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maribatshipper · 3 years

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Ice Age reader insert Chapter 3

"What are you doing? Just drop it on the ledge." Manny frowns.

The baby is put on the ledge and makes a squeal of excitement.

"Should we make sure they found him?" Sid asks.

"Good idea." Manny smirks.

"No, no no! Wait wait wait! AHHH! Don't spear me!" There's a pause, then Sid frowns, "Oh, this is a problem."

Y/N jumps over the ledge and frowns, looking through everything for something useful.

"Now what?" Manny asks, looking at the camp. "Oh, that's perfect!"

Y/N picks up some rope and shoves it in her backpack. She then takes apart the tents and folds the fabric, putting it in her backpack.

"What are you doing?" Diego asks, appearing behind her.

Y/N answers while putting another rope in her backpack, "Simple. I have few provisions to keep myself warm, and seeing as the previous humans aren't here, and they haven't been for a few hours, meaning they won't be back, I'm taking their stuff so it doesn't go to waste."

She looks over to Manny to see him looking at a baby hugging a chair. Diego walks up to him as the baby falls in a basket.

"I told you they were gone." Diego frowns.

Manny scoffs, "Well, look who it is. Don't you have some poor defenseless animal to disembowel?"

E/N chuckles, "Damn, I forgot how savage Manny can be."

Sid interrupts Y/N's train of thought, trying to figure out where the humans went. Y/N picks up some ashes out of the fire and rubs them between her fingers, feeling how hot it is.

"You don't know much about tracking, do you?" Diego asks Sid.

Sid answers, "Hey, I'm a sloth. I see a tree, I eat a leaf, that's my tracking."

Y/N frowns, "We didn't miss them by much. The fire pit's warm enough to touch. My estimation is the fire was put out about two hours ago, and by the way the camps in shambles, I'd say they were attacked by something and had to run."

She sees Diego stiffen slightly as he agrees, pulling out some straw from the chair, "It's still green. They headed North two hours ago."

Sid mocks the human and tiger, causing Y/N to snarl at him. The baby falls on a stick over the fire, causing a fish to be flung onto Manny. Y/N takes the fish and cuts it up, starting to eat it, causing everyone to stare at her.

"What? I haven't eaten for a while. I'm hungry. Fish is a good part of any human's diet. And it's only a few hours old." Y/N shrugs as she eats.

Diego frowns, "You don't need this aggravation. Give me the baby. I can track down humans a lot faster than you can."

Manny retorts, "And you're just a good citizen helping out, right?"

Suddenly, the two seem to be in the middle of a tug of war with the baby, causing Y/N to watch and eat the fish like Popcorn.

"I just know where the humans are going." Diego explains.

"Glacier Pass. Everybody knows they have a settlement on the other side." Manny replies, picking up the baby.

"Well unless you know how to track, your never gonna reach them before the pass closes up with snow. Which should be like... tomorrow. So, you can give that baby to me, or go get lost in a blizzard. It's your choice." Diego smirks, thinking he's got the plan.

Y/N gobbles down the last of the fish, quite satisfied, and throws the bones over the edge of the cliff as Manny picks up the baby and hands it to Sid.

"There's your little bundle of joy. We're returning it to the humans." Manny frowns.

Y/N shrugs, "Let's get moving, mammals."

Sid teases, "Oh, the big bad, tigey-wigey's being left behind. Oh poor tigey wigey-"

Y/N smirks, "Sid. Tigey-wigey's leading us to the humans."

Manny nods, "She's right."

Sid pales, "Uh, Manny, N/N... Can I talk to you for a second?"

Manny and Y/N chorus, "No."

Manny frowns, "The sooner we find the humans, the sooner I get rid of Mr Stinky-drool face. And the baby too."

E/N cackles, "I'm loving this guy! Are we sure he's not even a little evil?"

Diego frowns towards Sid, "You won't always have Jumbo around to protect you. And when that day comes, I suggest you watch your back. Cause I'll be chewing on it."

Manny calls Diego, "Hey, uber tracker! Up front, where I can see you!"

Y/N walks to the front with Diego and smirks, "Nice silver tongue, Tiger. But you better watch your back. If you sell us out to any Saber-tooth pals you have, you won't live to see the morning after the betrayal. Capiche?"

Diego asks "What makes you think I know other Sabers?"

"You're a pack animal. It all comes with the territory. I'll be watching you." Y/N smirks as she falls back to Manny.

***

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After a few hours walking, the baby starts crying. Y/N pulls the headphones out of her bag and places them on her head, muffling the noise. But it doesn't get muffled enough, so she connects it to her phone and turns up the volume, playing F/S that's been downloaded. Eventually, Manny cracks.

"Oh you gotta make it stop! I can't take it any more!" Manny exclaims.

Y/N stops the music and turns of the headphones, hanging them around her neck.

"I've eaten things that didn't complain this much!" Diego yells.

E/N smirks, "Of course they didn't complain. They were dead when he ate them. How long until they realise he's hungry?"

Y/N mentally answers, "Let's give them five minutes."

Sid says, "It won't stop squirming!" holding the baby upside down.

Diego yells. "You're holding it wrong!"

"Watch it's head!" Manny exclaims.

Y/N groans and snatches the baby off Sid and puts it on a rock and shushes it, making it quiet for a moment.

"How'd you do that?" Diego asks.

Y/N answers, "It's only temporary. Now I can think. Figure out a way to keep it happy while I can think again."

The baby starts crying again while the boys input ideas.

"Hey, it's nose is dry." Diego notices.

Sid frowns, "That means something's wrong with it."

"Someone should lick it, just in case." Diego inputs.

Y/N calls out, "Wrong! Human noses are naturally dry!"

Manny inputs, "Hey, he's wearing one of those baby thingy's!"

Sid asks, "So?"

"So if he poops, where does it go?" Manny replies.

E/N frowns, "That's the only smart guess they've had. Too bad it's not it."

Sid frowns, "Humans are disgusting."

Y/N nods, "Tell me about it."

Manny points at Sid, "Okay you. Check for poop."

"Wait, why am I the poop checker?" Sid asks.

Manny lists, "Because returning the runt was your idea. Because your small and insignificant. Because I'll pummel you if you don't."

Sid asks, "Uh, why else?"

"NOW, SID!" Manny orders, it echoing slightly.

Y/N watches the idiots check the diaper, only to find out it's clean, when Manny hits Sid in the head, causing the baby to laugh. The baby starts crying again.

"Hey do that again. He likes it!" Diego smiles.

Manny hits Sid again, causing the baby to giggle again.

"It's making me feel better too." Manny smiles.

Sid goes over to Diego and frowns, "Here, you hold him."

Diego hits Sid, causing the baby to laugh. The baby tries slapping Sid now. Sid grabs the baby's hand and puts him back on the rock. Diego's turn now. He does the "Where's the baby" trick, but it scares the baby.

"You guys know the baby's hungry, right?" Y/N frowns.

The boys turn to Y/N in shock, and two of the faces are angry.

"How long have you known this?" Diego growls.

Y/N shrugs, "I figured after the second hour of screaming, but there was no food around, so I just droned him out until you guys cracked. Then I wanted to see how long until you guys figured it out."

She then walks over to a bush where a watermelon pops out. She quickly picks it up, only for a dodo bird to snatch it off her.

"Oi! Give that back to me, you prehistoric buttsnack!" Y/N chases after the bird.

***

The group follows Y/N to a dodo bird nest-like place, where dodo's are acting like soldiers and conspiracy theorists.

"Prepare for the ice age!" A dodo yells.

Sid asks, "Ice age?"

Diego frowns, "I've heard of these crackpots."

Y/N scoffs, "I'm sure humans have their own version of these weirdos."

The dodo that stole the melon from the group sees them then yells out, "Intruders!"

After running like a maniac, he falls into a tar pit where he dies.

Manny asks, "Hey, can we have our melon back? Jr's hungry, and-"

A dodo interrupts, "No way! This is our private stockpile for the ice age! Subarctic temperatures will force us underground for over a billion billion years!"

Y/N frowns, "You only have three melons. You should've started stockpiling at least three years ago with food that won't rot so quickly and with a few seeds to grow your food, buttsnacks."

The birds look towards the melons, then back towards the mammals.

"If you weren't smart enough to plan ahead then doom on you!" The dodo scowls.

The other dodos chant, "Doom on you!" as they walk closer to the mammals.

Manny frowns, "Get away from me!"

Y/N slaps a dodo that gets too close when a melon rolls towards the mammals.

"Mine now! Thank you! Tata!" Y/N smirks as she runs away with the Melon.

"Retrieve the melon! Tai-kwon-dodos! Attack!"

Y/N pales as she remembers this part. A dodo kicks another dodo, and a dodo manages to kick the melon out of her hands.

"Oh come on!" Y/N frowns.

She then watches as the melon is thrown over a cliff.

"That's one." Y/N frowns as a few dodos fall off the cliff trying to get the melon back.

She sits down next to the baby and watches the show, quite entertained.

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*Skip to the last melon*

She watches as the dodos attack Sid and winces. The melon bounces towards Manny, who catches it and keeps it out of the dodos reach. A dodo decides to bite his tail, causing him to throw it.

"And this is how football/soccer was invented. With a watermelon." E/N smirks.

Sid catches it, and finds himself cornered. Y/N nods at him, telling him to run. He puts his hand out and closes his eyes, somehow getting to the end of the line without much of a struggle, somehow causing some dodos to stack on top of one another. The dodos surround him again and he jumps, causing them all to run into each other. He lands on the ground, away from the dodos, causing everyone to cheer. He then throws the melon onto the ground, cracking it open.

"Oh, Sid! Now we gotta find more food!" Diego frowns.

Y/N smirks, "Actually, he just made it easier to get to the good stuff. Look."

The mammals look to see the baby eating it.

"I'm getting sick of calling it “the baby”. Can we please call it Junior?" E/N asks.

Y/N silently agrees as Junior continues eating.

"Hey, Junior? Can I have some please?" Y/N asks.

Junior passes some to her and she eats it.

"Thanks buddy."

The dodos stacked up try to tell the guy on the bottom where to go as they pass the mammals.

"Hey look at that. Dinner and a show." Manny jokes.

Y/N yells at the dodos, "May your ears turn into buttholes then crap on your shoulders!"

Everyone stares at Y/N in shock as the dodos fall of a cliff.

#Ice Age reader insert #Ice age #Manny #Sid #Diego

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