#the whole premise of the album is so fucking emotional and uncomfortable but somehow beautiful
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i think everyone should listen to in the aeroplane over the sea at least once in their life.
#fair warning i am about to ramble so unintelligently#idk where i read it but the whole story of being able to hear jeff mangum walk away at the end of two headed boy part two and then from#that point on he was just. never the same#like he had a nervous breakdown after recording the album and they never released anything else and he fell off the face of the earth for#a while#the whole premise of the album is so fucking emotional and uncomfortable but somehow beautiful#ik its like a cliche indie music thing at this point but wow i think its one of the best albums ever lol#i guess haunting is a good word for it#because its uncomfortable to listen to for a few reasons#like the subject matter#and also how piercing jeffs voice is#at some points its just painful to listen to because even though his voice isnt good you can hear everything inside of him breaking#i wrote an essay on this in like 11th grade but idk where it is lol and im sure it wasnt good#raw is kind of an overused word to describe music but fuck this album really is just that. raw and painful and uncomfortable#if jeff mangum had a more conventional voice i dont think the album would have the same impact it does#the album probably wasnt recorded in order but it feels like it was recorded in one continous session from start to finish#and you can kind of jeffs voice shift from start to finish it just sounds more and more desperate and almost#unhinged? not the word im looking for but it fits#fuck i had to pause the album holland 1945 came on and i want to finish typing this lol#like i know mcr has a ton of 'mythology' surrounding the history of the members and thats one of my favorite things about them#and nmh has that same kind of mystery about them too#but in a different way#im struggling to put this into words but the way neutral milk hotel kind of just. stopped bc of jeff's mental health leaving fans with#no closure makes me think of what would have happened if gerard died in 2004 after revenge#maybe i am looking way too deep into this bc im supposed to be doing homework but#and then the whole idea of having no closure#gerards 'its not a band its an idea' comment and the whole breakup provided no closure in my opinion (and now i see why but irrelevant) and#idk if that was on purpose. and jeff mangum didnt want to officially break up nmh right after becoming famous even though he could not#handle it#and it reminds me of the mcr breakup in that people viewed it as selfish and they hadthis whole idealized version of jeff in their heads
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Please carry on the au where peter is a quickly rising pop star and tony is an international music legend!!!! I'm addicted to it!
Oof, it wasn't me who started that (I just reblogged it on account of I liked it too) but I figure what the hell, I’ll write a little thing with the same premise! This is more preslash than anything, but um. Hope you like it!
*
Sometimes Peter hates the lights, the yelling, all the flashing from the cameras but he also knows that this is what he gets stuck dealing with if he wants to have a music career and hey, it could be worse. He’s seen the way some other people in the music industry get treated and he knows he’s lucky that he got a decent manager, and his family- which really only consists of May- is supportive, and so are his friends. So if he has to deal with all the lights and cameras and people he can do that for until he can safely retreat to his hotel room and crash there for awhile before doing it all over again.
Its a lot though and sometimes Peter wishes he could take a step back from the public, take time for himself but that’s impossible when your face is all over billboards. Which is probably why he finds himself at the bar to begin with and its mostly industry people here so he doesn’t need to worry about anyone riding his ass about image. Yeah, he gets it, thirteen year olds love him but it does seem weird that somehow he ended up people’s role model rather than like... literally anyone else. The fans themselves though, they’re nice, its just their parents suck sometimes.
“And here I thought you pop stars were on short leashes. Who let you out to play?” someone asks and Peter swears to god he knows that voice but there’s no way. He turns, pretty much hoping in equal parts that he’s right and wrong and when he turns out to be right he isn’t sure what he feels.
“Um. I mean, compared to you rock stars a drink really isn’t something to worry about, is it?” he asks and oh man he can’t believe he said that with that much confidence when he’s talking to Tony Stark. Tony fucking Stark, rock star legend, basically killed his career and revived it like five times. Split his band and managed to come back. Joined another and managed to rocket them into a level of fame that was even bigger than his last band. Has so many awards he probably has a room dedicated to them and only them. And that doesn’t even touch on the potential biopic Peter has heard rumors about. Ned called him at four in the morning about it because they’ve both had a crush on Tony Stark for basically as long as they’ve been alive.
Tony laughs, shaking his head. “I guess not, but pop stars tend to be all image, no substance. Kind of puts a damper on things if you ruin the image,” he points out.
Peter would like to prickle at that but he’s still in shock that Tony Stark is talking to him. “Is that what you think of my music?” he asks, raising an eyebrow and he just said that? With his mouth? Jesus Christ where is he getting this confidence?
“Not the songs that you wrote, no. But god help me if I have to hear any one of your catchy, irritating love songs on the radio, no offense,” he says.
“Be glad you don’t have to sing them,” Peter tells him because even he’s sick of them, not that he wrote them. He writes some of his stuff, but never the singles and wait, did Tony just compliment songs he wrote like he did enough research to know he wrote them? “Wait, how do you know which songs are mine?” he asks.
Tony snorts, “one, they aren’t garbage. Two, there’s real emotional substance. Sorry about your uncle,” he says, tone a little softer there and Peter sighs.
“Yeah. I had a long fight to get that on the album and people were surprised that it made charts.” Its slow, sad. Peter had written it on the anniversary of his death the year before and it made May cry.
“That doesn’t surprise me. That shit is why I avoid pop like the plague, no offense. But know I will absolutely be offended if you think rock is just as bad,” he says, lips quirking up a bit.
Peter lets out a breathy laugh. “Uh, no. I love your music, like really love your music. I’ve been listening to it for like... ever. I lost my virginity to your Man in Black album, I can’t believe I said that I’m going to go kill myself now,” he says, lifting his hand to cover his face as Tony barks out a laugh.
“Knew it had to happen at some point. Congrats on keeping your cool for that long. Believe it or not that isn’t the strangest thing I’ve had a fan say,” he says and Peter laughs.
“Oh I know, fans say some weird shit. I’ve had soccer moms say some um... not family friendly things to me in front of their children. They can get weird. I’m sorry I got weird, I hate when people get weird,” he says. Its always a little uncomfortable and he’s had to learn how to handle people being creepy at him. Liz gave him lessons given that she deals with it all the time being a beautiful woman. Peter never really thought he’d have to deal with that kind of thing but people treat celebrities different.
Tony shrugs, probably used to a lot worse than what Peter deals with. His fanbase is mostly teenagers and while they do regularly call him ‘daddy’ on Twitter it can’t be anything like Tony’s fanbase, which is like a billion times larger and consists of people from every age group and country. He doesn’t know how he’d handle that level of fame.
“So, are you actually all that wholesome shit they push or do you actually have a personality in there? Because your music, your music, suggests you aren’t really the America’s sweetheart kind of guy,” Tony says, head tilted to the side.
Peter shrugs, “I mean most of its true. Internet age makes it hard to lie when fans will literally show up at the hospital you were born at to find out what time, specifically, you were born at. But I wish I didn’t get stuck in pop music. Its not bad I guess but have you ever heard Bo Burnham’s Repeat Stuff, the comedy song he did making fun of pop? I feel that sometimes. Its all repeat stuff, repeat stuff, repeat stuff and it gets a little exhausting. That’s what I’ve got though, so,” he shrugs.
“Word of advice, Peter, if you want to do what you want to do you’re going to have to fight for it. Managers and execs will fuck your face if you let them. They want to talk market and research and song length and workable study tested formulas but that ignores all the shit that suggests people will listen to whatever the hell you hand them if they like it. If you don’t fight back you’ll get stuck in that shit forever,” Tony tells him.
“Hmm. Guess you’d know, your whole career is pretty much yelling ‘fuck it’ and doing whatever you want.” Maybe a little too much of that if he counts the long period of alcoholism and drug use but he got clean years ago and once again somehow managed to revive his career.
Tony winces, apparently thinking the same thing. “Yeah, don’t do anything I would do. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do either. There’s a grey area, operate in there,” he says and Peter laughs.
“Okay, alright. Question though, if you hate pop so much how come you came over here to talk to me?” he asks. Because he’s kind of curious and the star struck feeling is fading.
“Your hot,” Tony says bluntly and Peter almost chokes on his air supply. “Don’t look so shocked, if pop knows how to do anything they know how to pick them pretty. Besides, you’re not the worst pop artist I’ve ever heard, you actually have talent, and Quill told me you were too wholesome to give me your number,” he says, nodding across the bar to holy fuck Peter actual Quill, who is looking pretty damn shocked right now.
“Oh, I’ll give you more than my number,” he says, wincing because he totally didn’t mean to say that out loud.
Tony grins though, “I knew you weren’t as wholesome as your image made you out to be,” he says, looking amused.
“Oh come on, can you blame them? Do I look like a rock star to you?” Peter says. They both know he looks like he could be a member of One Direction and that doesn’t really jive with the rock star image. He’s just glad he didn’t get jammed into country music. He would have quit on the spot, he refuses to sing about trucks and dirt roads. At least love songs are kind of sweet.
Tony looks him up and down and Peter is pretty sure he turns red in response. “I can work with that,” he says, grinning.
*
Ned calls him in the morning screaming and he lets him get it all out before trying to calm him down. “Oh my god you met Tony Stark!” he screams. MJ and Liz appear in the background and lean forward, lurking for answers.
Peter shrugs, “I mean yeah, we met,” he says coyly.
“Don’t make me pry the details out of you Parker,” MJ tells him. “You were wearing his jacket in the picture and I’m ninety percent sure you took it in a bed. Explain yourself.”
“I maybe got a bit of a rockstar makeover,” he says, shrugging like its no big deal. It so is and he wants to gush so bad but Tony is a person, not someone to brag about so he doesn’t. He wouldn’t like it if someone did that with him but also he’s losing his shit a little on the inside.
“A rock sta- oh my god are you still with him?” MJ asks, losing composure for half a second before she pulls her cool aloof look back together again.
“Hey guys. What do you think Twitter would do if I announced a collab?” he asks, appearing behind Peter and wrapping an arm around him. Ned faints, MJ’s eyebrows shoot up, and Liz leans into the camera hard.
“I love you,” she says, wincing and then pulling away. “I can’t believe I just said that. I’m going to go die now,” she says, scurrying off.
MJ points the camera at still passed out Ned. “Pretty sure that’s what Twitter would do,” she says and Tony laughs.
“He’s still alive, right?” he asks right as Ned wakes up.
“Oh my god I had the craziest dream,” he says.
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