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#sorry to be sadposting... tumblr is the only place i can admit ive actually been really really struggling with my love for art...
moonlume
ยท
2 months
Text
tumblr said draw something bad so I did but I'm mad I still didn't feel anything
#man i started tagging this and i cant even bring myself to do it. hashtag art hashtag illustration hashtag capitalism.
#sorry to be sadposting... tumblr is the only place i can admit ive actually been really really struggling with my love for art...
#i should be grateful. i should be thankful for the fact that i can do art as my job. i shouldnt be whining about it like this.
#but theres a hole in my soul where my joy for creating used to be and i dont know how to fix it. i want to love to draw again.
#its been like this for probably over a year now and i dont know what to do. i cant abandon everything ive been working on for 7 years.
#im also unemployable. so its not like i would dare to quit moonlume...but i just want to find joy in it again...
#but capitalism has dug its wretched claws into my skull so badly that everything has been feeling incredibly soulless. i hate it.
#anyway. might delete this later. its unprofessional but this is the one website where i can let go of professionalism for 5min and be human.
#i dont hate what i do and i really am thankful..i just i wish i wasnt so stressed about making everything look good and perfect and sellable
#but at this point its subconsciously connected to my survival that every time i think about drawing i stress myself out before i even start
#ugh idk. neither here nor there. cant quit but dont feel connected to my work but cant change what i do or i will alienate my audience ๐
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