#second annual summer blockbuster review
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Folks, we’d like to show you clips of one of the crappier big movies of the summer, but we’d get sued. Yes, we’d get sued for showing you clips of [redacted].
#mst3k#mystery science theater 3000#crow t robot#godzilla 1998#godzilla 98#second annual summer blockbuster review
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Three Summer Taquilla Behemoths in Cinemas!
WOKE! Film Reviews...Halfway Through Summer
by Lucas A Cavazos
It goes without saying that Disney is undoubtedly the strongest hand in all of cinema. They have proved that beyond any shadow of a doubt over many decades but definitely most recently, what with the takeover of Pixar and LucasFilms and Marvel Studios and and and… As I hinted at last time, growing up, whether in Texas or Brooklyn, my dorky bum always had that weekly subscription of Entertainment Weekly waiting for me come week’s end. And that meant I had all the box office data, top album sales, Nielsen TV ratings, book sales and such all there to satiate my stats-obsessed appetite. Now, I bring to you a summer run-down of what fare has been most successful throughout this first half of the summer. Believe it or not, we are only halfway through the summer cinema season and these last six or seven weeks mark the last summer fare that either got delayed from the early summer due to concern of being pulverised by these upcoming blockbusters, or they are merely getting rid of fodder too long on the shelf or in need of distribution.
I’d dare say in fact that it was a rather smart move on behalf of Guy Ritchie and the entire marketing team behind the live-action remake of Aladdin, to release it just before the summer season truly hit. It is now fast closing in on 25€M in Spain alone, and has surpassed 1.1€B globally…quite an accomplished feat and second in box office stealth only behind Endgame for 2019 so far.
But let’s please talk newer reviews first as Disney’s The Lion King ###-1/2 burst into Spanish cinemas with a loud roar two weeks ago, and the same can be said of its success worldwide. Now soon to pass 19€M in Spain in a matter of mere days and more than 1.0€B globally, we at Bitter Life are pleased to say that the film, much like the formerly mentioned live-action remake, is a thing of wonder. What director Jon Favreau, who so lovingly concocted the impeccable remake of The Jungle Book a few years ago, does so well is adapt a timeless, and much beloved, cartoon classic into a breathtaking adventure story of the animal kingdom. One thing is for certain, if you are a true lover of the cartoon, this film will merely be palatable. For those few of us who were none too keen on the cartoon and its cheese-tactic musical numbers nor its cornball last-attempts at Top 40 numbers by Elton John, this film is quite the spectacle to behold. Telling the story of a proud lineage of lions who preside over what could best be described more as a savannah than a jungle, this rendering gives us a lifelike portrayal of fathers and sons, duty and honour, and is easily a testament to whatever family means to any individual. Apart from the brilliant, yet almost frightening, way in which the creators have anthropomorphised the creatures into almost too-real perfection, there isn’t too much to tell that the viewer is not going to know already, and thereby lies a part of the challenge that I find intriguing. While Disney continues to take risks in revamping their classics into live-action newer ones, do they then run the risk of petering out of new ideas? I mean, now that they have Pixar and so many more studios to pick up the slack, will we slowly see the demise of the annual big, Disney cartoon classic? We already have Frozen 2 appearing soon enough in cinemas, but even that is not building anything new and original into the cartoon oeuvre…it’s a damn sequel. I say it’s fair enough that most all investments in Disney live-action prequels are bound to be successful in terms of box office. Still, few of them will boast the talent power of Beyonce and Donald Glover, along with original Mufasa James Earl Jones, plus John Oliver, Seth Rogen, Keegan-Michael Key, Alfre Woodard. Amy Sedaris and so many more. These artists breathe life into a fun, if tired, film that we’ve all seen before, just never in this way. Here’s to hoping the tots of today don’t scare too much from the frolicking if fierce, fun found in this film.
The next big movie that has blown up the taquillas here in Spain is also the best one of the lot…Toy Story 4 ####. If we have to wait nearly a decade between film sequels to have this type of wonderment thrown lovingly at our eyes, I’ll gladly take it and wait. So far, the film has taken in a nearly whopping 19€M in Spain alone, and it is also nearing 950€M worldwide, so far be it from me to deny that absolute scores of millions agree that this film marks itself in our hearts yet again. It is rather surreal that over the span of well over a generation, the creators have moved through the mid-90s to damn near 2020 with the same revolving door of a family, while carefully detailing the intricacies of our own nostalgia…and playing on that also forces us to love it. Again, I dare say that they have achieved that tremendously throughout the entirety of the series’ lifespan. The premise this time revolves around Andy, now all grown up and, I’d suppose well past grad school, has donated his toys to little sister Bonnie, who has her own taste on what she prefers to play with versus her older brother, and dear ol’ cowpoke Woody, sensing certain neglect under the ownership of Bonnie, sneaks himself into her rucksack one day y voila!…the new adventure commences. The others set off to search for Woody, outdone by no one less than Buzz Lightyear, who is allowing himself to be led by his inner voice, which fits wonderfully into the guffaws of this type of silly and campy humour. What I began to notice while the screening went on is that the film continues to come up with a specific theme that ties itself into the plot, the denouement and frankly, throughout the film. Simply put, that would be the fear of rejection or not being wanted/accepted. Herein is where story developers like John Lasseter, Andrew Stanton, Rashida Jones, Stephany Folsom, amongst others, and all under the directing tutelage of Josh Cooley, spring to life and steer the film into witty and on-fleek, au courant elements that should make excellent fodder for post-parental conversations! What more can be said? Steal away and grab a 10’er and retreat to the coolness of your local cineplex!
Lastly, the other big box office behemoth so far this summer in Spain’s movie houses is Spider Man: Far From Home ###-1/2, with just under 12€M reaped into the Spanish taquilla coffers. This time around finds us back in live-action mode and with our recurring Marvel characters picking up after the what can only be described as intense ending of Avengers:Endgame. Okay then, while I was not a fan of the new Peter Parker with Homecoming from a couple of years back, I can now see how Tom Holland has taken a stab at ye olde generic if endearing dork-that-could appeal, and he feels much more fluid now a few Marvel flicks in. Director Jon Watts and go-to writers McKenna and Sommers seem to strike a chord with their flow, though we really do have to wait until the last half of the film to see the ebb actually catch up with that flow. Here’s why…our Marvel superheroes have gone bye bye, you dig? Flashbacks of the fallen Marvel superheroes actually made me a tad sad to be honest, so when the injection of the last part kicks in with all its CGI glory, what I take the director and writers to be doing, this time around, is actually showing us how Parker is growing into his own belief within himself and his powers. Zendaya as his love interest, and I’ve monitored her from afar for quite some time, is fun as hell to watch, and she should seriously star in a film version of Sade’s life story, but it really does come down to the charm and vivid need for suspension of disbelief that envelops the characters towards the end of the film. This has a lot to do with the enter-stage-right presence of Quentin Beck, a.k.a. Mysterio, played with an enigmatic if smug awareness by Jake Gyllenhaal, and frankly, all of the myriad cast of characters do their thang to breathe a sense of renewal just when you think the film is getting a tad too slow and eager. From Sam Jackson to Marisa Tomei, though perhaps not Jon Favreau as Stark caretaker Happy Hogan…he’s best suited as a director of Disney re-boots these days, me thinks (see The Lion King review above). Apart from all that, I’d say the Marvel universe has quite rightly fixed another pathway into the continuance of the Spiderverse journey.
#abitterlifethroughcinema#SummerBoxOfficeReport#thelionking2019#BEY#Disney#Pixar#ToyStory4#woodyandbuzzforever#marvelATMarvel#spiderman far from home#jake gyllenhaal#tomholland#zendaya#jon favreau#EnglishRadioBCN
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Destiel Trope Collection 2018
Day 13 | Fake Dating
Roll With It | @saltnhalo
Rating: Explicit
Word count: 72,818
Main Tags/Warnings: Boss/Employee Relationship, Secretary Dean, AU, Romantic Comedy, Editor!Castiel, Fluff and Angst, Russian!Castiel, Sharing a Bed, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Misunderstandings, Love Confessions
Summary: For two years, Dean’s been slaving away beneath his boss – many label him a secretary, but he fucking hates that and feels like it only applies to someone wearing a pencil skirt, so he insists on his title of Executive Assistant. And for what? In the vain hope that one day he’ll manage to become an editor for Sandover Publishing, and that he’ll see the manuscript that he’s slaved over since college finally realized in print.
That’s the dream, anyway.
Right now, he’s fucking late.
Dean wants to be an editor. Castiel just wants to stay in the country.
‘The Proposal’ – as you’ve never seen it before.
Let’s Pretend (We’re in Love) | @blueascend
Rating: Teen & Up Audiences
Word Count: 2,191
Main Tags/Warnings: AU
Summary: Sam rubbed the back of his neck. “You were gonna come and visit me in Lawrence this summer anyway, right? So when you think about it, this really doesn’t change anything.”
“Except your family will think that we are romantically involved.”
“Right.” Sam laughed nervously. “Except for that. Obviously.”
The Exception to Every Rule | @mittensmorgul
Rating: Mature
Word Count: 58,784
Main Tags/Warnings: Modern Setting, Actor!Dean, Bodyguard!Castiel, Stalking, Hollywood, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers, Sharing a Bed
Summary: When Sam was accepted to Stanford, he finally convinced Dean to move to Los Angeles to pursue his acting dreams after sacrificing for four years to support Sam throughout high school. Dean never imagined landing the starring role in a Hollywood blockbuster film franchise, but in just two years he’d gone from obscurity on the Lawrence Community Theater stage to become one of the fastest rising stars in the country. He’s adapting pretty well to this new life in the spotlight– until one unhealthily obsessed fan prompts Dean’s agent to hire a specialist from Seraphim Security to watch over him.
Enter Castiel, one of Seraphim’s newest “Angels,” and the only one available to take on Dean’s case a week before Christmas. With Dean’s life on the line, Castiel does his best to maintain a professional distance, but with every passing day they’re both finding themselves making more and more exceptions to their rules.
Smoke and Mirrors | donovanspen
Rating: Mature
Word Count: 19,998
Main Tags/Warnings: Human!Castiel, Case Fic, Protective!Dean, Dubious Consent
Summary: Sam and Dean head to the Poconos to investigate strange occurrences at an inn that specializes in romantic getaways. However, nobody’s talking and the only way to get access to the inn is as a guest. Unaware that Dean and Cas have been deliberately avoiding each other, Sam asks Cas for help.
A Study in Fake | @sternchencas
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 4,933
Main Tags/Warnings: mutual pining, bed sharing, fluff
Summary: Although Dean has a job, he’s always looking for some extra money, so he’s bummed out when he can’t take part in a lucrative couples study at the local college. At least until Castiel Novak steps into his life out of nowhere and a throwaway joke turns into a serious relationship. Well, a fake one, but nobody needs to know that, right?
a dangerous thing | @reallyelegantsharkfish
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 46,489
Main Tags/Warnings: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Sex Worker!Dean, Camboy!Dean, Alpha!Castiel, Omega!Dean
Summary: Dean spends all his time being desired by others – makes his living that way – but being lusted after isn’t the same thing as being wanted, and he’s never felt wanted. Which is why he ends up answering an email that starts with “Dear sir, I hope this letter doesn’t offend you…” and ends with “You will be compensated generously for your time. Sincerely, Castiel Novak.”
The email says Castiel is looking for “the boyfriend experience,” as they call it in Dean’s profession. He wants a live-in, someone to hold him at night, someone to make him dinner and greet him after a long day of work with a smile, someone to play pretend with.
like an april flood | @alexdamnvers
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 4,540
Main Tags/Warnings: Sam Ships It, First Kiss, High School AU, Friends to Lovers
Summary: Dean’s date quits on him days before the annual family Christmas party, and he asks his friend Cas to fake-date him. Thing is, the feelings between them are anything but fake.
Peak Homosexual | @thebloggerbloggerfun
Rating: General Audiences
Word Count: 3,791
Main Tags/Warnings: Roommates, Homophobia, Homophobic language
Summary: You know that thing that happens where you hear something really homophobic in public so you gay it up as much as you can? This is that story.
Do It For Science | @robotsnchicks
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 4,941
Main Tags/Warnings: College AU, Roommates, Humor and Smut
Summary: When Dean finds an ad offering to pay $500 to committed couples willing to test and review condoms, it seems almost too good to be true. The only catch is that Dean’s been without a partner for a while now. When he convinces his roommate Cas to pretend to be his boyfriend it seems like a perfect solution, but he soon realizes that he may be in over his head.
Everything Comes Back to You | @scones-and-texting-and-murder
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 32,970
Main Tags/Warnings: fake/pretend relationship, couple for the case, bed sharing, trapped/isolated, hurt/comfort
Summary: Dean knew better. Of course he did. But Cas seemed so charmed by the antique-filled bed and breakfast that Dean went along with it when the proprietor mistook them for a couple. Telling himself it gave them a strategic advantage to be so close to the crime scene, he agreed to the weekend special she offered them. When the case ended up being a bust, they stuck around anyhow because hey, the second night was free…
After All These Years | @all-i-need-is-destiel
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 83,056 (WIP)
Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe, Fluff, Reunions, Single Parent Dean, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn
Summary: In which Dean finds himself at a wedding as Jo’s fake boyfriend against his will, groaning and complaining the whole time, but still trying to appear all handsome and perfect and utterly in love since he’s an awesome friend like that (and since Jo would make his life a living hell otherwise). And just when he begins to think that it won’t be so bad to eat tons of free food and let his daughter Emma enjoy the festivity, his gaze suddenly meets the two bluest eyes in existence and the world stops to move for a moment.
Because of course the groom’s brother turns out to be his old high school crush Castiel – the only person Dean was never able to forget – and things start to become really freaking complicated all of a sudden.
What’s Another Word For “You”? | @ltleflrt
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 3,839
Main Tags/Warnings: Writer!Dean, Editor!Castiel, Fluff, Pining, Friends to Lovers
Summary: When Castiel offers to protect Dean from his adoring fans by going with him to a convention, he intended to act as an unofficial bodyguard. But Dean misinterprets his offer in the best kind of way.
#destiel trope collection#destielfanficnet#profoundnet#Destiel#Supernatural#Fanfic#Masterlist#Trope List#fake dating#2018
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WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND 8/10/18 – The Meg, Slender Man, BlacKkKlansman, Dog Days
If you didn’t read last week’s column about August at the box office, then go ahead and do so now, but this week, we have a similar slate of potential hits and bombs that will mainly rely on whether people want to go to movie theaters to get away from the oppressive heat wave, or instead, go to the beach. Of course, if it rains this weekend, it will definitely help the movies.
THE MEG (Warner Bros.)
First up, is the first shark movie we’ve had in theaters in quite some time, and a PG-13 one to boot. The Meg, based on Steve Alten’s book Meg: A Novel of Deep Terror about a prehistoric shark that rears its ugly head in the Pacific Ocean. Unfortunately for this shark, it’s going to have to go up against Jason Statham in his first prominent role since appearing in last year’sFate of the Furious, and before he and Dwayne Johnson get their own Hobbs & Shaw spin-off next year.
The Meg is directed by Jon Turtletaub, best known for the National Treasuremovies, but he went on to direct The Sorcerer’s Apprentice for Disney (which didn’t do nearly as well) and directed CBS Films’ Last Vegas, which was a decent breakout comedy among older audiences. Maybe Turtletaub wouldn’t seem like the most likely suspect to direct a giant shark movie, but hey, more power to him.
The movie also stars Rainn Wilson (who I didn’t even recognize in the trailer), New Zealand’s Cliff Curtis (from Fear the Walking Dead) and Chinese superstar Bingbing Li, and by superstar, I mean that she seems to be put into every movie from Transformers: Age of Extinction to Resident Evil: Retribution in order to get Chinese audiences to see her movies. She’s not to be confused with Tian Jing who Legendary who puts in all of THEIR movies (three, so far) in order to help get Chinese audiences. I shouldn’t be cynical (especially with Crazy Rich Asians coming out next week), but at least it also stars Winston Chao, who starred in Ang Lee’s The Wedding Banquet, as well as starring the ever-present Orange is the New Black star Ruby Rose, who has appeared in four sequels in the last two years and has just been cast as Batwoman in a new CW television series.
I’m not sure if the actors on this matter much outside Statham, because shark enthusiasts even rushed out to see a Mandy Moore movie when 47 Meters Down opened last summer to $11.2 million in just 2,207 theaters, even though that wasn’t really a shark movie. When you talk about shark movies, you have to go back to the grand-daddy of them all, Steven Spielberg’s Jaws, which was the talk of the summer of 1975, becoming one of the first bonafide summer blockbuster, grossing $260 million, which is a LOT by ‘70s standards. Warner’s last attempt at a shark movie was 1999’s Deep Blue Sea, directed by Renny Harlin and starring Samuel L. Jackson and L.L. Cool J. That shark movie opened with $19.1 million and grossed $73.6 million but became a cult classic in the bargain. Surely, the interest in sharks and shark movies has only been exacerbated by Animal Planet’s annual Shark Week, which is mentioned in one of the trailer’s jokes, not to mention the super-bad Sharknado movies.
As the studio’s second to last movie of the summer, Warner Bros. has been giving this movie a huge marketing push, both on television and in theaters, where it was almost impossible to miss the trailer in front of other summer blockbusters, and the studio is putting it into close to 4,000 theaters (including IMAX), a number usually reserved for higher-profile blockbusters.
Reviews will probably be rather mixed, because The Meg is the type of summer popcorn movie that rarely is admired by the snobbier film critics, but it also seems fairly review-proof, because it seems like one of those fun popcorn movies we expect in the summer, which should allow it to do decently opening weekend, in the $20 to 25 million range opening weekend and maybe $65 million or slightly more with the summer winding down. Maybe it won’t be seen as big a bomb as Statham’s FF co-star Dwayne Johnson’s Skyscraper earlier this summer, but with a budget over $150 million, this one better hope that Chinese audiences like shark movies as much as Americans, because it’s not making that back domestically.
Mini-Review: What can be said about this giant, prehistoric shark movie other than if you’ve already watched the trailer a bunch of times, you’ll already know whether you’re in or out? After watching Jason Statham’s Jonas Taylor losing a couple of his friends in a submarine rescue mission gone pear-shaped, we cut forward five years to China where… wait, isn’t this the beginning of Skyscraper? It won’t take long to realize that The Meg is cut from the same cloth as the recent popcorn movie starring Statham’s Fast and Furious buddy, although in this case, Statham is constantly being overshadowed (quite literally) by the giant CG shark of the title.
It takes a little time to get there as we first have to visit the high-tech deepsea exploratory vessel in the Pacific Ocean, and we meet the team, as they’re about to make a dive into an area below the icy bottom of the Marianas Trench. The mission is going as planned until a large creature hits the deep-sea vessel leaving three members of the team trapped at the bottom of the ocean. Sure enough, they have to call upon Jonas Taylor, who happens to be the ex-husband of the lead scientist, sowe spend another 45 minutes on this rescue mission before we discover (big surprise) that the Megalodon they discovered has gotten out from under the icy depths where it was trapped. From there, we follow the course of events as the team try to put a stop to the Megalodon, and that’s all you really need to know.
The problem is that there are so many characters in the movie, each fighting for their little bit of screen-time against Statham. The writing is so driven by corny and obvious clichés, it’s almost painfully obvious the role each of these characters will play, including Page Kennedy’s funny black guy but especially Rainn Wilson’s corrupt billionaire who is going to make all the wrong calls for the sake of making money. Ruby Rose’s character gets very little to do as so much focus is put on Bingbing Lee’s character and her family. The thing is that you never feel much for either the characters that live or the ones that die, and an 8-year-old girl steals many scenes from the rest of the cast, including Statham.
By the time we get to the Megalodon arriving in the crowded Chinese bay – a scene right out of the original Jaws– we’ve pretty much given up on trying to take any of it seriously, even if most of the cast continues to utter every line in utter po-faced earnest. Otherwise, the movie tries way too hard to throw in funny moments, but rarely really delivers much in that sense, so you watch things unfold as might be expected.
In other words, The Meg is the corniest of popcorn movies that’s mostly ridiculous and predicable. Just don’t go in expecting Jaws, but maybe something closer to Jaws 2.
Rating: 6.5/10
SLENDER MAN (Screen Gems)
The movie offering the most direct competition for The Meg is this horror film that’s been moved around the schedule so much one wonders if this could possibly have the same quality as some of Screen Gems’ previous releases like 2016’s Don’t Breathe from Fede Alvarez. That one opened even later in August 2016 with an impressive $26.4 million opening on its way to $89.2 million (based on a $10 million budget), helping to solidify Alvarez as a master of horror after his Evil Dead remake a few years earlier.
Directed by Sylvain White (The Losers, Stomp the Yard), you may know Slender Man as the viral internet sensation and urban myth that ended up with one girl almost being murdered by a couple of her classmates “because Slender Man told them to do it.” There’s a lot more to this meme, which is mostly known by younger people who use the internet, but this is a fairly typical movie about teens being haunted by something menacing. (If you want to learn know more about the near-murder, check out the HBO doc Beware the Slenderman.)s
Screen Gems was originally going to release this later in August, but they took a big chance by switching it with the Sundance sensation Searching (one of my faves from the festival) to give this a bigger push earlier in the month. Unfortunately, it’s also going up against a much stronger (or equally strong) draw for young people in The Meg, so genre fans will certainly be torn with this one drawing the teen girls and that one getting older males.
This stars Joey King, who also appeared in last year’s high concept horror flick Wish Upon, which opened with just $5.5 million and grossed $14.3 million, one of the last ditch efforts by Broad Green to have a hit.
In any other weekend, this would probably be good for a $20 million opening, but opening in just 2,000 theaters with less of a push and no big name stars to sell it (sorry, Joey!), this one will be lucky to make $15 million this weekend and might end up somewhere below that. This will definitely be more of a one-weekend wonder than some of the summer’s other films so expect large drops in the coming weeks.
Mini-Review: If ever there was a movie that would make you miss Wes Craven, this attempt at furthering an urban legend might be it, as you wonder what he might have done with the premise of a boogeyman that has kids performing rituals to find out if he’s real or not.
In this case, it’s four high school friends who hear of boys trying to call forth the Slender Man, so they follow suit, knowing of his infamy for kidnapping kids and/or killing them and/or driving them crazy. Sure enough, the next day, one of them disappears, so they have to figure out a way to get her back.
Obviously, Slender Man uses a similar model as Ouija or the awful Truth or Dare from earlier in the year where a bunch of dumb teenagers decide to do the one thing they’re not supposed to do, killing them off one by one. The only thing that makes Slender Man even slightly novel is that the character has already become a viral meme on the internet from teens who have created artwork and fake videos of the character (many of which are used for the movie).
The movie is almost as predictable as The Meg in that it’s fairly obvious where things are going at least until the end, and at least none of the young female actors get annoying, as often can be the case. There are also not many grown-up actors to muck up the story that’s clearly geared towards teen girls, but the lack of real tension or scares does hurt the movie overall.
To Sylvain White’s credit, this isn’t a horrible movie, a lot of that to do with the film’s strong genre visuals and an ambient score that keeps one on edge, and the actual Slender Man, while not particularly scary, also isn’t as bad as some of the twisted CG creatures from other horror films.
I guess the best that can be said about Slender Man is that it could have been a lot, lot worse.
Rating: 6/10
BLACKKKLANSMAN (Focus Features)
Spike Lee is back with another racially-charged and potentially controversial political film, but also his first real-life story in ten years since Miracle at St. Anna but also his best reviewed theatrically-released narrative film in 20 years. (How’s THAT for a variance factor?) Based on the true story of Ron Stallworth, a black Colorado Springs policeman who managed to infiltrated the KKK in order to stop their radical plans.
BlacKkKlansman premiered at the Cannes Film Festival in May to rave reviews (and a prestigious award being mentioned in the ads) and the raves have continued with more recent reviews that are still at 97% on Rotten Tomatoes, and this is a rare case where reviews will matter and make a difference at getting people into theaters.
This is the highest profile role for Denzel Washington’s son John David Washington, who also appeared in the Sundance film Monsters and Men and in RZA’s Love Beats Rhymes last year, but the biggest name is likely to be Adam Driver, best known as Kylo Ren from the recent Star Wars movies. It also stars Laura Harrier from last year’s Spider-Man: Homecoming and Topher Grace in the unenviable role of KKK grandmaster David Duke.
Lee’s last few movies haven’t done great with his controversial Old Boy remake starring Samuel L. Jackson making even less than his independently-produced musical Chi-Raq, both making less than $3 million domestically. What makes this somewhat different is that white critics are getting behind it as much as black critics, which should bring in a nice mix of the arthouse crowd and the African Americans who have been waiting for Spike Lee to return to the greatness of earlier films Do the Right Thing and Jungle Fever.
BlacKkKlansman seems likely to be the breakout movie of the weekend, although opening in just 1,630 theaters might limit its potential opening to closer to $7 or 8 million rather than giving the two movies above a run for the Top 3. Even so, expect word-of-mouth to continue to drive this to a domestic gross of somewhere in the high-$20 mil, low-$30 mil range, which would make it Spike Lee’s biggest hit since Inside Manwith Denzel Washington.
Mini-Review: Spike Lee has finally found a vehicle that plays up to his strengths, while also returning him to the realm of both Malcolm X and earlier films like Do the Right Thing. It’s a film that allows him to explore race relations in this country through the eyes of the real-life Ron Stallworth, the first black cop in the suburban Colorado Springs who decides to go undercover infiltrating the local KKK branch in the early ‘70s.
Ron Stallworth’s story is a solid one, and it’s told in a way that for the most part is lighter than one might expect, because it is hard to believe what Stall worth gets away with. More than anything, BlacKkKlansman is just a great vehicle for the younger John David Washington, who delivers a similarly-rounded performance as Lakeith Stanfield does in the recent Sorry to Bother You, and Adam Driver is great as always as his white partner who does the dirty work
One of the nicer surprises is Laura Spurrier as a local college activist who Ron befriends but has to keep out of the loop about him being an undercover cop. (Cops are very much the enemy to her and her African-American college friends.)
The KKK members are deliberately played so over-the-top as the villains of the piece to make sure there’s no grey area about that matter, but Topher Grace does a decent job playing the unenviable role of David Duke.
By the last act, the movie starts feeling like it’s going on for too long with the last act dragged out by cutting between the KKK watching Birth of a Nationand the great Harry Belafonte giving an impassioned speech about the treatment of blacks in the past. It’s a really shocking and effective juxtaposition that works but also takes away from the movie’s previous tone up until that point.
As effective as this scene might be, it’s also unnecessary as we already understand the seriousness of what Stallworth has achieved, and the extended epilogue showing footage from the Charlottesville protest last year hammers things home in a way that just seems like Spike Lee being Spike Lee. We get it, Spike. There are still race problems in this country. That said, BlacKkKlansman is Spike Lee’s best film in a very long time, one that should continue the narrative that began with producer Jordan Peele’s film Get Out last year, even if it does so in not nearly as clever a way.
Rating: 7.5/10
DOG DAYS (LD Entertainment)
The odd dog out this weekend is this independent family film being distributed by LD Entertainment, Mickey Liddell’s production company that has turned into a full-blown film studio and distributor in recent years, though it hasn’t exactly made many waves in that realm. Its last theatrical release was April’s The Miracle Season with Helen Hunt, which only grossed $10.2 million domestic after an opening below $4 million, but maybe that’s good for a low-budget inspirational sports drama. LD has produced other movies that have fared better when released by other studios like Bleecker Street (Megan Leavey), Roadside Attractions (Forever My Girl) and others.
This anthology film about people’s relationship with their dogs is hoping to bring in families with younger kids that like dogs but also women, and a definite plus is that it’s directed by Ken Marino, former member of The State and David Wain collaborator whose last movie How to be a Latin Lover, a Pantelion release starring Eugenio Derbez, grossed $32.7 million last year. The ensemble cast includes Nina Dobrev and Vanessa Hudgens, who have built a fanbase from their television roles on The Vampire Diaries and High School Musical respectively, as well as Finn Wolfhard from Stranger Things. They’re joined by Eva Longoria, Rob Corddry and Thomas Lennon, which is a decent cast but not one that offers much of a draw over the cute dogs.
Last year’s Megan Leavey might be the best comparison for Dog Days, as that also involved a dog (and no, I’m not talking about Kate Mara…rimshot) and that opened with around $3.8 million in just under 2000 theaters.
I wasn’t invited to see an advanced screening of this before writing this column, so I’ll just have to assume that reviews will be pretty good – NOPE!-- though it’s hard to think there’s much awareness for this movie. (In fact, I didn’t even realize the movie opened on Wednesday since that seemed like a last-minute decision. Expect an opening in the $4 to 5 million range at best, which should be enough to break into the bottom of the top 10, but it could end up being shut out and forgotten with stronger family releases already in theaters including last week’s Christopher Robin.
This week’s top 10 should look something like this…
1. The Meg (Warner Bros.) - $22.5 million N/A
2. Mission: Impossible – Fallout (Paramount) - $20 million -43%
3. Christopher Robin (Disney) - $15.5 million -38%
4. Slender Man (Screen Gems) - $13.5 million N/A
5. BlacKkKlansman (Focus Features) - $10 million N/A
6. The Spy Who Dumped Me (Lionsgate) - $6.3 million -48%
7. Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation (Sony Pictures Animation) - $5.6 million -30%
8. Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again (Universal) - $5 million -45%
9. Dog Days (LD Entertainment) - $4.8 million N/A
10. The Equalizer 2 (Sony) - $4.5 million -48%
LIMITED RELEASES
This weekend has a ridiculous amount of specialty releases, but the summer of high-profile Sundance premieres continues with the New York release of Josephine Decker’s amazing indie film Madeline’s Madeline (Oscilloscope), introducing break-out star Helena Howard as the title character, who got the leading role in a theater piece being staged by a director (Molly Parker) who seems to want to revolve the piece around Madeline’s life including her dysfunctional relationship with her mother (Miranda July). This is a fascinating film that definitely veers into the art film world of July’s own films like You and Me and Everyone We Know, but it has a quirky charm that keeps you invested throughout.
Opening in select theaters after a month-long run on DirecTV is Jean-Stéphane Sauvaire’s A Prayer Before Dawn (A24) starring Peaky Blinders’ Joe Cole as an American kickboxer who ends up in a Thai prison after being busted for drugs. Once there, he needs to take on the savage environment while dealing with his own drug addiction, eventually getting back into kickboxing as a way to clean himself up and change his situation. I ended up enjoying this movie more than I thought I would
Another Sundance premiere that got a lot of buzz was Skate Kitchen (Magnolia), the new film from The Wolfpack director Crystal Moselle, this one a narrative film featuring the young women of Skate Kitchen, a Lower East Side skater crew who are joined by Camille (Rachelle Vinberg), a girl from Long Island whose mother (Elizabeth Rodriguez) doesn’t approve of her pastime. Also starring Jaden Smith, Moselle’s film is an interesting mix of established actors and non-actors, although I wasn’t really into the seemingly non-scripted format, very similar to another Sundance movie coming out next week. I guess I wish there was more of a narrative rather than the young women talking about personal issues, but maybe that’s just me. It opens at the IFC Center in New York Friday (with Moselle and the Skate Kitchen in person) then expands to other cities next week.
Fresh off its premiere at the Sundance Film Festival’s Midnight section is RKSS’s Summer of 84 (Gunpowder and Sky) involving a group of 15-year-olds who think that a police officer in their neighborhood might actually be a serial killer, so they start their own investigation.
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Fresh from its debut at the New York Asian Film Festival and the Phillippines is Erik Matti’s BuyBust (Well GO USA), a police thriller starring Anne Curtis as anti-narcotics special operative Nina Manigan, who is trying to take down the drug cartels of Manila, while also facing dirty cops and bloodthirsty citizens. It opens in select cities this weekend.
Well GO is also opening Huang Bo’s Chinese dramedy The Island about a meteorite bound for earth that doesn’t have much effect on the life of Ma Jin (played by Huang himself) who daydreams of winning the lottery and having a romance with his colleague Shanshan (Qi Shu), but when the event happens, he ends up shipwrecked on an island with some of the coworkers and the winning lottery ticket.
(Continuing where I left off….)
Mia Rose Frampton stars in Jack C. Newell’s teen drama Hope Springs Eternal (Samuel Goldwyn) as Hope, a girl dying of cancer whose condition has increased her popularity, but when she discovers she’s cured, how will all her new friends react? I haven’t seen the movie, but boy, am I able to relate to this as a cancer survivor myself. This will be on VOD and in select theaters.
Gravitas Ventures offers two new genre films this weekend, the apocalyptic thriller What Still Remains (with Strike the Sun Entertainment) from first-time director Josh Mendoza, which will hit VOD on August 14, and Along Came the Devil (Gravitas Ventures), a supernatural thriller directed by Jason DeVan (Mindless) and starring Jessica Barth from Happy Death Day and more. The latter about a teen girl who tries to contact the spirit world will be available On Demand at the same time as its theatrical release.
You can check out the trailers for each below:
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Also opening at the IFC Center is Elizabeth Harvest (IFC Films), the new film from Sebastian Gutierez (aka Carla Gugino’s partner), this one starring Australian supermodel Abbey Lee as the title character who arrives at the estate of her scientist husband Henry (Ciaran Hinds), but is treated poorly by the staff (Gugino and Matthew Beard) and told that’s she’s forbidden from a locked room, which of course, she investigates as soon as Henry goes away.
I haven’t seen it, but I imagine the best thing going for Nick Fituri Scown’s directorial debut Pretty Bad Actress (MVD Entertainment Group) is that it stars the comedic great Jillian Bell (22 Jump Street, Rough Night), but it’s loosely based on the story of Theresa Saldana who was almost killed by a stalker but who starred in the TV-movie about her own ordeal. This one stars Heather McComb as former child star Gloria Green who has a similar experience. It will open at L.A.’s Arena Cinemalounge and be on Digital Friday.
From Bollywood comes Vishwaroop 2(Reliance Entertainment), directed and starring Kamal Haasan, and also out in New York at the Village East is the Icelandic film The Swan (Synergetic) from Ása Helga Hjörleifsdóttir, which will open in L.A. at the Laemmle Royal on August 17. The latter is a drama based on Guðbergur Bergsson’s coming-of-age novel about a 9-year-old girl who goes to visit her relatives in the country where she befriends a farmhand.
Let’s get to some repertory programming in NYC, which is specifically for those who live in New York… or don’t mind travelling.
We’ll start off with the Metrograph who are presenting the first North American retrospective for Anime filmmaker Makoto Shinkai, whose film Your Name. was a blockbuster hit in Japan and breakout hit over here – it even made my Top 3 last year, so I know I’ll try to catch some of his other films. The Metrograph also offers a Rialto Pictures’ restoration of former army cameraman Pierre Schoendoerffer’s 1965 war film The 317thPlatoon, starring Jacques Perrin and others, the story of the occupying French army caught in the difficult politics of the Indochina War. The IFC Center will debut a new 25thanniversary restoration of Martin Scorsese’s The Age of Innocence, starring Daniel Day Lewis, while the Quadpresents a 40thAnniversary restoration of Diane Kurys’ French coming-of-age film Peppermint Soda.
Lastly, Netflix presents the original comedy film The Package about a group of teens who need to put a friend back together after an unfortunate spring break accident… you can probably guess from the title or the image on the Netflix site what body part the friend loses.
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André Bishop, head of Lincoln Center Theater: $1 million
Todd Haimes, Roundabout: $922,000.
Oskar Eustis the Public Theater: $659,000
Lynne Meadows, MTC: $565,000
Carole Rothman, Second Stage $191,000
James Nicola, New York Theatre Workshop: $178,000
These are the latest known annual compensation for the artistic heads of NYC non-profit theaters, compiled by Philip Boroff in Broadway Journal, who judiciously explains the artistic and financial accomplishments of each, and points out their sacrifices: Rothman’s salary represents a 50 percent paycut from her previous annual compensation while fundraising for the Hayes.
“Not-for-profit leaders forego the potential windfall that commercial producers earn from a blockbuster, in favor of a job with steady income. Yet some company trustees and foundation leaders privately call the biggest nonprofit packages excessive, the appearance of which can deter donors.”
November Theater Openings
Alia Shawkat in “The Second Woman”
October Quiz
The Week in New York Theater Reviews
Aran Murphyas Hamnet, in person and projected onto the screen, along with Bush Moukarzel as his father Shakespeare
Hamnet and the absent (projected) Shakespeare, his father
Hamnet
William Shakespeare’s only son, named Hamnet, died when he was 11 years old; a few years later, the playwright wrote “Hamlet.” The Irish theater troupe Dead Centre conjures up the Bard’s boy in the hour-long “Hamnet,” a whimsical, tender, technically innovative avant-garde play that features an extraordinary performance by a 12-year-old named Aran Murphy.
He Did What?
a ten-minute animated opera that was projected for free onto the wall of BAM’s Peter Jay Sharp building nightly from 7 to 10 p.m
Raul Esparza as a temperamental chef in “Seared”
W. Tre Davis
Raul Esparza and Krysta Rodriguez
Seared
Theresa Rebeck’s slight but savory comedy about running a restaurant stars Raúl Esparza as Harry, a hilariously mercurial chef-owner of a hole-in-the-wall eatery that’s become the latest foodie destination. A blurb in New York Magazine has praised Harry’s ginger lemongrass scallops dish, so now the customers are flocking to the place and clamoring for the dish.
But Harry refuses to make it anymore.
“I’m not feeling the scallops,” he says.
Freestyle Love Supreme
Freestyle Love Supreme, the hip-hop improv group,is not so much Lin-Manuel Miranda’s Broadway follow-up to “Hamilton” as it is a subsidiary of Lin-Manuel Inc. …It is designed to feel good-natured and informal, like friends sitting around a dorm room at Wesleyan, even though there are 766 of us and we’re at the Booth Theater…That goodwill goes a long way.
Fear
Two adults are standing over a teenager named Jamie who is tied to a chair. Phil, a plumber, has kidnapped Jamie, and dragged him into this abandoned tool shed in the woods outside Princeton, New Jersey. Ethan, a professor, is trying to rescue Jamie…An eight-year-old girl from the neighborhood is missing, and Phil (Enrico Colantoni, who plays the genial father in Veronica Mars), has reason to suspect that Jamie (Alexander Garfin) has something to do with it. Or does he?…A play that requires a vigorous suspension of disbelief. Yet, if you can get over that hurdle, it offers three good actors constantly playing with our perspective – not only about who did what but such issues as moral relativism, class tensions, and…fear
The Sound Inside
“The Sound Inside” is a dark drama by Adam Rapp that keeps us in the dark, literally and figuratively, which works better while watching it on stage than thinking about it afterwards. Mary-Louise Parker portrays a middle-aged Yale professor named Bella Lee Baird, who prefers literature to life, and expects to die soon; she tells us she’s been diagnosed with cancer. Bella slowly develops a friendship with 18-year-old Christopher Dunn (Will Hochman), one of the students in her course…They turn out to share a taste in books, especially dark tales like Dostoevsky’s “Crime and Punishment,” which is one of so many book titles name-dropped during the course of the play that the script could serve as a reading list (which I include in the review.)
Monsoon Season
Lizzie Vieh’s black comedy about a divorced couple permanently underwater in Phoenix Arizona, is clever and merciless, but it is also oddly compassionate….Danny and his ex-wife Julia may be losers who constantly make laughably wrong choices, but they are trying to do right, to be better.
The Week in New York Theater News
“The Minutes,” Tracy Letts’ most political play to date, will have its first preview on February 25, as this cryptic e-mail revealed. No theater or cast have been announced. The play, which premiered at the Steppenwolf Theater in Chicago in 2017, is about a City Council meeting in the fictional town called Big Cherry that turns ominous. Letts began work on it before the 2016 election,
“The play is not about Trump or Trumpism — I don’t find him a particularly complicated figure — but it is about this contentious moment we’re having in American politics in the last few years,”
Andrew Garfield will star in the Netflix adaptation of Rent playwright Jonathan Larson’s autobiographical musical tick…tick…BOOM, directed by Lin-Manuel Miranda.
Lear deBessonet will lead Encores! starting officially in the 2021 season, succeeding Jack Viertel
Samira Wiley and Dominic Fumusa will star In Molière in the Park‘s “The School for Wives” in Prospect Park, November 13 and 14 FREE.
Thomas Finkelpearl is leaving his job as cultural affairs commissioner after five years. “The timing of it is suspect,” councilman Jimmy Van Bramer, chair of the city council’s cultural affairs committee, told NY1. Some speculate he’s unfairly taking the fall for the various controversies and glitches over the city’s plan to build more statues honoring women and people of color. Finkelpearl helped spearhead the city’s efforts to tie its funding to the diversity of arts institutions’ employees and board members under the cultural plan, unveiled in 2017.
Billy Porter, performer, now playwright
Idina Menzel, Lea Michele and Billy Porter will be among those performing at the 93rd annual Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade
Remember when Billy Porter performed at the parade in 2013, as Lola in Kinky Boots? and conservatives were outraged? Have times changed?
Times Square is presenting its first annual Show Globes, displaying giant snow globe-like sculptures of Dear Evan Hansen, Wicked, Ain’t Too Proud, and The Lion King. On Broadway Plaza in Times Square between 44th and 45th streets through December 26.
2020 Seasons
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2020 Under the Radar Festival celebrates its 16th season with a line-up of groundbreaking artists across the U.S. and around the world, including Australia, Chile, China, Japan, Mexico, Palestine, Taiwan, and the UK.
92nd Street Y’s Lyrics and Lyricists
Yip Harburg
Jan 25-27
Jerry Herman
Feb 22-24
George Gershwin
March 21-23
Stephen Schwartz and Broadway’s Next Generation (featuring Schwartz and Ns Marcy Heisler & Zina Goldrich, John Bucchino, Khiyon Hursey)
April 18-20
George Abbott and the Making of the American Musical
May 30-June 1
Lincoln Center’s American Songbook Series
Andre De Shields January 29
Joe Iconis Feb 1
Ali Stroker Feb 28
Theatre Row, a six-theatre complex located on 42nd Street in Midtown Manhattan, has announced the Off-Off-Broadway companies that will be making work at its spaces, as part of the complex’s new Kitchen Sink Residency. The two-year program will give the companies space to develop new work, culminating in a three-week production run. The companies are the Assembly, Broken Box Mime Theater, LubDub Theatre Company, Noor Theatre, and Superhero Clubhouse.
The Critic Unmellowed
From Wall Street Journal interview with John Simon, 94:
“His penchant for criticizing actors’ and actresses’ physical traits —he once wrote unkindly about Liza Minnelli’s face, and another time about Barbra Streisand’s nose— has also helped to make him repugnant to the city’s cultural elite. He contended at the time, and again to me, that such criticism is entirely legitimate if a performer fails to transcend his or her defects of appearance by force of talent.” (How does one “transcend” one’s appearance?)
On how theater has not declined:
“Things were never very good,” he says.“I don’t really see a decline. Looking back into the past always makes the past look better than it actually was,and the present worse, perhaps, than it actually is. . . Out of, I don’t know how many plays open in a season —a lot of them anyway—there may be two or three even worth bothering with. It has always been so.”
Rest in Peace
Bernard Slade, 89, creator of the TV series “The Flying Nun” and “The Partridge Family,” but we know him as the Broadway playwright of “Same Time, Next Year,” a long-running and widely-produced stage comedy.
Andile Gumbi , 36, former Simba of Broadway’s The Lion King. He died of cardiac arrest while in Israel , Gumbi was portraying the lead role of King Nebuchadnezzar in Daniel The Musical at the Jerusalem Theater.
A memorial for Eric LaJuan Summers will be held on Nov 4th, 2019 at 9:30pm at The Green Room 42 on W42nd Street & 10th Ave. Members of the Broadway community will be performing.
Non-Profit Pays! Letts’ Turn to Politics. #Stageworthy News of the Week André Bishop, head of Lincoln Center Theater: $1 million Todd Haimes, Roundabout: $922,000. Oskar Eustis the Public Theater: $659,000…
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It’s time for our weekly Diamond Comics Shipping List! Check out some great titles IDW has in store for us next week like Transformers, G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero, My Little Pony, Star Trek, Star Wars Adventures, and more! All coming your way for May 1st!
TRANSFORMERS #5
Brian Ruckley (A) Angel Hernandez, Ron Joseph (CVR A) Sara Pitre-Durocher (CVR B) Umi Miyao
Prowl and Chromia are investigating the disappearance of a missing scientist in the wilds of Cybertron when a mysterious figure crosses their path. Who is he and what does he know about the disappeared scientist? And where is Bumblebee disappearing to at all odd hours? Transformers-now shipping twice monthly! All your favorite Transformers characters as you’ve never seen them before!
GI JOE REAL AMERICAN HERO SILENT OPTION TP
Larry Hama, Ryan Ferrier (A) Netho Diaz, Kenneth Loh (CVR) Luca Pizzari
ADVANCE SOLICITED FOR APRIL RELEASE! Featuring the return of the new Snake Eyes-breakout character Dawn Moreno-and the first appearance of Agent Helix in the Real American Hero universe! Following in the bloody footsteps of the smash-hit “Dawn of the Arashikage” story arc comes the newest chapter in Dawn Moreno’s journey, joining a special rescue team led by Bombstrike. It’s her first (un)official mission as a JOE… but it may be her last and nobody will ever know. That’s because, when Agent Helix is involved, the only option is the Silent Option. Collects the four issue miniseries, plus the short origin story “Codename Helix.”
MY LITTLE PONY FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC #77
Katie Cook (A/CVR A) Andy Price (CVR B) Sara Richard
With stars aligning, villains escaping, and princesses out of commission, can Equestria’s favorite ponies find a way to defeat Cosmos-before it’s too late?! Cosmos is freed, and it’s going to take a little bit of magic-and a lot of friendship-to stop her!
GOOSEBUMPS HORRORS OF THE WITCH HOUSE #1
Denton J. Tipton, Matthew Dow Smith (A/CVR) Chris Fenoglio
When young tech entrepreneur Veruca Curry buys the old Whaley House, the kids in town are worried the ghosts who haunt it will get her. But when they discover Veruca’s horrible secret, it will turn their world upside-down!
HOUSE AMOK TP VOL 01
Christopher Sebela (A/CVR) Shawn McManus
ADVANCE SOLICITED FOR MARCH RELEASE! It’s the summer vacation from hell! Ten-year-old twin Dylan Sandifer and her family have fallen down a rabbit hole full of secret implants, conspiracy theories, Mandela effects, invaders, and organ thieves. As the attacks intensify, the Sandifers light out across the country in search of answers and salvation, blazing a bloody path of arson and murder.
MARVEL ACTION AVENGERS #4
Matthew K. Manning (A/CVR) Jon Sommariva
Magic and mayhem collide for more mighty Marvel action in this new adventure featuring Earth’s Mightiest Heroes! Thor, Captain Marvel, and Doctor Strange have gone missing! Forced to face fiendish foes without their teammates, can the rest of the Avengers find their friends before it’s too late? And what’s this about a ruby?! It’s an adventure you’ll need to see, True Believers! Earth’s Mightiest Heroes tackle adventures perfect for young and old readers alike! Jump in to Marvel action as you’ve never seen it before! All your favorite heroes are here: team up with Captain America, Black Panther, Black Widow, and more!
MARVEL ACTION SPIDER-MAN #3
Delilah S Dawson (A/CVR) Fico Ossio
As if Peter Parker didn’t have enough problems at high school, suddenly New York’s crawling with Spider-People! Peter has no choice but to forge a tentative partnership with Miles Morales and Gwen Stacy, as a larger mystery threatens the trio! All-new web-swinging action in the Mighty Marvel Manner!
SONIC THE HEDGEHOG ANNUAL 2019
Ian Flynn, James Kochalka, More (A) Jonathan Gray, Jack Lawrence, More (CVR A) Yuji Uekawa, Sonic Team (CVR B) Jennifer Hernandez
In Sonic’s world, adventure awaits around every corner, but even the world’s fastest hedgehog can’t be at the center of all of it! Join Sonic and some of his coolest friends in adventures that show just how wonderful Sonic’s world really is. In the lead story, the odd couple of Tangle the Lemur and Whisper the Wolf team-up to save a friend in need! Then Sonic and Tails take the Tornado for a spin, but is Sonic going too fast? Plus, Silver and Blaze slow down for a minute to go gardening, the Sonic Fan Club has their first official meeting, and Rouge the Bat hunts for treasure!
Incredible creators working on Sonic for the first time-including James Kochalka (Johnny Boo), Cavan Scott (Star Adventures) and Jack Lawrence (Transformers: Lost Light)!
• Celebrating Sonic’s first year at IDW!
• Cover by Yuji Uekawa of Sonic Team, designer of the Modern Sonic characters!
STAR TREK TNG TERRA INCOGNITA TP
Scott Tipton, David Tipton (A) Tony Shasteen, Angel Hernandez, Carlos Nieto (CVR) J. K. Woodward
ADVANCE SOLICITED FOR APRIL RELEASE! Following their clash with their villainous doubles from the Mirror Universe, the Enterprise crew returns to business as usual, little realizing the serpent in their midst-one of their own has been replaced! Six stories focusing on fan-favorite crew members of the Enterprise-D-including Deanna Troi, Wesley Crusher, and Selar-each connected by the machinations of this sinister doppelganger. What does Mirror Barclay want, and what’s to become of his Prime-universe counterpart?!
Following the blockbuster MIRROR BROKEN and THROUGH THE MIRROR storylines comes a brand-new Next Generation series, featuring untold tales of the U.S.S. Enterprise-D!
STAR WARS ADVENTURES FLIGHT OF FALCON
Michael Moreci (A/CVR) Arianna Florean
The Flight of the Falcon ends here! We’ve followed Bazine Netal’s quest for the legendary starship the Millennium Falcon, but here’s one final tale yet to be told, featuring famous pirate captain, Hondo Ohnaka!
TMNT ONGOING TP VOL 21 BATTLE LINES
Kevin Eastman, Tom Waltz (A) Michael Dialynas (A/CVR) Dave Wachter
Advance solicited for May release! The countdown to issue #100 begins! The longest running TMNT series continues as new dangers and enemies force the Turles to make tough choices! Multiple sources of conflict collide as the maniacal Agent Bishop goes to war with the alien forces on Earth, driving the Turtles to embrace unsavory alliances and race to stop a massacre. But this complex web of enemies and allies-as well as new divisions between the Turtles themselves-may thwart any chance they have for success! Collects issues #86-90.
TMNT URBAN LEGENDS #12
Gary Carlson (A/CVR A&B) Frank Fosco (CVR B) Erik Larsen
The fallout! With Donatello offline and Deathwatch still on the loose, it’s up to Leo and Mikey-accompanied by some intergalactic help-to catch the infamous killer, while Ralph-back home in New York-takes on a much more familiar foe: the mob, hellbent on getting Casey’s daughter back! The entire TMNT Volume 3 run-all 23 issues-reprinted in full color for the first time!
UNCLE SCROOGE #44
Alberto Savini, Jan Gilbert (A) Nicola Tosolini, Andrea Ferraris (CVR) Marco Mazzarello
When an important client comes to town, Uncle Scrooge must rely on Donald and Fethry Duck to serve not just double duty, but triple and quadruple duty as they take on a variety of roles in “The Crowded Newsroom!” Then, when Scrooge’s tax bill skyrockets, Donald comes up with an unusual way for his uncle to make some much-needed cash in “Bin World.”
UNCLE SCROOGE MY FIRST MILLIONS TP
Fausto Vitaliano (A) Marco Mazzarello, Stefano Intini, Giampaolo Soldati (A/CVR) Paolo Mottura
Advance solicited for April release! Travel back in time to Scrooge’s younger days to explore the origins of everyone’s favorite miser! Find out how Uncle Scrooge made his first, second, third, and fourth millions in a four-part story that answers all our burning questions about how Scrooge McDuck got so very, very rich-and so very, very stingy! It’s Uncle Scrooge like you’ve never seen him before!
Join the IDW Hasbro Shared Universe related conversation here in our Comics Discussion and Reviews section and here for all other franchises, superheroes, or general comic book discussions! Not a member? Join our community by creating your own free account here! Or jump right into the live chat on our Discord server or our Facebook Group!
IDW Comics Shipping List for May 1st! It’s time for our weekly Diamond Comics Shipping List! Check out some great titles IDW has in store for us next week like
#Avengers#Comics#Diamond Shipping List#Disney#Disney Afternoon#DuckTales#G.I. Joe#G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero#Goosebumps#Hasbro#IDW#IDW Publishing#Marvel Action#MLP#MLP: FIM#My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic#Sonic the Hedgehog#Sonic The Hedgehog Annual#Spider-Man#Star Trek#Star Trek TNG: Terra Incognita#Star Trek: The Next Generation#Star Wars Adventures#Tales from Vader&039;s Castle#Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles#TMNT#Uncle Scrooge#Walt Disney Comics
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We've been enlisted to do yet another Summer Blockbuster Review. The government wants us to inform the citizenry of their compulsory big expensive studio movie watching duties.
#mst3k#mystery science theater 3000#crow t robot#tom servo#mike nelson#michael j nelson#second annual summer blockbuster review
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In a comeback season for Hollywood, a summer without bombs
NEW YORK — Have you noticed something oddly tranquil about this summer movie season? For the first time in recent memory, there hasn’t been one major bomb.
Usually by now, there would be blockbuster-sized craters left on the charred summer-movie battlefield, the inevitable toll of Hollywood’s most high-stakes season. But this year, summer-movie bomb-watching, long one of the most dependable spectator sports of the season, has gone entirely without the sight of a “Lone Ranger”-sized mushroom cloud.
After the cataclysmic, the-sky-is-falling summer of 2017, when overall grosses slid 14.6 per cent from the year before, Hollywood has rebounded. Ticket sales in North America this summer are up 11.3 per cent, according to comScore. The comeback is even more pronounced when you factor in that the annual Marvel movie kickoff to summer slid just ahead of the official first weekend of May start, shifting the $678.5 million domestic for Disney’s “Avenger: Infinity War” to the spring.
Amid a remarkably turbulent time for the movie business, this summer has been surprisingly, almost weirdly, steady.
“The studios did what they were supposed to,” said Kyle Davies, domestic distribution chief for Paramount Pictures. “This notion that people are tired of going to the theatres, I don’t believe it for a second. I think people are ready every weekend: ‘Give me a reason to come.”‘
Paramount didn’t have a lot of releases over the summer but coming off the spring success of “A Quiet Place,” Davies said, “Things have turned around.” “Mission: Impossible — Fallout,” the sixth installment in the Tom Cruise franchise, is approaching $500 million worldwide, and the Diane Keaton-Jane Fonda-starring “Book Club” has, with $68.6 million, fared better than most comedies this year.
But even Tom Cruise, despite all his powers, can do only so much to tip the overall box office. So what’s behind the bounce back?
MoviePass, the flailing subscription service, has claimed responsibility. Subscription moviegoing has surely had an additive effect, bringing more regular visitors to theatres. But how much? There’s no statistical evidence of MoviePass boosting bottom lines, and studio executives downplay its influence as minimal. (“Mission: Impossible,” for one, wasn’t available on MoviePass.) MoviePass, which this week reduced its plan to three movies a month, says it accounts for 6 per cent of all domestic tickets.
Mid-summer, AMC trotted out its own $20-a-month subscription option, attracting 260,000 subscribers in its first seven weeks. AMC on Thursday said that’s translated to about 1 million admissions or about 4 per cent of U.S. moviegoers at AMC theatres, the country’s largest chain.
Jeff Bock, senior box-office analyst for Exhibitor Relations, said it’s difficult to extrapolate how big a driver subscription services have been, though he credited the copious attention and drama around MoviePass with fueling moviegoing awareness. He’s more inclined to point to the improved studio project, specifically sequels like “Incredibles 2,” “Ant-Man and the Wasp” and “Deadpool 2.”
“The one thing that was very different from last year’s sequels is that people wanted to see these. That’s what it comes down to,” said Bock. “You can say Hollywood’s running on good credit and that’s probably one of the reasons people are coming out weekend after weekend.”
The difference in Pixar releases alone accounts for a yawning $440 million gap. Last summer, the little-loved “Cars 3” grossed $152.9 million domestically; this year, “Incredibles 2,” the summer’s biggest smash, has earned $590.3 million in North America.
The season hasn’t been without its worrisome blips. Two of the most dependable forces in moviegoing — “Star Wars” and the Rock — both showed that they’re mortal. But even those disappointments were measured. “Solo,” while cause for real concern for “Star Wars” going forward, still nearly cleared $400 million worldwide. Dwayne Johnson’s “Skyscraper,” saved by sales in China, managed to gross almost $300 million worldwide.
But the final two weeks of August should only pad the season’s lead. After scoring $5 million in its opening day Wednesday, Warner Bros.’ “Crazy Rich Asians” — hailed as a watershed moment for Asian-American representation in mainstream moviemaking — appears poised to ride glowing reviews to approximately a five-day $25 million debut. Following last weekend’s chart-topping “The Meg,” a shark thriller, Warner Bros. will likely account for the summer’s only two original, non-sequel no. 1 releases.
“It’s content. When you look at last year, there wasn’t much beside “Wonder Woman” and “Dunkirk” that really clicked,” said Jeff Goldstein, Warner Bros.’ distribution head. “When we’ve had dips, it’s when the movies haven’t delivered.”
On the indie side, business has been slower, though A24 notched its highest grossing release with Ari Aster’s acclaimed horror film “Hereditary” ($79.3 million worldwide). Spike Lee’s recently released “BlacKkKlansman,” for Focus Features, has added a jolt to the often sleepy August period, landing the director his best opening weekend in 12 years.
But the most unexpected sensations of the summer have been documentaries. There will be three docs to clear $10 million in box office, an unprecedented high for non-fiction filmmaking. “Won’t You Be My Neighbour” is up to $21.8 million for Focus, Neon’s “Three Identical Strangers” has hauled in $9.7 million, and Magnolia’s Ruth Bader Ginsberg documentary “RBG” has grossed $13.7 million.
“It’s a zeitgeist moment, no doubt,” said David Linde, chief executive of Participant Media, which co-produced “RBG.” “People go to the theatre for a unique experience and that experience is all about a collective experience. That hasn’t ever been truer.”
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Follow AP Film Writer Jake Coyle on Twitter at: http://twitter.com/jakecoyleAP
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Talk Is Jericho – Super Summer Movie Preview with Team Tiger Awesome It's the Second Annual Summer Movie Preview with Team Tiger Awesome, but the question remains, do ANY of this Summer's most anticipated, potential blockbusters ACTUALLY get reviewed?
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WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND – Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation, Skyscraper and More
With the 4thof July behind us, there are only a few more weeks of July, then we hit August where things can slow down considerably. Every summer, there’s at least one weekend where two movies both have great potential to be #1, and this week is no exception as we have a second sequel to a hit animated movie featuring Adam Sandler and friends, while Dwayne Johnson -- arguably one of the biggest Hollywood stars right now -- offers us something we haven’t seen much this summer… an original movie!
HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA 3: SUMMER VACATION (Sony)
I honestly couldn’t tell you if I’ve seen Hotel Transylvania 2, because I just can’t remember, but I did see the original Hotel Transylvania, probably sometime before the Toronto International Film Festival where it premiered. Honestly, I wasn’t too surprised that it was another hit for Adam Sandler before moving over to Netflix, but I didn’t realize it would be his biggest hit.
The original Hotel Transylvania opened in late September 2012 with $42.5 million, the second highest opening for Sandler after The Longest Yard, which got some help by opening on Memorial Day. Its sequel opened three years later with $48.5 million, trashing Sandler’s previous record on its way to $169.7 million, which is also a record for Sandler… and then he went over to Netflix and has been there ever since. It’s hard to believe but this will be Sandler’s first nationwide theatrical release in three years, although it’s hard to tell whether his presence of that of any of the voice cast will be that much of a draw rather than the characters and situation.
Family cruises are fairly typical things these days that will give this film a relatability that might have been missing from the previous movies, although we’re still dealing with a comedy featuring some of the greatest movie monsters of all time (or rather versions of them). Animation king Genndy Tartakovsky is back helming the third movie, this time co-writing it as well, as Sandler focuses on his Netflix stuff but still provides his voice and sense of humor as well as all his friends… and the always great Mel Brooks once again voices Dracula’s father.
Not sure what more can be said about Hotel Transylvania 3 other than the fact it’s the first in the series to get a summer release (after getting a kick-off at Cannes!), and it has a number of distinct advantages over Dwayne Johnson’s new action-thriller Skyscraper in that it will be in more theaters (over 4,000) and it has relatively little family competition, basically The Incredibles II in its fifth weekend (so that will likely lose a few hundred screens).
Another thing to consider is that family sequels don’t always do well as previous movies, although that hasn’t always been the case with animated movies (as was the case with Pixar’s sequels). That said, last year’s Despicable Me 3 had a noticeable dip from the previous movie, though.
It seems likely that this movie will have another $40 million plus opening, but we’ll have to see if it does more than $45 million or spreads its business out over the rest of summer, and Hotel Transylvania 3 should be good for $130 million or so domestically.
SKYSCRAPER (Legendary/Universal)
Next up is that Dwayne Johnson movie, an action-thriller that reunites him with Central Intelligence director Rawson Marshall Thurber, as well as with Legendary and Universal, the latter who wisely brought Johnson onto 2011’s Fast Five, which in turn helped solidify the former WWE superstar as a bankable box office star.
Central Intelligence did well enough in the summer of 2016 by teaming Johnson with Kevin Hart to the tune of $127 million domestic and $217 million worldwide that Johnson and Thurber looked for another project when Skyscrapercame along. By now, you’ve already seen the trailer which makes the movie look a lot like a modern-day pastiche of Die Hard meets The Towering Inferno with Johnson trying to rescue his family, who are trapped high up in a skyscraper. This is new territory for Thurber, who had comedy hits with 2004′s Dodgeball (a cult classic, for sure) and 2013’s We’re the Millers before directing Johnson and Hart in their 2016 hit.
Johnson had an interesting year in 2017, as The Fate of the Furious dipped from 2015’s franchise record-holder Furious 7, but still grossed $226 million domestic. Paramount’s failed Baywatch remake followed a month later, and that bombed with just $58 million domestic, but Johnson ended the year with Sony’s Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle, which reunited him with Hart. That opened meekly with $36.2 million before Christmas, but then it exploded over the holidays and in January of this year, grossing an astonishing $404 million. That’s about as good an example as any that if a movie is good and funny and delivers an experience as good or better than trailers, then it will have decent legs. In April, Johnson starred in Rampage, which looked like a summer blockbuster with giant monsters, but that barely hit $100 million after opening with around $36 million.
In fact, a $35 to 36 million opening is a pretty solid benchmark for Johnson other than Baywatch, and reviews which broke on Tuesday have generally been better than expected.
Basically, this should end up in that same $35 to 36 million range, which puts it in direct competition with last week’s Ant-Man and the Wasp for second place, and that should be a fairly tight race. Then again, with the summer heat and humidity and audiences looking for something to see, this could be a better choice than the Marvel movie and the animated one, so it could break out and surprise.
Mini-Review: Let’s face it that if you’re interested in seeing this movie, it’s because you’re a fan of Dwayne Johnson, and Johnson’s fans probably won’t be disappointed, because Skyscrapergives him another chance to basically be… Dwayne Johnson. It’s actually kind of funny that an actor with so little range could become one of the world’s biggest action stars, but maybe that’s what’s necessary, since none of the past great – Schwarzenegger, Stallone, Willis, Van Damme, etc. – had that much range, but they were good at doing what they did, and people loved them for it.
In this case, Johnson is Will Sawyer, some sort of military hostage negotiator who is injured on duty but has an opportunity to get a job as the security advisor for the hi-tech Hong Kong high-rise The Pearl. In fact, he moves his whole family in as the Pearl is getting ready to open its residential floors, but he soon learns that the friend who got him the gig is actually part of a plan to destroy the tower and its billionaire creator Zhao Long Ji (Chin Han) by the evil mercenary Kores Botha (Roland Møller).
That’s probably the best I can do with the plot since I was pretty distracted as the film started by a group of “seat-fillers” being herded in, including the one who knocked over a large soda that was pooling by my feet as the film began. Needless to say, it’s a far more complicated plot than should be necessary in trying to explain what the bad guys are doing there and how Will’s family ends up trapped in this enormous building on fire.
Sure, there are lots of questions and problems because the general concept is so ridiculous at times, as is The Pearl itself. While Will is being given the grand tour, he is shown so much high-tech stuff that clearly is only there to act as a plot device later in the film, and that’s exactly what happens. But Johnson himself is quite good, as is Neve Campbell, who is terrific as his wife, and even the kids are decent, but they can’t make up for some of the over-the-top performances from Møller and Noah Taylor as the building’s insurance broker who is so clearly tied to the terrorists.
Put it this way, Skyscraper is better than Central Intelligence in the same way that Rampage was better than San Andreas, and this is about as much fun as Rampage despite it not being even remotely a comedy and being more in the disaster realm of San Andreas. Got all that?
There are more than enough nail-biting moments and solid action scenes that you can almost forgive the weak script and the low-budget casting to allow the majority of the budget to be used on the CG-heavy setting and Johnson himself.
Rating: 7/10
SORRY TO BOTHER YOU (Annapurna Pictures)
Beyond the two wide releases, Annapurna Pictures will be expanding Boots Riley’s much-lauded directorial debut into 805 theaters* on Friday and with so many weak offerings in the bottom half of the top 10, there’s a good chance it can end up as high as 7thplace with just under $4 million. It’s all going to depend on how many theaters Sicario and Uncle Drew retain, since they’re shooting for around the same general $3.5 to 4 million territory.
Marvel Studios’ Ant-Man and the Wasp opened below expectations, probably not helped by it being released during the quiet weekend post 4thof July, but we’ll have to see how it holds up in its second weekend, because it has direct competition for family audiences and for older males from the new movies.
1. Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation (Sony Pictures Animation) - $43.6 million N/A
2. Skyscraper (Legendary/Universal) - $36.3 million N/A
3. Ant-Man and the Wasp (Marvel/Disney) - $35 million -54%
4. The Incredibles 2 (Disney-Pixar) - $17.1 milliom -40%
5. Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (Universal) - $13.5 million -53%
6. The First Purge (Blumhouse/Universal) - $8 million -55%
7. Sorry to Bother You (Annapurna) - $4 million*
8. Sicario: Day of the Soldado (Sony) - $3.6 million
9. Uncle Drew (Lionsgate) - $3.5 million
10. Ocean’s 8 (Warner Bros.) - $3 million -40%
*Upped this number to reflect the 800+ theaters that will be playing Boots Riley’s directorial debut
Before I get to this week’s limited releases, I want to give a shout-out to the annual FANTASIA INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL of Montreal, which kicks off on Thursday with the World Premiere of Mick Garris’ Nightmare Cinema, the Asian film Last Child and Daniel Roby’s Dans la Brume. One can expect a bunch of movies that have played previous festivals like Fantastic Fest and Sundance including Panos Costmatos’ Mandy, starring Nicolas Cage and Andrea Riseborough, Piercing, Summer of ’84 and Anna and the Apocalypse (none of which I’ve seen yet!), while also having a premiere screening of Blumhouse’s upcoming horror sequel Unfriended: Dark Web. I’m still dying to see Jenn Wexler’s The Ranger, the directorial debut from Larry Fessenden’s wife/producer, and I’m also interested in Yoko Yamanaka’s Amiko and Robert Krzykowski’s The Man Who Killed Hitler and Then the Bigfoot, starring the great Sam Elliot, who will be there in person.I’m not going to be able to go to Montreal this year for the festival, which runs through early August, but I hope to catch some of the films I haven’t seen remotely via links once the World Cup ends.
LIMITED RELEASES
There are two really solid specialty releases this weekend and another one that’s pretty decent. (And unfortunately, due to time issues, I wasn’t able to finish this up but will have the rest added by sometime Friday morning.)
Comedian, actor and musician Bo Burnham’s directorial debut Eighth Grade (A24) was one of my favorite movies from Sundance, this one starring newcomer Elsie Fisher as 13-year-old Kayla, who has to get through her last week of middle school with hopes of making a mark after being selected as “Most Quiet.” It’s an amazing coming-of-age film on par with last year’s Lady Bird that shows off the great talent of Fisher and Josh Hamilton as her father. I wrote more about this fantastic film out of Sundance, but don’t let this one pass you by because you may be worn out on coming of age films.
I also can highly recommend Rob Reiner’s Shock and Awe (Vertical/DirecTV), which is getting a moderate release into a couple hundred theaters this weekend. This one is a political drama about the reporters at the small Knight Ridder news network, who questioned America’s decision to go to war in Iraq after 9/11. It stars Woody Harrelson, James Marsden, Tommy Lee Jones and Reiner himself as the journalist who tried to get the story on record and ended up being the only ones to “get it right.” Honestly, this is one of Reiner’s best films in years, pretty much his Spotlight or The Post, part of which can be credited to screenwriter Joey Hartstone, who was able to cull the life stories of journalists Joseph Galloway, Jonathan Landay, Warren Strobel and John Walcott into a fantastically entertaining film. Don’t miss this one either!
Also good and worth checking out is Gus Van Sant’s Don’t Worry He Won’t Get Far On Foot (Amazon), a biopic (of sorts) about Seattle cartoonist John Callahan, as played by Joaquin Phoenix, a man who was paralyzed after being a passenger in a drunk driving car accident (driven by a completely blotto Jack Black). The film follows John’s battle against alcoholism, helped by a new-agey guru, played by Jonah Hill, and an odd group of people offering support. The cast also includes Rooney Mara, Carrie Brownstein from Portlandia and Kim Gordon, formerly of Sonic Youth.
Another artist biopic is Gaugin: Voyage to Tahiti (Cohen Media), starring Vincent Cassel, which opened on Wednesday at the Quad and Paris Theaters in New York. I haven’t seen it but this film by Edouard Deluc is based on Gaugin’s memoir Noa Noa and it takes place around 1891 when the artist got tired of the civilized world and deserted his family to live in Tahiti where he finds hisnew muse Tehura.
Also, Keanu Reeves and Molly Ringwald star in Siberia (Saban Films), Matthew (Frank & Lola) Ross’ new thriller about a diamond merchant (Reeves) and his love being caught in a crossfire between buyers and federal agents when a deal goes wrong…. And hard to believe for Saban’s latest almost direct-to-digital movie, but reviews are atrocious.
I’m far more intrigued by Norwegian filmmaker Iram Haq’s What Will People Say (Kino Lorber), which opens in New York at the IFC Center and will open in L.A. at the Laemmle Music Hall on August 3. The semi-autobiographical film stars Maria Mozhdah as 16-year-old Nisha, living in Norway and trying to fit in while also being the perfect Pakistani daughter. When her father catches her with a boy, she’s sent to live her extended family in Pakistan, where she has to adapt.
This week’s IFC Midnight offering is Aislinn Clarke’s The Devil’s Doorway (IFC Midnight), which will also play the IFC Center on Friday and Saturday night. Set in Northern Ireland in 1960, it involves two Catholic priests who are sent to the Vatican to investigate a statue of the Virgin Mary weeping blood. There, they discover “a depraved horror show of sadistic nuns, satanism, and demonic possession” – sounds like MY kinda party.
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Some of this week’s docs…
Fans of jazz and swing might want to check out Jake Meginsky’s doc Milford Graves Full Mantis (Cinema Guild), opening at the Metrograph Friday then in L.A. on July 27. It’s not the usual talking heads music doc either, but it was a little too esoteric for my tastes, even though I dug the music and performances. Probably the most interesting aspect of this doc was going to Wikipedia to learn more about Graves and reading this:
“In 2013, Milford Graves along with Drs.Carlo Tremolada and Carlo Ventura received a patent for an invention that relates to a process of preparing a non-expanded tissue derivative, that is not subjected to cell proliferation in vitro, which has a vascular-stromal fraction enriched in stem and multipotent elements, such as pericytes and/or mesenchymal stem cells, or for preparing non-embryonic stem cells obtained from a tissue sample or from such tissue derivative, wherein the tissue derivative or such cells are subjected to vibrations derived from a heart sound to control the degree of differentiation or possible differentiation of the stem and multipotent elements into several other types of cells and optimize their potency. The invention relates also to a device for carrying out the process, to stem cells obtainable by the process as well as a drug for the regeneration of an animal tissue.”
(I was lost after that first sentence.)
I was even less of a fan of Jonathan Hacker’s Path of Blood (Paladin), based on his book of the same name, that assembles some raw footage of captured jihadi home movies filmed by a group of Muslim terrorists. To me, this was a little bit too much like found footage without commentary, which is certainly a valid documentary technique but not my favorite.
Sadly, I didn’t have an opportunity to see Kimberly Reed’s Dark Money (PBS), which opens at the IFC Center on Friday with tons of QnA opportunities, but it’s very timely in dealing with corporate money being used to influence elections and elected officials. Sound familiar? It premiered at Sundance and won the “David Carr Award for Truth in Non-Fiction Filmmaking” at the Montclair Film Festival, and if you don’t know who David Carr was, then please stop reading this column immediately. Thanks.
From Bollywood comes Shaad Ali’s Soorma (Sony Pictures Releasing), an inspiring sports drama about an athlete who came back after a freak accident.
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Hey, it's Three Kids On Bikes Man.
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Well, as long as it hits Leo Sayer, I'm fine with it.
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Really makes you think, doesn't it?
#mst3k#mystery science theater 3000#mike nelson#michael j nelson#second annual summer blockbuster review
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Alright, then... as long as you guys are going, I'll stay back.
#mst3k#mystery science theater 3000#mike nelson#armageddon#ben affleck#second annual summer blockbuster review
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And my hair is missing.
#mst3k#mystery science theater 3000#crow t robot#the x files#second annual summer blockbuster review
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Crow, you've got everything wrong.
#mst3k#mystery science theater 3000#mike nelson#michael j nelson#deep impact#second annual summer blockbuster review
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