#second most pretiest girl I have seen | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tremblinglionheart · 3 years

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Why all girls are shallow. Not.

Ok, stay with me for a minute.

Today I had a discussion with someone who claimed that most girls where shallow and they cared a lot more for personality than for looks but that was so hard to find and I just... we discussed all the reasons why that’s bullshit.

But I actually don’t want to talk about all the reasons right now. I’m assuming you all know why it’s bullshit (if you don’t know I’m more than happy to elaborate, just let me know)

What I want to talk about is six girls I met. All six of them were girls that could easily be classified as shallow (to be honest, I classified two of them as shallow myself before I got to know them). All of them cared a lot about their looks, wore the newest clothes, spent a lot of time on their looks and with one exception all of them were incredibly pretty.

And I want to share their stories with you because honestly, since the discussion I can’t stop thinking about them and they so nicely show why calling someone shallow is stupid (especially if you don’t know them really well).

1. I met her in middle school. She had the terrible habit of putting other people down, making fun of their looks. You get the drift. She picked the “ugliest” person in the class and made their life hell. I found our years later that she used to get bullied all through out kindergarden and primary school because “she was so ugly”. When she got to middle school she made a vow to not suffer like that again and the only way she knew how to prevent it was to become like all the people that had bullied her. Being shallow was her way of protecting herself (not saying what she did was good but I’m not blaming a desperate bullied child).

2. Also met her in middle school. She was what some people would call the queen bee. Always pretty. Everyones best friend. The gossip center. Her family was incredibly poor, her father was god knows where and her mother never was home. She spent most of her time looking after her little sister. She wasn’t very smart. In her opinion her only redeeming quality, the only thing that could get her somewhere better in life, were her looks. Being pretty was her best hope of making a better life for herself.

3. We went to the same highschool. She was one of the pretiest girls in class. I was the awkward misfit wearing all black and band shirts and oversized jumpers. During a free period she sat with me to talk. She asked me why I always wore the things I wore because she was sure I knew people judged me for it. I told her I didn’t care what people thought about me. She said she envied me for that. That she would love to be that confident because she really liked comfortable clothes but she was terrified of other peoples opinions. She wasn’t shallow, she was just so scared and lacking self esteem.

4. I met her in therapy. She was probably the prettiest girls I have ever seen outside of a TV. And her lifestory was one of the saddest I’ve ever heard. I’m not going into detail but basicly she has spent her whole life being blamed, bullied and guilt triped for her mothers death (her mother died to give birth to her). And she tried to burry all that guilt under make up because she was convinced they were right and she had to accept her own awfullness. And she didn’t want anyone else to see what an awfull person she was. For her being pretty was a shot at being a normal person and having at least one aspect in her life that wasn’t completely broken.

5. I met her through a friend. She was small even for a girl and really cute. She spent hours painting her nails so they fit her outfit for the day perfectly. She had always been the smallest. The easiest target. The easiest to push around. She decided to be cute, clueless and shallow so people would not bother with her and leave her alone because “She wasn’t worth their time”. Because people looking down on her was easier than being pushed around and beaten up.

6. I met her at university. Probably the second most beautiful girl/woman I have ever seen outside of TV. She spent years living in an abusive relationship. Noone believed her. Noone helped her. When she dressed up pretty for her boyfriend he was less prone to hurt her because he didn’t want to physically damage his “beautiful property” after she put such an effort in to please him. People called her shallow. Being pretty was the only defense she had to keep herself from being beaten bloddy. (To anyone concerned, she was able to get away from him and got a really nice therapist that helped her work through her trauma. She moved out of the country a few years back, unwilling to stay in the place where her ex lived and all the family and friends that hadn’t believed her. She has a happy relationship and a happy life now.)

All six of them were called shallow because they looked pretty. Often by people who had hardly spoken with them because if those people had they would have learned that all of them were unique personalities, with their own quirks, own good and bad traits and most of them were incredibly empathetic and not shallow at all.

Don’t judge a book by it’s cover. That goes both ways. Don’t judge someone because they don’t fit in. But don’t judge someone because they fit in either. You never know what you will find once you actually get to know them.

And in my experience there is noone who doesn’t have a package to carry. There’s noone who doesn’t have a sad story to tell if you’re just willing to listen.

And isn’t it funny, someone being shallow means that person judges others by their looks, without knowing them. But somehow it’s nearly always directed at pretty and often popular people.

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