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birlcholtz · 4 years

Note

any bittyholtz headcanons👀

holster knows he’s big ok? and he realizes pretty quick his sophomore year that bitty is Not Great at handling large guys coming at him quickly. so out of consideration for this tiny frosh, who is cute but holster can also tell is scared shitless by ransom and holster being their loud selves, holster tries to be conscious of bitty and respect his space (and also not yell too much around him because who knows what specifically bothers him)

and the great thing about ransom and holster being best bros for so long is that holster doesn’t have to explain what he’s doing to ransom, ransom just kind of matches him and that’s that

and holster is delighted every time bitty opens up a bit more and relaxes a bit more around the team, and when he comes out to ransom and holster holster internally is like oh. oh of COURSE. of course big loud jocks who talk about hooking up with women all the time and check people really hard on the ice bother him. duh holster

but holster would NEVER hurt someone for being gay that’s a huge asshole move and he feels it is Very Important That Bitty Knows That Holster Would Never Hurt Him. why does he feel it’s so important?? that’s a question for later holster isn’t a whole ‘analyze my feelings’ dude

so holster actively makes an effort to be around bitty in a non-threatening way. by a couple of months into spring semester they’re very comfortable around each other, comfortable enough that bitty jokes about their size difference and at one point he literally jumps into holster’s arms (who catches him on instinct) and then holster is like oh my god i’m holding bitty. oh my god he’s so small but so muscular. oh my god his hair smells so nice oh god oh fUCK

there is literally so much more under the cut. (send me ur headcanons for rarepairs/qpps!)

bitty, for his part, was initially very wary of ransom and holster for exactly the reasons holster figured out. it also doesn’t help that ransom dresses like a preppy frat bro and holster dresses like a messy frat bro. they’re both frat bros and bitty takes a long time to warm up to them.

but what does help is the way holster always lets bitty know he’s there before he gets too close (sometimes bitty is in the zone in the kitchen and doesn’t notice things like his teammates entering), and the way he doesn’t friendly-punch bitty like he does ransom. or jack. or shitty. or even lardo honestly nobody’s safe. except bitty is.

holster is also definitely responsible for putting some of bitty’s favorite songs on the kegster playlist and bitty definitely finds out and his heart warms a little more

and once bitty’s come out to ransom and holster and they don’t treat him any differently or weirdly and still profess their love for him when he bakes things without a single no homo, bitty finds himself hanging around with them a little more?

ransom likes to study in the attic without distractions so that means that bitty and holster wind up spending a lot more time together and listen. bitty can’t spend that much time with holster without noticing that the guy is a) extremely tall b) ripped and c) has an excellent jawline. and bitty is only human y’all

when he plays music in the kitchen holster will always dance (and sing along if he knows the words, or enough of the words to get them wrong in a funny way because bitty’s laugh sounds like angels singing and okay yeah holster is smitten)

holster Cannot make pies because he cannot touch pastry, bitty forbids him from trying before he even asks because his hands are too warm and he’ll fuck it all up. (holster, internally, is pleased bitty’s noticed. bitty, internally, is like fuck was that too weird) BUT if holster is in there he usually gets dragged into stirring things or chopping things or handing bitty sticks of butter from the fridge and basically whatever he can do without fucking up the pastry

and a while after that holster is like hang on wait it’s been a while since i realized i had a crush on bitty and it has Not gone away should i like. i don’t know. fucking tell him i’m into guys or something like that?? that would be smart

this is more how they get together than a list of headcanons LMAO i always get distracted and this is so fucking long omg

so he’s like rans. how do i do this. and ransom is like you should blast gettin’ bi from crazy ex girlfriend and holster is like weird. i love it.

other things holster does to subtly let bitty know he’s bi: loudly discuss his plans for going to pride that summer, make a lot of bi puns and hope one of them lands, show bitty funny posts from the lgbtq+ samwell student group on facebook

eventually bitty is like . hm. holster is either a VERY supportive ally. or he is trying to tell me something. and after the 80th bi meme post from the facebook group he’s like holster. hon. are you trying to tell me something

and holster is like YES. I AM BISEXUAL and bitty’s like oh that’s great!! (internally: can i climb him like a tree yet)

and then bitty’s like well thanks for telling me! and holster is like uh yeah! (because listen he’s good at wheeling but he is SO bad at wheeling bitty because this isn’t just someone cute he found at a kegster u know??? it’s BITTY and holster kind of wants to sweep him off his feet but in like. a gentlemanly way that won’t scare him)

when holster relates this interaction to ransom ransom is like oh my fucking god holster you could have told him and holster is like yeah and i did not for some fucking reason???????? ransom. i’m dumb and ransom is like no you just caught feelings

(bitty, to shitty: hey so uh. if a guy aggressively hints he’s into guys for like. a month. and then when i ask him straight out he tells me he’s bi. what does that mean. and shitty’s like i mean i wouldn’t know unless i know the guy?? but i wouldn’t ask u to tell me bc like. hes gotta choose who he’s out to u know and bitty’s like yeah i mean u know him but maybe i’ll ask him who else he’s out to bc i need some advice and shitty is like hell yeah)

the next day, bitty’s like holster are u out to anyone else?? just bc the team seems kinda. hetero. except for me. and holster is like oh yeah rans knows and shitty knows. also johnson. and jack if he’s not stupid because i’ve definitely had guys stay over. but mostly just the guys in the haus yeah

then they go to murder stop ‘n shop and buy baking ingredients. holster carries a metric fuck ton of flour and butter and pretends he doesn’t notice bitty staring at his arms (but he might flex just a little more than necessary)

so bitty’s like EXCELLENT. and then he talks to shitty again and is like IT’S HOLSTER AND I’M SUPER INTO HIM WHAT DO I DO and shitty’s like hooooo boy. and then HE’S like well uh. holster doesn’t like. feel the need to formally come out to people usually like the way he told me was by just telling me about a guy he hooked up with last year with zero context or warning? like i don’t know holster as well as, like, rans, but he definitely wants you specifically to know that he’s bi.

and bitty’s like intriguing. i’m gonna go combust now. and shitty’s like cool catch ya later.

so then bitty decides there’s only one way to find out if holster’s into him. and it’s not asking him, what the fuck?? no obviously not. it’s wearing very short shorts and touching him a lot and watching him to see if he blushes or gets flustered. bitty may not be a blunt or forthright person when it comes to hitting on people but he can at least make it impossible for holster to try and hide any feelings he may or may not have.

so rip holster is what i’m saying. but he also observes how much bitty is still watching him-- usually when bitty is doing something like wearing very short shorts or dancing at a kegster or flinging himself into holster’s lap-- and he’s like HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM. because also holster is like way more experienced with like. relationships in general? like he’s familiar with what someone flirting with him looks like. so he’s like alright well if bitty wants to make me suffer i’m going to make him suffer too. (’rans can i borrow your skinny jeans’ ‘is this so you can get back at bitty’ ‘yes it’s important’ ‘yeah sure whatever’)

holster knows he’s jacked, he just has to make sure bitty knows it. he also knows that bitty is comfortable with holster standing pretty close to him now so he’s going to use that to his advantage since holster is also tall as Fuck. (obviously he doesn’t do anything creepy like stand right behind him or smth but like. if they’re talking. holster is gonna get just a little in bitty’s space just so bitty has to look up at him a little. is this partially because bitty has really nice eyelashes? yeah)

basically what i’m saying is once holster decides to get back at bitty all hell breaks loose. literally nobody else in the haus can deal with the sexual tension when they’re in the same room. bitty is now pretty sure that holster is into him. shitty texts bitty saying ‘can you please bone for the love of god’. for good measure shitty also texts holster saying the same thing. he’s so tired but also this is hilarious

like it gets EXTRA. bitty and holster can both bend and snap and they DO. holster intentionally spills water on his t-shirt to make it cling more. when he sits at the kitchen table doing work bitty comes by and leans over his shoulder to see what he’s doing and if he brushes holster’s neck a little as he does it, well, that’s between them. at one point holster and bitty are both standing at the counter washing dishes and holster starts chirping bitty about not being able to reach the top shelf and asks if he wants to stand on a chair and bitty’s like hmm or you could just carry me. and holster almost has a conniption and it gets even worse when they finish washing up and bitty’s like oh great the counter’s all cleared off! and hops up and sits on it and that gets his face a little closer, vertically, to holster, who is suddenly aware that bitty is wearing very short shorts AGAIN, which like, seem to have become his uniform, and that when bitty sits like that holster can barely see those shorts, that’s how tiny they are, and it looks like bitty’s just sitting there in a shirt and nothing else and holster’s brain supplies a LOT of images once he thinks of that and hoo boy.

and holster’s like how can i get back at him. and bitty’s sitting right next to the hanging cabinets so holster grabs some of the plates from the drying rack that look dry enough and goes and stands *right* in front of bitty. like he’s not actually brushing bitty’s legs where they dangle off the counter but if he stepped forward like. half an inch. he would be. and they make eye contact for a second and then, without moving, holster starts putting plates away.

and bitty is like oh my fucking god WHAT else do i have to do (he doesn’t say this out loud) and then when holster’s done putting away the plates and it looks like he’s going to go grab more bitty just. wraps his legs around holster’s waist and pulls him in (and holster is like holy FUCK because he knew bitty’s legs were strong but not THAT STRONG HOLY SHIT) and at this point there’s really nothing else for them to do but make out at the kitchen counter and that’s what they do. (bitty does, in fact, climb that man like a tree)

okay so some actual headcanons lol. you thought you knew bitty was a clothes stealing fiend?? you were wrong. he absolutely is but you just didn’t know how much. does holster still have literally any of his sweatshirts? probably not honestly

the only way bitty will sit on the green couch will be if holster is sitting on the green couch and bitty is sitting in his lap because that way he can avoid any actual contact with the couch

when bitty makes anything with blueberries in it holster steals some but he also feeds bitty some because he’s mushy like that

they continue to go to extreme lengths to try and get each other flustered in public. shitty is so tired.

they share playlists constantly and even more of bitty’s favorites find their way onto the kegster playlist

when bitty moves into the haus holster is in his room c o n s t a n t l y. he just likes the space ok??? there’s lil reminders of bitty everywhere and of course if bitty is there too then that’s just the BEST

the puck bunny halloween costume physically murders adam birkholtz

#bittyholtz #fun with rarepairs #omgcp

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loucifieri · 6 years

Text

To Hell and Back (v3 HPA AU)

[Part 1]

It’s a bigger hot mess than the previous one lol

04/21/18 09:21PM

ShirogaNYEH: welcome back! previously, Akamatsu-san creates a group chat, Ouma-kun uses it to stir some shit and in the end, a subtle confession was made!

starlord: shirogane what the heck weve been chatting continuously

Maki Roll: yeah what are you even going on about

ShirogaNYEH: but it's not the same case with the audience

starlord: what audience??

Lord Panta: can we go back to my moment

chaotic lesbean: no go away

Lord Panta: ANYWAY

Lord Panta: is it true Saihara-chan??

Lord Panta: do you find me irresistible?

The Only Hope For Me Is You: I wouldn't use that adjective but yeah

The Only Hope For Me Is You: you're hard to ignore

Lord Panta: !!!!!!

The Only Hope For Me Is You: since you constantly demand attention

The Only Hope For Me Is You: You're like an annoying itch that just won't go away

starlord: ooooh SHOT DOWN

Treblemaker: Damn Shuichi-kun, didn't think you would be a harsh heartbreaker

Do You Believe In Magic: lol rip........

Maki Roll: good job saihara

Lord Panta: I

Lord Panta: …

Lord Panta: that's hot

dumb blonde slut: haha the purple twink is obviously a bottom

Lord Panta: bitch it takes one to know one :)

dumb blonde slut: eek n-no im not

starlord: he didnt even deny it

Robot Rights Activist: I backlogged and I seem to recall you express dissatisfaction over your assigned nickname, Iruma-san

Robot Rights Activist: Why haven't you changed it yet?

Lord Panta: coz she actually likes it, duh

dumb blonde slut: piss off cockichi

dumb blonde slut: awww kibs ur concerned!! i always knew u were in love with me

Robot Rights Activist: I do not.

Treblemaker: yeouch

starlord: so many crushed hearts tonite

Lord Panta: EAT SHIT AND DIE DUMB BLONDE SLUT

Treblemaker: Hey! No attacking!

Imma meme: you literally attacked me moments ago smh

Kork: This is a mess.

dumb blonde slut: dont get ur panties in a twist, idiot virgins

dumb blonde slut: the great iruma miu is too gorgeous 2 be affected by this shit

dumb blonde slut: im hella gay anyway

chaotic lesbean: you go Iruma-san!!

Robot Rights Activist: Still, I apologize if I came across as rude in any way! It was not my intention.

dumb blonde slut: dont beat urself too much over it kibs

Treblemaker: Aww Iruma-san really has a soft spot for Idabashi-kun

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Uh, Kaede-san, I assume you have your headphones on because I've been knocking on your door for awhile now and you haven't shifted from your position to indicate that you will answer the door.

ShirogaNYEH: truly a detective,,,

Treblemaker: oh shit sorry!!

chaotic lesbean: AND WHAT IS A DEGENERATE LIKE YOU DOING IN THE FEMALE AREA OF THE DORM THIS LATE AT NIGHT

Treblemaker: It's fine Chabashira-san!! Shuichi-kun usually comes over so we can gossip or whatever

chaotic lesbean: WHAT??? USUALLY??????

Maki Roll: wow Saihara, you managed to sneak past chabashira several times already, im impressed

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Thank you Harukawa-san! I feel validated.

Lord Panta: is there really NOTHING going on between you two

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Kaede-san is my bestfriend??

Treblemaker: Yeah, why does that bother you so much Ouma-kun?

Kork: He likely feels envious of your relationship.

Lord Panta: lol no

starlord: sure jan

Lord Panta: quick question what are yall sexual orientations

imma meme: im fabulously gay

chaotic lesbean: isn't it obvious

dumb blonde slut: dont have 2 repeat myself

Do You Believe In Magic: ace...... sexual attraction is tiring.........

ShirogaNYEH: same!!

Kork: as am I.

Treblemaker: Actually, I'm Bi but I tend to prefer girls

starlord: well since were being honest ok im bi too

Maki Roll: same

Gokuhara Gonta: Gonta loves all!! And Hoshi-kun says he's Ace!

Treblemaker: Gonta-kun, it's getting really late. You and Hoshi-kun should start heading back here.

Gokuhara Gonta: Of course, Akamatsu-san!

Imma meme: spoken like another mom

Treblemaker: >:(

Robot Rights Activist: My attraction is not affected by one's sexual orientation

bitch I am the WAY: Angie is pan!~

The Only Hope For Me Is You: I'm gay

Lord Panta: YES!!!!

Maki Roll: wow he was not subtle AT ALL

Treblemaker: What about you @Mother Knows Best?

imma meme: why do you want to know (͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)

Treblemaker: It wouldn't be fair to leave out someone from a question addressed to everyone!

Treblemaker: also, another word amami and im bashing your head with a shot put ball

ShirogaNYEH: go get em Akamatsu-san!

imma meme: im having war flashbacks

Mother Knows Best: Thank you for your consideration, Akamatsu-san. Apologies for not replying the soonest as I had to attend to some last minute errands. To answer your query, my preference is of the same sex.

Lord Panta: okay cool thank you for your input everyone!!!

Maki Roll: you only wanted to know one person's tho

dumb blonde slut: how about bull balls what do u think his orientation is

starlord: are you referring to great gozu??

dumb blonde slut: yea dumbass

dumb blonde slut: oh fuck those huge man tits,,,

dumb blonde slut: annsd heds a wretslerr he g ets all sewaTYyna d

chaotic lesbean: OK TENKO HAS HEARD ENOUGH

Maki Roll: Iruma shut the fuck up

bitch I am the WAY: Angie hears moaning again and it is very disturbing~~

Treblemaker: To think our rooms are billed as soundproof...

The Only Hope For Me Is You: I am effectively traumatized tonight.

ShirogaNYEH: we need to take this up with the headmaster!!

imma meme: uhhh its kinda weird to explain how we discovered the walls arent entirely soundproof

imma meme: “our classmate was masturbating too loudly to thoughts about our homeroom teacher's man boobs”

Kork: Let us not prolong this discussion. Can someone take care of that horrid excuse of a human being.

bitch I am the WAY: oh, she has stopped

bitch I am the WAY: Ah, Angie hears loud noises of struggle

bitch I am the WAY: then some shuffling outside the hallway

bitch I am the WAY: it is dead quiet now

chaotic lesbean: what just happened

chaotic lesbean: Tenko was terrified to peek outside

Treblemaker: Harukawa-san we talked about this

Maki Roll: what? I didn't kill her

Hoshi Ryoma: yo

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Hello Hoshi-kun

Hoshi Ryoma: just got back in the dorm with gokuhara

Hoshi Ryoma: he want back to his room but

Hoshi Ryoma: im still in the lounge room rn

Hoshi Ryoma: im seein tojo with a gagged and immobile iruma wrapped in a blanket being dragged across the room to the front door

Hoshi Ryoma: tojo just dumped her out

Lord Panta: NISHISHISHI PUNISHMENT TIME

chaotic lesbean: :O

imma meme: what an ICON

Treblemaker: woah thats hot

bitch I am the WAY: she is doing Atua's work~~

Mother Knows Best: I was merely disposing of the trash.

Do You Believe In Magic: …..tnx mom........

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Best mom!

starlord: shouldn't that include ouma tho

Lord Panta: suck my dick spaceman

Robot Rights Activist: Language!

Lord Panta: da hell keeboy it wasnt even that crass

Gokuhara Gonta: Oh no! What has been going on here, friends?

chaotic lesbean: NOTHING! PLEASE CARRY ON WITH YOUR NORMAL NIGHTLY ROUTINE

starlord: hey gonta, buddy, do me a favor and dont backlog

Gokuhara Gonta: Alright, Momota-kun!

ShirogaNYEH: Gonta-kun should not be tainted in any way!!

ShirogaNYEH: we should probably let Iruma-san inside now though

Lord Panta: are you in league with the DEVOL

Maki Roll: not like you're any better

Mother Knows Best: Very well. I suppose she has learned her lesson, at least for this moment.

Imma meme: well this was wild

Treblemaker: Let's not talk about this ever again

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Group chats tend to spiral down into levels of insanity the longer we spend time in it

Kork: Might I suggest a more... family-friendly topic?

Treblemaker: What is it, Shinguji-kun?

Kork: Ghosts in Hope's Peak

starlord: FUCK NO

bitch I am the WAY: hmmm what about nicknames for Gonta and Ryoma!~

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Good idea, Angie-san

Gokuhara Gonta: Oh yes! Gonta is excited on what name friends will gift him!

Imma meme: okay we better not fuck this up then

Lord Panta: allow me~

Maki Roll removed Lord Panta from the chat

starlord: lol sniped again

imma meme: DEADT

chaotic lesbean: noone must ruin this special moment!!

Do You Believe In Magic changed Gokuhara Gonta to Good Noodle

imma meme: yumeno-san is our name-changing cryptid

Good Noodle: Thank you Yumeno-san! Gonta loves this nickname!

ShirogaNYEH: im,,, CRYING

chaotic lesbean: you're doing amazing, sweetie

Do You Believe In Magic changed Hoshi Ryoma to quail egg

ShirogaNYEH: s m o l b e a n

quail egg: NO

imma meme: hoshi-kun can literally punt us to the sun let's not baby him

starlord: not to mention that hes got a deeper voice than the rest of us guys

starlord: its so manly

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Momota-kun, your gay is showing

Treblemaker: Yay! Now everyone's got a nickname.

Treblemaker: We should probably add Ouma-kun back here.

quail egg: respectfully disagree

chaotic lesbean: you are too nice akamatsu-san!!!

ShirogaNYEH: funny how we somehow end up kicking Ouma-kun out the chat then add him later towards the end of the chapter...

starlord: ????

Treblemaker added Lord Panta to the chat.

Do You Believe In Magic changed Lord Panta to notto disu shitto agen

notto disu shitto again: i feel loved

dumb blonde slut: THE GREAT IRUMA MIU IS BACK YA DUMB VIRGINS

Maki Roll: fuck go back

Kork: This is the 10th Circle of Hell.

Mother Knows Best: I would like to inform everyone that the time is now five minutes past eleven in the evening. I believe this is the ideal time for all of us to get some rest as we have a class on Physical Education early morning.

Imma meme: omg I hate PE

notto disu shitto agen: but moooooom

Mother Knows Best: All of you go to sleep or I will not make breakfast for everyone tomorrow.

notto disu shitto agen: okay okay jeez

dumb blonde slut: yes mommy

starlord: aight mom

bitch I am the WAY: Apparently, Angie must postpone here sacrificial ritual tonight~~

ShirogaNYEH: awww I wont binge watch anime tonight then

Do You Believe In Magic: ….....good nyt...................

chaotic lesbean: Sleep well yumeno-chan <3

Do You Believe In Magic: …...........nyeh <3

Good Noodle: Goodnight everyone!

quail egg: night

dumb blonde slut: nyt cocksuckers

The Only Hope For Me Is You: Good night, all!

notto disu shitto agen: hey saihara-chan are you back at your room can i come over :v

The Only Hope For Me Is You: nah I'm sleeping over Kaede-san's tonight

notto disu shitto agen: WHAT

chaotic lesbean: WHAT

Mother Knows Best: Saihara-san, I am afraid I will have to escort you out. Now.

Imma meme: oof

nickname guide notto disu shitto agen: Ouma The Only Hope For Me Is You: Saihara Treblemaker: Akamatsu bitch I am the WAY: Yonaga starlord: momota shirogaNYEH: shirogane Mother Knows Best: tojo imma meme: amami Maki Roll: harukawa Do You Believe In Magic: yumeno chaotic lesbean: chabashira Kork: shinguji Robot Rights Activist: idabashi dumb blonde slut: iruma Good Noodle: gokuhara quail egg: hoshi

NDRV3 HPA AU Character Design Masterlist here and background information here [Facebook] [Instagram] [Twitter] [Blogger] [Kofi]

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pikapegasus · 6 years

Note

"tell me" with peraltiago for the prompt meme!

rip another super old prompt but that wedding last night got me #hyped let’s goooo

anyway, tw for mentions of biphobia/homophobia ahead. hope u guys enjoy!!!

Amy will always remember the day Jake came out to her.

It’d been hot on the heels of Rosa’s own coming out to thesquad, as he tried to help her navigate a complicated sea of emotions with herparents. He came home tired, stressed, and emotionally drained, plopping face downon the couch and groaning into the cushions with his feet in Amy’s lap.

When she finally goaded him into sitting up, they begantalking about other coming out horror stories they’d heard, about people theypersonally knew and people they’d never met before, about sexuality andexploration and questioning and then it just slipped out—

“Ames, I think…I think I’m also bi.”

Jake held his breath and watched her face carefully, so Amycupped his cheek with her hand and smiled, because she’d always had a feeling, and she held him close.

“Is that okay?” he asked, despite the clear message ofapproval in her body language, and her smile widened.

“Of course it is,” she said. “It’s who you are. And I love who you are.”

“I love you, too,” he said, and they kissed, triggering boththe familiar electricity to course through her veins and a new cloud ofuncertainty to hang over her head.

Amy will always remember the day Jake came out to her,because it’s the day she came back out to herself.

It had all started in high school with, surprise, a kiss.

She’d kissed boys before. She’d done…other things with boysbefore.

But there she stood, in the girls’ bathroom during lunch,being kissed by a friend who’d come out to her one week prior and admitted herfeelings for Amy a day prior, and Amywasn’t sure what came over her, but it was, surprisingly, the same feeling thatcame over her when she’d kissed boys.

(She loved it.)

Relationships fizzle, and this one was no exception, but theeye-opening impact it’d left on Amy remained ever since.

And everything was fine until it wasn’t—until one of herolder brothers came out as gay and her parents forced him to go to Confessionand talk to the priest from their parish, because it wasn’t natural, it was sinful.

That’s when Amy learned noone could know.

So, like Jake, she learned to “repress the hell” out ofeverything, except rather than it being family trauma, it was herself.

Times have changed, though, as have people. Her parents havechanged their stances. Her brother is happily married to his collegesweetheart, and the two have adopted three beautiful children together.

But Amy can’t bring herself to change—to open that forbiddenbox in her mind back up and release the poor, innocent truth from its prison.

(Just the idea makes her heart stutter in her chest and herfingers shake, and she envies Rosa, for being able to tell so many others atonce without batting an eye, and Jake, for being able to tell her, the person he wants to marry.)

She attends the new and improved family game nights at Rosa’splace with Jake weekly, actively burying the box she’d locked her ownbisexuality up in years ago even furtherin her mind and throwing the key away into a deep, dark hole.

And one week, Jake decides to come out to everyone, only tobe greeted with warm hugs and support—and the label of “bi bros” by Charles,referring to Jake and Rosa.

“Ew,” Rosa says.

“To be fair,” Jake says, “that’s actually one of Charles’better name ideas.”

Amy watches on, biting her lip, wishing she could be one ofthe “bi bros,” too.

With their wedding rapidly approaching, Amy’s anxiety calmsever so slightly, because it’s become increasingly apparent as of late thatJake has no intentions of backing out or leaving—ever—even if this is who she really is.

Logically, it’s a stupid thing to fear, she knows, because he’s bi, he accepts Rosaas bi, he loves Amy, and wants thebest for her as she wants the best for him.

“Ames,” Jake says on the first day of May, just two weeksout from their wedding, “I know something’s been on your mind lately.”

“You mean our wedding that’s two weeks away and still has a tonof planning left to do?” she quips, adjusting her glasses.

He looks to the fat binder sitting on the dining tablebeneath her finger tips, then back to her. “That, and something else.”

She presses her lips together, her grip on her favoritehighlighter tightening ever so slightly, and he smiles.

“I’m just saying,” he says, “you can tell me when you’reready. No rush. Love ya.”

With that, he presses a kiss to her cheek, then returns tohis path out the front door, keys and wallet in hand, to pick up dinner.

When he’s gone, the words printed in the binder start toblur despite her glasses, and she puts the cap back on her highlighter and restsher forehead against her palm with a deep, shaky sigh.

Taking a page from Jake’s book, Amy starts practicing herwords in the privacy of the bathroom, reciting them to herself in the mirroruntil she can get the b-word out without shaking. Her gaze is intense and herlips are caught in a deep frown—an expression far too harsh for something thatshould be easy and comfortable to share with Jake, her soon-to-be husband.

But then life happens, and Jake has to finish all thewedding planning alone while she catches a long-lost perp with Rosa and theirwedding receives a bomb threat andthey get married outside the precinct,of all places.

The words she’s practiced slip her mind during the week-longwhirlwind, thankfully, but once she’s lying in bed with Jake as husband andwife for the first time ever, they hit her again like a train.

“I know we just lost a lot of money on our wedding, andNutriboom is still out to get me, but I think a staycation honeymoon won’t betoo bad, right?” Jake says, intertwining their legs together and curling intoher more closely. “We can still do all the stuff in the sex section of thewedding binder! With the cascading tabs!”

“Oh…I’m a little tired out from today,” she says gently.

“Yeah, same, I didn’t mean right now, I just meant over the course of our staycation honeymoon,” hesays, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Today turned out to be pretty good,after all.”

Finally, she sighs, because she feels bad. She’s trapped him now, the irrational part of her accuses,because she’s waited until after theygot married to tell him the truth.

“Jake, I have to tell you something.”

“I know, I know, my butt is the bomb.”

“Not that,” she amends, biting her lip, and he looks at hermore intently at that, concern in his gaze.

“Is this the thing that’s been on your mind lately?” heasks.

She nods.

“It’s okay,” he says. “I mean, unless it’s something that’snot okay. But it’s okay you haven’t told me yet. I trust you.”

“Thank you. Remember…” she murmurs slowly, hesitantly. “Rememberwhen Rosa came out as bi? And—and then you came out to me as bi?”

The word still feels sticky, forbidden, on her lips, but she forces herself to trudge throughand finish the job. Jake nods.

“I’m also bi,” she whispers, because any louder, someonecould hear, and she’s still not entirely sure she wants Jake to hear. “I—I have been for a long time, I mean, I’ve known for a long time, but…”

She trails off, waiting for that last possible shoe to dropon this relationship, this marriage,because even throughout the imperfections they’ve endured, it’s too good to Amy, and she still can’t believeit.

But Jake smiles, and cups her cheek with his hand—just asshe had done to him months prior—and she notices she’s holding her breath—just ashe had done.

“I love you, Ames,” he says. “Thanks for telling me.”

“It’s okay, right?” she can’t help but ask. “I mean, I knowit’s okay—I think it’s okay—but…Idon’t know.”

“It’s who you are,” he echoes her. “And you know I love who you are. We’re friggin’married now, babe!”

She smiles at that, feeling tears burn against the back ofher eyes again, and he presses a poorly aimed kiss to the bridge of her nose.

“I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t say it sooner,” hesays. “But, I feel like you should know that four-drink-Amy hinted at it a few times…”

“Don’t remind me.” She groans, but she’s never been happier,because she’s managed to accomplish twolife milestones in one day.

He gasps. “You and I are bi bros now!”

She groans again, but Jake peppers her face with morekisses, forcing her to giggle, and she will always remember today—the day shemarried the love of her life.

(And, now, the day Amy came out to Jake.)

#peraltiago #jake peralta #amy santiago #b99 #b99 spoilers #biphobia mention #homophobia mention #anyway i love bi jake and bi amy!!!! they are so valid!!!!#stooperman #fanfiction

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thetruthhive-blog · 6 years

Text

Copy of Copy of Your happiness is offensive

People are weird, and it seems like there is a subset of people who are only happy when they see others suffer.

It's a bit understandable, I mean, I'll listen to sad music to remind myself of how good I have it. We see something negative and think, well it could be worse. As long as it's a vicarious experience, I don't think there's an issue with that. But I had an interesting experience in which someone put their own views above someone else's happiness. Or at least that's how it seemed to me.

I was playing a show in Milford, Massachusetts, with my band (SunshineRiot.com), in what I like to call a dentist biker bar, where it's full of bikers, but many of them don't really lead the true biker lifestyle. Anyway, We were hanging out outside shooting the shit with some dude we kind of knew, I don't know his name so let's just call him Jerry. My friends go inside, and across the way there's a kid in tight ripped jeans, stick-thin and seemingly having the time of his life.

He could've been a goddamn Rockette. If we could bottle this dude's happiness we could make a mint. Jumping, dancing, high kicking, shaking that booty, just really enjoying himself with friends oblivious to everyone outside their immediate area. I almost got kicked a few times going in and out of the bar before when we were loading the gear in. Jerry on the other hand, was not pleased. He kept looking back and forth between me, his beer, his cigarette and Rockette Boy. He said to me “Man, I don't have a problem with gay guys, but I just wish they wouldn't be so flamboyant about it.”

This struck me. I hadn't heard that kind of attitude since high school, and I went to a Catholic high school. And I actually never found out if the kid was actually gay, bi, flamboyant, metro or whatever, that's not really the point.

It really hit me. I literally had my version of that face pictured above in that meme. I just said to him like, “No one's forcing you to watch this dude, dude.” And I walked away. But it bugged me enough that three weeks later I'm writing about it.

I kept an eye on both of them the rest of the night. Nothing happened, I just got a bad vibe, but the more I started thinking about it, the more it became analogous to schadenfreude, or the German word for taking pleasure in other people's pain.

I know people like that, where the only time they laugh is when it's for a prank or someone's fuckup. Or those nut-punch videos Tosh.0 and America's Funniest Home Videos show. Like, I know one or two people who have never laughed at a dad joke, a silly mask or any type of humor that didn't involve someone looking stupid or getting injured.

And I realized that the reason I was thinking of this is because schadenfreude works the other way too. In the same way that a sad song can make us feel good, seeing others having a good time that you don't understand can make you feel bad. Now we can't stop our feelings, if this guy was a homophobe, well, as long as he didn't hurt anybody or put someone down directly about it, I guess that his fucking problem and I shouldn't waste my time on it. But he tried to involve me in it, get me to agree, so I think he made it my problem, which is why it's been bugging me for so long.

Now Jerry probably just had that bit of male machoness that prevails in a lot of cultures. You've got to act as male as possible while constantly screaming at the top of your lungs, “But not in a gay way.” Jerry had a problem with this guy because he saw this kid having a great time, expressing himself in a way Jerry wasn't allowed to as a kid, I'm assuming, and I think he said to himself, “Why does he get away with it? That's not fair.” I mean that's the stereotypical story, so let's just go with that.

That one little bit of involving me though, the more I think about it the more I can see how easily a mob mentality can destroy people. Now I'm not saying people can help their feelings, positive or negative, but we can check our reactions and responses. I mean, I grew up in that same male culture Jerry did, and it was only in Freshman year of high school where I realized what an ass and idiot I was being.

But we can check our responses and how we deal with our feelings. If we can figure out where they come from we can choose to act appropriately on them, whether they are positive or negative.

Just something to think about.

I'm pulling for ya, we're all in this together.

-Red Green

#red green #happiness #milford Massachusetts #SunshineRiot.com #Rockette #rocket boy #opinion article

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