Wait so all my apps updated or some shit and I can’t access my photos and there is literally no option in settings on any of my apps that will allows me access to my own photos. I am mad, first Picsart doesn’t let me save my MASTERPIECE AS IT WAS and now it’s not letting me save anything and I can’t post pic to anywhere even tho there is literally no option in my phone settings to allow apps to access my photos. I am so confused, how am I supposed to allow access when the button literally doesn’t exist? I suppose I could try and turn my phone off or exit all the apps but I’m afraid this phone will delete all my photos if I turn it off and I can’t lose my photos. What do?? Help!

I hate that you can’t go backwards in time only forwards it literally pisses me off if I think about it too much. The nostalgia hurts :(

Out of like 3 days I’ve spent most of those days sleeping and probably been up only to eat for like 18-24 hours. Maybe I’ve never slept so much. Maybe it’s a good thing idk

IM FIGHTING THE URGE TO TELL JAEMIN I HAVE 10 CATS AHHH

I’m gonna say it cause idc anymore about other people and their opinions y’all can eat my ass however you want about it but I miss Takahide’s braids. I think he looks ok I guess with short hair but I think those braids were his style honestly I think he looked really good with them and I wish they could’ve given him Dutch braids too or twin braids like more hairstyles on this boy I think he really pulls it off and I think idk I just really liked the styles he had and I think it shaped his face well idk the short hair is not my fav on him but I guess people found out and got mad which I guess is understandable it seems like such a touchy subject nowadays or maybe he wanted them out idk but I notice it’s popular in japan because takahide is not the only one that’s had braids. Anyway no tags for this cause I don’t want this showing up in the rampage tags so more people can eat my ass actually fuck it I don’t care it’s my opinion if you don’t like it go away it’s simple as that

I got laid off from my job and I was offered another position within the company right and so it was either sanitation or helping out in formulation and since I don’t like formulation and know I can’t drive a forklift or lift the buckets I figured sanitation and also gotta snag the opening while I can or else I’d have to do the unemployment nightmare. I’m supposed to start Sunday night and I’m trying to just block everything out rn because I’m scared. I’m nervous about a new environment and having to learn more about chemicals and handling them and cleaning the kettles like perfect and I’m afraid of failing and messing up and panicking and crying in front of the other employees cause then they’ll think I’m a pussy which I am but it’d be embarrassing to cry first day on the job. Idk what do to come Sunday, if I chicken out that would have been a waste of time for the people that interviewed me and HR and I’d feel bad. If I go through with the job I’m going to be on edge the entire time and idk how long this lay off will last like what if the apple department I originally was hired for never comes back and my old company doesn’t contact me and I’m stuck in sanitation forever? I’m afraid of trying any other job; retail, office work, anything. Like I’ve worked production at fruit packaging plants since I was 16 I feel like I am not capable physically or mentally of anything important like stocking shelves and working a cash register and dealing with people and recording info into computers and stuff like I am scared of everything. And I’ve been told stuff like I can do anything I put my mind to blah blah blah and I catch on quickly and all that stuff well if I didn’t have anxiety and a better brain this would be a breeze but my brain is like that of a 5 year old sometimes and I just shut down or panic idk how I’m supposed to make it through life as a fully functioning adult :( like it’s always easier said then done I wish I didn’t have anxiety about this job ugh I hate it here ㅠㅠ

I even attempted to turn to being a sugar baby and let me tell you everyone is scary and scam-y and I just wish I had enough money to live comfortably and not have to worry about losing my job and not being able to take care of the bills and pets idk what to do I want to give up. I’ve tried praying so far just once but I’m not religious and I feel silly asking for guidance idk what to do I want to give up on everything. I just want to stay in bed 24/7 and rot I’m tired and scared and worried and idk what to do.

I KNOW MARK WOULDN’T DO THIS TO ME. I know damn well Onlyoneof wouldn’t treat me like this. I JUST KNOW THAT SOME OF MY FAVS DESPITE BEING MALE WOULD NOT DO THIS TO ME BECAUSE THEY ARE EITHER GIVING FRUIT OR RESPECT WOMAN LIKE BE FUCKING FR AND I NEVER WANT TO STEP FOOT IN FORMULATION AGAIN.

GIRLIES I AM TIRED OF HAVING CRUSHES ON MEN WHY CAN’T THEY HAVE THE CRUSH ON ME 😫😫😫

LEMMIE just get to this first cause that fucking time thai song about fucking, the melody? Is so similar to I think it’s solar eclipse by unvs yeah, like the chorus has the same melody but sped up which is fucking crazy cause OMG pLaGeRisM sksksks

My music app crashing every time I try to add gasoline to my playlist. That’s a hate crime how dare musi I trusted you how dare you treat my babies like this 😤😤😤

I wish I could sleep all day everyday. I love my bed I love sleeping, I love being in my bed, it’s nice and warm and safe and I love sleeping and feeling nothing and I love falling asleep and staying asleep I love..man I might love being dead. Except I’d be cold all the time instead of warm but I wouldn’t feel it so maybe it’ll be okay. No thoughts at all when I sleep no hate no jealousy no angy no sad times only sleepy times I love it. I love my bed and sleeping so much. The only thing is a big bed would be nice and lots off of sanrio themed things and more plushies in general like a soft and comfy cloud but pink. I love my bed. I love taking naps I want someone I can nap with and rot with <3

Oddly enough it’s not the female kpop idols that make me jealous of their bodies and self concern about my own weight, it’s the male idols. Like both kpop and jpop idols. Idk I love the fashion and hairstyles of the girl groups and female idols but I find myself paying more attention to the way male idols dress? Like when they wear hoodies or crop tops or suits especially they way it looks on them and I’m jealous that they make it look good and they don’t have a stomach or breasts that sometimes I feel are in the way. I like my boobs sometimes but sometimes I either wish they were bigger or non-existent so seeing a man in a suit with a flat surface and a little waist and everything looks fit to the body and sleek I’m like I wanna be like that. Body issues really been hitting with me the past 4 years my thinks but since I started this new job (been almost a year), it seems to be getting worse and Idk what to do. I’m trying to eat less and go on walks more but I eat when I’m sad and last week and this week I ate so many donuts and I just want to cut my stomach fat off so I can have a flat stomach and then maybe my boobs won’t bother me as much lol

Bro I’m just straight up not happy. I bought stuff for my birthday hoping it would make me smile and be happy but my birthday is still a month away. I try to watch videos and things I used to find relaxing and make me happy but I just get sad and start thinking about things and I realize I’ll never be happy. I could be skinny and still hate life. I’m fat and sad I could be rich or married and be in a relationship a still be sad and not enjoy life. I could be alone or have friends and still not be happy why can’t they just make pills that I can take and I can not be sad of angy and just be happy I can’t find things I enjoy I hate my job again I cry over dumb shit and I just want to be happy is that too much to ask the universe? Does my family have to be so cursed that we can’t have fun and enjoy a dinner or special day of treat without bad luck happening right after? Is it so bad that I want to have friends to hang out with and go out and have fun and have friends and maybe be in a relationship? Do I have to have bad thoughts? Why can’t I just think about happy stuff and have happy thoughts instead of thinking about someone of something that I saw and then making up imaginary shit to piss me off even more and make me hate myself for no reason. Like why can’t I think that I am enough and buy cute things I like and dress the way I like instead I’m grumpy and sad and hateful to myself just because I think..cause I think men will never want to be in a relationship with me why should that matter fuck what a man thinks about me right I can’t live my life and I will not live everyday trying to please a dick that won’t love me back. Ugh this is so annoyinggg ok I quit I’m done. I just want to sleep I hate working I could be happy if I was rich and didn’t have to leave the house I think idk

Even if he was really ugly with one eye and six buttholes if he has money and if rich I’ll marry him I’m so tired of working I just want to stop working and be rich and just relax 😭😭😭