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kindestegg · 1 year

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Alright, so as per anon's request, let's review everything wrong with the statements made by the person they claim to have messaged on Discord.

First off: "Collector controls who King is allowed to be around, and for how long."

Literally contradicted entirely by canon. Collector does not give a single flying fuck that he's talking to Eda and Lilith here presumably behind his back and in fact only checks when prompted to do so, if anything it's implied King doesn't know he knows but he won't say anything for King's comfort, only caring when it sounds like he may be in danger. There's also a "citation needed" here for the how long bit too, literally at no point in time is it ever stated he's keeping track of how long he spends away from their room. Next.

"Collector is the one who decides what kinds of games they 'play' (...)"

"We've been playing pretend forever, King. It is fun, but, what if we switch it up?"

Again, literally contradicted directly by canon. If anything it's implied it's King who has full control of what they play and Collector is trying to gently suggest something else before getting shut down.

It is correct Collector lashes out at King for telling him to play nicer. I'm not arguing with that. However I will direct you to this analysis of mine that showcases there's more to this than meets the eye, namely Collector's inability to question the Owl House game and expect this to be just how the game is played, not understanding why King is now telling him to stop. This is further backed by the rough and clean storyboards for the same episode and around the same scenes seen here.

Next.

"Collector makes King feel guilty for not being completely devoted to Collector-"

Citation needed. This is not something that is ever shown in canon, I can only guess this is this person's projection and trying to make sense of King's very real care for Collector. Next.

"and setting boundaries with him, and tries to manipulate him into giving up said boundaries (King definitely made it sound like they had the conversation about Francois multiple times before)."

Blatant misreading of canon at best and at worst straight up another contradiction. The scene here depicts a compromise, and I would advise you now to remember these are fictional characters being used for a narrative, and ask yourself first what the writers intended.

"You won't give this to me? That's okay, but can we meet halfway at least?" is basically the key idea here I imagine the writers intended. Reminder every time Collector asks for François it's posed as a question ("can I"), not a straight up demand which is more common for abuse tactics ("let me", "give me", "you need to", as just some examples of more abusive wording).

"And King never looks happy or like he's enjoying himself around the Collector."

Straight up contradicted by canon. Again. (Ok I know technically the first one is a glare but the intention of adding is that they're clearly acting together.)

(Closing eyes happily not made necessary by the game, done spontaneously.)

(Neutral at worst and at best positive.)

(Sitting normally, not panicking even when flipped, again neutral at worst and positive at best. Implied to be a fun activity to share.)

For the sake of not being nitpicked at, I won't add also the rough and clean storyboards, but those also reveal that King was very often depicted being happy around Collector and this was likely toned down in the final version to keep suspense over their relationship. I don't think King would blush at some point at him if he hated him.

"But all I ever see is people gushing about how much Collector 'cares' about King, and how he tries to 'protect' King and acting like it's cute."

Bonus round! Aw, are you talking about little old meeeeeee? That's so cute, but you missed out on all my deeper analysis I'm sure, or haven't been enough attention! Come on, say it to my face, I promiiiiiiiise I don't bite <3

Thank you for giving me something to play around with anon! I've been so bored and antsy with everything going on with my life and the finale just around the corner, so it's a nice shake up to be asked for a good debunking! Can I hang out with the cool kids like mossbag now?

#Commander's orders #im not tagging this im just having fun rly

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feistypaants-archived · 4 years

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Scene of Sentimentality

Rating: T Words: 2080 Pairing: Kristanna

Summary: Anna reflects on her ever growing feelings for Kristoff

[AO3]

Notes: Sometimes I get sad about how infrequent Anna’s feelings are shown in canon. So I wanted to write something small about her reflecting on her feelings for her fiancé. It means a lot to meeeeeee.

Enjoy!

Anna stood quietly, tapping her ring against the champagne flute in her hand, a soft smile playing at her lips as she watched her fiancé laughing at the edge of the ballroom. He had come to find his footing in these settings, even if he wasn’t the biggest fan of larger events, and Anna was more and more impressed with him each day.

Her coronation was the worst, Kristoff just standing by awkwardly as she could barely get a moment to say hello to him, much less get to help ease the tension for him. She hated knowing he was uncomfortable, hated knowing it was her fault that he was stuck in this situation. Anna knew that if he had the choice, Kristoff would much prefer to be in the mountains, but he loved her enough that he stayed with her, even if he hated it.

“Your Majesty?”

Her attention turned back to the dignitary from who knows where with whom she was speaking to before she got distracted.

“Oh, goodness, I’m sorry.” Anna lifted the glass to her lips, sipping lightly before covering her mouth with her hand. “You were saying?”

More than once, she was distracted by Kristoff. Something about him just fascinated her from day one, and when his gaze found hers through the large room of people, Anna felt her smile grow.

She remembered the first time it happened, after they fell two hundred feet off a cliff’s edge. After he lifted her out of the snow like she was nothing, after he looked at her and asked her what now? His deep honey eyes locked onto hers, and suddenly she was imagining his broad body hoisting her up and her whole face flushed as she remembered this is not the time, Anna!

And it happened again a couple of days later after he kissed her on the docks and turned her knees to jelly. She watched with pure adoration as he ran towards the sled, admiring all of its upgraded features. It was then that she knew she would do whatever it took to keep that big smile on his face.

Then he looked up at her, practically skipped back to where she was glued to the spot, and grabbed her hands.

Wanna go for a ride?

It was almost a childish glee that had taken over him, and Anna knew that the little flutter in her heart was real this time, not just desperation, and after their week together, she knew she could trust him not to break her.

She bit her lip before nodding enthusiastically, watching with interest as Kristoff hooked up Sven, and climbed up into the carriage as soon as he waved her on, his hands outstretched to help pull her up.

Where do you want to go?

Anna scooted a little closer, pretending to ignore the pink that had spread across both their cheeks. Anywhere, she smiled, before correcting herself. Everywhere. Then she grabbed his hand, lacing their fingers together. As long as you come with me.

He had let out a huff of a laugh before grabbing the reins with one hand and squeezing her fingers with the other.

Alright, Sven. Let’s take her highness anywhere and everywhere.

It became an everyday thing, her being distracted. She’d look at him across the table, across the room, across the courtyard, and her face would warm, a dopey smile pulling at her lips as he continued to do whatever he was doing. He didn’t even need to be doing anything special, really. Once she caught him just fixing his boots, sewing up a hole in the side, and just the pure reliability of it all made her fall even harder.

Maybe she knew how to be a royal, but it wasn’t until Kristoff was in her life that she learned more practical things - how to sew, how to start a fire, how to find her direction without a compass - and she was forever grateful for it.

Especially when…

Anna shook her head, not wanting to relive that.

She couldn’t bear being apart from him now, so she politely excused herself before crossing the floor with less grace than was expected of her, and practically threw herself at her fiancé, who, as always, was ready to catch her.

“Hi, baby,” he smiled, pressing his forehead against hers as her arms wrapped around his neck.

I love you, baby! Anna had felt the fondness spread across her features again, as he slid up to her, his bashfulness taking over. I do…

She loved him, too. So much, from day one. More each day, for always.

She lifted her hands to his cheeks, nuzzling her nose softly against his. “Hi, honey. I missed you.”

A woman beside them coughed loudly, rolling her eyes before walking away with a smile. They parted only slightly, his hands resting on her hips. “It’s barely been an hour,” he teased, placing on kiss against her palm as she stroked a gentle hand down his cheek.

“Yes but it’s our engagement announcement.” Anna clasped her hands together behind his neck. “I shouldn’t have to be away from you for even a minute.”

Kristoff rolled his eyes, but tightened his grip on her. “And her majesty should have whatever she so pleases, right?”

“As should my prince consort,” she hemmed, turning her nose up slightly in mock snobbery.

The first time they talked about their future, Anna had been so nervous that nervous was an understatement. They had been together for about eight months, and while everything was going so, so well, she knew that her lifestyle could be stifling, to put it mildly. Things had been better since the gates were opened, but for someone who lived a free life on the mountains…

Anna walked with him slowly up the stairs of the palace, their fingers interlaced as they climbed to their favorite spot on the roof. The way his hand squeezed hers gently, Anna knew he knew that this conversation might be a rough one, but they both held steady.

They sat, her curled up against his side, his fingers playing in her hair.

You know I love you, right? She had asked, her fingers playing with the hem of her skirts. I love you so, so much, and I can’t believe how lucky I am… and…

He had quieted her with a soft kiss, one arm pulling her closer to his side. I know, he had replied, kissing her again and again and again until tears started to fall down her cheeks. She just wanted him to be happy. She just wanted to be with him.

She was afraid those things wouldn’t align.

But he had tucked her up under his chin and told her that wherever she was, that’s where he wanted to be. Whether it was in a castle or in an abandoned barn… She was his home now.

Anna had cried more, kissed him again, and immediately commissioned them a cabin up in the secluded woods of the mountains. One that they spent many many days hiding in alone, showing one another just how in love they were.

Her cheeks reddened as his eyes tracked over her exposed skin, her low neckline exposing more of her than was usual for a royal, and she pressed an accusatory finger to the bottom of his chin. “Don’t look at me like that,” she protested, guiding his gaze elsewhere. “We have to stay until the end of this party.”

It wasn’t usually Kristoff who made them leave early, though, and his arched eyebrow told her that he was thinking exactly this.

She couldn’t help herself, though.

He always got dressed up for her, and that sacrifice alone was enough to make her want to get him undressed and comfortable again as quickly as possible. But he never had any objections anyway.

Dropping her hands to his lapels, Anna busied herself with straightening them as his arms tightened around her waist. “Thank you,” she sighed, finger scratching at a speck on the metal button of his coat, the same as the first time he had done this for her.

One hour, he had firmly stated, his expression smug. You get this for one hour.

Six hours, fifteen minutes, it was all the same to her. Kristoff had talked to the tailors to make him a suit that matched her gown, he had taken it into his own hands to do something so thoughtful, and Anna loved him even more that day, even if she hadn’t thought it possible.

He reluctantly agreed when the palace staff insisted he have a few more made, because the townspeople were truly head over heels for the complementary wardrobe, and Anna had made sure to properly thank him for it.

Kristoff never wanted this life, but he wanted her. If Anna had the choice, she’d probably leave it too, if he asked it of her. But he never would, because he knew she loved it - loved the camaraderie, the parties, the ability to help those who needed it - but she loved him more than all of that.

That frightened her, once.

A tap on her shoulder brought her back to reality. Kristoff’s hands had moved to rest protectively on her waist as another young prince from some other kingdom came to congratulate them.

He asked for a dance, and Anna graciously agreed even if she was rather annoyed to have to leave her fiancé again.

But the prince was kind. He enthusiastically congratulated her. Told her he had heard about what had happened with that prince from the Southern Isles - his reputation still not enough for other kingdoms to learn his name - and that he was happy she had found something real.

Anna smiled softly, looking over the prince’s shoulder to Kristoff, who was now leaning against the wall and watching her, a small flicker of jealousy in his eyes.

When they returned home and the highs and lows of their most recent adventure had worn back down to level ground, Kristoff had sat her down anxiously, rubbing his fingers over hers as he struggled to find his words.

I think, he stammered, twisting his mouth from side to side, that there’s probably someone else out there… more deserving of you and everything you have to offer…

Anna had immediately tightened her grip on his shaking hands.

And I understand that I’m just… some commoner who you happened to like and who really, really liked you.

She scooted closer, her knees brushing his as he did his best to get the rest of the words out.

I love you, more than anything. I always have, and I always will. And I think that’s important, right? His eyes had welled up, as had hers, as she crawled into his lap, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck.

I just… I want to be right for you. I want to be everything you need me to be.

Anna had pressed a firm but chaste kiss to his lips, sighing through her nose as his arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer.

You already are, Kristoff, she mumbled against his mouth. You’re more than that.

He had kissed her senseless, then, more and more giving each time she whispered a soft I love you into his skin, burying herself even deeper into his heart.

With a small curtsey from her and a lower bow from the prince, Anna was determined to spend the rest of the night right by her fiancés side. Ignoring everyone else, she stepped up to his side, sighing with relief as his arm came around her shoulders and held her closer as he finished his conversation with someone she didn’t quite recognize.

When they left with another bow, Anna turned, wrapped her arms around Kristoff’s waist, and pressed her nose into his shoulder. “Hey,” she muttered, smiling as he waved off a concerned Kai. “I love you.”

The way he held her now, the way his fingers dug into her, she knew he wasn’t letting her leave his side even once more this evening.

She was completely fine with that.

Looking up at him, her eyes glimmered as he smiled down at her. “I can’t wait to marry you,” she whispered, meant only for them.

Kristoff kissed her forehead gently, and Anna knew, right here in his arms, was where she was meant to be for the rest of her life.

#kristanna #kristoff #anna #feistypantswrites #kristanna fanfic #kristanna fanfiction #canon

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theghostofagentweiss · 3 years

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Safe Haven My Ass - Part 1

There was nothing exactly fun about being trapped in this RV traveling thousands of miles with these Hateful Eight rejects but thankfully for Clay time really had no meaning. In the moment it felt like forever since nothing physically really indicated a passage of time for him like hunger or need for sleep. Looking back at the journey however it had felt like nothing. Just a big blank. A blink of time as if they had simply teleported. But no, he knew that wasn't right.

Names. Names. What were their names?

Um... Mayonaise or... Leonidas or something like that.

Uh... Cross... Criss? Criss Cross applesauce?

Fuck, he forgot it all. His one job the one thing he was there to do and he was failing so miserably at it. Being a ghost was terrible. Everything just slipped through your fingers so easily. Nothing mattered physically but everything mattered mentally and he couldn't hold onto it anymore.

He stayed with Bancroft the whole way, trying no to let him out of his sight for a moment. As they kicked the bed to wake up the other guy and Bancroft woke up as a result Clay smirked, arms crossed. He hated this fucking fuck.

"Yeah, kick his bed again. Were you cold last night, Banksy? Yeah, ghost fart. Deal with it."

Clay stretched with a few of them though he didn't need to. It was a habit, he supposed, from sitting still so long. From his brain thinking he was also waking up, perhaps? He wasn't sure but he assumed his mind sometimes forgot he was dead and imitated the living humans around him. Though this wasn't exactly a crowd he wanted to imitate.

"Seriously? You're making him tea?" Clay groaned. "What next? Crumpets? Gonna paint his nails? Why don't you just wipe his ass for him while you're at it. Oh and great, you got him a personal chef. Seriously." Clay stepped closer to Rowan, getting in their face with confusion. "This guy failed so hard core. Why are you treating him like royalty? He's not all that. He threw a tantrum and blew the whole operation. He didn't even successfully recruit ONE powered person to Hydra. Not ONE! All he did was kill me and get his ass caught and I was a level one. I'm not even worth him getting a reward for taking me out. I'm like chess pawn, red shirt, background storm trooper level canon fodder useless in the grand scheme of--Oh, I'm making myself sad."

"Seems to be a draft coming from somewhere. Kept giving me chills."

"HaHA! Fucker! That was MEEEEEEE!"

About 45 minutes passed in a blink and he witnessed Bancroft wake from a little cat nap. Clay had mostly spent the time doing cartwheels through him. It had been mostly silent between the two of them which hadn't helped him in gathering intel. Not that he was great at remembering any of it anyway. Clay had spent the time naming every pokemon he could remember and just in case any of it got through, he whispered them in Bancroft's ear from time to time just to be annoying.

“I shall be fine,”

"Stubborn." Clay shrugged. "Gonna take you a damn hour because you're too proud to get a hand with your bags, you old man."

As Clay followed them out from the RV to cabin the scene looked warm, but Clay couldn’t feel any of it. He couldn’t feel the shift in temperature from the RV to the outside to the cabin. He could see the fire and watch the flames dance in the fireplace and he could see that it SHOULD be warm but... he didn’t feel it. It bothered him more than he cared to admit, not that anyone could hear him if he did admit it. He had to find out where he was. He had to figure out a way to talk to Ray and Germaine. He had to tell them what was happening.

Clay stuck close to Bancroft but he looked around the cabin for a map or anything that would indicate where they currently were other than the middle of nowhere wilderness.

But just because he could tell the room was supposed to be warm... he passed through Bancroft again. It was really all he had in terms of entertainment right now and boy, was it endless fun.

@thebowlofhygieia @elijahlawrencebancroft

#thebowlofhygieia #elijahlawrencebancroft

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la-paritalienne · 4 years

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Eve!!!! Need your thoughts about Taylor's album!!!! 💓💓💓💓💓💓

i love getting asked :”(((((( :”))))))) thank uuuuuuuu. let’s get to it. as usual, it’s an almost-first impression (normally i write my basic thoughts during the first listen – yeah i’d started doing it before getting this, you know, just in case – and then i review them w a second one, where i also select my favourite passage). sooo, let’s go

♡♡♡♡

the 1 — such sweet yet heartbreaking lyrics... very soft sound, if it sets the mood for the album im 100 per cent in! This one didn’t stick w me after one listen, but after the second i was like wooow! I love how she says waking up alone ughhh. 8

fave lyrics: persist and resist the temptation to ask you / if one thing had been different / would everything be different today?

cardigan — !!!!!!! the sound has that bittersweet something that gets under your skin and makes you nostalgic for something you can’t even pinpoint. it reminds me of the softest lana, especially in nfr (eg bartender!!). i’m in awe. instant obsession!!!! the ending takes you to another plane of existence – ‘cause i knew everything when i was young... i knew you’d miss me... you’d come back to me. also i’m crying. 10+

[it’s hard to choose bc the whole song reads like poetry but i’m especially obsessed w] giving me your weekends; once in twenty lifetimes; tried to change the ending / peter losing wendy; you drew stars around my scars

the last great american dynasty — storytelling on pointttt and sound, too! telling the story of someone she bought her house from?? the genius jumped out. she paints it like a romantic portrait, mad woman pacing on the shore, but then also gatsbian, the crazy parties, dali... and then takes it back to today w the key lime green dog, idk, iconic. i want to know this woman. this song truly takes you somewhere else, i thought it was a bit repetitive but then the bridge came in and the final vocals plus i had a marvelous time ruining everything, i have to stan! 8+

there goes the maddest woman this town has ever seen / she had a marvelous time ruining everything

exile — ok wow, bon iver’s voice is something else!!!! i was kind of ignorant when it came to him, i admit. his depth and rasp paired with how angelic she sounds... heavenly. sound-wise, but also thematically, this vaguely reminds me of tomorrow never came w lana and sean ono lennon. (one of my fave songs of all time maybe?). the way they enunciate i think i’ve seen this film before is literally a work of art all in itself, not to mention – well i’m mentioning it bc it’s worth it! – the you never gave a warning sign vs the way she goes over it w i gave so many signs. god this makes me feel sooooo sad and like, involved. it’s so beautiful. 10

you’re not my homeland anymore / so what am i defending now?

my tears ricochet — ok wtfffff??? everything about this speaks to my soul. the airy voice, the way she sets the scene... sunlit room, the funeral metaphor, you turned into your worst fears. i didn’t have it in myself to go with grace speaks to me more than anything, but just, everything about the lyrics. truly something else, cursing my name / wishing i stayed gives me chills everytime she says it. the beat that gets more insistent towards the end, with the bridge....... the high notes that then fade..... just wow. 10

and i can go anywhere i want / anywhere i want, just not home / and you can aim for my heart, go for blood / but you would still miss me in your bones / and i still talk to you when i’m screaming at the sky / and when you can’t sleep at night you hear my stolen lullabies

mirrorball — love the lyrics, maybe a bit less the sound? i mean i do love the sound, so far i’m loving how softly produced and coherent this album is, but this one i wouldn’t listen to on repeat and maybe there’s something a bit whiny that i don’t love. powerful meaning tho, and who’d use a mirrorball as a metaphor for feeling like you’re fragile, trying too hard to be a people-pleaser and no one sees the real you? 7

i’m still trying everything to keep you looking at me

seven — ah........ i started crying as soon as this one started, pleeease picture me in the trees, i hit my peak at seven....... like ok there’s no need to go that hard??? it’s so dreamy and like... naïf? in a perfect way. the way she says i still got love for you...... and everything else... she mentions folk songs... the purest love described in the purest way. i don’t think i have enough words to descrive the way this song moves me. like i want to listen to it again and again, to be able to feel like that again, but also i’m almost scared to listen bc it touches me too deeply. i still will tho hehe. 10+ (also just realised this is track 7 ok makes sense but my mind is blown. 100)

[this is literally deeper than a shakespeare sonnet so everything literally is my fave but, having to choose] and i’ve been meaning to tell you / i think your house is haunted / your dad is always mad and that must be why / and i think you should come live with me / and we can be pirates / then you won’t have to cry / or hide in the closet / and just like a folk song / our love will be passed on

august — i love the contrast between the lighthearted, happy singing and guitars and the sad lyrics. the story it tells is so simple and yet there’s so much poetry in that... plus it reminds me of fearless or even speak now?? which are like. the taylor that gets to my heart, tbh. the bridge and the outro made the song for me. 8,5

for me, it was enough / to live for the hope of it all / canceled plans just in case you’d call

this is me trying — oh god... lyrically this song is so raw and honest, it gives me chills! i do have to say, i don’t love how she says i just wanted to know (like metrically?? idk, im weird) but these are really just small comments on amazing songs, bc i feel like all i’m saying is wow this is great, lyrics and sound, but it truly is a complete and consistent work of art, easily listened to top to bottom each time. 8-

they told me all of my cages were mental / so got wasted like all my potential / and my words shoot to kill when i’m mad / i have a lot of regrets about that

illicit affairs — ok this goes without saying but i love storyteller taylor, it’s the taylor i grew up loving and singing to in my room. the thing about most of these songs, this one included, is that they probably grow on you after a few listens, bc they’re not made to be catchy, the production and backgrounds are always very soft and some i love more than others. this one musically maybe isn’t my fave but the narration is on point, and the bridge?? the fuckkkk. plus it has one of mt favourite themes ever which is so rarely spoken about, which is the fact that language you only speak w a particular someone you love, makes you miss them even more when they’re gone. or well not exactly this but i can’t put it into words, she did tho. 8+

you taught me a secret language i can’t speak with anyone else / and you know damn well / for you, i would ruin myself / a million little times

invisible string — the color theme!!! the guitar strumming!!! and the idea of an invisible tie w someone special... i do think she outdid herself w this album. again, not my fave soundwise, maybe slightly whiny when she goes meEeeEee? but, lyrically adorable and moving. 7,5

one single thread of gold / tied me to you

mad woman — maam...... this is iconic shit........ how could she say stuff like this w such a dreamy, breathy voice. musically i get huuuge lana’a nfr vibes again (which i mean. goals) but i also adore that lyrically it’s so taylor, no one would say this shit the way she does. adore how she sings to wrap your news around and bonus for women like hunting witches too, i do love me a nod to the fact that some women are so deeply filled w machism that they’re basically men in disguise. 8,5

every time you call me crazy, i get more crazy / what about that? / and when you say i seem angry, i get more angry [isn’t this just womanhood condensed in a few lines]

epiphany — aw! it sounds like a lullaby, maybe it’s slightly ‘boring’ for my taste? meaning i get distracted which is surely a shame bc the words seem beautiful, but it’s so soft i just drift off? but reading the lyrics – for focus hehe – i’m moved. 7+

only twenty minutes to sleep / but you dream of some epiphany / just one single glimpse of relief / to make some sense of what you’ve seen

betty — okay byeeeeeeeeee. this is taylor at her finest! countryyyyyyyy, storytelling, lesbian jdjdfk no yeah I know I knowww, romance went sour. gut wrenching and beautiful, this feels like... watching a sad teen movie but w a sepia filter, idk. i dreamt of you all summer long oh my......... it’s like og taylor from her iconic first couple of albums came back but w all her baggage and growth and experience and better than ever. also why does taylor sing so wel about being in love w a woman????? well. 10+

betty, right now is the last time / i can dream about what happens when / you see my face again

peace — ..........yes yes yes. the high notes, the honesty, the syncopated parts where she says so much so quick and yet it still hits you. it’s not even a short song but it ends too soon, it goes by like that..... a poem. omg it just hit me this has flo vibes! especially from high as hope, for example grace or south london forever?? i mean... taylor doing alt folk country pop...... queen. give you my wild, give you a child?? ok ok. 10

all these people think love’s for show / but i would die for you in secret

hoax — weeeell the lana inspo jumped out w that piano!!!!! and like. mood. and lyrics...... this reminds me of wuthering heights or of lana’s tormented love stories (shades of blue.....). a powerful closer. poetry. 9

i am ash from your fire

♡♡♡♡

okkkkk this was a flattering review, very well deserved imo since the review is mine gjgjhkhk i agree w myself. thank you again and as i always say, feel free to come back w your comments! and have a great dayyyyy! much love

#taylor swift #folklore #also bonus points for the title #fave ever from her #10 #should i tag my reviews #(i think this has now become the tag)

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tayreacherous · 5 years

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Reasons why to love the rep tour Movie:

- rep rep rep rep rep rep on the floor

- the way Taylor says the 1st "Are you ready for it?" on the front right catwalk after the bridge

- how in awe she looks at the crowd just before IDSM

- the sarcastic "A HAH HAH HAH"

- them hip hits in IDSM

- "if he spends my change then he had it comINGHHH"

- the dancers lying on the stage and the way they are epicly filmed

- the slay faces of all the dancers when they walk towards the camera when Taylor sings "light me up"

- HER EXPRESSIONS WHEN THE CROWD CHEERS

- THAT LITTLE JUMP

- how many times Taylor says "thank you" just between IDSM and Gorgeous

- all the girls slaying during Gorgeous

- THEM BOOTY ROLLS

- THE FANS WITH THE TRIANGLES

- every single clip of a fan during Gorgeous

- the introduction of the ladies of rep tour

- Mer and Dibbles

- HOW STYLE STARTS

- Gracies cute dancy walk next to Taylor on the catwalk

- THE BAND WALKS OUT

- PAUL AND AMOS!!!!!

- Taylor's royalish walk to Paul

- "I got tired of waiting" *Taylor showing an invisible watch to Paul*

- Paul gets a BOOP on the nose

- Amos being extra with the bass

- the smoothest glide from Love Story to YBWM

- "LET ME SEE YOU JUMP"

- how Taylor rises from underneath the stage

- the snake on the screen attacking the dancers

- "THE WORLD MOVES ON ANOTHER DAY ANOTHER DRAMA DRAMA" and everything about the rock vibe and beat

- KARYN RISES

- the line "and nobody trusts meeEEEEE" but the end is HIGH AND COOL

- Tiffany Haddish

- *dance* "OOOH LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DoooOOOHH*

- the gang vibe vibe in End Game

- "you like the bad ones too" *pause*

- how Taylor takes the dress off for KOMH

- the way KOMH was filmed... EVERY CLIP IS PERFECTION FINALLY WHAT THE PERFORMANCE DESERVES

- the choreoraphed drumming

- "i've been waiting" "waiting"

- *Taylor waves the Robert bye excitedly after KOMH ends*

- THE DRUMS THE DRUMS THE DRUMS

- THE DANCERS THE DANCERS THE DANCERS

- THE END VOCALS OF KOMH

- the cameras filming the light up crowd

- "I can see absolutely every person in this stadium"

- the Delicate speach

- the brunette girl crying during the speech

- 1,2,3 LETS GO BITCH!!!!!!

- Taylor counting

- Taylor almost kind of expressing the lyrics like she was talking them to the crowd

- the fairy light balcony being lifted

- the fans holding up their rep room photos

- Delicate booty shake!!!!!!

- Taylor waving to the crowd IT'S SO CUTE

- the angle of the camera and how the light reflects during the bridge of Delicate

- ALL THE GOOFY DANCIN DURING SIO

- Charlie, Camila and Taylor... that's it

- the funfetti lights of the bracelets

- everyone just having a good time

- GIUSEPPE PRESENTING THE TISSUE

- the angles of the clips of Taylor during the speech before DWOHT

- "how much we meet at the shows or like... at my house"

- the guy in the crowd FULL ON SOBBING (lol same)

- "I could've spent forever with your hands in my pockeeets/Picture of your face in anninvisible lockeeet"

- crowd screaming "i'm a mess but i'm the mess that you wanted" louder than other lines

- the phone type of editing to the video

- "so i was like... Okay!"

- "and that's how you've changed this song All Too Well for me"

- crowds reaction to ATW

- the one crazy hand in the crowd just flop waving

- Taylor playing the guitar before the bridge

- everything about the bridge of ATW

- THE WINK BEFORE "BUT YOU KEPT MY OLD SCARF"

- "I'm gonna come and see you.. Here I come!!"

- all the happy faces when Taylor walks through the crowd

- someone taking a selfie with one of the guards

- someone has a dog

- blonde girl crying mascara

- the amazing filming of Blank Space

- THE TWO LITTLE GIRLS IN THE CROWD WITH THEIR HANDS ON THEIR MOUTHS

- Giuseppe coming with the Dress dress

- Giuseppe getting a BOOP on the nose

- how the first verse of Dress is filmed

- the editing and visuals of Dress

- "say my name and everything just STOPS"

- THE BAD BLOOD BEAT

- how the snake balcony scene starts

- the SSN banjo melody on top of the BB beat

- Maho and all the other aerialists!!!!!!

- SHOULD'VE SAID NO

- the bracelets during it

- the band getting their shining moment while Taylor changed

- the wide shots of the stage during DBM

- "halooOOH"

- the shots of Taylor on her knees

- Paul's guitar solo

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hoodwinkedtoohoodvsevil · 7 years

Text

OKAY i have so much to say about dm3 so here’s my #Thoughts (spoilers) IT’S REALLY REALLY LONG

tl;dr i loved it bc of course i did but if you want my spicy feelse it’s below the cut

OKAY i’m basically doin this off the cuff scene by scene from memory (i’ve seen it twice) but also touching on just. aspects of the movie as i think of them.

i’m gonna start by saying what everyone knows but idc i’ll say it until the end of time: I LOVE FELONIUS GRU SO MUCH OHHH MY GOD HIS EXISTENCE MAKES MY LIFE GOOD

ALSO!!!! RLY MAD AT THE MARKETING OF THIS MOVIE BC IT COMPLETELY /LIES/ ABOUT GRU’S INTENTIONS!!! HE HAS NO INTENTIONS OF GOING BACK TO VILLAINY AT ALL THROUGHOUT THE MOVIE HIS ENTIRE PLAN IS TO STEAL THE DIAMOND BACK FROM BALTHAZAR TO GET HIS+LUCY’S JOBS BACK SO BASICALLY GRU IS PERFECT

oky so i thought the movie was RLY GOOD it basically does everything good that the first two movies do. the girls are in this more than 2 which is a big improvement. 2 may always be my favorite just bc it’s mostly abt grucy but 2 has the biggest flaw of them all (it’s fuckin racist as hell) so at least dm3 isn’t as...flawed.

it’s main problem is that it’s got a looot goin on, which is kinda common for sequels (especially third movies onward) bc they gotta give existing characters that everyone knows/likes plots/development while also establishing/developing new characters. i don’t really mind this so much bc i like all the characters in this movie a lot. i do like some plots/subplots more than others but i personally was never like. overwhelmed. the only subplot i didn’t rly care about was the minions one but i’ll talk abt that later. it’s not terrible tho.

MY main problem (basically the only thing that bothers me when i watch the movie) is how soooo fast paced it is. like, i get that the other movies kind of are too, but i can think of multiple parts of this movie where it just would’ve been better to just. let stuff sit? like okay, i have some examples that i’ll address when i get to them.

okay actually goin scene by scene now

first scene is good it’s basically just the first trailer but longer. i’ve said this before but i had the clownfish part it’s the worst part of the whole movie. but at least it’s only like two seconds. agents grucy is still my reason for existence and i’m kinda salty they never called back to that but i’m still blessed. balthazar is honestly so fuckin funny and Truthfully i liked the part when he blasts (naked) gru away with his keytar way better in the actual movie than in the trailer bc playing jump by van halen during that part was fucking HYSTERICAL.

gru...is so fucking funny and extra. “i don’t want to waste another breath on him. AND ANOTHER THING!!!” honey please chill. also “you’re making me nervous” BABY NO

okaaay buuuuuut the scene after they get fired slays me. “honey, you didn’t have to do that, i know how much you love your job” “well, there are some things i love more” LITERALLY MURDER MY ASS GRUCY IS MY REASON FOR LIVING

also catch my ass overanalyzing what gru says and tracing it back to lucy’s backstory (her parents were killed by supervillains when she was very young for those who don’t spend their free time researching everything about dm canon). she didn’t just love her job bc it was fun, it had significant meaning to her and just. excuse me I’M NOT CRYIN

“we should really tell the girls...can you do it?” girl same

the luau scene isn’t new to me so i don’t have much to say except that I Love My Daughters More Than Life Itself.

OKAY OKAY BUT here’s an example of the too fast paced parts i’m talkin about. when gru tells the girls that he and lucy lost their jobs, i read the jr novel before i saw the movie and i thought that part would be/should’ve been slower. like when he goes “lucy and i were invited to...not work at the avl anymore.” like? it just felt like he’d be a little more hesitant when telling him. just felt like it should’ve had a tiny bit more weight to it.

also “and let’s NOT go to katie’s house anymore.”

listen. i don’t hate the minions catch my ass defending them most of the time but i’m so salty at them in this movie. i get that their purpose is to serve the baddest villain but they’ve been with gru for like 45 YEARS THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE FAMILY!!!!! aso gru has been away from villainy for like more than a year so can they just chill please. these minions ain’t loyal.

I KNEW DR. NEFARIO WAS GONNA BE FROZEN IN CARBONITE BC JR NOVEL BUT I DIDN’T REALIZE HE WAS GONNA BE IN THE EXACT SAME POSE AS HAN SOLO SO I LOST MY SHIT. AND WE NEVER SEE HIM GET UNFROZEN SO IS HE LIKE GONE FOREVER? RIP I GUESS

the take on me scene was soooo goddamn funny

lucy comforting gru saved my life. that scene was actually well paced it wasn’t rushed but it didn’t go on longer than it needed to. a+ scene.

i knew from the trailers that agnes was gonna sell her unicorn but i didn’t know she was gonna look so SAD WHEN SHE DID IT THAT DESTROYED ME

uhhh skippin a few scenes bc whatever. stuff we know from trailers. OH OH but “YOU TOLD ME MY DAD DIED OF DISAPPOINTMENT WHEN I WAS BORN” WHAT THE FUUUUUCK I LAUGHED BUT GOD WHY IS SHE SO MEAN

lucy on the plane tryin to engage with the girls. i’m so sad pls just let her feel like a mom.

gru’s private part

the first scene in dru’s house reminded me that illumination’s lighting is always KILLER that scene was so beautifully lit

DRUUUU INTERACTING WITH THE GIRLS WAS HONESTLY SOOO CUTE?? esp the part with agnes it just felt like genuine kid dialogue. i love. and “SHE’S 12 SHE LOOKS 12 AND SHE WILL ALWAYS BE 12″ oh honey (but same)

OKAY the most bothered i was by the pacing in this movie was when gru was like “lucy can i get a fuckin uhhhh leave i feel like garb” and lucy was like “honey just deal”. that’s another part i read in the jr novel and thought would have more. emotion to it. like it didn’t need to be heavy or anything but i remember feeling really sad when i read gru say “i feel worse than i did when i came here” but in the movie it just kinda flew by? ESPECIALLY bc lucy was immediately like “well, he’s your brother just try to get along with him”. like, okay, you just had a scene of gru venting to lucy about feeling like a failure so you’d think if she found out meeting dru made gru feel worse she’d be like “oh no i’m sorry this isn’t what you were expecting and you feel even worse now” like she doesn’t need to say any of that but even just. a pause and a facial expression can say a lot. just a look of sympathy and then trying to cheer him up or be more optimistic like “well he is your brother and you were so excited to meet him and you only just met like you might eventually be glad you did this” that kinda thing. it was just sooo rushed it felt like nothing when it should’ve felt like Something bc lucy knows gru’s been feeling bad and just. a little sympathy would’ve been nice and still could’ve led to the same conclusion. but shit we gotta save time for the minions musical number i guess.

speaking of that i’m just gonna talk about that subplot in one bullet point. it was the one i cared about the least and had nothing to do with anything really. i’ll admit the singing part is kinda funny bc idk what it is but they always have good song choices for when the minions sing. like make em laugh in the minions movie and now modern major general like yeah those are minion songs yknow. and okay it is kinda funny when they’re in prison bc they just IMMEDIATELY show them and they’re like runnin the place. i figured there’d be some kinda transition but nope they get there and they rule the prison. also the first class/coach separation in the plane was funny but i have to wonder what dictates whether a minion ends in first class or coach. but yeah like i said i don’t really caaaaare and i’m salty over the minions leavin gru anyway so fuck em.

OH OH OH BUT THE PART WHERE MEL MISSES GRU AND IS REMEMBERING GOOD TIMES WITH HIM LITERALLY MADE ME CRY GRU IS SUCH AN ANGEL!!!!! THAT WAS ONE OF MY FAVE SCENES

okay rest of the movie. god this is so long i’m so sorry but i have SO MUCH TO SAY.

i don’t have much to say abt the scenes with gru and dru except i like them and i like their interactions. i didn’t think i’d like dru as much as i did tho i do see how people could find him annoying. i guess i’m just like. well i’m lucy and he’s part of my family so yes i love him.

“gettin my sea legs, matey” meeeeeee

SAD LITTLE BOOTS WAS SOOOO FUNNY

BAR NONE THE FUNNIEST AND JUST MOST CHARMING SCENE IN THE WHOLE MOVIE WAS GRU AND DRU PRETENDING TO BE EACH OTHER. everything about that scene gives me life. it was sooo genuine and natural like when they couldn’t keep it up and just burst out laughing. they’re adorable i love my husband and my brother-in-law they’re such children. i just love that it was gru’s idea bc you know when he was thinkin about twin stuff on the plane ride there he was like ‘omg what if we switched places and pretended to be each other to fool ppl omg that’s a twin thing’ but it was so obvious bc kids can get away with that but they’re in their fuckin 50s you fools.

THAT REMINDS ME steve carell was honestly so good in this movie. like he’s always good as gru but he was rly good as dru too like obviously they sounded similar but i was never watching it and thinking “oh this is steve carell talking to himself” like he voiced both characters well and obvs they had different personalities and that rly came through and just. i love you sexy grey hair steve carell.

scene with gru and agnes was so damn pure just. everything i want out of a scene with gru and agnes. thank u illumination for my life.

gonna talk abt the agnes subplot in one bullet point bc there’s not much to it. basically i love my daughter, she’s an angel, and i like that we just. have a goat now. also another animation highlight in the scene where she and edith are in the forest looking for the unicorn. that forest was gorgeous. and again, beautifully lit.

lucy defending margo REPLENISHED MY ELECTROLYTES

also when she was like “i gotta tell gru!” so precious omg i wish we could’ve seen her tell him about it that would’ve been so cute.

love the scene of gru and dru sneakin into balthzar’s lair. good stuff. I DIE WHEN DRU WAS FREAKIN OUT IN THE VENT AND GRU WAS LIKE “hey relax :) it’s gonna be fine :) i got your back” I WANTED TO SCREAM WHY IS GRU SO PERFECT

i don’t ship druthazar (sorry dm fandom) but i still leaned over to david when dru was sitting on balthzar’s bed and i whispered “that’s not the last time he was in balthzar’s bed” bc i‘m funny

AND THE BEST PART IS YOU’LL NEVER :) EVER >:( DO ANYTHING BEHIND MY BACK EVER AGAIN >:(( RIGHT HONEYBEAR? :)))

sometimes you want a unicorn. but you just get a goat.

i was ready to declare the part where lucy comes in just loudly singing and then goes “you’ve been a baaad boy gru” and smacks his face my favorite lucy scene in the whole movie but the it was balthazar disguised as lucy and i’ve never felt more betrayed

also how did balthazar perfectly mimic lucy’s voice? when he was disguised as the museum guy it was clearly trey parker doing another south park voice but WHATEVER

while i’m thinkin abt it trey parker was fine as balthazar i guess like he was funny but i used to watch a looot of south park so i would so often just her the south park in his voice and i was like Alright

THE CLIMAX OF THIS MOVIE MURDERED MY ASS!!!!! i looooove this movie’s climax it’s easily the best of the dm franchise. i never wanted to murder balthazar with my bare hands more than when he left the girls for dead and tried to kill an unconscious gru with a giant lazer. i was SHOOKETH. lucy jumpin across the giant bubble gum...balls or whatever to save the girls was the BEST SHIT. dru saving gru was so good i’m so proud of him...love my brother-in-law. and the dance fight with gru and balthazar SAVED!!! CINEMA!!! i was screamin oh my god..i know y’all know i love gru with everything i am but y’all he’s SO GOOD IN THE CLIMAX OF THIS MOVIE

as lucy wilde, i can confirm that after i ran up and hugged gru i was covering his face with red lipstick and also being like “balthazar’s dead right? like not just caught, fucking DEAD? RIGHT??” he either lied to assuage me or I Found A Way

AGNES SAYING “love you mom” TO LUCY AND LUCY BEING LIKE “i’m a mom!!” KILLED WHATEVER WAS LEFT OF MY SOUL!!!!!

tho tho tho i’m still UPSET that the girls call gru by his name and not dad...like you gonna call lucy mom WHEN U GONNA CALL GRU DAD I’M GASPING FOR AIR

lucy was very dtf at the end she was like gru say good night to your brother and let’s go FUCK (and then dru had to go and interrupt it smh)

i was like UMMMMM at first when watching the very last scene but then when i saw how gru and lucy reacted to it i was like okay i accept this. he better have just been staying temporarily at their house and going back to freedonia soon tho bc i don’t think lucy would like the idea of a supervillain living her house.

gru n lucy gettin ready to go in for the kill. love it. love them forever.

trey parker’s singing in hug me (the credits song) sounds too much like andy partridge of xtc and like 0 people reading this (if anyone’s still reading oh my god) are gonna know what i’m talking about but it makes it quite the Experience whenever i listen to it

speaking of this is the best soundtrack out of dm 1-3 i’ve been listening to it the whole time writing this

SO IN SUMMARY hi i’m lucy wilde, and my husband and daughters are absolutely everything to me. as a viewer balthazar is the most entertaining dm villain bar none (overkills excluded obvs), but as lucy wilde i hope he fucking dies for trying to kill my family. dru is a good brother-in-law and is also a gay icon. this movie came out in pride month for a reason. dru (a gay male) and lucy (a pan woman) are true mlm/wlw solidarity.

i’m fuckin.

i love.

#artie.txt #this is so...so long #i spent so long on this #i have many words #and they're mostly positive bc i'm EASY #dm #dm3

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