#not gonna graduate. oh well. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mihai-florescu · 1 month

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How beautiful it is to be changed by a story and to in turn change it

#i think this is gonna be the opening line to my graduation essay #im still trying to piece it all together but i might just keep it fragmented in the end #there doesnt need to be one single story i can just make my point through multiple short stories and objects #and FUCK a target audience the best things are made for you and you alone and if they happen to resonate with others good #if not oh well. i may be an *********** student but i dont careee about target audiences

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bangcakes · 3 months

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#so like is the rest of my life just gonna be Yearning from now on NZNXNXJXNXMX #ok maybe not the rest of it. but the forseeable future. god how do ppl do this. how have ppl BEEN doing this.#ignorance is truly bliss like. i talk to my friends about him n they dont like fully understand bc theyve never liked someone so mucg #its just so embarassing to talk about n i just BDNDJDJNDJD #i just !!!! always imagined myself single. and would Say Stuff about not wanting anything like that but now im a big clown JDJDJDJJDDJ #BUT HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW ITD BE LIKE THIS. GOD #im also like. trying to talk myself out of it. like oh maybe its all in my head JDJDJDJDJDN #but like just too much has happened. idk. im just........ im feeling impatient 😭😭😭😭#but like. its progressed well so far with me just progressing things when they feel Right. hhhhh god #and like things wouldnt have progressed this far without him liking me at least a little????#idk !!!!!!!!!!!! this stuff is so hard. and like i cant even see him now without making plans hhhhhhhhhhh #it was so much easier before we graduated NDJDJDJDJDMMFMD #ah well..... soon i guess. soon #itd be really nice tho if he like asked me out. but i have a feeling that maybe im not being obvious to him?? maybe i gotta spell it out idk #he also said (in ref to a job offer tho) that he wouldnt take it unless it was for sure #and i have a feeling......... that maybe hes not sure ????????? god idk #rip to my simple life. guess i gotta wait til i see him again hhhhhhh #personal

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thedevotionaltour · 4 months

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idk why i think i can be an artist for a career when i can barely get myself to do it in my free time *curls up and dies*

#maybe im not cut out for it. i cant get myself to do it in my free time my skill level is lacking compared to my peers i feel like i dont #understand how to navigate the industry how to actually do this outside of school how to get a job how to publish how to network.#im gonna graduate and im gonna be a failure. oh well. that's ok. it will suck but it will be ok. i'll figure it out.#im never gonna make it in comics like i want to bc i dont know how 😁 i can dream but maybe that's just all it will be. stupid dream.#i should have done anything else.#vent.txt #i didnt mean for this to become so extensive and serious but ouuugh then it really did just become Sad Post. ough. literally whatever.

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kaeyapilled · 1 year

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. (tw heterosexuality)

#i am having the worst sexuality crisis of my life. i was so sure i was a lesbian but there is this One Guy..#he makes me feel things. i think. but i cant categorize them #relationships w men sound.. unappealing.. if i think about it generally #like a random man? sounds weird. or maybe not. i dont know. i havent even had a first kiss lmao i dont really know stuff #but him............oh...........hes so funny and cool and nice to everyone. his hands are pretty (weird thing to notice but ok)#he explains math to me and i cant focus because he's too close. thats so MORTIFYING I THOUGHT I WAS A DYKE #but at the same time 12 year old me was having heart palpitations around my first girl crush and shit #and he hasnt made me feel anything that strong so far. so. idk. but also i was 12. so idk #well okay generally speaking women make me feel much more doing way less #there was this occasion where this girl who i always had a mild thing for but never did anything about it just came up to me #at school #and just. haha lol i had a dream about you last night ;)#i am not joking when i say i felt weak in the knees. she was smiling in a like playful way so i was gonna make a joke but i could not #because i was going to pass out from being too gay #this guy (or any other guy for that matter) doesn't seem to have the power to make me feel like that #..........am i bisexual with a female lean or whatever people say. or am i experiencinf the worst case of comphet of my life #this is awful. not because i don't wanna like men (its just sexuality idc) but because i don't want to prove my mom right #😭what if it WAS a phase #but who knows. mentioning the girl who dreamt about me kind of replaced the thoughts i was having of him for a bit there #i miss her she was nice. well sort of. but i was never involved in the drama so who cares fr. she graduated last year #anyways sorry for breaking character. tumblr user kaeyapilled is lore dropping

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catboyolli · 7 months

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i love feeling like a complete failure 🥰💖

#i couldn't prepare well for today and i'm so gonna fail this midterm exam #because i'm stupid and a failure and i can't sit down and study like any normal person would #welp let's try to cram 2 months worth of classes in 6 hours what could go wrong???????#oh yeah i will keep daydreaming about the blorbos like i have been doing every fucking day so far #i wanna graduate and leave this hell but i can't focus i can't do shit other than cry because i'm a failure and worthless 🥰💖#fuck this life man

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roseworth · 1 year

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girls with no friends have one nice conversation and won’t stop thinking about it for the rest of the day :)

#personal #gonna b sad on here for like 2 seconds but #a bitch (me) is lonely as hell sometimes!!!!#i have a handful of close friends irl that i love dearly #but like. only 1 of them actually lives in the same city as me anymore lol!#so i have like one person n no one else #and like i have people that i talk to and i would consider us sorta friends #but no one that i like. actually hang out with or anything #besides my one friend who is also my roommate lmao #so whenever i have a good convo with someone where they like. idk. acknowledge the fact that i exist outside of when i see them #it sticks with me #and it’s honestly embarrassing but oh well #i just. ugh.#i started college in 2020 during the height of the pandemic #so i couldn’t meet anyone #and now it feels like since i got off on the wrong foot i’ll never actually make any friends #like i have a year and a half until i graduate #and it feels like it’s too late to just. start now #college sucks bro #everyone that told me it would be the best years of my life was a liar #i’m so fucking lonely man #ANYWAYS #sorry for showing my emotions do u still think i’m hot <3

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apricusapollo · 11 months

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the final class of the day was history and our teacher gave us that tiny talk about us already finishing a school basically and how being 12th graders isn't exactly like being pupils anymore and it made me SOOO EMOTIONAL I almost threw up

#well #i'm done with 11th grade #i still have one exam left but.#basically done.#damn.#and this is my favourite teacher i'm :( <3 #i love him so much i can't believe i'm gonna leave him behind when i graduate #can i take him to my uni and Force him to teach me there too #i'm gonna CRY #oh and where'd all the time go by dr. dog was stuck in my head while he was talking to us #almost broke down

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omarfor-orchestra · 1 year

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My favourite thing to do in therapy is dropping the most fucked up thing the darkest parts of my mind can come up with at the very end of the session

#she goes 'unfortunatly i have to stop you but we'll talk about this next time' and the next time she forgets and i try not to talk about it #therapy is going well why do you ask #for example last time i said 'i think they're gonna hispitalize me if i keep losing weight' and she went 'oh we'll talk about this fantasy'#but I'm only gonna talk about my graduation next time #sorry ma'am i know you want to give up on me because I've moved maybe one single step forward in two years

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okkottsus · 1 year

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these last few days were literal hell bc of me having to cram 3 books worth of knowledge into one week due to my procrastination curse, but will i learn my lesson? no, since i still passed the exam

#personal #they asked the most random ass questions tho ?!!!!!!!!!!! like i memorized more than 300 pages for them to just ask the most random ass shit #they were also so moody since they had examined a lot of groups already before ours #and ALSO they asked everyone else in my groups at least 5 questions meanwhile they asked me 3 and a half if that half can even count #is my presence that small akjsjdjk #i answered 2 and couldnt answer 1 and half so techinacally i got what deserved with a 6 out of 10 BUT ??? helloo this wasnt fair #but out of 11 ppl in my group they failed 5 (!!) so me getting such an average grade makes me feel a bit grateful #everyone esle that passed got a 5/10 except for 1 who got a 7 good for her honestly but she was unhappy too since she clearly had studied #for more than that....not to mention we had to wait 2 hours to get in ....tragic BUT OH WELL #IM FREE of public law !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! now theres only criminal law and its gonna be over. for good. oh god #cant believe i will have the chance to graduate in a few months......if i fail the exam in summer and have to try again in fall i will cry

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kiingbiing · 1 year

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#talks #I noticed a pattern #a lot of people who have a crush on me are not emotionally mature #I can’t describe it well but #u know that they have to work in themselves before dating immature vibes you know?#the first guy who liked me told me he followed me to my school cause I transferred somewhere in 4th grade and came back to my original one #I was only at the new school for 3 weeks maximum lol #and he came to my school in 7th grade #and there’s this kid when I used to work somewhere #and I actually ignored her cause I would eat lunch with my friend and she would invade our group #and my friend was so friendly and would engage in the conversation #but I would just be in my phone #she showed her art and said it sucks when we met the first time #I think she’s 17 at the time #she also showed us her poem that same encounter #and I don’t do well with people who are like that #and she managed to get a crush on me even though I blatantly ignore her #and I was already an adult and graduated so he’ll no I’m not gonna even touch that #oh yeah the first guy who liked me? he told me he deliberately followed me to this school cause he saw me in 4th grade other school #😨#like wtf #and then there was my x #so many bad situations whenever someone is romantically interested in me #I always discourage the attempts cause they try to date me instead of being my friend sooo #sorry for the ramble but it’s kind of annoying to know that this shit exist :/

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n0ct0urn1quet · 2 years

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think i migght acactully drop out of school lmao i cannot do this shit anymore . i was fine a second ago but the thoughts got too strong and so now im Mad

#school doesnt start for another month and im already stressed and i just know that when school does start my mental health is just #going to rapidly decline and im gonna not have energy to do anything anymore n im sjut gonna fucking die #like if im being honest since i stopped going to school last year around like november/december my mental health has been Better #not good and not great but better than it is when im in school and i feel like that says a lot.#idc if dropping out means my entire family disowns me my moms already tired of me not going to school bc ive been struggling since #6th grade and its like. ok.#i might as well just not try #like ill be doing online school this year so not going back to public school but still dude i dont want to #i dont wanna do this shit for another 2 fucking eyars ive struggled enough already i cant Take It #i wanna fuckin move out so bad i dont wanna do this shit no more <3 #evereyones like 'oh i could never drop out of school id ruin my relatinship with my mom' n its like #ok well for me theres no relationship to ruin between us in the first place. she hates me and i hate her n thats just how its gonna be #she already is like ignorant when it comes to school n me being in school so why even fuckin bother this year right #seriously just considering dropping out i really dont wanna do this becauuse doing school is just going to take such a tolll on me and like #i just . dont wanna go through it! im done! the american education system can suck my dick.#i dont even think im gonna graduate at 18. i dont think im gonna graduate ever. i didnt finish 6th grade and completely skipped 7th #i pretty much failed 8th bc my grades went down bc i didnt go to school bc of the whole covid thing n i manually passed but that #doesnt count bc i was already skipping school n didnt do the online classes. i didnt finish 9th bc that was also during like the height of #the pandemic and 10th was just a disaster and on my last day i had pretty much an anxiety attack in my 4th period bc my teacher was #a fucking loser.#so. im just done! im fucking done.#not gonna graduate. oh well.

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mecharose · 2 years

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tfw I'm exposed to deathly levels of gaslighting while trying to rebuild my life from being wrecking balled by gaslighting 😵‍💫

#i would love to move out and make money etc etc #but ironically being abused by my mom is siphoning all my energy preventing me from doing that #x_x #oh well Venting Online.#I graduate tomorrow #and ofc shes gonna spend the night before like this #liv shouts into the void

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taketheringtolohac · 7 months

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:///

#the thing is. so so so many people always say I miss you so much oh I miss talking to you but then they. never actually talk to you #and the thing is I KNOW I am a hypocrite like I know I am but also it’s like. I do know that ppl have all these ways of talking to other ppl #and gcs and stuff that I’m literally just not a part of. which is fine of course not my space but also it is like ://#and I should really reach out to friends more like I’ve been meaning to do that with quite a few friends but like. yeah. idk.#there’s a part of me that feels like ppl don’t actually like talking to me when I’m not physically there? bc I am just such a face to face #type of person. and the thing is a lot of ppl get used to anc comfortable with my presence and they notice I’m gone and will #passively or even actively miss me a lot of the time but after that it’s very much like. I’m sort of just a thought #which is like. maybe not fair to me or my friends. but also I am very aware of this phenomena surrounding me #it’s happened uhhh many many times and ppl have even told me it happens. I sort of just haunt ppls narratives with the absence of my presece #but I want to be. more there? if that makes sense. like I wish people would actually ask me things and tell me things. but you know.#I’m gonna start reaching out to friends again soon esp one’s that have graduated but I’m just. yeah. idk. it always just feels #like I’ve been forgotten in a lot of ways. like someone ppl love in general and who is well loved but is more of a representation #of smth rather than a person in itself. idk. I am in my own head rn but yeah. I miss people a lot.#roxy talks

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