

yeah it is!! it's burrito

(people think it’s a cute name)

LOL glad you guys approve

2. Was the game made in Renpy? What do you think of Renpy vs. Twine?

yep! it's made in renpy! I actually started out in twine -- twine is impossible if your game is like longer than an hour and is image heavy. the engine started lagging so bad it would take 30 secs to do anything

2. Would you eat a tiny 2 inch man for $100 million?

LOL it's hard..it's a lot of money. I don't think I would

(but you could use that money to save many more lives! utilitarianism)

it's a real dude tho! i'd feel awful for him haha it's hard when you have to physically do it LOL

3. How long did it take for you to make Butterfly Soup?

FOREVER. I thought of it in my junior year over winter break

4. Was it for school (like an assignment)?

nah! just on my own

(people saying that’s impressive)

yeah!! self motivation

5. What’s your favorite part of the game?

hmmmmM I like the "date" with min in the dream. it's so fun, with the dog park

6. Which character do you relate to the most?

diya!! social anxiety queen, so relatable

(people comment on how she runs around when anxious)

i really did that before my sat once, ran 2 miles at the school's track

7. Are you from the San Francisco Bay Area

yeah i'm from the bay! east bay

8. Which year did you first come up with Butterfly Soup?

winter 2014 i think

(people trying to calculate which year was my junior year)

i graduated a year early so junior year was also senior year

9. Are you making a sequel?

yes!! once ihave more time. i have a lot of ideas for stuff that goes after

10. Was this a prequel to Pom Gets Wi-Fi? Or maybe spiritual successor?

this is a prequel. i dunno about spiritual successor tho, they're a bit differnt

11. Any tips on how to balance schoolwork and working on personal projects?

hmm...i honestly sucked at this and could only work on it on breaks lol...if you can try to work it into your school projects, like some bit of it...

other than that i cant think of anything LOL it's hard

12. How did you organize yourself making such a long game? Any tips?

it was SUPER hard to organize, i was really lost until i split it into 4 sections with each character. so if you're planning on making a game this big definitely think about forcing yourself into sections like that

the art was the most confusing to do bc of how many assets there were. i was going to say "have consistent naming conventions" but that's literally impossible LOL it'll always become inconsistent no matter how hard u try

13. What part of the game took the longest (writing? art?)

writing, actually, despite how much i complain about art assets. it's really hard making sure the structure and themes come across correctly. like pacing is so hard. art is like #2 biggest time sink

14. How early in did you write the Akarsha/Min skateboard scene?

that came pretty late haha i put it in at last second

15. Are the characters based on real people?

they're all inspired by combinations of ppl i know! i wouldn't say based on them, tho. for example min is like a combination of 3 friends i have, strategically arranged to play her part in the story

character design is design so u still gotta be deliberate about it

16. Who’s the other cat on the computer? (they’re referring to the cat on my desktop wallpaper)

that one's maru! he's a famous japaense cat. he's super photogenic

(people speculating that he’s the “tube one”)

the tube one? probably. he's famous for going into stuff

17. What was your favorite aspect of working on the game?

definitely getting to put specific Asian-American experiences into it

i was like HAHOH i can do this and no one can stop me! it was really fun getting to do this without any creative direction from like, a studio or anything. so i could just go bonkers. i hate pitching stuff so

18. Any writing advice?

definitely have other people beta your writing as soon as possible! they always catch stuff you missed. also this is like a cheat, make your characters really extreme. like find one aspect of yourself, and turn it up to 11 and make it into a character. that way they'll be relatable and memorable at the same time. i think most people don't make their characters extreme enough so they're all kinda samey

19. (I can’t remember what they asked me here, sorry! They were asking if a specific meme was in the game)

LMAO nah it's not. i did briefly think about it though, i will admit

20. Would you eat a Gusher the size of your hand?

that would be pretty cool. i don't think i could eat it all at once tho...i would try to save it. like half

You’re welcome, I’m really happy to hear it helped the game feel relatable!!

Thank you! I hope you have a good day too!!

haha I feel like my game is almost propaganda bc so many people wish they had girlfriends after playing it! the agenda...Thank you for waiting for the sequel, it makes me super happy to hear people are looking forward to it!

You’re welcome!! I’ll do my best!!!

You’re welcome!!!! :>

You’re welcome!!!

same I’m really happy so many people find them relatable! you’re welcome!!

You’re welcome!! my kids can never get enough love im very happy

I’m glad you liked it! Thanks for the support! TT_TT

#briANSWER #ask #my post #Butterfly Soup #socialpoison

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