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readysetjo · 7 years

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PS/ SS - Chapter 5 - Diagon Alley

@alluringcliche @feelsandotps @wearywanderer @xingshining

I’m wondering what personal story I’m going to share today!

Also, I’m sleepy I hope that doesn’t affect (?)/ effect (?)/ change/ manipulate/ twist/ adjust (I am avoiding looking up the difference between the words “affect” and “effect” for the 100th time in my life) my normal chapter liveblog. I was dedicated to writing this tonight, tho.

I forget that they didn’t automatically leave after that tense evening discussion

I have a headcanon that the pouches on The Daily Prophet’s owls have a charm that vanishes the money and deposits it into a Gringotts bank account. Otherwise the birds would get so heavy-ladened after a while and I imagine that the Prophet’s bird’s would be frequently stolen from. Imagine working at the Prophet’s owlery. That would be a little fun for a time.

Hagrid just trusts Harry with rummaging through his coat to find his money. He’s either really sleepy or far too trusting.

“yeh’d be mad ter try an’ rob [Gringotts].” /// lol Hagrid so had a chat with Harry about this memory later.

I’d like to see more of the tense dynamic between Fudge and Dumbledore. I bet Fudge would have been so funny to watch come undone under the weight of being Minister and slowly going from asking DD for help nearly every day to telling the reporters/ editors at the Prophet to slip in snide comments about DD. I want to watch that train wreck.

Hagrid’s reasoning to why the Wizarding World is separate from the Muggle one is kind of odd to me. “everyone’d be wantin’ magic solutions to their problems.” Like honestly the actual result of that would probably be a capitalistic one in which the average magical person would be able to sell their magical “solutions to problems” for money. This would just lead to the magical community becoming very wealthy. That’s not really a bad thing (on the surface/ from a wizard’s POV). I think the most logical answer is: “Our community is so different from the Muggle one that creating rules to enforce for the two societies coinciding would be so difficult that we keep ourselves separate in order that we can both create individual systems that works for each society.Also, we are trying to avoid causing strain with a power imbalance.”

“Harry, panting a bit as he ran to keep up” /// I grew up very short with a very tall dad, so I really can relate haha. I would have to occasionally remind him how my stride was two of his.

I wonder what Hagrid was knitting.

I feel like the HP fandom should have had a running joke by now that any deserted store in a strip mall was the entrance to a wizarding community. Tho it seems like the entrance was not visible or had a like “don’t look at me” charm on it rather than how St. Mungo’s was hidden behind a deserted shop.

“Hagrid, clapping his great hand on Harry’s shoulder and making Harry’s knees buckle.” /// That I can’t relate to lol.

“I’m all of a flutter.” /// What a funny and great way to put that lol.

Dedalussssssss!!! One of Harry’s first magical “acquaintances” XD and the truly brave soul who (along with Hestia Jones) watched the Dursley’s for nearly a year. I don’t usually make the joke but... “Rubeus Dedalus Potter you were named for-”

“’What sort of magic do you teach, Professor Quirrell?’ [asked Harry] ‘D-Defense Against the D-D-Dark Arts,’ muttered Professor Quirrell, as though he’s rather not think about it.’”/// 1. I died. I forgot about this line! 2. He went on a year-long break from work to do some research. That is so Ravenclaw. 3. What if Quirrell became known for wearing beanies instead of a turban? 4. I forgot how it was possible that Quirrell could shake Harry’s hand right now. 5. I forgot why Harry’s scar didn’t hurt right now. (I’ll probably remember soon enough, but I wouldn’t mind reminders if I don’t.) 6. You know those words that trip you up for no good reason? Yeah, well I’ve got quite the arsenal of those, but one of them happens to be “squirrel” (why? idk?) and this man helped me remember that the word has two “R”s in it.

“Harry wished he had about eight more eyes.” /// Harry Spider

I wonder what is the cool new broomstick model right now.

Gringotts colors are scarlet and gold and I never noticed before. I think they wore black in the movies or just like nice work clothes. Also, I would like to go to Shell’s Cottage and hear Bill and Fleur tell me all about how Gringotts got started. I am fascinated.

The poem on the door about stealing from Gringotts is so funny to me bc I am just thinking about how cabs have like signs that say that the driver doesn’t carry over a certain amount of money. These are two very different philosophies of deterring a thief.

Three times JKR foreshadowed to us just how stupid it would be to try and rob Gringotts.

Our Muggle banks and safety deposit boxes are so much more efficient and I am grateful.

Hey there Griphook! Well be seeing you again!

So Dumbledore would have told all the professors what they were hiding in Hogwarts, due to asking them for their help to do it right? But did they know why they were hiding the Sorcerer’s Stone? Did they too know that they were trying to suppress Voldemort’s return? I kinda hope they did. It seems to be that Hagrid did.

I like to imagine these seemingly perpetually grumpy goblins actually love their twisty roller coaster-ish cart rides under London.

“Harry didn’t know where to run first now that he had a bag full of money.” /// So happy for him!!

Hagrid told him to get his uniform first almost like a parent haha.

Reminder that Harry disliked Draco for his awful character right from the very beginning and that Draco set himself up for the foul life he ended up with by never seeing the goodness in others as something that he should want too. (I don’t say this to any of you four Questers bc I think you all would agree, but I just had to say it.)

I like how popular and big football is that even wizards know what it is and use it to compare to Quidditch. OMG I’m so stupid I’m just remembering one of the best eras in post-HP publishing history and getting emotional about it. Does anyone remember the 2014 Quidditch World Cup. I obsessed over it that summer and read every word that Ginny wrote and ahhhhh I miss it. I miss Quidditch and Pottermore publishing updates with chapter art and meta and character backgrounds. What a golden era post-DH.

I like that Hagrid said that toads went “out of fashion years ago” so that means that, at one point, toads were vogue and that’s amazing by itself. I bet the professors hated that time. The constant low croaking coming from everyone’s pockets.

“For some reason, the back of his neck prickled. The very dust and silence in [Ollivanders] seemed to tingle with some secret magic.” /// I love that feeling when it happens in real life. Like when you discover a cute little stream on a hike or a beautiful old library.

I sometimes wish I had the memory of Ollivander.

The second “you have your mother’s eyes” drink!

Ollivander had some personal space invading issues. (And it irks me.)

I know I already said that I want to know about like three things in this liveblog, but I’m desperate to know more about wandlore too. I want more facts.

I kind of like that the more difficult it was to find Harry a wand, the happier Ollivander got. That’s a good attitude to have right there. That’s how you know you love your job.

Voldemort’s wand was 13 inches and Harry’s was 11 inches. That means that there’s a chance that Voldemort’s phoenix’s core feather was longer than Harry’s and, therefore lower on Fawkes’ tail.

Gosh wands are expensive.

Goodbye, Ollie, see you later.

Why did they not buy a trunk in Diagon Alley? Where did Harry even get a trunk that he carries around with him for 7 years? These are the real plot holes! jkjkjk

That chapter was a little longer than usual. But since this one has less chapters in it, we are actually almost one third through with it. That’s wild!

#qhpra #me being me #harry potter #ps/ ss #ps/ ss liveblog #hp liveblog

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imdoingthismspaintadventure · 4 years

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In which it keeps happening

Dave: Go online and view sites indicative of your interests.

Oh this should be good.

Oh no more content related to Gamebro and their unholy ilk.

“Grand Snack Fuckyeah”...GTA....I love that it’s not even trying to make a clever pun. You know those “there was an attempt” stickers? This isn’t even an attempt.

Also is that review written by Dave? I want to learn how to write like Dave. That Moses comparison gave me life and took it away at the same time.

“Will popular beverages play a role? And how critical will they be in your quest to attain absolute sweetness?” I HATE that Death Stranding has made that actually not a joke. Just....God fucking dammit. DS is great by the way. ....I just realized Dave Strider and Death Stranding share the same innitials when I typed that. Why does it all fit? This is a weird ass tangent.

Seems every kid has their own browser after all.

You open the HEPHAESTUS web browser and direct it to your ironically maintained blog where you post monthly satirical reviews of GAMEBRO MAGAZINE. Your latest post is a review of the MARCH ISSUE. You've been meaning to write a review for the latest issue too, but you've been sort of dogging it. Something about the game they're reviewing just doesn't strike you as ripe for satirical purposes.

Don’t be a coward Dave! A true artist doesn’t blame his tools! You can make the greatest shitpost ever, I believe in you.

Excuse me what in the fuck

In a new tab you open another one of your sites, a webcomic ironically maintained through a satirical cipher vaguely similar to that of your blog. It's called SWEET BRO AND HELLA JEFF. You have legions of devoted fans, most of whom are totally convinced of your creative persona's sincerity. Which is just how you like it.

...

Is that a real site?

Oh god it’s real

Oh god what the fuck is this

This....This actually takes effort to do. Like, the fucking title is a low res looking JPEG piece of fucking shit, but it’s a finely curated piece of fucking shit.

I just touched one of the buttons and it changed page.

it changed page.

there are more pages.

what

is this another comic entirely??

What...What do I do with this??

Do I liveblog it?? IS this still homestuck?? What is going on????

Okay I asked what the fuck this was, and all you guys answered me with was cryptic warnings and hushed expectations for my suffering and/or ascension. Like this was some sort of cursed chthonian text that would kill my sense of sanity.

Seems about right.

I don’t know why it posted two times I think I might have clicked it twice.

I’m not fixing my mistake cause I think it goes perfectly well with the spirit of the work.

Speaking of the work.

Nani the fuck

So one of these two duders is going to play some games of the video....and he encounter stairs....and he falls down said escaleras.....over and over again....in an endlessly recurring loop........while the other guy just fucking LMAOs at him saying “I told you about the fucking stairs, dumbfuck!” and he keeps falling...and falling...and falling...

Also I have heard “It keeps happening” before as an internet phrase. I’ve used it before What the fuck, it came from here?? From this.... thing??

This....

This is so perfectly and intentionally shitty, the whole comic is way too far to the left even. There’s a huge empty space on the right side.

Is the font fucking comic sans??

OH MY GOD THERE ARE 46 OF THESE.

You know those things that make you go “there isn’t a god”??

THIS IS NOT ONE OF THEM.

This is proof for the existence of a god.

A talented and artful god

who fucking hates you

I’m gonna move on with the actual comic and you guys tell me if I should continue with this thing and when.

I’ll just leave you with this

Dave: Check the latest page of the Midnight Crew.

OH EXCUSE ME FUCKING WHAT

OH WELL SURE LET’S FUCKING GO LET’S JUST OPEN MSPAINTADVENTURES INSIDE THE COMIC ITSELF

IS THE MIDNIGHT CREW THE IN-UNIVERSE VERSION OF THE PROBLEM SLEUTH CAST?? IS THIS WHAT PS IS INSIDE THE COMIC??

You figure as long as you're chilling at your computer you might as well see how that new MSPA story is going. You haven't looked at it in a while.

How meta can we go in this comic?

We’re already way to fucking deep and I don’t know how to swim.

Let’s go back to the shallow end of the pool please.

Midnight Crew.

Oh so we’re actually doing this. Oh.

What is this liveblog session?

Why is there a sword stabbing that map?

"You are members of a sinister gang called the Midnight Crew. Your nefarious plots are serpentine in complexity. Your schemes, convoluted. You are planning a heist in your underground hideout. What will you do?"

I just checked and this is a pararell to “Compensation, adequate” oh my god

It really is Parallel Problem Sleuth

Use Occam's Razor on plans and schemes.

OH MY GOD AN ACTUAL INVENTORY

BUT IT’S REVERSED.

THERE ARE 5 WEAPONS AND ONE ITEM THIS TIME

AND THE WEAPONS ARE ALL HAND-TO-HAND INSTEAD OF GUNS.

Also Occam’s Razor is fucking brilliant name for a Scalpel/Knife.

The right solution to a problem is usually the simplest one.

"Spades Slick uses OCCAM'S RAZOR to carve a circular hole into the HEIST PLANS, freeing it from the knife. You wonder what moron would jam the knife so hard into the table in the first place."

Probably one of you.

Probably all of you.

I know how everyone in these comics is.

SS: Climb ladder and exit hideout. Implement nefarious plots

Oh my god no

They are stuck in their hideouts aren’t they?

I can just feel his anger at this unbelievable bullshit

"You push against the MANHOLE COVER, but it seems some unbelievable jackass has parked your GETAWAY VAN on top of it. A familiar feeling stirs. That feeling is overwhelming, soul-blackening rage. It's the sort of rage that'll make a man feel totally justified in sporting an unnecessarily elaborate assortment of fancy blades."

Spades Slick seems like a hair away from murdering everyone else in that room. And somehow he’s the most relatable one in there.

Dave: Skip ahead a hundred pages or so.

Wait, that’s illegal

What is going on.

Why is everyone beating the shit out of each other?

Why is there a blender in there?

What is that antler thing and why is it coming out from a door?

Who is that guy on that picture?

You don't remember where you last left off, so you jump way ahead. You always forget to save your place in the story. It looks like tempers have become short in this pressure cooker already. You speculate that the tipping point may have been an ill-advised motion for a game of 52 PICKUP.

Jumping ahead in these comics looks like a fine way to get really confused.

Dave: Save your place, read it later.

Hey now that’s familiar

Even though the adventure began recently, it's already over 3000 pages long. You just don't have time for this bullshit. You'll catch up later. Besides, it looks like someone's pestering you. You're pretty sure you know who it is.

How long is homestuck by the way? I know it’s ungodly long but I just want to know the full extent of my road ahead on this foolish endeavor.

Also imma leave it here for today as I try to figure out what the fuck this was

#homestuck liveblog #homestuck #act 2 #mspaintadventures #dave strider #Sweet bro and hella jeff #midnight crew #what #mspaintadventures liveblog

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readysetjo · 7 years

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PS/ SS - Chapter 3 - The Letters From No One

Two posts in a day!

@alluringcliche @feelsandotps @wearywanderer @xingshining

Oh gosh when will the sad Dursley content end??? This is the worst. I want Hagrid. I want Hogwarts. I have this infuriating need to research dates and times, so here’s to sad research I guess. ... Harry was given his “longest-ever punishment” in his cupboard. Starting at Dudley’s birthday and ending when “summer holidays started”. Dudley’s birthday is June 23. And I’ve been doing a bit of digging on the average school schedule for Surrey, UK I’m a bit out of my element, but I think I see that the “Surrey County Council’s” website here says that last year summer term ended on July 21. That makes 29 days (counting Dudley’s birthday). In 1991 it might have been different, but probably not much. That is a whole month. There are no words.

Dudley knocked down Mrs. Figg on his bike, and it’s terrible, but the way JK wrote it made it sound comical almost cartoon-ish bc the woman was on crutches trying to heal from breaking her leg from a month ago. It’s written as slapstick and I feel bad for laughing at it almost.

Bev, you replied to my chapter 2 about Yvonne. We both mentioned our thoughts that it’s not likely that she was nice, if she kept company like Petunia. Here is Dudley following his mother’s footsteps, by having his “gang”. Terrible people like to find other terrible people to enable their actions.

I did a bit of Googling on Smeltings to see if it had any real-life relevance, and I enjoyed this brief forum thread of pictures of the over-the-top uniforms at similar-ish schools. Like Dudley’s uniform seemed too impossible to me, but I get the joke now lol. “maroon tailcoats, orange knickerbockers, and flat straw hats called boaters. They also carried knobby sticks”

To you, Nick and Laura, bc you two may not read the US editions. In your books is the public secondary school that Harry almost went to called Stonewall High? I thought that high school was an American thing.

“’They stuff people’s head down the toilet the first day at Stonewall,’ [Dudley] told Harry. ‘Want to come upstairs and practice?’

‘No, thanks,’ said Harry.’The poor toilet’s never had anything as horrible as your head down it -- it might be sick.’”

Harry is so clever. Look at that twist of a phrase! That’s an impressive joke for an almost eleven year-old kid. Like he probably didn’t watch a lot of tv or anything this is just raw talent. Honestly, there is not a single good reason as to why he wouldn’t be good at writing essays for school when he applies himself.

[After hearing Dudley being praised for his appearance in his school uniform by his parents.] “Harry didn’t trust himself to speak. He thought two of his ribs might already have cracked from trying not to laugh.” /// One of the worst/ best feelings that I know of.

“They heard the click of the mail slot and flop of letters on the doormat.” /// Hedwig’s Theme starts playing.

“he didn’t belong to the library, so he’d never even got rude notes askign for books back.” /// I laughed for two reasons bc for the first time I imagined that this was something that had happened to JKR one too many times so she added it here. Also, bc I myself currently have almost a two dollar fine at the library.

That is quite the large wax seal if Harry could make out all four animals. And it’s purple, which I’m glad about. When I was a kid watching this scene, I didn’t think that it was a wax seal. Bc the envelope was ripped from Harry’s hand and there was a red seal, I thought Harry got a nasty paper cut for years. It seemed a bit unnecessary to have in the movie.

Harry’s non-reaction to the letter saying “cupboard under the stairs” is the most unrealistic thing in this series tbh.

Why did Petunia not ever imagine that Hogwarts sending Harry a letter was a possibility???

The Dursleys moved Harry upstairs in fear that the letter writers would call the authorities on them I bet. This was probably Dumbledore wanting to strike paranoia into The Dursleys. Good.

Dudley’s terrible temper tantrum astounds me. He threw a living animal “through the greenhouse roof” and hurt his parents. I haven’t read this in a while and I’m shocked again.

On the flip side, here’s JKR’s (literal) slapstick humor again: “After a minute of confused fighting, in which everyone got hit a lot by the Smelting stick”

An almost eleven year-old Harry: figured out that, since the letter writer knew he moved rooms and knew that he didn’t get his first letter, that Harry should expect more future attempts at correspondence, and also repaired an alarm clock. Can we please put to rest the fanon that Harry was “unintelligent” and “unobservant”??? And also do the same for Ron too, bc I hate those unfounded claims for Ron as well.

“Uncle Vernon didn’t got to work that day. He stayed at home and nailed up the mail slot.” /// A.K.A. /// “Uncle Vernon didn’t go to work at a company that sells drills. He stayed at home and used a hammer and nails instead.”

Is friutcake more of a thing in the UK/ England?? I’ve watch a bit of The Great British Bake off and I’ve seen a bit more positive reaction to it and Vernon is eating it here without it even being remotely close to Christmas. And somehow I still remembered that JK likes fruitcake. omg I feel like I need to lay down after remembering that very tiny detail from last year. How does the brain work? I don’t remember where my junior prom was at (and a friend asked me that just last week) but I can remember a tiny tweet from March of last yearrrrr???

I just want to know what kind of “nasty letters” the post office were taping to the Dursley’s door saying, “stop boarding up your door we can’t do our jobs.”

They have a milkman. Was that still a thing then??

I looooooooved the deleted scene of a scared Petunia finding the letters in the eggs.

youtube

I would PAY to have Dumbledore and McGonagall’s POV of this chapter. I would pay a lot. I bet it would be filled with both of them fuming and then later laughing bc “Hey Dumbledore, what if we sent a hundred letters to the front desk!!” “OMG, Minerva, that is inspired. Let’s do it.”

Dudley asks the question “Daddy’s gone mad, hasn’t he?” in both the movie and the books, but the movie made Dudley look sympathetic. The book says Dudley asks this “dully”. There’s no concern here.

Its nice to imagine how many letters and bills that got lost to the Dursleys when they left before unblocking the mail slot.

This scene of them on the boat going towards the shack reminds me a lot of Harry and Dumbledore riding in a boat to get the Horcrux.

Harry shivering under a thin blanket on the ground is similar to one of the night’s rest I got during my camping road trip last year. I feel so sad for this tiny child bc it was miserable for like that hour before I woke her to ask if we could layer our sleeping bags and cuddle with her and her dog. It rained that night too and I woke up to a slightly damp sleeping bag bc I happened to sleep touching the side of the tent. lol The personal story was free of charge.

#qhpra #harry potter #ps/ ss liveblog #hp liveblog #me being me #ps/ ss

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readysetjo · 7 years

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PS/ SS Chapter 2 Replies

I got off my butt, and then got back on it, so that I could get some HP liveblog work done today! My chapter 3 post will follow this one. I’m not moving until it’s done.

@xingshining

xingshining replied to your post “Sorcerer’s Stone - Chapter 2 - The Vanishing Glass”

“I won’t blow up the house.” -Harry /// And Harry never did. - No, he just blew up his aunt. XD

The day after I posted this I realized my missed opportunity and then you made the joke for me and I was glad.

@alluringcliche

alluringcliche replied to your post “Sorcerer’s Stone - Chapter 2 - The Vanishing Glass”

I do wonder how old Mrs. Figg is. I mean wizards do live longer I guess theoretically she could have been 60 as the books started. I mean its only five years until OOTP when she testifies.

I wonder if a wizarding life span could be passed down to a squib. [Warning: non-scientist here tries to make science theories. haha] Sometimes when I imagine magical genealogy I think of it being like this magical essence that fills the person, but other times I imagine the magic being in the DNA.

I wonder about this bc, if magical life span is hereditary without the magical component, then that makes the magical and non-magical different in the DNA and does that make the magical more evolved humans?? I know that some squibs can produce a tiny bit of magic sometimes. So if longevity is not in DNA, then a squib may die earlier in life or maybe just not as long as their magical peers??? Then it is true that the appearance of magic is like an essence rather than a genetic trait. Unless the magical are actually adapted humans. IDK where all of this came from omg I need to chill.

alluringcliche replied to your post “Sorcerer’s Stone - Chapter 2 - The Vanishing Glass”

omg I love the old computer picture, i always forget its the 90s

I love to bring back the visuals, so it seems more real. :)

@wearywanderer

wearywanderer replied to your post “Sorcerer’s Stone - Chapter 2 - The Vanishing Glass”

i am bitter, as bitter as bitter gets about petunia in this reread. and remembering the stanford prison experiment (how horrific right?) has just increased my bitterness a thousand fold. Have you ever read "a child called IT?", very reminiscent of the Petunia/Harry situation

(anti TCC thoughts, Nick)

I have not read that book. I know I couldn’t get through it bc I’m too sensitive. I had a friend read the book in high school and vomited bc it was very upsetting to her, and we are very similar. She gave me a few details of it and that was terrible enough. :( So yeah I’m happy as a clam that Petunia dies in TCC (something that miserable play got right.)

wearywanderer replied to your post “Sorcerer’s Stone - Chapter 2 - The Vanishing Glass”

you love snakes? reconsiders our friendship, lol. no i kid i kid. But i have a deathly fear of snakes. Inherited unfortunately from my mother

lol to your kidding. I actually saw a post you made about snakes before. It’s why I started tagging posts with snakes as “sn*kes tw”. :) But IDK I’m a big fan of “underdogs” and I think that’s why I like the weird animals. In my opinion, snakes are the cutest things bc they get around in life by continually hugging things. But I truly understand anyone’s fear of an animal bc I once prayed that if I ever encountered a shark that I would die of an instant heart attack instead lol. And I have actually screamed once when I was surprised by commercials of Sh*rk Week. I hate Sh*rk Week. *shivers* I have sharks blacklisted.

@feelsandotps

feelsandotps replied to your post “Sorcerer’s Stone - Chapter 2 - The Vanishing Glass”

All the witches and wizards that Harry ran into during his youth are all delights. // They are :)) Dedalus!!!

I didn’t even think about him until you all pointed him out! Good man.

#me being me #harry potter #replies #qhpra #hp liveblog #ps/ ss liveblog

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