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ain-t-bovvered · 5 years

Text

15x02 commentary

bunch of tired and caffeinated Europeans ( plus a sleepy American) scream together, and then die and try to get on with their day ( lol AS IF)

Hello and welcome:

@purpleskiesandcherrypies (Nat)

@dean-winchesters-bacon (Kat)

@waywardbaby (Zee)

@ain-t-bovvered (Giulia)

Nat : ready?

Zee: Yes

Zee: No

Giulia: Yeah yeah YEAH

Nat : go

Giulia: GOD

Nat : NICE

Zee: Not jack dying again

Giulia: Can they stop making me see Jack dying again

Giulia: That must be a real tiny ass town tho

Nat : Ah, something's gonna happen

Zee: I read tiny ass and was trying to figure out what it meant

Zee: Really?

Giulia: The fuck is she doing

Nat : Ah Rob

Nat : Is that still in that town?

Zee: That ain’t rob bitch

Nat : Ah yeah

Giulia: There are ALWAYS people who don’t evacuate

Giulia: PRIORITIES

Nat : Why is she not at the school

Nat : Woo? Woo girls being stabbed and it sounds like this?

Zee: Because she dum

Nat : Who is this

Giulia: AH LOL

Giulia: spelling bee

Nat : An academic ghost

Giulia: thank you NAN

Zee: Nice

Giulia: The chains are already there

Zee: Louder Sam

Nat : lol Sammy

Nat : sHorTlY

Zee: Say it like you mean it sam

Giulia: Shut up

Zee: Cas’s “we're fucked” look

Nat : I'm not their favorite

Nat : snorts

D: So you were a dick to 'em in Hell, huh?

B: No, I did my job. It's Hell. It's not a day spa.

Giulia: well he’s not wrong

Zee: Crowley whiplash

Zee: Poor dean

D: Why are you helping?

Giulia: YEAH why

I told you, I like Hell the way it was. I'm a good soldier.

Can I direct you to Dean’s “surprised” eyebrows at the ‘ I’m a good soldier?’ I think that tell a lot.

Giulia: ESCAPE ATTEMPT

Nat : Dangerous ghosts

Nat : Touble T?

Zee: Jack the Ripper

Nat : Great

Giulia: OH GREAT COOL

Giulia: cool cool cool

Nat : How is Jack the Ripper in the US tho

Zee: Because that’s where the Winchester’s challenged Chuck Nat

Giulia: Idk man...americans likes to have everything

Nat : Claiming ghosts that are not theirs

Giulia: AND of course there must be the stupid humans

Nat : Ah, this reminds me of something

Giulia: Oh look a ghostmeeting

Zee: Claiming ghosts, raising hell. The hell business

Giulia: OH that’s Jack the ripper then

Nat : Apparently MYSTERY SOLVED

Giulia: Where’s the accent

Nat : He apparently adapts

Nat : Wow, that's a great idea to sneak in

Giulia: AH sneeky humans

Zee: WHY?

Giulia: Hope u get killed Stupid fucks

Nat : I can't get over the weird ghosts

Zee: Look at that close up

Giulia: you are so pretty Charles

C: I just think we need to tell the family something. I mean, we found his wife's body.

S: Cass, we will. When we can.

C: When we can?

he’s so done. lol

Nat : The squint of Cas eyes tho

Giulia: always

R: KNOCK KNOCK

Zee: THE QUEEN

R: Am I interrupting something juicy?

Zee: Samuel

R: Castiel ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

Giulia: I LOVE THEM

Nat : As if she doesn't want to help

Nat : SAMUEL NO

Giulia: Samuel nou

Zee: Them bow legs

Nat : Dean's hair

Giulia: That stare is so not normal Sam. Please get on with the program

Nat : I am not entirely happy with these ghosts, honestly

Giulia: Well The ripper is not that bad

Zee: Ketch

Giulia: KETCH

Nat : Ugh

Giulia: what’s that horrible suit tho

Nat : Dean's happy though. He just doesn't know how to show it

I know! he looks a bit happy lol.

but also

I mean...

Nat : Yeah, but that's about it

Giulia: Ketch looks tanned

Giulia: Oh COME ON, can we not

Zee: Asking for single malt whiskey in the middle of the apocalypse. What a queen

Nat : Eyefuck

Zee: Is this awkward or not?

Giulia: They gonna fuk

K: Jack?

B: Um no, I get that a lot

Nat : I get that a lot lol

Giulia: OH SHUT UP

Zee: Now I’m under jacks

Giulia: Oh does ketch knows him

Giulia: OH

Nat : Oh, he is a treat you just don't know it yet

Giulia: Yeah

Zee: What?

Giulia: OH

Nat : Is that Amara

Giulia: HELLO

Nat : Ah

Giulia: AAAH

Zee: WHAT THE FUCK?

Giulia: smite

Nat : I think it's probably the other way round

Nat : He's the darkness

Zee: Game of thrones ending ! Lol

Giulia: NO IT WAS NOT PRETTY GREAT FUCK OFF

Asshole: You said you'd keep us safe.

Zee: Take a deep breath Cas

Giulia: DON T TRY WITH CAS

Nat : The dimples of discontent

R: So, uh, tell me about Arthur Ketch.

Giulia: ROWENA FOCUS

Dean’s not really having it today lol

D: Rowena, we have ourselves a crisis on our hands, okay? Find yourself another boy toy.

Nat : Boy Toy

Giulia: BOY TOY

Zee: Don’t I ?

Giulia: AHAHAHA

Nat : hey

Giulia: no ok but she really don t

Nat : H E Y

Giulia: AWKWARD

Zee: Dropped the puck

Giulia: oh.......Are we doing this

Nat : Ah great to remind him Cas. Well done

Giulia: Yikes

C: I didn't tell you about Jack, and then after what happened with your mother...

Zee: Yikes

Zee: Shut up

Giulia: YIKES

C: You're angry

Nat : Dean bb

D: This mess... all the messes. It turns out that we're just hamsters running in a wheel our whole lives. What do we have to show for it, huh? Tell me you don't feel conned. God's been lying to you, Cass, forever. You bought into the biggest scam in history.

Giulia: HAMSTERS well he right

C: ou don't think I'm angry? After what Chuck did? After what he took from me?He killed Jack. But that doesn't mean it was all a lie

Zee: Mourning dad

Giulia: Oh no Cass

Giulia: Well he’s not wrong

D: really?

C: Chuck is all-knowing He knew the truth, he... he just kept it to himself.

Nat : Awe Cas

D: Well, now that his cover's blown, everything that we've done is for what? Nothing?

Zee: Dean is about to snap tho

C: Even if we didn't know that all of the challenges that we face were born of Chuck's machinations, how would we describe it all? We'd call it "life". Because that's precisely what life is. It's an obstacle course, and maybe Chuck designed the obstacles, but we ran our own race. We made our own moves. And mostly, we did well with that.

Giulia: Bb

Nat: Great speech

Giulia: I love it

D: Did we? I'll tell you what we do know. Nothing about our lives is real. Everything that we've lost, everything that we are is because of Chuck. So maybe you can stick your head back in the sand, maybe you can pretend that we actually had a choice. I can't.

Giulia: DEAN

Nat : I can see Demon!Dean a little

Giulia: dean is MAD

Giulia: M. A. D

Zee: You shut your mouth

C: Dean. You asked, "What about all of this is real?"

We are.

Zee: WE ARE

Nat : WE ARE

Giulia: WE ARE

Giulia: MY GOD

Nat : SOBA

Giulia: I HAVE CHILLS

Zee: Ok. I love him

Giulia: GREAT SPEECH

Giulia: *clapping *

I can’t believe that actually happened right in front of my salad

Nat : It's not really ME

Giulia: Oh ok

Nat : snorts

D: You guys didn't come up with a cool weapon for Him, did you?

K: No

K: So, um... Tell me about the witch.

Giulia: NO STOP THAT

Zee: Trouble. Ya think dean? You’re in a town filled with idiots

Giulia: im still in cas’ speech tbh

Zee: Focus

Giulia: IT WAS A GREAT SPEECH

Nat : So can we move away from ghosts in the next ep

Giulia: Yeah I’m already tired of them

Nat : I'm salty we waste two episodes on them

Giulia: what

Zee: What?

Giulia: OH

Giulia: OOOOH

Nat : AH

Zee: Aaaa

Giulia: KEVIIIIIN

Giulia: BB

Giulia: MY BABY

Nat : Hello smalls

Giulia: MY BEAUTIFUL STRESSED BB

Zee: Advanced placement

Giulia: wasn’t he in HEAVEN

Giulia: oh great

Giulia: BITCH

Nat : DEAN IS PISSED

Giulia: FUCK HIM

Nat : Dean? I try

Giulia: NO GOD

Giulia: FOCUS NAT

Zee: God’s a dick

Nat : GOD CAN SUCK MY DICK

Giulia: well Amara seems calm

Nat : Ah, that's the oriental room we saw once on IG

Nat : She's not

Zee: She really isn’t

Giulia: Oh look he wanna tap out

Giulia: AHAHAHAH HE ANNOYED HIS SISTER

Nat : It's not you. She knows

Zee: He’s buttering her up

Nat : I thought she was lil sis?

Giulia: Oh what if he needs her for his new project

Zee: The cogs are turning

Giulia: OH HE IS HURT

Nat : I hope that they won't fuck

Giulia: what

Giulia: HEY COME ON

Zee: Nat!! Ffs

Giulia: IT’S 8:30

Zee: It’s not a time thing Giuls

Nat : We are watching SPN at 8.30 what does that say about us.

Nat : We will be salty the whole da

Giulia: we like pain

B: I guess I just assumed you two pros woulda wrapped it up by now.

Nat : Whiny Kevin?

Nat : Shut up

Giulia: Typical millenial

Giulia: ...WHAT

Giulia: omg

Nat : No, it's actually Gen Z

Zee: What?

Giulia: NICE

Zee: Bitches focus

Giulia: but also

Giulia: ....I DON T LIKE THAT

Nat : Ah great

Nat : Like we all don't worry at all

Nat : So sick of ghosts UGH

Giulia: oh remember those scenes in the season trailer with dean being conflicted and sad with the colt?

Nat : U

Nat : G

Nat : H

Giulia: SNORTS

Zee: Yeah. Don’t !!

Nat : stop

Giulia: they all know Kevin Tran

Nat : I think it's universal that ghosts knows each other

Giulia: Sam and dean

Giulia: US

Giulia: Our chat is hell lol

Zee: Thanks

Ketch and Rowena flirting again

Giulia: I DON T CARE ABOUT THOSE TWO. UGH WHY IS THERE ORG CHEM

Nat : I AM CONFUSED

Zee: Is this gonna be Ketcena?

Giulia: HATE THAT. Hate all of that. So much

Nat : I swear if we are still stuck in the ghost town by ep 3 I'm gonna flip a fucking table

Giulia: Is this flirting

Zee: Dean is cockblocking for once

Nat : He knew

Giulia: he feels these things

Nat : Ah, they know each other

Giulia: WHY THEY ALL KNOW EACHOTHER

Also Rowena needs to revaluate her standards

Giulia: what is this

Zee: We’ve established that

Nat : Hey, don't insult Marry Poppins you fuck

Nat : Great

Giulia: ....

Nat : Have I mentioned that I hate ghosts

Giulia: Wow that was lame

Nat : What is this episode

Giulia: Ghosts

Nat : It's lame

Giulia: Why can he do that

Giulia: This is the last we see Kevin

Giulia: Just realized

Giulia: I don t wanna

Giulia: Awe Dean

Zee: Excuse me while I drool a bit

Nat : Meh

Zee: What?

Giulia: Of course

Zee: Oh fuck

Nat : I saw that he wasn't wearing the chain

Giulia: How they took it out tho

Giulia: GREAT

Nat : I'm so not into the episode

Giulia: yeah It s weak

Nat : Both of them were tbh

Giulia: WHY DO I HAVE ADS

Giulia: FUCK

Zee: Yah me too

Nat : This might be unpopular opinion

Giulia: well it’ll pick up

Nat : Idc

Zee: But is the ghost thing over?

Giulia: 🤷🏼‍♀

Nat : But it makes me mad that we waste 2 episodes

Giulia: Tiny smile

Giulia: KEVIN

Nat : The eyebrow

Giulia: IM SO ANGRY

Nat : Look at the eyebrow

Zee: Relax your forehead Sam

Giulia: SANGRY

Zee: Is that eyebrow stuck?

Giulia: can relate

Giulia: IMMA CRY

Nat : Shut up Belphy

Nat : LOVE YOU GUYS

Giulia: KEVIN BB

Giulia: LOVE U GUYS

Giulia: SOBS

Giulia: SOOOB

Giulia: I love you kevin

Giulia: OH NO

Zee: Oh fuck Oooooffff

Giulia: IS THIS THE FIRST OF THE GOODBYES?

Nat : I feel Amara Amara is my spirit animal

Giulia: You sing backup

Giulia: Oooooooh burn

bUT HEY , maybe Amara will be one of those rare females on spn to not die

Zee: I kinda like her now

Giulia: I’m done chuck

Zee: Petulant

Giulia: Petulant narcissist

Giulia: Oh can Amara seal his ass away

Giulia: AH SUCKS FOR U

Nat : We'll still be stuck in ghost town next ep aren't we

Zee: Ya think Rowena ?

Nat : Ugh eyes twitch

Giulia: Well it is the major problem

Giulia: TRAILER TIME

after

Nat : Yeah

Nat : GREAT

Giulia: ...

Giulia: OH NO

Giulia: NOPE

Giulia: NOOOPE

Giulia: NOPE

Giulia: SAM CRYING

Giulia: NO

Giulia: I HATE IT

Zee: WHAT WAS THAT?

Giulia: I HATE THIS

Giulia: FUCK OFF

Zee: Like

Giulia: NO

Zee: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?

Nat : I'm salty

Giulia: IM ALREADY CRYING

Giulia: Please, It’s too soon for Rowena come on

Giulia: Nat

Giulia: HARD NOPE

Zee: Fuck off

Giulia: HATE IT

Giulia: HATE IIIIIIIT Next episode is canceled

Zee: Like, get in the mood for next ep

Giulia: What next ep?

Zee: We both know we’re gonna be there

Giulia: The next one is 15x04

If you want to get tagged send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.

TAGS: @wayward-angelgirl @destiel-honeypie @mariekoukie6661 @dragontamerm @closetspngirl @rainflowermoon @mattiecat @bunnybaby121115 @aliaitee2 @jacks-word-of-the-day @4evamc @dammitsammy @legendary-destiel @winchesterprincessbride @destielhoneybee @castiellover20 @jacks-word-of-the-day @ravenhg @evvvissticante

#supernatural 15x02 #spn 15x02 #15x02 spoilers #15x02 commentary #spn commentary #raising hell #15x02 Raising Hell #spn gifs

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purplesurveys · 4 years

Text

647

Have you ever done a craft that you found on Pinterest? I’ve never gone on Pinterest for reasons other than looking for interior design ideas lmao, so no. I’m no good at crafts anyway so it’s not like looking at Pinterest will make me feel good or motivated. Do you get scrapbooking layout ideas from anywhere? I don’t do scrapbooking, but if I do start (and I’ve always wanted to), I’d definitely get some tips from the internet or from people I know who are artsy. What do you do to wipe off the dust from ordinary life? Drink. Are you content with mystery, or do you wish you knew everything? I wish I knew everything, no matter how bad the news may be. What do you do when someone irritates you on Facebook? Unfriend them, duh. I could still see them in real life anyway, but I can very much hate their presence online enough to unfriend/block them haha.

Are you judgmental? If I meet a person for the first time only after I’ve heard a couple of stuff about them, I might judge them for a bit yeah. Then I’ll brush it off first and see if they really are what I was told they’d be. Do you think your hair looks better natural or dyed? I’ve never had it dyed, so I wouldn’t know if it looks better. Do your parents disrespect you? My mom does; and she’s typically a disrespectful person. My dad’s pretty chill. Have you found that love covers over a multitude of sins? Sure. People just have to watch out and make sure love doesn’t reach such a point that it ends up becoming a cover-up for toxic behavior. What was the last Grand Opening you went to? Popeye’s HAHAHAHAHA. They opened their (second) first branch in the country around a year ago and we didn’t have classes that day, so we went. Do you have anything coming up tomorrow? No Monday classes for me, so the day would just consist of me doing schoolwork at home, or in a coffee shop, or whatever works for tomorrow. What's one thing that makes your stomach hurt? DAIRY. I’m having milk tea right now and it is a nightmare. But it tastes so good, so lactose town it is. Ever had a living nightmare? You mean the last 22 years of my life? Sure. Do you have a lot of haters? Idk, it’s possible but I don’t worry about that kinda stuff.

Do you think successful people always come with a pack of haters? Of course. People are alllllllllways envious. Do you have supernatural abilities? No. Do you kick yourself when you make mistakes? Do you say, "I wish I would have" a lot? Yeah I do this a lot. It drives my girlfriend nuts and she hates when I start on could have/should have rants, but it’s my thought process most days. Are you doing the most you can with your life? 'The most’ is probably pushing it. I know I can still do more like join contests, volunteer, be in more orgs, etc. but it doesn’t mean I’m unhappy where I am and with what I’ve done. I can still call myself satisfied, and I hope it means I’ve been doing something right. Do you let people walk on you? No. At least I don’t think so. Are you ok? Thanks for asking :’) I could be better, but at least I’m functioning and that’s better than being a vegetable in bed all day. Do you have a friend you miss right now? Yeah, I always miss Angela. Do you ever write snail mail to your friends? We don’t do that anymore dude. Do you make your life look better than it is on Facebook? Yeah. There’s like this quiet mutual understanding among people (at least in my generation) that Facebook is for impressing your relatives and showing how good of a life you have, and Twitter is where you air out your sadness and rants and all the mess in your personal life haha. Do you feel God's presence regularly? There is no presence to be felt. Do you experience chronic pain? Nope. Do you believe God loves you and is rooting for you? Don’t need anyone else other than my friends and myself to do both of those for me. Have you ever dreamt that you were falling? I’ve never dreamt it but I’d sometimes get that sensation when I would almost fall asleep. What would your dream career be? Lawyer. If I wasn’t such a fucking crybaby in arguments I think I’d survive law school just fine HAHA. Are you a daydreamer? Sure. Do you daydream so much that you wonder if there's anyone who doesn't? Not really. I just daydream when I’m bored. Do you ever just sit and daydream for awhile? ^ Again, only when I’m bored. Is the snow falling where you are right now? Snow has never fallen in the Philippines. What is your favorite part of nature? Mountains, and the spectacular views they can give. Do you wish you could be a world traveler? Sure. Do you wish you could live in another city for a year? I wish I could migrate to another country – that’s how much I want to get out of here. What city would you like to visit? I’m eyeing Bangkok for my next trip abroad if that’s ever going to happen :) What has been your favorite city that you've visited? Locally, Vigan or Sagada. Abroad... probably Bali. If you had kids, would you take them to Disney World? I’m definitely going to be that parent who takes my kids every year and lets them wear whatever costume they’d want. Have you ever stood in line to get a Disney character's autograph? No. Do you own a birthday crown? I had a tiara for my 7th birthday party, but I’m not sure if my mom was able to keep it. How long does it usually take your hair to dry? Do you dry it naturally or blow-dry it? I have it dry naturally because I get bored blow-drying it. It usually takes an hour or two. Do you straighten your hair? No. I have bad experiences with that because as a kid/teenager, my mom would force me to have my hair rebonded even if I never wanted to have it done to my hair; so these days, when someone asks if I prefer my hair to be straightened, I shudder and say no. Do you sleep with a teddy bear? No and I never did. I was never into stuffed toys. Would you consider yourself a free spirit? To an extent, I guess. I do enjoy being independent and trying out new things, but I always want people to be with me along the way. If I’m gonna travel the world, I need a travel buddy. If I’m gonna go hiking in Sagada, I’d feel better having a companion. If I’m gonna try worms or bugs for the first time, it’s always nicer having someone who’s just as daring when it comes to food. I’m basically a free spirit who never wants to feel lonely, haha. Do you need to clean out your closet? I need to refold some of my clothes, but otherwise I know where everything is. Do you watch YouTube videos regularly? Yeah, I watch at least one video a day. What's your favorite coffee shop? Starbucks will always be my first love for their ambience, but Coffee Bean is pretty great too. Is your Pinterest page cluttered? It’s not used at all. Do you want to start a collection? Yes, I always said I would start collecting all sorts of WWF/E memorabilia once I’m able to afford having a steadily-growing collection. My future house is definitely gonna have its own ~man cave~ except it’ll be for wrestling merch, and it’ll have its own TV and sound system too for when I want to hide from the world and just find solace in wrestling. Are you a role model? Would you consider yourself a good example? I’ve had people say they look up to me for certain traits, but this isn’t something I actively try to become. I have bad habits and vices of my own, so I definitely don’t endorse myself as a role model. But if I can help people in other aspects, then that’s more than alright with me. Are you a leader or a follower? Follower. I like being a leader whenever I can, but there’s too much pressure in being the leader all the time. Who's your favorite person? My girlfriend, durrr. Who have been your favorite American Idol contestants? Siobhan Magnus, Adam Lambert, and Pia Toscano. Did you used to name your Barbies? No. I never liked playing with Barbies either. I think I only ever got one Barbie doll as a present, and it’s because I always preferred playing with toys for boys given that I grew up with mostly male cousins. What unnatural hair color looks best on you? I’m not sure. I’ve wanted to dye my hair either red or green, though. Is your life boring? No. It’s certainly picked up in the last few months. Do you usually feel better around people or alone? I do great for both situations. It depends on what I need at a particular time. Is there a broken relationship in your life that you want to fix? There’s a broken relationship, but I have no desire to fix it. Do you ever think about Heaven? A part of me finds a level of solace in the idea of getting reunited with lost loved ones when I die, but I mostly think there’s no afterlife. Are you ready for Heaven yet? Are you afraid of where you're going to go? No. I’d like to think I’ll end up somewhere in the universe, and it’s enough to calm me down. Do you have a tree outside your window? Yes, but it’s dark and we have curtains so I can barely see the trees. Do you feel better now than you did last night? I wouldn’t say that, even though I’m feeling okay tonight. I was with Gabie last night, which automatically makes last night better. Is your sleep schedule messed up? It’s still a little bit distorted, yeah. But I’m not too worried about it because at least all my classes this sem start at 10 AM, which means I get to sleep in unlike last sem when I had 7 AM/8:30 AM classes :) Does your body have any problems with it? It gets tired during the day because I’d usually take naps in the afternoon, but it doesn’t affect me too badly. Are you doing ok spiritually? I don’t think about that aspect. Have you taken any huge risks lately? I had a long, blunt talk with Gab last night and it involved topics regarding our relationship that have long been denied and shelved finally acknowledged and let out in the open; and I think that in itself is a big step to take. Silence or songs? I can prefer either depending on my mood. Tea or coffee? Coffee. Books or movies? 10 year old me would say books. Today me would say movies. Do you ever watch your favorite movies from when you were a kid? Yes. I do a Toy Story rewatch at least once a year. ^If you were going to do that, what would you watch? Mostly Disney movies like Toy Story, Finding Nemo, The Game Plan, etc. Do you ignore rude people or do you call them out? Call them out. Do you have trouble staying organized? Yeah, but then again I’m messy-organized so even though I find it hard to maintain being organized, I still end up remember where everything is placed (most of the time). What has been your most favorite adventure? Walking around Bali and my family not knowing where the hell we were or where we were headed. What has been your greatest mistake? I hate questions like this. Are you happy with your life right now? I’m like 75% happy with it, which I’d say is a decently healthy amount. Do you take anything to make your feel better? No. Are your parents still together? Yes. What color socks do you have on? Currently barefoot. Are you under a blanket right now? Nope. It’d be nice to be that right now, though. Are you hopeful? Always.

#survey #surveys

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ts-2020-olympics · 4 years

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EPISODE 3 - “Am I Old?” - Sarah

So far Shosha and Yujo haven’t lost any challenges, if we keep winning until the swap i fear that the other tribes will target our people because we’re all still intact. Maybe it would be a good thing to maybe lose one? I dunno

ちくしょう 😉

FUCK the hosts for this how many hours can you put in challenge this early in the game, i'm literally fucking pissed, FUMIN love! i knew we were gonna lose from early on but i still put in the time and hours to distract myself from this bitch ass boy who curved me yesterday night, whatever. i'm just so exhausted like of the constant losing, the tribal council, ugh. i haven't been on a losing tribe like this in SO long. and i'm so.. over it. i can't stand losing and i can't stand that emma is immune right now because deciding who to vote off is going to be impossible and people are going to be coming for me so i'm like, probably most definitely gone or whatever. and that means i'm going to have to do the arena challenge and NOT have a day off which... ugh....... dont get me wrong i know that ORGs are time commitments but usually i win the premerge challenges so THIS IS NEW OKAy kdhfnsdkfndkfndf. i'm just annoyed and i'm so over my tribe... and i didn't find any advantages at the olympic village i finally remembered to search in. anyway i dont even wanna THINK about tribal rn so this is just me saying fuck this challenge and ughhh i'm so TIRED just so fatigued of everything, i'll like come back tmrw and strategize or something. *throws a rock at the cameraman* fuck this shit i'm out, give me the osake RIGHT! GOD DAMN! NOW! (alcohol for all you non duolingo-ers)

i'm kinda happy that bailey was evacuated from the game, she would have been voted out regardless and this gives our tribe better odds at survival. even if we had gone to tribal i would've been comfortable, but now i feel like it's better than i try to prove my value as a player by competing in the arena! kinda excited.

tribal three times in a row check! 😍✨💋 LMAO no one is wanting to actually talk to me about it so i’m hoping that i can still sway the votes in my favor but we’ll see! i think landen would defiantly do his best to help keep me from going, but it’s all a matter of who would we send instead. so! we’ll see! at least i can say i did my best

So, for starters, the past round went pretty much as expected. Kathy was the vote off from my tribe, and she lost at the arena, as well, past round I found nothing yet again at the village. Now, right now in terms of this round, my tribe didn't win immunity, but Bailey ended up getting medically evacuated due to getting three inactivity strikes, so the tribal got cancelled for my tribe, and Beck ended up volunteering to do the arena. So basically, just awaiting to search Olympic Village again, and hoping to goodness there is a tribe swap next round, since right now my tribe is just my alliance with Ben and Beck, which will make things rough come another loss with no swap.

yep worst case scenario happened. My tribe lost with me sitting out and Will, my one main ally, not showing up to the challenge at all!! I was hoping it could be an easy vote so i didn’t have to vote and I could get the advantage but now it seems like my tribe is ready to boot Will and if I want that advantage I need two of those other three to vote against each other! God this is gonna be hard...

I’m in a tough predicament here. I could either A. play it safe, agree with everyone to vote will or B. try to save my ally and my advantage at the same time by getting Sarah and Eve to vote out Nik, risking my whole game. Godddd I don’t know!! aaaagh!

it's 10am, tribal is in 10 hours, and i've had about 10 separate heart attacks throughout the morning. i don't know what to do tonight. i'm really struggling to figure out what's right. my heart says jacob, that's definitely where i'm leaning. juls is my closest ally at this point, and after the whole debacle with Billy, voting him out, then instantly starting to bond with him and all that, and apologizing, and him sticking by me even after I voted him out first, I would feel terrible voting for him again and I want us to prove to eachother we can trust eachother. but the fact he said juls' name.. if that's who he's going to go for, i simply can't prove to him i will vote with him. i'm tight with juls, she saved me even over emma, and i just really feel a bond with her. we're both the youngest in this cast, we both have lots in common, it really do feel like we're the same person at times. at the same time, my head tells me jacob is good in challenges, and will be ok in arena, but that i really don't need a 3rd person upset at me for going to the arena, and if Emma is still coming after me, she could probably use me coming for Jacob to her advantage, but I don't even know where she's voting or what she's thinking. i'm torn about this vote, and it's all the more annoying that if emma just hadn't fucked up at the last challenge, we wouldn't be here without someone to vote right now. we'd all be able to agree on emma or jacob probably, and it would just... it would still suck complete ass, but it wouldn't be as complicated as it is now. with a tribe as tiny as 5 people, going to tribal THREE times, with all the same 5 people.. it's just not something we can afford. our tribe is being torn apart and... whew, i just need the swap. give it to me rn. as of now, i'm thinking i'm going to vote jacob, and i hope i can get billy on board for that and take his mind off juls. that's where my head is at right now... tribal is making me sick to my stomach

What the f does I stan you even mean? Am I old? And I no longer hip and down with the lingo? Bogus, man...

Our first tribal is tonight... I hate to say it, but I'm voting for Will. Nobody has heard from him in days, or for the last challenge, and tonight will be a second strike if he doesn't come back for tribal. WILL I'M SORRY. I definitely would not have voted him otherwise, he did great on the other challenges and is a great personality to have around. Come back for the next season Will..

I am the swing vote again lol Juls got blamed for messing up last vote by Emma and Billy, which considering Juls is beloved by everyone, PERFECT But now since we lost I need to pick a side, Landen and Juls or Emma and Billy. I like Emma, Billy sketches me out. Landen is the perfect meat shield for eternity. He's a bit of a blabbermouth. I watched the tapes of the live tribal, he sold me out unknowingly in front of Billy. How am I supposed to both sides these people now!? I could get sold onto a Landen vote, but that's not being sold, so WELL, who do I screw over. I feel so bad voting out Juls, but that's a reason to vote her out too, gah. GAH. Do I pick a side and lowkey goat, or do I make my control of the tribe forefront (but not evident because everyone hates each other) Time will tell. 1 Hour until tribal, and I have no idea what to do. inb4 voted out

why the FUCK does emma have immunity? she's literally so useless and does nothing in challenges... and the fact she already turned on juls, this quick, over practically nothing? im sick to my stomach, love. i know i said that already, but you know what? I must have the flu, because my nausea is neverending with this tribe and our constant spins at tribal council. as emma once said, we're basically taking turns sending people to the hellish arena. but the twist is so complex because you can't send someone you like there, because there IS always the very real chance that they lose the challenge. going there could be a good risk if you're smart with it, but it could be a risk that puts your entire game in jeopardy and i'm a KNOWN safe player when it comes to game mechanics ^_^ the only risks i take are in emotional labor! speaking of, myself and juls have both been working very hard to keep her safe from billy and emma's focused target on her, but i don't see it happening.. Billy and em seem to be tight now and it seems like they've convinced jacob to take out juls. The really horrible thing about all this, is that if i want to save juls.... i'm likely going to have to vote billy. and that is going to be aching, because i really like the guy, and i was being 100% honest and genuine with him saying i wanted to be on his side, to prove to him i have his trust and that i will be loyal to him and want to work with him til the endgame and be his ally. but if he's going to go against juls and i have to choose between the two of them..... i mean, i can't choose billy. it would be bad. so there's 30 minutes left and i don't have a clear idea of what's happening yet and any choice i make will permanently damage a tight connection that I thought I had heading into the later game. I guess in good news, Sammy, Caeleb, and a new friend, Jordan, ALL messaged me saying good luck at tribal, and talking to me a bit about it, saying they hope I'm safe. Forming those cross tribal bonds could be crucial in surviving the next stage of the game, which, god please, is happening VERY soon... *i bind myself to the cross* Give me strength to get through this, Japan. Onegaishimasu.

So far the game is makin me p sad, I’m super tired of going to tribal and having to send people to arena. And that Japanese challenge was so damn frustrating

so tribal last night.... i mean, uh, i guess my power, huh? lmao........... MESS!!! IM A MESS MY GAME IS A MESS THIS WHOLE DAMN THING IS A MESS. Someone get me a MOP rn because Sonkei-Matsing tribe is STRUGGLING and it's all EMMA'S FAULT!!!!! On the other hand, I'm very grateful Emma is an idiot, because Billy got to be safe!!! So let me explain what happened in that bonkers tribal council, from MY perspective... When I heard that my closest ally Juls had her name coming up, i was like, oh HELL. NO. So I put in the WORK to get Jacob and Billy to vote for eachother. Don't get me wrong, Juls worked hella hard on this too, she is a bad ass bitch and she deserves credit. But I do believe I was a major factor in swaying their votes as well as I'd built pretty close relationships with each of them in terms of strategy. But with Billy, that relationship wasn't a tight trusting one, more of a, please, I like you a lot, let me prove to you that I can be trusted and we can work together. Let us prove that to eachother. But here's how it happened. Even though Jacob and Billy DID vote for eachother... NEITHER OF THEM TOLD ME THEY WERE VOTING FOR EACH-OTHER. BILLY LED ME TO BELIEVE HE WAS VOTING JULS THE WHOLEEEEE TIME. And initially, I was fine with it, and i was STILL going to vote Jacob off with Juls!! Thinking there was nothing I could do and she would go 3-2. But then, 5 minutes into tribal, you'll see me furiously typing... Because Jacob FINALLY told me he was going to vote for Billy (and that's on Whispering!!! #LiveTribal!!) So from my perspective.... Billy and Emma are voting Juls. Juls is voting Jacob. Jacob is voting Billy. It's 2-1-1... and if I vote for Jacob, then Jacob and Juls can't vote, and Billy and Emma have the majority to send Juls out, saving Jacob on the revote. BUT if I vote for Billy, then Billy and Juls can't vote, and now me and Jacob have the majority over Emma. That was the thought process behind my initial vote for Billy. LITTLE DID I KNOW BILLY ACTUALLY WAS VOTING WITH ME AND NOW I FEEL HORRIBLE FOR VOTING FOR HIM AND I JUST WANT TO MAKE IT UP TO HIM BUT HE DIDN'T TEXT ME WHEN HE GOT OFF AND UGH, I NEED TO MAKE THIS RIGHT!!!! Emotional labor is the most annoying thing, and I'm really bad it. I'm terrible at apologizing and owning up to things, maybe that's why I just let my friendships fall apart in real life instead of doing the actual work to save them once a problem happens. because emotional labor is fucking annoying, exhausting, and stressful! I don't got time for it! But now, I need to have time for it, because our tribes are FIVE PEOPLE strong, and at the next tribal council, if I don't get my relationship with Billy in check, I WILL be gone. It is his vote that I need to help make sure Emma's psycho ass goes home, and if he, Jacob, and Emma all think they're on the bottom... Yikes. I hope Billy understands that I was absolutely disgusted it came down to him or Juls and I thought I was doing everything I could to save an ally.. I even swayed Juls to help save him with me, when she felt uncomfortable with him. He totally screwed up by like... not telling me he was voting with me, he said in tribal people just need to be real with where they're voting, and I agree! I wish he had just followed his own advice with me, because he would still be here right now. But his screw up does not at all compare to Emma... what the FUCK was she thinking, self-voting like that...? Like, HELLO? She throws out Juls' name all round, for I don't even know WHAT reason, since they were supposedly close, but it's implied she throws out Juls' name for getting 4 crowns on the challenge... Um, YOU STUPID BITCH YOU LITERALLY ONLY GOT ONE MORE CROWN THAN HER AND BEFORE THAT DID NOTHING ON THE SLIDE PUZZLE CHALLENGE OR THE TRIBE CHANT, DESPITE US KNOWING YOU CAN PUT IN THE TIME WHEN YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT IN THE ARENA :) Headass.... Then, after doing that all round, she SELF-VOTES??? WITH IMMUNITY AROUND HER NECK??? Girl you MUST be crazy, cus this is psychotic. Headass, deadass, she is gone the next time we lose tribal, which, lbr, is probably next time because we're LIT RALLY matsing. at least caeleb thinks i'm denise though. i feel like i have the same amount of wrinkles as her, after the stress of this game like 3 rounds in. imagine how tired i am.

Round 3's over! That's fun, innit? Glad we got rid of some dead weight in Bailey. As for friendships and alliances, I'm still slightly on edge about Darcy - I trust Beck over him. Got acquainted with Karen - they seem nice, but I'll keep an eye on them, too. Other than that, Nicole and Tommy are the people I'm mainly corresponding with. Seems like fun! :) Here's to a fun Round 4!

Okay so we won this round which is fun! Tommy went to the arena which gives me, Karen and Kevin a good chance to bond because Stoner just isn’t paying attention ever. I wonder if he has even made a confessional. Anyway, I’m going to be real annoyed if we lose and he whips out an idol. Also going to be mad if after this round there’s a swap and I’m swapfucked. I don’t think it really COULD happen to me though, because I’ve talked to at least one newbie on each of the tribes. Unless I’m stuck with Nik, Emma and Billy who have no interest in speaking to me, I think I’ll be fine. Speaking of newbies, I find myself talking to Ben a lot but I’m under the impression he talks to a lot of people. He reminds me of a lot of friendly pure men in this community like Joey, just very social and very nice! The only thing is sometimes he will say something in a conversation and I don’t necessarily know where to go with it. For example right now he’s having a full conversation with me in the village chat about pizza. I don’t know what to do with this and rather not be so vocal in the village chat. While the other newbies are increasingly hard to talk to, and sitting around all day waiting for the arena stuff is boring, Ben is a very nice person to talk to but I just wish we would talk like...about the game not what I’m eating. When it comes down to it I want to know I have an ally or two to bring to the end that might offset my immediate threat of being a winner, but not give them so much power that they win over jury votes. He seems to be showing his social side and not giving me any game info at the same time, which I have to look out for. All of the other newbies I’ve spoken to have talked game. He’s either playing a really good game by doing this or a really transparent one, I can’t tell yet. We will have to see!

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Last night proved something that I’ve been wondering about Landen for a while. He truly is a snake. I unintentionally made a really good move in keeping it mysterious on who I was voting. In order to make the vote go his way and to keep Juls, he instead changed the vote to ME and got Jacob to do the same. Sneaky mother fucker 😋 thank god Juls stayed the same though. I know for an absolute fact now that I won’t be able to trust him. As for Jacob, I do hope he comes back, because now that I know where the tribe stands I know I can get him on my side.

I don't know if I ever had such a frustrating round for challenges first duolingo and now the arena I was in the lead in front of everyone until the last clue and I lost it all I didn't get a medal. I'm so pissed, you really don't wanna @ me anytime soon because I'm at the point where I wanna go off on someone.

Love the tribe, so happy we 5-0d the last tribal!! it was a cute moment!! hehe, we seem to be very together as a unit

So Will’s gone, well he’s at the arena but i think he died so he’s probably out for good. Now that he’s out that leaves me on the bottom of my tribe as the next to go, my only hope is getting as close to sarah as I can and crossing my fingers for a swap! Due to that triple tribal I think it’s going to happen next... hopefully!

Ughh i keep forgetting to make confessionals until right before the round ends so im always like oh shit and then dont really know what im gonna talk about so its not good. hows things in the life of jordan pines? great thanks for asking, while i still feel on the bottom of my tirbe i definitly see a swap coming soon which i think depending on how it goes would be pretty good for me. Id ideally like to stay with most of the people ive been with plus new ones, becuse i think im seen as like an expendable numebr to caeleb and Jacob. I want them to keep thinking of me like this while I go out and start forming stronger relationships, keep bringing in those jordan pines minions, i got my sights set on billy right now, i like him but he makes me look as humble as they come and ive i could definitly turn him into a goat for me with the right coaxing. Im hoping will survives the arena cause hes for sure a number for me, but hes also a lil innactive so maybe he peaced. Im starting to build relationships with Landen who I like. I havent even looked at the all winners tribe holy shit. Karen and Stoner are gonna be my biggest obstacles as they dont necesarily love me. Im gonna try to work with Nicole for a bit if i can tbh. Thats really all im feeling right now. I think best cast scenario is people use me as a number and carry me just a little too far that I can turn shit around and fuck em over. It's definitely gonna be an uphill climb to the finish line, but the only way to do it is go step by step.

I feel like I am in a great position on my tribe! I trust Sarah and Eve a lot. Pete says he has my back so we can only hope that in the case of another tribal council, I will be safe! I’m still going to work my ass off and play my ass off to stay safe and not have to go to another tribal! This game is long and hard and I’m trying to see big picture. And within that big picture is a flashing sign that’s telling me there’s a tribe swap soon! Hopefully I’ll be able to work some magic and avoid being on a tribe with individuals that don’t like me. But overall I’m feeling pretty good after the last tribal!

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#zestypowerfuluniqueflavorfulhealthy #confessionals

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essaysbyciara · 5 years

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Thy Neighbor (Chapters 7 + 8)

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapters 5+6]

I gave up Tumblr for Lent so I figured I’d drop two chapters at a time to make up for only posting on Sundays. As always, message me if you would to be added to the tag list.

School and work meant nothing to Ciara once Tuesday came around. She stared at her clock hoping that time would speed up, skipping the gym so she could buy all the perfect ingredients for tonight. Her menu of red beans and rice, plantain and baked chicken was perfect. She bought her favorite wine in case Trevante needed to unwind.

As the smell of dinner enveloped the room, she mulled over if she needed to put on a different outfit. Her grey hoodie and black workout pants were perfect but did she need to put on a lip? Fill in her eyebrows? She gathers herself and realizes that this wasn't a date -- it was a lightweight Bible Study. She puts on her favorite Ella mix and awaits Trevante’s arrival.

Trevante can smell the food from the hallway as he walked past her door to drop off his things inside of his apartment. As he took a quick shower and changed clothes, he put on a grey hoodie and black basketball shorts. He grabs his laptop and notepad and heads over to Ciara’s.

“Hey!” Ciara’s braids swing as she opens her door. She laughs to herself about their matching outfits. “Come on in.”

“Thanks. Yo, that smells incredible.”

“I hope it’s good. I mean, I know it’s good. You know… you’ll like it I’m sure. Plates are in the cabinet to the right. Help yourself.”

Ciara pours her a glass of Riesling and pops a plaintain into her mouth. She’s quite too nervous to eat but knew that she couldn’t resist. As Trevante sits at her table, he marvels at the Ella Fitzgerald mix in the background.

“You like Ella?”

“You know, I do. I play the Spotify playlist sometimes to switch things up. I like it.”

“I love jazz, man. It’s great.”

Ciara watches as Trevante blesses his food. He opens his eyes to see that she’s halfway through her plate.

“What?” She asked. “What’s up?”

“I thought all of you Christians blessed your food.”

“You trying to be funny, Trevante?”

“Nah, nah. I mean… yeah.”

Ciara and Trevante both laugh as they devour their food. Trevante’s silence was all she needed to know that it was good. As they pull away from the dining table and into the living room, Trevante can’t help by stare at all of her books.

“Theology, huh?”

“Yeah. I’m going for Masters in Theological Studies.”

“I knew you were the right person to help me out.”

Ciara tries to contain her smile but can’t. She felt affirmed in a way about her passion that she never received. When she told her Mom that she wanted to pursue an academic career in religion, her Mom laughed her off. She thought her Christianity was a phase and that in due time, she’s forget all about this “moment in her life” But Ciara was committed to know about her faith. What made her tick and why she made mistakes and why she was so thankful for grace.

After Y’lan left, she fell into one of her darkness points. She’d sit in her apartment for days as a time, friends coming by and do wellness checks on her. Her depression deepened as the seasons changed, sleeping all day and waking all hours of the night. The Rahmeeks, Ezekiels and Chads found her bed but it wasn’t enough. She wanted to be left alone and alone is always how she found herself.

When she missed a week of classes, her professor reached out to her. As Ciara poured her heart out in an email, she felt relieved to know that she wasn’t alone. Her professor recommended a women’s group that could help her find peace in community. They became more than that, they became family. They’d braid Ciara’s hair when she wasn’t up to taking care of it. They fed her meals when she was too weak to go to the grocery store. They made her laugh with stories of terrible dates. They’d let her cry when something would trigger her about Y’lan.

They threw her a party when she finished on the Dean’s List that year.

“Okay, so I did some research on Proverbs. They do some great stuff.”

“I thought so too. I’m trying to figure out how to best market them though to communities who aren’t Christian too.”

“No, I totally get that. But I think you need to stick with that as their selling point. The worst thing you can do is pressure wash the faith off of an organization. That faith tag gives them some merit.”

“Yo. You wanna go into marketing?”

Trevante and Ciara laugh as she pours herself another glass.

“No, no, no. As someone who works for one, I get how hard it is.”

“Word? Who do you work for?”

“Protestant Placements. We place kids in churches and Christ-based orgs to gain experience and college or seminary credit. It’s pretty cool.”

“Again. You are perfect for this.”

Every ounce of approval makes Ciara’s heart palpitate.

“Okay, so… the book of Proverbs is like a book of instruction. It gives you the call to live right, practice grace, care for the poor, etc. You could pull out certain Proverbs to highlight certain causes they do.”

Trevante races to open up his spreadsheet.

“So like Proverbs 22:9. You could use that for their food program. You know what I mean?”

As Ciara’s trails off, Trevante starts to stare at her. He’s impressed by her knowledge and commitment. Especially to her commitment to help him. He flashes back to weeks ago when Ciara came to his aid in a moment when others would have left him alone. He remembered that she caressed his head and told him that everything was going to be okay. He remembered when she made him a cup of coffee and affirmed his hurt for the loss of his father. He remember when she told him “I got you.” and I meant it. Twice.

All of the women he ever dated never cared enough to know how he was feeling. They only wanted to have sex with him. Rather that was all he wanted. He never gave them a chance to find out. He wondered what it could be like to have sex with someone that he actually cared about and cared about him. Someone who would make him dinner and help him with work.

As he slowly drifts into another dimension, Ciara catches Trevante.

“Is this too much or…”

“No, no. This is perfect. This is great stuff. You got another glass of Riesling?”

“Of course. I got you.”

That phrase again. And she always delivered.

“You need to drink to get through this, huh?” Ciara slightly laughs as she passes Trevante his glass. He pauses before he takes a sip.

“So why did you help me other day?”

Ciara takes a longer sip before she answers. The right answer is that she saw someone in need. The wrong answer is that her fine neighbor needed help and she felt that this would be her chance to get in good with him. While she knew that wasn’t true, she wanted Trevante to know that wasn’t the truth either. And herself.

“I just saw you in pain so I figured to help. I wouldn’t want to be left like that. And when you said your Dad, I knew it was meant for me to be there.”

“What do you mean by that?” Trevante says quizzically.

“I’m a believer that you go through things to help others. As much as I still don’t understand why it had to be that, I know that God set me up to be in a place where if I ever ran across someone who needed my help, I would be able to do it. And stand firm as I did it.”

Trevante felt that answer. He was happy that it was her in that moment and not one of his late night dalliances. It was in the space of genuine care. He never felt that before.

“So yeah, that’s why.”

“Wow. Thanks, man.”

“Of course. I hope all of this helped you.”

“It did. It’ll give me a day to draft something. I really appreciate it.”

Ciara and Trevante get up from the floor to give each other a hug. As he embraces her, she rest her head on his chest, feeling his heartbeat slowly rises. They start to beat on the same syncopation. It catches her off guard. Him too. He doesn’t want to let her go. That was a new feeling.

Time slowed down for the both of them. That last person to make her feel this way was Y’lan. They’d hug longer to squandered any other thoughts they have in mind. It was their cheat code. She felt super warm and cozy. She didn’t want to let go. That was a missed feeling.

They both release with reluctance. Ciara grabs the glasses and places them into the sink. Trevante quickly grabs his things and heads to the door.

As Ciara starts to wash dishes, she hears Trevante leave. she falls to the ground, exhaling rapidly. As she texts Mahalia, she receives a text from Trevante.

Can I call you?

CHAPTER EIGHT

That phone call was two hours and 36 minutes. Trevante never been on phone that long since high school. As the hours ticked and his body grew tired, he didn’t want to get off of the phone.

“So tell me about your Dad?”

Trevante tells Ciara the entire story. The baseball dreams, the war, the PTSD, the drugs, the death. He opens up about college and his fears of living his family. He told her why he loved marketing and why he had to get to the gym at 5 AM. It was a lesson he learned from his father.

“Trevante. It’s like one in the morning. I think you need to get some sleep if you wanna make that time.”

“Ughhhh. Okay. I don’t wanna get off the phone though.”

Ciara couldn’t contain her giggle.

“That was cute.”

“Shut up. Look, I ain’t going to be one that messes up your schedule. Even though you sometimes mess up mine. “

“What you mean?”

Ciara didn’t want to blow up his spot about the soundtrack to her late nights. About the tapping of the headboard and the orgasmic screams coming from his bedroom. But there may not ever be a good time like this, she figured to go for it.

“You know I can hear you, right?”

Trevante pauses and then remembers. He starts to feel super embarrassed. Although he was proud of his work, he didn’t realize that Ciara’s bedroom was next door.

“Oh wow, my bad. I’m sorry.”

“I mean, somebody gotta get some around here. I’m glad it’s you. I can’t knock the hustle.”

Trevante wanted to know what Ciara meant by that. Was he wrong to ask? After pouring out his heart to her, he decides to go for it.

“I mean… you just threw me a softball. Are you...?”

Ciara wants to be offended but can’t. She knew the risk of letting him know that his trysts pissed her off. But also made her zone out at the possibility of her being at the receiving end.

“I practice celibacy, Trevante. Yes.”

“Hmmph. Wow. Okay. Respect.”

“That’s it? Dudes usually have a lot more to say after that.”

“Like what?”

“Like ‘would you break that for me?’ or “you masturbate though right?’ or ‘get with me and I’ll change your mind.’ and my personal favorite ‘we gonna get married anyway so let’s just test drive this shit.”

Trevante’s large frame curled over from laughter. He never tried those lines before and is kind of shocked that he hadn’t.

“Yo, dudes are trash. I’m sorry.” Trevante’s laughter fails to be contained. Ciara starts to laugh too.

“But yo Trevante it is getting late. I should be getting some sleep too.”

“Do you have to?”

Ciara doesn’t want to say yes but she knows she has to. She had no idea that her night would end with talking to Trevante for hours, laughing about life and getting close. Maybe her dream wasn’t too far off.

“Yes. I’ve been doing good about getting to class on time.”

“You wouldn’t break that for me?”

Trevante knew what he was doing with that question. And so did Ciara. And so did certain parts of her body. His deep voice and underlying sincerity sent her mind in a place that it shouldn’t have. To headboards. To orgasms. To breakfast in the morning.

“Wow, Tre. Good-fucking-night.”

Trevante lets out a hearty laugh. “Goodnight.”

As Ciara gets up to grab a glass of water, she knocks on her bedroom wall. Seconds later, she receives a text.

Yo. You weren’t kidding.

Taglist: @blackpinup22

#trevante rhodes x fanfiction #trevante rhodes #y'lan noel #fanfic #thy neighbor

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brownmatilda-universe-blog · 5 years

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Fuck You

Hey God.

Fuck you. I’ve tired to do things your way. I’ve tried to have faith. I’ve tried to love out lout. You suck with you vague parables and Jesus. I have no fucking idea what the fuck I’m supposed to do to with my life.

I left J and got divorced because I saw no other way out of my misery. I fucking went to law school, for fuck’s sake. I am over $200,000 in debt from that fucking folly. Missed the bar by two fucking points. Well done, fuck face.

I have tried to find my way. I started a nonprofit and it’s going well now that I have nothing to do with it. I have tried to turn my abuse into something positive but fuck no. No one wants to learn how to avoid sexual abuse. They’d just rather let teacher fuck students. It’s so much easier once the asshole is caught instead of actually putting in the fucking effort to try and stop it.

And now, I’ve interviewed for two jobs which I haven’t gotten and have another interview for a job I don’t think I’m qualified to do. How fucking hilarious.

The law of attraction- put out what you want back. I don’t want to be fucking poor anymore. I don’t want my bills to be paid late anymore. I want to be able to buy new fucking clothes from some place other than fucking Walmart. I want some relief. I’m tired of having to decide if I’m going to buy toilet paper, human food, dog food, or dog medicine. I’m fucking tired of this shit.

What am I doing wrong? What am I being punished for? Am I too arrogant? Should I just get a job at Wendy’s?? Nothing screams success like a fucking law degree and working at fucking Wendy’s.

Things I want to do with money: Pay my fucking bills on time. Give some money to causes I believe in like Glennon Doyle’s org. Shit. I don’t have enough money to donate to the fucking nonprofit I fucking founded. I want to help people who have little to nothing. Ha! I have little to nothing.

I want to help lessen the load on Kevin. I thought that getting a fucking law degree would help with that and mean something. It means not a goddamn fucking thing.

Thanks. Thanks for no fucking help in getting out of thie fucking hole. Is this what I have to face the rest of my fucking life?? Great. From shit I come, and in shit I live the rest of my fucking life.

You suck, God. You fucking goddamn suck.

#god #religion #lost #lostsoul

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survivor-tierradelfuego · 4 years

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Ep. 8: “The leftovers. The unchosen ones. The losers.” - Najwah

Cody A.

https://youtu.be/OSh0mvYBSwo

James Hayden

We just got back from tribal and Ryan was blindsided 3-1. I feel bad for the guy because he had no idea this was going to happen, but that' Survivor for you. I thought there'd be a merge at 13, but Jay's questions at tribal put some doubt in my mind. If it's not a merge, then I think I'm an ok spot if my tribe has to go back to tribal. I'm just praying to the Survivor ORG gods for a merge today or tomorrow.

Cody A.

https://youtu.be/sg4qe6MUjJU

James Hayden

https://youtu.be/oGcQdHpBzhY

Zack M

i don't know how they did it but let's take a moment to shout out james and najwah making it through tribal! no idol needed. im so proud of them. i feel like james will gladly come back to our original alliance once we merge but najwah's commentary always leaves me feeling uneasy. no offense but like do you want to play with anyone, najwah? lol. you have to somewhat trust someone at some point in this game. i would love to work with najwah for as long as possible if she is still around after the merge but unfortunately all of the comments that have been made throughout the game will keep me from promising her anything longterm out of fear that she will run around like a crazy person at merge. also, i believe that she will be the first person to mention my name from hanuha in hopes of it becoming a big move that she could put on her resume. maola doesn't know me yet. i guess they could see me as a threat because of being picked as a captain but like i don't consider maddison a threat. lol. pedro and kalle seem to want revenge. i think it would be fun to get her out first at merge. i'm just rambling now. i'm hungry. we got the new challenge. it's some mini online games or something like that. idk. i'm not a gamer so i was like i have therapy and can't do this bye. i wonder if they think i'm making up my therapy sometimes but like if you guys have ever questioned it i promise i'm not. i have it monday, wednesday, and fridays lol. anyways, cody pedro and kalle are playing. i really only trust me and ben so like fml. hopefully pedro and kalle understand that they are playing for their lives and we win again. fingers crossed. ok i'm going to get chicken tenders. bye.

James Hayden

Things post tribal did not go according to plan. I would've put money on us merging tonight, but instead we have another tribe challenge. There's a small part of me that thinks Edge of Extinction is play in this season. After this challenge, we will be down to 12 people and seasons post 30 that have a 20 person cast merge at 13. I think there's a chance we do merge at 13, but the 13th person is the Edge returnee.

As far as this challenge is concerned, video games aren't my strong point. I'm not a gamer, but these games are pretty straight forward. If we have to go back to tribal I'm voting Amy. Voting out Najwah would hurt my game because it would show the rest of Hanuha that I'm not #Hanuhastrong and it would tie us back up at 6 original Hanuha and 6 original Maola. Voting out Amy gives us a 7-5 advantage heading into a potential merge, shows I'm #Hanuhastrong, and weakens Maddison who I think was the ringleader of Maola 1.0.

Najwah

Last night's tribal was interesting and actually the hardest tribal council. Ryan started a group with James and I 7 minutes after Palena was formed which already made us weary of him. He then tried to blindside me and made me believe he's blindsiding Amy and asked me about James and his previous alliance and it was just a mess. He's an awesome person and great team player but it was just too much scrambling and we all feared he'd flip flop throughout the game, which is dangerous. I'm trying not to use this space as therapy sessions lmao so I'll keep it short. Uhm, I think i have a good thing going with Amy and James. I just really hope we win this challenge, or rather, don't come last so that I can work with them going forward. Amy let me know she has a steal a vote and I told her about my fake idol and we'd like to work together. I really like these two people. A LOT. I lied in tribal when I said I didn't want to keep things Hanúha strong going forward. I can't believe I have to lie and blindside now lmao its becoming HECTIC. I'm really hoping we did enough to at least place second in this challenge. 🤞🏽🤞🏽

Olivia A

I’m doing so bad at all of these games rn and I feel so bad bc I asked specifically to not sit out of this challenge. I play little phone games and stuff literally all the time and am really good at them and for some reason am just doing so so bad today. If we lose then it’s probably my fault but also my alliance of 3 is really solid rn so I’m not actually worried about getting voted off. I still feel so bad I hate this so much.

Cody A.

https://youtu.be/8QZTwYzVqVI

Pedro A

if tomorrow is the merge IMMM GONNA DIEEEEE...we won once again..cause we the baddest.....honestly how am i still alive?...LIKE HOW??....chilllleeee

Olivia A.

Okay woah I’m so happy about this win I was so nervous. I feel like we’re in a really good place going into the merge I’m excited :)

Pedro A

i was about to write my pled for help to the 3 hanuha original members..so they could keep me over kalle...but now who cares...i will throw anyone hunder the bus ....to get to that final

Cody A.

Coming into this game being the competitor that I am, I never imagined even entertaining the idea of throwing a challenge.... BUT when Ben came to me with the idea of making a big move on Zack, I’d be lying If I said I didn’t think about it.. That being said however, I didn’t throw it, but I also did not try as hard as I could have.... I’m very surprised we are not talking to Jay at tribal right now.. Moving forward though, we need Zack.. I need Zack.. If we are merging tonight it is strictly a numbers game from here. I am ready to get my hands dirty, make big moves, and WIN THIS DAMN GAME!!!

James Hayden

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXbaQPdhQw0&feature=youtu.be

Najwah

After that whole challenge experience and this entire week, I don't even know what to say. It's been a tiring experience. Being on a tribe where no one really connects is the worst. I tried telling James that the other tribes were highly competitive but for some reason he was okay with his scores? This entire week I've barely had any sleep. Even now, it's almost 5am and people are just on our tribe, OKAY with low scores? We were doomed from the beginning. The leftovers. The unchosen ones. The losers. Honestly, it messes with you psychologically too. I'm tired of scrambling and relying on tribemates to make an effort. I wanted to work with Amy but she's so difficult to get hold of/unresponsive even though we are on similar timezones. James is hellbent on keeping it Hanúha strong and really, hope he isn't playing me. My heart honestly cannot deal any betrayal so close to merge, I'd also like to just enjoy my Saturday. I deserve to be on the merge tribe. Will most likely be at the bottom ass of the tribe but I want to be in it, nonetheless. I worked for it. And right now, I'm exhausted. Annoyed. Frustrated. Fucking mad. This tribe swap has honestly been DRAINING. Everyone is too nice and meek and people just don't care about winning lol. I hate the anxiety and sleeplessness of these past few days. I forgot what life was like before this ORG lol what did I do? I miss Leanne, still. The best person in this game. I hate it here. I just want to get to merge and be able to breathe again.

Sarah

Ahhhhh I can’t believe our tribe, Maola, won the challenge by so much. I legit thought we were going to lose and didn’t have high enough scores. Aimee freaking killed it on her scores, wow. I have been telling Aimee how to buy the small perfume bottles that give you advantages and where to get coins to buy them. She used FIVE on that challenge yesterday (I wouldn’t have used all five butttt). Part of my strategy during this tribe swap has been buying/playing advantages so we don’t have to go to tribal because I still don’t know who is close to who, and the more I’m with this tribe the more I feel like they really just don’t talk to each other and there’s not much gameplay happening. Part of my strategy with convincing Aimee to buy and use advantages was also so I know how many coins she has because that can come in handy at Merge. I also wanted to give her information about the idol hunt (which I got from others— I’ve never actually idol hunted not knowing where or what I was getting) so she could trust me. I FREAKING hope tomorrow is the Merge! How awesome would it be for our original tribe to have the majority and for me to still have an idol. I feel like after this tribe swap, Cody and I will be in the best position in the game when it comes to all of our connections with people. We have our group with Zack and Ben, I feel close with James and now Aimee, and Cody feels close with Najwah. So we really are kind of in the middle and as long as people don’t find out about how close we are, we can just get all the information from others and share with each other. I guess I won’t stop posting a brick.... sorry.

James Hayden

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zjWjJwew7rc

Zack M

welp. i think this is it. could we finally be merging tonight after tribal? or are we swapping to two tribes of 6? that would be super lame. all i know is something is happening and i'm glad because i've been so bored in this tribe. we keep winning. there's no reason to play. i need action. the third tribe that starts with a p is going to tribal again. i don't remember the name. hopefully james and najwah stay hanuha strong so we can go into the merge 7 / 5. if najwah turns she will be my #1 target. she's too dangerous for my game to allow her to run around. other than that ... we came in second during the last competition. we were so lucky. the maola tribe killed it. i wish i would have played because our teams scores were low key pathetic. the p tribe could have beat us if all their players had participated. like is kalle even playing the game? is she here? i talked to her once. i know i should reach out in case it is the merge but it almost feels pointless. i'm sure she will run back to the 3 girls in maola. pedro seems to legit want revenge for john and is open to work together. i hope he isn't lying because i truly do want to take him as far as i can. look, i know i'm talking kind of cocky but i believe in acting in the way you want things to go. i'll be a clown if i'm blindsided. i don't mind. i like clowns. however, this is the way i see it going down in my head ... - we stay hanuha strong - we get out the 3 girls from maola - we get out kalle - we take out aimee and kalle - we take out pedro and james - we then take out sarah - then we have ben cody and i at finale 3 just how we planned it it could honestly work. we just have to figure out idols and make sure no one plays them correctly. and that's where i'm at right now. wish me luck.

Aimee

http://rebloggy.com/post/gif-pokemon-cute-anime-kawaii-charmander-s01e01/106470386286 Happy dance! I’m all for keeping this tribe together. Haha I may have gone a little over board on making sure I did my best on the flash games, but you really never know what the other tribe is going to be doing or getting on these challenges. I hope this doesn’t make me look like a challenge threat if I make it to merge. Sarah has really helped me with idol hunting and finding coins and where to find the advantages. This is great trust building! Thanks Hanuha for the free coins I yoinked from one of your bags at your camp.😏 After everything that happened in the last tribe and despite me voting for her, Sarah and I have really come a long way! I truly had the wrong read on her before. She is actually now someone I am very close with and get along well! Last night after we won immunity she told me she really wants to work with me moving forward in the game! Let’s do it girl! I really enjoy talking to Grae. They seem really genuine and such a kind-hearted person. They keep giving me little messages that seem to hint at wanting to work together. I think at this point it’s unspoken but we both know we would love to. We just get along so well. I also vibe really well with Maddison and I know she could be a very good ally in the future in this game. Olivia proved she is a total team player on this tribe and listened to our advice during the immunity challenge and really stepped up her scores! I am having such a much better time on this tribe and am really enjoying myself. These relationships feel WAY more organic. I will do what I can to help keep this going! I would love to see all of us make it to merge. I’m also so so happy Najwah is still in the game after her last tribal and hopes she makes it through the next tribal!

James Hayden

We are 45 minutes away from tribal and Najwah messaged me saying Amy is ok. We were worried about her because she's been MIA over the past couple days. Per Najwah, Amy will not play her vote steal. It sounds like Amy wants out of the game and if this is what she wants, I will oblige. There's a small part of me that thinks Amy is playing us, but I don't think that's the case.

Maddison

Everyone is expecting a merge tonight, and original Maola is down in numbers. Hoping I can find cracks and worm my way in.

Pedro A

SO i told everything to zack......he seems to rule that allience....so he will 100% tell the others....and will try to take grae and maddison out...

Pedro A

Grae and Maddison just create fake alliences.so people dont write their name down....and make people feel safe... AND im here to make justice for john PERIODTTTT.... #justiceforjohn

Ben Kessler

I hope we are merging. Pedro is out for revenge against his former alliance. Zack is a threat and I need it to be known. Cody and I are hopefully solidified. If we merge, grae and maddison are apparently big threats according to Pedro. So that is fine with me. Just gotta keep making sure the people I'm closest with stay in.

Kalle N

hey I'm super high rn and I don't remember if I did this already or not so her I go. I hope we merge soon so I can vote people out that have wronged me. can't believe we won the last challenge even after I did basically nothing. ok gtg ily bye

Amy A

So this round has been tough. My Internet issues were definitely the reason my tribe lost and I wanted to quit cos I felt so terrible but I think Najwah and I can do something with my steal a vote. I’ll steal hers and vote James so no one will suspect we’re working together and then go into the merge with our little secret alliance. Bliss

Olivia A

I’m excited for merge but not sure if we’ll able to get numbers together and have a majority.

Najwah

All I know is that shit is going to hit the fan at this tribal and I'm scared as hell. Only three of us. You'd think it would be easier but it's terrifying.

Cody A

https://youtu.be/QM4CiTbrjgw

Pedro A

im scared of the merge...scared of the girls allience...scared of me being a target...for being a wild card ...and scared of maddison and graeee.....kill me at this point

#episodes

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canaryatlaw · 6 years

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alright, so today was overall pretty good (I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of writing that). I dragged my ass out of bed at 7:15 am for church, and ended up having to bolt out the door to make the 7:41 bus, or I’d have to wait another 25 minutes for the next one, which would effectively get me there late (service starts at 9, takes an hour to get there, either 8:40 or 9:05). When I was on the train not too far from church, I was approached by a man who appeared to be homeless, and asked if I had any money. Now, strangely enough for me, I was completely out of energy bars, singles, fives, or even quarters. The only thing I had on me was a twenty I was planning on putting in the offering plate in church. He could see the twenty in my wallet and very kindly and timidly asked if I would be willing to trade the twenty for ten singles he had collected. And I felt God pulling at my heart strings, and I thought I wouldn’t be a very good Christian if I refused to help my neighbor who’s right in front of me when I had the ability to do so when I was on my way to CHURCH for pete’s sake. So I smiled and agreed, and he got so happy, he just kept smiling and saying thank you, and was happily telling me that now he could pay for his and his wife’s treatment (I didn’t ask what for). I ended up writing up the incident in a Facebook post later on in the day, while making a point to add I feel that it’s even more important for Christians to be performing tangible acts of kindness to those around us and in our community when there are people right now who are calling themselves “Christians” but are defiling the word with their doing and defending despicable behavior. I also made sure to write a part about how I sincerely hope people don't think I post these things because I’m trying to humble brag or talk about how much of a good person I am, but because I truly hope it inspires people to be kind to the people in their lives and increase their witness. anyway. Got to church and it was pretty empty, which was weird because I’ve always only been there while there was already a service going on, lol. But I went to the volunteer lounge and chilled out for a bit before heading to the service. Worship was great as always, and then we had an announcement that the family who were more or less second in command (after our lead pastors) are moving to California and the husband/dad is taking over as lead pastor for a church there, which is of course very exciting for them but they will dearly be missed. We got into the sermon, continuing our series on King David, entitled caves x crowns (as in, him hiding in caves while Saul was chasing him till when he was crowned king). Our female lead pastor was preaching, and I always appreciate getting to here from her. We picked up from last week, where Saul was dead and David effectively became king, and wanted to bring the ark of the covenant (cue the indiana jones reference) back to Jerusalem. much of the message centered around 2 Samuel 6:22, a verse I know by heart as it was theme verse of one of my high school extracurriculars, which in itself brings up some unpleasant memories so I’m not going to go into that. but basically the story is David was happy the ark was here and dancing like crazy, and his wife (or one of his wives) told him he looked stupid, and he basically said I don’t care, I just want to worship God. And this of course translates into our lives as to how we think about what other people will think about us when we’re worshipping, and not focusing on actually praising him. It was good stuff. I put then ten singles I had been given into the offering plate when it came around. Service ended, and I headed over to the babies room for the second service. Last week was apparently a bit of a disaster during both services, all the babies were crying and we were very understaffed, so this week we had a record number of 6 people in the room, and ended up with 6 babies, which is about as perfect of a ratio as you could ask for. I held one little guy for a while, then switched over to another after he got a little fussy. but by and large almost no baby cried for any somewhat substantial period of time, which is like a freaking miracle, or at least positive karma coming back after last week. So that was overall lovely, the babies were all oh so cute. Service ended, I start on my way home, got some time to kill between the train and the bus and it is COLD outside, so I stop into the donut/coffee shop and got what I got from there a few weeks ago, a spiced apple “chai-der” (as in chai and apple cider) drink that is quite good and I can drink for all intents and purposes, so that’s cool. Got on the bus and came home, started on my reading pretty quickly. It was only about 2 at this point, so getting out of church earlier is very nice. Did legal profession, then hopped over to bus orgs, which I got a good chunk of done, and will continue it tomorrow during my down time between meetings and doctors appointments and class (tomorrow will be a bit busy). But I read until 7 pm before adjourning for the night and watching some Mindhunter. I ended up finishing the series, and I guess I was kind of underwhelmed by the ending, it didn't feel like much of a conclusion, and it was kind of like everything just fell to shit, even though we did have some notice they were coming. I’m not sure how I’m supposed to feel about the characters at this point, but Jonathan Groff did a fantastic job in his role, so that’s good. And after I finished I started getting ready for bed, and that’s about it. Tomorrow I got a brief PAD meeting at 12, then a doctor’s appointment at 2, then class at 5:50, so it should be a little crazy, but ultimately manageable (I hope so, anyway). Alright, I think I’m done for the night. Goodnight my dears. Have as lovely a Monday as Mondays could possibly be.

#daily journal #November 2017

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diaryofalexis-blog1 · 7 years

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Advice for CV/Resume & Cover Letter

Original Content By Queen-Dread - Reposting to hide it under a link.

Right now, I’m sifting through 50+ applications for a new entry-level position. Here’s some advice from the person who will actually be looking at your CV/resume and cover letter:

‘You must include a cover letter’ does not mean ‘write a single line about why you want this position’. If you can’t be bothered to write at least one actual paragraphs about why you want this job, I can’t be bothered to read your CV.

Don’t bother including a list of your interests if all you can think of is ‘socialising with friends’ and ‘listening to music’. Everyone likes those things. Unless you can explain why the stuff you do enriches you as a person and a candidate (e.g. playing an instrument or a sport shows dedication and discipline) then I honestly don’t care how you spend your time. I won’t be looking at your CV thinking ‘huh, they haven’t included their interests, they must have none’, I’m just looking for what you haveincluded.

Even if you apply online, I can see the filename you used for your CV. Filenames that don’t include YOUR name are annoying. Filenames like ‘CV - media’ tell me that you’ve got several CVs you send off depending on the kind of job advertised and that you probably didn’t tailor it for this position. ‘[Full name] CV’ is best.

USE. A. PDF. All the meta information, including how long you worked on it, when you created it, times, etc, is right there in a Word doc. PDFs are far more professional looking and clean and mean that I can’t make any (unconscious or not) decisions about you based on information about the file.

I don’t care what the duties in your previous unrelated jobs were unless you can tell me why they’re useful to this job. If you worked in a shop, and you’re applying for an office job which involves talking to lots of people, don’t give me a list of stuff you did, write a sentence about how much you enjoyed working in a team to help everyone you interacted with and did your best to make them leave the shop with a smile. I want to know what makes you happy in a job, because I want you to be happy within the job I’m advertising.

Does the application pack say who you’ll be reporting to? Can you find their name on the company website? Address your application to them. It’s super easy and shows that you give enough of a shit to google something. 95% of people don’t do this.

Tell me who you are. Tell me what makes you want to get up in the morning and go to work and feel fulfilled. Tell me what you’re looking for, not just what you think I’m looking for.

I will skim your CV. If you have a bunch of bullet points, make every one of them count. Make the first one the best one. If it’s not interesting to you, it’s probably not interesting to me. I’m overworked and tired. Make my job easy.

“I work well in a team or individually” okay cool, you and everyone else. If the job means you’ll be part of a big team, talk about how much you love teamwork and how collaborating with people is the best way to solve problems. If the job requires lots of independence, talk about how you are great at taking direction and running with it, and how you have the confidence to follow your own ideas and seek out the insight of others when necessary. I am profoundly uninterested in cookie-cutter statements. I want to know how you actually work, not how a teacher once told you you should work.

For an entry-level role, tell me how you’re looking forward to growing and developing and learning as much as you can. I will hire genuine enthusiasm and drive over cherry-picked skills any day. You can teach someone to use Excel, but you can’t teach someone to give a shit. It makes a real difference.

This is my advice for small, independent orgs like charities, etc. We usually don’t go through agencies, and the person reading through the applications is usually the person who will manage you, so it helps if you can give them a real sense of who you are and how you’ll grab hold of that entry level position and give it all you’ve got. This stuff might not apply to big companies with actual HR departments - it’s up to you to figure out the culture and what they’re looking for and mirror it. Do they use buzzwords? Use the same buzzwords! Do they write in a friendly, informal way? Do the same! And remember, 95% of job hunting (beyond who you know and flat-out nepotism, ugh) is luck. If you keep getting rejected, it’s not because you suck. You might just need a different approach, or it might just take the right pair of eyes landing on your CV.

And if you get rejected, it’s worthwhile asking why. You’ve already been rejected, the worst has already happened, there’s really nothing bad that can come out of you asking them for some constructive feedback (politely, informally, “if it isn’t too much trouble”). Pretty much all of us have been hopeless jobseekers at one point or another. We know it’s shitty and hard and soul-crushing. Friendliness goes a long way. Even if it’s just one line like “your cover letter wasn’t inspiring" at least you know where to start.

And seriously, if you have any friends that do any kind of hiring or have any involvement with that side of things, ask them to look at your CV with a big red pen and brutal honesty. I do this all the time, and the most important thing I do is making it so their CV doesn’t read exactly like that of every other person who took the same ‘how-to-get-a-job’ class in school. If your CV has a paragraph that starts with something like ‘I am a highly motivated and punctual individual who–’ then oh my god I AM ALREADY ASLEEP.

Addendum: Stop sending me rude messages about this post, jesus christ. I DID NOT INVENT CAPITALISM OR THE TORTUROUS HELLSCAPE THAT IS THE JOB MARKET CULTURE. I GET PAID LIKE SHIT. I’M JUST AN EXHAUSTED MANAGER TRYING HER BEST. and i mean if you can’t take honest advice without complaining about how it’s phrased then boy howdy do i have some bad news for you about the big, mean world of jobhunting…

#Job Hunting Advice

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yakumtsaki · 7 years

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Everybody, yeeeeah rock your body, yeeeeeah everybody, rock. your. body. right. BACKSTREET’S BACK. ALRIGHT

SO. I’m tired of waiting for Kim’s flaky ass to show up so we go ahead and adopt this Kim-clone named Sophie aka our 6th fucking cat. I’m gonna complete Komei’s lifetime want if it kills me and honestly it might just do it. Right off the bat I have a bad feeling about this cat bc of her unfortunate name. I’ve never met a girl named Sophia I didn’t aggressively hate but I’m like ok maybe this Sophia will break the curse..

NOP. First thing fucking Sophie does is murder our beloved Mr Bear that we’ve had since Daniel was born. An amazing way to endear yourself to your new family.

-The affair shrine is next! You heathens are gonna see the light of the Lord!

Oh great, all we were missing was a christian fundamentalist in this house. Welcome aboard, Soph!

The cat fight club comprised of Victor, Ronron and Neo is completely out of control. It’s gotten to the point where everyone else in the house has ran out of fucks to give:

-Yea my son and my stalker are trying to kill each other, what else is new.. Wake me up when September ends.

Yea and wake me up when September starts cause I’m gonna be retaking my finals around that time.

Sophie: Road to Redemption.

-THERE’S ONLY ONE ROAD TO REDEMPTION AND IT’S THROUGH OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST

Shut it, Westboro.

Dear Diary,

How you’ve been? Sorry I haven’t written to you in 20 years, things have been pretty hectic what with raising 6 cats and having a bunch of kids and guarding my yard decorations from Shea Johnston.

So to fill you in on the important happenings, Professional Make-Up Cop returned Neo to me and oh, diary, songs will be sung of that day. It was one of the happiest moments of my life, second only to the discovery that Jojo got the jaw. How lucky that it would happen to that little asshole?! He’s definitely my least favorite kid. God truly helps the virtuous..

In sad news, diary, Mr Bear has tragically met an untimely end at the claws of my new cat, Tea Party congressional candidate Sophie. You know me, diary, I love all my cats equally, but my parenting skills are being put to the test. I will find a way to reach that cat though, diary, mark my words. Or I will return her to the pound as soon as she tops her career. Whichever comes first.

I need to leave you now, diary, much like his mother, little Gunther has grown up to be quite the whorelord and I’ve been picking up the phone 200 fucking times a day. I still prefer him to Jojo though. Fuck that kid.

See you in 20 years,

Komei Pussy Magnet Tellerman Union

Speaking of Jojo, he’s now able to search for ufos. Exciting! Too bad this new ability is completely useless cause we all know what he’s looking at..

-FOR THE LAST TIME YOU ABSOLUTE FUCKING FREAKSHOW, WILL YOU CUT IT THE FUCK OUT

-Really Stephen, those are the pajamas you wear?? Who’s crazy now!

I’m gonna go with ‘person standing in the rain in a bowtie at 4am spying on an innocent family’ but idk, the jury’s still out. A phrase I suspect you’ll be hearing a lot in the future.

Meanwhile Komei keeps kicking down our flamingo?? Wtf Komei. Don’t we have enough problems without having to worry about you and your slow but steady mental breakdown?

Thank god for Gunther, sleepless guardian of the yard.

-HOW FUCKING DARE YOU DAD

-Oh grow up, Gunther, those flamingos are stupid and you’re stupid for liking them!

-Big talk from someone whose biggest dream is to have 6 cats top their careers!

-You really want to talk about lifetime wants, Mr Visionary?

-BEING AN ART SCHOOL DROPOUT GIGOLO IS A REAL JOB DAD

Don’t listen to that dream killing asshole, Gunther, look how well you’re doing! You have more scholarships than fucking flop Jojo! Can’t believe all that ballet paid off. I’m gonna reward you for your hard work, time to call Ivy, she’s gonna be our 5th make out!

-NOICE

WELL FUCK YOU TOO IVY

-What is this strange feeling? I’ve never experienced it before.

It’s called rejection Gunther, you should give Daniel a call, he has vast experience in the area.

Daniel does call the next day wanting to.. talk to Victoria??? What on earth. As seen above, the tradition of Victoria scarring him psychologically is obviously alive and well.

-You won’t believe this, Dylan, but I banged Malcolm right before my birthday with your father in the next room! Don’t worry, I’ll email you all the hot details later!

I mean, at least they’re talking? Progress!

-Ah, I’m just killing it in every single aspect of my life. EVERY SINGLE ONE. ESPECIALLY THE ROMANTIC ONE. NO ONE REJECTED ME. NO ONE

Really Gunther, I can’t deal with your half-assed coping mechanisms right now, we have bigger problems, as in THE LOT IS LAGGING LIKE CRAZY THANKS TO OUR MILLIONS OF CATS. I have never in my life had lag like this, literal ts3 teas. Every time someone comes back from work the lot freezes for 2 minutes this shit is fucking unreal.

At least Sophie proves she’s worth the lag by constantly destroying important objects, like Gunther’s fucking homework.

-HAHA SAY GOODBYE TO THAT SCHOLARSHIP YOU VILE WHORE. ABSTINENCE ONLY EDUCATION IN SCHOOLS

You know how sometimes you look back and realize that if something completely random and insignificant hadn’t happened, everything would have been different? Well crazy christian cat destroying Gunther’s homework is one of those moments cause I drag Gunther out of the house to do his homework while he still can.. And thank god I do because otherwise..

WE WOULD HAVE MISSED MELODY TINKER PASSING BY. HOW. HOW HAD I NOT THOUGHT OF THIS ICONIC SUNGLASSES PAIRING BEFORE.

Are you guys seeing this adorable shit?? They look so right together, even their ridiculous outfits complement each other ❤ I had someone else in mind for Gunther but this changes everything, especially because..

NATURAL 3 FUCKING BOLTS. EVEN THO HE’S ROMANCE AND SHE’S KNOWLEDGE. LITERALLY UNHEARD OF.

The start of something beautiful is interrupted by this parallel universe punk Komei passing by. Can you guess what he does next even tho we obviously didn’t greet him?

UGH. This hairstyle is straight up CURSED.

-I’m getting the strongest urge to put you to work..

GTFO. Why must the Komeis of the world ruin every romantic moment??

Speaking of ruining the moment, Jojo returns from work aka the lot freezes for 2 mins. But he reached the top of his career again so we get the scholarship back. Congrats Jo!

-I’M FUCKING EXHAUSTED IM GONNA PASS OUT RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF GUNTHER’S DATE

Get your ass inside right now and STOP STAYING UP ALL NIGHT WATCHING STEPHEN SLEEP

-Wait is that his daughter??? I NEED TO TALK TO HER

Yea you absolutely won’t be doing that nor coming anywhere near her.

-But then how am I gonna collect her DNA to clone my own Stephen?

GO TO BED

-AW it’s a love letter to me from Marisa ❤

LMAO you wish Komes, it’s from Ruskie to Gunther but yea, take that shit out of there and gtfo, I don’t anything ruining our Melody date.

Like say, fucking useless asshole Sophie getting demoted AND FREEZING THE LOT FOR 5 MINUTES. Her flopping at her job is gonna become a running theme cause her fun and social are permanently in the red and I have no idea wtf her problem is since we have a million toys and cats for her to play with. GOD SOPHIE

-Don’t take the Lord’s name in vain!

STFU

If there’s anything I hate more than shy sims, it’s not much. Somehow tho I find the shy animations super cute when Melody does them??

-Me too!

I know Guns! Let’s get the girl.

Nice! Busting a move does it again!

Aww! What classic song are you crazy kids slow dancing to?

-Aayooo, I’m tired of using technology.. Why don’t you sit down on top of me ♫

-Wow, that’s beautiful, Gunther..

Thank you, 50 Cent! Justin you can go fuck yourself, #teamBrit

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

Things progress rapidly like always and 5 makeouts are finally achieved! Gunther has now gotten with more sims than every other member of the family combined. So proud :’)

God, I never get tired of the view of aspiration points lighting up the night sky. GET IT GUNS

LOL. Gunther I don’t know how to break this to you so I’m just gonna go with blunt and insulting: time to close your legs. Welcome to monogamy! Let’s see how long you last.

Man, it’s nice when things come full circle. Gunther is still picking up the flamingo but now a new otp has been born! How much time we’ve wasted gunning for the wrong Tinker..

-It’s not wasted time if you enjoy doing it!

Yea that radioactive glow you have going is doing wonders for your credibility, Jo..

..as is this farewell meeting with the president of the ridiculous hairstyle org. Wow, we haven’t seen him in a long time. ~nostalgia

-Jojo! I understand you’re leaving for college today and dropped in to remind you that there’s always a place for you in our organization when you graduate. Make us proud son!

-I really don’t care about making you or anyone else proud, Mr President, since the only opinion that matters is my own, but I certainly appreciate the sentiment. I have something to remind you as well: I’m coming for you. There’s only room for one top freak in this neighborhood.

And he’s off! Dressed to impress I see. You wear a bowtie to spy on Stephen but your pj’s for the first day of college.

-Yea, it’s called having your priorities straight. As if I’d dress up for those plebs that should be honored BY MY MERE PRESENCE.

Oh this is gonna be unbearable. Well at least it’s only FOUR FUCKING YEARS. Time to have Sophie start praying for my soul.

#ts2 #sims 2 #union legacy

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radfem-advice · 7 years

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Even after years of involvement in the LGBT community (as a president of different orgs, no less), I'm still scared that I'm going to hell for being a lesbian. It's stunting my ability to form relationships and I'm just so tired.

Hello! I’m so sorry that you’re feeling so scared. First of all, I have no idea what your religious beliefs are. I am not very religious myself but if a god exists, all religions claim that god is compassionate, forgiving, kind, etc.

Now I want you to ask yourself “who are the people who normally go to hell, according to most religions?” People who hurt others and people who have bad intentions about others. People who WANT to hurt other people.

You’re a lesbian. This doesn’t hurt anybody. I assume that you probably don’t plan on intentionally hurting anyone. You’re just existing the way you are, and you are not a bad person for it therefore you won’t go to hell. You don’t belong in the same group as murderers, child rapists, etc just for loving women!

Don’t let homophobic people get to you. You are a great wonderful person. Don’t feel guilty for being a lesbian. You’ve done nothing wrong. If the feeling doesn’t go away, try to talk to more lesbians about it. I’m sure that it’s a shared experience and that they’ll help you through it.

if any lesbians share the same experience please feel free to comment on this.

#askbox #rape mention 345 #murder mention 36622

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aboutprei · 7 years

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Okay another blog post for today because I’m a week late for all the Holiday spirit & Happy New year greetings hehe

Thank you Lord for all the blessings and great opportunities that you have given to me last year!

Hello 2017! But first thank you 2016 it’s been awesooommeee!

2016 have been filled with so many opportunities & great experiences. Indeed, if you gave up everything to God's plan He will surely lead your way. As for me, I started it with a devotion & a prayer. No resolutions or whatsoever. I simply ask God for a good year and all the things I will be doing will be for His glory. Each month had passed & God truly made it incredible.

Highlights of my 2016:

VPAPU Membership

I didn't expect to be elected as VPAPU's Executive Vice President for Membership because ‘you know’ additional responsibility plus I’m not into being one of the officers that time because I’m currently doing my thesis and on to finish my internship duty hours. Yet they still entrusted the job to me; Monitoring all the members and somehow I’m like their mother, oh yes that’s been fun. I love my org! Ended my term this 2016 & survived it! Thank you, Lord!

OBRA 11 - Gallery Manager "Roadtrip: Chasing wanderlust"

chosen to lead the VPAPU's annual Art Exhibit with my very own concept is one of my achievement this 2016 yet its been a wild ride, because managing an art exhibit while acads, org/membership duties, thesis paperworks & internship --is very tiring and stressful. Balancing my time is a MUST and yes, I survived this too! A successful event! Thank you VPAPU for letting me lead this one, for all your help, effort & for believing in my concept. Thank you so much!

Pintura & Co. - Online Business

I swear! I really think twice if I can do this. Starting a business has been one of my dreams and managing it all by myself can be a pretty tough one. Blessed to found someone as eager as I am to fulfill this dream, my business partner Ate Abigail/Tums, she also loves to paint & wants to be her own boss plus she has an experience on managing business back then, so yup we just clicked! We made it possible and started Pintura & Co. even though we’re just a student. Yay!

The Craft Central, Greenbelt 5

Pintura & Co.'s first blessing this year was to be chosen from 170 consignors & be one of the brand partners in The Craft Central's 1st ever store in Greenbelt 5, Makati City. I’ve never been so thrilled before except for this. I am forever grateful! It's all from God!

Now, a whole new year is ahead of me. I just want to say that keep on believing in yourself, set your priorities straight, pray a lot, keep your faith and always work hard to the things you really want to achieve in life and God will help you through those tough times. You’ll be surprise on what He can do to your life.

I will just do this things all over again for 2017. I'm prepared because God is with me. Again, thank you family, friends & Amory! For supporting, helping and always being there for me this 2016! I love you all! Let's make another awesome year filled with love & happiness!!!! Cheers!

#lifelately #thoughts

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erickmalpicaflores · 6 years

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Erik Malpica Flores Erik Malpica Flores recommends: SUITS Midseason Finale Recap: Litt Comes At You Fast |

The SUITS midseason finale wrapped up the Great Name Parter Battle of 2018. But wait! There’s more! As the result of Alex Williams’ and Samantha Wheeler’s final showdown — at least for now — Zane Specter Litt experienced yet another major change. Remember when Robert Zane and Harvey Specter weren’t sure who would be managing partner of their newly-merged firm; but they were able to agree that, “either way, Litt comes last,” if nothing else? Well. Litt comes at you fast.

Life, much like Litt, comes at you fast. Well, Suitors, here are the facts. First impressions are not always everything; and when I’m wrong, I say I’m wrong. Once upon a time, Katherine Heigl appeared to be the wrong choice for a new SUITS cast member; and her character, Samantha Wheeler, seemed more like a nuisance — at best — than one worthy of sharing the spotlight with, much like taking it from, established ones. In “Managing Partner,” though, Heigl’s performance was one of the strongest. And Sam was easily the most interesting part of the SUITS mid-season finale’s central rivalry.

Perhaps it was learning Sam’s real background that did the trick. In the typically strong SUITS flashback fashion, the episode told the story of how Samantha Wheeler and Robert Zane became so close. In the early days, before Rand Kaldor Zane even existed, Samantha and Robert became allies in finding out what kind of dirty dealing was being done at Jarvis & Other Lawyers Whose Names We’ve Already Forgotten. An FBI agent had blackmailed Sam into investigating money laundering at the firm; seemingly, Robert just had a feeling something was wrong and wanted to get to the bottom of it.

As it turned out, Robert had already learned about the money laundering six months earlier — something Sam found out when her share of the searching for “something shady” didn’t pan out — and had been paid a significant bonus to make him look complicit. Robert didn’t want anything to do with the money, so he gave it to charity; but a younger, less-used-to-the-game Sam was upset that he hadn’t gone to the authorities. It was when Zane appealed to Sam’s humanity by mentioning that he wanted to protect his daughter, who wanted to be a lawyer one day, that she decided not to report her findings to the FBI. Instead, the two lawyers worked out a way to keep Zane’s name from being dirtied by his partners’ bad decisions, and it involved the birth of Rand Kaldor Zane.

When Tom, the FBI agent, asked Sam why it wasn’t her name on the wall, she said it was because it wasn’t her time yet — but it would be one day. And this is where Ms. Wheeler becomes such a very, very compelling character. Her thanks for keeping Robert (and, by extension, Rachel) safe was to wait around for 12 years for her time to come. During those 12 years, she was Robert’s righthand woman and, apparently, used her talents to his and his clients’ advantage — even if it meant delving into slightly unethical territory. Robert then used that unethical territory as his excuse for not promoting her.

Fast forward to the present day, when Sam felt that she was finally going to get what she had earned all those years ago…but then there was Harvey’s promise to Alex Williams. That little girl who grew up without knowing who her parents were, who was desperate for a good father figure, was almost victimized by always supporting this person who didn’t seem to have any interest in supporting her. Worse yet, it was in wanting to keep yet another daughter — Gavin Andrews’ — from facing the consequences of her father’s ugly actions that she made the mistake that costs her the solo promotion to name partner that she deserved.

Had this background for SUITS’ eighth season’s big story been in place much sooner, the Rehashed Who’s Name Partner Struggle of 2018 could have been a huge hit. Instead, it narrowly escaped becoming a miss.

Litt comes at you fast. Predictably, Williams v. Wheeler had the potential to destroy the firm, and that left Paulsen to find a way to hold it all together. With the stakes so high, both Zane and Specter proved they were unworthy of being managing partner; so, as is SUITS tradition, it was time to make a leadership change. On top of adding two new name partners — yep! The entire “only one name goes on the wall” drama was for nothing! — the firm had to rearrange the existing ones.

Just as major personal changes had Louis Litt ready to take on less responsibility at work, Donna approached him about becoming Insert Firm Name Here’s latest boss. Litt was the only person who had cared enough about the firm to ask other key players (like one Katrina Bennett) not to get involved, and he was even willing to step down and remove his name from the wall in order to make room for the two new ones. It was precisely this willingness to minimize damage and put the firm first, no matter the personal cost, that convinced Donna that Louis was the only person capable of being the adult in the office.

After consulting with Sheila, which was only fair given the couple’s disagreement over whether she should accept a new job title, Louis was ready to seize his rightful seat on the Iron Throne at the head of the table. After Donna had already set him up, all he had to do was swoop in at the right time and say the right things; but as we learned later when Donna and Harvey did their obligatory “let’s confuse the viewers” thing, Donna was the one who had given Louis pointers on exactly what to say and how to say it. So, Litt may officially be the managing parter, but we all know who really runs the show here.

Let’s just call it The Paulsen Firm and get it over with. It has a nice ring to it, anyway.

Thoughts!

“We know that you’ve served your country once before. It’s the chance to serve it again.” Ok, what now? I’m going to need to know more about this.

“Are you saying you’re the new managing partner?” I have never seen the man so smitten.

“Because I don’t mind defending criminals, but I didn’t put myself through law school to work for them.” Two interesting points here: First, ohhhhhh, the irony of working for/with Harvey Specter and Louis Litt, who had broken the law by keeping a fraud at their firm. Second, did 12 Years Ago Robert not realize that defending criminals was…working for them? Interesting.

Donna reminded Louis that his baby will be here in nine months, so I guess that means we’ll need a new-new-new-new-new-new-new-new managing partner sooner rather than later. Her name should be Donna Paulsen, by the way.

Imagine ruining someone’s moral compass in order to make sure that your own shady behavior wouldn’t make it difficult for your daughter to become a lawyer, only to have her fall in love with Mike Ross.

Side note: I miss Rachel Zane.

“I’m not a leader. They won’t follow me.” Raise your hand if your heart hurts.

“Because it’s what insurance companies do: They blame someone else; they call it an act of God. Or, they just say, ‘screw you, come and get it.’” Find the lie. Spoiler: There isn’t one.

“What is it going to take for you to get off the sidelines?” The delivery. Being wrong about Heigl never felt so good.

“Your daughter. I helped you because I would’ve given anything to have someone like you looking out for me, and I didn’t want to take it away from her.” Sam is now a part of a firm that’s a family above all else. It’s what she deserves.

Louis and Harvey hugged. I’m fine.

Alex was willing to put Katrina at risk by having her essentially impersonate Samantha, but he wasn’t willing to let Gavin McJerkface take his burn book on Sam to the Bar. That’s…interesting, to say the least.

For once, Sheila was right. There is no reason why having a child means she should turn down a major promotion. This whole, “how do you have it all” thing that we always ask women? And the constant personal versus professional struggle? It’s tired. Unless we’re going to ask men the same questions and write our male characters as giving up their dreams in order to have families, we need to stop doing it with women.

Sheila was so early into her pregnancy that she didn’t have even a suspicion about it, but then she was immediately able to blame her fight with Louis on “hormones.” Sure, SUITS. That’s exactly how women’s bodies work. Next, we’ll find out that Donna only kissed Harvey that one time because she had PMS or something equally as stupid.

“It means they beat us at our own game, Samantha — whether we like it or not. But do you know what that means? We are surrounded by some badass people. So, let’s stop fighting in here and start fighting everyone else out there.” We. Love. This.

“They’re either both going to accept this, or they’re both going to walk the fuck out the door. Because I am sick of this shit. And I’ll tell you something else: You two are going to goddamn sell it to them.” Rick Hoffman is a gem. Also, in case no one was already aware of this: I, too, was sick of this shit.

“Come on, Pretty.” Was grabbing his arm necessary? What about walking so close together that they may as well have been holding hands? Why is this happening? Can’t wait for it to be completely ignored in SUITS 8.5!

SUITS returns to USA in 2019 with the eighth season’s final six episodes.

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jeffxjustin · 6 years

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whatever

its not new year yet but i got compelled to write this thing up. primarily bec im very unstable right now due to the frappe i drank around 10 [i dont really know how much caffeine content it has but whatever im palpitating rn]

this year taught me the other side of the world. or another side of the world. i got to see firsthand the things that i only hear. i got to do things i might have imagined. honestly im a pretty lax person. as much as i want to move around and learn new things [for real, im not joking], ive got this other side of getting contented with what i have. and that’s what i am before 2017. dont mistake me though, i still has that tendency of being contented with my current life. but that’s just boring and so my other self kicks in. i cant stand stale and boring things. /maybe thats why i got consistency probs with the things i do/

2017 abused my other self. this year.i learned how to be organized, how to deal with multiple fronts. i need to be mentally fine since i got four orgs, and three of them im handling. and honestly, im handling them in a bad shit manner. im the current KLYN head and i cant fully commit to it since im also an executive in two other orgs [yea this is where i say i envy a/mrie’s skills]. kinda doing fine with LAYB since we got ppl and we got money to run it, and i performed quite a bit fine with PLSS. i still underperformed though, as i need to manage my time with the other orgs while maintaining a fine academic performance. i joined CNS bec i know it’ll boost my knowledge.

i failed to achieve at least an honor roll for the past two semesters. that’s bec last last sem i was too stressed to focus on acads while doing work. it was also my first time doing REAL org work. and so being new to the surroundings, i struggled. managed to ace some subjects, but that’s it. this second semester, the combined struggles of the four organizations made my acad time less and less. i knew in myself i can ace the subjects 107, 114 and SOSC4 but again, when i return home, i was too tired to read the required readings since im doing administrative work from organizations. [not to mention i became the educ head of ORCC. stressful but i really enjoyed that work for real]

im not ranting bec these things gave me stress. yes it was fucking stressful and im ready to throw the shit away but hey, gotta appreciate the things happened. if not for all of these, im still a shit of a person [ey, im still a shit guy 2000 but i kno i got better]. all of the other work seemed pretty easy as i steered my work and acads properly on the second half of the last sem. however im not contented. i need to perform better. i know i still need to be bette e ee e e r e r e r r r

bloop

hey. what for. better for what. stfu. purposeless

shit, shut up.

okay. im fine haha im back. so yea, i need to be better. esp on the KLYN. former head mite be judging me rn for handling it badly we had no proper outputs when she left. [hi, im sorry babawi ako] so my task is to make KLYN better, and i got plans already. also, i need to be better with PLSS. although i got really great database, i still lack proper things. but ofc i had it already planned too. also with LAYB. i had planned everything WHICH I NEVER DID BEFORE 2017. cool shit

and also, my crit thinking got revamped. winks- gonna thank my profs and closest circle for it.

so im gon thank everyone who helped me achieved whatever i am rn. still basic uncultured boi ppl know but i get to improve at least. actually the catalyst for this change is me liking a/mrie ahaha if not for her i wont join KLYN. if not for her constant nudgings on doing work ill never learn the administrative skills i have rn, although it was subpar vs hers. so hi thanks for everything ur the plot twist of my 2017 haha. ill always be grateful on ur help, even if u didnt intend it, maybe haha.

thanking my profs esp mayor, zaldy and yvan. these guys taught me well. if not for them, im still in the dirt of theory.

thanking KLYN ppl and my tibak friennds. really understanding circle. great friends.

thanking LAYB ppl. i knew i suck on poetry bt when i got commended on my poem for her bday, i knew i improved [although i still wonder if she liked that. well whatever au fait lang naman ata nagdala don]

thanking my twin althea. we are twins bec we know each other so well plus we r both sagi virgo peeps and so we pretty much relate to almost everything /almost bec we dont have the same music taste, movie shit and ofc lovelife lol/. thanking u bec u taught me how to act on certain situations. u r always there when i say to myself ‘ey god im such a pussy im stupid when will i stop being a pussy’ or whatever. u contributed to my growth as a person.

finally, thanking the Freehunters. plus mervin. these guys quenched my thirst for knowledge. this is my closest circle. we tried to make ourselves better. look at us now. look at me now. friends, di na ko bobo dahil sainyo haha. my crit skills vastly improved. our friendship had ups and downs and we tried to maintain our circle as possible. remember we aint perfect. i know were kinda broken as of now but we are still here. cheers, best of the best.

sorry if im too slow to change but i kno im accomplishing things. and thats better than none. but that doesnt stop there. i want more e e eee e e e

bloop

want more for huh now i laugh

shit shut up.

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survivorcordillerablanca · 7 years

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Episode 5 Confessionals

aw man i was looking forward to playing with adam

im starting an alliance to get out jordan pines

Wow so a lot has happened. First and most importantly, I HAVE AN IMMUNITY IDOL???? LIKE WHOEVER AT ULTA IS MY GUARDIAN ANGEL AND DECIDED TO GIVE THAT TO ME I LITERALLY OWE MY ENTIRE LIFE TO THEM. Maybe they thought I was in danger since I wasn't at the immunity challenge? I don't know what it was but damn and I glad they're looking out for me. Jordan Pines told me that Jay is a little weary of trusting me which is like ????? i've never given him any reason not to trust me but w/ever. I lowkey think Jordan may have said the same thing to Jay about me so that he has both of us not trusting the other and only trusting him: i see you Jordan Pines!!! Also my tribe is dunb because I need to sleep soon but mone of them are talking to me in the tribe chat so it's their fault I only have 4 songs for this challenge katiecan’t believe we won when ya’ll were all struggling to figure out what songs were in that sdhljshdsd

Get shook because Jay is in a good position early for the first time in 3 seasons! Everyone on this tribe thinks I'm their best friend and I love it. The plan going forward is to work with Jordan if we lose, or if we win and swap; get Katie, Charlotte, Carson, or Zach to work with me. If we lose, I'm gonna target Ryan. I think I have a better bond with Lexi than both Jordan and Luke. So maybe I'll be able to be Lexi's lifeline after that. If for some reason we don't swap and we lose again, I'll take my shot at Pines. But that seems unlikely. Winning twice seems mostly out of the question, but I think I'm in this game for the long haul. At least I hope I am.

we keep losing. Why? I don't usually lose challenges so its very weird for me to..... lose. It's getting harder each round too, like i had no intentions of voting adam off anywhere near this early but we had to. and if we lose again.... oh boy, not gonna be fun.

Wish a host would tell me: Congratulations! You did not earn a task but you did earn an Idol Clue! The Ulta Idol is located along the river on the bottom of the map. With this clue you have earned an additional guess this round!. Instead of: Congratulations! You found a Hidden Immunity Idol! However....you found the Copa idol. You have 1 hour to decide which member of the Copa Tribe gets this idol! DSFDSFHDSJFH! But anyways now that I know that its along the river on the bottom of the map I can have a better show I guess. I think we might lose this immunity due to us not being able to be on at the same time. So... YIKES

Okay so I just was informed that I received the wishing well task! My task wasn't super bad, and I told Carson/Charlotte about it. Was that a mistake? Yes. Charlotte and I are not on best terms right now, which i'll explain in a bit. I completed the task and got the Golden Rope. I think it may be really good, and i'm excited to use it in merge phase if I make it that far. If I get eliminated, i'll likely give it to Carson. I'm hoping we win immunity again though AJSDGK The reason why Char and I aren't on good terms is because I totally flipped on our alliance and voted her out in Kuang Si (a main season) and I feel shitty but ASJDGK anyway wee woo im stressed

i kinda shock myself with how fake i can be wow. like i stayed on call for 2 hours and 3 mins for that fucking guess who challenge talking to bryce charlotte and occasionally rtp i was just like..

like i just didnt wanna be yelled at for hanging up! but we did that, and i feel like i have a PRETTY decent game rn and going to tribal would fuck it up, so ill try working my connections

im pretty sure charlotte wants zach out?? like how petty do you need to be to get so mad that u want someone out in other games bc they voted u out to further their games. like?? whatevs, her problem. zachs definitiely my closest ally and i trust him. im rlly happy he got the golden rope even though im still bitter i didnt get my reward :) also at the wishing well i got an idol clue where apparently the idol is on the bottom river which whew!! im excited. hopefully i can get the idol at least.. really hope ulta can ride this momentum to the end. OH AND ALSO BRYCE GAVE THE COPA IDOL TOL UKE BC EVERYONE WAS FIGHTING FOR LUKE TO GET IT IN OUR ALLIANCE CHAT like i dont hate luke and i wouldve preferred for jay to get it but idc.

i feel good about this immunity challenge!

okay so we lost. we didn't even take 5 minutes out of our day to think about the challenge. we're kind of a lazy tribe just tryna have a good time. lexi didn't show up and luke had to go to bed waiting for her. but... it's not her fault we never set a time. but tbh she didn't even show up until after deadline. jay and jordan said luke's name on call with me when we finished the challenge. we seemed to have a fun time on the call so maybe their telling the truth. we do have our 4 person alliance with lexi so maybe that will save us.... also where this idol @ sis

this vote is gonna be between lexi and luke and honestly some how i hope i go home. pull the trigger

Thank god, we had won. Otherwise I think I would have been going home. Bad luck comes in threes, right

Wow so we won again.. Iconic!! So hoping we don't swap any time soon basicallly. Not doing much strategic gameplay other than staying social with my 4 and still talking to those outside of it. Us not going to tribal kind of makes my strategic options stagnant or at least they do to me lol

Okay so I'm pretty obsessed with ulta. I like that everyone for the most part is around and participating in chats and challenges. We all seem to gel really well. So far I think I'm the closest with Katie. We've bonded over how challenging these games are for old people like us with full time jobs. We're thinking of recruiting charlotte for an official 3 old people alliance. Then she can pick a 4th. If I had my way, our 4th would be Carson because I'm also pretty close with him and chat with him a lot. Okay I'll post another one of these later tonight

WE WON IMMUNITY! I'm so happy just because i've been stressing not only about this game, or any other game, but life itself. It's a BLEH. But to be immune for tonight, and knowing that an upcoming swap is likely, is kind of great. I'm hoping if so, the swap ends up in my favour. Nonetheless, I am going to try to use that time (or, if no swap, the time still) to enhance my social connections with various people. I feel great with Carson (as everyone likely does...) and okay with a few others, like Willow and Bryce and... personally, even Charlotte. I spoke to Charlotte tbh about what happened, and although we couldn't go in full depth about it, I wanted to justify and apologize for what happened, and I tried to make it clear that I wasn't going to relate the two games, and she said she wouldn't either. Is that likely? Maybe not. I will respect her decision though. ARGH GO ULTA TEAM WOO

So I'm telling Jordan and Jay about my idol because I really think it's going to help us in the upcoming vote. Right now as it stands, Ryan and Lexi are going to be voting for me and Jay/Jordan and myself would be voting for Ryan. However, that would leave one very pissed off and lonely Lexi without an ally. If we swapped or merged then Lexi would without a doubt flip on us and we would be screwed. If I tell Jordan and Jay to vote me out along with Ryan and Lexi, I idol myself and vote out Ryan, Lexi will believe that Jordan and Jay never flipped on her and will still trust them. If we end up swapping/merging then Lexi will still trust Jordan and Jay and we have a number moving forward where we wouldn't if they straight up flipped on Lexi. I hope...I don't get screwed :)

What a suprise we lost.... again. This round is going to be interesting for sure. I think im safe but hoenstly who knows. Ryan is getting blindsided tonight in an unconventional way. We are all voting luke, luke is playing his idol... bye bye ryan. Should be fun

I've been tired and haven't put much into challenges and talked to much people bc I suck

And I need a 2nd confessional

This is the first org I've ever played where I'm like "everything seems to be going too well" so I'm probably gonna get killed as soon as merge happens. Until then, I'm enjoying the high of my tribe winning everything except one challenge

haha I outlasted adam.. yes this is old news but it still feels good!

I wasnt around for the challenge but it feel great to win again

youtube

Our tribe doesn't really talk much unless we have a challenge due. Life at Ulta is boring today. I went hunting for treasure and all I found was a seashell. It was a sad day.

#NotAGameForLapdogs

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