And maybe this is killing part of me But it ain't called love without a littlе tragedy

Thinking about when my last therapist asked me what I found physically attractive and she'd already been so "I can't help you until you're dating someone" and "so you think you're bisexual" at me (for context: I was 25 at this point and had been out for 13 years and I'd only mentioned that to her for context when talking about an ex-girlfriend) that I really didn't want to get into anything like "well actually the thing I find most attractive is when someone is incredibly passionate about something and incredibly skilled at that thing" or god forbid "honestly people become more attractive to me after I've got to know them well and I've developed a strong friendship with them", so I just gave a generic answer of "well, I like dark hair and dark eyes" (which is not untrue! that's a general trend and definitely things I find aesthetically attractive! but they're not... y'know... top of my list of attractive traits or in any way deal breakers) and before I could expand or even like say a third thing she gave me this really pitying look and went, "Oh, so the opposite of yourself 😔" and I just... I was in my pastel pink hair phase. It was very obviously a fucking chosen colour, and I had told her I liked dying my hair because she had commented on it before, so I don't know where the hell that psychonalysis was coming from. Frankly, I find people who dye their hair or enjoy changing things like hairstyle up frequently attractive because it's a common interest, and that aside, my natural hair colour isn't super dark, but I am brunette, which was obvious because my roots were showing. (As for eyes, I do have blue eyes, but they're not ice blue, my former housemate thought I had brown eyes for the first, like, four years that we knew each other so they're not the lightest shade in the world.)

I am going to be stuck on "oh, the opposite of yourself" as an "I've connected two dots" "you didn't connect shit" moment for the rest of my life. I don't know what the point of this post was, just like... my hair is dark violet at the moment and every time I'm doing it my brain goes "learning to love yourself 😌" or some shit, like it was such a stupid fucking moment, it lives rent free in my brain.

this is such a longshot but to hell with it, let's try anyway 🫡

i recently finished another rewatch of the anime steins;gate and i am craving some okabe/kurisu content. these idiots live rent free in my head and have been doing so since 2012 🧍 i have so many hcs and ideas and honestly id just love to talk to someone who adores the show as much as i do too 💛 but an rp would be an incredible bonus and im pretty confident playing either character! would love to do a canon continuation but can also explore other worldlines — that's the beauty of time travel shows ☀️🦋

facts abt me: im 25 (so please be 21+ when interacting!!) i have four cats and im autistic/adhd so my brain is constantly zooming 🏃 i am an adv lit writer but i prioritize quality over quantity. i love to make playlists and silly memes and aesthetic boards :') and im an insomniac operating on new zealand time so im pretty much available whenever 😔🙏

please only interact if serious about reaching out and getting in contact!! im honestly foaming at the mouth to do anything involving these two so if you can relate like/rb this post and ill be in touch!! 💛

,

it’s one of the toughest matchups i could think of!! i’ve debated this a Lot and my answer changes day to day but i think save rock & roll bc it ends the album on such a hopeful note and it’s linked to a lot of rlly good memories for me <3 also i’m a music nerd so the key change at the end like… fixed something in my brain the first time i heard it 😭 i was kinda dancing and when the key changed i like. jumped out of happiness and accidentally pulled my earbuds out lmaooo… a core memory for sure!! (even tho i had to rewind bc i missed a few seconds after that 😔)

what a catch gets points for being one of the most soul destroying songs Ever so i absolutely see where ur coming from! such a beautiful song and especially after the hiatus, knowing they made it through and came back 😭

also v unrelated and i’ll probably send another thing abt this when i’m less sleepy, but that patrick video has been living in my mind rent free lmao <3

- 🧋 anon

those are SUCH fair reasons to pick srar over what a catch like. having such a strong memory tied to a song makes it Difficult to ever Not love the song!! i also do think it is such a perfect way to close the album, and i'm weak to a key change too tbh dfhskfj depending on the day i feel like i could pick srar too honestly...

yesss god what a catch has so much more importance and weight post-hiatus, i think!! like. idk i think too much about it and it makes me soooo emotional just how much of a promise it was from pete to patrick and the band and the fans and like. tears my heart up Every Time!!

fkjdfhskj no literally same that patrick video. he is so. i would pay all the money in the world to be able to just sit quietly in the studio w him, watching him do his thing like. it would be so incredible!!! also im SO curious about the song playing in the trumpet clip lmao let me hear it fobbbbbbb