reader: ya know there was this one couple i could tell they were supremely powerful people and it was only one night

the endless siblings hold their breaths they don't need

reader: they tried to convince me they were the king and queen of the fae but i didn't believe them

the endless siblings relax because for one second they thought you were gonna say you had an affair with their parents 😂

Desire: Oh thank god

Death leaning towards Desire: Do you think they …

Desire: With God?

Death nods

Desire: Anything is possibly so it seems

You: God? Now you are being ridiculous

Dream: My dear you have been with the Morningstar it seems you have an affinity for beings such as us

You: … well there was this one guy named Michael -

Everyone: HOW?!?

Destiny appearing: You have no idea

HIIII!!! at this point I might need a code name lol anyway more haremverse!

Reader actually meets destiny first and for once he is suprised when she does the opposite of everything she’s supposed to do in his book like if it says she sits down and bemoaned about her situation she jumps up and rambles about the political state of the world and how she would rather do ANYTHING else than marry a man her father has set up for her and she’s willing to do anything to get out of it .destiny is understandably confused flabbergasted and to be honest a little scared? I mean this has literally never happened before and as like an experiment of sorts he advises her to join the cult of dionises (still don’t know how to spell that and I refuse to learn!) so she can avoid getting married (which is where she meet Orpheus and things happen yada yada domino effect and all that) things is destiny had no idea sending her to the cult would have this kind of ripple effect and he is understandably very shocked when he hears about her saving his nephew and the subsequent affairs with all his siblings during the next few family dinners

You being a complete enigma to Destiny is good shit

Like his book will actually change after you do something and he is just in awe watching it all unfold. On one had yes he’s a little frightened but on the other you can actually surprise him and he loves it??? He loves you can be you and he can’t guess what you’ll do next

Also him putting you on this path to basically keep you safe in a way only to later learn you dated his whole family is hilarious 😂 it’s like the icarly ostrich meme

Destiny: What do you have there?

You with the whole endless family behind you along with Lucifer, Hob Gadling, Calliope, and others sprinkled in: … friends?

desire: your favourite ex is my twin?

reader: yeah i really like despair we had fun

desire: damn that's kinda hot that you loved my twin

dream: i wish i was still in that basement

You: Oh don’t be like that, Dream

Desire: Yeah, Dream, listen to them. They apparently have good taste despite currently dating you

Dream: …

Desire: Speaking of taste, it would fill me with such wondrous delight to know who is the best at sex? Who do you still desire? Or who did you have the best night with?

Dream: Dear sister please I beg of you, send me to the sunless lands

I also have a idea/blurb for the sandman harem

You decide to cook dinner for all of the endless (and Hob too). They all try to assure you that it’s not necessary but you say you just want to and they have no choice

Now, you have an open door policy with all your exs. You don’t care if they just pop in whenever. So, cue you cooking dinner with headphones on. Desire, Dream, Death, and Hob all arrive first. Death and Hob come early because they want to help you. Dream, being your current partner, of course comes early and Desire is early hoping to chat a bit.

They all stroll into the kitchen to see you lip syncing as you bob to the beat. They all just stop and just admire you for a moment

“So cute,” Death whispers

Hob chuckles while Dream has a loving gaze in his eyes. Desire, however, raised their eyebrow. Cute? Then a Cheshire smile spreads over their lips. Oh, that’s right. Only they can feel the small waves of lust that rolls off of you

You are currently listening to the raunchiest songs possible (like Closer by Nine Inch Nails, CPR or Squidward Nose by cupcakKe, Motivation by Kelly Rowland and so forth)

Desire, loving this, waves their hand allowing your music to play out loud

Still unaware of them, you continue to cook, and slowly become more and more sensual with your dancing. Your hands are gliding down your sides, you roll your body, and such

Everyone’s eyes widen a bit. How could they forget? How could they forget how you can truly be?

You throw your head back as if letting out a silent moan (as per part of the song). Your eyes are hooded with your lips parted. And you finally catch them in your peripheral. Like a switch, you smile sweetly at him. “Hey, guys.”

But, the dark look doesn’t leave your eyes especially when you lock eyes with Dream

Wait!! Reader knows Michael In the haremverse does that mean we can have a good omens cross over?!? Like reader and aziraphele (I can’t spell ok. At this point you should know lol) sharing tidbits and gossiping over there respective group over hot coco and boos they read together.reader and Crowley always cracking each other up when they hang out like cry laughing sort of thing and they get drunk and dump on the horrible people in there lives and she’s like nagging as to when there going to get married and is all like “I will literally make dream host this wedding if that makes it easier” there like each others number one hype mane when it comes to relationships also Adam from season 1 is like her great-a-thousand-times-over great nephew and that’s how she knows them. Supernatural magnet and all that

YES MY EXACT THOUGHT HIVE MIND!!!

You and Aziraphale love discussing books and you always bring him books from the Dreaming or he visits occasionally to read new ones. He did get lost once in the Dreaming’s library so now he makes sure to have you guide him through the maze of books. Also Lucienne loves with Aziraphale visits

You and Crowley get drunk and sing Queen songs (you at the very least have to sing Fat Bottomed Girls once) while Dream and Aziraphale just stand off to the side and watch both mortified but still deeply in love. Also Hob will definitely join in on yours and Crowley’s drunken fun

Also can you imagine Crowley’s and Aziraphale’s expressions when you say you had a relationship with Lucifer and Michael, they would be stunned. While the other Endless are like ‘I know we don’t understand it either’

You occasionally babysit Adam and take him to the movies, to arcades, and amusement parks with Lucifer (they’re trying to be a good parent or more so a fun uncle/aunt per your encouragement)

Finding snakes (Waking or Dreaming) and always taking a picture to send to Crowley like ‘this you?’

The Endless just in awe how you have literally angels and devils on your shoulders

desire asks who you're favourite ex is in an attempt to piss off dream but he's not bothered you and him will never break up and you and his sister still get along and are good friends obviously death is your favourite ex everyone is shocked when you say despair is

This is so cute I can’t 🥹🥰

Like imagine the surprise from everyone despair included and you just smile at them

“Despair loved when I tried poetry. I wrote about some painful things to help, and she was so supportive,” you began.

Desire looked to their twin. Despair almost curled in on herself. Her hooked ring clutched close to her chest.

“I loved when we watched sad movies and got ice cream late at night.”

“Was it always … sad?” Hob asked. It sounded sad.

“No, it was never sad,” you reassured. “She always cheered me up. We cried over stories which always made me feel better. We could talk for hours and I know I can always go to her for anything.”

Everyone turned towards Despair. Her cheeks tinted a faint pink at your kind words. Then they all turned back towards you.

You smiled softly, “Despair is part of life, and I love when she’s in mine. I know it’s temporary and I’ll eventually make it out okay.”

I have so many ideas trust your inbox is going to be flooded! You can ignore me if I annoy you lol. Okay so somehow the convo topic with her ex picnic gets to like weird art and reader talks about how they meet this woman I. An art seminar she took over the summer during college that was taught by this odd woman who looked like weird Barbie from the Barbie movie times ten (idk how to describe delirium sorry) and was named debi or Dana or something? And she always was laughing at something or the other even if nothing was funny and that she once likened an art piece of the readers so much that she kissed them right on the lips and oddly enough reader didn’t hate it and she off handily mentions that her lips tasted like the perfect cross between raspberry’s , lemon and bubblegum

IM NEVER IGNORING YOU BECAUSE I FUCKING LOVE THIS

But like also Delirium modeling for you? So maybe you go home and find your old sketchbook to show the others and they are just again wondering how you did it again, how did you get another Endless’s attention?

Also you staying after class long to talk with Delirium and enjoy her ramblings even if they are hard to follow, and maybe she takes you on a trip to an art museum where you swore paintings and statues moved but thought you were just exhausted from the day before. Maybe she gives you an earring or a ring of hers that you keep safe in a sock drawer, maybe you still occasionally draw her years later because you can still vividly remember how vibrant she was

(In Oprah’s voice) you get a story prompt and you get a story prompt! Me again lol! This one is about Orpheus dreams kid. What if the reader was a follower of Dionices (how tf do you spell that!?) when Orpheus came around and when the ladies were all like let’s rip him apart! The reader was all like how bout no?? So during the night she sneaks him out and even though he insists to repay her she’s like dude just go. So like as thanks he puts in a good word for her to his father and the rest of the endless thus kicking off the supernatural harem and giving reader a pre assigned bestie and man in her corner who always vouches for her and keeps an eye on her (we need more Orpheus content for real)

God all your ideas are so cute and fluffy and my heart can’t stand it

Almost like the reader kinda becomes a rumor/gossip of a kind hearted mortal and when the endless do meet the, they’re all like ‘it’s you! Oh I heard about you’ and you’re just like ‘what? Me? If you say so’

But like being friends with Orpheus and maybe purposely causing chaos in the Dreaming. Dream gets annoyed but then you just smile and say ‘sorry, Orpheus was feeling down so I thought would cheer him up’ or ‘sorry, I had a bad day and I just wanted to let loose’ and of course Dream is frustrated because he can’t stay mad at you

Also Orpheus teaching you to play instruments or to sing but most of the time you just shake your head and say ‘no I like it better when you sing/play’

Also Orpheus running to you first when he loses Eurydice

Also I love your sandman haremverse and my brain thought, what if you called it the H&H, sort of a play on the Harem & Hob? Cause we cannot forget Hob 😭😂

H&H is so cute!!!

And far we have all of the Endless, Calliope, Hob, Lucifer (also probably Johanna I’m adding her now), maybe Nada (can’t remember if she was part of it) and literally anyone (could probably add Corinthian cuz that is also hilarious)

It’s basically the whole cast and you just standing in the middle with a big ol smile like yup I tapped all of this (or not maybe you’re just very close platonically up to you)

God what are other names we could think of? My brain power is very limited today

Wait I have more for the haremverse lol! Reader out of the blue one day to her (seven evil exes lol) exes mentions about having known a burly ginger man who had just the sweetest Irish wolfhound she bumped into him on like the street and spilled coffee all over him or something and who she poured her heart out to in a momentary moment of weakness and he gave her a daffodil ( it means hope for the future in flower language) and she was overcome with this feeling of calm she wanted to thank him but he left before she could even get his name. She never really stopped thinking of him though and in times of extreme stress,sadness etc there’s always a daffodil left on her doorstep that she can’t help but feel is from him. :)

This is honestly so sweet I can’t 🥹😭

I just absolutely adore the idea of the reader always entangling themself with the endless or other beings like basically a magnet to the supernatural

And I also love all the exs being like ‘how? How are you doing this?’ And the reader just smiles and they all are like ‘never mind I get it’

But Destruction always leaving you a flower when you’re sad is so cute. Like what if you have a wall of dried pressed flowers from him? Or you always have a vase full of flowers to just remind you of him (a few are his but most are store bought)? God I fucking love this