Something else that has been on our mind is the intersection between our ocs and our experience being a system. There's a few different aspects that this manifested for us, and it's just something we reflect on every once in a while.

For one thing, our ocs were a major coping mechanism growing up. I think for many reasons - it was a safe format to express and explore different individuals who weren't "me", and in retrospect too I think a lot of alters I'd see in dreams would get recycled for stories and ocs because alter dreams always felt more vivid and enrapturing than my more mundane dreams. Our experiences shaping and defining our identities via fictional constructs started early, and since it was an overwhelmingly positive payoff for us at the time the approach has stuck. (Fast forward to Now with our 100+ fictives from media... orz)

Of course, another aspect of coping is projection. And man... was there a lot more of that than I realized.

Of course, some of it was direct alter to oc projection/influence? Certain alters latched onto or created ocs for themselves to express themselves so in that sense, very straightforward. I remember a friend once commenting on how easily I slid 'into character' to quote a hypothetical scenario and his response to it, voice and intonation and all... we do in fact have an alter who took on that character and have seen him around in our brain since.

Some of it was less obvious, too... gender was toyed a lot with our ocs. We had a character who could switch between "the two" genders, and when he did so it was also a difference in persona... the character was like an onstage idol who irl was ofc drastically different, especially when presenting masculinely. Reflecting on that today, it occurred to me that could easily be interpreted not just as someone nonbinary or trans, but as someone who's plural. And it may be something I end up exploring when I revamp the character.

And then of course.... your standard good/evil personality stereotypes. There were Several blatantly obvious examples of that, and others that weren't so plain about it being "multiple personalities" but still clearly a duality was seen in the character, secret lifes, inner struggles, things of that nature.

Admittedly I picked up the good/evil tropes from media. One of my favorite manga series at the time had a case like that that I think about to this day- it wasn't a great case obviously, but it was coded in the split being a direct result of childhood trauma, and that character and her story stuck with me as a result. I strove to emulate it in a few of my most beloved ocs.

I don't think I portrayed it as good/evil just because of media tropes. That was definitely the limited scope I had to work with at the time. But for me, the internal struggle between distinct voices has always been somewhat painful for me, confusing, unknown. Traits oft associated to 'evil' entities. I battled with voices in my head I didn't even know existed, thinking that I was just being difficult, contradictory, demanding. One constant conflict I would struggle with was between going out for fun with family or staying home, neither solution ever being satisfying because the losers always grumbled and growled and raged in my head. I could never satisfy myself, and felt like it was a darkness that I was battling with because I didn't have a light to illuminate the situation for what it was.

Overly dramatic of course, but in middle school when most of these good/evil ocs were established, well. Isn't every middle schooler at least a Little overly dramatic in everything they see? ;)

As for those ocs, I'm not sure they will remain as systems - not because I don't want to write it, but having these characters I care so much for and love... They deserve better, and while writing a positive system experience for them is one way to go about it, for me it'll always resonate too closely to those less ideal portrayals in their roots. It'll mean retelling those old stories of the trauma that defined them. I definitely intend to write positive system portrayals going forward, including these struggles, but I think I need a fresh template to start with. My old ocs have earned a rest from the trauma I put them through for so long, I want to give them a happy story from the start this time.